Folio Weekly 11/11/15

2 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | NOVEMBER 11-17, 2015

THIS WEEK // 11.11-11.17.15 // VOL. 29 ISSUE 33 COVER STORY

POTHOLES IN THE HARDWOOD

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Six-foot-nine-inch high school freshman JARED JONES is young, tall, talented, and on everybody’s radar.

STORY BY JOSUE CRUZ PHOTOS BY DENNIS HO

FEATURED ARTICLES

SHAD KHAN OWNS YOU

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BEYOND THE BOX

BY AG GANCARSKI And he will for a LONG TIME to come

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BY JULIE DELEGAL National movement on prisoner workforce re-entry has roots in Jacksonville’s own OPERATION NEW HOPE

CEREBRAL STYLEY

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BY BRENTON CROZIER SOLILLAQUISTS OF SOUND bring a heady approach and smart focus to the hip-hop scene

COLUMNS + CALENDARS MAIL/B&B FIGHTIN’ WORDS OUR PICKS GUEST EDITORIAL JAGCITY NEWS

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FILM/MAGICLANTERNS 13 ARTS 17 MUSIC 19 LIVE MUSIC CALENDAR 21 THE KNIFE 23 DINING 24

BITE-SIZED LOOKIN’ FOR LOVE I SAW U/ASTROLOGY CLASSIFIEDS CROSSWORD NEWS OF THE WEIRD

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THE MAIL

SAL: SATURDAY AFTERNOON LIVE

READERS RESPOND TO EDITOR MATTHEW B. SHAW’S TAKE ON DONALD TRUMP’S VISIT TO JACKSONVILLE (“#DOWNTOWNISYOUREFIRED,” OCT. 28).

power. What has leading from behind led to?

Before Obama, never worried about cop killings, disrespect of authority, racism like the ’70s, and now ISIS on our soil. If our national security is at risk, everything else like our economy is at risk. All that has occurred over seven years is dividing us from each other.

A good boss builds the team, and doesn’t pit one against the other. If your boss acted like Obama, your office would be a fight ring.

Have a nice evening and I pray you wake up to reality.

Anonymous via email

TRUMP HAS BROUGHT TO AMERICANS’ EYES and ears what illegal immigration is doing to this country and the Rhinos, RNC and liberals can’t stand that people are waking up.

Bonnie Nettles via Facebook

I HAVE MADE THE MISTAKE OF THINKING NO one could seriously want Trump as president. A couple of times, clients have said something about Trump and I have laughed, thinking it was a joke.

I have learned my lesson: Just smile and nod and slowly back away.

Jessica Vinson via Facebook

ALL I GOT TO ASK IS, WHAT HAVE THE Democrats done for us that hasn’t resulted in failure and doubled national debt over seven years? This country is a joke and every other country knows it. They only respect strength and

TELL US, MATT SHAW, WHO DID YOU PISS OFF at Folio Weekly to get sent to cover the gathering of the nincompoops?

Sidney Monteiro via Facebook

If you would like to respond to something that appeared in the pages of Folio Weekly, please send an email (with your name, address and phone number for verification purposes only) to mail@folioweekly.com.

CONTRIBUTORS JJulie Delegal

““Beyond the Box,” pg. 9 Ju Delegal has been a contributor to Folio Weekly since 2009.

Julie In her column Citizen Mama, Delegal discusses a wide range of concerns including education, redistricting, race reconciliation, co alimony reform, feminism, mental health and many other al issues of the day. Her news article this week, “Beyond the Box,” is looks at a local nonprofit that is leading a national charge for lo increased focus on inmate re-entry programs. A Jacksonville in native, Delegal holds a BA in English from the University of n Florida, where she also earned a Women’s Studies Certificate F and graduated Phi Beta Kappa. Delegal is also a regular an contributor to the political website Context Florida and is co working on a novel. She lives in San Marco with her husband, w Tad, with whom she has three children.

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BRICKBATS & BOUQUETS BOUQUETS TO AMELIA ISLAND Condé Nast Travel recently named the idyllic Northeast Florida enclave one of its top 10 U.S. islands. Adding to the archipelago’s draw, this weekend (Nov. 14 and 15) the island – known internationally for its luxurious hotels and B&Bs, eclectic restaurants, and gorgeous beaches – will host nearly 200 teams from around the world for the Petanque America Open.

BOUQUETS TO CARING CHEFS The group’s recent event, which included nearly 70 restaurants and 2,000 guests, raised more than $200,000 for the Children’s Home Society of Florida – a nonprofit dedicated to breaking the cycle of child abuse and neglect.

BRICKBATS TO CYNDI STEVENSON Despite St. Johns County Board of County Commissioners and the city of St. Augustine passing resolutions calling to ban fracking, state representative Stevenson of District 17 (St. Johns) voted for HB 191, a pro-fracking bill in the state House Agriculture & Natural Resources Subcommittee last week that would not only set up a permitting process, but expressly prohibit local governments from having a say in oil and gas exploration and production activities in their jurisdiction.

KNOW SOMEONE WHO DESERVES A BOUQUET? HOW ABOUT A PROVERBIAL BRICKBAT? Send your submissions to mail@folioweekly.com. Submissions should be a maxium of 50 words and directed toward a person, place, or topic of local interest.

4 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | NOVEMBER 11-17, 2015

FIGHTIN’ WORDS

And he will for a LONG TIME to come

SHAD KHAN YOU

OWNS HEY, JACKSONVILLE: SHAD KHAN OWNS YOU. Not literally, of course. Not yet, at least. But on the real; whatever Shad wants, Shad gets.

A term that used to be popular: corporate welfare. Give a company money, it moves here, creates jobs, and City Council gives it up, because who wants to stand in opposition of jobs for the hardworkin’ common man?

However, of late, corporate welfare has taken a different form, as the last two mayoral administrations and City Councils have gone all in on deals with Jaguars owner Shad Khan … the man who has less need for taxpayer money than anyone else in the 904.

During the Alvin Brown administration, the city went $41M deep into new scoreboards for EverBank Field.

The idea was that we needed the Biggest Scoreboards In The World, presumably to count all those big scoring plays created by the golden arm of Blaine “Whoa There M-----F-----” Gabbert.

When that deal went down, this magazine was a lonely voice of opposition.

We may have had a column or two about it; we certainly had a cover story, which got pilloried by a bunch of mouthbreathers who had, all of a sudden, become experts on the previously arcane Bed Tax. It was the kind of deal-making that seemed necessary for Alvin Brown’s re-election!

And for the re-election of councilmembers who voted for it, such as the Reverend Kim Daniels, who got money from the Next Generation Leaders PAC (bankrolled by Khan, Mrs. Peter Rummell, and the Welcome to Rockville promoter who brought Slayer here to play at a public park).

Well, the mayor and his preacher cadences, as well as the preacher who couldn’t decide where she actually lived, are gone. But Khan remains. And so do Khan’s deals.

Khan has been a figure of epic generosity this fall. At the beginning of the football season, he invited councilmembers and their executive council assistants to party down in the owner’s box at Jags games; this led to a stern reprimand from the CoJ Ethics Director Carla Miller, who told them to be mindful of accepting gifts with a value of more than $100.

From there, Khan had a party on the Kismet in October, attended by Mayor Lenny Curry and his chief of staff, that also got noted by Ethics, which determined, somehow, that the value of partying on a billionaire’s yacht with All Gold Errrthing, was just over $63 a person.

What a bargain. That’s the price of six beers and a pretzel at EverBank.

Khan’s gotten cozy with the executive and legislative branches of local government. In October, the Jaguars gave $25K to Build Something That Lasts, a PAC of Lenny Curry supporters who want to put resources into candidates and causes in Jacksonville and beyond.

Also in October: Jaguars CFO Kelly Flanagan’s name was advanced to the JEA Board.

But the Big Enchilada isn’t a board position for a team exec; rather, it’s a $90M deal (in which the city of Jacksonville ponies up $45M of finite capital improvement project funds) for, among other things, an amphitheater at EverBank Field.

Which will be managed by one of Shad Khan’s 583 corporations, of course.

The ordinance authorizes “proposed enhancements [that] will make our National Football League stadium a world-class facility and enhance the fan experience for those who cheer on the Jaguars and come here for the Florida-Georgia game, Taxslayer.com Bowl and other major events.”

Whether the TaxSlayer.com Bowl is a “major event” or not is a matter of real debate. And, to be real, half the fans at the stadium most weeks are there to cheer on the Jaguars’ opponents.

Beyond the amphitheater, the ordinance also funds a covered practice facility and improvements to club seating.

The amphitheater will hold around 5,000 people, which means that it will be suitable for the kind of up-and-coming acts that no Jacksonville promoter would bother with because they’re too busy exhuming Night Ranger/Foreigner/Def Leppard/Color Me Badd for a comeback tour.

And here’s a Gancarski Guarantee: You’ll be able to count those voting against this deal on one hand.

No one wants to cross Khan.

Given the furor over a few hundred thousand dollars from stormwater to firefighters during budget, what will the outcry be on this one?

And when the next economic downturn becomes so obvious that even local news reports on it, and the opportunity for real capital improvements come to a close, will anyone remember the economics of this deal?

Doubt it.

AG Gancarski mail@folioweekly.com twitter/AGGancarski NOVEMBER 11-17, 2015 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | 5

CELTIC GET-DOWN LANADOO

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Do you ever need a legitimate reason to wear a green derby and get really drunk on stout? NO! This year’s lineup of the annual Celtic festival known as Lanadoo features Highland games, live music by Bay Street (playing the music of Van Morrison), Albannach, The Willis Clan, and The Red Hot Chilli Pipers (pictured, and a clever pun, what?!), tug-o-war tourney, fire truck pull, and kid-geared game zone. Saturday, Nov. 14 and Sunday, Nov. 15 at SeaWalk Pavilion, Jax Beach, $40-$100; for details and to score tickets, lannadoo.com.

OUR PICKS KEEP IT COUNTRY BACKWOODS COUNTRY JAM Though the folks on stage may have traded rhinestone Western shirts for

REASONS TO LEAVE THE HOUSE THIS WEEK

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Henley tees, and you’re just as likely to see a trucker hat as a 10-gallon Stetson, there remain few places more appropriate than an equestrian field to take in some twang-infused reverberations. Featuring Billboard charttoppers Lee Brice (pictured), Maddie & Tae, Cole Taylor, Jared Ashley, and Blaire Hanks performing songs about love, loss, drinking, trucks, and horses (one would assume), from multiple stages at Jacksonville Equestrian Center, the Backwoods Jam proves that, though many of the trappings have changed, much remains sacred in country music. 2-11 p.m. Saturday, Nov. 14, Jacksonville Equestrian Center, 13611 Normandy Blvd., Westside; $35 general admission, backwoodsjam.com.

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NEIGHBORHOOD PARTY

LINCOLNVILLE FESTIVAL There’s nothing better than a good old

community get-together. The 36th annual Lincolnville Festival, featuring live music by local artists including The Housecats, Laurel Lee & The Escapees, Mama Blue, and masterful jazz pianist Doug Carn (pictured), food and drink, vendors, and kids’ activities. 11 a.m.-10 p.m. Saturday, Nov. 14 and 1-6 p.m.

Sunday, Nov. 15 at Willie Galimore Center, Vickers Park, St. Augustine. For details and a full lineup, go to mylincolnville.com.

FRI

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SHAPES OF THINGS JOE SEGAL

Northeast Florida sculptor Joe Segal uses wood and stone to create totem-like objects, which he once described as being inspired by mathematics, sacred geometry, and the phenomenon of naturally occurring forms. Segal’s FRI work evokes both the contemporary and the primitive, splitting the difference to forge new forms. The opening reception is held 7 p.m. Friday, Nov. 13, Florida Mining Gallery, Southside; the exhibit displays through Jan. 15, floridamininggallery.com.

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6 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | NOVEMBER 11-17, 2015

MELLOW GOLD AMERICA Do hard drugs lead to hard rock? And, conversely, do soft drugs lead to soft rock? Far be it for Folio Weekly to advocate the abuse of drugs, but if the latter is true, America are the veritable William S. Burroughs of light rock. Now celebrating their 45th anniversary, in the ’70s these kingpins of mellow music topped the charts with tunes like “A Horse with No Name,” “Ventura Highway,” “Lonely People,” and “Sister Golden Hair.” In recent years, the band, featuring founding members Dewey Bunnell and Gerry Beckley, has recorded with America fans like Ryan Adams and members of My Morning Jacket. 8 p.m. Friday, Nov. 13, Thrasher-Horne Center for the Arts, Orange Park, $43-$89, thcenter.org.

NOVEMBER 11-17, 2015 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | 7

GUEST EDITORIAL JAGCITY

REACHING A COMMON

UNDERSTANDING OF

We’re talking early elementary school education. These teachers aren’t specialists in mathematics; they’re specialists in the development and learning processes for young children.

Give teachers the training they need?

Oh, no, this is the era of Arne Duncan, test and punish policies, and school profiteers. Teacher training is not part of their plan.

So teachers struggle as much as the children in dealing with the “new math.”

AMPHITHEATER OF THE ABSURD

Why a Jags LOSING STREAK is bad for business

COMMON CORE

PARENTAL COMMUNICATION: It’s uncanny how quickly adults catch on to the “Common Core way” of doing arithmetic once it’s explained to them. Most people A Florida MATH TEACHER’s perspective need less than a minute.

Why are parents upset? Like Mary Poppins, when called to account by George A RECENT FLORIDA TIMES-UNION STORY ABOUT Banks for the chaos she set loose, schools elementary math curriculum and the reactions seem to be saying, “I never explain anything to it have prompted me to put out some to anybody.” thoughts about the “Common Core” and why As school professionals, we need to its early education standards and curriculum make communication a key focus. If we are are problematical. There are three basic issues: changing the ways we’re teaching children, developmental appropriateness, teacher we must communicate with parents multiple training, and communication with parents. times in as many ways as possible.

Before I go further, let me disclose that I am Parents support teachers once they a public school math teacher with certification understand what is going on. They’re in middle and high school mathematics. I’m particularly thrilled when we enable them to not a career college of ed graduate; I am in a help their children with learning. We have to second (or third or fourth) career as a teacher. take the time to make that communication, I’ve taught for 10 years, during some of which I which means that school systems need was an instructional coach, tasked with helping to make it a priority and stop burdening other teachers. Currently, I’m back in the teachers with meaningless work that classroom teaching on the high-school level. produces little, if any, results.

Florida teacher ethics require me to disclose that this Guest Editorial is my opinion As a teacher, my three priorities are planning and mine alone. It does not in any way effective and engaging lessons, evaluating represent the beliefs, policies, or positions of student work and providing feedback, and my employer, Duval County Public Schools, or communicating with parents. Everything else, my school, or anyone associated with either. some of which is important, is secondary.

That being said, I do have experience with the struggles of middle-school students and DEVELOPMENTAL APPROPRIATENESS: the mathematics they are asked to learn.

Without parents, we are nothing. We must listen to them with respect. And when an TEACHER TRAINING: I’ve looked at Internet overwhelming number of parents report that their children cry, throw temper tantrums, and social media rants about homework and say, “I hate school,” we need to admit that elementary children are given. What is 43 something has gone wrong. minus 29? What the ranters object to is an When experts in child development, attempt to teach children to think flexibly especially early child development, say about numbers in ways that make sense to that the Common Core is developmentally them. We can solve this subtraction problem inappropriate for early elementary children, by working backwards and adding from 29 to 43. 29 + 1 = 30. 30 + 10 = 40. Add 3 we need to respect their judgment. more and we have 43. How much did we While it’s desirable to have children think add? 14: 1 + 10 + 3. flexibly about numbers, if it’s done too early, it is wrong.

