10/26/16 The Monster Next Door

2 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | OCTOBER 26 - NOVEMBER 1, 2016

OCTOBER 26 - NOVEMBER 1, 2016 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | 3

THIS WEEK // 10.26-11.1.16 // VOL. 29 ISSUE 30 COVER STORY

THE UNDERDOGS [12]

MONSTER

NEXT DOOR HATE GROUPS crawl out of the shadows in Northeast Florida STORY BY CLAIRE GOFORTH PHOTOS BY DENNIS HO

FEATURED FE EATURED ARTICLES

WHAT WIKILEAKS TAUGHT US

[8]

A TOTAL DRAG

[10]

PUT THE KOOL-AID DOWN, AMERICA

BY NIKKI SANDERS Local man BLOWS A GASKET over Green Cove Dragway

BY A. G. GANCARSKI How I made my PEACE with Hillary Clinton

[39]

BY COLETTE CORLISS SELLERS “I am losing interest in analyzing the mindsets of Trump’s supporters or of Trump himself. My interest is in whether these supporters will actually vote.”

COLUMNS + CALENDARS FROM THE EDITOR OUR PICKS FIGHTIN’ WORDS MAIL JAG CITY/NEWS ARTS

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FILM MUSIC LIVE MUSIC CALENDAR DINING DIRECTORY BITE-SIZED PINT-SIZED

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BUSINESS & ADMINISTRATION BUSINESS MANAGER • Lorraine Cover fpiadmin@folioweekly.com / ext. 119 PUBLISHER • Sam Taylor staylor@folioweekly.com / 904.860.2465

EDITORIAL EDITOR • Claire Goforth claire@folioweekly.com / ext. 115 SENIOR EDITOR • Marlene Dryden mdryden@folioweekly.com / ext. 131 A&E EDITOR • Daniel A. Brown dbrown@folioweekly.com / ext. 128 CARTOONIST • Tom Tomorrow CONTRIBUTING WRITERS Rob Brezsny, John E. Citrone, Josue Cruz, Julie Delegal, Susan Cooper Eastman, Marvin Edwards, AG Gancarski, Dan Hudak, Shelton Hull, MaryAnn Johanson, Mary Maguire, Keith Marks, Pat McLeod, Nick McGregor, Greg Parlier, Kara Pound, Dale Ratermann, Nikki Sanders, Matthew B. Shaw, Chuck Shepherd, Brentley Stead, Chef Bill Thompson, Marc Wisdom VIDEOGRAPHERS • Doug Lewis, Ron Perry, Carl Rosen

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FROM THE EDITOR

NORTHEAST FLORIDA GETS

NAILED Is it a bird? A plane? No, IT’S POISON!

NOW THAT AT THE AVERAG AVERAGE GE TEMPERA TEMPERATURE RATU TUREE around Northeast Florida has finally, mercifully dipped below hot as balls, people are crawling out of the air conditioning where they’ve spent the last six months sequestered and experiencing the great outdoors without immediately turning into the Swamp Thing.

Compared to the boiled ozone taste of summer, the cooler air is so clean and refreshing that you just want to gulp it down.

But before you breathe too deeply, be warned: Duval and St. Johns counties have been spraying a controversial insecticide right over our very heads.

The insecticide, naled, which is also commonly referred to by its product name, Dibrom, is in a class of poisons referred to as ‘organophosphates,’ which attacks the nervous systems of insects and other life forms, including humans. It’s been approved for use since 1959, and the Environmental Protection Agency website says that naled does not pose a risk of harm to humans if used properly, though individuals with preexisting health conditions or chemical sensitivities may experience skin, eye or respiratory irritation.

Nevertheless, the substance has earned the ire of environmental groups. But those fruitcakes are always up in arms about something, amiright?

Of course, there is the teensy matter of the bees. Remember way back in late August when 2.5 million honeybees up and died in South Carolina? Naled was their killer.

There’s also the probably insignificant fact that naled is banned by the Europe Union because, as Miami New Times reports, it poses an “unacceptable risk” to human and natural life.

As long as we’re on the subject, it bears mentioning that last summer, naled caused the island of Puerto Rico to lose its everloving mind when people found out that it had been surreptitiously shipped there by the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention for mosquito control. Seriously, their outrage was so intense that the Puerto Rican governor shipped the poison back stateside.

If people who live somewhere where Zika virus was actually being locally transmitted by mosquitoes would rather take their chances with Zika than get naled doesn’t give you pause, perhaps you’re moving too fast.

There’s also the tiny matter of its risk to aquatic invertebrates, such as shrimp, and other terrestrial wildlife, per the EPA. Or, if you’re more inclined to trust a collaboration of universities that includes Cornell, Michigan State, Oregon State and University of California at Davis: “Naled is toxic to most types of aquatic life,” and is “highly to moderately toxic to birds.”

If you’re ou’’re still not convinced, con inced d take it from the manufacturer’s mouth: American Vanguard Corporation subsidiary AMVAC Chemical Corp. writes in its Safety Data Sheet about Dibrom, “This product is toxic to fish, birds, and other wildlife. Keep out of any body of water. [Emphasis added]” It’s not like there’s a ton of lakes, swamps, rivers, streams, natural ponds, retention ponds, marshes or estuaries in Northeast Florida, though, right? Oh, right…

But it’s all worth it cause we’re fighting Zika virus, right? Nobody wants stand idly by and let even one baby get born with severe microcephaly. The optics alone of that squashed-in baby head could kill a political career.

Of course, it’s worth noting that there hasn’t even been one single case of Zika transmitted locally. And it might matter to people to know that naled may cause birth defects in fetuses whose mothers are exposed during pregnancy.

Jennifer Sass, senior scientist with environmental group Natural Resources Defense Council, told The Huffington Post in July that the neurotoxin is “among the class of the most toxic pesticides.” She went on to say that “recent studies have shown spraying pesticides in the same chemical class as Naled, even at ‘legally allowed exposure’ levels, is ‘definitely not safe during early brain development.’”

In spite of the foregoing things we might want to consider before spraying a neurotoxin in the same chemical family as sarin gas, St. Augustine Record reports that last week St. Johns County wrapped up a poison bath that coated 60,000 acres. And Duval County continues aerially spraying naled — weather permitting, of course. In what seems about the most boneheaded idea of all time, in Duval they’re spraying it in the morning hours while kids are going to school — also a great time to spray if you’re trying to kill bees and butterflies midair. At least St. Johns County had the courtesy to spray at night.

They both might want to take a page from the Orange County playbook: the Orlando Sentinel reports that officials there halted spraying naled way back in 2010 due to citizen concerns about its effect on wildlife and humans.

Now might be the time to call your local representative and ask what they’re doing to fight the real culprit: naled. Unless you really don’t give a flying fig about birds, bees, fish, invertebrates and fetuses, in which case, keep googling Donald Trump memes, IDFC. Claire Goforth claire@folioweekly.com OCTOBER 26 - NOVEMBER 1, 2016 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | 5

KICKOFFS & COCKTAILS FLORIDA/GEORGIA WEEKEND

While finding a ticket for this time-honored tradition is about as easy as finding a human hair on Donald Trump’s corpulent crown, the Florida/Georgia Weekend (Go Gators! How ’Bout Them Dawgs?! And so forth …) remains a beer-drenched bacchanal of (rightfully) legendary proportions. A flurry of events surround this pigskin party – did you know the teams trade headlining each year? 2016 is actually Georgia/Florida, but nobody we know admits to it), and wandering solo around RV City can give you a wellspring of anecdotes to tell your therapist. Game kickoff is 3:30 p.m. Saturday, Oct. 29, EverBank Field, Downtown; festivities begin Wednesday, Oct. 26; details at flga.org.

SAT

29

OUR PICKS

PUNKED OUT PREFEST INVASION 3

SAT

Two St. Augustine clubs are offering a gnarly, multiple-day assault of aggro punk, gnarly garage, and everything in between, at the Prefest Invasion 3, with performances by local, national and international acts including I Came From Earth, $2 Cheech, Kid You Not, Potato Rocket, Dan Webb & The Spiders, Irish Handcuffs, Singapore’s The Caulfield Cult (pictured), Black Drum, Mental Boy, Bobby’s Oar, Secret Stuff, Hodera, No Fun, Nato Coles & The Blue Diamond Band, The Scutches, The Raging Nathans, Wonk Unit Ceramicats, Faults, Sleeptalker, La Peche, Robes, Twelve Hour Turn and Dredger. 5:30 p.m. Wednesday, Oct. 26; 6 p.m. Thursday, Oct. 27, Planet Sarbez; 5 p.m.

Oct. 27, Shanghai Nobby’s; $10; $15 two-venue pass; for schedule, check out our Live Music listings on pages 27-29, or go to facebook.com/theplanetsarbez, facebook.com/shanghai.nobby.

29

WED

26

SUN

30

SWEET TRANSVESTITE

THE ROCKY HORROR PICTURE SHOW

Based on the 1974 musical The Rocky Horror Show, the following year’s The Rocky Horror Picture Show is indubitably the ultimate campy cult classic musical, telling the story of two hapless fiancées who are stranded at Dr. Frank N. Furter’s castle, along with his fellow degenerate denizens, and an abominable hunky bohunk created in Furter’s laboratory. A tribute to classic sci-fi and B movies, the film is best known for its encouraged – nay, mandated – audience participation. 8 p.m. with music openers Billy Buchanan & Free Avenue, Saturday, Oct. 29, Florida Theatre, Downtown, $15; wear costumes and bring props (but no meat!), floridatheatre.com.

6 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | OCTOBER 26 - NOVEMBER 1, 2016

REASONS TO LEAVE THE HOUSE THIS WEEK

FANG A GONG JU PERCUSSION

ENSEMBLE SCORES NOSFERATU

For the last several years, Jacksonville University percussion professor Tony Steve and the Jacksonville University Percussion Ensemble have provided a live score to classic films from the silent era. This week, they turn their timbral attentions to the original vampire flick, F.W. Murnau’s 1922 masterpiece, Nosferatu. 7:30 p.m. Sunday, Oct. 30 at JU’s Terry Concert Hall, Arlington, $10; $5 seniors, military, students, kids 17 and under, arts.ju.edu.

THE DARK STUFF

GHOSTWITCH For more than a decade,

THU

27

Ryan Gunwitch-Black has been boiling up a potent potion of darkly tinged tunes mixing swamp rock with a black patina of countrypunk and metal. Whether as a solo artist, with his now-full-band version of Ghostwitch, or in his latest doom metal explorations in bitchCoven, Gunwitch-Black continues to offer tasty, hell-born honky-tonk for the 21st century. 8 p.m. with Ursula & the Noctambulant, Thursday, Oct. 27, Jack Rabbits, San Marco, $8 advance; $10 day of, jaxlive.com.

OCTOBER 26 - NOVEMBER 1, 2016 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | 7

FOLIO VOICES : FIGHTIN’ WORDS

WHAT

WIKILEAKS TAUGHT US

How I made my PEACE with Hillary Clinton

IT’S TEMPTING, ESPECIALLY WITH AN election less than two weeks away, to view everything in an R vs D framework.

And it’s undeniable that members of both parties gin up that kind of sentiment.

Which is what makes it notable when a candidate or a sitting politician goes against the grain of the bipartisan death match narrative, as Sen. Marco Rubio did last week.

“I will not discuss any issue that has become public solely on the basis of WikiLeaks. As our intelligence agencies have said, these leaks are an effort by a foreign government to interfere with our electoral process, and I will not indulge in it.”

Rubio, of course, is running for re-election against Patrick Murphy, a strong Democrat.

And the senator spent much of his debate with Murphy last week differentiating himself from Donald Trump.

Those are real differentiations. Rubio, as a career politician, understands what Trump does not. His livelihood depends on maintaining the narrative that the current system has legitimacy.

Trump’s does not. And so Trump and his surrogates and media allies can push the narrative that the WikiLeaks trove of information, which seems like a daily deep dive into John Podesta’s mailbox, serves as a repudiation of business as usual.

We are supposed to be moved, appalled, outraged by what those leaks reveal about the perfidy of the Clinton campaign.

And Trump — if we believe the narrative that he actually wants to be president, rather than the narrative that he, perhaps, got in the race on a whim and kept sabotaging himself until he set himself up for a loss to one of the most unpopular major party politicians in American history — asserts that people should be appalled.

Rubio, however, doesn’t think the content of private emails is fair game.

“Today it is the Democrats. Tomorrow, it could be us,” Rubio said.

Odds are it probably will be the Republicans next. And then private citizens.

There is no privacy.

However, if one supposes that WikiLeaks items are admissible as real news, that the documents have been faithfully curated and undoctored, then one has to look at the substance of what the leaks reveal.

Leaving aside the false outrage, the reality is that, for many voters unconvinced by the Brave New World “stronger together” imagery of Hillary Clinton’s campaign, WikiLeaks makes a strong affirmative case for why she’s the most qualified candidate for the job.

I write this as someone who sees Clinton as the embodiment of the status quo.

Politically, her public rhetoric is as exciting and convincing to me as memos from an HR assistant director in an office park.

However, when Clinton differentiated between having a “public position” and a “private position” on financial sector reform, I understood.

8 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | OCTOBER 26 - NOVEMBER 1, 2016

There are things you tell people in crowded rooms, when you’re trying to whip up the marks between top-volume blaring of “Fight Song.”

And then there’s the truth.

I voted for Barack Obama. Twice.

The first time, it wasn’t because of “hope” and “change.” It was because McCain’s position on the TARP bailout was incoherent, and because Sarah Palin was a deal-breaker.

The second time, it was because I believed that Obama, freed from the burdens of having to run again, might take meaningful action on agenda items like removing cannabis from Schedule 1.

Turned out that wasn’t his agenda in the way Quantitative Easing was.

There has never been a hope and change narrative for Clinton. But WikiLeaks made a case for her that, ironically enough, only leaked documents could make.

There is no possibility to “make America great again,” in the sense that future generations will have a standard of living and a value put on their work that equals those of generations either dying or dead and gone.

The next president of the United States is sort of like the general manager of a Kmart on the Southside.

Things are not going to get magically better for that Kmart, making it where sales will improve year over year. But as long as there’s someone who knows how to work the system, to keep the Bluelight Specials going for the next four years, that’s probably the best we can hope for.

And that’s what Hillary Clinton offers.

Ms. Clinton is the school lunch-room menu planned out 180 days in advance. She’s like one of those football coaches who pops up in one job after another, not because she’s especially thrilling, but because she knows the mechanics of the game.

She knows audacious plays and theatrics are essentially meaningless, as are the fleeting passions of the pitchfork mob. She also knows that, for American society to work as it is currently configured and as it will be at least until my untimely death, there has to be a bill of goods the elites sell the rubes. And there has to be an understanding, behind the scenes, of how it really works.

It is revealing (and sorta reassuring) that when Americans got a peek behind the curtain of the Clinton machine, at least there was someone in the control room, wizard or not.

You can’t say that about the guy running against her.

A.G. Gancarski mail@folioweekly.com Twitter/AGGancarski

THE MAIL

POOR MAN’S AVONDALE

RE.: “Brickbats and Bouquets,” Oct. 19 THE BRICKBAT YOU SENT TO COUNCILMAN JIM Love was not deserved. First, the legislation he has introduced has become necessary because of the all-too-often-failure of the City planning and zoning bodies (Planning Dept., Planning Commission, LUZ Committee of City Council) to enforce laws already on the books regarding the requirements for new restaurants – mostly the parking requirements. As a result, neighborhood streets on either side of St. Johns Avenue become clogged with dining patrons to such an extent that homeowners who have no other place to park their cars find little available space on the streets where they live.

The comment about “certain (read: rich) areas” conveyed an erroneous picture of the residential areas on either side of the shops.

Yes, there are some fine, expensive homes to be found, but one does not have to look hard to find many modest bungalows, duplexes, multiunit apartment buildings and, occasionally, a decaying home.

The parking problem in Avondale has been going on for many years now, and I always find it interesting how the advocates for no restrictions for new restaurants mostly are from out of the

area and don’t care much if the ox of we who live there gets gored or not.

William Nussbaum via email

MISSING PIECES

RE.: “Picking Up the Pieces,” by Claire Goforth, Oct. 12 SORRY, BUT THIS ARTICLE IS WAY OFF. You make it seem like everyone came through unscathed. Many parts of St. Johns County have months if not a year of recovery ahead of them. Many homes damaged and destroyed.

This is not being properly covered by any of the media outlets.

Tim Sampson via Facebook

ALERT THE MINISTRY OF TRUTH

RE.: Facebook post accompanying “Columbus, Godfather of Modern Cuisine?” Oct. 12 PROPAGANDA! HE DID NOT VISIT AMERICA, he made it to some islands near the Americas; he was not a racist! He did not do atrocious, horrible things to the natives! His successors did. Get your B.S. straight, this crap belies your childishness.

Marc Kortlander via Facebook

LEND YOUR VOICE If you’d like to respond to something you read in the pages of Folio Weekly Magazine, please send an email (with your name, address, and phone number for verification purposes only) to mail@folioweekly.com, visit us at folioweekly.com, or follow us on Twitter or Facebook (@folioweekly) and join the conversation.

BRICKBATS + BOUQUETS BOUQUETS TO AAGEX FREIGHT GROUP On Oct. 24, AAGEX co-sponsored the seventh annual Children’s Safe Passage Charity Golf Tournament, which benefits the Child Sexual Abuse Prevention Coalition. Inspired by the abduction and murder of 7-year-old Somer Thompson, AAGEX CEO Mike Williams started Children’s Safe Passage in 2010 to give back to the community by supporting the cause of preventing violence and sexual exploitation of local children.

BRICKBATS TO CLAY ELECTRIC COOPERATIVE In its September newsletter, CEC published a glowing endorsement of Amendment 1, conveniently failing to mention that numerous environmentalist groups and renewable energy advocates vehemently oppose the amendment, which they believe will decimate the fledgling solar industry in Florida. Curiously, the article was published almost verbatim by at least two other electric coops, including CHELCO, which serves Walton and North Okaloosa counties, and Escambia River Electric Cooperative, which serves customers in Santa Rosa County. Collusion much?

BOUQUETS TO LENNAR JACKSONVILLE In February, Recon Marine Christopher Natta was paralyzed during a nighttime training skydive. Now a quadriplegic, Natta’s life, along with his wife’s and their toddler son’s has been turned upside down. His wife, Sydney, has been by her husband’s side in the hospital every step of the recovery process, but the couple longed to be reunited under one roof with their son, who has been staying with Sydney’s parents. Lennar Jacksonville answered their prayers and on Oct. 24, broke ground on a brand new home it’s building for the young family in its Mill Creek Community.

DO YOU KNOW SOMEONE WHO DESERVES A BOUQUET? HOW ABOUT A BRICKBAT? Send submissions to mail@folioweekly.com; 50 word maximum, concerning a person, place, or topic of local interest.

OCTOBER 26 - NOVEMBER 1, 2016 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | 9

JAG CITY JAG

MELTDOWN IN THE

BANK

Jags embarrassed at home in EVERY way possible

10 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | OCTOBER 26 - NOVEMBER 1, 2016

Local man BLOWS A GASKET over Green Cove Dragway

A TOTAL

DRAG ANXIOUSLY AWAITING THE GREEN LIGHT, drivers get ready to show the crowd what they’re made of. When the light changes, they’re off, barreling down the drag strip, engines open, maxed out and ready to win.

The crowd cheers them on to glory, the faint smell of burned rubber lingers in the air and the roar of the engines fuels the excitement.

One lucky winner will walk away with bragging rights and their signature in the Winners Circle, Green Cove Dragway’s Wall of Fame.

That’s what spectators see, but to some area residents, the Green Cove Dragway is a nuisance. They complain the crowd and the cars are way too loud. It’s gotten so bad now that the Dragway is in jeopardy of being closed down. Owner Peter Scalzo is determined to make sure that does not happen.

A former New Yorker, Scalzo will tell you exactly how he feels. He had no kind words for the man he says has waged a war against him, a war Scalzo is certain he will win.

Since 2013, Scalzo has been given a major special permit by Reynolds Industrial Park, where the dragway is located, and a year-toyear permit by the Green Cove Springs City Council. He says the dragstrip provides “clean family fun.” According to Scalzo, they don’t serve alcohol, are respectful tenants and have done everything possible to work with the Green Cove Springs City Council and the Green Cove Springs Police Department.

Still, he’s been fighting for the right to keep his business open. Scalzo said the GCSPD recently measured sound levels at the dragway. “[The noise decibels were] all over the place, depending on the location of the readings, wind direction and other sounds at the time such as traffic, airplane, train, air condition, even frogs.” he said. According to Scalzo, under the local ordinance, “the decibel limits cannot be exceeded by more than two minutes in a continuous one-hour period. A loud race car or motorcycle runs down the track in less than 5 seconds.” The ordinance further restricts permissible sound levels between the hours of 10 p.m. and 7 a.m.

Following the council’s unanimous vote on Sept. 6 to give Scalzo the opportunity to come into compliance with the noise ordinance by next May, when his special events permit is due for renewal, he immediately stopped staging races on Friday nights and started closing early. He’s also made changes to contain the noise.

Peter Scalzo

In order to reduce the sound of roaring engines from spilling over into adjacent properties, Scalzo installed more noise barriers and agreed to “cut the track down to only Saturday night.” And the race activities will end at 10 p.m., regardless of whether the race being run is won or not. Since these changes were made, Scalzo said, he’s been “losing more than 50 percent” of the usual revenue. Saturday night has historically been the business’ best night, he said. “The 10 o’clock curfew is a big reason why we are doing less business on Saturday,” Scalzo said.

He isn’t the only one who claims lost revenue due to the feud. Green Cove Springs resident Peter Swanson said his home’s appraisal value has gone down considerably because of the noise. He says he petitioned the Clay County property appraiser department to lower his taxes because of the noise, but when the appraiser visited the property, the department felt a tax break was not justified.

Scalzo told Folio Weekly that Swanson is leading the charge against his dragway.

He says Swanson never attends council meetings, and added that he believes Swanson is just a troublemaker.

For his part, Swanson told FW that the residents were there first and the noise came second. When asked if he would be satisfied if the dragway was able to reduce the noise to the decibels allowed by GCS, or if he wants the dragway to relocate, he indicated that perhaps the neighborhood is big enough for the both of them. “If the track can do something that lowers the noise, then we are fine with that; if it is not possible, then they would have to relocate,” he said.

Swanson added that he is not often at home on Saturday nights, so if Scalzo had recently added new noise barriers, he could not honestly attest to their effectiveness.

Scalzo has said he added 12 additional soundproofing storage containers recently, on top of the original six that were already there. A new sound test is planned.

Swanson’s home is 4.5 miles from Reynolds Airpark airport and a half-mile from a railroad track; the dragway is 2.5 miles away. He has not complained about the sound coming from the airport or the railroad tracks, both of which predate the three-year-old dragway. “[We] just want it to go back to the way it was when we purchased the property,” Swanson said.

Nikki Sanders mail@folioweekly.com

photo by Dennis Ho

GOING INTO SUNDAY’S GAME, THE JAGUARS had a chance to reach .500 and secure a win streak. Instead, the team fell apart quicker than hopes for a turned-around season.

Discipline, turnovers, scoring. I feel I’m repeating the obvious more than Head Coach Gus Bradley, but week after week, the Jags prove they can’t improve in any of these categories.

The Jags racked up almost as many penalties as points and had more ejections than touchdowns. Oddly enough, I was talking to some folks, wondering if anybody has been ejected for two unsportsmanlike personal fouls this season. One quarter later, Malik Jackson became the first.

But it wasn’t just penalties. The Raiders lost more yards from penalties and still chalked up 33 points and a win. They put points on the board and, more important, touchdowns.

Quick starts and scores were a focus during the off-season. Yet again on Sunday, the team failed in miserable fashion to do either.

The first three red zone visits for the Jags resulted in an interception and two field goals.

The interception was thrown in the end zone – into triple coverage.

In between this stretch, a fumbled punt handed the Raiders a short field and forced the defense back onto the field. Despite the 33 points they allowed, the defense doesn’t share as much of the blame as the other side of the ball.

There’s little doubt Bradley and offensive coordinator/atrocious play-caller Greg Olson will be done after the season, but will it also be the end for quarterback Blake Bortles?

Bortles is currently in the bottom five for quarterback rating and completion percentage, has the third-most interceptions and lingers in the middle of every other major QB category.

Beyond stats, his throwing motion has regressed and he’s either unable to see coverage properly, or he’s overly confident in his ability to beat it.

Bortles has also begun to allow his emotions to affect his leadership abilities. Early trots off the field after losses and silently sitting after missed opportunities are not what a struggling offense needs. They need somebody who will fire them up and keep their heads in the game.

Maybe it’s happening in the locker room, but it needs to transition to the field when and where it’s needed most.

Writing off former QB Blaine Gabbert was easy because, simply put, he was awful from the start. As a Bortles fan, I find it’s more difficult to dismiss him, but in his third year, he needs to be finding his peak.

Realistically, the season ahead won’t be so forgiving. With games against the Chiefs, Vikings, Broncos and a pair against the Texans, the Jags will have to play solid football to even stand a chance.

The AFC South is a weak division, so technically a division championship is within reach.

But given what we’ve seen so far, expect the Jags to fall further and further behind fi rst place each week.

Is it time to talk draft yet?

Mark Judson mail@folioweekly.com @MarkfromJax Facebook/FolioWeeklyJagCity

FOLIO COMMUNITY : NEWS

OCTOBER 26 - NOVEMBER 1, 2016 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | 11

the

MONST

I

In many ways, Ken Parker is everything you’d expect of a Grand Dragon of the Loyal White Knights of the Ku Klux Klan: a white man with a dead-end job in his mid-30s who lives in a mid-to-lower income apartment in a mid-to-lower-income apartment complex in a city in the American South, a rabid anti-Semitic who opposes homosexuality, peppers his speech with racial slurs too abhorrent for print and longs for the good ol’ days when the KKK ruled the South. He’s also a Navy veteran, Hillary Clinton

story by CLAIRE

12 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | OCTOBER 26 - NOVEMBER 1, 2016

supporter (he says) and rather friendly for someone who wishes that all non-white, non-Christian, nonstraight people would leave the country.Parker invited Folio Weekly into his home because he took issue with a satirical story about fliers that urged white men to unite because “the n------ are here,” which had been thrown from a moving car in neighborhoods around town in the wee hours of July 15. The fliers also included a phone number and the web address of the Loyal White Knights of the KKK.

