2 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | JULY 6 - 12, 2016
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THIS WEEK // 7.6-7.12.16 // VOL. 29 ISSUE 14 COVER R STORY
LEADING IS
BELIEVING
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BETTY BURNEY is on a mission to help LOCAL YOUTH. Meet the kids who reach for THE STARS story by JULIE DELEGAL photos by DENNIS HO
FEATURED ARTICLES FEATURED
THE IRON AGE
[11]
TEXTURAL MESSAGES [24]
BY NIKKI SANDERS Rick Bretz is an UNEXPECTED CHAMPION
BY DANIEL A. BROWN Local Artist Thony Aiuppy juxtaposes the PERSONAL AND POLITICAL
AN OPEN LETTER TO MAYOR CURRY
[39]
BY MITCH MARCUS LGBT Retiree takes mayor TO TASK
COLUMNS + CALENDARS FROM THE EDITOR OUR PICKS MAIL/B&B FIGHTIN’ WORDS NEWS FILM
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FROM THE EDITOR
Photo courtesy Bethel United Methodist Church
In a HATEFUL world, rise above the fray
KILLIN’ ’EM WITH
KINDNESS
I COULDN’T STOP STARING AT HIS HANDS. I was in the first pew of a small church buried in the heart of the Appalachians, my mother by my side, as he shuffled to the front and stood before the podium, looking as broken as a man can, a shattered father who has lost a child. He could have wept and moaned and told well-intentioned lies about his daughter, beatifying her beyond reality. No one would have begrudged him that. Instead, in the depths of grief so terrible it is best left unimagined, he spoke of kindness. His voice so quiet we had to strain to hear him, he implored the packed house to go forth and be kind, to use their remaining days and minutes to minimize the ugliness and cruelty that threatens to sweep us away. There were those in the pews who had been everything but kind to his daughter over the years, who had taunted and tormented and ridiculed her — I know, I witnessed it and was often another of their miserable targets — but I felt no joy at the shame that the guilty surely knew when he gently alluded to the pain they had caused his child. Instead, in the midst of grief so terrible it is best left unimagined, I felt hope that his words would change their lives and mine, that somehow the tragedy would make us all better people, that perhaps his raw suffering and the quiet, sad plea he delivered with his eyes trained on the floor and hands shoved into the pockets of his grey suit would give her life — and death — greater meaning. It may seem strange, but I’ve rarely felt so alive. Everyone who has mourned knows grief has a way of putting things into perspective. But you need not lose a loved one to improve your outlook on life. Week after week, I use this space to implore people to have empathy, understanding and kindness for all who breathe, respond and die on this rock. Perhaps I’m not the best, nor most noble messenger; I know all too well the fleeting, sharp pleasure of forgetting higher aspirations and helping stack the pyre when a business capitalizes on a tragedy, a politician gets caught with their hand in
the public coffers, a fame-hungry and racist blogger congratulates a woman who killed her own daughters, or when confronted with any number of reprehensible, appalling acts. But we should all strive to be kind in these moments, to resist the urge to jump into the hateful fray armed with opinions and judgment. Perhaps those who anger us are in the wrong and we, with our mighty opinions, are in the right. Don’t give in. Don’t lower yourself to bullying the bullies to teach them a lesson. This will be difficult. That’s how you know it’s the right thing to do. When faced with cruelty, discrimination or naked opportunism, it is so easy to vilify, to let outrage guide us; we tend to feel better in the heat of battle, when we use our wits and anger to stomp on those who offend our sensibilities, than when we are confronted with horrible words and deeds and do nothing. But we have become so consumed with pointing out bad behavior and proving ourselves right that it feels as if our society is being torn apart by a war in which the weapons are words. No one wins wars. Everyone loses. My sister was treated as poorly by our peers as any child who has been a favorite target for bullies. So was I. There were times in her life when she was consumed with the hatred that others had brought down upon her, infected by the ugliness that had been administered to her, day in and day out, like so much bitter poison. So, too, have there been such times in my life. Sometimes that bitter anger still gets the best of me. But I’m trying. And I’m asking you to try, too. I often think of that day, of sitting ramrodstraight in a high-backed pew surrounded by floor-to-ceiling oiled dark wood, frigid wind rattling 100-year-old stained glass, the chilly pale sun high in a sky so blue and clear it could break a broken heart. I think of my stepfather’s hands shoved deep in his pockets as he used the few moments when he had everyone’s attention, moments in which he could have punished us with his anguish, and instead quietly asked us to go out into the world and be kind. And I feel hope. Claire Goforth claire@folioweekly.com
JULY 6 - 12, 2016 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | 5
’80sLABYRINTH FAIRY TALE
SUN
10
What do you get when you combine a classic tale of good versus evil, the collaborative movie magic of Jim Henson and George Lucas, along with David Bowie with a surely regrettable, mystically moussed-up hairdo? Labyrinth! The film tells the story of a young girl (Jennifer Connelly) who must save her infant brother Toby, who’s been kidnapped by Jareth, the Goblin King (Bowie). Along the way … well, you get the idea. While the film was kind of a stinker upon its release in ’86, since then Labyrinth has become a total cult classic. 2 p.m. Sunday, July 10, The Florida Theatre, Downtown, $7.50, floridatheatre.com.
OUR PICKS (FAIRLY) NEW WAVE
BOY GEORGE & CULTURE CLUB
SAT
9
I’ll Tumble For Ya! At the dawn of the Aeon of MTV, Boy George and Culture Club dominated both the TV screen and radio waves. Their second record, Colour by Numbers, sold a whopping 10 million copies, and their smash hit “Do You Really Want to Hurt Me?” has become a de facto signifier of ’80s UK pop. At their upcoming Jacksonville appearance, the band performs with fellow New Wave faves Annabella Lwin’s Bow Wow Wow (“I Want Candy”), Gene Loves Jezebel, and the Michael Jackson tribute band, Who’s Bad. 6 p.m. Saturday, July 9, Morocco Shrine Auditorium, $20-$499, eventbrite.com.
REASONS TO LEAVE THE HOUSE THIS WEEK
SAX ON THE BEACH SUMMER JAZZ CONCERT SERIES
Not unlike a love of chocolate mint, the Grateful Dead, or Murder, She Wrote, when it comes to smooth jazz, there really is no in-between. Devotees of the extremely laid-back genre will be rewarded when they hit the beach for this week’s Summer Jazz Series, featuring performances by Four 80 East (pictured) with Art Sherrod Jr., Althea Rene and Jeanette Harris, and Isaac Byrd Jr. 5 p.m. Sunday, July 10, SeaWalk Pavilion, Jax Beach, jacksonvillebeach.org.
SUN
10
SAT
SUPPORT SOCCER, SUCKER!
9
JACKSONVILLE ARMADA VS. PUERTO RICO FC
Let’s give it up for those other local football powerhouses, the Jacksonville Armada! This weekend our very own soccer sensations take on the Puerto Rico FC. Come brave the heat, drink a frosty, and support a team that doesn’t boast season stats that make us flinch and, well, drink even more, shame-based frosty cold ones! 7:30 p.m. Saturday, July 9, Community First Park, Baseball Grounds, Downtown, $15-$70, ticketmaster.com.
SAT
9
SOUTHERN RAP DELUXE UNITY FEST 2016
Locals needing a night of downhome rap must hit up Unity Fest 2016. Atlanta-born Jeezy (aka Young Jeezy, pictured) is best known as a member of Boyz n da Hood and for whipping out tunes like “Put On” and “Who Dat.” In ’07, Fort Myers’ very own Plies dominated many a mixtape with his tunes “Shawty” and “Hypnotized,” while Jacquees, the pride of Decatur, Georgia, has added his pipes and raps to the music of folks like T.I. and Rich Homie Quan, serving up jams like “Feel It” and “Iz Dat You.” 8 p.m. Saturday, July 9, Veterans Memorial Arena, Downtown, $35-$98, ticketmaster.com. 6 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | JULY 6 - 12, 2016
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THE MAIL
THE PEN IS MIGHTIER THAN THE WATERBOARD
RE: “Crime and Punishment,” by Claire Goforth, June 29 IN SOME SORT OF PERVERTED AND twisted way, you managed to link the justice meted out for a planned, failed assassination of another human being to racial injustice, mass incarceration, and the most oppressive regimes in the world. For some reason, you left out climate change and cancer. A life sentence is a life sentence. Your attempt to portray a 300-year sentence as crueler than one for 200 years is laughable. Would 80 years seem fairer to you? But the best comes at the end. You say, if this sentence is appropriate for an attempted murder and a second planned attempt at murder, then burning alive, peeling off skin, the rack, the Spanish inquisition and any other horrid practice would be logical punishments for even worse crimes! What? In one convoluted editorial, you’ve achieved a Sarah Palinesque level of absurdity. Wait, is it possible that, as they say in the traffic accident reports, that “alcohol was involved” in the ginning up (ha!) of your rant? That would be forgivable. Otherwise, I think waterboarding would be the best thing for you! Les Parkinson via email
SEE PAGE 27
RE: “Truth, Justice or the Angela Corey Way,” by Claire Goforth, June 22 HAH! THIS IS ABOUT AS POOR A PIECE of investigative journalism that’s ever been written. Maybe an award is in order? The medical examiner retired in 2010. Angela assumed office in 2010. This sounds more like a Harry Shorstein issue, right? He was in office from 1992-2008. But he’s a Democrat so Folio Weekly will turn a blind eye. I’m not much of an Angela Corey fan, but I’ll call it as I see it. Maybe just stick to weekend events listings, Folio Weekly. It’s what you’re good at. Jason Geiger via Facebook EDITOR’S NOTE: Angela Corey was sworn in as State attorney in the Fourth Judicial Circuit Court on Jan. 6, 2009.
TIME FOR A CHANGE
RE: “Leigh: I Intentionally Closed the Primary,” by Julie Delegal, June 27
SOUNDS FAMILIAR … AS LONG AS FLORIDA law allows write-ins to stop the first amendment rights of citizens to vote, this will continue. Why are we not changing the law? Charlene Calise via Facebook
LEND YOUR VOICE If you’d like to respond to something you read in the pages of Folio Weekly Magazine, please send an email (with your name, address, and phone number for verification purposes only) to mail@folioweekly.com, visit us at folioweekly.com, or follow us on Twitter or Facebook (@folioweekly) and join the conversation.
BRICKBATS + BOUQUETS BOUQUETS TO ROY HINMAN II, MD On July 1, Hinman delivered 150 pounds of fish to Southside Church of God in Christ, officially launching The Hinman Project. Through Oct. 15, Hinman, founder and CEO of Island Doctors, will put his wallet, time and effort where hunger is by feeding 5,000 people every month.
BRICKBATS TO KERRI STEWART As Florida Politics reports, Stewart, Jacksonville Mayor Curry’s chief of staff, has been hopping from cushy government job to cushy non-government job with government “no-bid” contracts, such as her stint at Infinity Global Solutions, which an auditor’s report recently found to have improperly received $317,000 while Stewart was head of the Housing & Neighborhoods Department.
BOUQUETS TO JJVA 12U NATIONAL TEAM On June 30, the Jacksonville Juniors Volleyball Association 12U team came in first place in the American Division of the USA Volleyball Girls Junior National Championships in Indianapolis. Led by coach Robin Mignerey and assistant coach Enrico Discacciati, the team of girls under 12 years old went an amazing 11 matches undefeated to capture the title. DO YOU KNOW SOMEONE WHO DESERVES A BOUQUET? HOW ABOUT A BRICKBAT? Send submissions to mail@folioweekly.com; 50 word maximum, concerning a person, place, or topic of local interest. 8 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | JULY 6 - 12, 2016
FOLIO VOICES : FIGHTIN’ WORDS How the GOP has lost its way
THE REPUBLICAN
CRISIS WHAT DOES IT MEAN TO BE A REPUBLICAN? A conservative? It depends on whom you ask. Last week, a not-so-shocking shock poll came out from FloridaPolitics.com. The poll of 590 Republicans regarded the State Attorney race had Melissa Nelson leading, 38 percent to 29 percent, over Angela Corey. Why is that notable? In part because Corey has played the party card to the hilt throughout this campaign. For the first year or so of the race, Corey was running against Wes White, and the narrative was fairly predictable. Corey kept raising money — $10,000 or $15,000 a month. And White would score points, calling press conferences about hot-button issues, and got coverage from a media that, by and large, has grown weary of being hectored by Angela Corey. But earned media can take you only so far. In May, a third candidate — Nelson — got in the race, presenting a meaningful contrast to both Corey and White. She presented an image of youth and vitality, a stark difference from the older and more strident candidates in the race. And she had access to the donor pool that had eluded White. By the end of May’s fundraising, Nelson already had amassed, between her PAC and her campaign account, a third of a million dollars in resources. That buys ads galore. You’ve seen them, soft focus ads that make Nelson seem reasonable, devoted to family, and conservative in a way that actually seems like she’s attempting to conserve something. Her rhetoric at forums and in interviews, as opposed to that of her opponents, offers meaningful reform positions. They might not be enough for some people, but they represent the first glimpse into the 21st century in criminal justice in Jacksonville, where it’s always 1985. And all this is happening despite the most ham-handed, hick-town, brazen play to close a primary to nonRepublicans in Florida history. Even the Republicans, to whom Corey panders like they have badges, are rejecting her. It’s quite amazing. And anomalous. IF NELSON WINS THIS PRIMARY — STILL a big if, despite one poll of Republicans — it will be considered a major upset. And a victory for the donor class. If Nelson didn’t have the reputation in the legal community she has, no one would have ever encouraged her to run. And no one, certainly, would be writing $25,000 checks to her PAC. And if she is able to win this primary running on a positive message, it will be an anomaly in terms of 2016 Republicans. Because the reality is, the party of Lincoln has become the party of Trump. The Republicans of the middle part of last century were the kinds of people you’d see on Mad Men; the Republicans of 2016 are the kinds of people you see in line at the Golden Corral
buffet or the lottery kiosk at the Gate station, grimacing as they pile their buffet plates high or use golf pencils to fill in the bubbles on a Pick 6, wearing their Benghazi Matters T-shirts most days, except on Casual Fridays, when they might break out a shirt with a rebel flag on it. You can see the effects of the Trumpification of the GOP in many ways. And, on a national level, you see people like Richard Armitage endorsing Hillary Clinton — since it’s their opinion that Trump has all of the policy chops of a public commenter at City Council. THE EFFECTS OF THE COARSENING OF THE Republican Party, the embrace of quasi-populist symbolism, can be felt on many levels. In the aftermath of the Pulse shooting, for example, Republicans in Florida struggled with words like “LGBT” and “gay” like they were getting speech therapy after a stroke. If you look at State House races locally, such as in Districts 11 and 12, you see a race to the right on issue after issue. No moderation is brooked; no nuance is allowed. God forbid that someone not grandstand to the cheap seats. The most moderate guy in the HD 12 race, Donnie Horner, just switched from the Democratic Party a few years back. He’s branded himself as a “conservative Republican.” Because nuance doesn’t play in Nassau County. The voters, see, are mad as hell. And they’re not gonna take it anymore. Unless it has a flag decal made in China attached to it. In HD 11, Terrance Freeman, council assistant to Councilman Aaron Bowman from the Jax Chamber, is running. Freeman’s boss sold the HRO to council a few months back, and Freeman was part of that. At a forum last week, though, when asked about the HRO, Freeman punted. Even when asked a follow-up question, he couldn’t say if he supported it or not, instead burbling some inanity about jobs. If you’re a moderate Republican running in NE Florida, you’d better be good at yoga. Because you’re going to have to be flexible. And your principles? Take them to a pawn shop and hock them now. You won’t need them. AG Gancarski mail@folioweekly.com
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FOLIO COMMUNITY : NEWS
THE
CHALLENGER Congressional Candidate AL LAWSON opens up about the environment, criminal justice reform and the need for change in local politics VETERAN POLITICIAN, MODERATE DEMOCRAT and self-described “country boy” Al Lawson cuts a striking figure. Folio Weekly Magazine caught up with Lawson on one of his recent campaign stops in Northeast Florida where, in an effort to introduce himself to voters, he’s been pounding pavement and pressing flesh in a whirlwind of meet-and-greets, events and interviews. Lanky, eloquent and knowledgeable about state and national political machinations and issues, the former Florida state senator and house representative with nearly 30 years’ experience in politics was careful not to say anything particularly critical of his beleaguered opponent, 12-term Congresswoman Corrine Brown. Well-known to voters further west, but a relative newcomer to Northeast Florida, Lawson’s will be an uphill battle to win over local voters who are already familiar with his opponent in time for the Aug. 30 Democratic primary in Florida’s newly drawn Fifth Congressional District. But to hear him tell it, in this case familiarity might breed just the right amount of contempt. Folio Weekly Magazine: Tell us a little bit about yourself. Al Lawson: I grew up in the country hunting and fishing, you know, so really close to environmental issues. Had the opportunity to chair the environment committee in the [state] house and I wrote Preservation 2000. And then I had the opportunity to chair the environment committee in the [state] senate and I did Everglade Restoration and Apalachicola Bay Protection Act and I created environmental education for kids … I was a Democratic leader in the senate and the dean of the legislature. I didn’t think I’d be there that long but I served 18 years [before I was] term-limited out. I basically chaired a lot of major committees in the legislature — from banking and finance to insurance and employee benefit. So I’m pretty much the person who fought for state employees, made sure they got raises, kept their health insurance benefit [costs] down and protected their pension plan. What do you think about the way environmental issues are handled in Florida? I think we have a long ways to go. It’s been hard to get new legislators coming in to understand how important it is for us to 10 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | JULY 6 - 12, 2016
protect our beaches, to put beach restoration money in there, which attracts tourists, and also to protect our springs and our rivers. So it takes them a while to come up to par because that is not as glamorous sometimes as the other issues that affect the state. So as a result there’s a lot of work to be done in there … we have a ways to go. We need a recommitment from the governor’s office and some of the key legislators about the importance of protecting our water supply. What convinced you to run for Congress? I love North Florida and I have not been totally satisfied with the leadership that we’ve had in congress. I know some people asked, ‘Why do you wanna run for Congress?’ Because I know that one person can make a difference because I’ve seen that happen. The legislature over the last 16, 18 years was controlled by the Republicans and I had no problem in working across the aisle to make things really work. How do you plan to introduce yourself to voters from Northeast Florida? I plan to be over in here almost every other week for them to get a chance to know me. A lot of them are aware of me because I’ve done some things on the St. Johns River and other areas. I will tell you that I’ve run in three of the counties, well, really, four of the counties: Gaston, Leon, Jefferson and Madison, and benefited for me with Hamilton over the last couple of years. I had to get more familiar with Baker, you know, and do some work in Duval. I think once people get to know me better and better in Duval, they’ll feel that I bring honesty and integrity to the process which I think is very much needed in Washington and in this particular area. What about those die-hard Corrine Brown supporters who may feel that running against her is an affront to her? This is a new seat and Corrine was in a district that was very gerrymandered from Jacksonville down 95 to Orlando where she’s been the last 20 years plus. I know that she would have some voters here that’s gonna stand by her and that’s the way politics is. But there’s a lot of other voters, maybe 25 or 30 percent of them, that may not have been supporting her. I hope to make inroads with them … Rubio was in town touring some of the government housing … just complaining about how bad they were, dilapidated. Those are housing issues and you have to put
pressure on the federal government to make sure when they give those grants and so forth to the people who build those complexes that they keep them up and they use the dollars the way they should. So you have to determine, I mean, you can like a person, but I tell people in my district, ‘Are you better off ?’ … The people in Duval have to ask themselves the same question: Are we better off ? What will be your priorities if you win? Economic development, the environment, especially the environment. If you don’t have a sustainable environment, you can’t attract economic development. You can’t prepare for future generations. And education, to try to make a college education more affordable for students because the federal government is not doing as much as they should be doing to provide aid. I’ve got students that come by all the time, they’ve been out of school 20 years and they’re still paying back student loans. There’s [an] opportunity to make that kind of change working with the right people. I am more of a moderate kind of person and I like to work between, after the election is over, working with my colleagues on different sides of the aisles to make things happen. That’s the only way that I’ve been able to do it, that’s the only way I know how to do it. So even when I was a Democratic leader… I know how to work in a rural area, I know how to work in an urban area … I bring a different kind of leadership to this community that they’ve never had. How so? The leadership has been, from what I understand, in the past that you either take it or leave it. My thing is to bring the leadership to the community where everybody feels that they are important and that I understand their issues and am willing to work with them. What do you think are some of the greatest challenges we are facing as a nation right now? The greatest challenge we face as a nation is our respect [around] the world. Ever since 9/11, America hasn’t been shown as much respect as we should have simply because of all the things happening around the world. Our leadership has been drifting in terms of how we were the financial guru of the world and we always get involved in helping other people out and sometimes that is not really much appreciated. We have to protect our
borders and we have to provide the security that America really needs. But at the same time, I think that respect would come when you have a legislature and a Congress that work more together with the president and to make sure we have that kind of unity among themselves. Do you think the political climate is toxic in Congress at the moment? There’s no question about it. That’s one of the things that has to change and you have some members of congress who are already starting to say, ‘We’re going in the wrong direction.’ I’ve been a person who’s always been even in favor of term limits in Congress if you can’t get along and that’s not a popular position to have … The older you get in Congress the less you want to work with each other, you want to do your own thing so as a result, I’ve always felt that you need new blood coming in, people who are really committed to the process. Not people who are looking for a job. But people who are committed to providing resources for people who send them there and are willing to work hard and that’s what it’s all about. I wouldn’t go to stay forever. I would like to go to make a difference. Do you see a need for criminal justice reform? Oh, absolutely. We can’t pay our way out of this thing. And even in Florida, the most incarcerat[ing] state in America, a lot of those things were done because now they clearly understand we can’t keep qualified corrections officers, we have people serving sentences that they shouldn’t be … There’s a lot of people in there who need mental health treatment and so forth where they can change their lives. And people, once they have served their time, they need to be able to participate in the process again. It doesn’t do any good if you leave them out in the street and they can’t participate in the process, the more they might go back to a criminal life. I think if you notice, more and more judges that we have taken discretion from in the sentencing guidelines, it’s caused a lot of problems in the state. Any time when you have the criminal justice system that we are putting more money in there than we are putting in education, then there’s a problem… That’s the reason why Jacksonville has about 16 ‘F’ schools. Something has got to be done about that … We are basically talking about our future. Claire Goforth claire@folioweekly.com
FOLIO COMMUNITY : NEWS
THE
IRONAGE
Local retiree muscles inn oonn tthe he PPOWERLIFTING OWERLIFTTING ING S SCENE CENE RICK RI CK B BRETZ RETZ RE TZ IIS S NO NOTT YO YOUR UR R RUN-OF-THE UN-O OF-TH THEE MILL MILL champion. Last month, Bretz, a retiree and novelist in his late 60s, shattered the benchpressing records for his age and weight. On June 4, in San Antonio, Texas, he won the U.S. Powerlifting Association National Benchpress and Deadlift Championship. In addition to winning the national championship for his age and weight, he received the Best Bench Press Lifter award and set new International Powerlifting League records on three consecutive lifts. At the competition, Bretz smashed the previous national record lift of 365 pounds by lifting 380 pounds. Bretz’s achievement is even more impressive considering that he started lifting relatively late in life. “I started lifting weights about 10 years ago and it was just a natural [progression] from my cardio activity in the gym,” Bretz said, adding, “I continued on and gained more and more each year over the 10 years but really didn’t become interested in competing until I was in the gym last September. One of the young fellows on the bench next to me said, ‘You ever think about competing?’” The thought hadn’t crossed his mind, but at that young man’s suggestion, Bretz decided to give competition a try. In October 2015, he entered his first benchpress competition. Since then, his goal has been to break records. Though Bretz can lift more weight than men half his age can, he remains humble, congratulating the gentleman who set the record before him, saying that the man was not only a tough competitor, but “a very strong man.” Now Bretz is looking forward to competing for the world record, a mere 345 pounds. With his current national record of 380 pounds, that may seem like a walk in the park, but he cautioned that competing is never easy. Bretz explained that, although he lifted more than the world record at the national championship, he did not automatically break the record, because the competition didn’t have the appropriate umpires and was not sanctioned. “To be eligible for the world record, it has to be a major event or a national event; that way, the correct umpires are there and they know you are doing it according to all the world rules.” The USPA is very strict when it comes to qualifying: Competitors have to lift in a threetier process, which requires them to hold on to the weight longer, making it one of the most difficult competitions for benchpressing that exists today. Bretz also lifts “raw.” In lifting speak, this means he does not wear any special clothing that makes his lifts easier to perform. Somewhat surprisingly, Bretz is not on
spec eciial ec ial diet. diet He diet di He said sai aid id th the he on onl ly food ly foo ood d he he has has a sp special only stopped eating since he started lifting seriously is French fries; burgers, on the other hand, are one of his favorites. He said that on a normal day, he eats cereal and a protein bar for breakfast, whatever he can pull out of the refrigerator for lunch and the same for dinner. His advice to all the men and women who want to be power lifters is simple: “Leave your cell phone in the car … I see so much texting. If you are going for a physical activity, give your mental activity a break.” On an average day, Bretz works out at least two hours in the morning, usually at Florida Extreme Fitness Center. Bretz said, “That is where the serious competitors go to work out, because they have competition-grade benches and workout equipment.” He doesn’t limit himself to the benchpress; he works on everything. There is one very proud fan at all Bretz’s competitions: his daughter Meredith. She said, “I’m really proud of my Dad — he always taught me to set goals and to work hard to achieve them. He has done just that — set out to become state record holder and now world record holder for the benchpress. He has had a game plan and a goal in mind the entire time. Determination, dedication, and drive got him there.” Even though Bretz is retired from CSX where he was a director of risk management, he doesn’t plan to slow down any time soon. In his spare time, Bretz enjoys educating people about coins. He has published two books, Rick’s Legacy, Pedigree & Hoard/Coins and Currency and Fitzgerald Silver Dollar Collection — ‘The Purple Gang Set.’ In his books, Bretz doesn’t just identify coins, he informs the reader about the history behind the coins. His main focus, and the topic about which he is most passionate, is The Purple Gang, which was led by Lincoln Fitzgerald in the early 1900s. Fitzgerald was a casino owner and mobster thought to be behind several conspiracies that are still unsolved today. Right now, Bretz is focused on upcoming competitions, including the World Powerlifting Congress Exposition on Aug. 27 and 28 at Prime Osborn Convention Center in Jacksonville. “I want to set a new world record with the World Powerlifting Congress,” Bretz wrote via email. He’ll then focus on the International Powerlifting League Benchpress and Deadlift Championship. This is one powerful, determined individual. “My goal is to be the IPL National champion and increase my world record.” Nikki Sanders mail@folioweekly.com JULY 6 - 12, 2016 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | 11
BETTY BURNEY is on a mission to teach Jacksonville’s youth to CHANGE THE WORLD STORY BY
JULIE DELEGAL
Leading is
BELIEVING W
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hen it comes to making Jacksonville a better place to live, Betty Burney is clear about one thing: The adults are getting it all wrong. “The city misses out on what kids can do because the media focus is not on the positive,” she said. The former Duval County School Board chairman set out to change the community’s perception of its young people six years ago when she founded the I’m A STAR Foundation, a nonprofit youth leadership organization. Since then, each year, 45 IAS student members have given up their Saturdays and countless hours of personal time to devote themselves to their community. “If we took the time to engage young people and do true leadership training, we’d have a much more productive city,” Burney said. “We’d see a reduction in crime,” she adds, lamenting that “crime” and “youth” are far too often connected in our civic conversations. At least one elected official has taken notice of Burney’s efforts. “I appreciate her so much,” said Jacksonville City Councilman Bill Gulliford. “She is giving so much time and energy, with her only reward being the success of the program.”