If children are to develop the fluency with arithmetic that they will need to be successful (Long have I argued that we should not in high school math, beginning with Algebra put students into Algebra I before they’re I, they must develop flexibility with numbers. ready. A seventh-grade level 3 FCAT result is What that means is that children must be not the determining factor. Sometimes kids allowed to do arithmetic in ways that make need to go through eighth grade math before sense to them. That solution I outlined in they’re ready for algebra. The state of Florida, the paragraph above? It’s not the only way to with its inflexible policies, used to punish solve the problem. schools for making that decision.)

Developmental appropriateness is crucial.

Thus, the first problem with the new That’s why middle school teachers struggle math (good grief, I’m 58 years old and I was to reengage students who have given up on doing “new math” when I was in elementary school. Those students were forced to undergo school) is that the Internet and social media inappropriate curriculums far too early. posts reflect teachers not granting students As a teacher of secondary mathematics, permission to make sense of numbers any way I can explain elementary math. But I have they can, but are saying to students, “Here’s no expertise in judging the appropriateness the new procedure. Do it exactly this way.” of the age at which students are required to That’s not an indictment of teachers, but do that math. I must and do rely on experts of the rushed way the new standards were put and parents who say the curriculum and into place. Teachers needed time for learning standards are terrible. and adjustment. They weren’t given that time.

It is time for a change.

School superintendents asked for three Gregory Sampson years of transition. States, in particular the state mail@folioweekly.com of Florida, told them to go jump in the lake.

8 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | NOVEMBER 11-17, 2015

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he Jaguars have had, like the other three teams in the division, copious opportunities to stake a claim to compete for the AFC South lead. However, even with every other team in the division below .500, our hometown NFLers don’t seem able to put it together for two consecutive games, which is really the minimum threshold for making a run in the sad sack AFC South.

Sunday’s game in the Meadowlands against the New York Jets was one of those where victory was never completely out of the question … until the bitter end. Even after a first half that, for 29 minutes, exhibited a Jaguars offense that couldn’t get it going, Allen Hurns’ touchdown brought them within four. And earned boos from the crowd, which is a sure sign for any road team that they’re doing well.

The best thing about the first half for the Jaguars: shutting down Chris Ivory. Despite that TD, he had 14 yards in the first 30 minutes.

The second half was full of things that, in isolation, would have been great on highlight reels. The Jets couldn’t put them away, despite the Jags not playing mistake-free football. Part of that was Bortles throwing for almost 400 yards. Part of that was strong defense throughout the game. The Jaguars’ fighting attitude, in some ways, was reminiscent of the 1996 team, the one that’s the ultimate rags-to-riches story in Jacksonville sports history. (Recall they started the year 3-6, and ended up 9-7, in the playoffs courtesy of a missed field goal at the end of the game by ageless Atlanta Falcons kicker Morten Andersen.)

This team has looked like that the last couple of weeks. Flawed, sure. But a lot more swagger than they had earlier in the season.

Even with that said, it might not be enough for this year.

As the Jaguars learn to keep it close, other teams in the division are on their own learning curves.

The Tennessee Titans, with interim coach Mike Mularky who went 2-14 when he was head man here, somehow managed to go to New Orleans and beat the Saints. And the Colts found a way to silence the critics heading into their much-needed bye week after beating Peyton Manning and his Broncos.

If the Colts, up two games already on Jacksonville, return to form after the bye, any slim chances of backdooring into a division title become none.

The other backstory is one of city politics.

With the ambitious stadium improvement bill, now including an amphitheater build-out, being floated as a “public private partnership” (read: yet another revenue stream to benefit Shad Khan), the Jags need some on-fi eld wins.

A lot of home games at the end of the year, and the optics really, in terms of this stadium improvement deal and the six-week legislative cycle, need to be that of the city fully engaged with this franchise.

They need to be closer to .500, at the very least, to avoid the kneejerk “why are we givin’ this man more money for his sorry-ass football team?” narrative. A narrative more easily told when empty seats start to outnumber fans.

The game in Baltimore Sunday was a battle between two teams who, at some point, will start playing out the string. Which one has enough gumption to get a little desperate and make a statement? Your guess: good as mine.

AG Gancarski mail@folioweekly.com twitter/AGGancarski

NEWS

National movement on prisoner workforce re-entry has roots in Jacksonville’s own OPERATION NEW HOPE

BEYOND THE

ABOVE: Bill Carroll, life coach trainer at Ready4Work, is flanked by Toria Jackson (left) and Kamie Shaw (right), two Operation New Hope graduates. AT RIGHT: Kevin Gay and Operation New Hope are preparing to host Operation Reform, a summit for criminal justice reform, on Nov. 18 and 19.

LAST MONDAY, PRESIDENT BARACK OBAMA announced he would “ban the box” on most federal job applications — the box that applicants must check indicating they have a criminal history. Activists who have cultivated the #banthebox meme on social media have long advocated for tossing the screening tool in the early stages of hiring, because it discriminates against ex-offenders who have paid their debt to society.

The president’s action was in response to a criminal justice reform movement that is gaining national bipartisan support — with activists in Jacksonville leading the way.

“When people make a mistake, they need to pay,” says Kevin Gay, president and founder of Jacksonville’s Operation New Hope. But he points out that 95 percent of inmates will come home at some point, most of them with families to support.

“The myth is that they don’t want to work. It’s just not true,” Gay says, throwing out his arms in exasperation. The 57-yearold, who has the unmistakable physique of a runner, infuses his high-energy passion into advocating for nonviolent ex-offenders.

Gay shakes his head as he describes America’s “one-bucket” prison system that disproportionately incarcerates poor and black people, especially black men. A young, African-American man from an impoverished neighborhood has a “slim to none” chance of making it out, he says. But what if that young man gets arrested and goes to prison?

Without help navigating life postincarceration, says Gay, “The slim-to-none scale becomes none.”

Operation New Hope’s Ready4Work initiative, stationed on North Main Street, is a nationally recognized ex-offender job re-entry program. Three presidents have endorsed it.

In 2003, George W. Bush called Gay and local faith leader the Rev. Garland Scott to the White House, and asked them to pilot a public-private partnership for ex-prisoner workforce re-entry. Following the initial implementation, Operation New Hope was rolled out in 16 more U.S. cities, six of which still run successful ex-offender re-entry programs.

The 16-year-old local nonprofit is now preparing to host a summit for the national criminal justice reform movement, Operation Reform, on Nov. 18 and 19 at Hyatt Regency Riverfront, Downtown.

Job re-entry programs are a natural recidivism reducer, Gay says, because when ex-offenders have jobs, they don’t cycle back into the prison system. While the national recidivism rate is 70 percent, ONH’s Ready4Work program boasts a low 15 percent.

And 70 percent of Ready4Work’s graduates keep their jobs through their first year.

Operation New Hope graduates Toria Jackson and Kamie Shaw have already surpassed that statistic. Both recently celebrated their third year of employment with Venus Swimwear, one of Ready4Work’s business partners.

Jackson has moved up in the company and now handles e-commerce. Shaw, likewise, has been promoted to managing the scheduling for Venus executives — executives who say that Jackson and Shaw are indistinguishable from any other employee working there.

“I would have never known that they came through Operation New Hope,” says Venus Swimwear’s Human Resources Manager Whitney Miller, whose time at the company isn’t as long as Jackson’s or Shaw’s. Miller emphasizes that Venus continues to partner with the Ready4Work program because of the thorough training program that they provide to prospective employees — and that they wouldn’t hire ex-offenders without the benefit of Ready4Work’s intense preparation.

Gay, formerly an insurance executive, understands the needs of his 150 employer-partners.

“It’s a question of risk. I want to be able to underwrite everyone who walks through that door,” he says, referring to his ex-prisoner clients. Ready4Work has developed tools for shoring up their clients’ individual “human capital” needs. In addition to undergoing a strict application process and four to six weeks of classes, each client is assigned a life coach and a case manager, and is introduced to resources in the community.

Gay, whose mission started in 1999 as a home-restoration project in Springfield,

BOX

says, “What we realized was that we really needed to be restoring people.”

And restoration is a long road, says Jackson. “Once you get that label — felon — it’s like a scarlet letter.”

“They don’t look beyond the conviction,” Jackson says, of prospective employers. But the people at Operation New Hope, she says, are different.

“They care not only about you but also about your family.” Jackson, age 40, is a divorced mother of three.

Shaw agrees. “We wouldn’t be here today if it weren’t for them. They take the time to really get to know you.” Shaw, 46, is married and has four children.

Jackson recalled one staffer at ONH who was there to talk to her and her peers after class, every day. “She’d come and ask, ‘Is there anything anyone needs to talk about?’”

ONH’s nurturing environment goes beyond the interpersonal relationships, though. Thanks to partnerships with churches and other nonprofits, like Dignity U Wear, ONH provides for some of its clients’ material needs as well.

“If you didn’t have the clothes, they gave them to you,” Shaw says, adding that she liked the professional dress code for classes. “You felt good about yourself.”

“You went in five days a week, just like you would at a job. They took every excuse away: ‘Here’s the bus pass, the clothes’ … they’d even give us lunch.” Shaw, who lived in St. Johns County during R4W training, recalled that she got up at four o’clock every morning to get to North Main Street in time for class.

After Shaw’s first placement as an R4W graduate was lost due to downsizing, she tried, unsuccessfully, to do a job search on her own.

But when she talked to Operation New Hope’s Melissa Riggins, she secured an interview within a week.

“Some of the places where I had the door slammed on me, I got calls from after they got involved,” Shaw says. “I talk to Melissa to this day.”

So does Jackson, three years after graduating from R4W. “She still calls and checks on us. And before she ever hangs up, it’s ‘Do you need anything?’”

The hands-on, personal connection is part of a formula that’s worked for 2,500 exoffenders whom Ready4Work has successfully placed in the workforce.

“All we want to do is give them an opportunity to make their case on why they would do a good job,” Gay says.

“A job is what they’ve always wanted.”

Julie Delegal mail@folioweekly.com NOVEMBER 11-17, 2015 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | 9

10 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | NOVEMBER 11-17, 2015

and off the court. He’s an honors student who conveys a keen awareness of basketball as a business as much an activity. Questions about daily regimens and fun are answered quickly and succinctly. “I wake up early, work out, do chores,” Jared states. Answers carry a slight air of being practiced or canned, but perhaps only because Jared is still just a teen and, like any teen, answers every question with timid brevity. That or he’s sharp enough to know that in the digital age, words have an incredible shelf life — therefore, the less said the better.

This is why Craig is the gatekeeper of all things Jared (he even manages all of his son’s social media). Craig is aware that in this sport, children as young as 9 and 10 years old are shopped around to travel teams, agents and handlers, with hopes of getting their kids noticed by eyes, more often than not, emblazoned with a Swoosh or that weird, threestriped leaf logo that Adidas uses. The action is easy to demonize and condemn, but with futures, egos, and millions of dollars at stake, the value of the right decision becomes clear (or muddled, depending on who is asked).

“If a kid is good, folks are going to come sniffing around early,” states Coach Eric Wesley, a local city league basketball coach, “especially at showcase tournaments, specifically designed for no other reason than to get college coaches to notice kids aligned with the right logo.” Coach Wesley has had a few players poached mid-season by travel team coaches needing to fill a roster spot.

Travel teams cover costs in a variety of ways. Some players pay fees and some do not (read: players with talent). Teams stacked with talented players are subsidized by the shoe companies; the more a team wins, the greater the funds.

“Coaches are tying success to the number of basketball tournaments won and are seeing victories translate into financial gain for their individual pockets. Of course a coach is going to want to stack his team,” adds Coach Wesley.

It is not unheard of for coaches to barter a point guard for, say, a forward if that’s what’s missing from a winning roster.

“You’d be surprised at how small the amounts of money are that these kids are being sold for,” says Craig, shaking his head.

A few weeks ago, Craig tweeted a reference to a Lake Wales high school coach fired for surreptitiously recruiting a young, foreign player, purposely including the words “Human Trafficking” in his post.

“My son is no commodity,” Craig is quick to add, “but my job is to work in the best interest of my children.” His job, he states, is to keep Jared focused on basketball, keep leeches at bay and mitigate the hype.

Yet, according to most, the attention and exposure is the main goal.

“It’s all about the hype,” states Coach Deon Johnson of the Jacksonville Tigers, a local youth basketball travel team that enjoyed a good season this summer. The

CONTINUED NEXT PAGE >>>

At 6-foot-9 inches, Jones looks to be dominant at both ends of the floor.

Coach Deon Johnson of the Jacksonville Tigers, a local youth basketball team, says that parents of young players can be hard to handle.

NOVEMBER 11-17, 2015 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | 11

POTHOLES IN THE

HARDWOOD

<<< FROM PREVIOUS season could have been great, but at the end of last summer, the team’s best player, a local boy, decided to play the 2015 season in Tallahassee for a fully funded Nikesponsored team — a Nike team means no more expenses for shoes, uniforms, airfare, meals and so forth, but it also means that the young player is strictly limited to Nike tournaments and showcases attended strictly by college coaches at schools contractually affiliated with the brand.

“Parents come in with a belief that their child is a top-tier player and look for opportunities to get their kids showcased,” explains Coach Johnson. “Whether the talent truly exists or not is inconsequential.

If Dad believes little 12-year-old, sevenfoot Johnny is star material, Dad is going to want fees waived, guaranteed playing time, secured backroom shoe deals. He knows that the right people will notice because word gets around.”

Craig agrees. Exposure can be quick and fleeting if not taken advantage of. Exposure is what facilitates the end game, which according to Craig, is national recruitment to a Division I school. For that, parents have to deal with the mysterious agent phone calls at all hours of the day and night, the handlers who want Jared to go live in another city, away from his parents, in exchange for a promised full ride to a Division I contender. Finding a missing return address for the envelope full of cash that arrives at the house is also something parents might have to deal with — Craig’s done that twice.

Showcasing a child prodigy can be expensive.

According to Coach Johnson, a good-to-excellent basketball player takes a fund infusion in the $25-$30K range per year.

O

nce a kid starts gaining a bit of national recognition and enters ninth grade, the cast of players gets seedier. The handlers, agents, and travel team coaches, most in the pocket of one shoe company or another, want to align themselves with the future star, claim the discovery and therefore own a piece of their future.

“Parents in tough situations up here in the Northside have plainly told me ‘my son is my ticket out of my situation’ and that’s a ton of pressure for an 11- or 12-year-old,” Coach Wesley begrudgingly admits. “Basketball is hugely popular on Jacksonville’s Northside and parents are caught up in the dream of riches.”

Real estate data on some Jacksonville’s poorest neighborhoods, such as 45th Street and Moncrief, and Ribault, show that the median household income hovers around $26,000 a year, just slightly above the U.S. poverty rate of $23,834. The motivation to push a child to succeed at basketball is evidently present when parents project desires.

“Parents are lost in the perception versus reality,” Coach Wesley continues.

A report by Seth Stephens-Davidowitz featured in The New York Times in late 2013 asserted that growing up in a wealthier neighborhood is a major, positive predictor of reaching the N.B.A. and results pushed back against stereotypical stories of escapes from poverty through basketball. The dream, it seems, is outdated, yet there are still plenty of people with stars lodged in their eyes.

12 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | NOVEMBER 11-17, 2015

It’s not just all of that static. Showcasing a child prodigy can be expensive. According to Coach Johnson, a good-to-excellent basketball player takes a fund infusion in the $25-$30K range per year. Nice for those who have it, but for parents in Northwest Jacksonville, whose child simply wants to play basketball, these numbers are not only impossible, they’re not even real.

What is real is the need for uniforms, socks, food, lodging, airfare, training, college and, of course, sneakers. The two major shoe brands competing for young talent know what they’re going to get if the kid they bet on is a hit. Sure, the Swoosh had to fork over $90 million to sign LeBron in 2003, but in that same year, they netted $4.65 billion.

That dream scenario means that parents will do just about anything to help their

child gain an edge on the competition.

Which is why basketball, once a winter sport, has turned into a year-round endeavor for aspiring athletes. Matthew Brit, also a local city league basketball coach and parent of a young player, says, “Folks aren’t paying attention to the wear and tear on these kids’ bodies. They are still growing and developing physically and getting hurt young can end it all.”