GOFORTH

In that piece, entitled “Klan Attempts to Prove It Still Exists,” we wrote, “This was the latest local effort to recruit perpetual-adolescent bigots with low IQs and big dreams of reliving the pre-Civil War ‘glory days’ when their ancestors were poor yeoman farmers one drought from starvation,” and referred to his “(probably) dumpy Southside, Jacksonville home.”

Upon reading the foregoing satire about “a couple of ignorant Southside boys” who “were still sleeping off a mighty hangover courtesy of cheap domestic

photos by DENNIS

HO

HATE GROUPS crawl out of the shadows in Northeast Florida

TER next door and had not yet mustered the gumption to roll off the bare mattresses on which they rest their greasy mullets night after night,” Parker called, messaged and emailed the FW offices to set the record straight. He wasn’t peeved about the name-calling, the assumption that he has a mullet (he doesn’t) or the insult to his ancestors; no, Parker took issue with the assertion that he lives in a dump.

Days later, FW sat down in a modest two bedroom walkup that, other than the collection

of KKK and Nazi memorabilia, could be any apartment in Jacksonville. The sounds of a television drifted through a closed bedroom door as Parker sat at his dining room table with the windows closed and shades mostly drawn to the bright afternoon sun, chain-smoking generic cigarettes and chatting animatedly for over an hour about his worldview, which

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Despite believing that black Africans have an average IQ of 40 and African-Americans an average IQ of 75 due to race mixing, A.K., a nickname he says is short for “Aryan Knight,” insists he is not a racist.

INSET: “It’s okay for them to say ‘black power, black pride, brown pride,’ whatever, but as soon as somebody says, ‘white power, white pride,’ then we’re a racist arrogant redneck hillbilly bigot.” — Parker

the

MONSTER next door <<< FROM PREVIOUS includes historical inaccuracies, propaganda and opinions most would deem racist.

This is America. Ken Parker is an American man.

As a child, Parker dreamed of becoming an astronaut. But when he learned that astronauts had to spend the better part of a decade training before they got to hear the words “blast off ” from inside a shuttle, he abandoned his dream and eventually enlisted in the Navy. After serving his country for 11 years, Parker found himself coming into his 30s, married to a woman he says was heavily into pharmaceuticals and living without the purpose and direction that characterizes military service. One stormy night in St. Marys, Georgia six years ago, as the couple watched an episode of Gangland that featured skinheads and Klansmen, Parker’s wife suggested he join the KKK as it seemed “right up [his] alley.”

“I’d always been interested in the Klan since I was a little kid,” Parker says.

On the White Knights’ website, he learned that the group, which refers to itself as a “brotherhood” and “family,” insists it isn’t a hate group – according to its website, that’s a lie the “liberal media” tells – but does “hate drugs, homosexuality, abortion and racemixing, because these things go against God’s law and they are destroying all white nations.”

The website refers to individuals whose genetic background includes more than one race as “mongrels,” gives white people credit for “all which is great in the world today,” and calls on

white Christians to join them in the fight against the “Communist[s] who have stolen our nation.”

The message resonated. Parker dove right in, even though he says his wife ran off when he attended his first rally because she found out the group is opposed to drugs (he says alcohol is also off the menu for members). He shrugs, implying that it was no big thing to sacrifice his marriage to join the KKK. Parker quickly distinguished himself with the White Knights, telling FW he became a Grand Dragon three years after joining. When he moved to Jacksonville, he says he was

communism. They killed over 60 million Aryans in the German Empire,” he explains.

(There were a small number of Jews involved with the Russian Bolshevik revolution in 1917, which gave rise to the Soviet Union. But the Library of Congress reports that the Soviet Union was the first ideologically atheist state and, through its attacks on the religion, made the organized practice of Judaism “almost impossible.”

Other than blogs and faux news sites, there is no evidence that after WWII the Bolsheviks killed 60 million whites in Germany, which

Northeast Florida is home to the Southern National Congress, a neo-Confederate group based in Alabama that advocates for the South to secede from the Union (again), and the New Black Panther Party, a black separatist group.

named Grand Dragon of the Florida “realm,” as states are known. Being surrounded by so many like-minded individuals gave him a sense of belonging; he refers to the Klan as a family, albeit a family that shares views that many would be appalled by.

Chuckling, Parker says he calls the Holocaust the “Holo-hoax” and adds that “even if it did happen,” he’s not clear on how many Jews were killed because after the war, “the numbers have fluctuated.” And if six million Jews were killed by the Nazis, he considers that a pittance for “what they’ve done to my people.”

“After WWII, all the sanctions that were placed on Germany, then you had communism coming up in Russia. The Bolshevik Jews are the ones that started

14 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | OCTOBER 26 - NOVEMBER 1, 2016

today has a population of over 80 million.)

Between deep drags of 305s, Parker denies that White Knights encourage violence. Parker says that he personally performs background checks on anyone who applies to become a member in his realm. According to him, people who lie about lengthy criminal records, have committed crimes involving children or beaten their wives are ineligible to join the White Knights. “They’re not considered for membership at all; their application goes right in the garbage. We don’t need a bunch of idiots in our organization,” he says.

But Parker just shrugs when confronted with a photo of one of his fliers that says any African-American man who dates a white woman “would be beaten with bats.”

Leafleting neighborhoods around the region with such venom is all in a day’s work for Parker; it’s just what they do.

“I don’t even know where they all threw them out at … there was like 1,600 fliers thrown out that night,” he says nonchalantly, adding that after each leafleting, the group fields hundreds of calls from both outraged people and potential recruits.

Contrasting the Nazi and KKK memorabilia, the wall behind him is decorated with professional photographs of space shuttles, images of an unfulfilled dream.

But one decoration stands out even more than the shuttles blasting off: a Hillary Clinton flier that hangs next to a Klan flag on one wall.

“Everybody thinks we’re die hard Donald Trump supporters, no, no, we’re all voting for Hillary,” he says, shaking his head. “… He’s a goofball. How the hell is he gonna make Mexico pay for a wall? He can’t do that.”

According to Parker, Trump angered the Klan when he spoke out against David Duke after Duke endorsed him — but Duke, a former Grand Wizard, isn’t in their good graces, either, Parker says, because after he was kicked out of the Klan 30 years ago, Duke “turned his back” on them. It’s a kind of “the enemy of my enemy who thinks my enemy is my friend is my enemy” logic.

Parker claims that he supports Clinton because the government providing social services and funding keeps black people down; he later sneers about people with “Obamaphones” who live in subsidized housing and receive welfare. He then says that, as a national socialist (like the Nazi Party of Germany), he supports putting “programs in place to help [white people] out.”

No matter who he’s voting for, one thing is certain: Parker does not consider himself a liberal.

“I’m going to school full time and it’s amazing how stupid these liberals are. It’s ridiculous,” he says, chuckling. “They don’t

even understand the fact that Hillary Clinton has been against gay marriage since day one. I think it was 2012 she finally said she supported same sex marriage.”

Clinton told The New York Times in 1999 that marriage was between a man and a woman but that “same-sex unions should be recognized and that same-sex unions should be entitled to all the rights and privileges that every other American gets.” Since then, she has become an unequivocal supporter of gay marriage.

M

ark Potok, senior fellow with the Southern Poverty Law Center, which tracks and reports on the activities of hate groups, doesn’t believe the Klan sincerely endorses Hillary Clinton.

“My opinion is that he is just angling for publicity … the other possibility is that he’s trying to hurt Clinton by linking her to the Klan,” Potok tells FW in a telephone conversation.

The rhetoric spouted by Donald Trump has brought groups like the White Knights out of the woodwork, Potok says, giving them a sense of normalcy and acceptance that they have long been without.

From 2014 to 2015, when Trump began campaigning in earnest, the SPLC tracked a 14 percent increase in hate groups nationwide.

According to the center’s Hate Map, as of 2015, there are 892 hate groups in the U.S. “Florida, by our count last year, had 58 groups, hate groups, that’s the third-highest in the country,” Potok says.

Of the states, Florida consistently ranks in the top three in terms of how many hate groups are active within the state; Potok says that these groups are particularly prevalent in the central and northern parts of the state.

The center reports that Northeast Florida is home to the Southern National Congress, a neo-Confederate group that advocates for the South to secede from the Union (again), and the New Black Panther Party, a black separatist group whose leaders have repeatedly spouted anti-Semitic, anti-white rhetoric. The Nation of Islam, another black separatist group which believes the Earth was once ruled by giant black scientists, one of whom created the white race out of intrinsically evil chemicals, has also been rumored to have a handful of members in the area. According to Parker, the National Socialist Movement, which the center refers to as “the largest neo-Nazi group in the country,” also has a small contingent of members.

Parker claims the White Knights have 12,000 members nationwide, 2,000 in Florida and 1,500 members in Jacksonville alone.

“If you look back to the Civil Rights era, St. Augustine and Jacksonville, they were a stronghold for Klansmen,” Parker says.

“Jacksonville’s actually a really easy place to recruit because you have a lot of people that hold them same beliefs and ideals, they just didn’t think there was a group around.”

Potok doesn’t buy it.

“Let me tell you that they are lying through their teeth. This is a group that has claimed to brought in tens of thousands of members … if they have 200 members nationwide, I would be surprised,” Potok says. “They’re trying very hard to give the appearance of being a really big Klan group, but they’re not.”

Parker insists that the SPLC is wrong.

The organization wrote that the group is extremely violent and published an email alleged to be from Barker in which he brags about members inciting violence at an anti-immigration demonstration in Anaheim, California last February, writing, “[W]e just had a fight between our members and communist. our members stabbed 3 in California. [sic]” Numerous news reports from the time confirm the stabbings and the White Knights’ involvement with the protest.

In the report, “Lifting the Hood: Inside the Most Extreme Klan in America,” Hope Not Hate also published a batch of names and photos of alleged members of the White

Knights and said it planned to out hundreds of members in coming months.

Upon learning about the infiltration, FW reached out to Parker via Facebook messenger correspondence with a profile he maintains under a pseudonym. He confirmed that Hope Not Hate had infiltrated the White Knights and was revealing members’ identities, but said that that since we’d last spoken, he had left the group due to a dispute between Barker and his girlfriend and some of the things that he’d read in the press that made him believe that Barker was an FBI informant with a long criminal record and violent history. Now Parker is in the National Socialist Movement.

He agreed to a follow-up interview following Bill Clinton’s Oct. 21 speech at the Downtown public library, which he attended. Twice Clinton’s speech was interrupted by protestors yelling, “Bill Clinton is a rapist.” Parker was one of those protestors. His companion, A.K., a higher-up in NSM, was the other.

Once they finish protesting on the corner of Main and Duval Streets after Clinton’s speech, we meet at the Starbucks in Riverside. A.K., a pseudonym he says stands for “Aryan Knight,” does most of the talking while Parker, clad in a shirt on

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O

n Oct. 16, the British antiracism organization Hope Not Hate reported that over the course of 15 months, it had infiltrated the White Knights via web correspondence with its “notorious and violent leader” Chris Barker.

OCTOBER 26 - NOVEMBER 1, 2016 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | 15

the

<<< FROM PREVIOUS

“If you look back to the Civil Rights era, St. Augustine and Jacksonville, they were a stronghold for Klansmen,” Ken says. “Jacksonville’s actually a really easy place to recruit because you have a lot of people that hold them same beliefs and ideals.”

which he’s written, “Bill Clinton is a rapist,” and carrying a sign that says the same, nods eagerly along. It’s clear that A.K. is the dominant in their relationship; at one he point he chastises Parker for bringing the sign to the coffee shop patio.

Parker had originally asked that his last name be withheld; it is at this meeting that he volunteers to be identified by both his first and last name – perhaps because his identity is likely to be revealed by Hope Not Hate in coming months, anyway. A.K. does not make the same offer.

A.K., who says he’s a disabled 50-yearold Army combat veteran who sold a multi-million dollar bodyguard business and retired 10 years ago, explains that the biggest difference between the White Knights and NSM is that the latter does not have a religious requirement. He also says the group is not a Nazi organization.

A.K. strongly believes that many world affairs are controlled by Jewish people, who, with assistance and acquiescence of those in power, have rewritten history to fit with a narrative that conceals this fact. He knows things that others don’t, he says, because he researches history in the library. “Don’t take what the schools are pushing down your throat,” he says, urging FW to look into some of his claims. As to the Holocaust, he says, “I know for a fact it did not happen.”

But they insist they’re not conspiracy theorists.

“No, I laugh at those guys,” A.K. says.

“We go back to the hotel and drink beer and make fun of them,” Parker adds. A.K. quickly interjects that he doesn’t drink.

A.K. likens NSM to a political party and says their goal is to have representatives from their party in government. He says that there are two Jacksonville City Councilpersons and one Florida representative to Congress who are affiliated with the group – secretly, of course. They present no further evidence to substantiate these claims.

According to A.K. and Parker, there are approximately 15 locals currently involved with NSM but the group has taken a page from Parker’s KKK recruitment playbook to increase membership. They claim they are the ones responsible for throwing out antiSemitic fliers that said, “Take America back from the Jews!” at the Jewish Community Alliance and two nearby synagogues in Mandarin on Sept. 26.

News4Jax obtained another flier from that leafleting that said, “America is being controlled by the Jews. They are plotting the minds of our American government, America sends billions in foreign aid to

MONSTER next door

“All these idiots out there talking on their Obama phones, living in Section 8 housing, selling crack cocaine, they’re going to vote liberal all the time because they’re going to end up getting more freebies.

They shouldn’t be allowed to vote.” — Parker 16 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | OCTOBER 26 - NOVEMBER 1, 2016

Israel and we suffer the consequences.

This is what your tax dollars pay for!” The fliers included contact information and the web address for NSM.

T

he tone of the election season has cast a spotlight on discontent and unrest among certain groups like NSM and the White Knights whose members believe that America is headed in a dangerous direction.

Many have blamed the recent surge of hate groups on Donald Trump for whipping people into a frothy outrage with statements and Tweets that ring with fascist undertones, issuing what has been referred to as a “dog whistle” to extremists.

Reading these groups’ websites, one gets the sense of a darkened, musty room in which a hunched figure pecks at a keyboard in fervent spurts, wild-eyed, mumbling and rocking back and forth between typing jags. It’s stream-ofconsciousness propaganda dressed up with religion, love, peace and brotherhood.

If you are trying to lure an unhappy, lonely, isolated individual who is susceptible to suggestion, there’s a certain genius to the blend of truth and fiction that these groups put forward as fact. There’s just enough real

camouflaging the unreal that, if you honestly don’t know better and are inclined to believe farfetched conspiracy theories, you might buy into notions such as Parker’s belief that the Native American peoples “weren’t good stewards of the environment.”

Parker claims that the White Knights have members from all walks of life, from fast-food workers to police and members of the judiciary. But some may find it hard to imagine an educated intellectual believing — as Parker does — that centuries ago Jewish people infiltrated Catholicism and altered the New Testament to put more loving, accepting words in Jesus Christ’s mouth.

More recently, some have wondered whether it is not racism, xenophobia and nationalism that have agitated people like Parker to the point of pining for a revolution; rather, perhaps being involved with a hate group provides an outlet for their anger at missing out on the withering American dream. Last year, Pew Research Center reported that, for the first time in four decades, the majority of Americans are no longer in the middle class. Millennials are the first generation that will worker harder and longer to make less money than their parents and grandparents.

Thinking of the source of his discontent and anger in this light, the way Parker longs for the good ol’ days when people like him were in charge is almost sad; born in 1980 on the cusp between Gen X and Millennials, Parker wants to turn back the clock to make things “right” again. This longing to return to the ways things used to be frequently appears in the propaganda of hate groups.

In furtherance of this goal, SPLC reports that in April, dozens of white supremacist groups, including the White Knights and NSM, formed the Aryan National Alliance.

SPLC reports that, “[ANA’s] stated mission was to create an ‘ethnostate’ where ‘each racial

group’ could ‘govern themselves according to their culture and ethnic self interest.’”

With their forces converged, it is likely the members of ANA are hoping to accomplish something bigger than getting their names in the press by leafleting, protesting and isolated incidences of violence, which have been the most visible of their activities in recent years.

Although the SPLC considers ANA doomed to fail due to infighting and members’ egos and other systemic weaknesses, perhaps even more terrifying than an alliance of dozens of white supremacists is Potok’s assertion that there are actually far more individuals involved with the hate movement than are being tracked.

Potok says people like Dylann Roof, who perpetrated a mass shooting at an African American church in June 2015, days after he spent time on a KKK website, an attack during which he shouted propaganda contained on that website, are a large, untracked part of the hate movement, silent keyboard warriors absorbing vitriol without being actively involved with a hate-based organization.

“The group count actually understates the size of the movement,” Potok says. “…

[Roof] didn’t read newspapers, he didn’t read magazines, he didn’t watch news … everything he knew about the world, or that he thought he knew about the world, he

learned from websites.”

As monstrous as they may seem, as racist, bigoted and frightening, the Ken Parkers of the world are Americans: much of what they desire is designed – at least in their minds – to make this country a better place to live.

“You can’t watch more than five minutes of TV without seeing a commercial and almost every single commercial you see, they have mixed couples on there. They never have the stereotypical Leave It To Beaver family anymore,” Parker says. “…They’re destroying the fabric of our American society.”

Claire Goforth claire@folioweekly.com

OCTOBER 26 - NOVEMBER 1, 2016 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | 17

FOLIO A + E

SINCERELY

YOURS

W

hen The Avett Brothers were prepping to release True Sadness, Seth Avett (vocals/ guitar) penned an open letter to the band’s fans. In the letter, he wrote the album is “a patchwork quilt, both thematically and stylistically. Wherein a myriad of contrasting fabrics make perfect sense on the same plane, this album draws upon countless resources from its writers and performers... There are moments of undeniable celebration and camaraderie, others of quiet and lonely exhalation.” It’s a grandiose description, to be sure, with Mr. Avett construing the essence of the album in the same manner one might describe a James Joyce novel (or in the same way I chose to use the word “construing” when “describing” would’ve done just fine).

Despite the intricate rundown of True

Sadness, he is right in at least this plain way: The album (and, really, all of The Avett Brother’s albums) is a collection of joy and sorrow, celebration and exhalation. Call it a quilt if you want to, but it is simpler said that The Avett Brothers are able to turn the fragility of life into beautiful music in a way that drips with sincerity.

The Avett Brothers started in North Carolina as, well, brothers. Seth and Scott (vocals/banjo) began their foray into music in different bands in and around Concord, North Carolina, before they discovered there was something useful in writing songs and singing them together. After “imposing their muppet-like energy upon unsuspecting coffeeshop and barroom patrons across the state” (their words again), they were joined by bassist Bob Crawford and booked their first tour. They released A Carolina Jubilee in 2003. That album was the first indicator of the band’s brotherly harmonies and country leanings. It was also the beginning of multiple odes to pretty girls.

FILM 3D Movie Classics ARTS PBTS’ Hand to God MUSIC Twelve Hour Turn LIVE + LOCAL MUSIC CALENDAR

Avett Brothers CRY ALONG WITH YOU on True Sadness You can track their success by how their odes expand geographically from the likes of Raleigh in ’03 to Chile and San Diego on 2007’s Emotionalism. Emotionalism included cellist Joe Kwon and was perhaps the origin of the aforementioned patchwork quilt of celebration and exhalation on songs like “The Weight of Lies” and “The Ballad of Love and Hate.”

The band began a trend of poignancy and honesty on Emotionalism that caught the eye of super-producer Rick Rubin, who hopped on board for ’09’s I and Love and You. The album’s title track was the next spike in the band’s journey toward the ears and hearts of critics and fans alike.

Rubin has stayed on board for 2012’s The Carpenter, the following year’s Magpie and the Dandelion, and the group’s latest release, True Sadness. Through each album, the band has seen their craft, fan base and venue-size grow.

True Sadness continues that maturity.

Topics like humanity, divorce, integrity and how the ones we love the most may hurt us are scattered throughout the album, the quilt. The delivery, though, is expanding. There is a waltz (“May It Last”), some country yodeling that makes the subject matter somewhat more whimsical (“Divorce Separation Blues”) and the stomp-romp and fun bass line of the album’s first single, “Ain’t No Man.” In some aspects, The Avett Brothers are like many of their contemporaries who

blend harmonies and banjos. It’s a style that has taken them from the back porches of homesteads to stages across the world.

The Avett Brothers have a loyal, ardent fan base, have been photographed wearing Stetsons and cowboy boots, and have worked their asses off touring — they also tend to unite millennials and a population on the cusp of the adult contemporary portion of their lives.

However, when it comes to their ability to convey earnestness, sincerity, and a life so beautiful it can make you cry, the Avetts are in a different league. It isn’t just their hypothetical faith in humanity that has lassoed fans and critics alike; it’s the actual pitfalls and failed ventures of their own personal lives that permeate their songs and albums, creating the bond I assume they strive for when they write.

When reviewing Emotionalism in 2007, that cranky old gatekeeper Pitchfork accused The Avett Brothers of being contrived and lacking humility (they still gave it a 7.5, to be fair). However, having expressed the same sentiments over eight albums, it would be fair to disagree. The Avett Brothers have built their reputation — and career — on their ability to put pen (or quill, based on the heightened language used in the previously mentioned open letter) to paper and let the sanguine sincerity flow.

Danny Kelly mail@folioweekly.com

THE AVETT BROTHERS

7:30 p.m. Oct. 28, Veterans Memorial Arena, Downtown $34-$54, ticketmaster.com

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PG. 23 PG. 25 PG. 26 PG. 27

OCTOBER 26 - NOVEMBER 1, 2016 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | 19

CORPSES & COCKTAILS MOSH’s inaugural adult camp-in includes a cocktail hour, buffet, a Practice Safe Hex show, candy/alcohol pairings, rooftop telescoping, palm reading, tarot cards, Ouija boards, and Night of the Living Dead, in the planetarium, 6:30 p.m. on Oct. 22 until 8 a.m. Oct. 23, Museum of Science & History, 1025 Museum Cir., Southbank, $125; MOSH members 20% discount, ages 21 and older, themosh.org. Jacksonville’s Chief Medical Examiner Valerie Rao shares her experiences of dealing with the dead.

THE SCREAM PARK With more than “25,000 square feet of terror,” this Halloween destination features haunted houses – The Xperiment, Scarecrow’s Revenge, Penny Manor, The Rot – as well as escape room, carnival rides, games, hayride, music, kids zone, nightly shows, food and more. 6-10 p.m.

Oct. 27, 6 p.m.-midnight Oct. 28 and 29 and 6-11 p.m. Oct. 30 at Clay County Fairgrounds, 2493 S.R. 16, Green Cove Springs, prices vary per attraction; info@thescreampark.com.

OCTOBER19-25, 26 - NOVEMBER 1, 2016 20 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | OCTOBER 2016

JACKSONVILLE ZOO SPOOKTACULAR The family-friendly Enchanted Land has pirates and princesses. Three scare-zones: Witch’s Lair, Land of the Zombie and Dragon’s Cave. Charlie Brown & the Great Pumpkin Patch, Wizard of Oz in Range of the Jaguar, The Lands of Far Far Away, Peter Pan’s Neverland, DJs spin kidfriendly Halloween music, candy stations, jack o’lanterns, animal exhibits (giraffes, bobcats, alligators, jaguars). The Great Lawn has bounce houses and inflatable slide. 6:30-10 p.m. Oct. 21-23, 27-31.

Admission prices vary. 370 Zoo Parkway, Northside, 757-4463, jacksonvillezoo.org.

SUN-RAY CINEMA The Mummy screens on Oct. 22, Frankenstein screens Oct. 20 and 23, I Drink Your Blood Uncensored and Uncut, starring Bhaskar Roy Chowdhury, Jadin Wong and Rhonda Fultz (1970), not suitable for kids or the faint of heart, screens Oct. 27 and Dracula, starring Bela Lugosi (1931) runs Oct. 30, 1028 Park St., 5 Points, 359-0049, sunraycinema.com. Check the website for times and prices.

HALLOWEEN FANTASY FETISH BALL The Infernal Doll Factory Savage Burlesque presents its inaugural fetish burlesque theater with Inferno Inc. and legendary Gothic Industrial DJ Alex Pagan, costume contests, full liquor bar, free parking and prizes; 18 to play, 21 to drink; 9 p.m. Oct. 21 at Morocco Shrine Auditorium, 3800 St. Johns Bluff Rd. S., Southside, $10-$15.

FALL FESTIVAL San Jose Academy and Preparatory High School hold this festival, with themed booths, crafts, activities, games, costume contests, snacks, candy and prizes, 5-8 p.m. Oct. 28 at San Jose Schools, 4072 Sunbeam Rd., Mandarin, 425-1725, CONNER’S A-MAIZE-ING ACRES Moonlight wagon rides and a Fall Maze are featured, Saturdays 10 a.m.-6 p.m. through Nov. 11. “It’s the Great Pumpkin, Charlie Brown” screens Oct. 29. Field of Screams (not recommended for kids under 10), 7-10 p.m. Oct. 22, 28 and 29; $15.

19856 C.R. 121, Hilliard, 879-5453.

SMASHING PUMPKINS CLASSES AT SWEET PETE’S Make a three-dimensional chocolate jack-olantern; choose from Sweet Pete’s signature candies to fill the lanterns. Children under 15 must be accompanied by a paid adult.