“She’s an asset to the community,” he adds. Gulliford has attended several of IAS’s numerous civic events, and has seen firsthand the impact the group is making. Gulliford helped introduce a middle-school child to his very first taste of fruit at IAS’s most recent Let’s Move Jacksonville food-and-fitness carnival. He also dressed out for IAS’s celebrity basketball fundraiser for homeless students. “Those young kids have accomplished so much when they take on projects. I’m proud of them,” he said. The word “STAR” in I’m A STAR stands for Smart, Talented And Resilient. Children, Burney says, must be taught that they are all of these things in order for them to be all of these things. “If you don’t believe it, you can’t teach it,” she said. “I want kids everywhere to believe that they can change the world and have that belief reinforced in school and at home.”
FROM THE MOUTHS OF BABES
Spending time with Burney’s young “stars” proves that Burney is more than accomplishing her mission. The kids say they’ve grown in ways they never expected; their eyes have been opened to the tremendous needs of others in the community: homeless students, kids who can’t play outdoors, and neighborhoods where fresh produce is nowhere to be found. And they realize that their actions can benefit others. Kirsten Rewis, a 10th-grader at Lee High School, was too shy to talk to her fellow STARs four years ago. Now the 15-year-old speaks confidently about the presentation she gave to the United States Surgeon General during the group’s trip to Washington, D.C. Rising senior Larissa Houston, 17, confesses a previous “attitude problem.” Since joining IAS, she has started to learn how to channel natural leadership abilities into action. She says she was inspired by the professional manner with which one of her peers ran IAS meetings. Tracy Davis, 18, who was named battalion commander of Wolfson High School’s JROTC chapter on June 2, recalls the fun of recording a voiceover for a YouTube video the group produced on childhood obesity, which included an interview with Jacksonville Mayor Lenny Curry. Through IAS, the rising senior has learned that adults in some places in Jacksonville — particularly our city’s food deserts — don’t even know the names of some common vegetables. And when Larissa’s cousin, Kendra Houston, a 2016 Raines graduate, felt that young people weren’t being heard on childhood obesity, she spearheaded a youth-led obesity summit, and 1,500 public school students chimed in. Like many IAS alumni, she has chosen to pursue a health-related career. Kendra, 18, an athlete and culinary artist, dreams of combining her passions by becoming a nutritionist.
CREDIT WHERE CREDIT IS DUE
Each student proudly describes the group’s large-scale service projects: • Let’s Move Jacksonville, a food-andfitness carnival which promotes exercise and healthy eating to thousands of residents each year; • Jacksonville HELPS (Homeless Students Empowered through Leadership, Partnership & Service), which has raised $57,000 for homeless students in Duval County through two celebrity basketball games; • Youth-led childhood obesity summit in December 2014, which led to the student town hall conference with the U.S. Surgeon General this year;
• Healthy Stop Shops, grocery stands that are hosted near corner stores in urban food deserts to bring fresh fruits and vegetables to those communities; and, • #FitOverFat public awareness campaign led by youth, for youth, in partnership with the Duval County Health Department. But the students almost didn’t get credit for their biggest project to date. On April 7, the IAS kids brought U.S. Surgeon General Vivek Murthy to help conduct a town hall conference on childhood obesity at Prime Osborn Convention Center. Murthy spoke to healthcare advocates that morning, and interacted with 1,000 students that afternoon. Afterward, Murthy, the students, a handful of public officials, and hundreds of other citizens marched to Hemming Park, where vendors provided fresh fruits and vegetables. Mayor Lenny Curry then took the opportunity to announce his administration’s healthcare initiatives. A flurry ensued on social media when the Mayor’s Office appeared to take credit on its website for Murthy’s visit. Activist and author Rodney Lawrence Hurst Sr. was the first to correct the error in an April 7 Facebook post, writing: “C’MON MAYOR CURRY. U.S. Surgeon General Vivek Murthy came to town BECAUSE OF the efforts of Mrs. Betty Burney and her “I’m A Star” Youth Program. If you want to take part of the credit for what Mrs. Burney did, go ahead, you are the mayor. BUT in THIS story on the city’s website, mention Mrs. Burney’s name and GIVE MRS. BETTY BURNEY credit and her “I’M A STAR” program credit TOO!” The IAS students had traveled to Washington, D.C. four months earlier to speak with Murthy about childhood obesity. Murthy was so impressed by the youngsters that he called the next day to announce that he’d visit Jacksonville. He also mentioned the group in a national speech just after the kids’ December presentation. “They probably just weren’t aware,” Burney said, gracefully brushing off the perceived mayoral slight. The U.S. Conference of Mayors did recognize the kids’ achievements. Former Mayor Alvin Brown nominated IAS for its efforts to reduce childhood obesity, and the conference awarded the group first place in its “large city” category in April 2015. Even more impressive: This wasn’t merely a youth competition; it was open to all ages, including adults. “Adults see the end product and it’s done so well, they tend to forget it’s the kids who did it,” Burney said.
“TAKE THIS TO THE TURQUOISE!”
Burney believes that young people can lead if given the opportunity. She says too many classrooms feel constraining to students, and lack relevance to the world beyond school walls. She likens these dull environments to the “murky brown” areas in the ocean — uninviting, uninspiring. “The big picture is, there are people out there who need some help. We can talk about it all day long,” Burney said, “but what are we going to do?” Kristen has firsthand experience with the
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Leading is
BELIEVING <<< FROM PREVIOUS bland negativity that can permeate school life. As a sixth-grader, Rewis was hearing only negative impressions of her middle school. But when she joined IAS that year, she learned that perspective changes everything. “I got to meet a whole lot of students at other schools. Everybody talked bad about Jefferson Davis [Middle School] and I got to talk to other students and realize that the same thing happened at other schools.” After that, the negativity was easier to ignore. The quiet 10th-grader, whose love of drawing has morphed into an interest in engineering, contemplated her words carefully before saying what IAS has added to her life. “I feel like students are able to find themselves while helping others,” she said. “They don’t have to accept the real world as it is,” Burney said. “They can make changes to help people.” Burney says she found her spiritual calling during a moment of prayer on the beach: Take them farther, she heard, looking past the churning brown waves toward the horizon. I need you to take them all the way to the turquoise. “Now, when [the students] have a project,” Burney said, “they tell each other, ‘we’ve got to take this to the turquoise.’ And that’s where they go.”
A NUDGE FROM MOM
Long before Kendra Houston learned about “taking it to the turquoise” and met the U.S. Surgeon General, she joined IAS in an unconventional way. The youngest of three children, Kendra thought she was only riding along with her mom to drop her older sister, Kierra, at the first IAS meeting six years ago. But her mother, Kim Houston, had another idea. “I believe in keeping the kids busy,” Kim said, noting that she’d seen a flyer at Butler Middle School advertising the meeting. “I had nine kids at the house and told them to get in the car to go to the store,” she said, which was near LaVilla Middle School. “Four of them actually stayed in the program.” “I was told we were going to the grocery store to get orange juice,” Kendra recalled, “because my sister was going [to the meeting.] We went to LaVilla — I was in my pajamas! Mom said we were just going in for a second.” They stayed for four hours. “I couldn’t leave!” Kendra said, glaring playfully at her mom. “I wasn’t glad at the moment. I just wanted my orange juice and bacon. But I’m glad now. “I liked the environment, the friendly people. We’re from different schools so I got to socialize with friends form different schools that I usually wouldn’t get a chance to talk to.”
BUILDING CONSENSUS
Kendra explained how the 45 students in IAS decide what their calls to action will be. Each year, they consider many topics: teen suicide, bullying, unemployment, homelessness, fitness, etc. “Everybody had different groups,” she said. “Each group came up with a plan for a call to action. We decided which one we could reach in a certain period of time and that’s the one we’d stick with.” Burney says that studying Duval County’s biennial Youth Risk Behavior Surveys, conducted in partnership with the county health department, is integral to the
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ABOVE: Kendra Houston felt that young people weren’t being heard on childhood obesity, so she spearheaded a youth-led obesity summit. Fifteen-hundred public school students chimed in. RIGHT: Student members of I’m A STAR like Tracy Davis give up their Saturdays and countless hours of personal time to devote time to their community. students’ process. “We wanted everyone to have healthier, longer lives,” Houston said. “The number of children who are overweight now has tripled since the ’90s. We want people to outlive their parents.” Childhood obesity became the first issue that IAS focused on, which led them to organize their first Let’s Move Jacksonville food-and-fitness carnival event in 2011 at Edward Waters College. Burney marvels at how well the students from different schools got along together, and how the decision-making process flowed. “When I look at the political climate in our country, the ugliness … I look at these students and I get hope, because of the way they treat each other,” she said.
“THEY FELT THEIR VOICES WERE MUTED.”
Kendra came up with the idea for the 2014 youth-led obesity summit. Months beforehand, Burney took Kendra and a few other students to the 2013 Southern Obesity Summit in Nashville, Tennessee where they found that although there was a youth track at the convention, the adults really weren’t listening to the kids. “They felt their voices were muted,” Burney said. “Within four or five months after that trip, they had put together a youth-led obesity summit.” Rewis’ eyes sparked when she talked about
the two-day gathering of 1,000 high-school students and 500 middle-school students in December 2014. “We’ve talked to so many students,” she said. Rewis said she learned that her fellow students have all sorts of reasons for not being able to eat right or exercise. “Sometimes it was safety. Sometimes there were no sidewalks. It was an experience to hear about everyone else in their environments and why they couldn’t do things.” The summit featured focus groups, workshops, and plenary sessions where students developed their own calls to action. As a result of the summit and hours of painstaking research, Rewis and her fellow STARs have become fluent in some of the most serious issues that plague Jacksonville, like urban food deserts and the lack of safe, walking neighborhoods. They’ve also had the opportunity to share what they’ve learned with the city council. “I think they’re advanced beyond their years,” Gulliford said. Following the summit, and after studying the most recent biennial Youth Risk Behavior Survey, the students urged Burney, “Let’s go to Washington, D.C. We’ll go to the top doctor in America.” With financial assistance from local law firm Farah & Farah and GCA Services, the school system’s cleaning company, 30 IAS students traveled to the nation’s capital in December to share their views on childhood obesity with Murthy. Each student got the chance to present a portion of a speech to the Surgeon General. It was an experience Rewis initially found “nerve-racking.” “When I first started speaking, I didn’t sound very confident, but then when I spoke some more, he did a double-take,” Rewis said. Larissa agreed. “He actually listened to what we said.” The 1,000 high-school students who convened with Dr. Murthy in Jacksonville on April 7 listened carefully to him, too, Rewis said. “You see the looks on their faces when he answered their questions — and they get it.” The 1,500-person march that Murthy led from Prime Osborn to City Hall is commemorated in a YouTube video narrated by Davis. Davis was especially glad to have been able to interview Mayor Curry for the video. “He’s just a regular guy who wants to help,” Davis said.
LET’S MOVE, JACKSONVILLE!
Davis, who has been with IAS since it started six years ago, described Let’s Move Jacksonville, one of IAS’s oldest service projects, which began in 2011, as a family-
“[Burney] is giving so much time and energy with her only reward being the success of the program … She’s an asset to the community.” — Jacksonville City Councilman Bill Gulliford
friendly food-and-fitness carnival. “We had bouncy houses, face-painting, students dressed as fruits and vegetables, and Subway Man. He was the guy from Subway dressed as a sub sandwich, with a cape,” Davis said, smiling. Subway donated 3,000 healthful sandwiches for the event and other donors brought fresh produce. LMJ, which drew 3,000 people to Metropolitan Park last December, also featured vendor booths that rewarded visitors for doing a given number of exercises, like “burpees,” with prizes like tickets to Jacksonville Giants’ games. For the uninitiated, here’s a way to get the old ticker going double-time: To perform a burpee, squat and put your hands flat on the ground, thrust your legs back in a plane position, return to squat, then spring up, flourishing hands in the air. You’ve got to pop up, like a toaster waffle, or it’s simply not a burpee. While Davis said it was exciting to hold the fifth annual LMJ at Metropolitan Park, his favorite year was when they hosted the event on Jacksonville’s Eastside, at a green space on A. Philip Randolph Boulevard. “It was rewarding to help someone when they really needed it,” he said. Health and nutrition are issues the IAS students have repeatedly tackled. Another area of focus is on the many neighborhoods in Jacksonville that don’t have convenient access to fresh fruits and vegetables. “Local corner stores don’t have any fruits and vegetables on the shelf,” Davis said. That includes the corner stores on the Eastside. (See “Eastside is Open for Business,” Folio Weekly Magazine, May 18, 2016.) So IAS developed “Healthy Stop Shops” near neighborhood corner stores to increase access to fresh produce. “People were very excited about it. They were happy to go back and share them with their families. Some of them actually cried,” Davis said. He said that although he grew up eating vegetables, he noticed that some parents who attended the IAS events on the Eastside didn’t know the names of common vegetables, like Brussels sprouts. So at IAS events, they introduce the vegetable and provide recipe ideas. “We also had someone in the kitchen cooking it up. They came out with a cupful and [the residents] loved it.”
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BELIEVING <<< FROM PREVIOUS
“MY ATTITUDE HAS CHANGED.”
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While all four students agreed that they considered themselves leaders before they started participating in IAS, they also agreed that “Mrs. Betty” helped take them to the next level. “I didn’t know I could lead in that many ways,” Larissa said, “helping homeless students, promoting health, and bringing out the leader in other students.” Larissa referenced the second celebrity basketball games that raised $37,000 for homeless students in Jacksonville, including 10 $1,000 college scholarships for homeless students. The group raised $20,000 for homeless students during the celebrity game’s first run. The students enjoyed seeing local celebrities like Artis Gilmore, School Superintendent Nikolai Vitti, and Jacksonville Giants players suit up and hit the court for a good cause. “Dr. Vitti is very competitive,” Kendra noted. The others agreed wholeheartedly. All four had only good things to say about each other. Larissa described the group as “another family” in which she has flourished. The 17-year-old, who will be a senior at Raines next year, says she’s gained maturity from her time with IAS. “My attitude has changed. My attitude was the worst. It’s still in progress.” She had a habit, she said, of not being able to let anything go. “I hate sugarcoating things. I’m very blunt. Back then, I just let it fly,” Larissa said of her first year at Raines. Of the teachers she had then, she said, “They’re, like, I can’t deal with this child. I always got in trouble,” she said. “Now, I really know how to look at the big picture: Just because I’m mad now, is it really worth addressing?” She credits her growth to Mrs. Betty and an older student in the IAS group who became her role model, Khalsea Gordon.
ABOVE: The word “STAR” in I’m A STAR stands for Smart, Talented And Resilient, which 10th-grader Kirsten Rewis believes is inspirational. “I feel like students are able to find themselves while helping others.” RIGHT: “I didn’t know I could lead in that many ways, helping homeless students, promoting health, and bringing out the leader in other students.” “I wanted to be like Khalsea. Seeing the way she ran meetings, the way she spoke to people. She never got mad. “If Mrs. Betty needed anything, Khalsea was on it.” Larissa still struggles with how best to channel her leadership abilities and cultivate her voice. In the Raines Viking Center where we spoke, a piece of posterboard lay on the table. It was homework. Larissa had been asked to redo an assignment about the American Dream, this time including her positive role in it. The original poetry she had written, which referenced fatal police shootings of young black men, asked whether that dream was for everybody, including young people of color. “More like an American nightmare,” she said. “We work hard but it doesn’t always elevate us. “In America, it’s not what you know but who you know to get where you’re going.” At 17, Larissa is already negotiating a tough, adult battle: how to keep her authentic voice while learning to maximize its impact. But she’s already got a piece of the puzzle in place, relationship building.
— Larissa Houston
She has begun to develop her own “who-you-know” network, her personal social currency. She’s already part of the tight-knit family that is IAS. She knows Mrs. Betty Burney. And a handful of local elected officials. And the U.S. Surgeon General. Larissa recalled Murthy entering his office in Washington while the students were in the middle of giving a presentation to his assistant. “His uniform was pretty intimidating,” she said. Larissa still sounds surprised that she and her fellow students were received so well. “We actually made an impact on this man.” Burney said that being heard is important to the IAS students — and to all young people. “The thing I loved about Surgeon General Murthy and his entire staff,” Burney said, “is that they gave the students the real impression they were listening to them. It taught them that there are people who will listen.” “I tell them if the first person doesn’t listen, try the second.” Julie Delegal mail@folioweekly.com
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FOLIO A + E AN INTERCONNECTED
TAIL
Writer-director Todd Solondz’s latest is an inventive, multileveled take on the “DOG MOVIE”
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edophilia, incest and rape. Let’s get those out of the way. Sadly, a cursory online search of the films of Todd Solondz invariably pulls up those descriptors. And even though, for the past 20-plus years, Solondz has been an undeniable master at addressing these and other taboos, usually in the American suburbs, he has been unjustly pigeonholed as a controversial filmmaker. Yet Solondz’s films are merely unafraid to acknowledge the darker realities off life, as well as the lighter, even kindhearted, facets of the human experience. In the ’90s, Solondz released Welcome to the Dollhouse (1995) and Happiness (1998), two films that took a both sardonic and compassionate look at coming-ofage, families, and the sometimes darker undercurrents of American life. Subsequent films like 2001’s Storytelling, Palindromes (2004) and Life During Wartime (2009), with a blend comedy and drama, at times created with innovative structural concepts that challenged the viewer’s proverbial and literal view of cinema, and put the New Jersey-bred Solondz in tandem with literary fiction mavericks like William H. Gass or John Barth, as much as any fellow indie filmmakers. Solondz’s new film, Wiener-Dog, takes the template of the “dog movie” and interlaces it with four stories, the protagonists tethered together by their respective ownership of the same dachshund. Like his previous work, Solondz’s Wiener-Dog is a successful marriage of sadness and humor, where the characters experience insight, sorrow, and even release. Solondz returns to Sun-Ray Cinema on July 8 to screen Wiener-Dog and participate in a Q&A after the film. Folio Weekly Magazine and Solondz discussed dealing with dogs, his views on media, and his gratitude for his work being shown on the big screen. Folio Weekly Magazine: Dachshunds are usually considered to be a cute, adorable breed of dog. I mean, you never see them chained up and snarling in hip-hop videos. Why did you use that breed? Do you simply like dachshunds or was it somehow to disarm the audience and bring them into the story? Todd Solondz: Well, it is a very cute and very charming emblem of the “cute dog” and of course it was an opportunity to offer Dawn Wiener (protagonist of Welcome to the Dollhouse) to reappear. I killed her off in Palindromes and I wanted to offer her a sunnier, happier sort of story and alternate reality. And I felt it would resonate most
effectively with this kind of dog. Although I learned that they’re very difficult because they’re apparently so mentally deficient. Really? Is that right? I didn’t know that. Yeah, I mean it’s part of the business of dog breeding for the marketplace, you know, to sort of retain its cute appearance. All of the inbreeding has resulted in a loss of intellect. How many dogs did you use, like, dozens of dachshunds to get one shot? [Laughs.] No, we used three or four and they were all stupid. They didn’t respond to any commands, ever. And they were show dogs so it just couldn’t get any better in sense of quality than that. There are several breeds that are bred for the marketplace in this way, in that you damage the constitution of the animal. I first saw Welcome to the Dollhouse when it was released in video in the early ’90s and I immediately liked your style of humor. And Wiener-Dog has many moments I think are really hilarious. But your style leans so much toward a kind of deadpan, dark comedy. Do
FILM Mike & Dave Need Wedding Dates ARTS Thony Aiuppy MUSIC NOTS LIVE + LOCAL MUSIC CALENDAR
you think some audiences are so perplexed that your work might be baffling for larger, “pop” audiences? Well, I’m just grateful to have any audience. My films are expressive of a sensibility in which comedy and pathos are intertwined and cruelty and tenderness are wed, and experienced in some kind of simultaneousness. But look, even when I did Welcome to the Dollhouse, there hasn’t been that much difference in the response where audiences would say how funny it is. And others will say, “Why are they laughing? This is so sorrowful and sad and horrible.” But it’s always been both concurrently. On this idea of concurrent emotions or feelings, in Wiener-Dog, I wouldn’t say the people are necessarily happy. To me, they seem unfilled. But they seem somehow both affected by his arrival yet, with maybe the later characters, they also seem so self-absorbed that maybe the dog’s arrival might not affect them either way. I don’t know if I can see them so selfabsorbed in that way but of course I can’t really account for or control the ways that others see the movie. There are four protagonists, and the first one is a little boy who experiences a new understanding of the nature of mortality through this dog. And I don’t see things quite so bleak as that. And with Dawn, I don’t feel like I’ve had a sunnier ending than for what I provided for her. Letting go of the dog allows her to have this kind of romance. I do think things are tougher for the latter two protagonists. But I certainly don’t see it as a uniform, kind of blanket experience, as far as how the dog is in, or affects, their lives.