Craig Jones says that year-round basketball is not the main concern for him. It’s putting Jared up against kids who have reclassified.

“That skews the scales of dominance,” he emphatically states.

Reclassification — commonly referred to as “dropping back” — is the practice of parents holding their children back a year academically in order to give them the competitive size

advantage. The practice is so commonly accepted that “unofficial” official guidelines exist on how and when to effectively reclassify the child so that he or she won’t sacrifice college eligibility. The charade is so finely tuned that every action has a precedent.

A

curveball question to Jared Jones about girlfriends may make him stumble for a second, but a quick recovery is no surprise. “Basketball is my main focus right now. I have a lot to work on,” Jared deadpans.

Craig nods and adds, “He needs to work on his ball handling.” For now, Craig is handling the rest.

Josue Cruz mail@folioweekly.com

A&E // FILM

THE PEANUTS MOVIE celebrates the original spirit of its creator

GOOD OLD

CHARLIE BROWN T he Peanuts Movie by Schulz” reads the title card of the new animated feature based on the beloved comic strip — and it feels like there’s a bit of a dare there. On one hand, the creators could argue that it’s literally correct, in that two of the three credited screenwriters are Craig Schulz and Bryan Schulz, the son and grandson of Peanuts cartoonist Charles Schulz. But the implication is that this is a feature to which the creator of Charlie Brown, Snoopy, Lucy, and Linus would give a nod of approval. “This isn’t just a crass capitalization on a familiar brand,” those two additional words tell us. “Sure, it’s 3D CGI animation instead of hand-drawn. But trust us.”

And in a sense, it’s clear from the start that director Steve Martino (Ice Age: Continental Drift) isn’t interested in shaking up the Peanuts universe too radically. These kids still occupy an adult-free world, one where Snoopy still writes novels on a manual typewriter, people still call one another on rotary phones, and children still go outside to play on a snow day. The characters aren’t just frozen at the same grade-school age; they’re frozen in 1965.

That means Charlie Brown (voiced by Noah Schnapp) is still hapless and anxietyridden, and it’s from that foundation that the story emerges. The Little Red-Haired Girl has just moved to town, and Charlie Brown is simultaneously desperate to impress her, and terrified of actually interacting with her.

So he embarks on a series of likely-doomed

THE CONSTANT GARDNER HAVING JUST FINISHED LEE SERVER’S biography Ava Gardner, subtitled Love Is Nothing, I went in search of a film I’d never heard about until I read the book. Not too surprising, since hardly anyone else has seen it. Directed in 1969 by actor Roddy McDowall (his only effort in that capacity), The Ballad of Tam Lin sat on the shelves until 1972, when it appeared very briefly under a number of alternate titles before vanishing from sight and memory.

Even on Internet Movie Database, the Britannica of online film information, it’s identified as The Devil’s Widow, one of the many preposterous titles early distributors tried in order to sell the difficult-to-classify movie to wary ticketbuyers. Few viewers took the bait.

Released on home video two years ago and recently upgraded to Blu-ray, The Ballad of Tam Lin is ripe for rediscovery. It’s not a great film, but it’s an interesting one – especially for fans of Miss Gardner and Ian McShane. The Hollywood screen goddess was 47, McShane in his mid-20s (trim and svelte, a far cry from his appearance as the slovenly, foulmouthed saloon keeper in HBO’s Deadwood).

According to her biographer, Miss Gardner (who hadn’t made a film in two years) was initially distraught when she saw the first day’s rushes, appalled at how old she looked. In reality, she was still very lovely; however, she was surrounded by

endeavors to prove his worth: entering the Melendez’s voice for Snoopy and Woodstock. school talent show, learning to dance so he But there’s no real point to an almost wordcan dazzle at a school event, binge-reading for-word repeat of Lucy’s (Hadley Belle Miller) War and Peace so he can write the most reaction to being licked by Snoopy, or showing erudite book report in third-grade history. the kids dancing the same familiar iconic steps Martino and his Schulz-led writing team — Shermy’s shrug-shuffle, Frieda’s giddy swing bounce deftly among episodic misadventures, — from A Charlie Brown Christmas. This isn’t looking for a tone more in keeping with the a movie that begs for the kind of self-awareness gentle adventure of previous big-screen Peanuts that shows Charlie Brown picking out clothes movies like Race for Your Life, Charlie Brown from a closet filled with nothing but yellow shirts with black zig-zags. and Bon Voyage, Charlie Brown (And Don’t Instead, it’s a movie that really does honor Come Back!) than with the classic holiday TV Schulz’s idea that children have complex specials. That means more time for Snoopy’s interior lives, and his respect for integrity. fantasy confrontations, flying his doghouse Charlie Brown may forever into air battles (dogfights; get it?)

THE PEANUTS MOVIE be getting knocked over on with the Red Baron — trying to the mound by every pitch he rescue poodle pilot Fifi (Kristin ***@ Chenoweth) — and a few more throws, or tangled up in the Rated G extended bumbling chase/action Kite-Eating Tree, but as he says sequences. It may be weird to see Charlie at one point, “Charlie Brown is not a quitter.”

Brown’s squiggly forelock rendered in 3D The plot, loose though it may be, keeps a focus animation, but it does feel like The Peanuts on the notion of Charlie finding himself in his Movie embraces the more relaxed pacing of embarrassing situations because of everything family films from an era before everything had that’s good and decent about him. He’s the to be frantic, loud and madcap. counterpoint to Lucy’s aggressive narcissism, It does seem a bit frustrating, then, that a demonstration of Schulz’s idea that Charlie The Peanuts Movie spends as much time as it Brown wasn’t just a character, but that he had does on its nudging bits of fan service. It’s one character. While The Peanuts Movie succeeds thing to honor the creative team that brought at being amusing and engaging for all ages, it’s previous Peanuts adventures to life by having perhaps just as important that it also succeeds The Little Red-Haired Girl’s family arrive via at being “by Schulz.”

“Mendelson & Melendez Moving,” or use Vince Scott Renshaw Guaraldi’s jazzy piano themes and the late Bill mail@folioweekly.com

MAGIC LANTERNS a much younger cast, many of whom (like Joanna Lumley and Stephanie Beacham) would become staples of British film and television.

The film is based on a ballad by Scottish poet Robert Burns, about a bewitching fairy queen who entraps young Tam Lin in her decadent clutches, his only hope of salvation resting in the love of a pure young maiden. The film transfers the setting from fantasy to England’s swinging ’60s (in its last gasp) where an unspeakably rich Michaela Cazaret (Gardner) holds court in her highland estate over a group of young acolytes of both sexes, plying them with drink and pleasure. Her favorite du jour is Tom Lynn (McShane), who puts his very life in jeopardy when he falls in love with the proverbial rector’s daughter Janet (Beacham). Michaela does not take rejection lightly or lying down.

Expertly photographed by Billy Williams, who would be Oscar-nominated that same year for Ken Russell’s Women in Love, McDowall’s pet project is beautiful to behold, not surprising since he himself was an accomplished photographer. McDowall described the film variously as a valentine to Ava Gardner and a paean to a passing era. The film succeeds on both counts today, though audiences of the day (the very few who saw the movie) really didn’t know what to make of it.

Even today, Tam Lin is difficult to pigeonhole.

For instance, IMDB lists its genre as “horror,”

which it most definitely is not. In obvious frustration, McDowall vowed to never helm another film, so this beautiful curio of another time and place is his directing legacy.

With Ava Gardner still gentle on my mind, I dialed up 1948’s One Touch of Venus, in which the 25-year-old screen goddess plays the Roman goddess of love, whose statue is brought to life after being kissed by a frustrated windowdresser (Robert Walker of Hitchcock’s Strangers on a Train) in a department store.

A delightful bit of fluff based on a successful stage musical, Venus is as much a product of its time as Tam Lin, and great fun in its own right. In her best role since The Killers two years earlier, which launched her career after a series of studio bit parts, Gardner is radiant, playful, and positively divine.

And in her case, there’s no better typecasting.

Pat McLeod mail@folioweekly.com NOVEMBER 11-17, 2015 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | 13

FILM LISTINGS FILM RATINGS

WHITE MEN CAN’T JUMP HE GOT GAME JUWANNA MAN AIRBUD

**** ***@ **@@ *@@@

SCREENINGS AROUND TOWN

SUN-RAY CINEMA Jafar Panahi’s Taxi, The Final Girls, Ghost in the Shell: The New Movie, The Peanuts Movie and The Assassin screen at 1028 Park St., 5 Points, 359-0049, sunraycinema. com. The 75th anniversary of Fantasia is observed Nov. 17.

THE CORAZON CINEMA & CAFÉ Testament of Youth and Cop Car screen at 36 Granada St., St. Augustine, 679-5736, corazoncinemaandcafe.com. Gone with the Wind, noon Nov. 12. Southpaw and Mr. Holmes start Nov. 13.

IMAX THEATER Rocky Mountain Express, Living in the Age of Airplanes, Spectre, Galapagos 3D and Humpback Whales screen at World Golf Village Hall of Fame IMAX Theater, St. Johns, 940-4133, worldgolfimax.com.

NOW SHOWING

BIG STONE GAP Rated PG-13 There’s rom-com in them thar hills. Small-town shenanigans include Ashley Judd, Whoopi Goldberg, Jane Krakowski, Chris Sarandon, Jenna Elfman, Jasmine Guy, Patrick Wilson and Anthony LaPaglia.

BRIDGE OF SPIES **@@ Rated PG-13 For director Steven Spielberg and leading man Tom Hanks, the problems are pacing and story structure. It’s tedious, meandering and repetitious, seemingly insistent on driving home points we already know. Story structure is the bigger flaw. The script

by Matt Charman and Joel and Ethan Coen is divided like a theatrical production. Beginning in 1957, the first and more interesting segment follows insurance lawyer Jim Donovan (Hanks) as he defends accused Russian spy Rudolf Abel (Mark Rylance) from charges of treason and espionage. Jim is an insurance counselor doing a defense attorney’s job – this is based on a true story. Jim’s legal partners (Alan Alda, John Rue), the CIA, FBI, the presiding judge (Dakin Matthews) and Jim’s wife Mary (Amy Ryan), daughters and son want it all to be for show and for Rudolf to not receive a fair trial. Jim stands by his client’s constitutional rights and does his best for the Russian. — Dan Hudak BURNT Rated R Bradley Cooper plays a self-absorbed chef whose rockstar behavior destroyed his cooking career,

so he’s moved to London to start over. Costars Sienna Miller, Emma Thompson and Uma Thurman.

– and not necessarily as a sociopolitical statement – it’s an emotional drama. — D.H.

CRIMSON PEAK **@@ Rated PG-13 In this gothic horror pic from writer/director Guillermo del Toro, a little girl is warned by a ghost to “beware of Crimson Peak.” Ten years on, the same ghost appears to the girl, Edith (Mia Wasikowska), to remind her to “beware of Crimson Peak.” If I were Edith, there’s no way in hell you’d ever get me around anything remotely resembling anything like a peak, or anything even hinting at crimson, ever. She ignores the warning, marrying a man who operates a red clay mining company, and lives with him in a creepy mansion where red clay is mined. Costars Tom Hiddleston, Jessica Chastain and Charlie Hunnam. — D.H.

GOOSEBUMPS Rated PG Jack Black returns in this timely spooky-but-not-too-spooky romp based on R.L. Stine’s books. Costars Dylan Minnette, Odeya Rush and Ryan Lee. Stine himself sneaks in for a bit, too.

FREEHELD ***@ Rated PG-13 Detective Laurel Hester (Moore) is a valuable member of the Ocean City, New Jersey Police Department. Her partner Dane (Michael Shannon) is a womanizer, but cares for Laurel. Laurel’s a lesbian; after a cute meet with Stacie (Ellen Page), they fall in love, buy a house together, get a dog, etc. They’re as settled as any married couple can be, but it’s 2002 and gay marriage is not yet legal. This is pertinent when Laurel is diagnosed with terminal lung cancer, and the local government says her pension cannot be passed on to Stacie. Without that pension, Stacie will lose their home after Laurel dies. On its own terms

JEM & THE HOLOGRAMS Rated PG A global megasuperstar and her sisters take stock of their meteoric rise and try to keep their feet on the ground while apparently reaching for the stars. Costars Aubrey Peeples, Stefanie Scott, Aurora Perrineau, Hayley Kiyoko, Molly Ringwald (I guess to lend it some much-needed authenticity), and Juliette Lewis (to lend it some much-needed sleeze).

LOVE THE COOPERS Rated PG-13 The holiday season is stressful enough as it is, what with trying to find the perfect gift for someone you don’t give a rat’s ass about … here the idyllic celebration the Cooper family strives for is a chaotic charade, until surprising things begin to happen.

Costars Olivia Wilde, Amanda Seyfried, Marisa Tomei, Diane I’m-always-in-my-Annie-Hall-mode Keaton, John Goodman, Anthony Mackie, Ed Helms, and the incomparable Alan Arkin, who was so great opposite John Cusack in High Fidelity.

THE MARTIAN **** Rated PG-13 This is great storytelling, great visuals, solid performances. While exploring the surface of Mars, scientists are caught in a violent storm.

Melissa (Jessica Chastain), Rick (Michael Pena), Beth (Kata Mara), Chris (Sebastian Stan) and Alex (Aksel Hennie) escape on their shuttle, but Mark (Matt Damon) is hit with debris, presumed dead and left behind. But he’s alive, unable to communicate with NASA, and low on oxygen, food and supplies. It’ll be four years before the next mission to Mars.

Mark doesn’t panic. He uses his background as a botanist to grow food on a planet on which nothing grows naturally, and even creates his own water. His intelligence, ingenuity and inspiration are a joy to watch. — D.H. OUR BRAND IS CRISIS Rated R Sandra Bullock at her least likable: brash, bossy and blonde. She’s a political fixer sent to South America to jump-start a new government. Costars Billy Bob Thornton and Anthony Mackie.

PAN Rated PG The versatile Hugh Jackman is back, this time as the dread pirate Blackbeard. Garrett Hedlund is Hook, Levi Miller is the stubborn manchild Peter, Rooney Mara is Tiger Lily and Adeel Akhtar is Sam Smiegel, aka Smee.

THE PEANUTS MOVIE ***@ Rated G Reviewed in this issue.

ROCK THE KASBAH *G@@ Rated R Bill Murray plays never-was music manager Richie Lanz, who claims he discovered Madonna but hasn’t been attached to a star in years. Desperate, he books his receptionist/singer Ronnie (an underused Zooey Deschanel) on a USO Tour of Afghanistan. Chaos ensues after they land in Kabul, and soon a mercenary (Bruce Willis) helps Ronnie steal Richie’s passport and money to get the first flight home. Richie enlists help of munitions dealers Jake (Scott Caan) and Nick (Danny McBride), which gets him into more trouble. Richie meets prostitute Merci (Kate Hudson), who takes advantage of him in more ways than one. Will American audiences invest in Murray’s scumbag shyster, and a Muslim teenager facing oppression American women have never felt? — D.H. SCOUTS GUIDE TO THE ZOMBIE APOCALYPSE Rated R Zombies are going to a town where three Scouts are camping out. Can the guys save their burg from flesh-eating creatures? Are you kidding? Costars Tye Sheridan, Logan Miller, and Joey Morgan.

SPECTRE **@@ Rated PG-13 The action movie – fourth in the reinvigorated-for-the-21st-century James Bond franchise – begins with the secret agent and a lady friend navigating the crowds of raucous Day of the Dead revelers in Mexico City, through streets heaving with partiers, into a fancy hotel (where the party continues), up to a room. They’re dressed for the mock morbid mood, gloomy yet merry, and we catch that “fun”-ereal contagion. And then it progresses to authentically thrilling – Bond leaps out the hotel window and across rooftops to do a Secret Agent Thing. But the thin plot never catches fire. After the events of Skyfall, Bond (Daniel Craig) went rogue, chasing a big bad guy around the globe, while back in London, the new M (Ralph Fiennes) fights with C (Andrew Scott), who’s about to launch a new blanket electronic surveillance scheme to replace the Double Zed program: something about drone warfare being more efficient than spies with a licence to kill. Costars Christoph Waltz, Léa Seydoux and Monica Bellucci. — MaryAnn Johanson STEVE JOBS Rated R Michael Fassbender stars as the genius visionary who changed the world. Costars Kate Winslet, Seth Rogen and Jeff Daniels.