Times vary; through Oct. 29, $18, 1922 N. Pearl St., Downtown, 376-7161.

ADVENTURE LANDING HAUNT NIGHTS Apocalypse 3D Clown Takeover High-tech zombie simulations, with “murderous” clowns, freaks and carnival chaos.

Pinehurst Asylum Rooms are open.

Containment The outbreak begins ... enter if you dare. Descent Explore an old tomb, see demons, ghosts, evil creatures. 7 p.m.-10 p.m., 11 p.m. or mid., Oct. 20-22, 27-31. Through Oct. 31; $12.99 and up; combo haunt $25.99; 1944 Beach Blvd., Jax Beach, 246-4386, hauntnights.com.

WAREHOUSE 31 UNLEASHED These scary haunted houses – The Asylum and The Factory – are open 7:30 p.m.-mid. Oct. 21, 22, 28 and 29; 7:3011 p.m. Oct. 20, 23, 27 and 30, 225 W. Davis Industrial Dr., St. Augustine; $15 for one house, $25 for both, $5 hayride; warehouse31unleashed.com.

CATTY SHACK RANCH HAUNTED FOREST Crafts, games, candy, Haunted Forest experience, big cats. 5-9 p.m. Oct. 21 and 28; 3-9 p.m. Oct. 22 and 29. 1860 Starratt Rd., Northside, 757-3603; $10 adults; $5 kids 3-11; free kids 2 and younger; cattyshack.org.

BEACHES TOWN CENTER HALLOWEEN PARADE The annual parade is held 10 a.m.-12:30 p.m. Oct. 22, where Atlantic Boulevard meets the ocean. Crafts, games, refreshments, a costume contest and prizes are featured.

Kids trick-or-treat in participating shops and restaurants in Beaches Town Center during and after the parade.

TRAIL OF TERROR Claiming “a resurrection 10 years in the making,” this Halloween destination bills itself as “fun for the whole family.”

Huh. With food trucks, zombie paintball range, tarot card readings, face-painting and a full bar, it’s open 7-11 p.m.

Oct. 28 and 29 and 7-10 p.m. Oct. 30 and 31 at Paintball Adventures, 11850 Camden Rd., Northside, $13-$25, 474-1114, jaxterror.com.

ZOMBIE FRIGHT NIGHTS Mandarin Road Festival offers Ground Zero of the Zombie Apocalypse, on three acres for zombie containment. Zombie Apocalypse Transport Ride, Terror Escape Route, onsite DJ and light show, zombie photo booth, horror films, rock wall, food trucks. $25/person includes entry to Zombie Fright Night and entry to all onsite attractions. 8 p.m.-mid. Oct. 22, 14159 Mandarin Rd., 424-1500, mandarinroadfestival.com.

ST. MARYS RAILROAD HALLOWEEN EXPRESS The authentic steam locomotive rides the rails to Ghost Town. Costumes encouraged. 10 a.m., noon, 2 p.m. and 4 p.m. Oct. 22 and 29, 1000 Osborne St., St. Marys; $20 adults; $17 ages 3-12; free for kids 2 and under, tickets must be purchased in advance at stmarysrailroad. com or call 912-200-5235.

DAY OF THE DEAD TEQUILA FEST The El Día de los Muertos celebration includes tequila samples, sugar skullpainting, live music and $2 tacos, 5-7 p.m. Nov. 1, BlackFinn Ameripub, 4840 Big Island Dr., Ste. 5, St. Johns Town Center, 345-3466, $10 advance, $15 at the door, blackfinnameripub.com.

NIGHT OF THE LIVING DEAD The classic horror film screens 8 p.m.

Oct. 23 at Corazon Café & Cinema, 36 Granada St., St. Augustine, 679-5736, corazoncinemaandcafe.com.

PUMPKIN GUTS The annual pumpkin carving event, for kids 11-18, is 6 p.m. Oct. 25, Southeast Branch Library, 6670 U.S. 1 S., St. Augustine; registration strictly enforced for this free program. Call 827-6900 or e-mail aphillips@sjcfl.us to reserve your pumpkin.

ANGIE’S SUBS ANNUAL PUMPKIN CARVING PARTY The annual Pumpkin Carving Contest & Party, with pumpkin-carving and eating contests, prizes, beverages and specials, is 6-9 p.m. Oct. 26, Angie’s Subs, 1436 Beach Blvd., Jax Beach, 249-7827, B.Y.O.P. (Bring Yer Own Pumpkin) and carving utensils.

AN AMERICAN WEREWOLF IN LONDON The classic horror film screens at 3 and 7:15 p.m. Oct. 26-30, Corazon Café & Cinema, 36 Granada St., 679-5736, corazoncinemaandcafe.com.

CREATURES OF THE NIGHT Kids can trick or treat on the walkways and meet costumed animal-keepers with creepy creatures and candy, 5:30-7 p.m., Oct. 28, 29 and 30, St. Augustine Alligator Farm Zoological Park, 999 Anastasia Blvd., 824-3337; members $9 adults, $7 ages 2-11; nonmembers $10, ages 2-11 $8, alligatorfarm.com.

THE AMERICAN WAKE TOUR Live music, grave entertainment, Oct. 30, 1904 Music Hall, 19. N. Ocean St., Downtown, americanmurdertour.com.

HAUNTED MASQUERADE ART SHOW The semi-formal masquerade featuring local artists is held 7-10 p.m. Oct. 29 at Corazon Café & Cinema, 36 Granada St., St. Augustine, 679-5736, corazoncinemaandcafe.com.

HALLOWEEN COSTUME CONTEST Ancient City Tours holds its 11th annual contest and merchant trick-or-treating on St. George Street, 2-5 p.m. Oct. 30, 6 Cordova St., St. Augustine, 827-0807, ancientcitytours.net.

ANIMAL RESCUE BARK IN THE DARK Ana’s Angels Animal Rescue holds this fundraiser and runway walk, with homemade baked cupcakes, cookies and goodies. Costumes for pets and humans encouraged. Admission $10 per family; cash only at the door. Proceeds benefit the animal rescue working to save animals with special needs; 7 p.m. Oct. 22, PetCo, 11111 San Jose Blvd., Mandarin, 254-5715.

LOCALS HALLOWEEN NIGHT This party, with a costume contest – $500 prize – plus no cover charge and DJ 007 spins, is 9 p.m. Oct. 31 at Locals Cocktail Lounge, 869 Sadler Rd., Ste. 102, Fernandina Beach, 775-5943.

GHOST TRAIN ADVENTURE Embark on a paranormal train tour, with an EMF Ghost Meter, starting at Ripley’s Believe It or Not! Museum, 19 San Marco Ave., St. Augustine, 824-1606, ghostrainadventure.com.

HALLOWEEN CANDY BUY BACKS Several dentists’ offices will buy back your candy in the spirit of good dental health. Krantz Dental Care, 12058 San Jose Blvd., Ste. 102, Mandarin and 1695 Wells Rd., Orange Park, 269-7004. Kids First Dentistry pays a dollar a pound, 10 a.m.-4 p.m. Nov. 2-13, 4495 Roosevelt Blvd., Ste. 111, Jacksonville, 423-1377, kids1dentistry.com.

SCARY LITERARY POETRY READING Ancient City Poets holds an open mic reading, 3-4:30 p.m. Oct. 30, Corazon Cinema & Café, 36 Granada St., St. Augustine. Costumes encouraged.

NE FL GHOST & PARANORMAL MEETUP GROUP This local organization provides “support and assistance for those experiencing a paranormal encounter.

Private, confidential investigations are offered to those requesting assistance with a paranormal encounter. If you believe you are haunted, you live in a haunted house or you are being visited in your sleep,” join in the research and ghosting events. The next local gathering is Nov. 6 in Green Cove Springs, a hotbed of paranormal activity. meetup. com/Northeast-Florida-Ghost-andParanormal-Meetup-Group.

Listing compiled by Marlene Dryden

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FOLIO A+E : MAGIC LANTERNS

YOU ARE IN

We honor the TRIPPY, KITSCHY realm of 3D cinema

ANOTHER DIMENSION I

have always loved 3D. One of my earliest movie memories is seeing House of Wax (1953) in one of downtown Dallas’s movie palaces and ripping off my glasses, too terrified to look, when Vincent Price (as the hideously scarred strangler) took off his own mask.

According to 3dfilmarchive.com, a fascinating and invaluable resource of information about 3D history, there were exactly 50 domestic features filmed in the three-dimensional process during the Golden Age, roughly 1952-’55. For dedicated fans like me, it is an absolute joy that (slowly but surely) more and more of these films (mostly minor, but some major) are available in the home market. Among the Blu-rays already out are Hitchcock’s Rear Window, the musical Kiss Me, Kate (with Bob Fosse among the dancers), the science-fiction thriller Gog, and Rita Hayworth in Miss Sadie Thompson.

Two new films from the 3D Golden Age have recently joined the ranks, neither with much fanfare. However, interested viewers and fans of the process might want to track down a copy for their library. Of such manias are film freaks like me possessed.

Man in the Dark, a mostly forgotten late film-noir title, bears the historical distinction of being the first 3D feature film released by a major studio (Columbia, in this case), rushed into production to beat Warner Brothers’ House of Wax to the big screen. Filmed in 11 days, Man in the Dark beat the Vincent Price classic to the big screen by 48 hours.

Starring Edmond O’Brien (1955 Best Supporting Actor Oscar winner in The Barefoot Contessa), the film is about cheap hood Steve Rawley who, at the film’s start, undergoes an experimental operation to quell his criminal tendencies. (Better that, he decides, than time in the slammer). The operation is a success, but naturally there’s a fly in the ointment — several of them, in fact, including an ex-girlfriend (’50s bad girl Audrey Totter) and Steve’s former buddies who want to know where he stashed the dough from an earlier robbery.

Steve, however, can’t remember. At first, anyway. As his memories slowly begin to rise to the surface, prompted by a visit to an amusement park, Steve’s girlfriend discovers she likes the new reformed Steve better than the old thug.

Trying to find the money, avoiding getting killed by those erstwhile pals and being caught by the cops, Steve has his hands full while the viewer is treated to several in-your-face 3D gimmicks.

The thrilling conclusion, with a chase across a rollercoaster, is the film’s high point and (together with the 3D) the producers’ major marketing ploy. Hitchcock used a similar setting to even better effect in Strangers on a Train, but Lew Landers, the director of Man in the Dark, was no Hitchcock. Still, Man in the Dark is an interesting late entry in the film noir canon, and O’Brien was always a talented performer. And the 3D is excellent!

The 3D/2D Blu-ray has been released

by Twilight Time, a subdivision of Screen

Archives, and is limited to a print run of 3,000 copies. It’s a bit pricey, like all of Twilight Time’s titles, but the online site occasionally features special sales, bringing the cost down to a more reasonable range of $10-$20. For us 3D nuts, it’s still a bargain.

The second new 3D release from the Golden Age is an even better film available at an absolutely terrific price. Currently an exclusive product from Best Buy, It Came from Outer Space (1953) is one of the best-beloved sci-fi films of the ’50s. With a story by Ray Bradbury and direction from the great Jack Arnold (Tarantula, Creature from the Black Lagoon and The Incredible Shrinking Man), the film is a genuine classic of the genre, 3D or not.

Richard Carlson plays an amateur astronomer who, with his girlfriend Ellen (Barbara Rush), witnesses the crash of a meteor in the Arizona desert. Rushing to the site, the intrepid scientist discovers that the object is actually an alien vessel, but after the crater is covered by a landslide, no one in the nearby community believes him.

Then there are the aliens. Not really hostile, they are still so hideous-looking that they take to replicating human bodies (not unlike the later Invasion of the Body Snatchers) while they try to repair their ship. The film’s tantalizing glimpses of the monsters are among its most memorable effects.

One of the film’s many fans is Steven Spielberg, who has credited It Came from Outer Space as his inspiration for Close Encounters of the Third Kind. That alone is quite a substantial endorsement.

As with Man in the Dark, the 3D is also excellent, making It Came from Outer Space an absolute delight for both fans and collectors.

Pat McLeod mail@folioweekly.com

NOW SHOWING SUN-RAY CINEMA The Girl on the Train and Jack Reacher: Never Go Back are currently screening, 1028 Park St., 5 Points, 359-0049, sunraycinema. com. Dracula runs Oct. 27 and 30. I Drink Your Blood Uncensored and Uncut is screened – or is that SCREAMED? – on Oct. 27. Miss Hokusai and Little Sister start on Oct. 28. The Invisible Man screens on Oct. 29.

Doctor Strange starts Nov. 3.

CORAZON CINEMA & CAFÉ The Little Shop of Horrors starts Oct. 26; Indignation starts Oct. 28. The classic horror film (or is it a comedy?) An American Werewolf in London screens 3 and 7:15 p.m. Oct. 26-30. The Others runs for Throwback Thursday at noon Oct. 27.

The Green Series continues with Sonic Sea, 7 p.m. Oct. 27. Haunted Masquerade is held Oct. 29. Scary Sunday series continues 8 p.m. Oct. 30. 36 Granada St., St. Augustine, 679-5736, corazoncinemaandcafe.com.

IMAX THEATER Jack Reacher: Never Go Back, Deepwater Horizon, Robots 3D, America Wild: National Parks Adventure, A Beautiful Planet and Secret Ocean screen at World Golf Village IMAX Theater, St. Augustine, 940-4133, worldgolfimax.com. Inferno IMAX 2D starts Oct. 28. Fantastic Beasts & Where to Find Them starts Nov. 17.

ARTS + EVENTS PERFORMANCE

HAND TO GOD Players by the Sea stages Robert Askins’ darkly comic play, about the forces of good and evil battling in Texas, with sock puppets in the cast, at 8 p.m. Nov. 4 & 5, 10-12, 17-19 and 2 p.m. Nov. 13, 106 Sixth St. N., Jax Beach, 249-0289, $23, playersbythesea.org.

GOD OF CARNAGE Flagler College’s Department of Theatre Arts stages this comedy, written by Yasmina Reza and translated by Christopher Hampton, about a testy encounter between two parents that reveals truths about humanity, at 7:30 p.m. Oct. 26-29 and 2 p.m. Oct. 30 at the school’s Lewis Auditorium, 14 Granada St., St. Augustine, 826-8600, $15, flagler.university.com.

MAGIC MEN LIVE! Hubba hubba! This all-hunky male revue brings the phenomenon of Magic Mike, Fifty Shades of Grey and other stud-muffin delights to the stage at 8 p.m. Oct. 28 at The Florida Theatre, 128 E. Forsyth St., Downtown, 355-2787, $23.50-$78.50, floridatheatre.com.

ANNIE GET YOUR GUN Alhambra Theatre & Dining presents the raucous musical about a young woman who never misses her target; through Nov. 20. Dinner 6 p.m.; brunch noon; themed menu by Executive Chef DeJuan Roy; Alhambra Theatre & Dining, 12000 Beach Blvd., Southside, $35-$62 plus tax, 641-1212, alhambrajax.com.

THE ROCKY HORROR SHOW The third annual production of the campy musical, about a sassy mad scientist, is staged 7:30 p.m. Oct. 27-29, Amelia Musical Playhouse, 1955 Island Walkway, Fernandina, 277-3455; audience participation is encouraged (no meat, please!); not for those younger than 16; ameliamusicalplayhouse.com.

MACBETH Atlantic Beach Experimental Theatre, celebrating 25 years of community theater, stages Shakespeare’s revered drama about the price of political ambition, 8 p.m.

Oct. 28 and 29; Nov. 4 and 5; 2 p.m. Oct. 30 and Nov. 6, Adele Grage Cultural Center, 716 Ocean Blvd., Atlantic Beach, 249-7177, abettheatre.com.

CREATIVE WRITING SENIOR PUBLIC READING Douglas Anderson School of the Arts’ annual reading is held 8 a.m.

Oct. 27 at Museum of Contemporary Art, 333 N. Laura St., Downtown, 346-5620, duvalschools.org.

CHOOSY SUZY’S BULLY PREVENTION SHOW Geared toward grades K-6, blending humor and magic, is on at 10:30 a.m. Nov. 2 at Thrasher-Horne Center for the Arts, 283 College Dr., Orange Park, 276-6750, $12, thcenter.org.

CLASSICAL & JAZZ

FALL PERCUSSION CONCERT The UNF Percussion Ensemble performs 7 p.m. Oct. 27 at University of North Florida’s Robinson Theater, 1 UNF Dr., Southside, 620-2878, unf.edu/coas/music/calendar.aspx.

LINDSEY STIRLING Violinist Stirling, who combines eclectic music and dance into her stage show, performs 8 p.m. Oct. 27 at The Florida Theatre, 128 E. Forsyth St., Downtown, 355-2787, $29.50-$69.50, floridatheatre.com.

UF BRAZILIAN MUSIC TRIO Friday Musicale presents the trio, featuring Ulisses Rocha (violão/guitar), Welson Tremura (voice, cavaquinho and violão) and Larry Crook, (pandeiro and Brazilian percussion), 11 a.m. and 7:30 p.m. Oct. 28 at 645 Oak St., Riverside, 355-7584, fridaymusicale.com.

INTERCOLLEGIATE CHORAL FESTIVAL Choirs from Edward Waters College, Florida State College at Jacksonville, and The University of North Florida perform at 7:30 p.m. Oct.

28 at Jacksonville University’s Terry Concert Hall, 2800 University Blvd. N., Arlington, 256-7386, arts.ju.edu.

MARIO LANZA – HOLLYWOOD The First Coast Opera presents the musical revue, a celebration of the iconic 20th-century tenor Lanza, 7:30 p.m. Oct. 28 at Lightner Museum, 75 King St., St. Augustine, $35; $10 students, firstcoastopera.com.

RARESONG THREE The inventive trio – Patricia DeWitt (recorder, viola da gamba, soprano), Peter DeWitt (harpsichord, recorder, tenor) and Marcy Brenner (viola da gamba) – perform “An Italian Conquest in Imperial England,” featuring Elizabethan and Jacobean Renaissance music, 5 p.m. Oct. 29 at Grace United Methodist Church, 8 Carrera St., St. Augustine, 8298272, gracestaugustine.org.

JU PERCUSSION ENSEMBLE SCORES NOSFERATU Jacksonville University percussion professor Tony Steve and the JU Percussion Ensemble present a live score to the original vampire flick, F.W. Murnau’s 1922 masterpiece, Nosferatu, 7:30 p.m. Oct. 30 at Jacksonville University’s Terry Concert Hall, 256-7386, $10; $5 seniors, military, students, ages 17 and under, arts.ju.edu.

ABBAS ABOUD Iraqi pianist Aboud performs at 7:30 p.m.

Nov. 1 at Jacksonville University’s Terry Concert Hall, 2567386, $25, arts.ju.edu.

LAWSON ENSEMBLE CONCERT Ellen Olson, viola, and Eric Olson, oboe, are featured at 7:30 p.m. Nov. 1 at University of North Florida’s Recital Hall, 620-2878, unf.edu/coas/music/ calendar.aspx.

AMELIA ISLAND JAZZ FESTIVAL The Amelia Island Jazz Festival – rescheduled due to Hurricane Matthew – returns with music by University of North Florida Jazz Ensemble directed by Dennis Marks, The Dynamic Les DeMerle Little Big Band with Bonnie Eisele, Trio Caliente, saxophonist Houston Person, and Bria Skonberg, along with jam sessions and a jazz brunch, Nov. 2-6, at various venues in Fernandina Beach. For a full schedule of events and ticket details, go to ameliaislandjazzfestival.com.

COMEDY

FRED’S FUNNIEST COMEDIANS Spence, Tommy Torres, others, perform at 7:30 p.m. Oct. 26 at The Comedy Zone, 3130 Hartley Rd., Mandarin, 292-4242, $10, comedyzone.com.

ADAM FERRARA Comedian Ferrara, known for starring turns in Rescue Me and Nurse Jackie, is on 7:30 p.m. Oct. 27; 7:30 and 9:45 p.m. Oct. 28 and 29, The Comedy Zone, $20-$22.50, comedyzone.com.

FLORIDA’S FUNNIEST COMPETITION Comedians duke it out at 8 p.m. Oct. 28 at The Comedy Club of Jacksonville, 11000 Beach Blvd., Southside, 646-4277, $13-$25, jacksonvillecomedy.com.

RYAN DAVIS MASQUERADE BALL Comedian Davis, a viral Internet celeb, appears 8 p.m. Oct. 29, The Comedy Club of Jacksonville; costume contest for staff and customers, $15-$30, jacksonvillecomedy.com.

DARREN KNIGHT Comedian Knight, considered the next star of redneck comedy (or as the French say, cou rouge comédie) is on 7:30 p.m. Nov. 1 and 2, The Comedy Zone, $25, comedyzone.com.

CALLS & WORKSHOPS

APEX THEATRE STUDIO ONE-DAY WORKSHOPS Makenzie Vaughn holds the workshop, 10 a.m.-2 p.m. Oct. 29 at 5150 Palm Valley Rd., Ponte Vedra; Alexis Black teaches a

LINDSEY STIRLING, who combines choreographed violin performances with musical styles running the gamut from Classical to EDM, performs Oct. 27 at The Florida Theatre, Downtown.

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ARTS + EVENTS stage combat course, 10:30 a.m.-1 p.m. Nov. 11; classes $35; limited to 12 students/class. Proceeds benefit the studio’s Grab The Mic fundraiser for stage production sound equipment at Ponte Vedra Concert Hall. Details/register at apextheatrejax.com.

NEW TOWN URBAN FARM Urban Geoponics and New Town are developing a large community garden at Pearce and West Third streets, in the New Town/Edward Waters area, Northside. It will provide fresh produce and a hands-on, open-air center of learning for the community and area students. Urban Farm meets 10 a.m.-1 p.m. every Sun. Details, call Diallo-Sekou at 706-284-9808.

ART WALKS & MARKETS

FIRST WEDNESDAY ART WALK The downtown art walk, held 5-9 p.m. Nov. 2 and every first Wed., features more than 13 live music venues, more than 13 hotspots open after 9 p.m. and 50 total participating venues, spanning 15 blocks in Downtown Jacksonville. iloveartwalk.com.

RIVERSIDE ARTS MARKET Filipino Pride Day, featuring cuisine, music by internationally known headliners, is held 11 a.m.-8:30 p.m. Oct. 29 under the Fuller Warren Bridge, 715 Riverside Ave., free admission, 389-2449, riversideartsmarket.com.

FERNANDINA BEACH MARKET PLACE Fresh produce, local art, live music, 9 a.m.-1 p.m. every Sat., North Seventh Street, Fernandina, 557-8229, fernandinabeachmarketplace.com.

UPTOWN SATURDAY NIGHT The self-guided tour features galleries, antique stores and shops open from 5-9 p.m. every last Sat. in St. Augustine’s San Marco District, 824-3152.

MUSEUMS

AMELIA ISLAND MUSEUM OF HISTORY 233 S. Third St., Fernandina, 261-7378, ameliamuseum.org. It Came from the Attic: The Lesesne House is currently on display.

CUMMER MUSEUM OF ART & GARDENS 29 Riverside Ave., 356-6857, cummermuseum.org. Chief curator Holly Kerris leads the tour and discussion, “Ponce de León Society Folk Couture: Fashion and Folk Art Celebration & South Galleries Permanent Collection Special Viewing,” 6-8 p.m. Oct. 26. Folk Couture: Fashion & Folk Art, works by 13 artists inspired by Folk Art Museum, through Jan. 1. Lift: Contemporary Expressions of the African American Experience, works of local artists Thony Aiuppy, Glendia Cooper, Ingrid Damiani, Overstreet Ducasse, Dustin Harewood, Marsha Hatcher, Hiromi Moneyhun, Princess Rashid, Chip Southworth, Roosevelt Watson III, through Feb. 12.

MUSEUM OF CONTEMPORARY ART JACKSONVILLE 333 N. Laura St., 366-6911, mocajacksonville.unf.edu.

Kids ages 3-12 receive free admission with a general admission paying adult starting at 11 a.m. Nov. 1 and 2.

Retro-Spective: Analog Photography in a Digital World, contemporary photographers exploring 19th-century photographic processes, through Jan. 8. Sustain: Clay to Table, pairing handcrafted ceramic tableware by North American artists with sustainable, community-based food production, through Oct. 30. Project Atrium: Ethan Murrow through Oct. 30.

WORLD GOLF HALL OF FAME & MUSEUM 1 World Golf Pl., St. Augustine, 940-4133, worldgolfhalloffame.org. Grace & Grit – Women Champions Through the Years is on display.

GALLERIES

THE ART CENTER GALLERY Jacksonville Landing, Ste. 139, 233-9252, tacjacksonville.org. The Little Rembrandts Show, artwork by kids in grades K-8, is on display through Dec. 2.

Beth Haizlip is the featured artist.

BUTTERFIELD GARAGE ART GALLERY 137 King St., St. Augustine, 825-4577, butterfieldgarage.com. Landscape and still lifes by Rebecca Shaffer, Karen F. Rose, Jessie Cook display through Nov. 1.

CRISP-ELLERT ART MUSEUM 48 Sevilla St., St. Augustine, 826-8530, flagler.edu/news-events/crisp-ellertart-museum. Auditory-themed exhibit Sound, through Nov. 22. Experimental sound artist Olivia Block performs 7 p.m.

Oct. 26.

THE CULTURAL CENTER AT PONTE VEDRA BEACH 50 Executive Way, 280-0614, ccpvb.org. Splashes of a Colorful Life, abstract works by Dottie Dorion, and Shadows, turned wood works by Ed Malesky, are on display through Nov. 11.

DEERWOOD CENTER CAMPUS FSCJ, 9911 Old Baymeadows Rd., 997-2500, fscj.edu. Don Martin: Leaves of Grass, inspired by Whitman’s poem, displays through Dec. 1.

FLORIDA MINING GALLERY 5300 Shad Rd., Southside, 535-7252, floridamininggallery.com. Jason John: Crossing the Threshold of Self displays.