PG. 22 PG. 24 PG. 26 PG. 27
So do you think the dog is an agent of change who shows up in their lives? I don’t know if the right word would be a “device.” Oh, he is a device. It’s a “dog movie” and it’s about a dog but not really about a dog. You know, when an owner has a pet, we’re all anthropocentric and it’s hard to not anthropomorphize. It’s hard to see a dog in its “dog-ness.” We tend to fill them like vessels with our own hopes and so forth. And we project a kind of innocence or purity on them, so if harm befalls a little dog, it’s more keenly felt. I’m sure you’re used to this by now — but there seems to be a big disconnect between reading about your films and actually seeing them, to the extent where you’ll be categorized as, like, a “dark comedy auteur” followed by a list of controversial topics you’ve addressed. Yet your films have a great deal of tenderness and poignancy in them, too. Do you feel like these sweeping descriptions have somehow negatively compartmentalized your work? Well, it’s out of my control how people respond to my material. And obviously I’ve dealt with subjects that are often sensationalized in the media. And it’s always going to be a limited audience. I know that. But I’m grateful for having been able to make these movies. They’re important for me and I hope that they’ll speak to others as well. So I don’t have any regrets about that, but as far as what people say, one way or another, that remains out of my control. Daniel A. Brown dbrown@folioweekly.com
TODD SOLONDZ SCREENS WIENER-DOG 7 p.m. July 8, Sun-Ray Cinema, 5 Points, $9.50; $8 students, $7 seniors. Q&A after screening, sunraycinema.com
Great Gerwig, who portrays the film’s (nick)namesake, on set with director Solondz. JULY 6 - 12, 2016 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | 19
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FOLIO A+E : FILM “Bro”-style comedy offers a refreshing mélange of RAUNCH AND WIT
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GNARLY NUPTIALS
deviation from the norm, even for her. Being t is a compliment to this movie to write able to legitimately laugh at these scenes and that Mike and Dave Need Wedding Dates many more is essential as the story moves is every bit as crude, crass and boyishly through the standard motions of stupid as the trailers make it look. And 1) the idiotic yet likable brothers predictably that’s all it’s trying to be. It wants to screwing up the wedding, 2) revealing make you laugh with its immaturity and the true nature of their dates’ tarnished outrageousness, shock you with its zaniness, characters, and 3) Dave and Alice falling in and gross you out with its unkempt nudity. love. And it succeeds. I was happy to play along. Delightfully, this is (sort of) based on an One imagines the pitch the studios folks actual event. The real Mike and Dave Stangle made to stars Zac Efron, Adam Devine, posted an ad on Craigslist Anna Kendrick and Aubrey in February 2013, looking Plaza: “Want to go to Hawaii MIKE AND DAVE NEED for acceptable dates for for a few weeks, party, shoot WEDDING DATES their cousin’s wedding, and a movie, go on an ATV ride because the ad went viral, it and enjoy paradise, all on the ***@ Rated R led to more than 15 minutes studio’s dime?” Seems like a of fame for the adventurous no-brainer, and director Jake brothers. Most of what occurs Szymanski let them improv in the movie is fiction (one to keep the vibe on set playful hopes), but if the real-life Mike and Dave and fun — stay for the credit cookies and are anything at all like the movie-life Mike you’ll see what I mean. and Dave we see on the big screen, they’ll The premise for this romp is simple: probably swear the movie is 100 percent real. Idiot twenty-something brothers Mike Regardless, there’s something to be said (Devine) and Dave (Efron) have a bad for a film that just wants to make you laugh. habit of ruining family gatherings, solemn Mike and Dave Need Wedding Dates makes or otherwise, with their ludicrous alcoholyou laugh. That’s good enough for me. fueled antics, and their parents (Stephanie Dan Hudak Faracy, Stephen Root) are tired of it. So mail@folioweekly.com for their sister Jeanie’s (Sugar Lyn Beard) Hawaiian destination wedding to Eric (Sam Richardson), Mike and Dave are told they must bring respectable dates. Smart girls with good values and real jobs, the kind of companions who will be a positive influence. SUN-RAY CINEMA So they do what any slacker guys looking Finding Dory and Independence Day: Resurgence screen for the right girl would do: They post an at 1028 Park St., 5 Points, 359-0049, sunraycinema.com. ad on Craigslist, and of course it goes viral. A 50th anniversary screening of The Endless Summer is 7 p.m. July 6; free. Todd Solondz screens Wiener-Dog at 7 After a series of terrible trial dates, they p.m. July 8; $9.50; $8 students, $7 seniors. A Q&A follows. meet Tatiana (Plaza) and Alice (Kendrick), Swiss Army Man starts July 8. who have neither good values nor good (or SUMMER MOVIE CLASSIC SERIES any) jobs. They are, however, smart enough The 30th anniversary of Labyrinth (David Bowie, Jennifer to dupe the unwitting boys into thinking Connelly) is noted with a screening, 2 p.m. July 10 at The they’re unstanding citizens, all in the interest Florida Theatre, 128 E. Forsyth St., Ste. 300, Downtown, $7.50; 10 for $45; 355-2787, floridatheatre.com. The of a free trip to Hawaii. series runs through Aug. 28. Fun in the sun and much asinine hilarity ensue, and what’s interesting is that the THE CORAZON CINEMA & CAFÉ The Music of Strangers and Rams are running comedy feels fresh even though the story at 36 Granada St., St. Augustine, 679-5736, goes through expected beats. A wild ATV corazoncinemaandcafe.com. The Incredible Shrinking ride takes the young revelers through the Man, noon July 7. Marguerite and I’ll See You in My same valley in Oahu that was used in the Dreams start July 8. Free kids’ movie, Incredibles, 11 a.m. July 9. Game of Thrones 9 p.m. every Sun. Jurassic Park film and, accordingly, the characters have fun recreating moments IMAX THEATER The Legend of Tarzan, National Parks Adventure 3D, A from that movie. Jeanie gets a massage Beautiful Planet 3D and Secret Ocean 3D are screening unlike any we’ve ever seen, and Tatiana at World Golf Village Hall of Fame Theater, St. Augustine, does things for Rihanna tickets that are a 940-4133, worldgolfimax.com. starts July 1.
FILM LISTINGS
22 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | JULY 6 - 12, 2016
FOLIO A+E : MAGIC LANTERNS
Folio Weekly Magazine offers smart picks for ARTIFICIAL INTELLIGENCE
DO THE ROBOT! S
ince Fritz Lang’s 1927 silent classic Metropolis, there have been more than 50 films dealing one way or another with artificial intelligence. Originally, most of them involved robots of one sort or another, like Gort in The Day the Earth Stood Still (1951) or Robby in Forbidden Planet (1956). In the ’60s and ’70s, though, the “thinking” computer came into its own in movies like Godard’s Alphaville (1965) and Colossus: The Forbin Project (1970), only two of many examples. The Godfather of Artificial Intelligence movies, of course, is still Stanley Kubrick’s 2001: A Space Odyssey (1968), though several more recent films have made legitimate efforts to the position, among them Alien (1979), Blade Runner (1982) and Ex Machina (2015) — all (and more) were superb, intelligent films. And if the movies weren’t scary or prophetic enough about the next step in another kind of evolution, there’s Stephen Hawking, warning us time and again that science-fact is about to outstrip science-fiction in terms of the ominous transcendence of our machines. Two overlooked films (one recent, one older) reflect the ambiguity regarding the evolution of artificial intelligence. Neither is the best sci-fi film ever, but they’re well worth a look for those who prefer thought and imagination over special effects and mayhem. Automata (2014), a Spanish-Bulgarian production starring Antonio Banderas (who also produced), was unfairly dismissed by many reviewers as a derivative mishmash of better movies like Blade Runner. The movie and the video releases weren’t helped by misleading cover art — it showed a bald Banderas holding a gun, inevitably suggesting a cheap rip-off the Ridley Scott/ Harrison Ford classic. Automata deserves better. Set in a dystopian future when, due to unusual solar activity, the Earth’s population has been mostly eradicated and the land irradiated, humankind survives within some urban warrens supported by legions of humanoid robots. However, when the robots become capable of repairing and modifying themselves, thus voiding one of their prime directives, insurance investigator Jacq Vaucan (Banderas) senses a greater problem. The influence of Asimov’s Laws of Robotics is apparent to any knowledgeable sci-fi fan, but Automata goes in a different direction than the shoot-’em-up Will Smith version of I, Robot. Jacq, who gets in all kinds of hot water with a very pregnant wife and some
very bad guys, is aided by Cleo, a pleasure bot who looks like Chappie with breasts instead of Daryl Hannah’s Pris in Blade Runner. Jacq’s odyssey of discovery takes him into the barren wilderness where, despite the radiation, he discovers a new kind of life destined to supersede dying humanity. Granted, there are flaws with the script, but the ideas, performances, and direction make up for its narrative defects. Rather than giving us a popcorn movie like I, Robot, director and co-writer Gabe Ibanez envisions an evolving intelligence that aims to strip away its human prototype, becoming something quite else in the process. Near the end, Cleo discards her human faceplate before accompanying her mechanical companions into the new world of the future, one devoid of man. The closing credits of Automata include a clever tribute to HAL’s plaintive tune of “Daisy, Daisy” as he’s lobotomized in 2001. Those who stick around to the end will savor the irony. In 1977, after a decade of truly memorable films including Darling which earned her an Oscar, Julie Christie made her second foray into sci-fi with Demon Seed. (Her first was Truffaut’s Fahrenheit 451.) Director Donald Cammell’s follow-up to his controversial Performance seven years earlier, Demon Seed is based on an early 1973 effort by Dean Koontz, which the author himself radically revised and republished in 1997. When Proteus, an experimental computer designed by Dr. Alex Harris (Fritz Weaver), becomes a tool of militaryindustrial types, the entity’s ambitions and expanding consciousness begin to transcend its mainframe. Using electronic connections to imprison Alex’s estranged wife Susan (Christie) in her own home, Proteus eventually coerces her into becoming the surrogate mother for his “child.” Insemination and delivery result in the unseen fetus’s incubation in a kind of metallic triangular chrysalis, at which point the luckless Alex finally realizes the extent of Proteus’ goal. Radically altering Koontz’s novel, the film’s conclusion is marvelously ambivalent and openended, suggesting quite a different evaluation of the “nuclear” family. Whether humanity is at the behest of a demon or its opposite, the future itself will be inextricably altered. Just like Dr. Hawking has been prophesying. Pat McLeod mail@folioweekly.com
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FOLIO A+E : ARTS
Thony Aiuppy deftly renders the PERSONAL AND POLITICAL in sweeping, contemplative brushstrokes
TEXTURAL
MESSAGES
M
uch is said these days in the world artists to the campus gallery space. “It’s been of visual art about “mark-marking.” thrilling to see, over the years, the way Thony Simply put, the term denotes a kind moves paint and how he has developed his of tacit acknowledgement toward lines, own language in whatever subject from textures, patterns, and even brushstrokes, on a still life, portraiture, or landscape,” Creegan surface. Whether the increasing proliferation explains, of the storytelling aspect of Aiuppy’s of this term is a trendy, ephemeral hashtag, work. “I particularly like how his pieces draw or a celebration of the very terra firma you in through their materiality and provide a and fundamentals of painting remains to very intimate and subtle experience.” be seen. Regardless of the current “markFrom December to May, Aiuppy painted making” craze, for the past few years, Thony approximately 70 paintings; most of them Aiuppy has been known for exploring and small in size. He then narrowed that number emphasizing the power of deliberately scored down to 30 oil-on-wood pieces, half of which lines and swirling thick waves of oils on a are 12 inches by 12 inches. The show’s title, receptive surface. Breath from the Sky, was taken from the Aiuppy paints portraiture, figurative, still Carson McCullers short story of the same life, and landscape settings. Yet a concentration name. “During my frenzied six-month season, on rigid form and a fidelity to subject matter I was filled with something from out of this is generally forgone, instead focusing on world, a breath from the sky, and I couldn’t color qualities and dynamic energies that stop working,” explains Aiuppy. “It was an bind the actual contents together. Bucolic intoxicating experience. Once my summer Floridian panoramas are viewed through a work picked up, the sensation dissipated some; mirage-like haze. Minimally formed figures, I’m expectantly waiting another breath of fresh in usually motionless positions, give a sense of air come fall.” The show is set into what Aiuppy languidness, even being frozen in place. describes as “sub groups,” which include Aiuppy’s primary sources for his scenes are “historic-esque portraits,” still life paintings, culled from regional and pop cultural streams. and The Workers series, which addresses labor “The work that I make helps me understand and working conditions in the South. the world around me, like most other artists. In Aiuppy’s works, likeness takes a I’m heavily influenced by the history of the back seat to emotion. The people generally Deep South and the link to contemporary appear working-class, their expressions are events locally and nationally,” Aiuppy tells emotionless, if not inscrutable, and existing Folio Weekly Magazine, of wellsprings that he in an environment that can appear flattened attempts to gather, tether, and intertwine into due to the almost forceful compression of something altogether new. “In tandem to this, the visual plane. If there are types of journeys I’m a forager of the classics, contemporary that occur within the storylines, they seem fiction, and comics. Painting slows me down to begin and end within the parameters of so that I can digest what I’ve inhaled and then each composition. In this regard, Aiuppy’s piece like and unlike things work finds a kinship with together to make something the Expressionists of early new.” Humans featured 20th-century Germany, THONY AIUPPY exhibit in Aiuppy’s pieces are in who believed the artist’s BREATH FROM THE SKY various states of placement, emotional translation of Opening reception 6-8 p.m. some in motion, others an object or experience July 7, FSCJ Kent Campus seemingly in contemplation. wielded much greater Gallery, fscj.edu. The exhibit “The figure in my work impact than simply displays through July 21. provides me with a recreating real life on a protagonist to build a visual canvas. And the reproduced story, or narrative, around, images of Aiuppy’s work typically in a dystopic Southern landscape.” really do not do it justice, as the much-needed Aiuppy’s new exhibit, Breath from the Sky details of dense strokes, scrapes, and measured masses of paint are diminished. opens this week at Florida State College of There’s a kind of narrowing-down and Jacksonville’s Kent Campus. For the past four honing that’s occurred in his work. Only years, artist-educators Dustin Harewood and three years ago, he was creating larger-scale Mark Creegan have been working together paintings, some more than eight feet by five closely with a shared curatorial vision that brings both emerging and established feet, swathed with vibrant, nearly neon-like
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colors. He acknowledges that this shift is as pragmatic as it is aesthetic. “It goes back to the economy of means idea: How I can do more with less. When I had a big studio, I made gigantic paintings. Now that I have a small studio, I lean toward making smaller work. Limited palette, limited subjects,” he says, of an overall evolution that has resulted in even more diffusion and abstraction. “The smaller format also helps me to work out issues in a single figure painting that I can later use for a larger composition. How can I make the most impactful work, deliver the most precise message with the least amount of distraction? It wouldn’t surprise me if in the future I broke things down even further, removing color perhaps, or even form.” As Aiuppy’s insight and commitment to his work have deepened, so has his resolve strengthened to creatively address social injustices. His content and process seem to have become increasingly minimalistic, but some of his sources for inspiration have become much more complex. “Since 2011, I wanted to make work that helped me better understand my relationship with the Deep South. In 2012 and 2013, I noticed that the characters in the figurative work I made looked like me — white and male,” says Aiuppy. “The killings of Trayvon Martin and Jordan Davis, and then the subsequent tragedies over the last couple years in Ferguson, Charleston, and Baltimore — among others — started me on a path to depicting social and racial injustices in my body of work and incorporating people from different races, genders, ages, and socioeconomic classes.” Aiuppy’s résumé and CV are as impressive as those of any of his local peers. Aiuppy earned a BFA in painting/drawing at University of North Florida. Three years later, he received an MFA in painting at Savannah College of Art & Design. Along with the Kent Campus exhibit, works of the 35-year-old Springfield resident have been featured in solo and group shows as far afield as Venice, Italy and Andalusia Farm, the former home of Flannery O’Connor in Milledgeville,
Georgia. In addition to his gallery experience and educational background, Aiuppy’s an arts educator. He’s taught in public schools, teaches beginning drawing at Reddi-Arts and, since 2014, has been an adjunct professor at UNF, where he teaches traditional painting techniques. He’s also a regular contributor as an arts writer for the locally based politics and cultural site, MetroJacksonville.com. Along with the Kent Campus show, Aiuppy is excited about his work hanging in the Cummer Museum of Art & Gardens. Featuring 10 local artists in all, the group show LIFT: Contemporary Expressions of the African American Experience, came from the concept of creating responses to Jacksonville’s rich artistic African-American heritage, with an emphasis on creating an artful platform to discuss issues around race, equity, and community. Aiuppy’s contributions were inspired by the emotional storms that swirl around racism and prejudice, and the hopeful, calming resolve of tolerance and peace. “I feel honored to take part in this show,” says Aiuppy. “And I think that the social impact it’s having is very important and has placed the Ritz Theatre, an important contributing partner, on the map as a destination location for a segment of the population that hasn’t given them [the Ritz] much thought in the past.” While Aiuppy’s paintings can offer a sense of measured action, his creative discipline keeps him in motion. In late July, his solo landscape show, Nomad Exquisite, opens at Jewish Community Alliance’s Vandroff Art Gallery; early next year, he’ll exhibit another solo show at Karpeles Manuscript Library Museum. Current accomplishments aside, Aiuppy stays grounded in the momentary, and apparently needed, experience of being an artist. “The joy is in the making, not in the keepsake. I have to paint or draw. If two or more days go by and I haven’t worked on something, anything, my hands shake and start to sweat.” Daniel A. Brown dbrown@folioweekly.com
ARTS + EVENTS PERFORMANCE
CONSTELLATIONS The 5 & Dime, A Theatre Company and New Leaf Construction Inc. present Nick Payne’s romantic play, about love, relationships, and possibilities, 7:30 p.m. July 8 and 9; 2 p.m. July 10, at Cummer Museum of Art & Gardens, 829 Riverside Ave., $20; $15 prior to July 7; through July 17, the5anddime.org. JUMP ’N’ JIVE JULIET Limelight Theatre presents an upbeat, kid-geared musical, about two 1940s families forced to reconcile their respective loves of Shakespeare and the jitterbug, 7:30 p.m. July 8; 2 and 7:30 p.m. July 9; 2 p.m. July 10, at 11 Old Mission Ave., St. Augustine, 825-1164, $5-$10, limelight-theatre.org. THE COMPLETE WORKS OF WILLIAM SHAKESPEARE (ABRIDGED AND REVISED) Amelia Community Theatre stages a much-loved comedy, which condenses 37 plays into 97 minutes, 8 p.m. July 8 and 9, at 207/209 Cedar St., Fernandina Beach, 261-6749, $15; through July 16, ameliacommunitytheatre.org. BEAUTY & THE BEAST Alhambra Theatre & Dining presents the Tony-winning musical about love between a monster (or is he?) and a princess, through July 31. Dinner 6 p.m.; brunch noon; featuring award-winning Executive Chef DeJuan Roy’s themed menu, at Alhambra Theatre & Dining, 12000 Beach Blvd., Southside, 641-1212, $35-$62, alhambrajax.com.
CLASSICAL, CHOIR & JAZZ
BEN ADKINS CD RELEASE Jazz drummer Adkins and his band (Joshua Bowlus, Stan Piper, Paul Miller) and guests Jay Forman, Chris Adkins, and Michael Emmert, celebrate the release of Adkins’ new album, sal.ma.gun.di., at 8 p.m. July 8, at The Parlour (behind Grape & Grain), 2000 San Marco Blvd., San Marco, 396-4455, parlourjax.com.
COMEDY
ARNEZ J This comedian, onetime host of Comic View,, appears 7:30 p.m. July 7; and 7:30 and 9:45 p.m. July 8 and 9, at The Comedy Zone, 3130 Hartley Rd., Mandarin, 292-4242, $25-$30, comedyzone.com. BRUH MAN The funnyman, of Lock Up and Ain’t It Bad, appears 8 p.m. July 8; and 8 and 10:30 p.m. July 9, at The Comedy Club of Jacksonville, 11000 Beach Blvd., Southside, 646-4277, $15-$25, jacksonvillecomedy.com. COMEDY NIGHT IN ST. AUGUSTINE Casey Crawford hosts an evening of comedy, 8 p.m. July 8 and every second Fri., at Corazon Cinema & Café, 36 Granada St., St. Augustine, 679-5736, $5, corazoncinemaandcafe.com. HOT POTATO COMEDY HOUR Local comics, 9 p.m. every Mon. at Rain Dogs., 1045 Park St., Riverside, free, 379-4969. OPEN MIC COMEDY Spliff’s Gastropub has open mic 9 p.m. every Tue. at 15 Ocean St., Downtown, 844-5000.
CALLS & WORKSHOPS
FOLIO MEDIA HOUSE TABLESIDE GALLERIES Folio Weekly Magazine seeks submissions from artists working in all media interested in having work displayed in some of Northeast Florida’s prominent restaurants. Details, call Kyle Willis, 383-5650, tablesidegalleries@folioweekly.com. SWIM SHORTS FILM FESTIVAL SEEKS SUBMISSIONS St. Johns Riverkeeper and Swim Shorts Film Festival invite filmmakers of all ages to create a five-minute film about their favorite Northeast Florida waterway or water activity. Contest is free; deadline July 15. Chosen films are screened Aug. 18 at Sun-Ray Cinema. swimshortsfilmfest.org. NEW TOWN URBAN FARM Urban Geoponics and New Town are developing a large community garden at Pearce and West Third streets, in the New Town/Edward Waters area, Northside. It will provide fresh produce and a hands-on, open-air center of learning for the community and area students. Urban Farm meets 10 a.m.-1 p.m. every Sun. Details, call Diallo-Sekou at 706-284-9808.
ART WALKS & MARKETS
RIVERSIDE ARTS MARKET Local, regional art, music – Morning Yoga with Dori Thomsen (9 a.m.), Chasing Jonah, Al Poindexter, Collapsible B, Joey Kerr – food, farmers market, 10 a.m.-4 p.m. July 9 under the Fuller Warren Bridge, 715 Riverside Ave., free admission, 389-2449, riversideartsmarket.com. FIRST WEDNESDAY ART WALK The walk, held 5-9 p.m. July 6 – this month’s theme is Red, White & BBQ – has live music venues and hotspots open after 9 p.m., spanning 15 blocks in Downtown Jacksonville. iloveartwalk.com.