SUFFRAGETTE *G@@ Rated PG-13 Reviewed in this issue.

THE 33 Rated PG-13 Based on the actual 2010 event, when a South American gold and copper mine collapsed, trapping 33 miners in its gullet for 69 days. Costars Antonio Banderas, Rodrigo Santoro, James Brolin, Lou Diamond Phillips, and Juliete Binoche.

WOODLAWN Rated PG Haven’t we seen this already? An athletically blessed high schooler plays football like a dream, but reality hits as hard as the opposing linebackers when racism gets in the mix. Costars Caleb Castille, Sean Astin, Jon Voight and Harry Alexander.

14 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | NOVEMBER 11-17, 2015

NOVEMBER 11-17, 2015 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | 15

A&E // FILM

OUIET

RIOT

F

Sadly, the new period drama is a weak presentation of the FEMINIST MOVEMENT’S crucial earliest days

eventually, will be rewarded for their actions. ilms such as Suffragette should make us This sends a message to future groups — think about how far we’ve come socially, whether we agree with them or not — to also and encourage us to make sure we’re not commit violent acts of protest, because if it making similar mistakes from the past in the worked for one cause, it can/should work for present. But what Suffragette should be and what it actually is could not be more different, another. It’s a dangerous precedent to set. and the result is an insufferable frustration of That said, Maud is the biggest issue of a movie. all in Suffragette. There’s nothing about her In 1912 London, Maud (Carey Mulligan), personality early on that suggests she’s a loving wife to Sonny (Ben Whishaw) and fighter. Accordingly, she hesitates to become a mother to George (Adam Michael Dodd), suffragette, even after going to a few meetings. hates her job as a laundress. Society demands She’s clearly not that into it. Yet she keeps she be submissive to the men in her world, going, and the more she goes, the more she and views her as a second-class citizen at a loses both personally and professionally. time when the men are nothing to brag about.

We’re supposed to sympathize with her Violet (Anne-Marie Duff ), a co-worker, situation, but as bad things keep happening, and later Edith (Helena Bonham Carter), a we can’t help but question why she continues chemist, invite Maud to suffragette doing something to which she’s meetings, where she learns of the not wholly committed. How unfair struggle women have faced SUFFRAGETTE could director Sarah Gavron and to receive the right to vote. For screenwriter Abi Morgan (The *G@@ 50 years, they’ve been peacefully Iron Lady) not give their main Rated PG-13 petitioning, to no avail. Now more character a motive? At one point, militant actions are needed, says Maud says she wants equal rights suffragette leader Emmeline Pankhurst (Meryl and mentions not receiving equal pay, which Streep, who’s only in one scene but is still on is much more ambitious than just the right to the film’s poster). Slowly, and to the chagrin vote. She never mentions these things again. of Sonny and every other man in the movie Speaking of which: If you’re going to make except Edith’s husband (Finbar Lynch), Maud a movie about women wanting the right to becomes involved in the cause. vote, allow at least one woman to express One must question the suffragettes’ actions. why the right to vote is important to her.

They’re resorting to violence — throwing rocks This should be obvious: If these characters through windows, blowing up mailboxes, etc., are sacrificing their families, jobs and always while others are not around so no one livelihood for this cause, a smidge of character gets hurt, but their point is made. Because development explaining why they give a damn the right thing to do is obvious and we agree about it is in order. with their cause, as viewers we’re inclined to What a misfire Suffragette is. The women root for the heroines and think it’s OK to blow who sacrificed everything to get pig-headed stuff up. And granted, they have few other men to view them as intelligent and worthwhile recourses because they’ve always been ignored. human beings deserve much better.

But think about this objectively: They’re in Dan Hudak an organization that believes in a cause and, mail@folioweekly.com

16 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | NOVEMBER 11-17, 2015

A&E //ARTS Second annual author fest features 24 LOCAL WRITERS representing Jacksonville’s vibrant literary scene

THE

STUFF WRITE

Jax by Jax organizer Tim Gilmore (left); featured authors (top row) Heather Peters, Michaela Tashijan, Hurley Winkler; (bottom row) Andres Rojas, Sohrab Homi Francis and Matt Lany

N

ow in its second year, Jax by Jax is looking to up the literary game in Jacksonville by featuring two dozen local writers in 12 venues across Riverside including Paperwhite Salon, Riverside Liquors, Silver Cow Watering Hole and Sunday Tattoo Gallery to name a few. Folio Weekly caught up with the event’s organizer, author and professor Tim Gilmore, who also pens the FW literary column Let There Be Lit, to learn a bit more about Jax

by Jax’s evolution and if Jacksonville really is sophisticated enough to pull off such an event. Among others, fellow writers including Matthew Lany, Jordan Logue, Johnny Masiulewicz, Tiffany Melanson and Emily K. Michael will join Gilmore for Jax by Jax’s second annual festivities.

Folio Weekly: Tell me a bit about how the idea for Jax by Jax came about.

Tim Gilmore: Jax by Jax began in the summer of 2014, when I asked several of my colleagues, friends, and fellow writers to help me consider how we might put on an event that demonstrated to Jacksonville that this city has a strong literary voice. An event that, if Jacksonville chose to listen, would knock it off its feet. Several other people in town were already thinking similar thoughts.

Yours may be better, though, it seems to me.

Anyway, a city writes itself into being. You can’t have lived in Brooklyn 160 years ago, but you can live it now through Walt Whitman. If you want to know Dublin a century ago, you go to James Joyce. Joyce wrote of Dublin from afar most of his life, and he both hated his hometown and loved it. Now it’s hard to walk two blocks in the center of Dublin and not see signs, art or bookstores promoting the city’s writers. Dublin’s now an official UNESCO “City of Literature.” If you want in the year 2015, or the year 2075, to know Jacksonville, you should know the city’s writers.

How many writers are featured this year?

The final number is 24 writers, 12 venues. Each writer’s performance lasts about 15 minutes, which allows attendees to chat afterwards among themselves or with writers, or to walk next door to the next venue. Each venue hosts two writers who alternate performances each half-hour.

And how were these writers chosen?

A small number of committee members — including FSCJ professors, local publishers, literary impresarios, and writers — met to discuss Jax by Jax 2015 applications. They considered JAX BY JAX 2015 personal biography and sample How did last year’s event go?

3-7 p.m. Nov. 14 at various writing that focused on local We put the first Jax by Jax venues at Park and King themes or topics, and evidence together in about three months, streets in Riverside. For details, go to jaxbyjax.com. of literary strength and growth. soliciting writers we knew and The focus on Jacksonville as a independent businesses around setting or theme isn’t an exclusive requirement, the axis of Park and King streets in Riverside but a guiding principle. All told, we received as venues. I’d initially thought of hosting Jax more than 60 applications.

by Jax downtown in the coffin factory beside the Jacksonville Historical Society’s archives, Do you feel that local writers are but that possibility presented some logistical underappreciated or that it’s not widely known nightmares, and none of us had organized large that Northeast Florida has such a budding events before. Jo Carlisle, professor of English writing scene? at FSCJ and my wife, proposed the idea of If you’d asked me this question five years ago, using independent businesses as venues and I’d have said yes. But Bridge Eight Literary rotating writers. So we decided on Riverside as Magazine, Perversion Magazine, Jax by Jax, and a large and vibrant community near the center of town, and Park and King streets as a healthy so many other writers’ entities have changed nexus at the geographical heart of Riverside the equation. And besides those, the city’s and Avondale. writers have climbed over a tipping point.

The question I hear you ask is this one: “Is The tagline of the event is “Jacksonville Jacksonville a sophisticated-enough town to appreciate its writers?” If you come out to Jax Writing Jacksonville.” What does that

by Jax, you’ll vote yes. mean to you?

Kara Pound Actually, the tagline is “Jacksonville Writers mail@folioweekly.com Writing Jacksonville,” so the name’s a chiasmus.

NOVEMBER 11-17, 2015 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | 17

ARTS ARTS ++ EVENTS EVENTS PERFORMANCE

FREUD’S LAST SESSION Mark St. Germain’s play, about the doctor and a young C.S. Lewis, is staged 8 p.m. Nov. 13 and 14 and 2 p.m. Nov. 15 at Amelia Community Theatre’s Studio 209, 207/209 Cedar St., Fernandina Beach, 261-6749, $20; $10 students; through Nov. 21, ameliacommunitytheatre.org.

CIRQUE DREAMS HOLIDAZE The acrobatic troupe performs its acclaimed holiday extravaganza, 7:30 p.m. Nov. 17 at Times-Union Center’s Moran Theater, 300 Water St., Downtown, 442-2929, $39.50-$70, artistseriesjax.org.

THE WHALE The 5 & Dime presents Samuel D. Hunter’s dark comedy, about adolescence, religion, death, friendship, LGBT issues, and family, 8 p.m. Nov. 13 and 14 and 2 p.m. Nov. 15 at Episcopal Church of the Good Shepherd, 1100 Stockton St., Riverside; through Nov. 22, $20, the5anddime.org.

PLAZA SUITE River City Players present Neil Simon’s comedy about three couples in a New York hotel, 7 p.m. Nov. 11-14 and 2 p.m. Nov. 15 at Scarlett-Hill Theatre, Larimar Arts Center, 216 Reid St., Palatka; ticket info at 377-5044.

A BEHANDING IN SPOKANE Players by the Sea’s dark comedy about a one-handed man seeking the missing hand, 8 p.m. Nov. 12-14; 2 p.m. Nov. 15 at 106 Sixth St. N., Jax Beach, 249-0289, $23; $20 seniors/military/students; language may be offensive,; ages 16+; through Nov. 21, playersbythesea.org.

BLACK PEARL SINGS! Atlantic Beach Experimental Theatre presents a musical set in 1935, about a white song collector and an African-American woman, 8 p.m. Nov. 13 and 14 and 2 p.m. Nov. 15 at Adele Grage Cultural Center, 716 Ocean Blvd., $20, 249-7177, abettheatre.com.

THE CHRISTIANS Limelight Theatre’s faith-based drama, 7:30 p.m. Nov. 12-14; 2 p.m. Nov. 15 at 11 Old Mission Ave., St. Augustine, 825-1164, $26; $24 seniors, $20 military/students, limelight-theatre.org.

ALWAYS A BRIDESMAID Theatre Jacksonville’s comedy about friends who vow to attend each other’s weddings, 7:30 p.m.

Nov. 12, 8 p.m. Nov. 13 and 14, 2 p.m. Nov. 15 at 2032 San Marco Blvd., 396-4425, $25; $20 seniors/military/students; through Nov. 22; theatrejax.com.

ANYTHING GOES Alhambra Theatre & Dining’s musical comedy of antics on an ocean liner, set to Cole Porter’s words and music, through Nov. 22; 12000 Beach Blvd., Southside, $38-$59 plus tax, 641-1212, alhambrajax.com.

INSANE WITH POWER Orange Park Community Theatre’s superhero-themed comedy, 8 p.m. Nov. 13 and 14; 3 p.m. Nov. 15 at 2900 Moody Ave., 276-2599, $18; through Nov. 22, opct.org.

CLIFFORD THE BIG RED LIVE! The crimson canine in a childgeared stage production, 2 and 5 p.m. Nov. 15 at Florida Theatre, 128 E. Forsyth St., 355-2787, $20-$50, floridatheatre.com.

CLASSICAL, CHOIR & JAZZ

SYMPHONY IN 60 Jacksonville Symphony Orchestra offers Rachmaninoff Symphonic Dances, 6 p.m. Nov. 11, T-U Center’s Jacoby Symphony Hall, 300 Water St., Downtown, 354-5547, $35, jaxsymphony.org.

JAKE SHIMABUKURO Ukulele great performs, 8 p.m. Nov. 13, Ponte Vedra Concert Hall, 1050 A1A N., 209-0399, $34.50$44.50, pvconcerthall.com.

AVANT GARDE MUSIC JU Percussion Ensemble and University Singers premiere Tony Steve’s And There I Was On Corfu, plus Cage and Roldna’s works, 7:30 p.m. Nov. 13, Jacksonville University’s Terry Hall, 256-7386, arts.ju.edu.

ORANGE PARK CHORALE The community chorus sings, 7:30 p.m. Nov. 13, Grace Episcopal Church, 245 Kingsley Ave. and 3 p.m. Nov. 15, Hendricks Avenue Baptist Church, 4001 Hendricks Ave., San Marco, orangeparkchorale.com.

SYMPHONIC DANCES Courtney Lewis conducts violinist Arnaud Sussman and Jacksonville Symphony Orchestra in Symphonic Dances, works by Stravinsky, Prokofiev, and Rachmaninoff, 8 p.m. Nov. 13 and 14, T-U Center’s Jacoby Symphony Hall, 354-5547, $25-$74, jaxsymphony.org.

SINGING FOR OUR SENIORS Woodlawn Presbyterian Bell Choir, Bethlehem Lutheran Choir, Philippian Community Church Mass Choir, Fil-Millenial Dancers, Leonard Cross, and Edward Waters College Concert Choir, 6 p.m. Nov. 14, Florida Theatre, 128 E. Forsyth St., 355-2787, $35-$50, floridatheatre.com.

OPERATIC WORKS First Coast Opera performs Opera Paris, by Verdi and Puccini, 7:30 p.m. Nov. 14, Lightner Museum, 75 King St., St. Augustine, 824-2874, firstcoastopera.com.

KRISTIN CHENOWETH Tony-winning actress/singer Chenoweth performs with Jacksonville Children’s Chorus, 8 p.m. Nov. 14, Moran Theater, 633-6110, $35-$95, ticketmaster.com.

IVAN RUTHERFORD JU Wind Ensemble and Broadway singer Rutherford perform 7:30 p.m. Nov. 15, JU’s Terry Concert Hall, 256-7386, $10; $5 seniors/military/students, arts.ju.edu.

MINNEAPOLIS GUITAR QUARTET The acclaimed group plays, 2 p.m. Nov. 15, Flagler College’s Lewis Auditorium, 14 Granada St., St. Augustine, 797-2800, $30, emmaconcerts.com.

VOICE AND VIOLIN Soprano Rachel Hanauer, violinist Emily Knowles, and pianist Jackson Merill play works by Bach, Vivaldi, and Holst, 5 p.m. Nov. 15, St. John’s Cathedral, 256 E. Church St., Downtown, 356-5507, jaxcathedral.org.

STRAIGHT NO CHASER Ten-man vocal group, 8 p.m. Nov. 17, Florida Theatre, 355-2787, $36.50-$56.50, floridatheatre.com.

AMERICAN NATIONAL OPERA COMPANY The group performs Tosca, 7:30 p.m. Nov. 17 and Othello, 7:30 p.m. Nov. 18, T-U Center’s Moran Theater, 633-6110.

JU FACULTY TRIO Violinist Marguerite Richardson, cellist Shannon Lockwood, and pianist Scott Watkins play Beethoven and Mendelssohn, 7:30 p.m. Nov. 17, Terry Concert Hall, 256-7386, $10; $5 seniors/military/students, arts.ju.edu.

TRUMPETER Allen Vizzutti, UNF Wind Symphony and Jazz Ensemble 1, 7:30 p.m. Nov. 18, UNF’s Lazzara Hall, 1 UNF Dr., Southside, 620-2878, unf.edu/coas/music/calendar.aspx.

COMEDY

HYPNOTIST RICH GUZZI Standup comic/master hypnotist, 8 p.m. Nov. 13 and 14, $15-$18; “adult”-themed show, 10 p.m.,

18 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | NOVEMBER 11-17, 2015

$20-$25, The Comedy Zone, 3130 Hartley Rd., Mandarin, 292-4242, comedyzone.com.