HUBLEY GALLERY 804 Anastasia Blvd., St. Augustine, 429-9769. Mary Hubley’s Toescape displays.

KENT CAMPUS GALLERY FSCJ, 3939 Roosevelt Blvd., 646-2300, fscj.edu. An exhibit of abstract painting by Virginia Cantore and furniture by Peter Blunt displays through Nov. 14.

KARPELES MANUSCRIPT LIBRARY MUSEUM 101 W. First St., Springfield, 356-2992, rain.org/~karpeles/jax. html. The Wright Brothers, through Dec. 30. Vinnie Ream

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Exhibit, works in art, poetry, prose and music, through Oct. 30.

MONROE GALLERIES 40 W. Monroe St., Downtown, 8810209, monroegalleries.com. The photography of Amanda Rosenblatt and UNF photo club and live music by Stank Sauce are featured 5-9 p.m. Nov. 2. Works by Jami Childers, Barbie Workman, Amber Angeloni, Zara Harriz, Amber Bailey and First Coast Plein Air Painters are displayed.

MONYA ROWE GALLERY 4 Rohde Ave., St. Augustine, monyarowegallery.com. Tropic Apparition, new works by painter Amy Lincoln, are on display through Dec. 18.

NASSAU COUNTY LIBRARY 25 N. Fourth St., Fernandina, 277-7365, nassaureads.com. The Art of the Japanese Print, from the Christine and Paul Meehan Collection, is on display through Dec. 30.

PLUM GALLERY 10 Aviles St., St. Augustine, 825-0069, plumartgallery.com. New works by painter Sara Pedigo and assemblage artist Barbara J. Cornett display through February.

SOUTHLIGHT GALLERY Bank of America Tower, 50 N. Laura St., Ste. 150, 438-4358, southlightgallery.com. The cooperative gallery has original works by more than 20 area artists, in various media.

STELLERS GALLERY 240 A1A N., Ste. 13, Ponte Vedra, 2736065, stellersgallery.com. An exhibit of recent works by Jim Draper, Henry Von Genk III and Thomas Hager, is currently on display.

ST. AUGUSTINE ART ASSOCIATION 22 Marine St., 8242310, staaa.org. The 15th annual Tactile Art Show displays through Oct. 30.

THRASHER-HORNE CENTER FOR THE ARTS 283 College Dr., Orange Park, 276-6750, thcenter.org. New works by David Ouellette and Jennifer Tallerico are on display through Dec. 14.

UNF NORTH GALLERY OF ART Founders Hall, Bldg. 2, Room 1001, 1 UNF Dr., Southside, 620-2534, unf.edu/ gallery. The Pre[Serve] Juried Exhibition is on display through Nov. 18.

EVENTS

FSCJ SGA HOSTS 4TH CONGRESSIONAL

DISTRICT DEBATE Florida State College at Jacksonville’s Student Government Association hosts a general debate for Florida’s 4th Congressional District, with confirmed attendance by David E. Bruderly (Democrat), Gary L. Koniz, (Independent) and Daniel Murphy (Write-In); moderated

by FSCJ professor of history and political science Cynthia Gardner Counsil and FSCJ professor of history Dr. Andrew Holt. Discussion topics include education, financial, domestic and foreign affairs; 6:30-7:30 p.m. Oct. 26 at FSCJ’s Zeke Bryant Auditorium, 4501 Capper Rd., Northside, 766-6500, fscj.edu/campuses/north-campus.

UF MEN’S BASKETBALL VS. ECKERD COLLEGE EXPO GAME UF Men’s Basketball team takes on Eckerd College in an exposition game at 7 p.m. Oct. 26 at Veterans Memorial Arena, 301 A. Philip Randolph Blvd., Downtown, 630-3900, $9-$29, ticketmaster.com.

FLORIDA/GEORGIA WEEKEND While finding a ticket is about as easy as finding a human hair on Donald Trump’s corpulent crown, the Florida Georgia Weekend (Go Gators!

How ‘Bout them Dawgs?! And so forth…) remains a beerdrenched bacchanal of (rightfully) legendary proportions. A flurry of events surround this pigskin party, and wandering around RV City alone might give you a wellspring of anecdotes you can tell your therapist. Game kickoff is at 3:30 p.m. Oct. 29, EverBank Field, 1 EverBank Dr., Downtown; festivities begin Oct. 26; for a list of events, go to flga.org.

PANEL DISCUSSION ON POLITICAL CORRECTNESS OneJax presents this panel discussion, which addresses the questions regarding political correctness stifling free speech, featuring Frank Denton (editor, The Florida Times-Union), Melissa Ross, (host/producer, WJCT’s First Coast Connect), Michael Boylan (president/CEO, WJCT), Mickee Brown (principal consultant), Nyah Vanterpool (coordinator, OneVoice), and moderator John A. Delaney (UNF president), 7-8:30 p.m. Oct. 27 at UNF’s Herbert University Center, 12000 Alumni Dr., 620-1529; free event, registration required; go to webapps.unf.edu/ eticket/politicallycorrect.

JAX BY JAX SAMPLER READING TWO Jax by Jax presents its second sampling reading by local authors, including Sohrab Fracis, Fred Dale, Nan Kavanaugh and Tim Gilmore, noon-1 p.m. Oct. 28 at Jessie Ball DuPont Center, 40 E. Adams St., Downtown, jaxbyjax.com.

BEER, BASS & BBQ FESTIVAL The Beer, Bass & BBQ Festival, celebrating Florida-Georgia weekend, has live entertainment, beer, Miami bass music, pep rally and barbecue, 4 p.m.-midnight Oct. 28 and noon-midnight Oct. 29 at Hemming Park, 117 W. Duval St., Downtown, hemmingpark.org.

JACKSONVILLE ARMADA VS. TAMPA BAY ROWDIES Local football faves Jacksonville Armada take on the Tampa Bay Rowdies, 4 p.m. Oct. 30, Community First Park, Baseball Grounds, Downtown, $15-$60, 633-6100, ticketmaster.com. _____________________________________________ To list an event, send time, date, location (street address, city), admission price, contact number to print to Daniel A. Brown – email dbrown@folioweekly.com or mail, 45 W. Bay St., Ste. 103, Jacksonville FL 32202. Items run as space is available. Deadline noon Wed. for next Wed. printing.

FOLIO A+E : ARTS PBTS tries its hand at Robert Askins’ PUPPET-EXORCISING romp

MASTERS OF SOCK

PUPPETS M

Aside from being noteworthy for its ore than halfway through the second exploration of unholy themes, Hand to God has post-Millennium decade, even as also been praised for being downright hilarious. advancements in technology have “The reception the play deserves is the increased both the capabilities of, and one it gets nightly at the Booth [Theatre]: consumers’ access to, visual entertainments, roars of gleeful laughter,” said Timeout New it’s interesting to note that some of the most York. And The New York Daily News wrote commercially enduring productions have that the play was “so ridiculously raunchy, been presented in a medium that’s long been irreverent and funny, it’s bound to leave you considered antiquated. As 2011’s Book of sore from laughing.”

Mormon sets out to traverse the country once Meanwhile, Askins – who studied again and this year’s runaway smash Hamilton at Ensemble Studio Theatre alongside begins its first run with a reshuffled cast, not emerging playwrights like the Pulitzeronly is theater relevant, it continues to offer nominated Amy Herzog (4,000 Miles) and some of the most provocative and subversive the Pulitzer-winning Annie Baker (The social commentary of any art form.

Flick) — has been hailed as a phenomenal Robert Askins’ hit Hand to God — which and rare talent. premiered on Broadway in 2015 — is yet Certainly the play’s capacity to relate to another example of both the vibrancy and contemporary issues was a factor in Players resonance of theater today. by the Sea’s decision to bring Hand to God to Though the play didn’t enjoy the town (the play begins a two-week run at PBTS meteoric success of Lin-Manuel Miranda’s on Nov. 4). The Jacksonville Beach-based hip-hop-infused historical account of community theater recently celebrated 50 Founding Father Alexander Hamilton, or years of putting on engaging performances of Trey Parker’s and Matt Stone’s irreverent significant, challenging and often provocative sendup of organized religion (The Book of contemporary works.

Mormon), Hand to God was still one of the For the production of Hand to God, most talked-about Broadway productions PBTS veteran Austin Farwell (A Behanding of the last half-decade. in Spokane) has assumed the lead role of The reasons for its positive critical both the teenaged Jason as well as Tyrone, reception and uneven box office success are the puppet the boy will eventually try to no mystery, as the conceit of Askins’ play is as eccentric as any popular production exorcise from his arm. Several other PBTS currently running – vets also return to the Hand to God has both a stage in this comedy, HAND TO GOD fundamentalist church including Kasi Walters 8 p.m. Nov. 4 & 5, 10-12, 17-19; 2 p.m. in rural Texas as its (also A Behanding in Nov. 13, Players by the Sea, Jax Beach, setting and a demonic Spokane) playing Jason’s $23, playersbythesea.org sock puppet as one of recently widowed its main characters. The mother, Margery, and play follows teenaged members of the church’s Rodney Holmes (Memphis) taking on the congregation as they set out to organize a role of Pastor Greg, the clergyman who calls Christian puppet show for an upcoming upon the kids to put on the puppet show in service, when Tyrone — the foul-mouthed the first place. sock puppet complete with stringy red hair Unconventional and hysterical, PBTS’s and crazed, googly eyes — announces himself production of Hand to God is bound to be to be Satan and commences trying to lead the a welcome respite from what Askins once group to sin. Along the way, puppets engage called the “phenomenally dull … poetic gradschoolery” that mass culture often ascribes in violence and sexual acts as themes of to contemporary theater, where he says often temptation, faith, addiction and the dangers “everything takes too long” and the show of repressed emotions are all explored with a “tediously explores the beauty in ourselves.” kind of dark alacrity.

“It’s not church,” Askins told the New York “You can enjoy Hand to God merely as Times in January. “Even though it feels like a festival of filthy hilarity, like The Book of church a lot when we go these days.”

Mormon,” said New York Times theater critic Other productions notwithstanding, Charles Isherwood after his third time seeing thanks to plays like Hand to God, the theater the play. “But as I watched the play [this has never been more compelling. time]… I found myself peering more closely Matthew B. Shaw into its psychological depths, and finding in it mail@folioweekly.com a weird mirror of our unsettling times.”

OCTOBER 26 - NOVEMBER 1, 2016 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | 25

FOLIO A+E : MUSIC

Iconic Jacksonville POST-HARDCORE BAND Twelve Hour Turn reunites for three shows

GETTIN’ THE BAND

BACK TOGETHER I

n the last few weeks since Hurricane Matthew, going out has taken on extra importance in Northeast Florida. Enjoying life for a hot minute — seeing a show, going to dinner, having a few drinks — is critical for survival when you’re ripping out wet flooring all day. Sorting through the belongings you have left at night. And trying to navigate the bureaucratic clusterfuck of homeowner’s insurance, flood insurance, FEMA relief and intermittent local services.

But going through the kind of mental and emotional lows familiar to so many First Coasters, from Matanzas Inlet to Fernandina Beach, can lead to the best kinds of highs — especially when we let go of our stress for a few hours and remember that all we humans are in this crazy mess together. I predict just such a gratifying, life-affirming experience this weekend, when iconic Jacksonville punk/emo/hardcore/post-whatever band Twelve Hour Turn reunite for one show in St. Augustine, one show in Jacksonville, and one show in Gainesville at The Fest 15.

Brothers Rich and Dave Diem joined John Magnifico and Matt Oliver to form Twelve Hour Turn back in 1996, when the idea of using the Internet to be successful wasn’t yet a thing and DIY values were washing over the punk rock community, especially here on the East Coast.

Gainesville label No Idea Records took a chance on the quartet, however, recognizing a vein of depth and authenticity in Twelve Hour Turn’s mix of crushing riffs and uplifting lyrics.

That spirit was cultivated at the band’s shared Magnifico House — part DIY venue, part crash pad, part studio, part iconic home base for any Jacksonville-raised ’90s punk — and it was evident on their handful of releases for No Idea, including their two stunning full-length albums, The Victory of Flight and Perfect Progress, Perfect Destruction. And that spirit of learning to do “what we loved to do, how we wanted to do it,” as Rich Diem tells Folio Weekly, has led into each band member’s life, whether as record label heads, band members, or creative forces in their respective communities.

“It was an exciting time for us,” Rich says.

“We were getting out of town for the first

26 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | OCTOBER 26 - NOVEMBER 1, 2016

time, befriending other bands, doing what we wanted to do, going on tour with a record label like No Idea behind us. And we were doing things for ourselves while feeding off other people. Mainly, we were jusst happy to be part of the story of what was going on in punk and hardcore in Florida and across the country.” Diem describes the fact that people remember Twelve Hour Turn and are excited about their second reunion (for The Fest 10 back in 2011) as “really flattering.”

And if you know anything about the preternaturally calm, ridiculously humble Diem in any capacity — as owner of Bakery Outlet Records, dedicated elementary school teacher, occasional booker and promoter of rad shows — you know that he probably doesn’t admit to being flattered very often.

He was quick to defer credit, though: “I chalk

TWELVE HOUR TURN with DREDGER, ROBES, LA PECHE, SLEEPTALKER, FAULTS

6 p.m. Oct. 27, Planet Sarbez, St. Augustine, $10, planetsarbez.com

TWELVE HOUR TURN with ROBES, LA PECHE, SLEEPTALKER, BIRTHDAY PONY, MOYA MOYA

8 p.m. Oct. 28, Rain Dogs, Riverside, $10, facebook.com/raindogsjax it up to the fact that No Idea Records has had so much longevity as a great voice for punk music over the years. So a lot of people connect the dots back through other bands to discover us, which is cool.”

Tony Weinbender, No Idea lifer and The Fest founder, laughed at Rich’s modesty. “I knew about Twelve Hour Turn before I even moved to Florida, when I was still living in Virginia,” Tony tells Folio Weekly. “We would go to Jacksonville to play shows and stay at their house, which was awesome. So we repaid the favor by inviting them up to Virginia, where they hooked up with bands like Engine Down. Whenever we do a milestone Fest, we try to get a bunch of old buds together. So Fest 10 and Fest, hell yeah, we did that with Twelve

Hour Turn. They mean a lot to a lot of people — the prime example is Joe McMahon from Smoke or Fire, who used to be on Fat Wreck Chords. He has a Twelve Hour Turn tattoo!

Weinbender says he’s particularly excited to see them play a larger room at The Fest, along with raising enough money for the band so that John Magnifico and Matt Oliver could fly in from Portland and Dave Diem could come down from Brooklyn so the band can play St. Augustine, Jacksonville and Gainesville. Rich Diem says John and Matt have practiced a few times together while he and his brother listen along on their computers, but the band will get one day of rehearsal before their first show at Planet Sarbez on Oct. 27. “We reunited one time for our friend’s wedding in Portland, then once for Fest 10, so when he asked again, it was a quicker ‘yes,’” Rich laughs.

Ditto for their latest release, a recording of their 1998 WNYU radio broadcast recorded

by Steve Roche and then released by John Massel on his Rose Quarter Records label.

“That was a special time, touring with I Hate Myself,” Rich Diem reminisces. “It was one of our first tours up the East Coast, things were picking us for us, we were excited to be making friends with people we thought were talented.”

Which really says it all about Twelve Hour Turn’s music, ethos and fans: It’s one big community of people who’ve loved each other (and each other’s music) while supporting each other (and each other’s artistic projects) for almost 20 years now.

“What we learned in Twelve Hour Turn is that we write songs because we’re friends and we love to share our music,” Rich Diem says. “Instead of paying somebody to get our music on the radio or written up in a magazine, we just played and existed, hoping people would see us and we would resound.

Because of that, we’ve always felt like we’re part of some story or narrative — some collective surrounding this kind of music and this lifestyle. That’s why we’re excited to play three more shows for our friends.”

Nick McGregor mail@folioweekly.com

Grammy Award-winning R&B artist ANTHONY HAMILTON (pictured) performs with LALAH HATHAWAY and ERIC BENET Oct. 28 at the Times-Union Center’s Moran Theater, Downtown.

LIVE + LOCAL MUSIC CONCERTS THIS WEEK

Prefest Invasion 3: I CAME FROM EARTH, $2 CHEECH, KID YOU NOT, POTATO ROCKET, DAN WEBB & THE SPIDERS, IRISH HANDCUFFS, THE CAULFIELD CULT 5:30 p.m. Oct. 26, Planet Sarbez, 115 Anastasia Blvd., St. Augustine, 342-0632, $10; $15 two-venue pass.

SPADE McQUADE 6 p.m. Oct. 26, Fionn MacCool’s Irish Pub, Jacksonville Landing, Ste. 176, 374-1247.

CRYPTIC WISDOM, THE PALMER SQUARES, MATTHEW CARTER, BLUFF GAWD, DENVER HALL, GPO 7 p.m. Oct. 26, Jack Rabbits, 1528 Hendricks Ave., San Marco, 398-7496, $12 advance; $15 day of.

SQUIRREL NUT ZIPPERS 7:30 p.m. Oct. 26, Ritz Theatre & Museum, 829 N. Davis St., Downtown, 632-5555, $30-$35.

THE AUDACITY, ELECTRIC WATER, GOV CLUB, THE STEVEN MARSHEK GROUP, DJ J MIX 8 p.m. Oct. 26, Nighthawks, 2952 Roosevelt Blvd., Riverside.

MEAN JEANS, MELTED, WET NURSE, TEENAGE LOBOTOMY 8 p.m. Oct. 26, Shanghai Nobby’s, 10 Anastasia Blvd., St. Augustine, 547-2188.

Prefest Invasion 3: BLACK DRUM, MENTAL BOY, BOBBY’S OAR, SECRET STUFF, HODERA, NO FUN, NATO COLES & THE BLUE DIAMOND BAND, THE SCUTCHES, THE RAGING NATHANS, WONK UNIT 5 p.m. Oct. 27, Shanghai Nobby’s $10; $15 two-venue pass.

JON LANGSTON, RAY FULCHER 6 p.m. Oct. 27, Mavericks Live, 2 Independent Dr., Downtown, 356-1110, $25-$30.

Prefest Invasion 3: CERAMICATS, FAULTS, SLEEPTALKER, LA PECHE, ROBES, TWELVE HOUR TURN, DREDGER 6 p.m. Oct. 27, Planet Sarbez, $10; $15 two-venue pass.

ERNIE EVANS 7:30 p.m. Oct. 27, Mudville Music Room, 3104 Atlantic Blvd., St. Nicholas, 352-7008, $10.

GHOSTWITCH, URSULA, The NOCTAMBULANT 8 p.m. Oct. 27, Jack Rabbits, $8 advance; $10 day of.

DJ ZANE 3 8 p.m. Oct. 27, Nighthawks.

“3” the BAND 9 p.m. Oct. 27, Flying Iguana, 207 Atlantic Blvd., Neptune Beach, 853-5680.

Suwannee Hulaween: THE STRING CHEESE INCIDENT, MY MORNING JACKET, DISCLOSURE, LOGIC, UMPHREY’S McGEE, GREENSKY BLUEGRASS, LETTUCE and dozens more jam-happy groups Oct. 28, 29 & 30, Spirit of the Suwannee Music Park, 3076 95th Dr., Live Oak, 386-3641683, $69-$279; details and tix at musicliveshere.com.

Adult BYOB Cruise: JIM BARCARO 5:30 p.m. Oct. 28 & 29, 1 N. Front St., Fernandina Beach, 261-9972, ameliariver cruises.com.

THE AVETT BROTHERS 7:30 p.m. Oct. 28, Veterans Memorial Arena, 300 A. Philip Randolph Blvd., Downtown, 630-3900, $34-$54.

MIKE SHACKELFORD, STEVE SHANHOLTZER, JOEY KERR, STEVE CAREY 7:30 p.m. Oct. 28, Mudville Music Room, $10.

ANTHONY HAMILTON, LALAH HATHAWAY ERIC BENET 8 p.m. Oct. 28, Times-Union Center’s Moran Theater, 300 Water St., Downtown, 633-6110, $48.50-$88.50.

TWELVE HOUR TURN, BIRTHDAY PONY, RØBES, LA PECHE, SLEEP TALKER, MOYAMOYA 8 p.m. Oct. 28, Rain Dogs, 1045 Park St., Riverside, 379-4969, $10.

THE MINNEAPOLIS SOUND (Prince Tribute) 8 p.m. Oct. 28, Ponte Vedra Concert Hall, 1050 A1A N., 209-0399, $27.

SMELLS LIKE GRUNGE (Nirvana Tribute), ELITE (Deftones Tribute) 8 p.m. Oct. 28, 1904 Music Hall, 19 Ocean St., Downtown, $8 advance; $10 day of.

PAUL IVEY BAND 8 p.m. Oct. 28, Unity Plaza Amphitheater, 220 Riverside Ave., 220-5830.

JUST THE TIPS 8 p.m. Oct. 28, Nighthawks.

MONKEY WRENCH 9:30 p.m. Oct. 28, Whiskey Jax, 10915 Baymeadows Rd., Southside, 634-7208.

BRITESIDE 10 p.m. Oct. 28 & 29, Flying Iguana.

RAZORZ EDGE, CID VOORHEEZ, MIZZY RAW, AUTOMATIK FIT 7 p.m. Oct. 29, Jack Rabbits, $8 advance; $10 day of.

BONNIE RAITT, The CALIFORNIA HONEYDROPS 7:30 p.m. Oct. 29, St. Augustine Amphitheatre, 1340 A1A S., 209-0367, $39.50-$99.50.

TODD SNIDER, ROREY CARROLL 8 p.m. Oct. 29, Ponte Vedra Concert Hall, $36.50-$41.50.

GOLDEN PELICANS, TENEMENT, DFMK, THE MOLD 8 p.m. Oct. 29, Shanghai Nobby’s MEAN JEANS, MELTED, DAGGER BEACH, DEEP THOUGHTS 8 p.m. Oct. 29, Nighthawks.

DEPARTMENT of CORRECTION, DIE CHOKING, SHADOW HUNTER, LA-A, TOILER 8 p.m. Oct. 29, Rain Dogs.

MICHAEL LAGASSE 6 p.m. Oct. 30, Limelight Theatre, 11 Old Mission Ave., St. Augustine, 825-1164, $5.

THE ELI YOUNG BAND 6 p.m. Oct. 30, Mavericks Live, $20-$25.

DARREN CORLEW 8:30 p.m. Oct. 30, Flying Iguana.

FAREWELL MY LOVE, THE FUNERAL PORTRAIT, MATT SKAJEM 7 p.m. Nov. 1, Jack Rabbits, $10.

JON STICKLEY TRIO, LEISURE CHIEF, AFROBETA 8 p.m.

Nov. 2, 1904 Music Hall.

NARROW/ARROW, CAVE PAINT, SEA CYCLES, LANNDS 9 p.m. Nov. 2, Nighthawks.

UPCOMING CONCERTS

CASTING CROWNS, MATT MAHER, HANNAH KERR Nov. 3, Veterans Memorial Arena SURFER BLOOD, THE BEST of SYNTHIA Nov. 3, The Original Café Eleven WHETHERMAN Nov. 3, Mudville Music Room LORD ALMIGHTY, MO’YNOQ, QUEEF HUFFER, SATURNINE Nov. 3, Shantytown Pub MAC SABBATH, COUGHIN Nov. 3, Jack Rabbits NF, FLEURIE Nov. 3, Ponte Vedra Concert Hall LO CASH Nov. 3, Mavericks Live GHOST, POPESTAR Nov. 4, The Florida Theatre INSEL (ROBIN RÜTENBERG) Nov. 4, Crisp-Ellert Art Museum, Flagler College RAMONA QUIMBY, JIM JOHNSTON’S TRIO OF BOOM, JON BAILEY Nov. 4, St. Augustine Amphitheatre Backyard Party RADOSLAV LORKOVIK, ANDREW HARDIN Nov. 4, Mudville Music Room BLAIR CRIMMINS & THE HOOKERS Nov. 5, Café Eleven ZZ TOP Nov. 5, St. Augustine Amphitheatre THE RED JUMPSUIT APPARATUS, CASSIDY LEE, IVAN PULLEY Nov. 6, Jack Rabbits

DARYL HALL & JOHN OATES, TROMBONE SHORTY & ORLEANS AVENUE Nov. 9, St. Augustine Amphitheatre DOOMSTRESS, LA-A Nov. 9, Shantytown Pub TOOTS & the MAYTALS Nov. 9, Mavericks Live RUSHMOREFL, KID YOU NOT Nov. 9, Shanghai Nobby’s EVANESCENCE, SICK PUPPIES Nov. 10, St. Augustine Amphitheatre THE DOOBIE BROTHERS, THE FABULOUS THUNDERBIRDS Nov. 11, St. Augustine Amphitheatre BLEAK, MINDFIELD, CONSEQUENCE Nov. 11, Rain Dogs ODD SQUAD LIVE! Nov. 12, The Florida Theatre ANIMAL COLLECTIVE Nov. 12, Mavericks Live CHRIS YOUNG, DUSTIN LYNCH, CASSADEE POPE Nov. 12, St. Augustine Amphitheatre Lincolnville Porch Fest: CHELSEA SADDLER, TELEPATHIC LINES, RIVERNECKS, THE WOBBLY TOMS, GHOST TROPIC, AMY HENDRICKSON, SAND FLEAS, ROBBIE DAMMIT & THE BROKEN STRINGS, NESTA, RAMONA QUIMBY, KYLE WAGONER, EARLY DISCLAIMERS, LONESOME BERT & THE SKINNY LIZARDS, KENSLEY STEWART, THE WILLOWWACKS, ASLYN & THE NAYSAYERS Nov. 12, St. Augustine TRACY MORGAN Nov. 12, Thrasher-Horne Center LEE GREENWOOD Nov. 13, St. Augustine Amphitheatre WAR Nov. 13, Ponte Vedra Concert Hall MITSKI Nov. 13, Jack Rabbits THIEVERY CORPORATION, TAUK Nov. 15, Mavericks Live ERIC JOHNSON Nov. 16, Ponte Vedra Concert Hall ETANA Nov. 16, Mavericks Live DAVISSON BROTHERS BAND Nov. 17, Café Eleven GALACTIC, THE HIP ABDUCTION Nov. 17, Ponte Vedra Concert Hall BOB DYLAN & HIS BAND Nov. 18, Times-Union Center SAVION GLOVER Nov. 18, The Florida Theatre YELLOWCARD, DRYJACKET Nov. 18, Mavericks Live WVRM Fest 4: YOUNG AND IN THE WAY, CULTURE KILLER, SHROUD EATER, HEXXUS, SPACE CADAVER, 25 more Nov. 18 & 19, 1904 Music Hall Swamp Radio: KATHERINE ARCHER, DUFFY BISHOP, UNNAMED TRIO Nov. 19, St. Augustine Amphitheatre WONDER YEARS, REAL FRIENDS Nov. 19, Mavericks Live NELLIE McCAY Nov. 19, Ponte Vedra Concert Hall ENTER THE HAGGIS Nov. 20, Café Eleven MANNHEIM STEAMROLLER Nov. 21, Times-Union Center for the Performing Arts AN EVENING WITH DAVID CROSBY Nov. 21, Ponte Vedra Concert Hall STEVE VAI Nov. 23, The Florida Theatre FANTASIA, GUORDAN BANKS, LA’PORSHA RENAE Nov. 25, Times-Union Center for the Performing Arts AARON TILL Nov. 26, Mudville Music Room OWEL, THE SOIL & THE SUN Nov. 27, 1904 Music Hall KENNY G Nov. 28, The Florida Theatre QUEENSRYCHE, ARMORED SAINT Nov. 29, Mavericks Live DREAM THEATER Nov. 29, The Florida Theatre JIMMY VAUGHAN Nov. 30, Ponte Vedra Concert Hall PERPETUAL GROOVE Nov. 30, Mavericks Live CALIFORNIA GUITAR TRIO Dec. 1, Ponte Vedra Concert Hall BOYZ TO MEN Dec. 1, Thrasher-Horne Center

OCTOBER 26 - NOVEMBER 1, 2016 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | 27

LIVE + LOCAL MUSIC Blues great BONNIE RAITT (pictured) performs with THE CALIFORNIA HONEYDROPS Oct. 29 at St. Augustine Amphitheatre.