MUSEUMS
CUMMER MUSEUM OF ART & GARDENS 29 Riverside Ave., 356-6857, cummermuseum.org. Lift: Contemporary Expressions of the African American Experience, works of local artists Thony Aiuppy, Glendia Cooper, Ingrid Damiani, Overstreet Ducasse, Dustin Harewood, Marsha Hatcher, Hiromi Moneyhun, Princess Rashid, Chip Southworth, and Roosevelt Watson III, responding to the area’s artistic African-American heritage, through Feb. 12. David Hayes: The Sentinel Series, sculptures of geometrically abstract, organic forms, displays through Oct. 2. MUSEUM OF CONTEMPORARY ART JACKSONVILLE 333 N. Laura St., 366-6911, mocajacksonville.unf.edu. Confronting the Canvas: Women of Abstraction, 30 works by six contemporary, female Abstract Expressionist painters, displays through Sept. 4. Amer Kobaslija: A Sense of Place, through Aug. 14.
GALLERIES
ADELE GRAGE CULTURAL CENTER 716 Ocean Blvd., Atlantic Beach, 247-5828, coab.us. An exhibit featuring recent works by painter Marsha Hatcher is on display through Aug. 1. THE ART CENTER Jacksonville Landing, Ste. 139, 233-9252, tacjacksonville.org. Texture Art displays through Aug. 1. Debbie Pounder is the featured artist for July. BREW FIVE POINTS 1024 Park St., 374-5789, brewfivepoints.com. Photographer Edison William’s Confusion of the Dream in Planetary Motion - Great Smoky Mountains, displays through mid-July. HUBLEY GALLERY 804C Anastasia Blvd., St Augustine, 429-9769, hubleygallery.com. Carol Baker is the featured artist through July. KENT CAMPUS GALLERY FSCJ’s Kent Campus, Bldg. E, Room 112A, 3939 Roosevelt Blvd., 646-2300, fscj.edu. An opening reception for painter Thony Aiuppy’s exhibit Breath From the Sky is 6-8 p.m. July 7. The exhibit is on display through July 21. MAIN PUBLIC LIBRARY 4th Floor Atrium, 303 N. Laura St., Downtown, 630-2665, jaxpubliclibrary.org. Buffalo Soldiers Exhibit, marking the 150th anniversary of the Buffalo Soldiers, displays through July 10. MONROE GALLERIES 40 W. Monroe St., Downtown, 881-0209, monroegalleries.com. Works by Barbie BrayWorkman, Jami Childers, Dana Fawn, Leilani Leo, and Dustin Bradley are featured. SOUTHLIGHT GALLERY Bank of America Tower, 50 N. Laura St., Ste. 150, Downtown, 438-4358, southlightgallery.com. Fresh Air: Works Inspired By Nature is on display. Open for Art Walk 5-8 p.m. July 6. ST. AUGUSTINE ART ASSOCIATION 22 Marine St., 824-2310, staaa.org. 2016 Annual Honors Show displays through July 10.
EVENTS
SOUTHSIDE BUSINESS MEN’S CLUB Mayor Lenny Curry is the speaker at the meeting, 12:30 p.m. (buffet lunch at noon) July 6; Florida State Rep. Charles McBurney is the speaker July 13, both at San Jose Country Club, 7529 San Jose Blvd., Mandarin, 419-3205, $25, sbmcjax.com. JACKSONVILLE ARMADA VS. PUERTO RICO FC Local football faves Armada take on Puerto Rico FC at 7:30 p.m. July 9, at Community First Park, Baseball Grounds, Downtown, $15-$70, 633-6100, ticketmaster.com. ESA SURF CONTEST Second in the series, the amateur contest is held 8 a.m.-3 p.m. July 9 at Jax Beach Pier, 100 Fourth Ave. N. For divisions, details and to register, go to nfl.surfesa.org. Fees vary; it’s free to be a spectator. CAMP ROCK Middle-to-high-school-age musician kids learn from professional musicians, play a concert at St. Augustine Amphitheatre, and record an album. Camp is held 9 a.m.-2:30 p.m. July 11-15 at the Amphitheater; $200/ camper. Scholarships available; limited space. Details, apply: eclipserecording.com/camp-rock/index.html. TONCA’S BIRTHDAY PARTY It’s the Big Five-Oh for Tonca the Apalachicola alligator snapping turtle. A party is held 10 a.m.-2 p.m. (annual weigh-in 1 p.m., Community Conference Room), July 16 at the Museum of Science & History, 1025 Museum Cir., Southbank, 396-6674, themosh.org. Games, animal encounters, treats. Free with regular admission. RIVERSIDE AVONDALE TROLLEY NIGHTS Every Fri. and Sat., 6 p.m.-2 a.m., Riverside/Avondale; trolley stops are throughout the area; riversideavondalenighttrolley.com. TAI CHI CLASSES Free Tai Chi for Health & Wellness Classes are held 6:30-7:30 a.m. every Tue. and Thur., at 200 First St. Courtyard, Neptune Beach, 234-0038. DARWIN & DINOSAURS The Museum of Science & History presents a new exhibit, with full-size dinosaur skeletons, scientific instruments, original letters, and first editions of Darwin’s main works, through Sept. 5, at 1025 Museum Circle, Southbank, 607-9720, themosh.org. SATURDAY NIGHT LIGHTS The Kemetic Empire/UrbanGeoPonics hold Sankofa Saturdays, where youth ages 6-17 explore activities around fundamental concepts of an African-centered-perspective lifestyle, 7-10 p.m. every Sat. through Aug. 8 at Clanzel Brown Park, 4415 Moncrief Rd. W., Northside, 706-284-9808, urbangeoponics.org, thekemeticempire.com. AMELIA RIVER CRUISES Eco-Shrimping, family-friendly sunset, beach creek, Cumberland Island tours, from 1 N. Front St., Fernandina, 261-9972, ameliarivercruises.com. COSMIC BOWLING Beach Bowl has Cosmic Bowling 10 p.m. Thur., 8 p.m. Fri. and Sat. at 818 Beach Blvd., Jax Beach, 249-9849; $1 each for games, rental shoes, hot dogs, fries; $6.50 beer pitchers; $5 cover; beachbowljaxbeach.com. DAILY EVENTS AT HEMMING PARK Free yoga, group fitness, kids’ activities, 117 W. Duval St., Downtown. Live music, food trucks 11 a.m.-2 p.m. Mon.-Fri.; details at hemmingpark.org/hemming-park-events. JET SKI TOURS Flying Fish Adventures has one-hour, twohour or three-hour tours, from 1 S. Front St., Fernandina Beach. Fees and details, 770-4660, flyingfishfun.com. WEEKLY EVENTS AT UNITY PLAZA Unity Plaza has events including meditation lessons, concerts, festivals, workshops, fitness classes, and more every week, 220 Riverside Ave., 220-5830, unityplaza.org. TRIVIA NIGHT IN ST. AUGUSTINE The Corazon Cinema & Café has Trivia every Wed., 36 Granada St., 679-5736, corazoncinemaandcafe.com. To list an event, send time, date, location (street address, city), admission price, contact number to print to Daniel A. Brown – email dbrown@folioweekly.com or mail, 45 W. Bay St., Ste. 103, Jacksonville FL 32202. Items run as space is available. Deadline noon Wed. for next Wed. printing.
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FOLIO A+E : MUSIC
STAND ALONE There’s nothing else like Memphis band NOTS — and the WORLD’S MUCH BETTER for it
I
f Memphis post-punk quartet NOTS could collectively speak to the rest of the garage rock world, the conversation would go something like this: “Y’all keep on circling the drain with generic psychedelia and countrified cheap thrills — we’re going to defy every stylistic convention and create sounds that will wreck your ears and blow your mind.” OK, so maybe that’s what a music writer would say to describe the music made by Natalie Hoffman, Alexandra Eastburn, Charlotte Watson, and Meredith Lones. But the unnerving sense of existential dread and No Wave distortion packed into their punchy, unpredictable songs blaze trails mostly unseen and unheard in recent years. Yes, The Slits and X-Ray Spex are touchstones. But as they said on their 2014 debut album, We Are NOTS — and its follow-up, Cosmetic, which drops in September, builds on that affirmation of singular identity. Folio Weekly Magazine met with eminently friendly frontwoman Natalie Hoffman to discuss gut reactions, spontaneity, and keeping things both interesting and relevant.
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lyrics, and with the rhythms. Some of the songs are not straightforward at all, and the versions that are on the album capture that moment where we’re still trying to figure it out. And we still don’t play those songs the same way every night. That spontaneity seems to be a hallmark of NOTS. We have to stay interested in the music — if we’re not, the crowd won’t be. And it’s super-important for us to keep it unpredictable. “Surprising” is even a good word. I don’t get that feeling very often these days, so the best bands are those that surprise you — even make you mad at first. I think it’s important to continually strive for something larger like that.
There’s a striking element of unsettled unease in the band’s music. Does that come from a personal place? It’s personal in the way that everything’s become personal in America — especially in this age when horrifying things are being said on the news by major political figures. When you have a gut reaction to that, it becomes personal for you. I think Folio Weekly Magazine: It seems like the sound and feel of Cosmetic comes NOTS has been touring nonstop lately. more from our interest in post-punk, Is that a good thing? experimental, and psychedelic music, which Natalie Hoffman: Definitely. We all can have this ability to unnerve you more work part-time jobs than a straightforward throughout the year punk song. NOTS with to fill in the gaps, but now THE MOLD, FEVER HANDS, that we’re touring more, Are there any other new PERMANENT MAKEUP the focus is shifting more bands inspiring NOTS in 8 p.m. July 10, The Headlamp, 818 Clay St., Springfield, $10 toward music and away that way? from the other mundane I am more and more stuff. It is bittersweet, but surprised by newer bands, we definitely wanted to work up to this level especially the ones we see on tour. Total of touring. Control is a good example. And we played with a band in London called The Es, who You have a new album, Cosmetic, out in were incredible. Brand new, too — they’d September. How do you think it differs from been playing for less than a month. It was your 2014 debut We Are NOTS? surprising and unsettling, and the way the We were more experimental in the writing singer delivered her vocals sounded like process because we all wanted to try new classic female-fronted punk but with a things with our instruments, with the whole ’nother element to it.
“The music is the most important thing, and as long as we feel like we’re DOING SOMETHING RELEVANT that affects people, everything will COME NATURALLY.” You and your bandmates backed Quintron when he performed with his Weather Warlock machine in Austin this spring. What was that like? That was an incredible experience. The Weather Warlock machine is one of the most genius things ever created. Just that mentality of playing music together and reacting to each other while having a really loose plan for it … that’s how we wrote a lot of songs on the new album. Hopefully in five years we’ll look back and say, “Wow — we couldn’t duplicate this.” Do you see a more successful road ahead for NOTS? Absolutely. But it’s dangerous to get too comfortable, just like it’s dangerous to read too much criticism about yourself, good or bad. So I don’t get too involved in thinking about the success of the band. We work hard every day, and that’s a constant process. The music is the most important thing, and as long as we feel like we’re doing something relevant that affects people, everything will come naturally. I know a lot of great bands don’t get that chance, but that’s the attitude I have toward it. Nick McGregor mail@folioweekly.com
Local melodic punkers FLAG ON FIRE play July 9 at The Roadhouse, Orange Park.
LIVE + LOCAL MUSIC CONCERTS THIS WEEK
SPADE McQUADE 6 p.m. July 6, Fionn MacCool’s Irish Pub, Jacksonville Landing, Ste. 176, 374-1247. LUCIDEA, The GROOVE ORIENT, CAVE DWELLERS, UNIVERSAL GREEN, DIALECTABLE BEATS vs INFADER, TRICLOPS I At 6 p.m. July 6, 1904 Music Hall, 19 Ocean St., Downtown. Music by the Sea: BILLY BUCHANAN & FREE AVENUE 7 p.m. July 6, St. Augustine Beach Pier & Pavilion, 350 A1A Beach Blvd., thecivicassociation.org. Bring something to sit on. Concerts in the Plaza: BOB MOLINE & the FRIENDS of MINE BAND 7 p.m. July 7, Plaza de la Constitución, St. George & King streets, St. Augustine, 825-1004, concertsintheplaza.com. Adult Twilight BYOB Cruises: DAN VOLL July 7; JIM BARCARO July 8; LARRY LeMIER July 9 All start at 7 p.m., from 1 N. Front St., Fernandina, 261-9972; details at ameliarivercruises.com. “3” the BAND 9 p.m. July 7, Flying Iguana, 207 Atlantic Blvd., Neptune Beach, 853-5680. DENNY BLUE 4 p.m. July 8, Cruisers Grill, 3 St. George St., St. Augustine, 824-6993. FLAG, WAR ON WOMEN, The DIRTY NIL 6 p.m. July 8, St. Augustine Amphitheatre’s Backyard Party, 1340 A1A S., 209-0367, $25 advance (SRO). The GOOD WOOD BAND, The ANTON LaPLUME BAND 8 p.m. July 8, Jack Rabbits, 1528 Hendricks Ave., San Marco, 398-7496, $8 advance; $10 day of. STITCHES 8 p.m. July 8, Mavericks Live, 2 Independent Dr., Downtown, 356-1110, $15 advance; $20 day of. ROBERT CRAY BAND 8 p.m. July 8, Ponte Vedra Concert Hall, 1050 A1A N., 209-0399, $62.50-$92.50. HOLLOW LEG, YASHIRA, ETHER, RHYTHM of FEAR, SHADOW HUNTER, MEATWOUND 8 p.m. July 8, Rain Dogs, 1045 Park St., Riverside, 379-4969. COLOMBO, DJ D-EXTREME, DJ ROB-E, LAB3 & OFAY, MEKANIZED SOURCE, WALI SADEQ, ALBERT ADKINS 8 p.m. July 8, 1904 Music Hall, $10. Riverside Arts Market: MORNING YOGA with DORI THOMSEN,
CHASING JONAH, AL POINDEXTER, COLLAPSIBLE B, JOEY KERR 10:30 a.m. July 9, 715 Riverside Ave., 389-2449. The NIXON TAPES, BOYSIN, FERNWAY, DIVORCE CULTURE 6 p.m. July 9, 1904 Music Hall, $8 advance; $10 day of. BOY GEORGE & CULTURE CLUB, WHO’S BAD, ANNABELLA LWIN’S BOW WOW WOW, GENE LOVES JEZEBEL 6 p.m. July 9, Morocco Shrine Auditorium, 3800 St. Johns Bluff Rd. S., Southside, 642-5200, $20-$499. FREDDY ROSARIO & FRIENDS 7 p.m. July 9, Murray Hill Theatre, 932 Edgewood Ave. S., Murray Hill, 388-7807, $10. MARK WILLIAMS 7:30 p.m. July 9, Mudville Music Room, 3104 Atlantic Blvd., San Marco, 352-7008, $10. DAVIS TURNER 8 p.m. July 9, Slider’s Seaside Grill, 1998 S. Fletcher Ave., Fernandina Beach, 277-6652. MEADE AVE., DARK SUMMER, The PRESCRIPTION 8 p.m. July 9, Jack Rabbits, $8 advance; $10 day of. POCO, PURE PRAIRIE LEAGUE, FIREFALL 8 p.m. July 9, Florida Theatre, 128 E. Forsyth St., Downtown, 355-2787, $39-$69.50. Unity Fest 2016: JEEZY, JACQUEES, PLIES 8 p.m. July 9, Veterans Memorial Arena, 300 A. Philip Randolph Blvd.,
Downtown, 630-3900, $35-$98. FLAG ON FIRE 10 p.m. July 9, The Roadhouse, 231 Blanding Blvd., Orange Park, 264-0611, $8. Second Sunday at Stetson’s Woody Guthrie Tribute: CINDY BEAR, DAVID MILAM, JEFF PARKER, FRANC ROBERT 2 p.m. July 10, 1523 S.R. 13, Fruit Cove, 206-8304, $10. COMRADES, WITHERED BONES, VAGABONDS, EMA & the OLD KINGS, ZAFTIGK 6 p.m. July 10, Planet Sarbez, 115 Anastasia Blvd., St. Augustine, 342-0632. IMPACT/HANGMAN, DOPE FIEND, MALICIOUS WOUNDING, MENTAL VIOLENCE, GUTTWRENCH 7 p.m. July 10, Jack Rabbits, $7 advance; $10 day of. ORYX, UNEARTHLY CHILD, CAT ARMY 8 p.m. July 10, Shantytown Pub, 22 W. Sixth St., Springfield, 798-8222. The NOTS, The MOLD, FEVER HANDS, PERMANENT MAKEUP 8 p.m. July 10, The Headlamp, 818 Clay St., Springfield, $10. SCHOLAR’S WORD, WHITE ABBOTT, JAH ELECT SELTZA 9:30 p.m. July 10, Harmonious Monks, 320 First St. N., Jax Beach, 372-0815, $7-$20. A MARCH THROUGH MAY, MY CRIMSON WISH, CORRUPTED SAINTS 7 p.m. July 11, Jack Rabbits, $10. EL ESCAPADO, MR. NEVER & the SCARS, SPEEDBAG RESIDUE 8 p.m. July 11, Shantytown Pub. PULSEWIDTHMOD, SEVERED+SAID, OMEBI 8 p.m. July 12, The Headlamp. KING EDDIE & PILI PILI 6 p.m. July 13, Slider’s Seaside Grill, 1998 S. Fletcher Ave., Fernandina Beach, 277-6652. Music by the Sea: JIMMY PARRISH & the WAVES 7 p.m. July 13, St. Augustine Beach Pier & Pavilion, 350 A1A Beach Blvd., thecivicassociation.org. Bring something to sit on. RAZORS EDGE, TOO PHUCKS 7 p.m. July 13, Jack Rabbits, $8 advance; $10 day of.
UPCOMING CONCERTS
98 DEGREES, O TOWN, DREAM, RYAN CABRERA July 14, St. Augustine Amphitheatre JASON MICHAEL CARROLL, MARK WILLS, DARYL WORLEY July 14, Mavericks Live KID INK July 15, Mavericks Live The UNDERHILL FAMILY ORCHESTRA, The SH-BOOMS July 15, Rain Dogs. IN the WHALE, STRANGE FRIEND, LA-A, The MOTHER GOOSES July 16, Harbor Tavern MARIANAS TRENCH July 16, Ponte Vedra Concert Hall SHAWN MENDES July 16, St. Augustine Amphitheatre RUE SNIDER July 16, The Headlamp FLIGHT of the CONCHORDS, ARJ BARKER July 17, St. Augustine Amphitheatre The FUZZLERS, LINDA July 17, The Headlamp RICHIE SPICE July 17, Mavericks Live 5 SECONDS of SUMMER July 20, Veterans Memorial Arena TED NUGENT July 20, Florida Theatre Villainfest 2016: SALEM HOLLOW, NEW DAY, BLEEDING in STEREO, FILTH, INNER DEMONS, LOWRCASE G, PHD, AUTOMATIK FIT July 22, Mavericks Live PLEASURES, ZIEL ZUSTER July 22, The Headlamp AURIC, SATURNINE, UNEARTHLY CHILD July 22, Shantytown Connection Festival: WU-TANG CLAN, CAGE the ELEPHANT,
BIG DATA, ST. LUCIA, NEVER SHOUT NEVER, NEW YORK SKA ENSEMBLE, RUN RIVER NORTH, WHOLE WHEAT BREAD, COLOURS, BROTHER HAWK, WATERSEED, CONTROL THIS!, CLOUD9 VIBES, MOYA MOYA, UNIVERSAL GREEN, ASKMEIFICARE, SKYVIEW, FLAG on FIRE July 23, Downtown CLOUD RAT, CLOSET BURNER, DEFORMED, WØRSEN, MARSELLUS July 23, Rain Dogs. NILE, AFTER the BURIAL, SUFFOCATION July 25, Mavericks 311, MATISYAHU July 26, St. Augustine Amphitheatre TODRICK HALL July 26, The Florida Theatre CRAIG MORGAN July 28, The Florida Theatre BRING IT! LIVE July 29, The Florida Theatre LUKE COMBS July 29, Mavericks Live MR. CLIT & the PINK CIGARETTES July 29, The Headlamp EMMA MOSELEY BAND, KRISTOPHER JAMES, CURT TOWNE BAND July 30, St. Augustine Amphitheatre Backyard Party MATTHEW LOGAN VASQUEZ July 31, Café Eleven DAVID BAZAN, MICHAEL NAU Aug. 4, Jack Rabbits CHRIS STAPLETON Aug. 4, St. Augustine Amphitheatre J.W. TELLER Aug. 5, The Headlamp The HIPABUCTION Aug. 6, Lynch’s Irish Pub The ACACIA STRAIN, OCEANO, KNOCKED LOOSE, CULTURE KILLER, TO the WIND Aug. 6, 1904 Music Hall The KICKBACK, HEY ROCCO Aug. 7, Jack Rabbits MAXWELL Aug. 7, Times-Union Center MISTERWIVES Aug. 7, St. Augustine Amphitheatre CANDACE Aug. 9, The Headlamp Outcry Tour: HILLSONG WORSHIP, KARI JOBE, REND COLLECTIVE, HOUSEFIRES, URBAN RESCUE, CHAD VEACH Aug. 10, Veterans Memorial Arena SLIGHTLY STOOPID, SOJA, FORTUNATE YOUTH Aug. 11, St. Augustine Amphitheatre RAY LaMONTAGNE Aug. 14, St. Augustine Amphitheatre KENNY & the JETS Aug. 14, The Headlamp BONEY JAMES Aug. 18, The Florida Theatre SHROUD EATER, DEAD HAND, YASHIRA, SHADOW HUNTER, UNEARTHLY CHILD Aug. 19, Rain Dogs. LYLE LOVETT & HIS LARGE BAND Aug. 20, Florida Theatre TALK SICK BRATS, The MOLD Aug. 24, The Headlamp Sing Out Loud Festival: BRANDI CARLILE, INDIGO GIRLS, BOOKER T. JONES, The TRAVELIN’ McCOURYS, KENNY & the JETS, COLIN HAY, JOEY HARKUM, REV. PEYTON’S BIG DAMN BAND, LUCERO, ADDI & JACQ, JIM & PATTY SPRINGFIELD, CANDLEBOX, COMPLICATED ANIMALS, LONESOME BERT & the SKINNY LIZARDS, The MOUNTAIN GOATS, TIM BARRY, MARCELLUS HALL, SHEA BIRNEY, THIS FRONTIER NEEDS HEROES, WEST KING STRING BAND, JOE ROCCO, The YOUNG STEP, The FREE RANGERS, SHOVELS & ROPE, ROBBIE DAMMIT & the BROKEN STRINGS, NICHOLAS ROBERTS, J. LEE DRISKELL, JACOB HAMILTON, SKIN & BONZ, AMY HENDRICKSON, MIRAH, RIVERNECKS, BAD BOOKS, BOB PATTERSON, DAN ADRIANO, TED LEO, SAM PACETTI, ASLYN & the NAYSAYERS, CORY BRANAN, The WILLOWWACKS, JEREMY ROGERS, FRANK TURNER, HOLOPAW Aug. 26, 27 & 31, Sept. 2, 3, 9 & 10, St. Augustine Amphitheatre, Ponte Vedra Concert Hall, St. Augustine Beach, Ponte Vedra, other venues The ORCHESTRA ELO’s Greatest Hits (members of ELO, Jacksonville Symphony Orchestra) Aug. 27, Florida Theatre
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LIVE + LOCAL MUSIC ZZ TOP Nov. 5, St. Augustine Amphitheatre CHRIS YOUNG, CASSADEE POPE Nov. 12, St. Aug Amphitheatre WAR Nov. 13, Ponte Vedra Concert Hall SAVION GLOVER Nov. 18, The Florida Theatre YELLOWCARD Nov. 18, Mavericks Live WVRM FEST 4 Nov. 18 & 19, 1904 Music Hall MANNHEIM STEAMROLLER Nov. 21, T-U Center ANIMAL COLLECTIVE Nov. 22, Mavericks Live QUEENSRYCHE, ARMORED SAINT Nov. 29, Mavericks Live PATRICK BARTLEY Dec. 1, Ritz Theatre STANLEY CLARKE Dec. 2, Ponte Vedra Concert Hall GARRISON KEILLOR; A PETER WHITE CHRISTMAS: RICK BRAUN, EUGE GROOVE Dec. 11, The Florida Theatre The OAK RIDGE BOYS Dec. 13, The Florida Theatre GRIFFIN HOUSE Dec. 18, Café Eleven JEANNE ROBERTSON Jan. 21, The Florida Theatre KENNY ROGERS, LINDA DAVIS Jan. 28, Thrasher-Horne Center CHRISTIE DASHIELL Feb. 2, Ritz Theatre The BABES Feb. 11, Ponte Vedra Concert Hall COLIN HAY Feb. 22, Ponte Vedra Concert Hall The WEIGHT (with members of The Band) March 3, Ponte Vedra Concert Hall
Joint Committee: Reggae band SCHOLAR’S WORD (pictured) performs with WHITE ABBOTT and JAH ELECT SELTZA July 10 at Harmonious Monks, Jax Beach. WAYNE BRADY Aug. 27, Thrasher-Horne Center for the Arts Kings & Queens of Hip Hop: DMX, BONE THUGS-N-HARMONY, TRINA, JUVENILE, SCARFACE, BIGGA RANKIN, MIKE JONES, KHIA, WAYNE WONDE Aug. 27, Vets Memorial Arena JILL SCOTT Aug. 28, T-U Center for the Performing Arts GOO GOO DOLLS, COLLECTIVE SOUL, TRIBE SOCIETY Aug. 31, St. Augustine Amphitheatre KENNY G Sept. 1, The Florida Theatre TONY JOE WHITE Sept. 2, Ponte Vedra Concert Hall HEPATAGUA Sept. 5, Shantytown Pub MELVINS Sept. 8, Jack Rabbits BRIAN WILSON, AL JARDINE, BLONDIE CHAPLIN Sept. 10, St. Augustine Amphitheatre JAKE SHIMABUKURO Sept. 15, Ponte Vedra Concert Hall ZAC BROWN BAND, DRAKE WHITE & the BIG FIRE Sept. 17, Veterans Memorial Arena IL DIVO Sept. 23, The Florida Theatre WIDESPREAD PANIC Sept. 23 & 24, St. Augustine Amphitheatre SOFIJA KNEZEVIC Sept. 23, Ritz Theatre JONNY LANG Sept. 30, The Florida Theatre GEORGE THOROGOOD & the DESTROYERS Oct. 6, Florida Theatre 1964 the TRIBUTE Oct. 9, The Florida Theatre KORN, BREAKING BENJAMIN Oct. 12, Vets Memorial Arena DONNA the BUFFALO, PETER ROWAN BLUEGRASS
LIVE MUSIC CLUBS
AMELIA ISLAND, FERNANDINA
BAND, BLUEGROUND UNDERGRASS Oct. 13-16, Suwannee Music Park NEEDTOBREATHE, MAT KEARNY, PARACHUTE, WELSHLY ARMS Oct. 13, St. Augustine Amphitheatre Jacksonville Music Fest: MAZE, FRANKIE BEVERLY, JAHEIM, JOE Oct. 14, Veterans Memorial Arena Beaches Oktoberfest: BLUES TRAVELER, COLLIE BUDDZ, The MOVEMENT Oct. 14-16, SeaWalk Pavilion, Jax Beach Live Original Tour: SADIE ROBERTSON Oct. 14, Florida Theatre 20th Annual Magnolia Fest: JJ GREY & MOFRO, The INFAMOUS STRINGDUSTERS, KELLER WILLIAMS, ZACH DEPUTY, BILLY BRAGG, SARAH LEE GUTHRIE, THIS FRONTIER NEEDS HEROES Oct. 15, St. Augustine Amphitheatre KIM RICHEY Oct. 16, Café Eleven KEB’ MO’ BAND Oct. 18, The Florida Theatre The AVETT BROTHERS Oct. 28, Veterans Memorial Arena SCOTT BRADLEE’S POSTMODERN JUKEBOX Oct. 16, The Florida Theatre BONNIE RAITT Oct. 29, St. Augustine Amphitheatre DEPARTMENT of CORRECTION, DIE CHOKING Oct. 29, Rain Dogs. LORD ALMIGHTY Nov. 3, Shantytown Pub GHOST, POPESTAR Nov. 4, The Florida Theatre BLAIR CRIMMINS & the HOOKERS Nov. 5, Café Eleven
ALLEY CAT BEER HOUSE, 316 Centre St., 491-1001 Dan Voll 6:30 p.m. July 6. Gitlo Lee 6:30 p.m. July 8 LA MANCHA, 2709 Sadler Rd., 261-4646 Miguel Paley jazz show 5:30-9 p.m. every Fri.-Sun. Javier Parez every Sun. SLIDERS Seaside Grill, 1998 S. Fletcher Ave., 277-6652 King Eddie & Pili Pili 6 p.m. July 6 & 13. Tad Jennings July 7. Jared Bell, DJ Dave July 8. Mark O’Quinn, Radio Love, Davis Turner July 9. Down Yonder July 10. Darrell Rae July 11. South Mouth July 12 SURF Restaurant, 3199 S. Fletcher Ave., 261-5711 Russell Bryant July 6 & 8. Larry & the Backtracks July 10. Yancy Clegg every Tue. & Thur. Black Jack Band every Fri.