NICK DiPAOLO Edgy comic and panelist on Tough Crowd with Colin Quinn, 8 p.m. Nov. 12, 8 and 10:30 p.m. Nov. 13 and 14, The Comedy Club of Jacksonville, 11000 Beach Blvd., 646-4277, $15-$25, jacksonvillecomedy.com.

GABRIEL IGLESIAS The comedian’s Comedy Central special had 15 million viewers; 8 p.m. Nov. 13, The Florida Theatre, 355-2787, $39-$119, floridatheatre.com.

TIM KIDD Funnyman Kidd is on 7:30 p.m. Nov. 13 and 14, Latitude 360, 10370 Philips Hwy., Southside, 365-5555, $15, latitude360.com/jacksonville-fl.

CALLS & WORKSHOPS

MUSICAL THEATER JAZZ CLASS Jocelyn Geronimo holds classes, 4-5 p.m. every Wed., through Dec. 9, Players by the Sea, Jax Beach, 249-0289, $200, gary@playersbythesea.org.

ARTS IN THE PARK ENTRIES Limited, juried April event at Atlantic Beach’s Johansen Park seeks applications; coab.us.

ART WALKS & MARKETS

WEDNESDAY MARKET Produce, arts, crafts, food, live music, 8 a.m.-12:30 p.m. Nov. 11, St. Johns Pier Park, 350 A1A Beach Blvd., St. Augustine Beach, 347-8007, thecivicassociation.org.

COMMUNITY FARMERS & ART MARKET Art, crafts, jewelry, 4-7 p.m. Nov. 11, 4300 St. Johns Ave., Riverside, 607-9935.

DOWNTOWN FRIDAY MARKET Arts/crafts, local produce, 10 a.m.-2 p.m. Nov. 13, Jacksonville Landing, 353-1188.

RIVERSIDE ARTS MARKET Local/regional art, food, farmers’ row, 9 a.m.-4 p.m. – Brent Byrd & Suitcase Gypsies, Navy Band Southeast Pride, The Rip Currents 10:30 a.m. Nov. 14 – every Sat. under Fuller Warren Bridge, 715 Riverside Ave., free admission, 389-2449, riversideartsmarket.com.

MUSEUMS

AMELIA ISLAND MUSEUM OF HISTORY 233 S. Third St., Fernandina Beach, 261-7378, ameliamuseum.org. It Came from the Attic: Local War Memorabilia Collections, through November.

BEACHES MUSEUM & HISTORY PARK 381 Beach Blvd., Jax Beach, 241-5657, beachesmuseum.org. Naval Station Mayport: Guardian of the Southern Frontier Exhibit through Feb. 12.

CUMMER MUSEUM OF ART & GARDENS 829 Riverside Ave., 356-6857, cummermuseum.org. David Hayes: The Sentinel Series, with sculptures of geometrically abstract, organic forms, displays through Oct. 2, 2016. Women, Art & Social Change: The Newcomb Pottery Enterprise, 20th-century ceramics, through Jan. 2. British Watercolors through Nov. 29.

KARPELES MANUSCRIPT MUSEUM 101 W. First St., Springfield, 356-2992. New works by Mac Truque, through Jan. 2. An opening reception is 5-8 p.m. Nov. 20. Baseball: Origins and Early History, through December.

MUSEUM OF CONTEMPORARY ART JACKSONVILLE 333 N. Laura St., 366-6911, mocajacksonville.com. Project Atrium: Ian Johnston, Johnston’s Fish Tales, themes of consumption and material waste, displays Nov. 14-Feb. 28. Avery Lawrence: Live in Jacksonville, through Nov. 22. Smoke and Mirrors: Sculpture & The Imaginary, 3D and installation works by sculptors Chul Hyun Ahn, James Clar, Patrick Jacobs, Ken Matsubara, Daniel Rozin, and Kathleen Vance, through Jan. 24. Unmasked: Art with a Heart in Healthcare, through Dec. 6.

THE RITZ THEATRE & MUSEUM 829 N. Davis St., 807-2010, ritzjacksonville.com. Black Wings: American Dreams of Flight is on display through Jan. 17.

GALLERIES

ALEXANDER BREST GALLERY Jacksonville University, 2800 N. University Blvd., 256-7371, ju.edu. Opening reception for Annual Student Juried Exhibition, 5-7 p.m. Nov. 12; exhibits through Dec. 11.

ARCHWAY GALLERY & FRAMING 363 Atlantic Blvd., Atlantic Beach, 249-2222, archwaygalleryandframing.com. Latitude 360 Degrees, by Jax Artist Guild members, through mid-November.

THE ART CENTER COOPERATIVE Jacksonville Landing, Ste. 139, 2 Independent Dr., 233-9252, tacjacksonville.org. The Wildlife Jury Show, through Dec. 28.

BREW FIVE POINTS 1024 Park St., Riverside, 374-5789, brewfivepoints.com. Opening reception for Humans: Sculptures & Drawings by Chip Southworth, 6-10 p.m. Nov. 12.

BUTTERFIELD GARAGE ART GALLERY 137 King St., St. Augustine, 825-4577, butterfieldgarage.com. New works by Jim Rivers, Mary Jane Amato, and Mary Bower, through Dec. 1.

CRISP-ELLERT ART MUSEUM 48 Sevilla St., St. Augustine, 826-8530, flagler.edu/news-events/crisp-ellert-art-museum.

Edgar Endress: Finding Baroque (terre florida), through Nov. 28.

CULTURAL CENTER AT PONTE VEDRA BEACH 50 Executive Way, 280-0614, ccpvb.org. New works by Enzo Torcoletti and The Jacksonville Watercolor Society’s Fall Show Exhibit display through Nov. 20.

FIRST STREET GALLERY 216-B First St., Neptune Beach, 2416928. 15th annual Christmas Open House, through Dec. 24.

FLORIDA MINING GALLERY 5300 Shad Road, Southside, 535-7252, floridamininggallery.com. Opening reception for Joe Segal – Permutations, 7 p.m. Nov. 13.

FSCJ DEERWOOD CENTER CAMPUS 9911 Old Baymeadows Rd., 997-2500, fscj.edu. Mind, Body, Soul & Spirit – A Celebration of the Arts, student-made mandalas, through Dec. 4.

FSCJ KENT CAMPUS GALLERY 3939 Roosevelt Blvd., 646-2300, fscj.edu. Works by Morrison Pierce and Loren Myhre, through Nov. 17.

FSCJ NORTH CAMPUS GALLERY 4501 Capper Rd., 632-3310, fscj.edu. Inside Out , through Dec. 4.

HASKELL GALLERY JIA, 741-3546, jiaarts.org. Face Forward, self-portraits by Adrian Pickett, Bill Yates, Chip Southworth, Christie Holechek, Daniel Wynn, David Engdahl, Doug Eng, Dustin Harewood, Enzo Torcoletti, Franklin Ratliff, Hiromi Moneyhun, Jason John, Jim Benedict, Jim Draper, John Bunker, Kevin Arthur, Larry Wilson, Laurie Hitzig, Louise Freshman Brown, Mary St. Germain, Mindy Hawkins, Overstreet Ducasse, Paul Ladnier, Robin Shepherd, Sara Pedigo, Shaun Thurston, Steve Williams, Susan Ober, Thony Aiuppy, Tony Wood, through Dec. 28.

Northeast Florida artist Chip Southworth is no stranger to Folio Weekly readers. Under the guise of Keith Haring’s Ghost and beneath a veil of secrecy, Southworth created pieces throughout town that were playfully agitprop and had the intent to draw attention to the city’s lack of public art. Under his own name, Southworth is a highly skilled portrait and figurative artist; his new exhibit Humans: Sculptures & Drawings by Chip Southworth also includes 3-D pieces. The opening reception is 6-10 p.m. Thursday, Nov. 12 at BREW Five Points, Riverside; the exhibit displays through late December, brewfivepoints.com.

HAWTHORN SALON 1011 Park St., Riverside, 619-3092, hawthornsalon.com. Lily Kuonen’s Playntings [Un]Covered through Nov. 21.

J. JOHNSON GALLERY 177 Fourth Ave. N., Jax Beach, 435-3200, jjohnsongallery.com. Opening reception for Water Angels, Christina Hope’s underwater photography, 6-8 p.m. Nov. 13; exhibits through Jan. 21.

LUFRANO INTERCULTURAL GALLERY 620-2475, unf.edu/ gallery. Lida, Paintings by Franklin Matthews, through Dec. 11.

MONYA ROWE GALLERY 4 Rohde Ave., St. Augustine, 217-0637, monyarowegallery.com. Out of Place, by Larissa Bates, Natasha Bowdoin, Vera Iliatova, Giordanne Salley, Dasha Shiskin, through Dec. 20.

SPACE:EIGHT 228 W. King St., St. Augustine, 829-2838, spaceeight.com. Extended Playbook, by George Long, Jessica Caldas, Mario Schambon, William Downs, Adrian Barzaga, Mike Stasny, Erin Michelle Vaiskauckas, through Dec. 3.

STELLERS GALLERY AT PONTE VEDRA 240 A1A N., Ste. 13, 273-6065, stellersgallery.com. Landscape: Realism to Abstraction,

by Henry Von Genk III, Ellen Diamond, John Schuyler, through Dec. UNF GALLERY OF ART Founders Hall, 620-2534, unf.edu/ gallery. UNF Faculty Exhibition, through Dec. 11.

EVENTS

RETRO HOLIDAY COCKTAIL TASTING Café Nola and Premiere Beverage hold a tasting, 6-8 p.m. Nov. 12, MOCA Jacksonville, 333 N. Laura St., Downtown, $30, 366-6911, mocajacksonville.com.

AMERICA RECYCLES DAY Recycling/shred event is 11 a.m.-5 p.m. Nov. 13 at Kmart, 500 Atlantic Blvd., Neptune Beach and noon-5 p.m. Nov. 13, Osborn Convention Center, 1000 Water St., Downtown, 630-3420.

PETANQUE ANNUAL OPEN The seventh annual Open, with more than 120 two-player teams, is Nov. 13-15 at Fernandina Beach’s downtown marina; petanque-america-open.net.

HUNGER FIGHT THANKSGIVING EVENT The second annual Thanksgiving Community Outreach lets folks pack meals for local food pantries, mission homes, and backpack programs, 8-10 a.m., 11:30 a.m.-1:30 p.m., and 3-5 p.m. Nov. 14, Osborn Convention Center, 1000 Water St., Downtown, $85; group and sponsorship rates available, to register, go to hungerfight.org.

LINCOLNVILLE FESTIVAL The 36th annual event has live music, food, drink, arts & crafts, kids’ activities, 11 a.m.-10 p.m. Nov. 14 and 1-6 p.m. Nov. 15 at 399 Riberia St., St. Augustine. For more info and a full lineup, go to mylincolnville.com.

LANADOO Annual Celtic festival has Highland games, live music, tug-o-war tourney, fire truck pull, kid-geared game zone, Nov. 14 and 15, SeaWalk Pavilion, Jax Beach, $40-$100; lannadoo.com.

JAX BY JAX The second annual literary event of readings and meet-and-greets with local authors – Fred Dale, Monica DePaul, Tangela Floyd, Sohrab Fracis, Liz Gibson, Tim Gilmore, Matthew Lany, Jordan Logue, Johnny Masiulewicz, Tiffany Melanson, Emily K. Michael, Carol O’Dell, G.M. Palmer, Marcus Pactor, Heather Peters, H.K. Rainey, Raleigh Rand, Andres Rojas, Michaela Tashjian, Jeff Whipple, April Gray Wilder, Hurley Winkler – at 12 venues, 3-7 p.m., Park and King streets; jaxbyjax.com.

HUMANITIES IN MEDICINE SYMPOSIUM Richard Blanco (U.S. inaugural poet), Sue Austin (artistic director, co-founder of Freewheeling), and Hope McMath (Cummer Museum director), discuss transforming perceptions in healthcare through the humanities, Nov. 15 Mayo Clinic and Nov. 16 Cummer Museum.

To register, go to ce.mayo.edu/node/4346.

NURSING HOME FLEA MARKET SALE River Garden Nursing Home Auxiliary presents a flea market, 9 a.m.-4 p.m. Nov. 15 at 4578 San Jose Blvd., Lakewood. Treasures include lamps, TVs, toys, books, linens, kitchen items and more; cash only. Proceeds benefit the home’s residents; 260-1818, rivergarden.org.

RIVER HOUSE AUTHOR LUNCHEON St. Augustine author Mary Golly discusses her book, Plane Life: Highs and Lows, 11:30 a.m.-1:30 p.m. Nov. 17, 179 Marine St., $15; reservations 209-3655.

EMPTY BOWLS LUNCHEON 31st annual event has a light lunch by local celebrities, live music by students, noon-1 p.m. Nov. 17, Osborn Convention Center, Downtown. Folks select one ceramic bowl from hundreds handcrafted by volunteers as a keepsake; additional bowls are $10. Professional artists’ specialty bowls available; $30, 730-8239, lssjax.org.

A&E // MUSIC

A pair of virtuoso pickers bring some SERIOUS LICKS to Ponte Vedra Concert Hall

WOOD WIRE & T

Lindley tours as a soloist and, he Vox Bill Wyman Bass Guitar is at times, with various percussionists a hollow-bodied, tear-dropped, twoincluding Wally Ingram and Hani Naser. pickup shipwreck from the 1960s. One These duo shows spawned a score of releases of the earliest “signature model” instruments that jump genre and seamlessly blend world (Wyman is the retired Stones bassist), which elements that should be nowhere near one infest music catalogs everywhere these days. another. Take for example the laconic “Cat Food Largely forgotten as a collector’s piece, it Sandwiches.” Sung in Lindley’s garish falsetto, was brought back to life in the ’90s by string it’s a vaudevillian take on backstage food that master David Lindley. Well, sort of revived, putrefies in the green room or in the artist’s in that Lindley converted the instrument to a tummy. A straight 12-bar blues over a pulsating working model bouzouki. reggae thump, embellished by some tasty hulaNo, not an Asian comic, the bouzouki is blues slide guitar on a 1920s-era Weissenborn in fact an eight-string longneck Greek cousin Hawaiian guitar. You get the picture. to the bluegrass mandolin. Think Zorba the If all this wasn’t enough, you have the Greek for your reference point. chance to see Lindley at Ponte Vedra Concert Multi-instrumentalist is too tame a Hall on Nov. 12, where he shares description for Lindley’s gig. the stage with another wry soul Since his beginnings as Topanga ADRIAN LEGG and with chops to burn, Adrian Canyon Banjo Champion four DAVID LINDLEY Legg. Legg is technician in years running and the prescient 8 p.m. Nov. 12, Ponte Vedra every sense of the word. Before eclecticism of Kaleidoscope (best Concert Hall, $39.50$49.50, pvconcerthall.com he made the stage his home, described as Delta blues goes to he worked in R&D for such Damascus with a layover in the musical gear firms as Trace Eliot, Marshall Balkans) c. 1967-’68, Lindley’s been the go-to Amplification, and Ovation Guitars, all the guy for sessions, film score work, and loading a while perfecting a unique fingerstyle approach host of unpronounceable instruments for the that has won praise from heavies like Steve road. If in the touring bands of Crosby & Nash, Vai and Joe Satriani, with whom he toured James Taylor, Dylan, Dolly, etc., you catch the as the guitar super group, G3. Vai calls Legg Syrian Oud, Turkish Saz, or Armenian Cumbus “the best acoustic guitarist I’ve ever heard.” onstage, you’ll find Lindley. He may be best Legg is irresistible in concert for both his known for his long association with Jackson superb playing and his famous wit. He spent Browne, from the multimillion-album singera few years as a reporter-at-large for NPR’s songwriter’s debut to present-day records. The All Things Considered, roaming America and searing lap steel guitar solo of Browne’s ’77 distilling his experiences on any number classic “Running on Empty” is Lindley at his topics, from our obsession with mobility to effortless best. If you happen to own the vinyl, the neglect of the genius of 20th-century you know the photo of Lindley warming up on composer Paul Hindemith. (look it up). fiddle that graces the inside sleeve.