PATRICK BARTLEY Dec. 1, Ritz Theatre DAVE KOZ & FRIENDS CHRISTMAS, VALERIE SIMPSON, KENNY LATIMORE, JONATHAN BUTLER Dec. 1, The Florida Theatre Winter Formal: THE 1975, PHANTOGRAM, SILVERSUN PICKUPS, GLASS ANIMALS, COIN Dec. 2, St. Augustine Amphitheatre THE STANLEY CLARKE BAND Dec. 2, Ponte Vedra Concert Hall SARA EVANS Dec. 2, The Florida Theatre SAM PACETTI Dec. 2, Mudville Music Room TONY JOE WHITE, MERE WOODARD Dec. 3, Ponte Vedra Concert Hall ROCK ’N’ ROLL HOLIDAY SHOW Dec. 3, Florida Theatre TRAVIS TRITT Dec. 4, The Florida Theatre

NIYKEE HEATON Dec. 4, Mavericks Live TAYLOR HICKS Dec. 7, Ponte Vedra Concert Hall PIERCE PETTIS Dec. 8, Mudville Music Room Elio’s Quartet: ELIO PIEDRA, LIVAN MESA, YUNIOR ARRONTE, YORGIS GOIRICELAYA Dec. 10, Ritz Theatre CHRIS LANE Dec. 10, Mavericks Live A Peter White Christmas: RICK BRAUN, EUGE GROOVE Dec. 11, The Florida Theatre THE OAK RIDGE BOYS Dec. 13, The Florida Theatre EDWIN McCAIN Dec. 14, Ponte Vedra Concert Hall TRANS-SIBERIAN ORCHESTRA Dec. 15, Veterans Memorial Arena GRIFFIN HOUSE Dec. 18, Café Eleven JACKIE EVANCHO Dec. 21, The Florida Theatre DONNA THE BUFFALO, BUTCH TRUCKS & THE FREIGHT

TRAIN BAND Dec. 29, Ponte Vedra Concert Hall SHEN YUN 2017Jan. 3 & 4, Times-Union Center MICHAEL BOLTON Jan. 11, The Florida Theatre DAMIEN ESCOBAR Jan. 12, Ponte Vedra Concert Hall WIMPY RUTHERFORD & THE CRYPTICS Jan. 13, Nobby’s HENRY ROLLINS Jan. 14, Ponte Vedra Concert Hall LOS LOBOS Jan. 15, Ponte Vedra Concert Hall PINK MARTINI Jan. 17, The Florida Theatre JEANNE ROBERTSON Jan. 21, The Florida Theatre ELVIS LIVES Jan. 24, Times-Union Center GLADYS KNIGHT Jan. 25, The Florida Theatre KATHLEEN MADIGAN Jan. 27, The Florida Theatre J BOOG, JEMERE MORGAN Jan. 27, Ponte Vedra Concert Hall LEON RUSSELL Jan. 28, Ponte Vedra Concert Hall KENNY ROGERS, LINDA DAVIS Jan. 28, Thrasher-Horne Center for the Performing Arts THE BEACH BOYS Jan. 28, The Florida Theatre VOCALOSITY Feb. 1, The Florida Theatre CHRISTIE DASHIELL Feb. 2, Ritz Theatre ARLO GUTHRIE Feb. 2, The Florida Theatre TOM RUSH Feb. 3, Ponte Vedra Concert Hall PAT METHENY, ANTONIO SANCHEZ, LINDA OH, GWILYM SIMCOCK Feb. 3, The Florida Theatre SARA WATKINS Feb. 4, Ponte Vedra Concert Hall BOSTON POPS ESPLANDE ORCHESTRA Feb. 4, TimesUnion Center for the Performing Arts GAELIC STORM Feb. 8, Ponte Vedra Concert Hall TAJ MAHAL Feb. 10, Ponte Vedra Concert Hall The BABES Feb. 11, Ponte Vedra Concert Hall UNDER THE STREETLAMP Feb. 12, Ponte Vedra Concert Hall ANDY McKEE Feb. 15, Ponte Vedra Concert Hall THREE DOG NIGHT, AMERICA Feb. 16, Florida Theatre THE PAUL THORN BAND Feb. 17, Ponte Vedra Concert Hall THE PIANO GUYS Feb. 17, The Florida Theatre TOBYMAC, MATT MAHER, MANDISA, MAC POWELL, CAPITAL KINGS, RYAN STEVENSON, HOLLYN Feb. 17, Veterans Memorial Arena TRAE CROWDER, COREY RYAN FORESTER, DREW MORGAN Feb. 18, Ponte Vedra Concert Hall SOUTHSIDE JOHNNY & THE ASBURY JUKES Feb. 19, The Florida Theatre COLIN HAY Feb. 22, Ponte Vedra Concert Hall JOE BONAMASSA Feb. 22, The Florida Theatre MINDI ABAIR Feb. 23, Ritz Theatre MANHATTAN TRANSFER, TAKE 6 Feb. 23, Florida Theatre FOREIGNER, KANSAS Feb. 24, St. Augustine Amphitheatre ELIZABETH COOK, DALE WATSON Feb. 24, Ponte Vedra Concert Hall OLD 97’s, BOTTLE ROCKETS Feb. 25, Ponte Vedra Concert Hall DENNIS DeYOUNG, Jacksonville Rock Symphony Orchestra Feb. 26, The Florida Theatre AGENT ORANGE, GUTTERMOUTH, THE QUEERS, THE ATOM AGE Feb. 26, St. Augustine Amphitheatre Backyard Party TAJ EXPRESS Feb. 28, Times-Union Center MARC COHN March 1, Ponte Vedra Concert Hall THE WEIGHT, members of The Band March 3, Ponte Vedra Concert Hall LUCINDA WILLIAMS March 4, Ponte Vedra Concert Hall SPYRO GYRA March 5, The Florida Theatre KODO March 11, The Florida Theatre CLINT BLACK March 12, Florida Theatre THE CHARLIE DANIELS BAND March 16, Florida Theatre GET THE LED OUT March 17, The Florida Theatre PILOBOLUS SHADOWLAND March 21, Florida Theatre I Love The ’90s Tour: VANILLA ICE, NAUGHTY by NATURE, SUGAR RAY’S MARK McGRATH, BIZ MARKIE, ALL-4-ONE, CHEYENNE JACKSON March 24, Ponte Vedra Concert Hall YOUNG MC March 24, St. Augustine Amphitheatre 1964: The TRIBUTE March 25, St. Augustine Amphitheatre AIR SUPPLY March 26, The Florida Theatre JIM BRICKMAN March 31, The Florida Theatre RICK THOMAS April 1, Ponte Vedra Concert Hall ANA POPOVIC April 5, Ponte Vedra Concert Hall LITTLE RIVER BAND, Jacksonville Rock Symphony Orchestra April 7, The Florida Theatre ANDRAE MURCHINSON April 8, Ritz Theatre BUDDY GUY, THE RIDES (Stephen Stills, Kenny Wayne Shepherd, Barry Goldberg) April 9, St. Augustine Amphitheatre CHRIS BOTTI April 18, The Florida Theatre MJ LIVE! April 20-23, Times-Union Center TOWER OF POWER April 22, The Florida Theatre ERIC CHURCH May 5, Veterans Memorial Arena BASTILLE May 7, St. Augustine Amphitheatre TIM McGRAW & FAITH HILL Sept. 16, Veterans Memorial Arena DELFEAYO MARSALIS Sept. 29, Riverside Fine Arts Series

LIVE MUSIC CLUBS

AMELIA ISLAND, FERNANDINA

ALLEY CAT BEER HOUSE, 316 Centre St., 491-1001 Dan Voll 6:30 p.m. Oct. 26. John Springer every Thur. Brian Ernst every Fri. LA MANCHA, 2709 Sadler Rd., 261-4646 Miguel Paley 5:30-9 p.m. every Fri.-Sun. Javier Parez every Sun. SLIDERS SEASIDE GRILL, 1998 S. Fletcher Ave., 2776652 King Eddie & Pili Pili 6 p.m. Oct. 26. Tad Jennings Oct. 27. Darrel Rae, Reggae SWAT Team Oct. 28. JC & Mike, Davis Turner Oct. 29. JC & Mike Oct. 30. Dan Voll Oct. 31.

Mark O’Quinn Nov. 1 SURF RESTAURANT, 3199 S. Fletcher Ave., 261-5711 Yancy Clegg Oct. 26. Reggie Catfish Lee Oct. 27. Black Jack Band every Fri.

28 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | OCTOBER 26 - NOVEMBER 1, 2016

LIVE + LOCAL MUSIC Local faves BRITESIDE perform Oct. 28 & 29 at Flying Iguana, Neptune Beach.

AVONDALE, ORTEGA

CASBAH CAFÉ, 3628 St. Johns Ave., 981-9966 Goliath Flores every Wed. Live jazz every Sun. Live music 9 p.m. every Mon. ECLIPSE, 4219 St. Johns Ave. KJ Free 9 p.m. every Tue. & Thur. Indie dance 9 p.m. every Wed. ’80s & ’90s dance every Fri. MELLOW MUSHROOM, 3611 St. Johns Ave., 388-0200 Live music every Thur.-Sat.

THE BEACHES

(All venues in Jax Beach unless otherwise noted)

BLUE TYPHOON, 2309 Beach Blvd., 379-3789 Live music most weekends BLUE WATER ISLAND GRILL, 205 First St. N., 249-0083 Mystic Dino, Ras AJ Oct. 30 BRASS ANCHOR PUB, 2292 Mayport Rd., Atlantic Beach, 249-0301 Dan “Shifty Gears” Raymond, Joe Oliff Oct. 26 FLYING IGUANA, 207 Atlantic Blvd., Neptune Beach, 853-5680 3 the Band 9 p.m. Oct. 27. Briteside 10 p.m.

Oct. 28 & 29. Darren Corlew 8:30 p.m. Oct. 30. Live music every weekend GUSTO, 1266 Beach Blvd., 372-9925 Groov 7:30 p.m. every Wed. Murray Goff every Fri. Under the Bus every Sat. Gene Nordan 6 p.m. every Sun. LYNCH’S IRISH PUB, 514 First St. N., 249-5181 Yamadeo 10 p.m. Oct. 28. Let’s Ride 10 p.m. Oct. 29. Split Tone every Thur. Chillula every Fri. Be Easy every Mon. MELLOW MUSHROOM, 1018 Third St. N., 241-5600 Bonnie Blue 9 p.m. Nov. 3. Live music every weekend MEZZA RESTAURANT & BAR, 110 First St., Neptune Beach, 249-5573 Gypsies Ginger every Wed. Mike Shackelford, Steve Shanholtzer every Thur. Mezza Shuffle every Mon. Trevor Tanner every Tue. RAGTIME TAVERN, 207 Atlantic Blvd., Atlantic Beach, 241-7877 Cody Johnston Oct. 26. The Christopher Dean Band, Dave Hollingsworth 7 p.m. Oct. 27. Bay Street Oct. 28 & 29. Live music every Wed.-Sun. SALT LIFE FOOD SHACK, 1018 N. Third St., 372-4456 Billy Buchanan Oct. 30 SOUTHERN GROUNDS & Co., 200 First St., Neptune Beach, 249-2922 The Session 7 p.m. Oct. 28 ZETA BREWING, 131 First Ave. N., 372-0727 Live music every Thur.-Sat.

CAMDEN COUNTY, GA.

CAPTAIN STAN’S SMOKEHOUSE, 700 Bedell Dr., Woodbine, 912-729-9552 Acoustic music 6:30 p.m. every Sat.

DOWNTOWN

1904 MUSIC HALL, 19 Ocean St. N. Oceana 7 p.m. Oct. 26. Smells Like Grunge (Nirvana Tribute), Elite (Deftones Tribute) 8 p.m. Oct. 28. The Boogie, Denzel Curry, Yoshi Thompkins Nov. 1. Jon Stickley Trio, Leisure Chief, Afrobeta 8 p.m. Nov. 2 DE REAL TING, 128 W. Adams St., 633-9738 De Lions of Jah 7 p.m. Oct. 28 DOS GATOS, 123 E. Forsyth St., 354-0666 DJ Brandon every Thur. DJ NickFresh every Sat. DJ Randall every Mon. DJ Hollywood every Tue. FIONN MacCOOL’S, Jax Landing, 374-1247 Spade McQuade 6 p.m. Oct. 26. Dirty Gringos 8 p.m.-2 a.m. Oct. 28. Austin Park 8 p.m.-2 a.m. Oct. 29. Live music every Fri. & Sat. JACKSONVILLE LANDING, 353-1188 DJ Kevin Tos, DJ Patrick Harlow 7 p.m.-2 a.m., Austin Park 8 p.m.-1 a.m.

Oct. 28. Radio Love 11:00 a.m.-3:30 p.m., DJ Kevin Tos, DJ Davin Hydro 7 p.m.-2 a.m., Easy Posse 8 p.m.-1 a.m.

Oct. 29 MARK’S DOWNTOWN, 315 E. Bay St., 355-5099 DJ Dr. Doom 10 p.m. every Fri. DJ Shotgun 10 p.m. every Sat. MAVERICKS LIVE, Jax Landing, 356-1110 Jon Langston, Ray Fulcher 6 p.m. Oct. 27. Georgia Florida Dance Party 7 p.m. Oct. 28. Georgia vs. Florida Watch and After Partynoon Oct. 29. Eli Young Band 6 p.m. Oct. 30.

Johnnyswim Nov. 2. Joe Buck, DJ Justin every Thur.-Sat. MYTH NIGHTCLUB, 333 E. Bay St., 707-0474 DJs Lady Miaou, Booty Boo, Cry Havoc, Some Dude 9 p.m. Glitz Wed. Q45, live music Wed. EDM every Thur. Eric Rush every Fri. DJ IBay Sat. Bangarang & Crunchay Sun. THE VOLSTEAD, 115 W. Adams St., 414-3171 Go Get Gone 9 p.m. Oct. 28

FLEMING ISLAND

MELLOW MUSHROOM, 1800 Town Ctr. Blvd., 541-1999 Robert Brown Jr. The Confluent 8 p.m. Oct. 28. Live music most weekends WHITEY’S FISH CAMP, 2032 C.R. 220, 269-4198 Love Monkey 9 p.m. Oct. 28. Live music every Thur.-Sun.

INTRACOASTAL

CLIFF’S BAR & GRILL, 3033 Monument Rd., Ste. 2, 645-5162 Vox Debut Oct. 26. Blistur 10 p.m. Oct. 28 & 29.

Open mic every Tue.

JERRY’S, 13170 Atlantic Blvd., 220-6766 Rick Arcusa 10 p.m. Oct. 28

MANDARIN

ENZA’S ITALIAN RESTAURANT, 10601 San Jose Blvd., Ste. 109, 268-4458 Brian Iannucci Oct. 26 & 30 IGGY’S SEAFOOD SHACK, 104 Bartram Oaks Walk, Ste. 101, 209-5209 Brittney Lawrence 6 p.m. Oct. 27. DJ Greg every Wed.

ORANGE PARK, MIDDLEBURG

DEE’S MUSIC BAR, 2141 Loch Rane Blvd., Ste. 140, 375-2240 DJ Daddy-O every Tue. THE HILLTOP, 2030 Wells Rd., 272-5959 John Michael on the piano every Tue.-Sat. THE ROADHOUSE, 231 Blanding Blvd., 264-0611 The Anton LaPlume Band 10 p.m. Oct. 26. DJ Big Mike Oct. 27.

Flag on Fire 8 p.m. Oct. 28. Live music every weekend SHARK CLUB, 714 Park Ave., 215-1557 Digital Skyline Oct. 26

PONTE VEDRA BEACH

PUSSER’S GRILLE, 816 A1A, 280-7766 Live music weekend TABLE 1, 330 A1A, 280-5515 Deron Baker Oct. 26 & Nov. 1. Gary Starling Jazz Band Oct. 27. Tier 2 7:30 p.m. Oct. 28. Javier Naranjo Oct. 29

RIVERSIDE, WESTSIDE

BRIXX, 220 Riverside Ave., 300-3928 Live music Thur. & Fri. HOBNOB, 220 Riverside Ave., Ste. 10, 513-4272 Live music every Fri. LIMES LIVE, 11265 S. Lane Ave., 444-2709 Hawthorne Heights, Convictions, In Her Own Words 7 p.m. Oct. 13 MURRAY HILL THEATRE, 932 Edgewood Ave., 388-7807 Freddy Rosario 7 p.m. Nov. 5 NIGHTHAWKS, 2952 Roosevelt Blvd. The Audacity, Electric Water, Gov Club, The Steven Marshek Group, DJ J Mix 8 p.m. Oct. 26. DJ Zane 3 8 p.m. Oct. 27. Just the Tips 8 p.m. Oct. 28. Mean Jeans, Melted, Dagger Beach, Deep Thoughts 8 p.m. Oct. 29. Narrow/Arrow, Cave Paint, Sea Cycles, Lannds 9 p.m. Nov. 29 RAIN DOGS, 1045 Park St., 379-4969 Twelve Hour Turn, Birthday Pony, Røbes, La Peche, Sleep Talker, Moyamoya 8 p.m. Oct. 28. Department of Correction, Die Choking, Shadow Hunter, LA-A, Toiler 8 p.m. Oct. 29. Matt Woods, Beay Crum Nov. 1 UNITY PLAZA, 220 Riverside Ave. Paul Ivey 8 p.m. Oct. 28. Live music most every weekend

ST. AUGUSTINE

CELLAR UPSTAIRS, 157 King St., 826-1594 Brady Reich, Oh No Oct. 28. Evan D, Beautiful Bobby Blackmon & the B3 Blues Band Oct. 29. Vinny Jacobs Oct. 30 MARDI GRAS, 123 San Marco Ave., 823-8806 Twisted Vibes Oct. 28. JW Gilmore Oct. 29. Fre Gordon open mic Oct. 30. DJ Rob St. John every Wed.

THE ORIGINAL CAFE ELEVEN, 501 A1A Beach Blvd., St. Augustine Beach, 460-9311 Surfer Blood, The Best of Synthia 8:30 p.m. Nov. 3 PLANET SARBEZ, 115 Anastasia Blvd., 342-0632 Prefest Invasion 3: I Came From Earth, $2 Cheech, Kid You Not, Potato Rocket, Dan Webb & The Spiders, Irish Handcuffs, The Caulfield Cult 5:30 p.m. Oct. 26. Prefest Invasion 3: Ceramicats, Faults, Sleeptalker, La Peche, Robes, Twelve Hour Turn, Dredger 6 p.m. Oct. 27 SHANGHAI NOBBY’S, 10 Anastasia Blvd., 547-2188 Mean Jeans, Melted, Wet Nurse, Teenage Lobotomy 8 p.m. Oct. 26. Prefest Invasion 3: Black Drum, Mental Boy, Bobby’s Oar, Secret Stuff, Hodera, No Fun, Nato Coles & The Blue Diamond Band, The Scutches, The Raging Nathans, Wonk Unit 5 p.m. Oct. 27. Golden Pelicans, Tenement, DFMK, The Mold 8 p.m. Oct. 29. Halloween Party Oct. 31 TRADEWINDS LOUNGE, 124 Charlotte St., 829-9336 Cottonmouth 9 p.m. Oct. 28 & 29. Live music every night

SAN MARCO

JACK RABBITS, 1528 Hendricks Ave., 398-7496 Cryptic Wisdom, The Palmer Squares, Matthew Carter, Bluff Gawd, Denver Hall, GPO 7 p.m. Oct. 26. Ghostwitch, Ursula, The Noctambulant 8 p.m. Oct. 27. Razorz Edge, Cid Voorheez, Mizzy Raw, Automatik Fit 7 p.m. Oct. 29. Farewell My Love, The Funeral Portrait, Matt Skajem 7 p.m. Nov. 1 MUDVILLE Music Room, 3104 Atlantic Blvd., 352-7008 Ernie Evans 7:30 p.m. Oct. 27. Mike Shackelford, Steve Shanholtzer, Joey Kerr, Steve Carey 7:30 p.m. Oct. 28

SOUTHSIDE, BAYMEADOWS

GREEK STREET CAFÉ, 3546 St. Johns Bluff Rd. S., 503-0620 Tavernalive 6 p.m. every Mon. MELLOW MUSHROOM, 9734 Deer Lake Ct., 997-1955 IRIEsistance Oct. 27. Anton LaPlume Band Oct. 28.

Milltown Road Oct. 29 WHISKEY JAX, 10915 Baymeadows Rd., 634-7208 Murray Goff, Shayne Rammler Oct. 26. Monkey Wrench 9:30 p.m. Oct. 28. Melissa Smith open mic every Thur.

Blues jam every Sun. Country jam every Wed.

SPRINGFIELD, NORTHSIDE

The BIRDHOUSE, 1827 N. Pearl St., 634-7523 Live music most weekends The HEADLAMP, 818 Clay St. Live music every Fri. & Sat. MELLOW MUSHROOM Pizza Bakers, 15170 Max Leggett Pkwy., 757-8843 Live music most every weekend SANDOLLAR, 9716 Heckscher Dr., 251-2449 Live music every Fri.-Sun. SHANTYTOWN PUB, 22 W. Sixth St., 798-8222 Autopilot 10 p.m. Oct. 26

__________________________________ To list your band’s gig, please send time, date, location (street address, city), admission price, and a contact number to print to Daniel A. Brown, email dbrown@ folioweekly.com or by the U.S. Postal Service, 45 W. Bay St., Ste. 103, Jacksonville FL 32202. Events run on a space-available basis. Deadline is at noon every Wednesday for the next Wednesday’s publication.

OCTOBER 26 - NOVEMBER 1, 2016 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | 29

FOLIO DINING

Southside's venerable Indian restaurant, India's is located at the corner of Baymeadows and Southside photo by Dennis Ho

AMELIA ISLAND FERNANDINA BEACH

29 SOUTH EATS, 29 S. Third St., 277-7919, 29southrestaur ant.com. Historic downtown bistro’s Chef Scotty Schwartz serves traditional regional cuisine with a modern twist. $$ L Tu-Sa; D M.-Sa; R Sa BEACH DINER, 2006 S. Eighth St., 310-3750, beachdiner. com. Innovative breakfast: Eggs on the Bayou, fish-n-grits; French toast, riders, omelets. Lunch fare: salads, burgers, sandwiches, shrimp & crabmeat salad. $ K TO B R L Da ily BRETT’S Waterway Café, 1 S. Front St., 261-2660. F On the water at Centre Street’s end, it’s Southern hospitality in an upscale atmosphere; daily specials, fresh local seafood, aged beef. $$$ FB L D Daily CAFÉ KARIBO, 27 N. Third St., 277-5269, cafekaribo.com. F In historic building, family-owned café has worldly fare, madefrom-scratch dressings, sauces, desserts, sourcing fresh greens, veggies, seafood. Dine inside or al fresco under oak-shaded patio. Microbrew Karibrew Pub next door has beer brewed onsite, imports. $$ FB K TO R, Su; L Daily, D Tu-Su in season CHEZ LEZAN Bakery Co., 1014 Atlantic Ave., 491-4663, chez lezanbakery.com. Fresh European-style breads, pastries: croissants, muffins, cakes, pies. $ TO B R L Daily The CRAB TRAP, 31 N. Second St., 261-4749, ameliacrabtrap .com. F Nearly 40 years, family-owned-and-operated. Fresh local seafood, steaks, specials. HH. $$ FB L D Daily DAVID’S Restaurant & Lounge, 802 Ash St., 310-6049, amelia islanddavids.com. Steaks, fresh seafood, rack of lamb and ribeye, Chilean sea bass, in an upscale atmosphere. Chef Wesley Cox has a new lounge menu. $$$$ FB D Nightly DICK’S Wings & Grill, 474313 E. S.R. 200, 310-6945. 2016 Best of Jax Winner. SEE ORANGE PARK.