AVONDALE, ORTEGA
CASBAH Café, 3628 St. Johns Ave., 981-9966 Goliath Flores every Wed. Live jazz every Sun. Live music every Mon. ECLIPSE, 4219 St. Johns Ave. KJ Free 9 p.m. Tue. & Thur. Indie dance 9 p.m. every Wed. ’80s & ’90s dance every Fri.
THE BEACHES (All venues in Jax Beach unless otherwise noted)
BLUE WATER Island Grill, 205 First St. N., 249-0083 Dank 10 p.m. July 12. Live music most nights after 10 p.m. BRASS ANCHOR Pub, 2292 Mayport Rd., Atlantic Beach, 249-0301 Joe Oliff July 6. Anton LaPlume Band July 9 The BRIX Taphouse, 300 Second St. N., 241-4668 Yamadeo 7 p.m. July 7. Live music Tue. & Wed. Barrett Jockers Fri. CULHANE’S Irish Pub, 967 Atlantic Blvd., AB, 249-9595 DJ Hal every Sat. Irish music every Sun. FLYING IGUANA, 207 Atlantic Blvd., Neptune Beach, 853-5680 3 the Band 9 p.m. July 7. Chuck Nash 10 p.m. July 8 & 9. Darren Corlew 8:30 p.m. July 10 GUSTO, 1266 Beach Blvd., 372-9925 Italian music 7:30 p.m. July 7. Groov 7:30 p.m. every Wed. Murray Goff 7:30 p.m. every Fri. Under the Bus 7:30 p.m. every Sat. Gene Nordan 6 p.m. Sun. HARMONIOUS Monks, 320 First St. N., 372-0815 Scholar’s Word, White Abbott, Jah Elect Seltza 9:30 p.m. July 10. Jasmine Cain July 13 LYNCH’S Irish Pub, 514 N. First St., 249-5181 Grit 10 p.m. July 8. The Good Bad Kids 10 p.m. July 9. Chillula every Sun. MELLOW MUSHROOM, 1018 Third St. N., 241-5600 Bonnie Blue July 7. Ryan Crary July 8 MEZZA Restaurant & Bar, 110 First St., NB, 249-5573 Ginger every Wed. Mike Shackelford, Steve Shanholtzer every Thur. MONKEY’S UNCLE Tavern, 1728 N. Third St., 246-1070 DJ Wed., Sat. & Sun. Live music Fri. RAGTIME Tavern, 207 Atlantic Blvd., AB, 241-7877 July 6. July 7. July 8. July 9. July 10. July 11. Live music every Wed.-Sun. SEACHASERS, 831 First St. N., 372-0444 Savannah Leigh Bassett 7 p.m. July 13 SLIDERS, 218 First St., NB, 246-0881 Billy Bowers 6:30 p.m. July 8. Bill Ricci July 9. Live music every Wed.-Sun. ZETA Brewing, 131 First Ave. N., 372-0727 Trev Barnes 6 p.m. July 7. Live music every Fri. & Sat.
DOWNTOWN
1904 MUSIC HALL, 19 Ocean St. N. Groove Orient, Lucidea, The Groove Orient, Cave Dwellers, Universal Green, Dialectable Beats vs. Infader, Triclops I July 6. Colombo, DJ D-Extreme, DJ Rob-E, Lab3 & Ofay, Mekanized Source, Wali Sadeq, Albert Adkins 8 p.m. July 8. The Nixon Tapes, Boysin, Fernway, Divorce Culture 6 p.m. July 9 DOS GATOS, 123 E. Forsyth St., 354-0666 BlackJack Wed. DJ Brandon Thur. DJs spin dance music Fri. DJ NickFresh every Sat. DJ Randall every Mon. DJ Hollywood every Tue. FIONN MacCOOL’S, The Landing, 374-1247 Spade McQuade 6 p.m. July 6 & 8 p.m. Ace Winn July 8 HOURGLASS Pub, 345 E. Bay St., 469-1719 Pixelated 9 p.m. July 9. Tom Bennett Band 4 p.m. July 10. Bay Street Jam every Fri. JACKSONVILLE Landing, 353-1188 Conch Fritters 6 p.m. July 6. Radio Love July 8. Live music most weekends MARK’S Downtown, 315 E. Bay St., 355-5099 DJ Dr. Doom 10 p.m. every Fri. DJ Shotgun 10 p.m. every Sat. MAVERICKS LIVE, Jax Landing, 356-1110 Stitches, Askmeificare 8 p.m. July 8. Joe Buck, DJ Justin every Thur.-Sat.
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LIVE + LOCAL MUSIC MYTH Nightclub & Bar, 333 E. Bay St., 707-0474 Buku 7 p.m. July 7. DJ Q45, live music every Wed. EDM every Thur. Eric Rush every Fri. DJ IBay every Sat. Bangarang & Crunchay every Sun.
FLEMING ISLAND
MELLOW MUSHROOM, 1800 Town Ctr. Blvd., 541-1999 Live music most weekends WHITEY’S Fish Camp, 2032 C.R. 220, 269-4198 Reggie Lee 9 p.m. July 7. Dixie Highway 9 p.m. July 8. Conch Fritters 5 p.m., X-Hale 9 p.m. July 9
INTRACOASTAL WEST
CLIFF’S BAR, 3033 Monument Rd., 645-5162 Comfort Zone July 8. Lift July 9. Live music most weekends JERRY’S Grille, 13170 Atlantic Blvd., 220-6766 Boogie Freaks 7:30 p.m. July 8. Hard to Handle 7:30 p.m. July 9
MANDARIN
IGGY’S SEAFOOD SHACK, 104 Bartram Oaks Walk, Ste. 101, 209-5209 Robert Brown Jr. the Confluent 6 p.m. July 7. Live music most weekends MONKEY’S UNCLE, 10503 San Jose, Ste. 15, 260-1349 Live music most weekends
ORANGE PARK, MIDDLEBURG
The HILLTOP, 2030 Wells Rd., 272-5959 John Michael every Tue.-Sat. MR. CHUBBY’S, 11043 Crystal Springs Rd., 355-9464 Robert Brown Jr. the Confluent 9 p.m. July 8 The ROADHOUSE, 231 Blanding Blvd., 264-0611 Clinton Layne Darnell July 6. DJ Big Mike July 7. Five40 10 p.m. July 8. Flag on Fire, Appalachian Death Trap, Coughin’ 10 p.m. July 9 SHARK CLUB, 714 Park Ave., 215-1557 Digital Skyline 9 p.m. July 6
PONTE VEDRA
PUSSER’S, 816 A1A, 280-7766 Live music most weekends TABLE 1, 330 A1A, 280-5515 Deron Baker 6 p.m. July 6. Gary Starling Jazz Band 7:30 p.m. July 7. Wes Cobb July 8. Robbie Litt July 9
RIVERSIDE, WESTSIDE
ACROSS THE STREET, 948 Edgewood Ave. S., 683-4182 Axiom, Blood Bath & Beyond July 9 DERBY on PARK, 1068 Park St., 379-3343 Live music most weekends MURRAY HILL Theatre, 932 Edgewood Ave. S., 388-7807 Freddy Rosario & Friends 7 p.m. July 9 RAIN Dogs, 1045 Park, 379-4969 Hollow Leg, Yashira, Ether, Rhythm of Fear, Shadow Hunter, Meatwound 8 p.m. July 8
BRUSHES WITH
GREATNESS
BEEN AD BEN ADKI ADKINS KINS KI NS IIS S A DR DRUM DRUMMER’S RUM UMM MER’ MER’ ME R S DRUMMER. DRUM DR UMME UM MER ME R. NOT the kind who blows chops to impress his fellow musicians. And not the kind who puts out a solo record so he can make himself the center of attention. (Look, drummers have fragile egos. All those years backing people up make them crave the spotlight. They’re wont to do silly things, like when Tommy Lee thought he could become a lead singer. Remember that?) On his debut solo release, Adkins has created an ensemble outing and included the best players he could get his hands on. On Salmagundi, Adkins brought in local heavies Alphonso Horne (trumpet), Joshua Bowlus (keys), Paul Miller (guitar), Stan Piper (bass) and a few others to perform both original and standards in a largely rad-jazz format. Do the players blow chops? Of course they do. But only at the right time in the context of the music, which makes Salmagundi a pleasure for both musician and non-musician alike. Folio Weekly Magazine recently spoke with drummer and bandleader Adkins about brushes, hurdles, and his take on the state of traditional jazz in the youth-driven Internet age.
RIVERSIDE Arts Market, 715 Riverside Ave., 389-2449 Chasing Jonah, Al Poindexter, Collapsible B, Joey Kerr 10:30 a.m. July 9 TOM & BETTY’S, 4409 Roosevelt Blvd., 387-3311 4syTe, Chelle Wilson 7 p.m. July 8
ST. AUGUSTINE
The CELLAR Upstairs, 157 King St., 826-1594 Beautiful Bobby Blackmon & the B3 Blues Band July 9. Vinny Jacobs 2 p.m. July 10 CRUISERS GRILL, 3 St. George St., 824-6993 Denny Blue 4 p.m. July 8 MARDI GRAS, 123 San Marco Ave., 823-8806 Danger Mouse 9 p.m. July 8. DJ Rob St. John every Wed. Live music Fri. & Sat. PLANET SARBEZ, 115 Anastasia Blvd., 342-0632 Comrades, Withered Bones, Vagabonds, Ema & the Old Kings, Zaftigk 6 p.m. July 10 TRADEWINDS Lounge, 124 Charlotte St., 829-9336 Those Guys 9 p.m. July 8 & 9
Northeast Florida singer-songwriter MARK WILLIAMS performs July 9 at Mudville Music Room, St. Nicholas.
SAN MARCO, SOUTHBANK
JACK RABBITS, 1528 Hendricks Ave., 398-7496 The Good Wood Band, Anton LaPlume Band 8 p.m. July 8. Meade Ave., Dark Summer, The Prescription 8 p.m. July 9. Impact/Hangman, Dope Fiend, Malicious Wounding, Mental Violence, Guttwrench 7 p.m. July 10. A March Through May, My Crimson Wish, Corrupted Saints 7 p.m. July 11. Razors Edge, Too Phucks 7 p.m. July 13 MUDVILLE Music Room, 3104 Atlantic Blvd., 352-7008 Mark Williams 7:30 p.m. July 9. Susan Daly, Elle Rohrer July 14
SOUTHSIDE, BAYMEADOWS
MELLOW MUSHROOM, 9734 Deer Lake Ct., Ste. 1, 997-1955 Ciaran Sontag July 8 UNCLE MADDIO’S, 8221 Southside Blvd., 527-8605 Live music most weekends WHISKEY JAX, 10915 Baymeadows Rd., 634-7208 Shayne Rammler July 6. Bill Ricci 8 p.m. July 12. Melissa Smith’s open mic Wed. Blues jam Sun. Live music every weekend WORLD OF BEER, 9700 Deer Lake Ct.,, 551-5929 DiCarlo Thompson 2 p.m. July 9. Live music most weekends
SPRINGFIELD, NORTHSIDE
THE HEADLAMP, 818 Clay St. The Nots, The Mold, Fever Hands 8 p.m. July 10. Pulsewidthmod, Severed+Said, Omebi 8 p.m. July 12 KNUCKLEHEADS Bar, 850532 U.S. 17, 222-2380 Milltown Road July 9 SHANTYTOWN PUB, 22 W. Sixth St., 798-8222 Oryx, Unearthly Child, Cat Army 8 p.m. July 10. El Escapado, Mr. Never & the Scars, Speedbag Residue 9 p.m. July 11 TONY’S KITCHEN, 2467 Faye Rd., 683-5044 Bandontherun, Rusted Diamond July 8. Rusted Diamond 9 p.m. July 9 List your band’s gig: send time, date, location (street address, city), admission price, contact number to print to Daniel A. Brown, email dbrown@folioweekly.com or 45 W. Bay St., Ste. 103, Jacksonville FL 32202. Events run on a space-available basis. Deadline noon Wed. for next Wednesday’s publication.
tunes were far from complete before the rest of the band added ideas on how to improve things. So really everyone on this record has some skin in the game. Who are your influences as a drummer? More wide-ranging, who influenced you musically? That’s a difficult question to answer. As a drummer, my influences are very wide-ranging, but mostly come from the traditional jazz genre. Jimmy Cobb, Max Roach, Ben Riley, Elvin Jones, Tony Williams, Vernel Fournier and, more modernly, Johnny Vidacovich, Bill Stewart, and Brian Blade. My brother, Chris, is an excellent guitarist and writer himself – he wrote and plays on track six [“That Jambalaya”]. We grew up playing music together, and naturally through him I heard a lot of guitar records: Wes Montgomery, John Scofield, Jim Hall, Pat Metheny, and Wayne Krantz. I suppose I’ve had a lot of musical influences from them, and naturally gravitated to many of the drummers they worked with.
Is there still a market for this kind of jazz? I suppose that depends on how one defines success. In the traditional sense of a music market, maybe not. At the same time, I’d also say there is a decent population of people who enjoy good music, even jazz specifically, and will buy tickets and records and support musicians. To me, this project is more of a chance to get Ben Adkins officially releases my own voice out, a chance SALMAGUNDI at 8 p.m. July 8 at The to do it my way. It’s certainly Parlour (behind Grape & Grain Exchange) more work to get it out there, in San Marco (parlourjax.com). but with that comes more First set tickets ($20, CD included) satisfaction once it pays off. are almost soldout;
Folio Weekly Magazine: The original songs on the record – who wrote those? Ben Adkins: It’s hard to pin all of the credit to any one person. Most of the ideas originated over the course of there are some on benadkinsmusic.com. How do you persuade a several years, as riffs stuck in The second set, 9:30 p.m., has no cover. new audience to listen in my head. I would sometimes a world of downloads of hum them in the shower, or really shitty pop music? hear the next phrase in the middle of the night. That can be a tough one. In my heart, I believe the Once a concrete idea was formed, the rest was music has to stand on its own to some degree, filling in gaps and expanding upon the idea. This meaning there’s a lot of selfish music out there often included longtime musical partner of mine that doesn’t connect with audiences. My goal is to — and chordal genius — Joshua Bowlus. Still, the
find that middle ground where the audience finds it to be catchy, but the musicians aren’t bored. It’s a fine line to straddle, but if you can pull it off, it’s just a matter of finding the right channels to get it out there in the first place. What is the biggest hurdle you had to cross putting together this record? This being the first project I’ve produced, I was overwhelmed by how much paperwork and red tape there was on the business end – licensing, copyrighting, logistics, registering as a publisher, etc. I wish I could afford to just hire somebody to do it all, but that would cost a small fortune. Where can we get the new CD? Preorders are on Amazon and it’ll be available on CDBaby, iTunes, Google Play, Spotify, iHeartRadio, and more. John E. Citrone mail@folioweekly.com
JULY 6 - 12, 2016 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | 29
FOLIO DINING AMELIA ISLAND, FERNANDINA BEACH
BEACH DINER, 2006 S. Eighth St., 310-3750, beachdiner. com. Newest in the popular local chain. Innovative breakfast: Eggs on the Bayou, fish-n-grits; French toast, riders, omelets. Lunch fare: salads, burgers, sandwiches, shrimp & crabmeat salad. $ K TO B L Daily BRETT’S WATERWAY CAFÉ, 1 S. Front St., 261-2660. F Southern hospitality, upscale waterfront spot; daily specials, fresh local seafood, aged beef. $$$ FB L D Daily BURLINGAME RESTAURANT, 20 S. Fifth St., 432-7671, burlingamerestaurant.com. The menu at the fine dining place changes quarterly, focusing on elegantly prepared dishes (8 apps, 8 mains) made with quality seasonal ingredients. Duck confit, grilled pork chops. $$$ BW D Tu-Sa CAFÉ KARIBO, 27 N. Third St., 277-5269, cafekaribo. com. F Family-owned; historic building. Veggie burgers, seafood, made-from-scratch dressings, sauces, desserts. Dine in or on oak-shaded patio. Karibrew Pub next door. $$ FB K TO R, Su; L Daily, D Tu-Su in season CHEZ LEZAN BAKERY CO., 1014 Atlantic Ave., 491-4663, chezlezanbakery.com. Fresh European-style breads, pastries: croissants, muffins, cakes, pies. $ TO B R L Daily The CRAB TRAP, 31 N. Second St., 261-4749, ameliacrab trap.com. F 37 years, family-owned-and-operated. Fresh local seafood, steaks, specials. HH. $$ FB L D Daily GILBERT’S Underground Kitchen, 510 S. Eighth St., 310-6374, undergroundkitchen.com. Chef Kenny Gilbert (Top Chef) serves Deep Southern American cuisine. Dine inside or on a patio. $$ BW K TO L F; D W-Sa & M; R Su HOLA CUBAN CAFÉ, 117 Centre St., 321-0163, holacuban
cheeses, confits, charcuteries, wines. $$ BW B L D M-Sa PI INFINITE COMBINATIONS, 19 S. Third St., 432-8535, pi32034.wix.com/piinfinite. All bar service, NYC-style. Specialty pizzas, pie/slice, toppings: truffle mushrooms, little neck clams, eggs, shrimp. Courtyard. $$ BW TO L D W-Su The SALTY PELICAN Bar & Grill, 12 N. Front St., 277-3811, thesaltypelicanamelia.com. F 2015 BOJ winner. 2nd-story outdoor bar. Owners T.J. & Al offer local seafood, fish tacos, Mayport shrimp, po’boys, cheese oysters. $$ FB K L D Daily The SAVORY MARKET, 474380 E. S.R. 200, 432-8551. Local, organic produce, wild-caught seafood – Mayport shrimp – Wainwright meats, raw dairy, deli. Café has salads, hand-helds, tacos. $$ TO M-Sa SLIDERS Seaside Grill, 1998 S. Fletcher Ave., 277-6652, slidersseaside.com. F Oceanfront. Crabcakes, fried pickles, fresh seafood. Open-air 2nd floor, balcony. $$ FB K L D Daily T-RAY’S Burger Station, 202 S. Eighth St., 261-6310. F 2015 BOJ winner. Family-owned-and-operated 18+ years. Blue plate specials, burgers, biscuits & gravy, shrimp. $ BW TO B L M-Sa
ARLINGTON, REGENCY
LARRY’S GIANT SUBS, 1301 Monument Rd., Ste. 5, 724-5802. F SEE ORANGE PARK.