I, for one, can only imagine the backstage Lindley has said he has no idea how back-and-forth between Lindley and Legg. many instruments he owns and, unusual for So somebody needs only poke their head in a guitarist, he’s not fussy over names, dates, or serial numbers. Anything from Sears, the door and yell “CAPO!” or “ALTERED Roebuck to the pawnshop will do if it feels TUNING!” and see what happens. right. As the old saying goes, “the good guitar Arvid Smith finds you.” Check out any of the videos from mail@folioweekly.com Lindley’s ’80s seminal band, the El Rayo-X, to watch licks pour forth from a cheap Asian knock-off to a triple-tiered Fender steel simultaneously. As a collector, Lindley does go beyond the call. When he has the time, he’s known for scouting estate sales, searching for old furniture, doors, and fixtures for the aged mahogany or spruce they may give up. With the rain forest depleted, new instrument wood has to come from somewhere.

NOVEMBER 11-17, 2015 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | 19

A&E // MUSIC

CEREBRAL STYLEY

I

SOLILLAQUISTS OF SOUND bring a heady approach and smart focus to the hip-hop scene

more edgy and experimental. ’m apprehensive when a group Though S.O.S. has never is presented as “spanning or abated the social commentary transcending genres.” To me that’s become the hallmark of that reads, “lacking a focused their lyrics and a cornerstone sound with disjointed offerings.” of their energy, the messages The unfortunate thing is, my on these two albums are more cynicism is often proved correct. overt than the last installment So when I started researching of their trilogy, The 4th Wall, Solillaquists of Sound (S.O.S.) Part 1 and Part 2. Perhaps and that type of “transcending they’ve just gotten that much genres” terminology was better at artfully weaving the persistently used, my hopes message in crafting these songs, allowing a user were dampened. At their very core, they are to deconstruct and decipher a little more for a hip-hop group … a really good hip-hop themselves … the art being the vessel, not the group. You’ll read about them as being a band other way around. that references funk, soul, rock, jazz, dance, The 4th Wall, Part 1 and Part 2 is a double electronic, bluegrass, contemporary Latin, album that was released independently in polka … OK, I threw in the last three, but you 2014. It’s definitely the group’s magnum opus get my point.

— not just in size, but for its exploration, its It’s a disservice to categorize S.O.S. as abundance of sound and melding of innovation anything but an inventive and deliberate hipand influence. The entire trilogy is quality and hop group that values varied instrumentation worth exploring, but and influence. It’s also you can definitely hear a disservice to hip-hop SOLILLAQUISTS OF SOUND, growth in each new as a genre, but that’s BLUEPRINT, DUMBTRON, E-TURN, offering culminating in neither here nor there.

GRAMMAR TREE, GRAYSKUL what is their best work.

As far as comparisons, 8 p.m. Nov. 17, 1904 Music Hall, Downtown, “This Is Your Day,” the they’re like a more $15 advance; $18 day of, 1904musichall.com second track on Part raucous version of 1, shows them really The Roots. It’s fun, it’s making good on my Roots comparison. It’s expansive, and it’s substantive with a range of a powerful blend of traditional hip-hop and impressive instrumentation. distortion-fueled rock elements that create S.O.S. formed in 2002 in Orlando when an anthemic track. “Here I Am,” from Part Asaan Brooks (Swamburger) and Glen Valencia 2, features the extremely talented Blueprint Jr. (DiViNCi) met and began recording. They (from Columbus, Ohio, founder of Weightless brought in poet Tonya Combs, and Alexandrah Recordings and one-half of Soul Position with Sarton, with whom Swamburger had previously RJD2). They’re able to give his cerebral, indie collaborated in Chicago. Their first effort, 4 hip-hop chops a Southern-fueled foundation Student Counsol, was released on Nonsense that results in my favorite song on the album.

Records, an Orlando-based label. They were Their album artwork, website, and able to attract the attention of Sage Francis, who videos utilize a comic book-style aesthetic, called them after listening to their demo. This an interesting way to underscore the group resulted in the quartet touring with him as both his opening act and back-up band. They were members’ divergent physical characteristics. then signed to ANTI-/Epitaph. While on that Or perhaps it’s a touch of the hero complex label, the group released the first two parts of which social change-style musicians what they call their “listeners trilogy.” As If We sometimes see themselves. Or maybe they’re Existed was released in 2006, followed by No simply comic book nerds. It just makes you More Heroes in 2009. Both albums are enjoyable like them that much more.

Brenton Crozier journeys and harken back more to the mail@folioweekly.com commonly cited Fugees influence, but are far

20 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | NOVEMBER 11-17, 2015

“Play some Dead!” EMILY KINNEY, best known for her role as Beth Greene on AMC’s The Walking Dead, performs with JACOB JEFFRIES at Jack Rabbits on Nov. 18 in San Marco.

LIVE + LOCAL MUSIC CONCERTS THIS WEEK

SPADE McQUADE 6 p.m. Nov. 11 at Fionn MacCool’s Irish Pub, Jacksonville Landing, Ste. 176, Downtown, 374-1247.

RYAN CRARY 6 p.m. Nov. 11 & 18 at Pusser’s Bar & Grille, 816 A1A N., Ponte Vedra Beach, 280-7766.

DENNY BLUE 6 p.m. Nov. 11 & 18 at Paula’s Beachside Grill, 6896 A1A S., Crescent Beach, 471-3463.

KNUCKLE PUCK, SEAWAY, SORORITY NOISE, HEAD NORTH 6 p.m. Nov. 11, 1904 Music Hall, 19 Ocean St., Downtown, $14.

TEXAS IN JULY, REFLECTIONS, TO THE WIND, INVENT, ANIMATE 6 p.m. Nov. 11 at Underbelly, 113 E. Bay St., Downtown, 353-6067, $15.

Songwriter Showcase: ELAINE MAHON, MADISON CARR, TOM EDWARDS, PETE LOFTIS, ROBIN, MATT SOERGEL 7:30 p.m. Nov. 11 at Mudville Music Room, 3104 Atlantic Blvd., San Marco, 352-7008, $10.

SLOW MAGIC 8 p.m. Nov. 11 at The Original Café Eleven, 501 A1A Beach Blvd., St. Augustine Beach, 460-9311, $13 advance; $15 at the door.

KOFFIN KATS 8 p.m. Nov. 11 at Burro Bar, 100 E. Adams St., Downtown.

AARON KOERNER 6 p.m. Nov. 12, Pusser’s Bar & Grille.

GRACE PETTIS, BETTY SOO 7:30 p.m. Nov. 12, Mudville Music Room, $10.

The BAND BE EASY 8 p.m. Nov. 12 at Latitude 360, 10370 Philips Hwy., Southside, 365-5555.

BLENDED BREW, EMMA MOSELEY BAND, MY FIRST CIRCUS 8 p.m. Nov. 12 at Jack Rabbits, 1528 Hendricks Ave., San Marco, 398-7496, $5 advance; $10 day of.

ADRIAN LEGG, DAVID LINDLEY 8 p.m. Nov. 12 at Ponte Vedra Concert Hall, 1050 A1A N., $39.50-$49.50.

CHASE BRYANT 6 p.m. Nov. 12 at Mavericks Live, 2 Independent Dr., Downtown, 356-1110, $15.

EMERY, RED JUMPSUIT APPARATUS, FOREVERMORE, HEARTS LIKE LIONS 6 p.m. Nov. 12, 1904 Music Hall, $18.

GRACE & TONY 10 p.m. Nov. 12 at Mojo Kitchen, 1500 Beach Blvd., Jax Beach, 247-6636, $15.

GYPSY STAR, REBECCA ZAPEN 7:30 p.m. Nov. 13, Mudville Music Room, $10.

AMERICA 8 p.m. Nov. 13 at Thrasher-Horne Center for the Arts, 283 College Dr., Orange Park, 276-6750, $43-$89.

CODY NIX 8 p.m. Nov. 13, Pusser’s Bar & Grille.

TURKUAZ, THE FRITZ 8 p.m. Nov. 13 at Freebird Live, 200 N. First St., Jax Beach, 246-2473, $10 advance; $15 day of.

JEREMIAH DALY & the HOMESTEAD, LUKE MARTIN BAND 8 p.m. Nov. 13, Jack Rabbits, $10 advance; $13 day of.

Piuspalooza: TELEPATHIC LINES, ALLIGATOR, QUEEN BEEF, The RESONANTS, BROWN PALACE, SCAVUZZOS 8 p.m. Nov. 13 at Shanghai Nobby’s, 10 Anastasia Blvd., St. Augustine, 547-2188.

JAY GARRETT 9 p.m. Nov. 13 at Mr. Chubby’s Wings, 11043 Crystal Springs Rd., Westside, 355-9464.

EVAN MICHAEL & the WELL WISHERS 10 p.m. Nov. 13 & 14, Flying Iguana, 207 Atlantic Blvd., Neptune Beach, 853-5680.

CIRCLE OF INFLUENCE 10 p.m. Nov. 13 & 14 at The Roadhouse, 231 Blanding Blvd., Orange Park, 264-0611.

Riverside Arts Market: BRENT BYRD & the SUITCASE GYPSIES, NAVY BAND SOUTHEAST PRIDE, THE RIP CURRENTS 10:30 a.m. Nov. 14, 715 Riverside Ave., 389-2449.

Lanadoo: The RED HOT CHILLI PIPERS, The WILLIS CLAN, ALBANNACH, BAY STREET, others Nov. 14 & Nov. 15, SeaWalk Pavilion, Jax Beach, $40-$100; lannadoo.com.

Lincolnville Festival: DOUG CARN, The HOUSECATS, LAUREL LEE & the ESCAPEES, MAMA BLUE, others Nov. 14 & 15, Willie Galimore Center, Vickers Park, St. Augustine, mylincolnville.com.

Salt Marsh Brewgrass Festival: GRANDPA’S COUGH MEDICINE, The APPLEBUTTER EXPRESS, The FIREWATER TENT REVIVAL 2-8 p.m. Nov. 14, North Florida Land Trust Talbot House, Big Talbot Island, 12134 Houston Ave., Northside, $35; tickets at saltmarshbrewgrass.eventbrite.com.

RANDY ROGERS BAND, WADE BOWEN 6 p.m. Nov. 14, Mavericks Live, $15.

MELISSA SMITH 8 p.m. Nov. 14, Pusser’s Bar & Grille.

AURORA, LE ORCHID, JORDAN POOLE, ETHAN PARKER BAND 8 p.m. Nov. 14, Freebird Live, $8 advance; $10 day of.

TEEN DIVORCE, The DOG APOLLO, WEEKEND ATLAS, INTERVENTION 8 p.m. Nov. 14, Jack Rabbits, $5 advance; $10 day of.

CANDLEBOX (Acoustic) 8 p.m. Nov. 15, Ponte Vedra Concert Hall, $29.50-$39.50.

JAMES McMURTRY, ARVID SMITH 8 p.m. Nov. 15, Jack Rabbits, $15.

SOLILLAQUISTS of SOUND, BLUEPRINT, DUMBTRON, E-TURN, GRAMMAR TREE, GRAYSKUL 8 p.m. Nov. 17, 1904 Music Hall, $15 advance; $18 day of.

CAUSTIC CASANOVA, FLAG on FIRE, MOYAMOYA, ANTHONY & the SECOND VERSE 8 p.m. Nov. 17, Jack Rabbits, $5 advance; $10 day of.

EMILY KINNEY, JACOB JEFFRIES 8 p.m. Nov. 18, Jack Rabbits, $15 advance; $20 day of.

CHEW, COSMIC GROOVE 8 p.m. Nov. 18, Shanghai Nobby’s.

UPCOMING CONCERTS

KATIE GRACE HELOW ALBUM RELEASE, MERE WOODARD, JESSE MONTOYA Nov. 19, Barnett Bank Building The DIRTY DOZEN BRASS BAND, NEW BREED BRASS BAND Nov. 21, Ritz Theatre & Museum SWAMP RADIO EARLY THANKS Nov. 21, St. Augustine Amphitheatre THE SWORD Nov. 21, Freebird Live This is Not a Test Tour: TOBYMAC, BRITT NICOLE, COLTON DIXON, HOLLYN Nov. 22, Veterans Memorial Arena SCOTT BRADLEE’S Postmodern Jukebox Nov. 28, Florida Theatre The HIP HOP NUTCRACKER Nov. 29, Ritz Theatre & Museum RONNIE MILSAP Nov. 29, The Florida Theatre LA-A, BLEAK Nov. 30, Shantytown Pub DAVE KOZ CHRISTMAS TOUR Dec. 1, The Florida Theatre MAC MILLER, EARTHGANG, MICHAEL CHRISTMAS, REMEMBER MUSIC Dec. 2, The Florida Theatre EDDIE IZZARD Dec. 3, Florida Theatre LUCERO Dec. 3, Ponte Vedra Concert Hall BRIAN WILSON, AL JARDINE Dec. 5, Florida Theatre NICHOLAS PAYTON Dec. 5, Ritz Theatre & Museum Big Ticket: TWENTY ONE PILOTS, OF MONSTERS & MEN, WALK the MOON, The NEIGHBOURHOOD, GLASS ANIMALS, ANDREW McMAHON, MUTEMATH, PVRIS, ROBERT DeLONG, COLEMAN HELL, BORNS, BOOTS on BOOTS Dec. 6, Metropolitan Park KANSAS Dec. 6, The Florida Theatre D.R.I. Dec. 9, Harbor Tavern LOUDON WAINWRIGHT III, MELISSA FERRICK Dec. 11, Ponte Vedra Concert Hall

NOVEMBER 11-17, 2015 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | 21

LIVE + LOCAL MUSIC Self-described Tennessee “punkgrass” duo GRACE & TONY perform at Mojo Kitchen on Nov. 12 in Jax Beach.