JACK & DIANE’S, 708 Centre St., 321-1444, jackanddianes cafe.com. F Renovated 1887 shotgun house. Faves: jambalaya, French toast, pancakes, mac & cheese, crêpes. Vegan items.

Inside or porch overlooking historic area. $$ BW K TO B L D Daily La MANCHA, 2709 Sadler Rd., 261-4646. Spanish, Portuguese fare, Brazilian flair. Tapas, seafood, steaks, sangria. Drink specials. AYCE paella Sun. $$$ FB K TO D Nightly LARRY’S Subs, 474272 S.R. 200, 844-2225. F SEE ORANGE PARK. LECHONERA EL COQUÍ, 232 N. Second St., 432-7545. New Puerto Rican place. Chulleta kan kan (pork chops), Tripletta churosco sandwich, more. $ FB TO L D Tu-Su MOON RIVER Pizza, 925 S. 14th St., 321-3400, moonriver pizza.net. F 2016 Best of Jax Winner. Authentic Northernstyle pizzas, 20+ toppings, pie/slice. Calzones, salads. $ BW TO L D M-Sa The MUSTARD SEED Café, 833 Courson Rd., 277-3141, nassaushealthfoods.net. Casual organic eatery, juice bar, in Nassau Health Foods. All-natural organic items, smoothies, juices, herbal teas, coffees, daily specials. $$ K TO B L M-Sa The PATIO PLACE, 416 Ash St., 410-3717, patioplacebistro. com. Bistro/wine bar/crêperie’s menu of global fare uses crêpes: starters, entrées, shareables, desserts. $$ BW TO B L D Tu-Su The PECAN ROLL Bakery, 122 S. Eighth St., 491-9815, thepec anrollbakery.com. F By historic district. Sweet/savory pastries, cookies, cakes, bagels, breads; from scratch. $ K TO B L W-Su POINTE Restaurant, 98 S. Fletcher Ave., 277-4851, elizabeth pointelodge.com. 2016 Best of Jax Winner. In award-winning inn Elizabeth Pointe Lodge. Seaside dining, open to public. Dine in or out. Hot buffet breakfast daily, full lunch menu. Homestyle soups, specialty sandwiches, salads, desserts. $$$ BW K B L D Daily The SALTY PELICAN Bar & Grill, 12 N. Front St., 277-3811, thesaltypelicanamelia.com. F 2016 Best of Jax Winner.

2nd-story outdoor bar. Owners T.J. & Al offer local seafood, fish tacos, Mayport shrimp, po’boys, cheese oysters. $$ FB K L D Daily To list your restaurant, call your account manager or Sam Taylor, 860-2465 • staylor@folioweekly.com

DINING DIRECTORY KEY

AVERAGE ENTRÉE • COST •

$ = Less than $10 $$ = $10- $20 $$$ = $20- $35 $$$$ = $35 & up BW = Beer/Wine FB = Full Bar K = Kids’ Menu TO = Take Out B = Breakfast R = Brunch L = Lunch D = Dinner Bite Club = Hosted free FW Bite Club event. fwbiteclub.com 2015 Best of Jax winner F = FW distribution spot

30 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | OCTOBER 26 - NOVEMBER 1, 2016

SLIDERS Seaside Grill, 1998 S. Fletcher Ave., 277-6652, slidersseaside.com. F 2016 Best of Jax Winner. Oceanfront.

Award-winning handmade crabcakes, fried pickles, fresh seafood.

Open-air 2nd floor, balcony, playground. $$ FB K L D Daily T-RAY’S Burger Station, 202 S. Eighth St., 261-6310. F Family-owned-and-operated 18+ years. Blue plate specials, burgers, biscuits & gravy, shrimp. $ BW TO B L M-Sa

ARLINGTON, REGENCY

DICK’S Wings, 9119 Merrill Rd., Ste. 19, 745-9300. 2016 Best of Jax Winner. SEE ORANGE PARK.

LARRY’S Subs, 1301 Monument Rd., Ste. 5, 724-5802. F SEE ORANGE PARK.

SID & LINDA’S Seafood Market & Restaurant, 12220 Atlantic Blvd., Ste. 109, 503-8276. Pick a whole fresh fish, have it cleaned, filleted, cooked to order. Dine in, take out. Housemade sauces. $$ K TO L D Daily

AVONDALE, ORTEGA

CHOMP CHOMP, 4162 Herschel St., 329-1679. Just relocated.

Chef-inspired: The Philadelphia Experiment (sweet pork over arugula), panko-crusted chicken, burgers, Waldorf salad, bahn mi, Southern fried chicken, The Come Up (portabella mushroom, green tomato salsa, almonds). Curry Chomp chips, pasta salad.

HH. $ BW L D Mon.-Sat. The FOX Restaurant, 3580 St. Johns Ave., 387-2669. Owners Ian and Mary Chase offer fresh fare, homemade desserts.

Breakfast all day; signature items: burgers, meatloaf, fried green tomatoes. $$ BW K L D Daily HARPOON LOUIE’S, 4070 Herschel St., Ste. 8, 389-5631, harpoonlouies.net. F Locally owned & operated 20+ years.

American pub. 1/2-lb. burgers, fish sandwiches, pasta. Local beers, HH. $$ FB K TO L D Daily MELLOW MUSHROOM, 3611 St. Johns Ave., 388-0200. F Bite Club. 2016 Best of Jax Winner. SEE BEACHES.

PINEGROVE Market & Deli, 1511 PineGrove Ave., 389-8655, pinegrovemarket.com. F 2016 Best of Jax Winner. 40+ years.

Burgers, Cubans, subs, wraps. Onsite butcher, USDA choice prime aged beef. Craft beers. Fri. & Sat. fish fry. $ BW TO B L D M-Sa Restaurant ORSAY, 3630 Park St., 381-0909, restaurant orsay.com. 2016 Best of Jax Winner. French/Southern bistro; local organic ingredients. Steak frites, mussels, pork chops. $$$ FB R, Su; D Nightly SIMPLY SARA’S, 2902 Corinthian Ave., 387-1000, simplysara s.net. F Down-home fare from scratch: eggplant fries, pimento cheese, baked chicken, fruit cobblers, chicken & dumplings, desserts. BYOB. $$ K TO L D Tu-Sa, B Sa

BAYMEADOWS

AL’S Pizza, 8060 Philips Hwy., Ste. 105, 731-4300. F 2016 Best of Jax Winner. SEE BEACHES.

INDIA’S Restaurant, 9802 Baymeadows Rd., Ste. 8, 620-0777, indiajax.com. F 2016 Best of Jax Winner. Authentic cuisine, lunch buffet. Curries, vegetables, lamb, chicken, shrimp, fish tandoori. $$ BW L M-Sa; D Nightly LARRY’S Giant Subs, 8616 Baymeadows Rd., 739-2498. F SEE ORANGE PARK.

METRO Diner, 9802 Baymeadows Rd., 425-9142. F 2016 Best of Jax Winner. SEE SAN MARCO.

NATIVE SUN Natural Foods Market & Deli, 11030 Baymeadows Rd., 260-2791. 2016 Best of Jax Winner. SEE MANDARIN. The WELL Watering Hole, 3928 Baymeadows Rd., Ste. 9, 737-7740, thewellwateringhole.com. Local craft beers, glass/ bottle wines. Meatloaf sandwich, pulled Peruvian chicken, vegan black bean burgers. $$ BW K TO L M-F; D Tu-Sa TEQUILAS, 10915 Baymeadows Rd., Ste. 101, 363-1365, tequilasjacksonville.com. New Mexican place has casa-style dishes made with fresh, spicy hot ingredients. Vegetarian option. Top-shelf tequilas, drink specials. $$ FB K TO L D Daily WHISKEY JAX, 10915 Baymeadows Rd., Ste. 135, 634-7208, whiskeyjax.com. Gastropub. Craft beers, gourmet burgers, handhelds, street fare tacos, signature plates, whiskey. HH. $$ FB L D F-Su; D Nightly

BEACHES

(Venues are in Jax Beach unless otherwise noted.)

AL’S PIZZA, 303 Atlantic Blvd., Atlantic Beach, 249-0002, als pizza.com. F 2016 Best of Jax Winner. NY-style gourmet pizzas,

DINING DIRECTORY baked dishes. 28+ years. All day HH M-Thu. $ FB K TO L D Daily ANGIE’S Subs, 1436 Beach Blvd., 246-2519. ANGIE’S Grom Subs, 204 Third Ave. S., 241-3663. Subs made with fresh ingredients, 25+ years. Huge salads, blue-ribbon iced tea.

Grom has Sun. brunch, no alcohol. $ K BW TO L D Daily BEACH Diner, 501 Atlantic Blvd., AB, 249-6500. SEE AMELIA. BEACH HUT Café, 1281 Third St. S., 249-3516. 28+ years.

Full breakfast menu served all day (darn good grits); hot plate specials Mon.-Fri. $ K TO B R L Daily CRUISERS Grill, 319 23rd Ave. S., 270-0356, cruisersgrill. com. 2016 Best of Jax Winner. Locally owned & operated 20+ years. Half-pound burgers, fish sandwiches, big salads, awardwinning cheddar fries, sangria. $ BW K TO L D Daily EUROPEAN Street Café, 992 Beach Blvd., 249-3001, europeanstreet.com. F SEE RIVERSIDE. FAMOUS TOASTERY, 311 N. Third St., 372-0712, famous toastery.com. New place has breakfast and lunch: corned beef hash, gluten-free pancakes, bacon, omelets, eggs, toast. Wraps, Bloody Marys, mimosas, peach Bellini. $$ FB K TO B L Daily The FISH COMPANY Restaurant, 725 Atlantic Blvd., Ste. 12, AB, 246-0123, thefishcojax.com. Bite Club. Casual. Oyster raw bar, fresh local seafood, Mayport shrimp, crab, lobster. Homestyle desserts. Patio; all-day HH Sun. $$ FB K TO L D Daily FLAMING SEAFOOD & SHAO KAO BBQ, 1289 Penman Rd., 853-6398. New place (is it Chinese? Barbecue? Seafood?) serves meats and vegetables, spiced, skewered on bamboo sticks – like Chinese street food. $ BW TO L D Daily FLYING IGUANA Taqueria & Tequila Bar, 207 Atlantic Blvd., NB, 853-5680, flyingiguana.com. F Latin American: tacos, seafood, carnitas, Cubana fare. 100+ tequilas. $ FB TO L D Daily GUSTO, 1266 Beach Blvd., 372-9925, gustojax.com. Classic Old World Roman cuisine, large Italian menu: homestyle pasta, beef, chicken, fish delicacies; open pizza-tossing kitchen.

Reservations encouraged. $$ FB TO L R D Tu-Su The HASH HOUSE, 610 Third St. S., 422-0644, thelovingcup hashhouse.com. New place offers locally sourced fare, locally roasted coffees, gluten-free, vegan, vegetarian dishes – no GMOs or hormones. $ K TO B R L Daily LARRY’S Subs, 657 Third St. N., 247-9620. F SEE ORANGE PARK. MELLOW MUSHROOM Pizza Bakers, 1018 Third St. N., Ste. 2, 241-5600, mellowmushroom.com. F Bite Club. 2016 Best of Jax Winner. Hoagies, gourmet pizzas: Mighty Meaty, vegetarian, Kosmic Karma. 35 tap beers. Nonstop HH. $ FB K TO L D Daily METRO Diner, 1534 3rd St. N., 853-6817. F 2016 Best of Jax Winner. SEE SAN MARCO.

M SHACK, 299 Atlantic Blvd., AB, 241-2599, mshackburgers. com. David and Matthew Medure flip burgers, hot dogs, fries, shakes. Dine in or out. $$ BW L D Daily NATIVE SUN Natural Foods Market & Deli, 1585 Third St. N., 458-1390. 2016 Best of Jax Winner. SEE MANDARIN. POE’S Tavern, 363 Atlantic Blvd., AB, 241-7637, poestavern. com. Gastropub, 50+ beers, burgers, fries, fish tacos, Edgar’s Drunken Chili, daily fish sandwich special. $$ FB K L D Daily RAGTIME Tavern & Seafood Grill, 207 Atlantic Blvd., AB, 241-7877, ragtimetavern.com. F 30+ years, iconic seafood

GRILL ME!

FIONN MacCOOL’S Irish Pub & Restaurant, Jax Landing, Ste. 176, 374-1547, fionnmacs.com. Casual dining, uptown Irish atmosphere; fish & chips, Guinness lamb stew, black-and-tan brownies. $$ FB K L D Daily INDOCHINE, 21 E. Adams St., Ste. 200, 598-5303, indochine jax.com. 2016 Best of Jax Winner. Thai, Southeast Asian cuisine.

Signature dishes: chicken Satay, soft shell crab; mango, sticky rice dessert. $$ FB TO L D M-F; D Tu-Sa OLIO Market, 301 E. Bay St., 356-7100, oliomarket.com. F From-scratch soups, sandwiches. Duck grilled cheese, seen on Best Sandwich in America. $$ BW TO B R L M-F; D F & Sa URBAN GRIND Coffee Company, 45 W. Bay, Ste. 102, 866-3953954, 516-7799, urbangrind.coffee. Locally roasted whole bean brewed coffees, espressos, pastries, smoothies, bagels, cream cheeses. Chicken/tuna salad, sandwiches. WiFi. $ B L M-F. URBAN Grind Express, 50 W. Laura, 516-7799. SEE ABOVE. ZODIAC Bar & Grill, 120 W. Adams St., 354-8283, thezodiac barandgrill.com. 16+ years. Mediterranean cuisine, American fare, paninis, vegetarian dishes. Daily lunch buffet. Espressos, hookahs. HH M-F $ FB L M-F; D W-Sa

FLEMING ISLAND

DICK’S Wings, 1803 East-West Parkway, 375-2559. 2016 Best of Jax Winner. SEE ORANGE PARK.

GRASSROOTS Natural Market, 1915 East-West Parkway, 541-0009. F SEE RIVERSIDE. MELLOW MUSHROOM, 1800 Town Ctr. Blvd., 541-1999. F Bite Club. 2016 Best of Jax Winner. SEE BEACHES.

TAPS Bar & Grill, 1605 C.R. 220, Ste. 145, 278-9421, tapspub lichouse.com. 2016 Best of Jax Winner. 50+ premium domestic, import tap beers. Burgers, sandwiches, entrées. $$ FB K L D Daily WHITEY’S Fish Camp, 2032 C.R. 220, 269-4198, whiteysfish camp.com. F Real fish camp. Gator tail, freshwater catfish, daily specials, on Swimming Pen Creek. Tiki bar. Come by boat, bike or car. $ FB K TO L Tu-Su; D Nightly

INTRACOASTAL WEST

AL’S Pizza, 14286 Beach Blvd., Ste. 31, 223-0991. F 2016 Best of Jax Winner. SEE BEACHES.

DICK’S Wings, 14286 Beach Blvd., Ste. 32, 223-0115. 2016 Best of Jax Winner. SEE ORANGE PARK.

GERMAN SCHNITZEL HAUS, 13475 Atlantic Blvd., Ste. 40, 221-9700, germanjax.com. Authentic German/fusion fare: schnitzels, plus bratwurst, stroganoff, käsesspätzle. 13 German beers in bottles, on tap. Bar bites, cocktails. Outdoor BierGarten. HH Tu-Thur. $$ FB L & D Tu-Su LARRY’S, 10750 Atlantic Blvd., Ste. 14, 642-6980. F SEE O.PARK. SURFWICHES Sandwich Shop, 14286 Beach Blvd., Ste. 29, 559-5301. SEE BEACHES.

MANDARIN, NW ST. JOHNS

AKEL’s Deli, 12926 Granbay Pkwy. W., 880-2008. F SEE DOWNTOWN.

AL’S Pizza, 11190 San Jose Blvd., 260-4115. F 2016 Best of Jax Winner. SEE BEACHES.

GEORGE O'LOUGHLIN

O'Loughlin Pub

6975 A1A S., St. Augustine Born in: St. Augustine Years in the Biz: 32 Fave Restaurant: Culhane's Irish Pub, (other than my own) Atlantic Beach Fave Cuisine Style: European/Celtic Fave Ingredient: Bacon grease Ideal Meal: Duck wings braised in Guinness, mashed potatoes Will Not Cross My Lips: Raw onion Insider's Tip: Blend Irish and Asian fare – incredible!

Taste Treat: Breakfast bacon cupcake place. Blackened snapper, sesame tuna, Ragtime shrimp. Daily HH, brunch Sun. $$ FB L D Daily SALT LIFE Food Shack, 1018 Third St. N., 372-4456, saltlife foodshack.com. Specialty items, signature tuna poke bowl, fresh sushi, Ensenada tacos, local fried shrimp. $$ FB K TO L D Daily SEACHASERS, 831 First St. N., 372-0444, seachasers.com.

New place; four areas: First Street Bar, Music Room, Beach Bar, Dining Room. Daily HH. In or on patio. $$ FB L D Daily SLIDERS Seafood Grille & Oyster Bar, 218 First St., NB, 246-0881, slidersseafoodgrille.com. Beach-casual spot.

Faves: Fresh fish tacos, gumbo. Key lime pie, ice cream sandwiches. Brunch Sun. $$ FB K L Sa/Su; D Nightly SURFWICHES Sandwich Shop, 1537 Penman Rd., 241-6996, surfwiches.com. Craft sandwich shop. Yankee-style steak sandwiches, hoagies, all made to order. $ BW TO K L D Daily THIS CHICK’S KITCHEN, 353 Sixth Ave. S., 778-5404, thischickskitchen.com. Farm-to-table restaurant serving healthful, locally sourced clean meals. Gluten-free, vegan, vegetarian options. $$ TO L D W-Sa V PIZZA, 528 First St. N., 853-6633, vpizza.com. Traditional Neapolitana artisan pizza from Naples – Italy, not Florida, made with fresh ingredients. $$ FB TO L D Daily

DOWNTOWN

AKEL’S Delicatessen, 21 W. Church St., 665-7324. 50 N. Laura St., Ste. 125, 446-3119, akelsdeli.com. F NYC-style deli. Fresh subs, sandwiches, burgers, gyros, wraps, vegetarian, breakfast, signature dressings. $ K TO B L M-F CANDY APPLE Café & Cocktails, 400 N. Hogan, 353-9717, thecan dyapplecafeandcocktails.com. Chef-driven Southern/French cuisine, sandwiches, entrées, salads. $$ FB K L Daily; D Tu-Sa CASA DORA, 108 E. Forsyth St., 356-8282, casadoraitalian. com. F Chef Sam Hamidi serves Italian fare, 40+ years: veal, seafood, pizza. Homemade salad dressing. $ BW K L M-F; D M-Sa

BEACH Diner, 11362 San Jose Blvd., 683-0079. SEE AMELIA. CRUISERS, 5613 San Jose Blvd., 737-2874. 2016 Best of Jax Winner. SEE BEACHES.

DICK’S Wings, 100 Marketside Ave., 829-8134. 965 S.R. 16, 825-4540. 1610 University Blvd. W., 448-2110. 10391 Old St. Augustine, 880-7087. 2016 Best of Jax Winner. SEE ORANGE PARK. ENZA’S Italian Restaurant, 10601 San Jose Blvd., Ste. 109, 268-4458, enzas.net. Family-owned place serves Italian cuisine, veal, seafood, specials. $$$ FB K TO D Tu-Su FIRST COAST Deli & Grill, 6082 St. Augustine Rd., 733-7477.

Pancakes, bacon, sandwiches, burgers, wings. $ K TO B L Daily JAX DINER, 5065 St. Augustine Rd.,739-7070. New spot serves local produce, meats, breads, seafood. $ TO B L Daily METRO Diner, 12807 San Jose Blvd., 638-6185. F 2016 Best of Jax Winner. Dinner nightly. SEE SAN MARCO. NATIVE SUN Natural Foods Market & Deli, 10000 San Jose Blvd., 260-6950, nativesunjax.com. F 2016 Best of Jax Winner. Organic soups, baked items, sandwiches, prepared foods. Juice, smoothie, coffee bar. All-natural organic beer/ wine. $ BW TO K B L D Daily TAPS Bar & Grill, 2220 C.R. 210 W., Ste. 314, 819-1554. 2016 Best of Jax Winner. SEE FLEMING ISLAND.

V PIZZA, 12601 San Jose Blvd., 647-9424. SEE SAN MARCO. WHOLE FOODS Market, 10601 San Jose, Ste. 22, 288-1100, wholefoodsmarket.com. Prepared-food department, 80+ items, full-service/self-service bars: hot, salad, soup, dessert.

Pizza, sushi, sandwich stations. Grapes, Hops & Grinds bar serves wines, beers (craft/tap), coffees. $$ BW K TO B L D Daily

ORANGE PARK

DICK’S Wings & Grill, 6055 Youngerman Cir., 778-1101, dickswingsandgrill.com. 2016 Best of Jax Winner. NASCARthemed restaurant serves 365 varieties of wings, plus halfpound burgers, ribs, salads. $ FB K TO L D Daily

BITE-SIZED At Crave, sit down for a meal that feels like a VACATION

SAIL AWAY

WHILE ST. AUGUSTINE MIGHT STILL BE REELING from the storm, some great restaurants that dish up the freshest ingredients are open and ready to serve. For pure, good food, head to CRAVE, which has a prime spot close to the Saint Augustine Distillery. With wraps and salads, and build-your-own options for both, it’s a customized, delicious, ultra-bright meal.

Crave’s owners, entrepreneurs Andres Guardiola and Renee Spadaro (engaged to be married!), value freshness and taste, and have fun ensuring that’s what you get. Case in point: The restaurant logo is a bright sign with tumbling foodstuffs – and their adorable mushfaced bulldog Lola in the corner.

While several items on the specials board sounded swell, like Happy Hummus ($9.25) or Spicy Shrimp Wrap ($12), this girl wanted a custom salad with everything on it. The base salad, at $6.75, takes three steps: pick your greens, pick your toppings (up to five), and pick your protein. For greens, choose from kale, Romaine or spinach (or a mix of all three); the toppings range from almonds to fresh shredded beets (no pickled beets here) to dried cranberries and sliced almonds; and for protein, there are at least eight: tuna salad ($2), goat cheese (75¢), chicken ($3), shrimp ($5), hummus ($2) and more.

It was a Friday, and on Fridays there’s a fresh ahi tuna ($5) that can go in a wrap or on a salad. I’m not in the habit of turning down a special and I couldn’t have been happier about my selection. The ahi tuna was outrageously good. The fish was seasoned and marinated just right, so it wasn’t overpowering and you could taste the freshness. The thin slices were fanned out on top of the salad – each bite was so tender, it almost melted. Pulling all these together are Crave’s great dressings. With options like garlic

BITE-SIZED

CRAVE

134 Riberia St., St. Augustine, 293-6373, Facebook.com/Crave-St-Augustine1657819034535595/?fref=ts nutritional yeast and Thai peanut dressing, it’s tough to figure out which dressing to choose.

The Crave team has put together a few amazing smoothie options for ordering ease and, of course, a build-your-own option, too. I opted for one from the menu, the Fruit of Life ($5.75), which you can get with almond milk or coconut water. The creamier the better when it comes to smoothies, so almond milk was the obvious choice for this gal. The Fruit of Life is replete with antioxidant-rich berries, giving the smoothie a deep purple color fit for royalty. You can choose add-ons, like protein and superfoods and greens, for when your life needs just a little extra boost.

Crave’s selections will make your body happy, but I haven’t even gotten to the best part – its location. Close to several marinas, this unassuming spot has some serious real estate. You’ll want to sit and stay a while on the covered patio, with two rows of picnic tables where the water and seabreeze make you feel like you’re on vacation, even if you’re not. Watching the hypnotizing bobbing of the docked boats, you may find your mind wander to rigging the sails and escaping everyday responsibilities. But you’d have to leave behind the colorful and palatable plates Crave dishes up, so I’m betting you’ll be happy to stay.

Brentley Stead biteclub@folioweekly.com OCTOBER 26 - NOVEMBER 1, 2016 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | 31

DINING DIRECTORY PINT-SIZED

WANNA TALK ABOUT

BALLING, BLOW-OFF & PROTEASE?

Homebrewing can be simple or a COMPLEX SCIENCE with tricky vocab HOMEBREWERS ARE AN EXTREMELY PASSIONATE bunch. Have a conversation with one and you’ll likely get an earful of terms like attenuation, specific gravity and Saccharomyces. So dedicated to the craft are these brewing madmen and madwomen that it’s not unusual for them to spend months producing batch after batch of the same brew, tweaking the recipe to get it just right.

Until 1979, it was illegal to brew beer at home.

President Jimmy Carter, whose infamous brother Billy lent his name to a short-lived beer brand, put an end to the Prohibition-era ban on homebrewing when he signed a bill that February.

Homebrewers have come a long way since to advance the methods used to create tasty beers.

Some have been so successful, they’ve gone on to found their own breweries and brewpubs. To those enterprising souls, the art of homebrewing was a labor of love that led to a new career in the rapidly expanding craft beer industry.

Homebrewing is about two things: ingredients and process. The basic ingredients needed to produce a quality homebrew are water, malt, hops and yeast. The art is to skillfully combine these ingredients and manage the brewing process.

Fortunately for new brewers, there are a few virtually foolproof methods to coax a tasty beverage from these items. One of the easiest is called extract brewing. This method uses canned malt extract rather than the actual grains. Because the extract is simply added to boiling water and hops are added separately, this is generally considered the easiest way to homebrew. From this base, homebrewers can build skills and graduate to partial-mash, in which both extracts and malts are used, and then all-grain.