AVONDALE, ORTEGA
FLORIDA CREAMERY, 3566 St. Johns Ave., 619-5386. Ice cream, waffle cones, milkshakes, sundaes, Nathan’s grilled hot dogs. Low-fat, sugar-free choices. $ K TO L D Daily HARPOON LOUIE’S, 4070 Herschel St., Ste. 8, 389-5631, harpoonlouies.net. F Locally owned & operated 20+
BITE-SIZED Uptown Scratch Kitchen PINT-SIZED Shandy Sips GRILL ME! Flying Iguana CHEFFED-UP Buttercream Frosting
P. 31 P. 32 P. 32 P. 33
chicken, vegan black bean burgers. HH. $$ BW L M-F; D Tu-Sa ZESTY INDIA, 8358 Point Meadows Dr., 329-3676, zesty india.com. Chefs blend Asian methodology with European template. Tandoori lamb chops, rosemary tikka. Vegetarian items cooked separately in vegetable oil. Lunch platters. $ BW TO L D Tu-Su
BEACHES
(Venues are in Jax Beach unless otherwise noted.)
AL’S PIZZA, 303 Atlantic Blvd., Atlantic Beach, 2490002, alspizza.com. F 2015 BOJ winner. New York-style gourmet pizzas, baked dishes 28+ years. All-day HH M-Thu. $ FB K TO L D Daily EUROPEAN STREET CAFÉ, 992 Beach Blvd., 249-3001, europeanstreet.com. F 2015 BOJ winner. SEE RIVERSIDE. FLYING IGUANA TAQUERIA & Tequila Bar, 207 Atlantic Blvd., Neptune Beach, 853-5680 F 2015 BOJ winner. Latin American, tacos, seafood, carnitas, Cubana fare. 100+ tequilas. $ FB L D Daily GUSTO, 1266 Beach Blvd., 372-9925, gustojax.com. Classic Old World Roman cuisine, large Italian menu: homestyle pasta, beef, chicken, fish delicacies; open pizza-tossing kitchen. Reservations encouraged. $$ FB TO D Nightly HARMONIOUS MONKS, 320 First St. N., 372-0815. American-style steakhouse, filets, gourmet burgers, ribs, wraps, sandwiches. $$ FB K L D M-Sa LARRY’S GIANT SUBS, 657 Third St. N., 247-9620. F SEE ORANGE PARK.
MELLOW MUSHROOM PIZZA BAKERS, 1018 Third St. N., Ste. 2, 241-5600, mellowmushroom.com. F Bite Club. 2015 BOJ winner. Hoagies, gourmet pizzas: Mighty Meaty, vegetarian, Kosmic Karma. 35 tap beers. Nonstop HH. $ BW K TO L D Daily METRO DINER, 1534 Third St. N., 853-6817. F 2015 BOJ
winner. SEE SAN MARCO. MEZZA Restaurant & Bar, 110 First St., NB, 249-5573,
From tasty pies to fresh salads with a healthful twist, there’s something on the menu you’re craving at any of Al’s Pizza’s many locations throughout Northeast Florida. photo by Dennis Ho cafe.com. F Behind Palace Saloon; owned by real Cubans; authentic sandwiches, coffee. Dine in or out at umbrella tables. $$ FB K TO R, Su; L D Daily HORIZONS, 5472 First Coast Hwy., 321-2430, horizons ameliaisland.com. Fine dining, upscale setting. Gourmet fare, seafood, steaks, lamb, pasta. $$$ FB L D Tu-Sa JACK & DIANE’S, 708 Centre St., 321-1444, jackanddian escafe.com. F 1887 shotgun house. Jambalaya, French toast, mac-n-cheese, crêpes, vegan/vegetarian. Dine in or on a porch. $$ FB K B L D Daily LA MANCHA, 2709 Sadler Rd., 261-4646. Spanish/ Portuguese cuisine with a Brazilian flair. Tapas, seafood, steaks, homemade sangria. Drink specials. AYCE paella Sunday. $$$ FB K TO D Nightly MOON RIVER PIZZA, 925 S. 14th St., 321-3400, moonriver pizza.net. F 2015 BOJ winner. Authentic Northern-style pizzas, 20+ toppings, pie or slice. $ BW TO L D M-Sa The MUSTARD SEED CAFÉ, 833 Courson Rd., 277-3141, nassaushealthfoods.net. Casual organic eatery, juice bar, in Nassau Health Foods. All-natural organic items, smoothies, herbal tea, daily specials. $$ TO B L M-Sa PABLO’S Mexican Restaurant Grill & Cantina, 12 N. Second St., 261-0049. Chicken, carnes, fajitas, burritos, tacos, daily specials, vegetarian. $$ FB K TO L D Daily The PECAN ROLL BAKERY, 122 S. Eighth St., 491-9815, thepecanrollbakery.com. F Near historic district. Sweet and savory pastries, cookies, cakes, bagels, breads; made from scratch. $ TO B L W-Su The PICNIC BASKET, 503-A Centre St., 277-9779, picnic basketfernandina.com. Small shop focuses on fresh fare, To list your restaurant, call your account manager or Sam Taylor, 860-2465 • staylor@folioweekly.com
DINING DIRECTORY KEY
AVERAGE ENTRÉE • COST •
$ = Less than $10 $$ = $10- $20 $$$ = $20- $35 $$$$ = $35 & up BW = Beer/Wine FB = Full Bar K = Kids’ Menu TO = Take Out B = Breakfast R = Brunch L = Lunch D = Dinner Bite Club = Hosted free FW Bite Club event. fwbiteclub.com 2015 Best of Jax winner F = FW distribution spot
30 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | JULY 6 - 12, 2016
years. American pub. 1/2-lb. burgers, fish sandwiches, pasta. Local beers, HH. $$ FB K TO L D Daily MELLOW MUSHROOM Pizza Bakers, 3611 St. Johns Ave., 388-0200. F Bite Club. 2015 BOJ winner. SEE BEACHES. PINEGROVE Market & Deli, 1511 PineGrove Ave., 389-8655, pinegrovemarket.com. F 2015 BOJ winner. 40+ years. Burgers, Cubans, subs, wraps. Onsite butcher cuts USDA choice prime aged beef. Craft beers. $ BW TO B L D M-Sa RESTAURANT ORSAY, 3630 Park St., 381-0909, restaur antorsay.com. 2015 BOJ winner. French/Southern bistro; local organic ingredients. Steak frites, mussels, pork chops. Snail of Approval. $$$ FB R, Su; D Nightly SIMPLY SARA’S, 2902 Corinthian Ave., 387-1000, simply saras.net. F Down-home fare from scratch: eggplant fries, pimento cheese, baked chicken, fruit cobblers, chicken & dumplings, desserts. BYOB. $$ K TO L D M-Sa, B Sa
BAYMEADOWS
AL’S PIZZA, 8060 Philips Hwy., Ste. 105, 731-4300. F 2015 BOJ winner. SEE BEACHES.
INDIA’S Restaurant, 9802 Baymeadows Rd., Ste. 8, 620-0777, indiajax.com. F 2015 BOJ winner. Authentic cuisine, lunch buffet. Curries, vegetables, lamb, chicken, shrimp, fish tandoori. $$ BW L M-Sa; D Nightly LARRY’S Subs, 3928 Baymeadows Rd., Ste. 9, 737-7740. 8616 Baymeadows Rd., 739-2498. F SEE ORANGE PARK. METRO DINER, 9802 Baymeadows Rd., 425-9142. F 2015 BOJ winner. SEE SAN MARCO.
MINT INDIAN Restaurant, 8490 Baymeadows, 367-1821, jaxmint.com. A new style of authentic, traditional Indian cuisine. Daily lunch buffet; HH. $ L D Daily NATIVE SUN Natural Foods Market & Deli, 11030 Baymeadows Rd., 260-2791. SEE MANDARIN. PATTAYA THAI Grille, 9551 Baymeadows Rd., 646-9506, ptgrille.com. Family-owned 26+ years; serving new Thai, traditional, vegetarian; curries, noodles. Low-sodium, glutenfree, too. Open kitchen display. $$$ BW TO L D Tu-Su The WELL WATERING HOLE, 3928 Baymeadows Rd., Ste. 9, 737-7740, thewellwateringhole.com. Local craft beers, glass/bottle wines. Meatloaf sandwich, pulled Peruvian
mezzarestaurantandbar.com. F Near-the-ocean 20+ years. Casual bistro fare: gourmet wood-fired pizzas, nightly specials. Dine in, patio. $$$ FB K D M-Sa MOJO KITCHEN BBQ PIT, 1500 Beach Blvd., 247-6636, mojobbq.com. F 2015 BOJ winner. Pulled pork, beef, chicken, Carolina-style, sides. $$ FB K TO L D Daily M SHACK, 299 Atlantic Blvd., AB, 241-2599, mshack burgers.com. 2015 BOJ winner. David and Matthew Medure flip burgers, hot dogs, fries, shakes, more. Dine inside or out – people-watch at Beaches Town Center. $$ BW L D Daily NATIVE SUN Natural Foods Market & Deli, 1585 Third St. N., 458-1390. SEE BAYMEADOWS. POE’S TAVERN, 363 Atlantic Blvd., AB, 241-7637, poestavern.com. Gastropub, 50+ beers, gourmet burgers, handcut fries, fish tacos, Edgar’s Drunken Chili, daily fish sandwich special. $$ FB K L D Daily RAGTIME TAVERN & SEAFOOD GRILL, 207 Atlantic Blvd., AB, 241-7877, ragtimetavern.com. F 30+ years, iconic seafood place. Blackened snapper, sesame tuna, Ragtime shrimp. Daily HH. $$ FB L D Daily SEACHASERS, 831 First St. N., 372-0444, seachasers.com. New place; four areas: First Street Bar, Music Room, Beach Bar, Dining Room. Daily HH. In or on patio. $$ FB L D Daily SLIDERS SEAFOOD GRILLE & OYSTER BAR, 218 First St., NB, 246-0881, slidersseafoodgrille.com. Beach-casual spot. Faves: Fresh fish tacos, gumbo. Key lime pie, ice cream sandwiches. $$ FB K L Sa/Su; D Nightly SNEAKERS SPORTS GRILLE, 111 Beach Blvd., 482-1000, sneakerssportsgrille.com. 2015 BOJ winner. 20+ tap beers, TVs. HH M-F. $ FB K L D Daily UGLY CUPCAKE MUFFINRY & Cafe, 115 Fifth Ave. S., 339-5214, theuglycupcakemuffinry.com. Sweet/ savory giant muffins, made from organic, locally sourced ingredients. Outside seating. $$ TO B L Daily V PIZZA, 528 First St. N., 853-6633, vpizza.com. This new-ish place specializes in the art of traditional pizza Neapolitana, a rare class of artisan pizza from Naples – Italy, silly, not Florida. $$ FB TO L D Daily
DOWNTOWN
AKEL’S DeliCATESSSEN, 21 W. Church St., 665-7324, akelsdeli.com. 50 N. Laura St., Ste. 125, 446-3119. F New York-style deli. Fresh subs, specialty sandwiches, burgers, gyros, wraps, desserts, vegetarian items. $ TO B L M-F The CANDY APPLE CAFÉ & COCKTAILS, 400 N. Hogan St., 353-9717, thecandyapplecafe.com. Chef-driven cuisine, sandwiches, entrées, salads. HH Tu-F $$ FB K D Tu-Sa CASA DORA, 108 E. Forsyth St., 356-8282. F Chef Sam Hamidi serves Italian fare, 40+ years: veal, seafood, gourmet pizza. Homemade salad dressing. $ BW K L M-F; D M-Sa FIONN MacCOOL’S Irish Pub & Restaurant, Jax Landing, Ste. 176, 374-1547, fionnmacs.com. Casual dining, uptown Irish atmosphere; fish & chips, Guinness lamb stew, black-and-tan brownies. $$ FB K L D Daily FOLKFOOD, 219 N. Hogan St., 333-8392 Southern specialties, coastal cuisine like fried catfish, Florida citrus kale salad, blackened mahi mahi tacos, meatloaf with curry sauce, homestyle desserts made in-house daily. $ BW TO L D M-F INDOCHINE, 21 E. Adams St., Ste. 200, 598-5303, indo chinejax.com. 2015 BOJ winner. Thai, Southeast Asian cuisine. Signature dishes are chicken Satay, soft shell crab; mango, sticky rice dessert. $$ FB TO L D M-F; D Tu-Sa OLIO MARKET, 301 E. Bay St., 356-7100, oliomarket.com. F From-scratch soups, sandwiches. Duck grilled cheese, seen on Best Sandwich in America. $$ BW TO B R L M-F; D F URBAN GRIND Coffee Company, 45 W. Bay St., Ste. 102, 866-395-3954, 516-7799, urbangrind.coffee. Locally roasted whole bean brewed coffees, espressos, pastries, smoothies,
FOLIO DINING : BITE-SIZED
UPTOWN FLAIR IN A
DOWNTOWN TRUCK St. Augustine food truck offers FARE TO SAVOR much breading. That day, it was served ARRIVING AT A SPOT JUST BLOCKS UP FROM bone-in with a choice of fries or onion the Historic District, you may be tempted to rings (“o-rings” on the menu), and a giant stop in at DOS Coffee & Wine, but for the cup of tangy, sweet barbecue sauce. The moment, go left. You’ll run into the Uptown onion rings — made with ridiculously large Scratch Kitchen truck, where chef and owner onions — were piping hot and perfectly Vinny D’Amato creates his magic. cooked; each bite resulted in a fabulous Uptown Scratch Kitchen features daily union of onion and fried goodness. specials along with its regular options — it’s Somehow, Uptown Scratch Kitchen a delightful guessing game to see what’s manages to eliminate the frustrating displayed on the chalkboard menu. scenario of taking a bite that gives up all the On our recent visit, we started with onion and leaves behind a hollow shell and the corn on the cob appetizer ($6) — no onion heart. not something I’d typically order, but The Cuban sandwich ($14) is so big, Chef Vinny is not your typical chef. it would satisfy a growing teenage boy. The appetizer includes six pieces of The sandwich boasts “pork three ways” corn sprinkled with a salad-like mixture of arugula, tomatoes, with shredded lettuce, and tart pineapple and UPTOWN SCRATCH KITCHEN pickles and a generous 300 San Marco Ave., St. Augustine, drizzled with some of spread of mustard and 377-6050, facebook.com/ their signature sauces, fries. Growing up in uptownscratchkitchen like housemade South Florida, I’ve had barbecue sauce. my fair share of Cuban We ordered one of the specials of the sandwiches, and this is by far one of the day, a fried rice dish, with your choice of meatiest I’ve encountered here. The fries protein — like pork belly or shrimp ($14). were exceptional because of the crispy We were excited for fresh seafood, so we rosemary and fried garlic mixed in. went with shrimp. Count ’em — there are a Finding a golden clove of garlic was dozen shrimp. The Thai jasmine fried rice similar to unearthing a diamond, and included roasted garlic, sweet chunks of we treated the experience with just as pineapple, and basil and was topped with much reverence. crispy strips of yuca. The neat thing about Uptown’s is that Grouper was the star in the Fish ’n’ Chips you can get beverages like wine, beer, and ($14) of the day. It had a nice light breading on-tap kombucha inside DOS Coffee & and just enough seasoning to add a pop of Wine, as well as some amazing sweet treats flavor without overpowering the fish. from Créme de la Cocoa. All in one spot. I The Almost Famous Fried Chicken didn’t want to leave! ($13) was battered and fried to ruffle-y Brentley Stead golden brown perfection without too biteclub@folioweekly.com
JULY 6 - 12, 2016 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | 31
DINING DIRECTORY PINT-SIZED
bagels, cream cheeses. Chicken salad (best ever), tuna salad, sandwiches. Free Wi-Fi. $ B L M-F URBAN GRIND Express, 50 W. Laura St., 516-7799. SEE ABOVE. ZODIAC Bar & Grill, 120 W. Adams St., 354-8283, thezodiac barandgrill.com. 16+ years. Mediterranean cuisine, American fare, paninis, vegetarian dishes. Daily lunch buffet. Espressos, hookahs. HH W-Sa $ FB L M-F
FLEMING ISLAND
A SHANDY BY ANY OTHER NAME
IS
A
RADLER
For refreshing SUMMER SIPPING, tuck into a beer cocktail IN ENGLAND, THEY’RE KNOWN AS SHANDIES. In Germany, they call them radlers. Whatever you call them, beer cocktails are catching on all over the world. In England, the shandygaff – or shandy – can be a mix of ale with ginger beer, ginger ale, apple cider, or any other soft drink, as well as any variety of hard cider. Traditionally, though, a shandygaff is beer mixed with ginger beer. In Germany, the ingredients are essentially the same, but the style of beer used is, of course, lager. In both cases, these refreshing mélanges are generally low in alcohol, weighing in at less than 4 percent alcohol by volume. The exact origins are unknown but, according to at least one account, the German version of the light, cooling beverage can be traced to June 1922. At that time of year, the weather in Germany can be very hot and humid, a combination that demands liquid rejuvenation for travelers. Alas, during that hot month, Gasthaus (translation: guest house) owner Franz Xaver Kugler didn’t have enough beer on hand to slake the thirst of the bicyclists – known as radlers – and hikers who were his guests. To solve his problem, Kugler did a quick inventory and discovered he had a lot of lemon-lime soda. In a stroke of genius, he added the soda to the remaining beer and named it for the bicyclists. And so the radler, or radlermass (in German, mass means ‘liter’), was born. In England, the shandy has been around for more than a century. In fact, the shandygaff is mentioned in a comic novel by H.G. Wells, author of sci-fi classic, The War of the Worlds. In The History of Mr. Polly, Wells describes shandygaff as “two bottles of beer mixed with ginger beer in a round-bellied jug.” Variations abound; one of the more popular blends is the “snakebite,” a fusion of beer and cider. Beer mixed with cola is often called a “diesel” in England, and hefeweizen mixed with cola is called a “colaweizen” in Germany. Here in the U.S.A., these bracing summer treats are brewed and distributed by many breweries nationwide. So dust off the rocking chairs on the breezy front porch and relax with a cold shandy as the world slowly turns. The combination is sure to put you in a summer frame of mind. Here are a few shandies and radlers you can find locally.
PINT-SIZED
NARRAGANSETT DEL’S SHANDY Named for an iconic frozen lemonade stand in Rhode Island, this half-beer, half-lemonade brew is just the thing to quench your thirst on a scorching summer afternoon. SCHÖFFERHOFER GRAPEFRUIT This sweet, 50/50 blend of hefeweizen and grapefruit juice weighs in at only 2.5 percent ABV. It’s a perfect accompaniment to a summer brunch, instead of the usual mimosas. ENGINE 15 J’VILLE LEMON SHANDY If beer and lemonade had a beautiful baby, it would be this zesty, fresh concoction of local brewery Engine 15’s J’Ville Lager, lemon juice and some secret ingredients. Marc Wisdom marc@folioweekly.com 32 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | JULY 6 - 12, 2016
GRASSROOTS Natural Market, 1915 East-West Parkway, 541-0009. F 2015 BOJ winner. SEE RIVERSIDE. MELLOW MUSHROOM Pizza Bakers, 1800 Town Ctr. Blvd., 541-1999. F Bite Club. 2015 BOJ winner. SEE BEACHES. TAPS Bar & Grill, 1605 C.R. 220, Ste. 145, 278-9421, tapspublichouse.com. 50+ premium domestic, imported tap beers. Burgers, sandwiches, entrées. $$ FB K L D Daily WHITEY’S FISH CAMP, 2032 C.R. 220, 269-4198, whiteys fishcamp.com. F Real fish camp. Gator tail, freshwater catfish, daily specials, on Swimming Pen Creek. Tiki bar. Come by boat, bike or car. $ FB K TO L Tu-Su; D Nightly
DERBY on PARK, 1068 Park St., 379-3343. New American cuisine, upscale retro in historic landmark building. Shrimp & grits, lobster bites, 10-oz. gourmet burger. Dine inside or out. $$-$$$ FB B L D Tu-Su, R Sa/Su EUROPEAN STREET CAFÉ, 2753 Park St., 384-9999. 2015 BOJ winner. 130+ import beers, 20 on tap. Sandwiches. Outside dining at some EStreets. $ BW K L D Daily GRASSROOTS Natural Market, 2007 Park St., 384-4474, thegrassrootsmarket.com. F 2015 BOJ winner. Juice bar uses certified organic fruits, vegetables. Artisanal cheeses, more than 300 craft, imported beers, 50 organic wines, and organic produce, meats, vitamins, herbs. Organic wraps, sides, sandwiches. $ BW TO B L D Daily HAWKERS Asian Street Fare, 1001 Park St., 508-0342, hawkerstreetfare.com. 2015 BOJ winner. Authentic dishes from mobile stalls. $ BW TO L D Daily HOBNOB, 220 Riverside Ave., Ste. 110, 513-4272, hobnob withus.com. New place serves cuisine driven by global inspirations, local intentions – ahi poke tuna, jumbo lump crab tacos. $$ FB TO L D Brunch Daily
BISTRO AIX, 1440 San Marco Blvd., 398-1949, bistrox. com. F Mediterranean/French inspired; steak frites, oak-fired pizza, raw bar, seasonal selections. HH M-F $$$ FB L D Daily EUROPEAN STREET CAFÉ, 1704 San Marco Blvd., 398-9500. 2015 BOJ winner. SEE RIVERSIDE. $ BW K L D Daily FUSION SUSHI, 1550 University Blvd. W., 636-8688, fusionsushijax.com. F Upscale sushi spot serves fresh sushi, sashimi, hibachi, teriyaki, kiatsu. $$ K L D Daily INDOCHINE, 1974 San Marco Blvd., 503-7013. 2015 BOJ winner. SEE DOWNTOWN.
KITCHEN ON SAN MARCO, 1402 San Marco Blvd., 396-2344, kitchenonsanmarco.com. 2015 BOJ winner. Local, national craft beers, specialty cocktails. A seasonal menu, with fresh, locally sourced ingredients. $$ FB R Su; L D Daily MARDI GRAS SPORTS BAR, 123 San Marco Ave., 347-3288, mardibar.com. Wings, nachos, shrimp, chicken, Phillys, sliders, soft pretzels. $$ FB TO L D Daily METRO DINER, 3302 Hendricks Ave., 398-3701, metro
INTRACOASTAL WEST
AL’S PIZZA, 14286 Beach Blvd., Ste. 31, 223-0991. F 2015 BOJ winner. SEE BEACHES.
LARRY’S GIANT SUBS, 10750 Atlantic Blvd., Ste. 14, 642-6980. F SEE ORANGE PARK. ORANGE TREE Hot Dogs, 3500 Beach, Ste. 43, 551-3661, orangetreehotdogs.com. Hot dogs, personal size pizzas since ’68. Hershey’s ice cream, milkshakes. $ K TO L D Daily SID & LINDA’S Seafood Market & Restaurant, 12220 Atlantic Blvd., Ste. 109, 503-8276. Pick your own whole fresh fish, have it cleaned, filleted, cooked to order. Dine in, take out. Housemade sauces. $$ K TO L D Daily
MANDARIN, NW ST. JOHNS
AKEL’S DELI, 12926 Granbay Pkwy. W., 880-2008. F SEE DOWNTOWN.