TRANS-SIBERIAN ORCHESTRA Dec. 11, Vets Memorial Arena KEVIN GRIFFIN Dec. 12, Ponte Vedra Concert Hall BRIAN REGAN Dec. 13, The Florida Theatre RISING APPALACHIA Dec. 13, Ponte Vedra Concert Hall LEON RUSSELL Dec. 17, Ponte Vedra Concert Hall BOWZER’S Rock ’N’ Roll Holiday Party: The TOKENS, FREDDY BOOM BOOM CANNON Dec. 17, Florida Theatre MATISYAHU Dec. 18 & 19, Ponte Vedra Concert Hall MICHAEL McDONALD Dec. 19, Thrasher-Horne Center AN IRISH CHRISTMAS Dec. 21, T-U Center The TEN TENORS Dec. 22, The Florida Theatre CHRIS DUARTE Dec. 22, Mudville Music Room BUTCH TRUCKS & the FREIGHT TRAIN BAND Dec. 27, Ponte Vedra Concert Hall DONNA the BUFFALO Dec. 30, Ponte Vedra Concert Hall SOJA Jan. 1, The Florida Theatre JOHN SEBASTIAN Jan. 8, Ponte Vedra Concert Hall STEVE FORBERT TRIO Jan. 9, Mudville Music Room SILVERSUN PICKUPS Jan. 10, Ponte Vedra Concert Hall The OLATE DOGS Jan. 11, Ponte Vedra Concert Hall

YO YO MA Jan. 14, Amelia Island Chamber Music Festival TROMBONE SHORTY & ORLEANS AVENUE Jan. 15, PVC Hall Winter Jam: FOR KING & COUNTRY, MATTHEW WEST, CROWDER, LAUREN DAIGLE, RED, NEWSONG, SIDEWALK PROPHETS, TEDASHIL, KB, STARS GO DIM, TONY NOLAN, WE ARE MESSENGERS Jan. 15, Veterans Memorial Arena The TEMPTATIONS, The FOUR TOPS Jan. 21, Florida Theatre JESCO WHITE, SNAKE BLOOD REMEDY, GRANDPA’S COUGH MEDICINE Jan. 23, Jack Rabbits ANA POPOVIC Jan. 28, Ponte Vedra Concert Hall CARRIE UNDERWOOD Jan. 30, Veterans Memorial Arena GAELIC STORM Jan. 30, Ponte Vedra Concert Hall JOHNNY MATHIS Jan. 31, Florida Theatre COLIN HAY Jan. 31, Ponte Vedra Concert Hall 2CELLOS Feb. 2, The Florida Theatre YANNI Feb. 3, T-U Center Southern Soul Assembly: JJ GREY, ANDERS OSBORNE, MARC BROUSSARD, LUTHER DICKINSON Feb. 4, Florida Theatre YONDER MOUNTAIN STRING BAND, TROUT STEAK REVIVAL Feb. 9, Ponte Vedra Concert Hall

ALAN PARSONS PROJECT Greatest Hits Tour, Jacksonville Symphony Orchestra Feb. 10, Florida Theatre ROBERT RANDOLPH & the FAMILY BAND Feb. 11, Ponte Vedra Concert Hall PATTY GRIFFIN, SARA WATKINS, ANAIS MITCHELL Feb. 13, Florida Theatre The JAMES HUNTER SIX Feb. 13, Ponte Vedra Concert Hall FOREIGNER Feb. 20, Florida Theatre SUN RA ARKESTRA Feb. 20, Ritz Theatre ADAM TRENT Feb. 21, Florida Theatre GARY CLARK JR. Feb. 21, Ponte Vedra Concert Hall VINCE GILL, LYLE LOVETT Feb. 25, The Florida Theatre Experience Hendrix: BILLY COX, BUDDY GUY, ZAKK WYLDE, KENNY WAYNE SHEPHERD, JONNY LANG, DWEEZIL ZAPPA, KEB MO, ERIC JOHNSON, CHRIS LAYTON, MATO NANJI, NOAH HUNT, HENRI BROWN Feb. 26, Florida Theatre IL VOLO March 3, The Florida Theatre BLACK VIOLIN March 3, Ritz Theatre ROGER McGUINN March 4, Ponte Vedra Concert Hall HERB ALPERT & LANI HALL March 4, The Florida Theatre JASON ISBELL, SHOVELS & ROPE March 5, St. Augustine Amphitheatre JANET JACKSON March 8, Veterans Memorial Arena MERLE HAGGARD March 11, Florida Theatre MOODY BLUES March 11, St. Augustine Amphitheatre GET the LED OUT March 17, Florida Theatre JOHNNY CLEGG & HIS BAND March 18, PV Concert Hall JOE SATRIANI March 19, The Florida Theatre The FAB FOUR: The ULTIMATE TRIBUTE March 19, PVC Hall CECILE McLORIN SALVANT March 31, Ritz Theatre NAJEE April 9, Ritz Theatre & Museum LET IT BE: Celebration of The Beatles April 10, Florida Theatre AMY HELM April 12, Ponte Vedra Concert Hall WANEE MUSIC FESTIVAL April 14, 15 & 16 The BRONX WANDERERS April 16, Florida Theatre One Night of Queen: GARY MULLEN & the WORKS April 20, Ponte Vedra Concert Hall A NIGHT with JANIS JOPLIN April 21, The Florida Theatre ELLIS PAUL May 13, The Original Café Eleven 5 SECONDS OF SUMMER July 20, Veterans Memorial Arena

LIVE MUSIC CLUBS

AMELIA ISLAND, FERNANDINA

GREEN TURTLE TAVERN, 14 S. Third St., 321-2324 Buck Smith Thur. Yancy Clegg Sun. Vinyl Record Nite every Tue.

AVONDALE, ORTEGA

CASBAH CAFÉ, 3628 St. Johns Ave., 981-9966 Goliath Flores every Wed. Live jazz every Sun. Live music every Mon. ECLIPSE, 4219 St. Johns Ave. KJ Free 9 p.m. every Tue. & Thur. Indie dance 9 p.m. every Wed. ’80s & ’90s dance at 9 p.m. every Fri. MELLOW MUSHROOM, 3611 St. Johns, 388-0200 RadioLove 9 p.m. Nov. 12. Live music every weekend

THE BEACHES

(All venues in Jax Beach unless otherwise noted)

CULHANE’S, 967 Atlantic Blvd., Atlantic Beach, 249-9595 Kissass Karaoke every Fri. DJ Hal every Sat. Irish music every Sun. FLYING IGUANA, 207 Atlantic Blvd., Neptune Beach, 853-5680 Evan Michael & the Well Wishers 10 p.m. Nov. 13 & 14 FREEBIRD LIVE, 200 N. First St., 246-2473 Turkuaz, The Fritz 8 p.m. Nov. 13. Aurora CD release party, Le Orchid, Jordan Poole, Ethan Parker Band Nov. 14. Passafire Nov. 20 HARMONIOUS MONKS, 320 First St. N., 372-0815 Scholars Word 8 p.m. Nov. 13. Hellzapoppin Circus Sideshow Revue Nov. 14. Live music every Fri. & Sat. Dan Evans, Spade McQuade every Sun. Back From the Brink every Mon. LYNCH’S IRISH PUB, 514 N. First St., 249-5181 Chillula 10 p.m. Nov. 13. Love the Sin 10 p.m. Nov. 14 MELLOW MUSHROOM, 1018 Third St. N., 241-5600 Live music most weekends MEZZA Restaurant & Bar, 110 First St., NB, 249-5573 Gypsies Ginger every Wed. Mike Shackelford & Steve Shanholtzer every Thur.

MOJO KITCHEN, 1500 Beach Blvd., 247-6636 Grace & Tony 10 p.m. Nov. 12 NIPPERS BEACH GRILLE, 2309 Beach Blvd., 247-3300 DiCarlo Thompson Nov. 12. Live music most weekends RAGTIME TAVERN, 207 Atlantic Blvd., AB, 241-7877 Jimmy Parrish Nov. 11. Christopher Dean Band Nov. 12.

Boogie Freaks Nov. 13. Sidewalk 65 Nov. 14. Billy Bowers Nov. 18. Live music every weekend ROYAL PALM VILLAGE WINE & TAPAS, 296 Royal Palms Dr., A.B., 372-0052 Billy Bowers 7 p.m. Nov. 12 WIPEOUTS GRILL, 1589 Atlantic Blvd., Neptune Beach, 247-4508 Live music Nov. 12 & 13

DOWNTOWN

1904 MUSIC HALL, 19 Ocean St. N. Knuckle Puck, Seaway, Sorority Noise, Head North Nov. 11. Emery, Red Jumpsuit Apparatus, Forevermore, Hearts Like Lions Nov. 12. The Red Jumpsuit Apparatus, Emery Nov. 13. Brummy Brothers, Pilotwave Nov. 15. Willie Evans Jr., Blueprint, Solillaquists of Sound, Blueprint, Dumbtron, E-Turn, Grammar Tree, Grayskul 8 p.m. Nov. 17

22 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | NOVEMBER 11-17, 2015

LIVE + LOCAL MUSIC BURRO BAR, 100 E. Adams St. Koffin Kats 8 p.m. Nov. 11.

Winter, Allison Weiss, Mal Blum, Kid in the Attic Nov. 13 DOS GATOS, 123 E. Forsyth St., 354-0666 BlackJack every Wed. DJ Brandon every Thur. DJs spin dance music every Fri. DJ NickFresh every Sat. DJ Randall 9 p.m. every Mon. DJ Hollywood every Tue. FIONN MacCOOL’S, Jax Landing, Ste. 176, 374-1247 Spade McQuade Nov. 11 & 18. The Daygos 8 p.m.-mid.

Nov. 13. Jimmy Solari 8 p.m.-mid. Nov. 14. Chuck Nash 8 p.m.-mid. Nov. 20 JACKSONVILLE LANDING, 2 Independent Dr., 353-1188 Ivey West Band 6-10 p.m. Nov. 12. 7th Street Band 8 p.m.-1 a.m. Nov. 13. DJ Kevin 2-5 p.m., Grimm White Steed 5-9 p.m. Nov. 15 MARK’S DOWNTOWN, 315 E. Bay St., 355-5099 DJ Dr. Doom 10 p.m.-2 a.m. every Fri. DJ Shotgun 10 p.m.-2 a.m. every Sat. MAVERICKS LIVE, Jax Landing, 356-1110 Chase Bryant 6 p.m. Nov. 12. Kevin Gates 6 p.m. Nov. 13.

Randy Rogers, Wade Bowen 6 p.m. Nov. 14. Dallas Smith, Keith Anderson 6 p.m. Nov. 19. Joe Buck, DJ Justin every Thur.-Sat. UNDERBELLY, 113 E. Bay St., 699-8186 Texas in July, Reflections, To The Wind, Invent, Animate Nov. 11.

Whitechapel, Psycroptic, Culture Killer Nov. 14

FLEMING ISLAND

WHITEY’S FISH CAMP, 2032 C.R. 220, 269-4198 The Remains 9 p.m. Nov. 13 & 14. Live music 9 p.m. every Fri. & Sat. DJ Throwback every Thur. Deck music every Fri., Sat. & Sun.

INTRACOASTAL WEST

CLIFF’S BAR & GRILL, 3033 Monument Rd., 645-5162 Bill Ricci Nov. 13. Live music most weekends JERRY’S Sports Grille, 13170 Atlantic Blvd., 220-6766 Retro Katz Nov. 13. Live music most weekends

MANDARIN, JULINGTON

DAVE’S MUSIC BAR & GRILL, 9965 San Jose, 575-4935 Blues Jam Nov. 13. Lisa & the Mad Hatters Nov. 14. Live music most weekends HARMONIOUS MONKS, 10550 Old St. Augustine Rd., 880-3040 Open jam 7 p.m. every Mon.

ORANGE PARK, MIDDLEBURG

CLUB RETRO, 1241 Blanding Blvd., 579-4731 ’70s & ’80s dance 8 p.m. every Fri. & Sat. DJ Capone every Wed. THE HILLTOP, 2030 Wells Rd., 272-5959 John Michael every Tue.-Sat.

ANGEL OF THE ODD

NEARLY TWO YEARS AGO, THE EDITORS OF THIS esteemed publication invited me to submit a weekly column. “You can write about anything you want,” is what they said.

Hard to turn that down, right?

The challenge I issued myself when I accepted the offer was to shun the third person and write from a strictly personal point of view, and to dig into more obscure material when I could. I also dedicated space every month or so to traveling back in time and remembering my favorite locally released albums. In service of that goal, right out of the gate, I re-reviewed Crawfish of Love’s Septober Octember. The truly bizarre album combined a Tom Waits approach to poetry-song, while getting all psyched out about out-there topics like spilled Slurpees and Opie eating a gazelle. In celebration of my approaching two-year anniversary, I’m going to dig up another Crawfish of Love release, 2008’s Darkest Show on Earth (available via Global Recording Artists at gragroup.com/crawfi sh.html).

The brainspawn of weirdo songwriter and educator Dave Roberts, Crawfish had a long history of breaking up after every show. Though part inside joke, the band really would split after each performance, sometimes staging elaborate arguments in the process. File that, and the rest of this “band’s” antics, under performance art.

But this very public display of intra-band drama could sometimes overshadow the true art within.

And if Septober Octember didn’t speak loudly enough about this folk-art ensemble’s worthiness, Darkest Show on Earth certainly did. The “12 Oddities & Curios” (i.e., the songs) herein chart the emotional trajectories of the denizens of a traveling

Salt Marsh Brewgrass Festival features performances

by GRANDPA’S COUGH MEDICINE, THE APPLEBUTTER EXPRESS (pictured), and THE FIREWATER TENT REVIVAL at Big Talbot Island Nov. 14.

THE ROADHOUSE, 231 Blanding Blvd., 264-0611 Circle of Influence 10 p.m. Nov. 13 & 14. Live music 10 p.m. every Wed. DJ Big Mike 10 p.m. every Thur.

PONTE VEDRA

PUSSER’S Grill, 816 A1A, 280-7766 Ryan Crary Nov. 11 & 18. Aaron Koerner Nov. 12. Cody Nix Nov. 13. Melissa Smith Nov. 14. Richard Smith 6-10 p.m. Nov. 19 TABLE 1, 330 A1A, 280-5515 Dan Coady Nov. 11. Gary Starling Nov. 12. Ryan Crary & Johnny Flood Nov. 13. Jamie Noel Nov. 14. Robbie Lit Nov. 18

RIVERSIDE, WESTSIDE

ACROSS THE STREET, 948 Edgewood Ave. S., 683-4182 Stokin’ the Neighbors Nov. 11. Live music most weekends MR. CHUBBY’S WINGS, 11043 Crystal Springs Rd., 355-9464 Jay Garrett Nov. 13 MURRAY HILL THEATRE, 932 Edgewood S., 388-7807 Deana Carter, J Collins Nov. 12. Boo Deezy & Friends Nov. 13. Decyfer Down, We Are Vessel, With Every Wind Nov. 14 RIVERSIDE ARTS MARKET, 715 Riverside Ave., 389-2449 Brent Byrd & the Suitcase Gypsies, Navy Band Southeast Pride, The Rip Currents Nov. 14

ST. AUGUSTINE

CAFE ELEVEN, 501 A1A Beach Blvd., St. Augustine Beach, 460-9311 Slow Magic 8 p.m. Nov. 11 CELLAR UPSTAIRS, 157 King St., 826-1594 Vinny Jacobs 1 p.m. Nov. 15 MILL TOP TAVERN, 19 St. George St., 829-2329 Redfish Rich 1 p.m. Nov. 12. Ancient City Keepers 9 p.m. Nov. 13 & 14. John Winters 1 p.m. Nov. 15 PAULA’S GRILL, 6896 A1A S., Crescent Beach, 471-3463 Denny Blue open mic jam 6-9 p.m. Nov. 11 & 18 SHANGHAI NOBBY’S, 10 Anastasia Blvd., 547-2188 Piuspalooza: Telepathic Lines, Alligator, Queen Beef, The

carnie midway. Opening with “Carnival En-Trance” and closing with the troublingly named “Corndog Wind,” the CD is one of the most disturbing local releases (nay, national releases) I’ve had the morbid pleasure of hearing.

Nearly entirely acoustic folk-rock (there are many electric instruments employed here, but the overwhelming feel is black-humor folk), it’s not the music that disturbs. It’s the subject matter.

From the terrifying “Schlitzie’s an Idiot” through the thoroughly depressing “Half Girl, Half Snake, All Monster” to the depressingly sad “Grace McDaniels, The Mule-Faced Woman” to the depressingly terrifying “Aqualina,” the album spirals like a tilta-whirl through several meth-fueled and povertystricken lives.

Fans of Tod Browning’s legendary film Freaks or Katherine Dunn’s wicked-good novel Geek Love will engage with this fantastic record. Not out of a ghoulish fascination with the sideshow curiosities that populate those stories, but because of the humanity woven within their sawdust-choked lives.

As it turns out, just like in Freaks and Geek Love, the real monsters in these tales are the maniac normals that solicit the nomadic outcasts, exploiting them for their deformities, paying them to do the unthinkable then laughing in their faces when their nights of debauchery have ended.

“Bwoon” documents musings of a headless stillliving torso; “Half Girl ...” tells the tale of a slithering prostitute; and “Aqualina” is a love story of sorts, a fantasy that ends in a frayed rubber mermaid tail.

Drug addiction, desolation, death, and misery unfold under filthy tents and semen-stained sheets, and behind the sunken eyes of these living aberrations.