The actual process of brewing involves eight vital steps:

PINT-SIZED

•Sanitation: Perhaps the most important of all •steps, because beer is extremely susceptible •to contamination; therefore, to reduce the •chance of rogue bacteria, all equipment must •be sparkling clean.

•Mashing: When the malt extract or grains are •added to hot water.

•Boiling: In this step, hops are added for •bitterness to balance the malts’ sweet flavors.

•Cooling: Before yeast can be added, the •liquid – called wort – must be cooled to make •it suitable for the yeast. Too hot, and the yeast •will perish; too cool, and it will not do its work.

•Pitching: This is the act of adding the yeast to •the cooled wort.

•Fermenting: In this step, the yeast works its •magic to convert sugars in the wort to •alcohol and carbon dioxide.

•Bottling: When fermentation is complete •– usually in two to four weeks – the beer is •transferred from the fermenter to bottles or •kegs, with a small amount of sugar to •promote carbonation.

•Enjoy!

Marc Wisdom marc@folioweekly.com ______________________________________ You can watch brewers perform most of these steps at 11 a.m., Sat., Nov. 5 at St. Augustine Brewing Solutions, 215 W. King St., Ste. 2. The free demonstration is part of Homebrewers Association’s National Learn to Homebrew Day. Details at staugustinebeerbrewingsolutions.com.

Club sandwiches a mile high are just one of the many delicious menu items at Derby on Park in 5 Points photo by Dennis Ho

The HILLTOP, 2030 Wells Rd., 272-5959, hilltop-club.com.

Southern style fine dining. New Orleans shrimp, certified Black Angus prime rib, she-crab soup, desserts. Extensive bourbon selection. $$$ FB D Tu-Sa LARRY’S Giant Subs, 1330 Blanding Blvd., Ste. 165, 276-7370. 1545 C.R. 220, 278-2827. 700 Blanding Blvd., Ste. 15, 272-3553. 5733 Roosevelt Blvd., 446-9500. 1401 S. Orange Ave., Green Cove, 284-7789, larryssubs.com. F All over the area, Larry’s piles ’em high, serves ’em fast; 36+ years. Hot & cold subs, soups. Some Larry’s serve breakfast. $ K TO B L D Daily METRO Diner, 2034 Kingsley Ave., 375-8548. F 2016 Best of Jax Winner. Dinner nightly. SEE SAN MARCO. The ROADHOUSE, 231 Blanding Blvd., 264-0611, roadhouse online.net. Sandwiches, wings, burgers and quesadillas for 35+ years. 75+ imported beers. $ FB L D Daily The URBAN BEAN Coffeehouse Café, 2023 Park Ave., 541-4938, theurbanbeancoffeehouse.com. Locally-owned-&operated. Coffee, espresso, smoothies, teas. Omelets, bagels, paninis, flatbread, hummus, salads, desserts. $$ K TO B L D Daily

PONTE VEDRA BEACH

HAWKERS ASIAN Street Fare, 1001 Park St., 508-0342, hawkerstreetfare.com. 2016 Best of Jax Winner. Authentic dishes from mobile stalls: BBQ pork char sui, beef haw fun, Hawkers baos, chow faan, grilled Hawker skewers. $ BW TO L D Daily HOBNOB, 220 Riverside Ave., Ste. 110, 513-4272, hobnob withus.com. Unity Plaza. Global inspiration, local intention – ahi poke tuna, jumbo lump crab tacos. $$ FB TO R L D Daily IL DESCO, 2665 Park St., 290-6711, ildescojax.com.

Authentic Italian cuisine, like wood-fired pizzas, pasta made daily onsite, baked Italian dishes, raw bar, spaghetti tacos. Daily HH. $$-$$$ FB K TO L D Daily JOHNNY’S Deli & Grille, 474 Riverside Ave., 356-8055. F Casual spot; made-to-order sandwiches, wraps, breakfast. $ TO B L M-Sa KNEAD Bakeshop, 1173 Edgewood Ave. S., 634-7617.

Locally owned, family-run shop specializing in made-fromscratch creations – classic pastries, artisan breads, savory pies, specialty sandwiches, soups. $ TO B L Tu-Su LARRY’S Subs, 1509 Margaret, 674-2794. 7895 Normandy, 781-7600. 8102 Blanding, 779-1933. F SEE ORANGE PARK. LITTLE JOE’S Café, 245 Riverside Ave., Ste. 195, 791-3336.

Riverview café. Soups, signature salad dressings. $ TO B L M-F METRO Diner, 4495 Roosevelt Blvd., 999-4600. F 2016 Best

SEE BEACHES.

MOON RIVER Pizza, 1176 Edgewood Ave. S., 389-4442. F

AL’S Pizza, 635 A1A, 543-1494. F 2016 Best of Jax Winner.

BEACH Diner, 880 A1A N., Ste. 2, 273-6545. SEE AMELIA. LARRY’S Subs, 830 A1A N., Ste. 6, 273-3993. F SEE O.PARK. METRO Diner, 340 Front St., Ste. 700, 513-8422. F 2016 Best of Jax Winner. SEE SAN MARCO.

TRASCA & CO. Eatery, 155 Tourside Dr., Ste. 1500, 395-3989, trascaandco.com. New eatery specializes in handcrafted Italian-inspired sandwiches, craft beers – many local choices – and craft coffees. $$ BW TO L R D Daily

RIVERSIDE, 5 PTS, WESTSIDE

13 GYPSIES, 887 Stockton St., 389-0330, 13gypsies.com.

2016 Best of Jax Winner. Authentic Mediterranean cuisine: chorizo, tapas, blackened cod, pork skewers, coconut mango curry chicken. Breads from scratch onsite. $$ BW L D Tu-Sa, R Sa AL’S Pizza, 1620 Margaret St., Ste. 201, 388-8384. F 2016 Best of Jax Winner. SEE BEACHES.

BLACK SHEEP, 1534 Oak St., 355-3793, blacksheep5points. com. 2016 Best of Jax Winner. New American, Southern; local source ingredients. Daily specials, rooftop bar. HH. $$$ FB R Sa & Su; L M-F; D Nightly BREW Five Points, 1024 Park St., 714-3402, brewfivepoints. com. F Local craft beers, espresso, coffees, wine. Rotating drafts, 75+ can craft beers, tea. Waffles, toasts, desserts, coffees. $$ BW K B L Daily; late nite Tu-Sa BRIXX Wood Fired Pizza, 220 Riverside Ave., 300-3928, brixxpizza.com. New place offers pizzas, pastas, soups.

Gluten-free options. Daily specials, buy-one-get-one pizzas 10 p.m.-close. $$ FB K TO L D Daily CORNER TACO, 818 Post St., 240-0412, cornertaco.com.

Made-from-scratch “Mexclectic street food,” tacos, nachos, gluten-free, vegetarian options. $ BW L D Tu-Su CUMMER CAFÉ, Cummer Museum of Art & Gardens, 829 Riverside Ave., 356-6857, cummer.org. 2016 Best of Jax Winner. Light lunch, quick bites, locally roasted coffee, espresso-based beverages, homemade soups, sandwiches, gourmet desserts, daily specials. Dine in or in gardens. $ BW K L D Tu; L W-Su DERBY on PARK, 1068 Park St., 379-3343, derbyonpark.net.

New American cuisine, upscale retro in historic building. Oak Street Toast, shrimp & grits, lobster bites, 10-oz. gourmet burger.

Dine inside or out. $$ FB TO Brunch Sa/Su; B, L D Tu-Su EUROPEAN STREET Café, 2753 Park St., 384-9999. 130+ import beers, 20 on tap. Sandwiches. Outside dining at some EStreets. $ BW K L D Daily GRASSROOTS Natural Market, 2007 Park St., 384-4474, thegrassrootsmarket.com. F Juice bar uses certified organic fruits, veggies. Artisanal cheeses, 300 craft, import beers, 50 organic wines, produce, meats, vitamins, herbs, wraps, sides, sandwiches. $ BW TO B L D Daily

32 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | OCTOBER 26 - NOVEMBER 1, 2016

of Jax Winner. SEE SAN MARCO.

2016 Best of Jax Winner. SEE AMELIA ISLAND.

M SHACK, 1012 Margaret St., 423-1283. SEE BEACHES. RAIN DOGS, 1045 Park St., 379-4969. 2016 Best of Jax Winner.

Local-centric bar food: boiled peanuts, hummus, chili, cheese plate, pork sliders, nachos, herbivore items. $ D Nightly SOUTHERN ROOTS Filling Station, 1275 King St., 513-4726, southernrootsjax.com. 2016 Best of Jax Winner. Healthy, fresh, light vegan fare; local, organic ingredients. Specials, on bread, local greens/rice, change daily. Sandwiches, coffees, teas. $ Tu-Su SUSHI Café, 2025 Riverside Ave., Ste. 204, 384-2888, sushi cafejax.com. F 2016 Best of Jax Winner. Monster, Rock-n-Roll, Dynamite Roll. Hibachi, tempura, katsu, teriyaki. Indoors or patio dining. $$ BW L D Daily

ST. AUGUSTINE

AL’S Pizza, 1 St. George St., 824-4383. F 2016 Best of Jax Winner. SEE BEACHES.

CRUISERS Grill, 3 St. George St., 824-6993. 2016 Best of Jax

Winner. SEE BEACHES.

DICK’S Wings & Grill, 4010 U.S. 1 S., 547-2669. 2016 Best of Jax Winner. SEE ORANGE PARK.

The FLORIDIAN, 72 Spanish St., 829-0655, thefloridianstaug. com. 2016 Best of Jax Winner. Updated Southern fare; fresh, local ingredients sourced from area farms. Vegetarian, gluten-free option. Signature fried green tomato bruschetta, blackened fish cornbread stack; grits w/shrimp/fish/tofu. $$$ BW K TO L D W-M GYPSY CAB Company, 828 Anastasia Blvd., 824-8244, gypsy cab.com. F Local mainstay 33+ years. Varied urban cuisine menu changes twice daily. Signature dish: Gypsy chicken.

Seafood, tofu, duck, veal. $$ FB R Su; L D Daily MARDI GRAS Sports Bar, 123 San Marco Ave., 347-3288, mardibar.com. Wings, nachos, shrimp, chicken, Phillys, sliders, soft pretzels. $$ FB TO L D Daily MBQUE, 604 Anastasia Blvd., 484-7472. New Southern-style, fresh-casual. Handspun milkshakes, super kale salad. Housemade rubs, sauces. Platters, ribs, brisket, sweet/spicy pulled/ chopped pork, chicken, sausage. $$ BW K TO L D Daily MELLOW MUSHROOM, 410 Anastasia Blvd., 826-4040. F Bite Club. 2016 Best of Jax Winner. SEE BEACHES.

O’LOUGHLIN Pub, 6975 A1A S., 429-9715. New family-ownedand-operated. Authentic fish & chips, shepherd’s pie, corned beef & cabbage, bangers & mash, duck wings. $$ FB K TO L D Daily SALT LIFE Food Shack, 321 A1A Beach Blvd., 217-3256.

SEE BEACHES.

METRO Diner, 1000 S. Ponce de Leon Blvd., 758-3323. F 2016 Best of Jax Winner. Serving dinner nightly. SEE SAN MARCO. SHANGHAI NOBBY’S, 10 Anastasia Blvd., 547-2188. Cubanstyle, Philly cheesesteak sandwiches. $$ FB

SAN MARCO, SOUTHBANK

BEACH Diner, 1965 San Marco Blvd., 399-1306. SEE AMELIA. The BEARDED PIG Southern BBQ & Beer Garden, 1224 Kings Ave., 619-2247, thebeardedpigbbq.com. 2016 Best of Jax Winner. Barbecue joint offers Southern style BBQ, like brisket, pork, chicken, sausage, beef; veggie platters. $$ BW K TO Daily BISTRO AIX, 1440 San Marco Blvd., 398-1949, bistrox.com.

F Mediterranean/French inspired menu changes seasonally.

250+ wine list. Wood-fired oven baked, grilled specialties: pizza, pasta, risotto, steaks, seafood. Hand-crafted cocktails, specialty drinks. Dine outside. HH M-F. $$$ FB L D Daily EUROPEAN Street Café, 1704 San Marco, 398-9500. SEE RIVERSIDE. FUSION SUSHI, 1550 University Blvd. W., 636-8688, fusionsush ijax.com. F Upscale sushi spot serves fresh sushi, sashimi, hibachi, teriyaki, kiatsu, seafood. $$ K L D Daily INDOCHINE, 1974 San Marco Blvd., 503-7013. 2016 Best of Jax Winner. SEE DOWNTOWN.

KITCHEN on San Marco, 1402 San Marco Blvd., 396-2344, kitchenonsanmarco.com. Gastropub serves local, national craft beers, specialty cocktails. Seasonal menu, with fresh, locally sourced ingredients. $$ FB R Su; L D Daily METRO Diner, 3302 Hendricks Ave., 398-3701, metrodiner. com. F 2016 Best of Jax Winner. Original upscale diner in a historic 1930s-era building. Meatloaf, chicken pot pie, soups.

This one serves dinner nightly. $$ B R L D Daily PIZZA PALACE Restaurant & Pizzeria, 1959 San Marco Blvd., 399-8815, pizzapalacejax.com. F Family-owned-&-operated; spinach pizza, chicken spinach calzones, ravioli, lasagna, parmigiana. Dine outside. HH. $$ BW K TO L D Daily TAVERNA, 1986 San Marco Blvd., 398-3005, tavernasanmarco. com. Chef Sam Efron’s authentic Italian; tapas, wood-fired pizza.

Seasonal local produce, meats. Craft beer (some local), handcrafted cocktails, award-winning wine. $$$ FB K TO R L D Daily V PIZZA, 1406 Hendricks Ave., 527-1511, vpizza.com. True Neapolitana pizzas with the freshest ingredients – a rare class of artisan pizza from Naples. $$ FB to L D Daily

SOUTHSIDE, TINSELTOWN

ALHAMBRA Theatre & Dining, 12000 Beach Blvd., 641-1212, alhambrajax.com. USA’s longest-running, 50 years. Executive Chef DeJuan Roy’s themed menus. Reservations. $$ FB D Tu-Su The CHATTY CRAB, 9041 Southside Blvd., Ste. 138C, 888-0639, chattycrab.com. Chef Dana Pollard’s raw oysters, Nawlins-style low country boil, po’ boys, 50¢ wing specials. $$ FB K TO L D Daily DICK’S Wings, 10750 Atlantic Blvd., 619-0954. 2016 Best of Jax Winner. SEE ORANGE PARK.

EUROPEAN Street Café, 5500 Beach, 398-1717. SEE RIVERSIDE. GREEK Street Café, 3546 St. Johns Bluff Rd. S., Ste. 106, 503-0620, greekstreetcafe.com. Fresh, authentic, modern; Greek owners. Gyros, spanakopita, dolmades, falafel, salads, nachos. Award-winning wines. $$ BW K TO L D M-Sa LARRY’S Subs, 3611 St. Johns Bluff Rd. S., 641-6499. 4479 Deerwood Lake Pkwy., 425-4060. F SEE ORANGE PARK. MARIANAS GRINDS, 11380 Beach Blvd., Ste. 10, 206-6126596. Pacific Islander fare, chamorro culture. Soups, stews, fitada, beef oxtail, katden pika; empanadas, lumpia, chicken relaguen, BBQ-style ribs, chicken. $$ TO B L D Tu-Su MELLOW MUSHROOM, 9734 Deer Lake Ct., 997-1955. F Bite Club. 2016 Best of Jax Winner. SEE BEACHES.

M SHACK, 10281 Midtown Pkwy., 642-5000. SEE BEACHES. OVINTE, 10208 Buckhead Branch Dr., 900-7730, ovinte.com.

Italy, Spain, Mediterranean flavor. Small plates, tapas, charcuterie: ceviche fresco, pappardelle bolognese, lobster ravioli. 240-bottle/ wines, 75/glass; craft spirits. $$ FB R, Su; D Nightly TAVERNA YAMAS, 9753 Deer Lake Ct., 854-0426, taverna yamas.com. F Bite Club. Charbroiled kabobs, seafood, desserts.

Greek wines, daily HH. Bellydancing. $$ FB K TO L D Daily TOSSGREEN, 4375 Southside Blvd., Ste. 12, 619-4356. 4668 Town Crossing Dr., Ste. 105, 686-0234. Custom salads, burritos, burrito bowls; fruit, veggies, 100% natural chicken,

DINING DIRECTORY

sirloin, shrimp, tofu, cheese, dressing, salsa, frozen yogurt. $$ K TO L D Daily

SPRINGFIELD, NORTHSIDE

ANDY’S Grill, 1810 W. Beaver St., 354-2821, jaxfarmers market.com. Jax Farmers Market. Local, regional, international produce. Breakfast, sandwiches, snacks, beverages. $ B L D Mon.-Sat. BARZ Liquors & Fish Camp, 9560 Heckscher Dr., 251-3330.

Authentic fish camp, biker-friendly, American-owned. Package

DISPATCHES FROM THE

store. $ FB L D Daily DICK’S Wings, 12400 Yellow Bluff Rd., 619-9828. 450077 S.R. 200, 879-0993. 2016 Best of Jax Winner. SEE ORANGE PARK. HOLA Mexican Restaurant, 1001 N. Main St., 356-3100, holamexicanrestaurant.com. F Authentic fresh fajitas, burritos, specials, enchiladas, more. HH; sangria. BW K TO L D M-Sa LARRY’S Subs, 12001 Lem Turner Rd., 764-9999. SEE O. PARK. MELLOW MUSHROOM, 15170 Max Leggett Pkwy., 757-8843.

F 2016 Best of Jax Winner. SEE BEACHES.

CHEFFED-UP

PUMPKIN PATCH

Don’t let 90° weather BURST your autumn bubble OCTOBER IS A WONDERFUL TIME OF YEAR. The trees begin to change colors, there’s a crisp nip in the air, the first frost is on the horizon ... not! This is Florida!

October is still great because of two things: Halloween and pumpkins, which go hand-in-hand.

Halloween is a wonderful, yet twisted, celebration. Though Halloween doesn’t represent any significant historical event and its religious ties are blurred, we Americans have embraced it, tweaked it, and made it into a celebration of junk food, especially candy – and not just any candy, but the super-cheap, massproduced, high-fructose corn syrup crap!

That’s what I’m talking about – an entire pillowcase full of individually wrapped, empty-calorie goodness. Is this my secret guilty food obsession?

The temperature here in the 904 is also perfect for Halloween; you can wear any costume and not worry about freezing to death during trick-or-treating (or bar-hopping).

The only drawback to our beautiful weather is that pumpkins have very short shelf lives. Jack o’lanterns tend to rot in a couple of days, turning into squishy, buginfested, molding masses that make you wonder if that time spent carving them was worth it. Get over yourself, of course it was!

Yet pumpkins can serve another equally wonderful purpose: food.

Traditionally, Americans eat pumpkins in pies. If I close my eyes, I can almost smell the spice, taste the sweet, soft custard, and anticipate the inevitable whipped Chantilly cream garnish. Yummm!

Yet pumpkin can also be utilized as a savory dish with surprisingly delectable results. See, kids, a pumpkin is nothing but a hard winter squash. Therefore it can be used interchangeably with other squashes such as butternut or acorn. It also has a texture and flavor profile similar to a sweet potato.

Do you see where I’m going? How about some pumpkin risotto, or pumpkin ravioli with brown butter and sage? You could also try it in Indian or Asian cuisine.

On that vein, try this Thai pumpkin curry; I know I’ll be eating it this Halloween season.

CHEF BILL’S PUMPKIN & CHICKEN CURRY

Ingredients • 1 small baking pumpkin, approx. 1 lb.

• 1 yellow onion, small dice • 1 Tbs. ginger, minced • 1/2 cup cilantro, chopped • 2-1/2 Tbs. green curry paste • 1-1/5 lb. chicken thighs, • boneless, skinless • 1/2 cup red bell pepper, large dice • 1/2 cup yellow bell pepper, large dice • 3 Thai bird chilies, 1/16th-inch slices • 1 lime, juiced • 2 Tbsp. brown sugar • 2 Tbsp. fish sauce • 1 can coconut milk • 1/2 cup Thai basil, torn Directions: 1. Cut pumpkin in half lengthwise. Scrape out the seeds, save for toasting.

2. Cut each half into 1-1/2-inch wedges, trim off the skin and cut into 1-inch cubes.

3. Blanch pumpkin in salted water until just tender.

4. Process onion, ginger, lemongrass and curry paste in a food processer until fairly smooth.

5. Cut the chicken thighs into 2-inch squares. Heat oil in a wok and stir-fry for three minutes until cooked. Remove to a plate.

6. Add curry paste mix to wok and quickly toast, add all the peppers, stir, add brown sugar and coconut milk.

7. Bring mixture to a simmer and add lime juice and fish sauce.

8. Return the chicken and simmer for about five minutes. Add basil.

Adjust seasoning.

9. Serve with steamed jasmine rice.

CHEFFED-UP

Until we cook again,

Chef Bill cheffedup@folioweekly.com ____________________________________ Contact Chef Bill Thompson, owner of Amelia Island Culinary Academy in Historic Fernandina Beach, at cheffedup@folioweekly.com with your recipes or questions, to find inspiration and get you Cheffed Up! OCTOBER 26 - NOVEMBER 1, 2016 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | 33

PETS LOOKIN’ FOR LOVE FOLIO

PET

W E E K LY

FOLIO LIVING

LOVERS’

GUIDE

DEAR DAVI

HOWL-O-WEENIE Tips and ideas to celebrate the scariest holiday of the year with your FUR BABIES

Dear Davi, Tricky treats and dangerous streets make Halloween a scary night for pets. How can we have a spook-free holiday and still have fun?

Norman the Newfoundland Norman, Because we are not clued in to the haunts and howls of the holiday, Halloween can turn even a friendly ghost into a scaredycat. Don’t dismay. I’ve sniffed out some ways you and your human can bring on the fun without the fright — unless that’s your thing, in which case, scare on.

HOST A HOWL-O-WEEN PARTY

Invite your playmates from the park for a spook-tacular celebration. A party is a fun way for you and your furry friends to mingle, romp and enjoy tasty Halloween treats, like bone biscuits and pumpkin pops.

When planning your party, keep your fourlegged pals in mind: • Hold a party in a place with plenty of • space to play.

• Keep festivities short, maybe an hour • or two — even party animals can • tucker •out before midnight.

• Decorate with anything scary, ghostly • and gross — something spidery is a • nice touch. Make sure the decorations are • out of reach of pets — streamers or • plastic pieces can be choking hazards.

• Organize a few games — like bobbing • for eyeballs or bark-O-lantern!

• Give guests a doggie bag filled with • ghoulish goodies before they sneak • out the door.

HAVE A COSTUME PET PARADE

With Halloween creeping around the corner, why not round up the hounds in your ’hood to dress up for fun?

• Get into the spirit by wearing • something to resemble a superhero, • another animal or a favorite food —

• I’m going as a candy corn dog!

•Clear a short path in a safe area to avoid •pranksters or potential hazards.

•Invite friends to watch from the •sidewalk while pets and their people •prance around the block, decked out in •festive or ghastly garb.

•Once the parade is over, head to a •happy haunt for a wrap-up with prizes •and treats.

HAVE A SCARY MOVIE NIGHT

A scary movie marathon can be a thrilling way to spend Halloween. Invite some of your closest canine buds for creepy cult classics sure to have dogs — and humans — jumping out of their skins.

• Get lots of comfy pillows, blankets and • pet beds to set the stage.

• Keep the lights low — there’s nothing like • darkness to make things super-spooky.

• Serve a frightful feast of snacks and • treats to nosh while watching movies.

• Pick from spine-chilling flicks like The • Shining or Texas Chainsaw Massacre, or • something more tame, like Ghostbusters • or Gremlins. If you want to make • your guests scream and bark, show • Pet Sematary or Cujo. For the meek, • stick with an old-time favorite, like It’s • the Great Pumpkin, Charlie Brown. I • recommend Frankenweenie.

• Schedule intermissions for potty walks • and bathroom breaks.

• Offer toys for those who’ve already • seen the film.

No matter how you celebrate, make sure you celebrate safely: aspca.org/pet-care/ general-pet-care/halloween-safety-tips.

Boo! Davi mail@folioweekly.com ____________________________________ Davi the dachshund may have been bred to hunt badgers, but he’s not a psycho killa … or is he?

PET TIP: JUST SAY NO TO BALLS HAIRBALLS ARE A DISGUSTING PART OF CAT OWNERSHIP. Gross fact: a FWM staffer once heard a tale about a baby eating a hairball off the carpet. True story. Now that you’re gagged out, there are ways to prevent hairballs, which, in rare cases cause severe health problems for cats. Per WebMD, you can prevent hairballs by grooming your cat regularly, using a special food to prevent them, using hairball laxative (might wanna skip that one), and discouraging excessive grooming by teaching your cat a new trick, like how to find the end of the toilet paper roll. Anything’s better than hairballs, even shredded TP all over the place.

34 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | OCTOBER 26 - NOVEMBER 1, 2016

PET EVENTS BENEFIT FOR SEA TURTLE HOSPITAL • Aardwolf Brewing holds this benefit from 6-8 p.m. on Wed., Oct. 26 at Brewz N Dawgz, 1974 U.S. 17, St. Augustine. A turtle-themed draft and swag are featured. Proceeds benefit the sea turtle hospital at UF Whitney Lab, whitney.ufl.edu.

HALLOWEEN BARK-TACULAR • DogTown USA holds a dog costume contest, treats, pet photos, onsite adoptions, 11 a.m.-2 p.m. Sat., Oct. 29, 11740 San Jose Blvd., Mandarin, 337-9480, dogtownresorts.com.

ADOPTABLES

MASON

CAR ENTHUSIAST • Well, hello there! I’m Mason and I love all things cars. My hobbies include going for long walks, treats, and did I mention car rides?