AL’S PIZZA, 11190 San Jose Blvd., 260-4115. F 2015 BOJ winner. SEE BEACHES.
ATHENS CAFÉ, 6271 St. Augustine Rd., Ste. 7, 733-1199. F 20+ years. Dolmades (stuffed grape leaves), baby shoes (stuffed eggplant). Greek beers. $$ BW L D M-F; D Sa FIRST COAST Deli & Grill, 6082 St. Augustine Rd., 733-7477. Pancakes, bacon, sandwiches, burgers, wings. $ K TO B L Daily LARRY’S Subs, 11362 San Jose Blvd., Ste. 3, 674-2945. F SEE ORANGE PARK. METRO DINER, 12807 San Jose Blvd., 638-6185. F 2015 BOJ winner. Now dinner nightly. SEE SAN MARCO. NATIVE SUN Natural Foods Market & Deli, 10000 San Jose Blvd., 260-6950, nativesunjax.com. F Organic soups, baked items, sandwiches, prepared foods. Juice, smoothie,coffee bar. All-natural, organic beers, wines. Indoor, outdoor dining. $ BW TO K B L D Daily TAPS Bar & Grill, 2220 C.R. 210 W., Ste. 314, 819-1554. SEE FLEMING ISLAND.
V PIZZA, 12601 San Jose Blvd., 647-9424. SEE SAN MARCO.
ORANGE PARK
The HILLTOP, 2030 Wells Rd., 272-5959, hilltop-club.com. Southern-style fine dining. New Orleans shrimp, certified Black Angus prime rib, she-crab soup, desserts. Extensive bourbon selection. $$$ FB D Tu-Sa LARRY’S GIANT SUBS, 1330 Blanding Blvd., Ste. 165, 276-7370. 1545 C.R. 220, 278-2827. 700 Blanding Blvd., Ste. 15, 272-3553. 5733 Roosevelt Blvd., 446-9500. 1401 S. Orange Ave., Green Cove, 284-7789, larryssubs.com. F All over the area, Larry’s piles ’em high, serves ’em fast; 33+ years. Hot & cold subs, soups. Some Larry’s serve breakfast. $ K TO B L D Daily METRO DINER, 2034 Kingsley Ave., 375-8548. F 2015 BOJ winner. Now dinner nightly. SEE SAN MARCO. PASTA MARKET Italian Restaurant & Clam Bar, 1930 Kingsley Ave., 276-9551, pastamarketitalianrestaurant. com. Family-owned-and-operated. Gourmet pizzas, veal, chicken, mussels, shrimp, grouper. Spaghetti, lasagna, fettuccine, ziti, calzones, linguini, tortellini. $$ BW K D Nightly SNACSHACK, 179 College Dr., Ste. 19, 682-7622, snac shack.menu. F Bakery and café; bagels, muffins, breads, cookies, brownies, snack treats. $$ K BW TO B L D Daily The URBAN BEAN Coffeehouse Café, 2023 Park Ave., 541-4938, theurbanbeancoffeehouse.com. Coffee, espresso, sandwiches, flatbreads, apps. $$ K TO B L D Daily
PONTE VEDRA BEACH
AL’S Pizza, 635 A1A, 543-1494. F 2015 BOJ. SEE BEACHES. LARRY’S Subs, 830 A1A N., Ste. 6, 273-3993. F SEE O. PARK.
RIVERSIDE, 5 PTS, WESTSIDE
13 GYPSIES, 887 Stockton St., 389-0330, 13gypsies.com. 2015 BOJ winner. Authentic Mediterranean peasant cuisine updated for Americans; tapas, blackened octopus, risotto of the day, coconut mango curry chicken. $$ BW L D Tu-Sa AL’S PIZZA, 1620 Margaret St., Ste. 201, 388-8384. F 2015
BOJ winner. SEE BEACHES.
BLACK SHEEP Restaurant, 1534 Oak St., 355-3793, blacksheep5points.com. New American, Southern; local source ingredients. Rooftop bar. $$$ FB R Sa/Su; L D Daily BREW Five Points, 1024 Park St., 714-3402, brewfive points.com. F 2015 BOJ winner. Local craft beer, espresso, coffee, wine. Rotating drafts, 75+ can craft beers; sodas, tea. Waffles, toasts, desserts, coffees. HH. $$ B L Su/M; B L D Tu-Sa COOL MOOSE CAFÉ, 2708 Park St., 381-4242, coolmoose cafe.net. New England-style café; full breakfast menu, classic sandwiches, wraps, soups, brunch all day Sunday. Gourmet coffees. $$ BW R L D Tu-Su CORNER TACO, 818 Post St., 240-0412, cornertaco.com. Made-from-scratch “Mexclectic street food,” tacos, nachos, gluten-free, vegetarian options. $ BW L D Tu-Su
GRILL ME!
ASHANTIE HAKKER
The FLYING IGUANA Taqueria & Tequila Bar
207 Atlantic Blvd., Neptune Beach BORN IN: The Netherlands YEARS IN THE BIZ: 9 FAVE RESTAURANT (other than mine): Mint, Southside FAVE CUISINE STYLE: Indian TASTE TREAT: Lychee martini FAVE INGREDIENTS: Fresh herbs: basil, thyme, cumin IDEAL MEAL: Keeping it simple and fresh: avocado, kale, quinoa and salmon WON'T CROSS MY LIPS: Processed foods INSIDER'S SECRET: Grown your own herbs. It's cost-effective and adds more flavor. CELEBS (@ my place): Blake Bortles IL DESCO, 2665 Park St., 290-6711, ildescojax.com. Modern, authentic Italian cuisine. Handcrafted cocktails. $$-$$$ FB TO K L D Daily JOHNNY’S DELI & GRILLE, 474 Riverside Ave., 356-8055. F Casual; made-to-order sandwiches, wraps, salads, breakfast. $ TO B L M-Sa LARRY’S Subs, 1509 Margaret, 674-2794. 7895 Normandy, 781-7600. 8102 Blanding, 779-1933. F SEE ORANGE PARK.
LITTLE JOE’S CAFÉ by Akel, 245 Riverside Ave., Ste. 195, 791-3336. Riverview café serves soups, salads, signature salad dressings. $ TO B L M-F METRO DINER, 4495 Roosevelt Blvd., 999-4600. F 2015
BOJ winner. SEE SAN MARCO.
MOON RIVER PIZZA, 1176 Edgewood Ave. S., 389-4442. F 2015 BOJ winner. SEE AMELIA ISLAND. MOSSFIRE GRILL, 1537 Margaret St., 355-4434, mossfire.com. F Southwestern fish tacos, chicken enchiladas. HH M-Sa upstairs, all day Su $$ FB K L D Daily M SHACK, 1012 Margaret St., 423-1283. 2015 BOJ winner. SEE BEACHES.
PATTAYA Thai Grille, 1526 King, 503-4060. SEE BAYMEADOWS.
RAIN DOGS, 1045 Park St., 379-4969. 2015 BOJ winner. Bar food. $ D SBRAGA & Company, 220 Riverside Ave., Ste. 114, 746-0909, sbragadining.com. Chef Kevin Sbraga has a contemporary culinary approach to local influences. Go-to dishes: hog & hominy, fish fry, carrot ceviche. $$-$$$ FB TO L D Daily SOUTHERN ROOTS Filling Station, 1275 King St., 513-4726, southernrootsjax.com. 2015 BOJ winner. Healthy, light vegan fare; local, organic ingredients. Specials, on bread, local greens or rice, change daily. Coffees, teas. $ Tu-Su SUSHI CAFÉ, 2025 Riverside, Ste. 204, 384-2888, sushi cafejax.com. F Monster, Rock-n-Roll, Dynamite Roll. Hibachi, tempura, katsu, teriyaki. $$ BW L D Daily TIMOTI’S SEAFOOD SHAK, 1043 Park St., 374-8892. Brand new. SEE AMELIA ISLAND.
ST. AUGUSTINE
AL’S PIZZA, 1 St. George St., 824-4383. F 2015 BOJ winner. SEE BEACHES.
The FLORIDIAN, 72 Spanish St., 829-0655, thefloridian staug.com. 2015 BOJ winner. Updated Southern fare. Vegetarian, gluten-free. Fried green tomato bruschetta; grits with shrimp, fish or tofu. $$$ BW K TO L D W-M GYPSY CAB COMPANY, 828 Anastasia Blvd., 824-8244, gypsycab.com. F Local mainstay 25+ years. Varied menu changes twice daily. Signature dish: Gypsy chicken. Seafood, tofu, duck, veal. $$ FB R Su; L D Daily MELLOW MUSHROOM PIZZA BAKERS, 410 Anastasia Blvd., 826-4040. F Bite Club. 2015 BOJ winner. SEE BEACHES. METRO DINER, 1000 S. Ponce de Leon Blvd., 758-3323. F 2015 BOJ winner. Now dinner nightly. SEE SAN MARCO. ONE TWENTY THREE Burger House, 123 King St., 687-2790. From Carmelo’s owners. Premium burgers, made with beef from NYC butcher Schweid & Sons. Woodfired pizzas, ice cream bar, Old World milkshakes. $$ BW K TO L D Daily
SAN MARCO, SOUTHBANK
BASIL Thai & Sushi, 1004 Hendricks Ave., 674-0190, basilthaijax.com. F Authentic Pad Thai, curry, tempura, vegetarian, seafood, stir-fry, specials. HH. $$ FB L D M-Sa
diner.com. F 2015 BOJ winner. Original upscale diner.
Meatloaf, chicken pot pie, soups. This Metro serves dinner nightly. $$ B R L Daily PIZZA PALACE, 1959 San Marco Blvd., 399-8815, pizza palacejax.com. F Family-owned-&-operated; spinach pizza, chicken spinach calzones, ravioli, lasagna. Dine outside. HH. $$ BW K TO L D Daily TAVERNA, 1986 San Marco Blvd., 398-3005, tavernasan marco.com. Chef Sam Efron’s authentic Italian; local produce, meats, tapas, wod-fired pizza. Craft beers & cocktails. $$$ FB K TO R L D Daily V PIZZA, 1406 Hendricks Ave., 527-1511, vpizza.com. True Neapolitana pizzas with the freshest ingredients. They claim a 55-second cook time – put them to the test. $$ FB L D Daily
SOUTHSIDE, TINSELTOWN
ALHAMBRA THEATRE & DINING, 12000 Beach Blvd., 641-1212, alhambrajax.com. USA’s longest-running dinner theater; Chef DeJuan Roy’s themed menus. Reservations. $$ FB D Tu-Su The CHATTY CRAB, 9041 Southside Blvd., Ste. 138C, 888-0639, chattycrab.com. Chef Dana Pollard’s raw oysters, Nawlins-style low country boil, po’ boys, 50¢ wing specials. $$ FB K TO L D Daily EUROPEAN STREET CAFÉ, 5500 Beach Blvd., 398-1717.
2015 BOJ winner. SEE RIVERSIDE.
GREEK STREET CAFÉ, 3546 St. Johns Bluff Rd. S., Ste. 106, 503-0620, greekstreetcafe.com. Fresh, authentic, modern fare; Greek owners. Gyros, spanakopita, dolmades, falafel, salads, Greek nachos. $$ BW K TO L D M-Sa LARRY’S GIANT SUBS, 3611 St. Johns Bluff Rd. S., 641-6499. 4479 Deerwood Lake Pkwy., 425-4060. F
SEE ORANGE PARK.
MARIANAS GRINDS, 11380 Beach Blvd., Ste. 10, 206-612-6596. Pacific Islander fare, emphasizing chamorro culture. Soups, stews, fitada, beef oxtail, katden pika; spicy empanadas, lumpia, chicken relaguen, BBQstyle ribs, chicken. $$ TO B L D Tu-Su MELLOW MUSHROOM, 9734 Deer Lake Ct., 997-1955. F Bite Club. 2015 BOJ winner. SEE BEACHES.
MOXIE KITCHEN + Cocktails, 4972 Big Island Dr., 998-9744, moxiefl.com. BOJ winner. Chef Tom Gray’s venue has innovative contemporary American cuisine – seafood, steaks, pork, burgers, sides, desserts – using locally sourced ingredients when possible. $$$ FB K L M-F; D Nightly M SHACK, 10281 Midtown Pkwy., 642-5000. 2015 BOJ winner. SEE BEACHES.
OVINTE, 10208 Buckhead Br. Dr., 900-7730, ovinte.com. 2015 BOJ winner. European-style, influenced by Italy, Spain, Mediterranean. Small plates, entrée-size portions, charcuterie menu. 240-bottle/wines, 75/glass; craft spirits. Dine outdoors. $$ FB R, Su; D Nightly RITA’S DELI, 9446 Philips Hwy., 806-3923. Sandwiches of Boar’s Head meats, cheeses. $$ BW TO L D M-Sa TAVERNA YAMAS, 9753 Deer Lake Ct., 854-0426, tavernayamas.com. F Bite Club. Char-broiled kabobs, seafood, wines, desserts. Daily HH. Bellydancing. $$ FB K TO L D Daily TOMMY’S Brick Oven Pizza, 4160 Southside Blvd., Ste. 2, 565-1999, tbopizza.com. NY-style thin crust, brickoven-cooked pizzas – gluten-free. Calzones, sandwiches, Thumann’s no-MSG meats, Grande cheeses. Boylan’s soda. Curbside pickup. $$ BW K TO L D M-Sa TOSSGREEN, 4375 Southside Blvd., Ste. 12, 619-4356.
DINING DIRECTORY 4668 Town Crossing Dr., Ste. 105, 686-0234. Custom salads, burrito bowls; fresh fruits, vegetables, 100% natural chicken breast, sirloin, shrimp, tofu, nuts, cheeses, dressings, sauces, salsas, frozen yogurt. $$ K L D Daily
SPRINGFIELD, NORTHSIDE
HOLA MEXICAN Restaurant, 1001 N. Main St., 356-3100, holamexicanrestaurant.com. F Authentic fare: fajitas, burritos, specials, enchiladas. HH; sangria. $ BW K TO L D M-Sa
LARRY’S GIANT SUBS, 12001 Lem Turner Rd., 764-9999. SEE ORANGE PARK.
MELLOW MUSHROOM Pizza Bakers, 15170 Max Leggett Pkwy., 757-8843. F 2015 BOJ winner. SEE BEACHES. MOLLY BROWN’S PUB & GRILL, 2467 Faye Rd., 683-5044, mollybrownspubandgrill.com. F Traditional American fare, brunch, burgers, diner fare, hot dogs, sandwiches, seafood, Southern, vegetarian dishes. $$ FB TO L D Daily
CHEFFED-UP
BUTTER
MY BUTT & MAKE ME A
CUPCAKE CHEFFED-UP
Everything - EVERYTHING - is better with butter HOW MANY OF YOU HAVE COOKED WITH children? It truly is a treat. I recently began holding kids summer cooking camps at my cooking school and I’ve been loving it! The enthusiasm, desire to learn, and their great senses of humor are contagious. The cupcake camp has been my favorite, and that’s surprising because I’m really not a dessert guy. Actually, I’m the furthest thing from a pastry chef. Pastry chefs tend to be uptight, impatient, agonizingly precise, and just no fun. I, of course, as a former chef de cuisine, am extremely patient, easygoing, capable of adjusting to the situation and lots of fun. The one thing we do have in common is passion for our work. Making cupcakes is a lot of fun — because of the frosting. Specifically, buttercream frosting. Butter, that’s the heart of the issue. Butter, the best substance ever created by mankind. Butter, the only ingredient on this planet I could never live without! Do you ever have dreams involving butter? I do, all the time. Yeah, this may seem a tad obsessive, but I choose to think of it as passion. Not all butter is created equal. The USDA requires butters sold in the United States to contain a minimum of 80 percent milkfat. That means that all butters are delicious, but some are much, much better. The premium butters contain at least 82 percent milkfat. That may not sound like much of a change, but the taste difference is HUGE! The variance in richness, creaminess, lusciousness, is unfathomable. The ones available here that I like the most (I admit — I’m kinda afraid you’re going to buy it all, leaving none for me) are
Kerry Gold, Plugra and Presidents and, if you’re lucky, Vermont Creamery. Each one is incredible. They are truly dream-worthy. Take note: The best way to experience the pure, clean flavors of these exquisite, mouthwatering treats is in the unsalted version. Though salt is your friend, it has no place in butter. Always buy unsalted. Sprinkle a little coarse sel gris (grey salt) on top of ice-cold Kerry Gold, and join me in butter Nirvana! Here’s a basic buttercream recipe that’s practically foolproof. My junior chefs in cooking camp make their own colors with a little food coloring.
CHEF BILL’S BUTTERCREAM FROSTING Ingredients 1 pound butter, softened 1 pound powdered sugar 2 teaspoons real vanilla extract Directions 1. With a paddle, beat the butter in a bowl. Slowly add the sugar, scraping the sides as needed. 2. Add vanilla extract (or any other flavor). 3. Add food coloring of choice. Until we cook again,
Chef Bill cheffedup@folioweekly.com ___________________________________ Contact Chef Bill Thompson, owner of Amelia Island Culinary Academy in Historic Fernandina Beach, with your recipes or questions at cheffedup@folioweekly.com, for inspiration to get you Cheffed Up! JULY 6 - 12, 2016 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | 33
DALE RATERMANN’s Crossword presented by
PETS LOOKIN’ FOR LOVE FOLIO
SAN MARCO 2044 San Marco Blvd. 398-9741
PONTE VEDRA
THE SHOPPES OF PONTE VEDRA
330 A1A North 280-1202
W E E K LY
FOLIO LIVING
SOUTHSIDE
AVONDALE 3617 St. Johns Ave. 10300 Southside Blvd. 388-5406 394-1390 AVENUES MALL
PET
DEAR DAVI
LOVERS’
GUIDE
Davi continues touring NORTHEAST FLORIDA’S parks
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Monroe Street way “Dis” is it Mass apparel *Charles Schwab pessimist *The Brady Bunch family dog *Jag foe Pizazz Heart parts Maria Island Statesman Streets of bad dreams Batter’s need Living proof Bar duelers, at times Alpha string Trump Flat sound Zeus & Hera’s kid “… and then?” Sultan’s subjects Where you can find living answers to the starred clues In a frenzy Lacunas Part of DINK Chinook for head honcho Down an Angie’s Peruvian … mmm.
53 Psychologist Leary’s go-to travel means 54 WFOX promo 57 A Rubinstein 59 Workout targets 60 Rice-A62 Izmir natives 66 Parks at Jax transit terminal 68 Child’s retort 71 Luau locale 72 *Slimeball 73 *Last name in Shatner’s signature phrase 74 *Don’t flip it 75 Ione 76 Stage presence 77 What it takes to get in the game 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11
12 Maynard G. Krebs’ instrument 13 Hose woes 21 Armada fanatic 23 Rope or rug fiber 26 Company mark 27 SquarePants’ species 29 Steamed lobster simile 30 Tijuana’s place 31 *Grump 32 Ritz Theatre style 34 SWAT team member 36 Comedy bits 38 Gametes 40 Blue, at 30-Down 41 *Bo’s Club drapes 42 Realty sign 44 More conniving
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and fl ows Part of dynamic Bark part Batch of Brownies CSX stop If you’re , don’t drive! Say OK Upcoming MOSH speaker deGrasse Tyson Pop’s pop Menu term Napkin material
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Dear Davi, My human feels harried after a hectic day of work. Where can we go to escape the hustle and bustle of everyday life? Asha the Lhasa Apso
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J.D. exam Beethoven piece Critical cluck Bakery buys Download for a day by the dunes Analyze Draw a bead on Salsa’s cousin Crack investigator Jax Suns game delayer or closer Ex-Secretary of State Browning There’s a A and a B to a record Gator’s tail? -Cone Done, according to England’s first poet laureate John Dryden
Asha, Sometimes it’s nice to take a step back from a busy life and reconnect with nature. As I continued my walk around Jacksonville, I found Reddie Point Preserve, a small park tucked away in the old Arlington area. It’s a great local place to visit, if you like nature — and bugs. Note: Bring insect repellant and plenty of water. Aside from a fisherman who called me a good-looking dog, I was a lone wolf prowling for a new adventure. I checked the park map to plan my route, then saw a squirrel. Oh, snap! I lost my train of thought, so I went to the trailhead, marked the wooden post, and began my walk. The beaten path was grassy with dirt patches and tiny holes, probably local critters’ homes. Even though I was tempted to dig (I am a badger hound, after all), I was also a little leery, so I kept walking. All the new smells were a huge distraction to my snout. I stepped off the trail every so often to sniff around, but felt a tug on my leash. It put me back on track — my mom’s a real taskmaster. I walked farther back into the preserve and the trail split. I took the left-hand path and saw an even smaller trail into the woods. The tall weeds tickled my belly as I hopped along and — bam — the marsh. The water was too swift to swim, but the movement on shore looked mighty interesting. I pawed some small crabs as they scurried across the
Solution to 6.29.16 Puzzle R A S C A L S
I N E R T I A
B A E D D O V I A D N O
M J A A B I P I N U S A D T U N E E N L U S J E R D E G G E I T O N E P I T N Y L E L E T E D
C O B O V E L A F O H E O R A I D E S C Y S U S A L S L E P E E L Y S A S A C O I N I R A T D E M O
B R O I L P E W M U S E S
A D G E U D E R T T E R O A A H M I C E O R T Y M P O L S A R A I L E Y S A G E C A R E N E S O D
PET TIP: HOT DOGGING IT IT’S OFFICIALLY THE TIME OF YEAR WHEN YOU over-quote Wet Hot American Summer. (Don’t worry, we’ll still like you when you taste like hamburgers.) While you can survive by remaining absolutely still in the shade wearing only a thong, dogs are not as well-adapted to the muggy horror that is June, July and August (and September and parts of October – this is Florida). When the mercury rises, vets recommend skipping walks and car rides and being aware that asphalt, concrete and sand can burn the hell out of paws. Also remember that dogs with thick double coats – like Cockapoos and Australian Shepherds – are particularly susceptible to the heat.
sand, but didn’t catch one; they were too fast. I gave up and carried on. A few steps later, I was on another trail covered with pine needles and crunchy leaves. The path was shaded, the sounds unfamiliar, so I stopped to process the noises. My mom tugged on my leash again and I kept walking. Suddenly, I turned a corner and — whoa — I’m back where I started. The 1.5-mile loop was completed in less than 45 minutes! I ended my adventure by walking on the pier. It’s a wooden boardwalk used mostly for fishing, and I was ready to walk the whole thing. They say it’s a quartermile, but it looked much longer to me. The planks were scattered with poles and pieces of shrimp. I tried to take a bite, but felt that familiar yank. Ugh. The river breeze cooled my face as I headed down — it felt much better than the trail heat. Finally, I reached the end and got a spectacular view of the St. Johns River. That was worth the effort, but I was dog-tired and ready for a nap. This was another wag-worthy adventure. Reddie Point Preserve, 4499 Yachtsman Way, Arlington. The park can be hard to find. Travel north on University Boulevard past Jacksonville University and Blue Cypress Park, to the tip of Arlington. Turn right on Yachtsman Way; the park entrance is on the left. Details at timucuanparks.org/ reddie-point-preserve. Happy trails!
Davi mail@folioweekly.com ____________________________________ Davi the dachshund isn’t much of a fisher-dog, but he’s always happy to try.
PET EVENTS KATZ 4 KEEPS ADOPTION EVENT • The organization holds adoptions from 11 a.m.-3 p.m. Saturday, July 9 and Sunday, July 10 at 935B A1A N., Ponte Vedra, 834-3223, katz4keeps.org. Adoptions are scheduled throughout July, August and September.