I’m a fun and handsome guy … so handsome, I’d like to be the only dog for you. Don’t worry, though, once you take me home, you won’t need any dog but me. Come see me at Jacksonville Humane Society, open 7 days a week!

HOWL-O-WEEN PET PARADE • Dress your pet and yourself in costume and walk in the inaugural pet parade, 3 p.m. Sat., Oct. 29, Mission Nombre de Dios, St. Augustine, 27 Ocean Ave., free, mypetcamp.com. Friendly pets may walk.

Costume prizes awarded.

KATZ 4 KEEPS ADOPTION DAYS • Planned adoption days through December are held 11 a.m.-3 p.m.

Sat. and Sun., Nov. 5 and 6, Nov. 19 and 20, Dec. 3 and 4 and Dec. 17 and 18, at Katz 4 Keeps, 935B A1A N., Ponte Vedra, 834-3223, katz4keeps.org.

ADOPTABLES

BLANE

MAGIC MAN • Greetings. My name is Blane. I am a professional magician who can make tuna disappear in the blink of an eye. I am a lover of catnip, toys and, of course, tuna. Come see what other tricks I have up my sleeve! I currently reside at Jacksonville Humane Society, 8464 Beach Blvd., Southside. More information about adoptables like Blane is available at jaxhumane.org.

VACCINATION CLINICS • VetCo offers lower-cost pet vaccinations at area PetCo stores. Sun., Oct. 30: 10:30 a.m.-noon, 463713 S.R. 200, Yulee, 225-0014; 2-3 p.m. 11900 Atlantic Blvd., Southside, 997-8441; 4-5 p.m., 950 Marsh Landing Pkwy., Jax Beach, 273-0964; vetcoclinics.com. _____________________________________ To list a pet event, send the event name, time, date, location (complete street address and city), admission price, contact number/website to print, to mdryden@folioweekly.com – at least two weeks before the event.

OCTOBER 26 - NOVEMBER 1, 2016 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | 35

FREEWILL ASTROLOGY

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Serving Excellence Since 1928 Member American Gem Society

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Ain’t right Head light Talks hoarsely Persian king Wild and crazy, like a pregame party Run of Bit of dust Partner of void Foolish fellow Start of nickname for Florida-Georgia football game Lap of luxury Electric fish Local airport name Dull as dishwater Withdraw from a class Work the suites Wide-eyed Night before the game Car club letters Game name part 2 Skip a class Sea & Sky Spectacular mo.

UF sports org. menu choice Cows and sows Mideast native Peter Put in the game

55 Cry over spilt milk 57 End of game name 63 Michigan-Ohio State football game attire 64 Not moving in traffic 65 Lover boy 67 Speed, for a UGA receiver 68 “Sugar” substitute 69 Tebow’s glow 70 Florida coast 71 “Nobody doesn’t like Lee” 72 Like Shad Khan’s pockets

DOWN

1 An end to sex?

2 Theatre offering 3 Defense acronym 4 Word before “lies the rub” 5“ Across the Water” 6 Got a laugh 7 Lounge around 8 Tex. neighbor 9 Where buffalo roam 10 Out of the way 11 Peyton and Eli, to Archie

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42 UF frat letter 47 See see as sea, say 49 Chump 51 Hertz rival 54 Use the rink 56 Puccini piece 57 Alternative to plastic 58 Guesstimate phrase 59 Pitches in 60 Think tank’s quest 61 50-50 test choice 62 Olden days 63 Dads Club members 66 Osceola National Forest juice

Solution to 10.19.16 Puzzle

P A T H & M D E I C A E A R L K I E V E M P E S A T M C R A F T I N S M U B A A R & D O W E FOLIOWEEKLY.com | OCTOBER 26 - NOVEMBER 1, 2016

S H I N Y R I O T T O F U

T L U E N G A A A L K I L O R N A T E C P E A I N Y V A O G T E

P E R S O N A

B R U T E

L U H A R U S D C O P E A S

S E T H M I E X T S F Y R I T E E N N D T H

A Q U A T I C

R T & A R N E M L E I G

I D E R I S A S E E M N R & B A M C

ARIES (March 21-April 19): Think about what your four great-grandmothers and four great-grandfathers may have been doing on Nov. 1, 1930. What? You have no idea how? You don’t even know their names? If so, remedy your ignorance. Your ability to create the future you want requires you to learn more about where and whom you came from. Halloween costume suggestion: your most interesting ancestor.

TAURUS (April 20-May 20): At any one time, more than 2,000,000 frozen human embryos are stored in tissue banks in Europe and North America. When the time’s right, their owners retrieve them and bring them to term.

Use that scenario as a metaphor for your life in the coming weeks. Second scenario: Scotch whiskey is a potent mind-altering substance. Any particular batch must mature for at least three years, and may be distilled many times. There are now 20 million barrels of the stuff mellowing in Scottish warehouses. What do these scenarios have to do with you? Time to tap into resources you’ve been saving that haven’t been ripe or ready until now.

Halloween costume ideas: a woman nine months pregnant, blooming rose or sunflower, ripe fruit.

GEMINI (May 21-June 20): To create a bottle of Cabernet Sauvignon, a winemaker needs about 700 grapes. Compare this process with rain-making. When water vapor high in the sky becomes dense enough, it condenses into tiny pearls of liquid called cloud droplets. If the humidity rises even more, a million of these babies might band together to form a single raindrop that falls to Earth.

What does this have to do with you? In the weeks ahead, you’ll have an affinity and skill for processes resembling wine-making and rain-making. You’ll need a lot of raw material and energetic effort to produce a small marvel, but that’s as it should be. Halloween costume suggestion: raindrop, bottle of wine.

CANCER (June 21-July 22): Some Brazilians eat the heads of piranhas in the belief they’re aphrodisiacs. In Zimbabwe, women may make strategic use of baboon urine to enhance their allure. The scientific name for Colombia’s leaf-cutter ant is hormiga culona, translated as “fatassed ant.” Ingesting the roasted bodies of these critters is thought to boost sexual desire. Since you’re in a phase when tapping in to your deepest longings will be healthy and educational, adopt elements of those love drugs to create your Halloween costume. Other global exotic aphrodisiacs that may inspire: asparagus, green M&Ms, raw oysters, wild orchids.

LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 22): It’s your cycle’s prosperity-building phase. Celebrate!

Brainstorm! Can you create rituals to stimulate your imagination’s financial lobes, expediting cash flow? Ideas: 1. Glue a photo of you on a $20 bill. 2. Make a wealth shrine in your home. Stock it with symbols of specific thrills you can buy when you have more money. 3. Halloween costume suggestions: giant bar of gold, a banker with a briefcase full of big bills, Tony Stark, Lady Mary Crawley, Jay Gatsby, Yoruban wealth goddess Ajé.

SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21): During this Halloween season, you have cosmic permission to be a bigger, bolder and extra beguiling version of you. Express your deep beauty with precise brilliance, imagine your future with superb panache and wander wherever the hell you feel like wandering. Time to be stronger than your fears and wilder than trivial sins. Halloween costume idea: the superhero version of yourself.

SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21): I won’t say “When life gives you lemons, make lemonade.” I’ll give alternatives. How about this, from video game Portal 2: “When life gives you lemons, don’t make lemonade. Make life take the lemons back! Get mad! Say, ‘I don’t want your damn lemons!’” Or this, from my friend Barney: “When life gives you lemons, draw faces on them like Tom Hanks did on a volleyball in Cast Away, and engage in philosophical conversation.” Or a Brazilian proverb: “When life gives you lemons, make caipirinhas.”

Suggestion: Play around with these themes to create your Halloween costume.

CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19): All of us are creators and destroyers. It’s fun and healthy to add fresh elements to our lives, but it’s crucial to dispose of things that hurt and distort. Even your body is a hotbed of both activities, killing off old cells and generating new ones. You’re in a phase when there’s far more creation than destruction. Enjoy the exalted buzz! Halloween costume thoughts: creator god or goddess like Gaia or Prometheus, Rainbow-Snake of the Australian Aborigines, the Zulus’ Unkulunkulu; Coyote, Raven or Spider Grandmother from indigenous North American tribes.

LEO (July 23-Aug. 22): Do you know how to repair a broken zipper or patch a hole in your bicycle tire? Are you familiar with the art of caulking a bathtub or creating a successful budget? Can you compose a graceful thank-you note, cook a hearty soup from scratch, or overcome pride to reconcile with an ally after an argument?

These are the kinds of tasks to focus on in the weeks ahead. It’s time to be practical and concrete.

Halloween costume suggestion: Mr. or Ms. Fix-It.

AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18): In 1938, chef Ruth Wakefield dreamed up a brilliant invention: chocolate chip cookies.

She sold her recipe to the Nestlé company for one dollar and a lifetime supply of chocolate.

Maybe she was happy with that deal, but I think she cheated herself. Take her action as an example of what you should NOT do. During the next 10 months, you’ll come up with many useful innovations and intriguing departures from the way things have always been done. Get full value in return for your gifts. Halloween costume ideas: Thomas Edison, Marie Curie, Hedy Lamarr, Leonardo da Vinci, Temple Grandin, George Washington Carver, Mark Zuckerberg.

VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22): In Terminator 2, Arnold Schwarzenegger played a benevolent android from the future. As a strong, silent action hero, he didn’t need to say much. In fact, he earned $30,000 for every word he uttered. Hope your speech packs a comparable punch in the next few days. My astrological omenreading suggests your persuasiveness is at a peak.

You’ll have an exceptional ability to say what you mean and mean what you say. Use this power with flair and precision. Halloween costume ideas: Greek orator Demosthenes, Martin Luther King Jr., Sojourner Truth, MC Lyte, and Winston Churchill.

PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20): Speaking on behalf of cosmic powers, I authorize you to escape dull realities and ramble through the frontier. Fantasize more than usual.

Avoid literalists and realists who think you should be more like them. It’s not time to fuss over exacting details, but soar above the sober nonsense and see as far as you can. Exult in the joys of wise innocence. Halloween costume suggestions: bohemian poet, mad scientist, carefree genius, brazen explorer.

Rob Brezsny freewillastrology@freewillastrology.com

NEWS OF THE WEIRD POT FOR PETS

Next month, as nine states ask voters to approve some form of legalization of marijuana, a “new customer base” for the product — pets — was highlighted in an October New York Times report. Dogs and cats are struck with maladies similar to those that humans report in cannabis success stories: seizures, inflammation, anxiety, arthritis and other pain and subsequent social withdrawals. The “high”-producing THC element can’t be used because it’s notoriously toxic to dogs, but other elements in the drug seem to work well not only for dogs and cats but, by anecdotal evidence, pigs, horses and domesticated wild animals.

IS HE RELATED TO YOU-KNOW-WHO?

A 23-year-old woman on a bus in Istanbul, Turkey, was attacked by Abdullah Cakiroglu, 35, in September because, as he told police, he had become “aroused” by her wearing shorts. Initially, he was not arrested, but after a protest on social media, police came to get him — though for “inciting,” not assault. He told police, “I lost myself ” because the woman had “disregarded the values of our country” and “my spiritual side took over, and I kicked her in the face.”

DON’T SAY “FROMAGE”

In September, a court in Paris upheld France’s government ban on people smiling for their passport and identity photos.

One official had challenged the required straightforward pose (“neutral,” “mouth closed”), lamenting that the French should be encouraged to smile to overcome the perpetual “national depression” that supposedly permeates the country’s psyche.

BUT WERE AFRAID TO ASK …

Scientists from England’s Bath University, publishing in a September issue of Nature Communications, report success in creating enduring live mice without use of a fertilized egg. The researchers showed it possible that a sperm cell can “trick” an egg into becoming a full-featured embryo without a “fertilization” process (in which distinct genomes from sperm and egg were thought

to be required, at least in mammals). The scientists were thus able to “challenge nearly two centuries of conventional wisdom.”

Folio Weekly Magazine can help you connect with that surfer hunk you almost talked to at the Young Vegan Professionals meet-up, or that gum-crackin’ goddess at Target who “accidentally” dropped a jasmine-scented kazoo in your cart. Go to folioweekly. com/i-saw-u.html, fill out the FREE form correctly (40 words or fewer, dammit) by 5 p.m. Friday (for the next Wednesday’s FWM) – next stop: Bliss!

TEACH YOUR CHILDREN WELL

Joshua Hunt, 31, was arrested in October inside St. Francis Hospital in Tulsa, Oklahoma, where he’d gone to check on his 9-month-old son, who was being treated for an injury. Police said that while in the ward, he snatched another visitor’s purse and took a cellphone and credit cards.

No left or right swipe here – you can actually use REAL WORDS to find REAL LOVE!

TAKE THAT!

To start: Write a ive-word headline so they’ll recognize you, or them, or the place.

Next: Describe the person, like, “You: Blonde, hot, skanky, tall.”

Then: Describe yourself, like, “Me: Redhead, boring, clean, virgin.”

Next: Describe the encounter, like, “ISU with your posse at Dos Gatos.”

No names, email addresses, websites, etc. And for chrissake keep it at forty (40) words or fewer. Don’t they teach basic counting in kindergarten? Did all y’all miss that lesson because you were out trolling for strange?

TOO MUCH TIME ON THEIR HANDS

MY HOT, SEXY NEIGHBOR You: Tall, white sports jersey (No. 12, I think), flag tattoo. Me: Brunette, sunglasses, busty. While checking mail ISU on balcony playing darts, smoking cigar. Welcome to the neighborhood.

Throw your dart at me anytime. When: Oct. 25.

Where: Coquina Bay Apartments. #1632-1026

Jeffrey Osella, 50, was arrested in August in Westerly, Rhode Island, after allegedly firing corncobs at his neighbor’s house, using a PVC “potato gun,” as part of their longrunning feud. When Osella answered the door, officers said he was shirtless, with corn kernels stuck to his chest.

In an October profile of tech developer and startup savant Sam Altman, The New Yorker disclosed that “many people in Silicon Valley have become obsessed with the simulation hypothesis” — that “what we experience as reality” is just some dark force’s computer simulation (as in the movie The Matrix). “Two tech billionaires,” the magazine reported, are “secretly engag[ing] scientists” to break us out of this alternative universe we might be trapped in. One prominent member of the tech elite remarked at a Vox Media conference in June on how the “simulation hypothesis” seems to dominate all conversation whenever the elites gather.

NICE WORK IF YOU CAN GET IT

On Oct. 1, Michael Daum, 55, began his year in residence as the town hermit of Solothurn, Switzerland, having been chosen from among 22 self-entertaining applicants. The hermit will be required to maintain the town’s isolated hermitage, but also, paradoxically, be called on at times to engage with arriving tourists.

Chuck Shepherd weirdnews@earthlink.net

A YEAR AGO, OCEANWAY PUBLIX Wednesday afternoon before Thanksgiving. Talked in checkout line. Me: Kinda muscular, blue Never Quit shirt. Please forgive my walking away. You: So smokin’ hot I couldn’t believe it; black vehicle. Let me be your somebody! When: Nov. 25, ’15. Where: Oceanway Publix. #1631-1026 CUTE BARTRAM PARK RUNNER We’ve seen each other. You: Dark hair, blue-eyed hottie, running. Me: Dark blonde, ponytail, walking.

Today you said, “Sorry about that.” I smiled, not sure of meaning – sorry about crude car guys.

Points – you’re a gentleman. Single? When: Oct. 17. Where: Bartram Park. #1630-1026 SALMON POLO, RIVERSIDE PUBLIX Going to check-out – bam! ISU. Handsome man.

Facial hair. Fit. Smiled, made eye contact. Thought, “I’ll never see him again.” I pull from lot; you walk in front; noticed your right arm tattoo. No bags? When: Oct. 3. Where: Riverside Publix. #1629-1012 BRUNETTE BEAUTY WALKING TO BEACH Tall brunette walking her most white with mixed colored medium-sized dog. Snake-design comfortable pants, gorgeous body. Me: Waking up, starting day. You were first thing I saw from inside my house. Let’s walk together! When: Sept. 30.

Where: Davis St., Neptune Beach. #1628-1005 MY BUD LIGHT/MARLBORO MAN You: Handsome man working the grill, drinking Bud Light and cooking some good-looking meat on Saturday. Me: Drinking Captain and Coke and fighting the desire to take advantage of you.

Hoping you “grill” again soon! When: Aug. 27.

Where: Downtown. #1627-0928 NEED HELP MOVING? First time ISU, you were moving from your apartment; we caught eyes. Met again, exchanged names. I wanted your number but it’s been so long since someone made me speechless. Come by sometime? You: Pretty. Me: Intrigued. When: Sept.

14. Where: Off JTB. #1626-0921 FIRST WATCH EARTHQUAKE You: Stunningly beautiful lady, long brown hair, shorts, athletic top, waiting for second party Sunday morning.

Me: Tall, dark, handsome guy, kinda cop-looking. Tried to buy your breakfast; you hadn’t ordered. Really wanted to say hello. When: Aug. 28. Where: First Watch Beach Boulevard. #1625-0907 TRADE PORSCHE FOR BEACH CRUISER? Drawn to your physique, adored biceps as you chilled with friend! You complimented my Porsche. Offered trade for your cruiser. Didn’t ask for number. WOD together on next bring-a-friend day?! When: 4 p.m. June 5. Where: Zeta Brewing bicycle stand. #1616-0622

DANCING TO THE BONES You are L. from Ponte Vedra. I’m R, leading band at Conch House on Friday, Aug. 12. We said quick hello as you left. Really want to connect with you. Hopefully cosmos will agree. When: Aug. 12.

Where: Conch House, St. Augustine. #1624-0817 FLOWERS IN MY HAND Very surprised to see you. Positive memories flooded back, so let’s have lunch and catch up. S. When: July 6. Where: Publix Pharmacy. #1623-0810 DO YOU SEEK UNIQUE? You: Beautiful brunette, Walmart sugar aisle, beautiful arm ink work; said you got it in Riverside.

Me: Dark chocolate gentleman, captivated by smile, breathless looking into beautiful eyes. Too shy to get number. Meet for lunch? When: July 16. Where: Walmart Avenues. #1622-0720 HANDSOME, KIND GENTLEMAN ISU Saturday 1 a.m. You: Extremely handsome, cool hat, T-shirt, jeans; forgot wallet; complimented my white dress. Me: Long blond hair, green eyes, too shy to ask name or if unattached. Love to meet formally!

When: July 17. Where: Walmart San Jose. #1621-0720 WE ARE READY FOR U You: Handsome man following, watching me, saying hi, calling, hanging up before u speak. Me: Want to hear your heart. My dog and condo await. Don’t be afraid. Everything will be OK. We love you. When: 2012. Where: Neighborhood. #1620-0720 AVONDALE ANGEL Me: Down on my luck, no place to go. You: Beautiful person who kept me from sleeping on the street.

Thank you for your generosity for someone you didn’t even know! You’ll never ever be forgotten!

When: June 16. Where: Avondale shops. #1619-0706 COOPER’S HAWK NICE SMILE WAITER You weren’t our waiter last Thursday 6/16; served us before. Name starts with G. Cute, dark blond hair, warm personality. Me: Brunette, curly hair, navy blue dress. You noticed us in booth. A drink, conversation? Contact. When: June 16. Where: Cooper’s Hawk Winery Town Center. #1618-0622 CORGI GIRL Your smile’s radiant. How you synchronize those long legs in immense contrast with your pups is marvelous. I’m grateful, mostly handsome, longing to please. Love to join you and poochie for evening stroll along the river. XOXO. When: June 10. Where: Riverside. #1617-0622 COMEDY ZONE Goldberg lookalike, Comedy Zone May 27, admiring each other while waiting with friends. Me: Hot brunette in black tank top and jeans. When: May 27. Where: Comedy Zone. #1608-0525 VYSTAR LOAN OFFICER You: Beautiful blue-eyed, curly blond hair, rockin’ all black outfit, accent colored shirt. Me: Trying to get a loan. Made conversation to keep process going. Second Wednesday in June. Didn’t get loan; might’ve found so much more! When: June 8.

Where: Vystar. #1615-0622

OCTOBER 26 - NOVEMBER 1, 2016 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | 37

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FOLIO VOICES : BACKPAGE EDITORIAL

“I am losing interest in analyzing the mindsets of Trump’s supporters or of Trump himself.

My interest is in whether these supporters will actually vote.”

WITH THE ELECTION LESS THAN TWO WEEKS away, I am now able to sleep until 5 or 6 a.m.

Last year, I would wake at 3 a.m. and worry that our country was going to end. I imagined that America would be lulled into letting a Know Nothing become president and take us to hell. Paraphrasing a famous quotation, “It is a short trip from Empire to tabloid,” as postBrexit Britain is discovering.

Now I realize that the undercurrent of dissatisfaction among a third of the people who can vote will not succeed in taking down our republic if the rest of the voters cast ballots. The inward movement that has taken the shape of a raucous, bawdy party led by the braggadocios, self-centered, rich, uninformed inciter who many Americans feared would destroy our democracy will be halted (but not ended).

I am losing interest in analyzing the mindsets of Donald Trump’s supporters or of Trump himself. My interest is in whether these supporters will actually vote. On Election Day, they may have a hangover from their long run of high-energy antics. When they wake up Nov. 8 and realize that they have participated in a Jonestown-like crusade, they may realize their good luck that the clock ran out before the finale, when their selfproclaimed savior would have passed out the actual Kool-Aid, obliging them to drink up.

They might be too embarrassed to go to the polls, where they will see their neighbors quietly lined up to defeat the dangerous, mean, bigoted man whose displays we have endured for the past 16 months.

When he loses (and if God does bless America, he will), Trump and the other miscreants will nevertheless continue trying to poison our country with their hatred and the conspiracy theories they have promoted during the last two decades.

Many of my acquaintances in Northeast Florida are Trump supporters. Most do not know or care about the issues or even about the advantages that they possess because they live in America. Whatever Donald says today is OK, and when he says the opposite tomorrow, that’s also fine.

One common thread seems to be that most of Trump’s supporters have never attended advanced classes in economics, government, world history, philosophy, the sciences, psychology or world religion. Polls say that there are a greater number of men in these groups than there are women.

African-Americans have had economic and fairness challenges, but most do not support Trump. They know that racism is an electrifying keystone for Trump’s appeal.

PUT THE KOOL-AID DOWN,

AMERICA My take-away after reading many articles in newspapers and in magazines such as The Economist, Newsweek and The Atlantic, and listening to many political analysts, is that there are three main groups of Trump supporters: 1) well-treated seniors of all national origins, 2) descendants of the ScotsIrish, and 3) descendants of Southern and Eastern European immigrants.

Well-treated seniors who contributed a maximum of $20,000 to Social Security if they worked in plants or offices full-time for 45 years (rare for the women of this generation) or were stay-at-home moms who contributed half that amount may each collect $240,000 in monthly benefits over their expected lifetime.

They have been retired 20 years or more, are reimbursed 80 percent of most medical costs and may even live in government-subsidized housing. Their parents and grandparents probably infused them with good work ethics, but likely also influenced them to blame “them” for their problems. Paraphrasing Donald: “And we know who they are!”

Many of the seniors who back Trump fervently believe right-wing commentators to whom they typically listen and watch for hours each day. These prophets tell them that most current workers are not able to pay their bills, that immigrants will take their grandkids’ jobs and that jihadists are going to take over America (and probably behead them).

Among the descendants of the ScotsIrish who arrived in the 1700s and those who arrived in the 1840s during the potato famine, many earlier settlers were successful, including a number of our presidents. Others became farmers in Appalachia, ultimately suffering greatly, especially during the Depression. Some moved to Chicago to work in the meatpacking industry. Those who moved to Detroit to work in the auto plants were left in dire straits when manufacturers downsized and moved. Still others worked in coalmines and steel mills, industries that have shriveled, leaving them jobless. They are the citizens who are the target and sometimes the admirers of the ultra-right movements, including the “Alt-Whites.”

I remember a 30-year-old documentary that featured interviews of autoworkers – and their spouses – who were given buyouts, unemployment benefits and were offered training for jobs in the computer industry after manufacturers moved away. The unskilled workers had been making $24 per hour to do simple tasks that could be completed by lower-paid people or robots. A number of

them raged that they were offered this training and would be expected to work in a different industry for only $10 or $12 per hour. Many felt they deserved to continue in their wellpaid jobs and keep their pension plans.

The third category of Trump’s supporters are the descendants of the millions of Southern and Eastern European immigrants who came to America 100 to 130 years ago to escape religious, racial or political persecution or lack of economic opportunity or famine.

Although life in ethnic neighborhoods usually was difficult and working conditions hazardous, they eventually were accepted in the mainstream, especially after serving in WWII. Many of their descendants apparently did not attend college. Workers without college degrees find it difficult to compete in our society. In addition, they worry that the newer ethnic immigrants will further limit their chances for financial stability.

These descendants of immigrants need to remember why their ancestors left their homes in Europe and worked so hard to become an intrinsic part of the fabric of America.

Though life here was not great for them, their grandparents helped build this country and their grandchildren can have a good life if they stop following the angry crowd, learn new skills and support candidates who will work together as Americans, not as partisans.

I hope, for their sake, the younger Trump supporters will study more vigorously in high school and after graduation continue learning about our political and economic systems, world history, philosophy, and how they and all American workers can compete globally while treating the Earth more respectfully.

I also hope that Trump supporters’ hangovers will not hurt them too badly.

Unfortunately, their misdirected political fervor has already destroyed a HUGE chunk of our country’s optimism and has given our children powerful lessons in crassness, sexual violence and other bullying and insulting tactics, including belittling women, the disabled and ethnic newcomers who may worship differently or are from countries other than Trump’s supporters’ ancestors. Our children have learned that a spoiled, rich celebrity can get his own way at the expense of all Americans.

Repairing this descent into madness will take a long time. We need to begin today. As Pope Francis counseled, “Study the issues, pray and then vote your conscience.”

Colette Corliss Sellers mail@folioweekly.com

____________________________________ Sellers is a CPA in Jacksonville Beach.

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