ADOPTABLES
.
WAFFLES
SEEKING LESLIE KNOPE OR SIMILAR Are you a waffle fanatic? Do you think that breakfast fare is the top of the food chain? If you rank waffles as a priority next to friends and above work, then I’m the dog for you! Please come meet me at JHS and take me home. Even if you’re into chicken dinner, we’d still be BFFs! I hear chicken goes great with waffles. More information at jaxhumane.org. MEGA ADOPTION EVENT • First Coast No More Homeless Pets hosts a Mega Adoptions to help ease the burden on local animal shelters and find forever homes for furry friends. 10 a.m.-6 p.m. July 15-17, Jacksonville Fairgrounds, 510 Fairgrounds Place, Downtown. fcnmhp.org/showyou-care/adopt-a-pet. VACCINATION CLINICS • VetCo routinely offers lower-cost vaccination services at PetCo stores in the area. Upcoming vaccinations events are held
ADOPTABLES
GARFIELD
LASAGNA HATERS NEED NOT APPLY Just like my namesake, I love food. There’s nothing I would like better than a seat on the couch next to you … and your dinner plate! Come on over to JHS and let’s discuss world events over a nice can of tuna fish. Whattya say? For adoption information and other details, visit jaxhumane.org. from 4-5 p.m. on Sunday, July 10 at PetCo, 950 Marsh Landing Parkway, Jax Beach, 273-3225; and from 10:30 a.m.-noon on Sunday, July 10 at PetCo, 463713 S.R. 200, Yulee, 225-0014; vetcoclinics.com.
To list a pet event, send event name, time, date, location (complete street address and city), admission price, contact number/website to print, to mdryden@folioweekly.com – at least two weeks before the event. JULY 6 - 12, 2016 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | 35
FREEWILL ASTROLOGY
HATCHETS, ELIXIRS, ZODIAC
MAKEOVERS & WHISPERING TREES ARIES (March 21-April 19): Events next week may trick your mind and tweak your heart. They might mess with your messiah complex and wreak havoc on your habits. But I bet they’ll energize your muses and add melodic magic to mysteries. They’ll slow you down in such a way as to speed up your evolution, and spin you in circles with such lyrical grace, you may become delightfully clear-headed. Will you howl and moan? Probably, likely out of poignant joy, not angst and anguish. Will you be knocked off course? Maybe, but by a good influence, not a bad one.
TAURUS (April 20-May 20): In A Survival Guide to the Stress of Organizational Change, the authors tell how to raise stress levels. Assume others are responsible for lowering your stress levels, they say. Resolve not to change anything about yourself. Hold on to everything in your life that’s expendable. Fear the future. Get embroiled in trivial battles. Try to win new games as you play by old rules. The authors also offer suggestions on how to reduce stress. Get good sleep, they advise. Exercise regularly. Don’t drink too much caffeine. Feel gratitude. Clearly define strong personal goals, let go of lesser wishes. Practice forgiveness and optimism. Talk to yourself kindly. It’s a good place to start a strategy for the rest of 2016. GEMINI (May 21-June 20): Usually I’m skeptical about miraculous elixirs, sudden cures and wild breakthroughs. I avoid fantasizing about a “silver bullet” that can simply and rapidly repair an entrenched problem. I’m setting aside caution as I evaluate your prospects for the months ahead. I don’t believe a sweeping transformation is guaranteed, but I suspect it’s more likely than usual. Open your mind. CANCER (June 21-July 22): As I gaze into my crystal ball and invoke a vision of your near future, I see you communing with elemental energies beyond your power to control. I also see the spirit of fun is keeping you safe and protected. Your strength is unfurled, ensuring love trumps chaos. It’s a dream come true: You have joyous confidence as you explore the Great Unknown, trusting in fluidic intuition to guide you. LEO (July 23-Aug. 22): “You can only go halfway into the darkest forest,” says a Chinese proverb. “Then you are coming out the other side.” You’ll soon reach that midpoint. You may not recognize how far you’ve already come, so I’m here to give you a heads-up. Keep the faith! Another clue: As you’ve wandered through the dark forest, you’ve been learning practical lessons that’ll come in handy during the phase of your journey beginning after your birthday. VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22): My devoted contingent of private detectives, intelligence agents, and psychic sleuths wander the globe gathering data to use for your horoscopes. In recent days, they’ve reported that many of Virgos are seeking expansive visions and mulling long-term decisions. Your tribe seems unusually relaxed about the future, eager to be emancipated from shrunken possibilities. Crucial in this wonderful development has been an inclination to stop obsessing on small details and avoid being distracted by transitory concerns. Hallelujah! Keep up the good work. Think BIG! BIGGER! BIGGEST! LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 22): After years of painstaking research, psychic surgeons at Beauty & Truth Lab have fi nally perfected the art and science of Zodiac Makeovers. Using the patented technique Mythic Gene Engineering, they 36 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | JULY 6 - 12, 2016
can transplant the planets of your horoscope into different signs and astrological houses from the ones you were born with. The psychic surgeons cut and splice according to your specifications, enabling you to be re-coded with a destiny you desire. Unfortunately, cost of this pioneering technology is prohibitive for most. The good news? In the months ahead, you have the power to reconfi gure life’s path using other, less expensive, purely natural means. SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21): In high school, I was a good athlete with a promising future as a baseball player. But my aspirations were aborted in sophomore year when the coach banished me from the team. My haircut and wardrobe were too weird, he said. I may have been a skillful shortstop, but my edgy politics made him nervous and mad. At the time, I was devastated by his expulsion. Playing baseball was my passion. In retrospect, I’m grateful. The coach ended my jock career, steering me toward my true callings: poetry, music and astrology. Identify a comparable twist in your destiny. What unexpected blessings were yours through a seeming adversary? The time’s ripe to lift those blessings to the next level. SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21): Do you remember a turning point when you came to a fork in the road of destiny at a moment when your power wasn’t strong? And do you recall how you couldn’t muster the potency to make the most courageous choice, but instead headed in an easier direction? Here’s intriguing news: Your journey has delivered you, via a convoluted route, to a place not too far from that fork. It’s possible you could return and revisit the options – now more mature and meaningful – with greater authority. Trust your exuberance. CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19): I love writing your horoscopes. Your interest in my insight spurs my creativity and makes me smarter. As I search for inspiration you need, I continually reinvent my approach to fi nding the truth. The theories I had about your destiny last month may not be applicable now. My devotion to following your ever-shifting story keeps me enjoyably off-balance, propelling me free of habit and predictability. I’m grateful for your infl uence! Write thank-you notes like to the one I’ve written. Address them to those who move and transform you. AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18): After an Illinois man’s wife whacked him in the neck with a hatchet, he didn’t hold a grudge. Just the opposite. Recovering from a lifethreatening wound, Thomas Deas testified he still loved his attacker, and hoped they could reconcile. Is this admirable or pathetic? I’ll go with pathetic. Forgiving one’s allies and loved ones for their mistakes is wise, but allowing and enabling their maliciousness and abuse should be taboo. Keep that standard in mind during the weeks ahead. Folks close to you may engage in behavior that lacks integrity. Be compassionate but tough-minded. PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20): Can water run uphill? Not usually. But there’s an eccentric magic circulating in your vicinity, and it could generate phenomena comparable to water running uphill. I wouldn’t be surprised to see the equivalent of stars coming out in the daytime. Or a mountain moving out of the way. Or the trees whispering an oracle just when you need it. Be alert for anomalous blessings. They may be so different from what you think’s possible, they could be hard to recognize.
Rob Brezsny freewillastrology@freewillastrology.com
NEWS OF THE WEIRD IT’S SO NOW – ZOMBIES!
Medical Daily, in a May review of cases, noted progress in dealing with Cotard’s syndrome — a disorder that leads patients to believe they have no blood or vital body parts — or feeling they’re dead (or may as well be). Studies show one in about 200 psychiatric patients exhibit symptoms, and one doctor, describing a brain scan of his patient, said brain activity resembled that of a person in a coma or under anesthesia. Cotard’s, aka walking corpse syndrome, leads patients to thus avoid eating or bathing (asking themselves, why bother?).
DRUGS - IS THERE ANYTHING THEY CAN’T DO?
University of Georgia student Benjamin Abele, 22, was subdued by four police officers on May 29 after he ran naked down an Athens street and leapt into the gooey, malodorous back of a garbage truck, wallowing in the slimy liquid that pools under the gunk (hindering arrest), and then attempting to burrow further into the filthiness to somehow “escape.” Two Taser shots had no effect, and he was identified as high on PCP.
THAT’S JUST COLD, Y’ALL
A woman in Goldsboro, North Carolina, got a freezer from her neighbor months ago but said she hadn’t looked inside until May, when she found parts of a dead body and called authorities. She said the neighbor had discouraged her from opening the freezer because “a church” was using it as a “time capsule.”
HOLY SHIT!
In May, the apparently devout Katy Vasquez of Winter Park, Florida, posted a sincerely written entry on Facebook (and told Huffington Post in an interview) that she had just seen a “sign from God” — a cross — as a smudge in her infant’s soiled diaper. “I prayed to God for a sign that everything would be OK,” she gushed to the reporter. “It might not be the prettiest sign, but he put it where he knew I’d see it.”
JOHN JACOB JINGLEHEIMER SCHMIDT Voters in June in the village of Draguseni, Romania, elected Vasile Cepoi mayor — no,
not the Vasile Cepoi who lost, or the other Vasile Cepoi who lost. The winner was the incumbent mayor, Vasile Cepoi. There was also a fourth candidate, who was not named Vasile Cepoi.
HOLY SHIT PT. II
A court in Canberra, Australia, found Wesley King not guilty of a 2014 burglary despite his DNA found at the crime scene — on his underpants. Wrote Chief Justice Helen Murrell in June: There is a “reasonable possibility” that the burglar was someone else wearing unwashed underwear previously worn by the accused. Therefore, she found King not guilty of all charges.
DEUZ YER DEWG BITE?
Even though quite rare, two people recently reported foreign accent syndrome after their brain traumas apparently caused crossing of cranial “wires.” “J.C.,” 50, was described in the journal Cortex as an energetic Italian who, after a brain injury, inexplicably speaks constantly in “emphatic, error-prone French.” Six months ago, Lisa Alamia of Rosenberg, Texas, awoke from surgery inexplicably speaking in a British accent (particularly confusing her family and friends, since she previously spoke not so much “English” as “Texan”). Medical experts cited by CBS News reported that fewer than 100 people worldwide have ever been diagnosed with foreign accent syndrome.
FILM FOLLIES
To their surprise, Sophie Scafidi and friends, on an outing in Hampton Beach, New Hampshire, in June, learned a man spying on and photographing them through a camera lens hidden in a Gatorade bottle painted black wasn’t violating any law. The lens was rigged to his phone, which had beach photos, including some of children, police told Scafidi even surreptitious photography in sleazy circumstances, as long as done on public property, was legal — the only law broken was by whoever got the “camera” to show cops. Chuck Shepherd weirdnews@earthlink.net
No left or right swipe here – you can actually use REAL WORDS to find a REAL LOVE! Folio Weekly Magazine can help you connect with that surfer hunk you almost talked to at the Young Vegan Professionals meet-up, or that gum-crackin’ goddess at Target who “accidentally” dropped a jasmine-scented kazoo in your cart.
Go to folioweekly.com/i-saw-u.html, fill out the FREE form correctly by 5 p.m. Friday (for the next Wednesday’s FWM) – next stop: Bliss!
(40 words or fewer, dammit)
AVONDALE ANGEL Me: Down on my luck, no place to go. You: Beautiful person who kept me from sleeping on the street. Thank you for your generosity for someone you didn’t even know! You’ll never ever be forgotten! When: June 16. Where: Avondale shops. #1619-0706 COOPER’S HAWK NICE SMILE WAITER You weren’t our waiter last Thursday 6/16; served us before. Name starts with G. Cute, dark blond hair, warm personality. Me: Brunette, curly hair, navy blue dress. You noticed us in booth. A drink, conversation? Contact. When: June 16. Where: Cooper’s Hawk Winery Towncenter. #1618-0622 CORGI GIRL Your smile’s radiant. How you synchronize those long legs in immense contrast with your pups is marvelous. I’m grateful, mostly handsome, longing to please. Love to join you and poochie for evening stroll along the river. XOXO. When: June 10. Where: Riverside. #1617-0622 TRADE PORSCHE FOR BEACH CRUISER? Drawn to your fit physique, adored biceps as you chilled with friend! You complimented my Porsche. Offered to trade it for your cruiser. Didn’t ask for number. WOD together on next bring-a-friend day?! When: 4 p.m. June 5. Where: Zeta Brewing bicycle stand. #1616-0622 VYSTAR LOAN OFFICER You: Beautiful blue-eyed, curly blond hair, rockin’ all black outfit, accent colored shirt. Me: Trying to get a loan. Made conversation to keep process going. Second Wednesday in June. Didn’t get loan; might’ve found so much more! When: June 8. Where: Vystar. #1615-0622 YOU’RE IN MY THOUGHTS There’s still not a day I don’t think of you. Since the first time ISU while sitting in that car, I can’t shake thoughts of you. Live long. Love hard. I will. When: Feb. 2, 2016. Where: Neighborhood. #1614-0622 JOIN YOUR SWIM TEAM Me: Attractive in two-piece bathing suit. You: Swimming; American flag tat on arm, making me hot as you chilled in the pool. Really want to skinny dip with you. ;) When: June 3. Where: Greentree Place Apts. Pool. #1613-0622 FRIDAY BIKE-TO-WORK DAY You: Blue jeans, black tank top, red Motobecane bicycle, great smile. Didn’t get a chance to get your name. Me: Doing the bike thing. Are you up for a ride? When: May 20. Where: Hemming Plaza. #1612-0608
COMEDY ZONE Goldberg lookalike, Comedy Zone May 27, admiring each other while waiting with friends. Me: Hot brunette in black tank top and jeans. When: May 27. Where: Comedy Zone. #1608-0525 DRIVE-THRU WINDOW PRINCESS Porsche, Prius; whatever I drive; at drive-thru window, you drive me crazy! Curious: Are pretty smile, friendly remarks more than sales-driven? Clarify over coffee? You get my name right. Will heed your advice: Come by more often. When: May 9. Where: St. Johns Town Ctr. fastfood drive-thru. #1607-0525 RED SCOOTER MISFIT Little red scooter. You: Dark, mysterious, flying through Five Points on a little red Honda Spree. Me: Black dress, circle shades. Have my babies. <3. When: Every day. Where: Five Points. #1606-0518 PASSED YOU AT LUNCH Me: Going to lunch, bright teal dress shirt, said hello. You: Walking other way; very pretty young lady, flowery top, blonde hair, said howdy. Exchanged glances; looked back, you were gone. I should have said something. When: May 4. Where: Devry University Concourse Café. #1605-0511 BEAUTIFUL WEST VIRGINIAN You: Tan BBW, three mixed kids, WVU tank top, American flag tattoo on back. Me: Overall cutoffs, American flag tattoo on neck, Gator T-shirt. You offered snuff. Nervous, I refused. Like to dip in you in my single-wide. When: April 8. Where: Collins Road Trailer Park. #1604-0413 MY TRAILER PARK QUEEN Me: Long hair, tats, white shirt, sippin’ a Bud Lite with my pops. You: Prego, kid on each hip, also drinking a Bud Lite, puffin’ a Winston. Let’s get drunk; lemme put another one in the oven. When: April 3. Where: Ramona Flea Market Beer Garden. #1603-0406 ACCIDENTALLY PUBLIC MAKEOUT You: Adorably nerdy guy, incredible hands. Me: Petite (younger) fashionista, completely enchanted. Made-out like teenagers in Starbucks parking lot before realizing patio full of people could see. I’d do it again without changing a thing! When: March 20. Where: Starbucks. #1602-0330 COME DELIVER PIZZA AGAIN! Me: Male in jeans, navy polo, bumbled over receipt. You: Male, delivered Pizza Hut to my door. I didn’t say much, but would’ve liked to! When: March 12. Where: My condo near The Avenues. #1601-0316
HANDSOME EDUCATED HARLEY RIDER We instantly hit it off talking. I tried to quickly give you my number. I was on a blind date that was NOT meant to be. I’d like to have a chance to continue our conversation. When: May 22. Where: River City Brewing Co. #1611-0608
LISTENING PUNK ROCK IN TRUCK You: Blue/black truck, 8 p.m. I came out, you turned radio up so I’d look; you flashed best grin. Sandy, maybe curly hair, bright eyes, that dang smile! Who ARE you? Gotta know. When: March 7. Where: Welcome Food Mart, St. Augustine. #1600-0316
DANCIN’ IN THE STREETS CUTIE You: Short, big white hat, gorgeous eyes, with friend outside bookstore. Me: Sunglasses, tan, wanted to flirt. We locked eyes. I got brave, you were gone – kicking myself since. Won’t hesitate again. Share a dance? When: May 21. Where: Atlantic Beach Dancin’ Festival. #1610-0525
TIJUANA FLATS DROPPED SODA SHERRY? You: Fletcher lacrosse sweatshirt; dropped soda, came back. Me: Waiting too patiently for table, talking to you while you waited for takeout. (Insert cheesy line here, preferably including queso.) Single? Let’s grab a drink. When: Feb. 23. Where: Hodges Tijuana Flats. #1599-0316
BIRDIES BLUE-EYED BRUNETTE Beautiful day. You: Porch sitting with friends. Me: Walking dog down strip. We caught eyes. Couldn’t tell if you knew me or wanted to; we couldn’t look away. Hope next time it’s more than an awkward stare. When: May 15. Where: Birdies. #1609-0525
GANESH TATTOOED HOT BLONDE GODDESS Ball cap. Thanks for letting me take pic of adorable Ganesh on your beautiful arm! I was totally intrigued, want to connect over chai sometime. The pic got overwhelming likes on IG! When: Feb. 27. Where: SeaWalk Pavilion Jax Beach. #1598-0309 JULY 6 - 12, 2016 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | 37
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FOLIO VOICES : BACKPAGE EDITORIAL
AN
OPEN LETTER TO LENNY CURRY A local gay man reads the mayor THE RIOT ACT on LGBTQ issues
Dear Mayor Curry, I am a retired 60-year-old white Jewish gay man who emigrated from Orlando to Jacksonville in 1990 to be with my husband, who proposed to me in the gazebo on Lake Virginia at Rollins College, while serving on the USS Tennessee at Naval Submarine Base Kings Bay. He since has retired from Naval Air Station-Jax, after more than 20 years of service to our nation. So Jax has always been our home and Tommy Hazouri will always be our mayor. I read with interest the comments you made regarding your opposition to using the targeted slaughter of LGBTQ victims in Orlando for the purpose of advancing a “political agenda” here in Jax. I’m curious to know which other civil rights protection you consider a political agenda? Is race a political agenda? How about national origin? Age? Sex? Religion? Does our mayor also believe one’s religion is a political agenda, as more than 60 percent of your Republican party believes? It seems that most members of your party regarded all of these civil rights as political agendas at some point. I had hoped you were better than that. Who exactly do you think would be offended by such a linkage? Do you think any of the 49 slaughtered LGBTQ people would oppose their heinous murder being the catalyst that finally brought equal protection under law to Jacksonville’s LGBTQ community, or any other cities anywhere? Or do you think any of the 53 wounded LGBTQ survivors would oppose their horror and pain being used as a justification for legislating a safer world for their LGBTQ sisters and brothers? Perhaps, Mr. Mayor, your smallmindedness cannot fathom the families and friends of the dead and wounded LGBTQ victims supporting any actions that would make the world a safer, fairer place for all LGBTQ persons. Or is it that fellow members of your Florida Republican Party’s base would oppose such actions? Is it because we may find a more sympathetic ear or softened heart making HRO passage more likely, following such an unspeakable act, another unspeakable event in a long line of such attacks against our LGBTQ family, friends, coworkers and neighbors. Need I remind you of the LGBTQ Upstairs Lounge where 32 people, many congregated for a church meeting, were burned alive? Or
21-year-old Matthew Shepard, beaten and tortured into a dripping red raggedy-doll, then strung on a barbed-wire fence to die alone and nearly naked on that cold, clear Laramie night, the stars his only witness. Or San Francisco City Supervisor Harvey Milk, my personal hero, shot point-blank five times at work by a homophobic Twinkie-binger, the last two shots fired with the .38 pressed firmly against Milk’s head. Or the “Don’t ask, don’t tell” case involving Petty Officer Allen Schindler who was brutally stomped to death in a public toilet in Nagasaki by a bigoted shipmate, destroying every organ in Schindler’s body including his penis, leaving only a tattoo from which his mother was able to identify her son. Or the bullied 11-yearold Carl Joseph Walker-Hoover who hanged himself with an electrical cord following repeated taunts that he was gay and acted like a girl. My LGBTQ family are brutalized and murdered nearly every day in nearly every state in the nation. The list of unspeakable acts targeting LGBTQ people goes on and on. Why is it, Mr. Mayor, that Republican state legislatures across America have passed laws either restricting municipalities from passing equal protections for LGBTQ communities, nullifying existing ones or both? Aside from the means, how is their message different from the executioner’s at Pulse? But all the violent acts against us collectively pale in comparison to the decimation of my gay community caused by the stigma and homophobia about the HIV/AIDS crisis at all levels of American culture: societal, political, governmental and, particularly, religious. In my world, virtually every gay man over the age of 50 is a walking miracle. The president in office at the beginning of the HIV/AIDS crisis did not publicly utter the word “AIDS” until the final year of his second term … and for seven critical years the band played on. After more than 30 years of HIV/ AIDS in the U.S., more than 650,00 mostly white gay males have lost their lives to the disease; even with today’s advancements in treatment, there are more than 7,500 mostly black gay male deaths every year. That’s more than 20 every day. I know this because I served the last decade of my professional career as the Health Department’s pointperson for HIV/AIDS training and technical
consulting in Duval and surrounding counties, and have given more than 25 years of volunteer work in the AIDS community. Complacency, as well as stigma and homophobia, causes deaths. But make no mistake, my LGBTQ community is winning the human and viral wars against us. Every day these challenges make us stronger. Securing our right to marriage equality is a paradigm change that will accelerate the speed at which all our future rights flow. This could have been accomplished only with the support of our strategically nurtured alliances across numerous aisles, fences and walls. So this is by no means an attempt to paint all Republicans with a broad brush. We stand together with numerous high-minded, big-hearted moderate conservatives who understand we are together in the struggle for a more perfect union. Councilpersons Aaron Bowman, Greg Anderson, and Jim Love are all committed to an inclusive HRO. As are philanthropist Delores Barr Weaver, Jax Chamber Chair Audrey Moran, businessman Preston Haskell and many corporations, to name a few. All these understand one basic truth about the human condition; Love is love is love is love is love. And they understand the most basic principle of our republic, e pluribus unum: out of many, one. But you, Mayor Curry, have chosen a different path, shameful and void of a moral compass. You have chosen to join with the lowest among us: the rabble-rousers and dog whistlers. You’ve taken up with those who preach completely unsubstantiated fear of public bathrooms. You, the Medicare fraud governor, and the “hate it” senator, are all cut from the same disintegrating cloth. You are now saddled with an orange standardbearer to lead the destruction of your party. And he’s willing to go it alone. Considering advancements in just the past year, exactly where do you think public opinion on LGBTQ rights will be in 2018? This train has long left you standing in the station, Mr. Mayor. You face the same political fate over the same “political agenda” as your predecessor. Only this time with even more enthusiasm. Mitch Marcus mail@folioweekly.com _____________________________________ Marcus is a retired Westside civil servant and community volunteer.
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