This is not the comic book circus of Mr. Bungle albums nor is it the cheesy world of Rob Zombie’s House of 1000 Corpses. This is a very human – and

Resonants, Brown Palace, Scavuzzos 8 p.m. Nov. 13. Chew, Cosmic Groove Nov. 18. Live music most weekends TRADEWINDS, 124 Charlotte St., 829-9336 Those Guys 9 p.m. Nov. 13 & 14

SAN MARCO, SOUTHBANK

JACK RABBITS, 1528 Hendricks Ave., 398-7496 Blended Brew, Emma Moseley Band, My First Circus Nov. 12.

Jeremiah Daly & the Homestead, Luke Martin Band Nov. 13.

Teen Divorce, The Dog Apollo, Weekend Atlas, Intervention Nov. 14. James McMurtry, Arvid Smith Nov. 15. Caustic Casanova, Flag on Fire, Moyamoya, Anthony & the Second Verse Nov. 17. Emily Kinney, Jacob Jeffries 8 p.m. Nov. 18 MUDVILLE MUSIC ROOM, 3104 Atlantic Blvd., 352-7008 Songwriters Showcase: Elaine Mahon, Madison Carr, Tom Edwards, Pete Loftis, Robin, Matt Soergel Nov. 11. Grace Pettis, Betty Soo Nov. 12. Gypsy Star, Rebecca Zapen Nov. 13. Loren & Mark Nov. 15 RIVER CITY BREWING COMPANY, 835 Museum Circle, 398-2299 Rob Moore Nov. 13

SOUTHSIDE, BAYMEADOWS, ARLINGTON

LATITUDE 360, 10370 Philips Hwy., 365-5555 Be Easy Nov. 12. Skytrain Nov. 15. Live music most weekends MELLOW MUSHROOM, 1800 Town Ctr. Blvd., 541-1999 Live music most weekends WHISKEY JAX, 10915 Baymeadows, 634-7208 Hard 2 Handle 9:30 p.m. Nov. 13. Country Jam every Wed. Melissa Smith every Thur. Mojo Roux Blues every Sun.

SPRINGFIELD, NORTHSIDE

SHANTYTOWN PUB, 22 W. Sixth St., 798-8222 Dendera Bloodbath Nov. 18. Live music most weekends THREE LAYERS CAFE, 1602 Walnut St., 355-9791 MJ Baker Nov. 13. Anton LaPlume Nov. 14

THE KNIFE

THE KNIFE

thus more deeply disturbing – portrayal of the underbelly of the nearly dead road-bound shows of yore. Yes, Roberts and company capitalize on a few clichés, like the dropping in of some very recognizable flying-trapeze-style calliope music, but mostly this is original and very dark songwriting.

Laudable, too, is the only non-Roberts tune, “Grace,” co-penned by Roberts and drummer Scott Sisson. Pretty as John Lennon’s “Dear Prudence,” it’s all the more heart-wrenching considering the juxtaposition of subject and melody.

Having not seen Dave Roberts since he gave me this CD upon its completion, I wonder if his brokenup Crawfish are considering a reunion any time soon.

Probably not, though before Darkest Show, I didn’t expect another release, either. To be sure, if he is writing a batch of new songs, they’ll be as inventive, ugly and maddening as his earlier work.

At least I hope so.

John E. Citrone theknife@folioweekly.com NOVEMBER 11-17, 2015 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | 23

One of Northeast Florida’s most idyllic vistas is host to JULINGTON CREEK FISH CAMP, the area’s newest destination for fresh seafood and Southern fare.

Exquisite craft cocktails are the order of the day at San Marco’s Grape and Grain Exchange.

Photo by Dennis Ho

Photo by Dennis Ho

thesaltypelicanamelia.com. F BOJ winner. Second-story outdoor bar. Owners T.J. and Al offer local seafood, Mayport shrimp, fish tacos, po’boys, cheese oysters. $$ FB K L D Daily SLIDERS Seaside Grill, 1998 S. Fletcher Ave., 277-6652, slidersseaside.com. F Oceanfront; crabcakes, fresh seafood, fried pickles. Open-air 2nd floor, balcony. $$ FB K L D Daily T-RAY’S BURGER STATION, 202 S. Eighth St., 261-6310. F 2015 BOJ winner. In an old gas station; blue plate specials, burgers, biscuits & gravy, shrimp. $ BW TO B L Mon.-Sat.

ARLINGTON, REGENCY

DICK’S Wings & Grill, 9119 Merrill Rd., 745-9300. 2015 BOJ winner. SEE ORANGE PARK. LARRY’S Subs, 1301 Monument Rd., 724-5802. F SEE O.PARK. THE STEAKHOUSE @ Gold Club, 320 Gen. Doolittle Dr., 645-5500, jacksonvillegoldclub.com. Lunch and dinner specials, free happy hour buffets Thur. & Fri. $$$ FB L D Daily

AVONDALE, ORTEGA

FLORIDA CREAMERY, 3566 St. Johns Ave., 619-5386. Ice cream, waffle cones, milkshakes, sundaes, Nathan’s grilled hot dogs. Low-fat and sugar-free choices. $ K TO L D Daily HARPOON LOUIE’S, 4070 Herschel St., Ste. 8, 389-5631, harpoonlouies.net. F Locally owned & operated 20+ years.

American pub serves 1/2-pound burgers, fish sandwiches, pasta. Local beers. $$ FB K TO L D Daily MELLOW MUSHROOM Pizza Bakers, 3611 St. Johns Ave., 388-0200. F Bite Club. 2015 BOJ winner. SEE BEACHES. MOJO NO. 4 Urban BBQ & Whiskey Bar, 3572 St. Johns Ave., 381-6670. F 2015 BOJ winner. SEE BEACHES. PINEGROVE Market & Deli, 1511 PineGrove Ave., 389-8655, pinegrovemarket.com. F BOJ winner. 40+ years. Burgers, Cuban sandwiches, subs, wraps. Onsite butcher cuts USDA choice prime aged beef. Craft beers. $ BW TO B L D Mon.-Sat. RESTAURANT ORSAY, 3630 Park St., 381-0909, restaurant orsay.com. 2015 BOJ winner. French/Southern bistro; locally grown organic ingredients. Steak frites, mussels, pork chops. Snail of Approval. $$$ FB K R, Sun.; D Nightly SIMPLY SARA’S, 2902 Corinthian Ave., 387-1000, simply saras.net. F Down-home fare, from scratch: eggplant fries, pimento cheese, baked chicken, fruit cobblers, chicken & dumplings, desserts. BYOB. $$ K TO L D Mon.-Sat., B Sat.

BAYMEADOWS

DINING DIRECTORY AMELIA ISLAND, FERNANDINA BEACH

29 SOUTH EATS, 29 S. Third St., 277-7919, 29southrest aurant.com. F Chef Scotty Schwartz’s traditional regional cuisine with modern twist. $$ L Tue.-Sat.; D Mon.-Sat.; R Sun. BARBERITOS, 1519 Sadler Rd., 277-2505. 463867 S.R. 200, Ste. 5, Yulee, 321-2240, barberitos.com. F Southwestern fare; burritos, tacos, quesadillas, salsa. $$ BW K TO L D Daily BEACH DINER, 2006 S. Eighth St., 310-3750, beachdiner. com. Innovative breakfast: Eggs on the Bayou, fish-n-grits; French toast, riders, omelets. Lunch fare: salads, burgers, sandwiches, shrimp & crabmeat salad. $$ BW K TO L D Daily BEECH STREET Bar & Grill, 801 Beech St., 572-1390, beech streetbarandgrill.com. In a restored 1889 home, Chef Charles creates with fresh, local ingredients. Local seafood, handcut Florida steaks, housemade pasta, daily specials, small plates, street food. $$$-$$$$ FB D Tue.-Sat.; Brunch, D Sun. BRETT’S WATERWAY CAFÉ, 1 S. Front St., 261-2660. F Southern hospitality, upscale waterfront spot; daily specials, fresh local seafood, aged beef. $$$ FB K L D Daily CAFÉ KARIBO, 27 N. Third St., 277-5269, cafekaribo.com.

F Family-owned; historic building. Veggie burgers, seafood, made-from-scratch desserts. Dine in or on oak-shaded patio.

Karibrew Pub next door. $$ FB K TO R, Sun.; L D Daily CHEZ LEZAN BAKERY CO., 1014 Atlantic Ave., 491-4663, chezlezanbakery.com. Fresh European-style breads, pastries: croissants, muffins, cakes, pies. $ TO B R L Daily DAVID’S Restaurant & Lounge, 802 Ash St., 310-6049, ameliaislanddavids.com. Fine dining, historic district. Fresh seafood, prime aged meats, rack of lamb. $$$$ FB D Wed.-Mon. DICK’S Wings & Grill, 474313 E. S.R. 200, 491-3469.

450077 S.R. 200, Callahan, 879-0993. 2015 BOJ winner.

SEE ORANGE PARK.

ELIZABETH POINTE Lodge, 98 S. Fletcher Ave., 277-4851, elizabethpointelodge.com. F Award-winning B&B. Seaside dining, inside or out. Hot buffet breakfast daily. Homestyle soups, sandwiches, desserts. $$$ BW B L D Daily JACK & DIANE’S, 708 Centre St., 321-1444,

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jackanddianescafe.com. F 1887 shotgun house. Jambalaya, French toast, mac-n-cheese, vegan/vegetarian items. Porch. $$ FB K B L D Daily LULU’S at Thompson House, 11 S. 7th St., 432-8394, lulusamelia.com. F Po’boys, salads, local seafood, local shrimp. Reservations. $$$ BW K TO R Sun.; L D Tue.-Sat. MOON RIVER Pizza, 925 S. 14th St., 321-3400, moonriver pizza.net. F 2015 BOJ winner. Authentic Northern-style pizzas, 20+ toppings, pie or the slice. $ BW TO L D Mon.-Sat. THE MUSTARD SEED CAFÉ, 833 TJ Courson Rd., 277-3141, nassaushealthfoods.net. Casual organic eatery, juice bar, in Nassau Health Foods. All-natural organic items, smoothies, juice, herbal tea. $$ TO B L Mon.-Sat. PABLO’S Mexican Restaurant Grill & Cantina, 12 N. Second St., 261-0049. Chicken, carnes, fajitas, burritos, tacos, daily specials. Margaritas. $$$ FB K TO L D Daily THE PECAN ROLL BAKERY, 122 S. Eighth St., 491-9815, thepecanrollbakery.com. F The bakery, near historic district, has sweet and savory pastries, cookies, cakes, bagels, breads, all made from scratch. $ K TO B L Wed.-Sun. PI INFINITE COMBINATIONS, 19 S. Third St., 432-8535, pi32 034.wix.com/piinfinite. All bar service; NYC-style. Specialty pizzas, pie or slice, toppings: sliced truffle mushrooms, little neck clams, eggs, shrimp. Courtyard. $$ BW TO L D Wed.-Sun. PLAE, 80 Amelia Village Cir., 277-2132, plaefl.net. Bite Club. Bistro-style venue serves whole fried fish, duck breast.

Outside. $$$ FB L Tue.-Sat.; D Nightly SALTY PELICAN Bar & Grill, 12 N. Front St., 277-3811,

To get your restaurant listed here, just call your account manager or Sam Taylor at 904.260.9770 ext. 111 or staylor@folioweekly.com.

DINING DIRECTORY KEY

Average Entrée Cost $ = Less than $8 $$ = $8-$14 $$$ = $15-$22 $$$$ = $23 & up BW = Beer/Wine FB = Full Bar K = Kids’ Menu TO = Take Out B = Breakfast R = Brunch L = Lunch D = Dinner Bite Club = Hosted free FW Bite Club tasting. fwbiteclub.com.

2015 Best of Jax winner F = FW distribution spot

AL’S PIZZA, 8060 Philips Hwy., Ste. 105, 731-4300. F 2015 BOJ winner. SEE BEACHES. INDIA’S Restaurant, 9802 Baymeadows Rd., Ste. 8, 620-0777, indiajax.com. F 2015 BOJ winner. Authentic cuisine, lunch buffet. Curries, vegetable dishes, lamb, chicken, shrimp, fish tandoori. $$ BW L Mon.-Sat.; D Nightly LARRY’S Giant Subs, 3928 Baymeadows, 737-7740. 8616 Baymeadows Rd., 739-2498. F SEE ORANGE PARK. METRO DINER, 9802 Baymeadows, 425-9142. F 2015 BOJ winner. SEE SAN MARCO. NATIVE SUN Natural Foods Market & Deli, 11030 Baymeadows, 260-2791. SEE MANDARIN. PATTAYA THAI Grille, 9551 Baymeadows, Ste. 1, 646-9506, ptgrille.com. Family-owned Thai place serves traditional fare, vegetarian, new Thai; curries, seafood, noodles, soups. Lowsodium, gluten-free, too. $$$ BW TO L D Tue.-Sun. TEQUILA’S Mexican Restaurant, 10915 Baymeadows, Ste. 101, 363-1365, tequilasjacksonville.com. F Authentic fare, made daily with fresh ingredients. Vegetarian dishes; daily drink specials. Nonstop happy hour. $$ FB L D Daily THE WELL WATERING HOLE, 3928 Baymeadows, Ste. 9, 737-7740, thewellwateringhole.com. Local craft beers, wines by the glass or bottle, champagne cocktails. Meatloaf sandwiches, pulled Peruvian chicken, homestyle vegan black bean burgers. $$ BW K TO D Tue.-Sat. WHISKEY JAX, 10915 Baymeadows, Ste. 135, 634-7208, whiskeyjax.com. New gastropub has craft beers, burgers, handhelds, tacos, whiskey. $$ FB L D Sat. & Sun.; D Daily.

BEACHES

(Locations are in Jax Beach unless otherwise noted.)

AL’S PIZZA, 303 Atlantic Blvd., Atlantic Beach, 249-0002, alspizza.com. F 2015 BOJ winner. New York-style, gourmet pizzas, baked dishes. All-day happy hour Mon.-Thur. $ FB K TO L D Daily ANGIE’S SUBS, 1436 Beach Blvd., 246-2519. ANGIE’S GROM, 204 Third Ave. S., 246-7823. F 2015 BOJ winner. Subs made with fresh ingredients for more than 25 years. One word: Peruvian. Huge salads, blue-ribbon iced tea. $ BW TO L D Daily BOLD BEAN COFFEE ROASTERS, 2400 S. Third St., Ste. 201.

F 2015 BOJ winner. SEE RIVERSIDE. ESPETO Brazilian Steakhouse, 1396 Beach Blvd., 388-4884, espetosteakhouse.com. Just relocated, serving beef, pork, lamb, chicken, sausage; full menu, bar fare, craft cocktails, Brazilian beers. $$ FB D Daily EUROPEAN STREET CAFÉ, 992 Beach Blvd., 249-3001. F 2015 BOJ winner. SEE RIVERSIDE. FLYING IGUANA Taqueria & Tequila Bar, 207 Atlantic Blvd., NB, 853-5680 F 2015 BOJ winner. Latin American, tacos, seafood, carnitas, Cubana fare. 100+ tequilas. $ FB L D Daily LARRY’S Subs, 657 Third St. N., 247-9620. F SEE O.PARK. MELLOW MUSHROOM, 1018 Third St. N., Ste. 2, 241-5600, mellowmushroom.com. F Bite Club. 2015 BOJ winner.

Hoagies, gourmet pizzas: Mighty Meaty, vegetarian, Kosmic Karma. 35 tap beers. Nonstop happy hour. $ FB K TO L D Daily METRO DINER, 1534 Third St. N., 853-6817. F 2015 BOJ winner. SEE SAN MARCO. MEZZA Restaurant & Bar, 110 First St., NB, 249-5573, mezzarestaurantandbar.com. F Near-the-ocean spot, 20-plus years. Casual bistro fare: gourmet wood-fired pizzas, nightly specials. Dine inside, on patio. $$$ FB K D Mon.-Sat.

DINING DIRECTORY

MOJO KITCHEN BBQ Pit, 1500 Beach Blvd., 247-6636, mojob bq.com. F 2015 BOJ winner. Pulled pork, beef, chicken, Carolina-style, Delta fried catfish, sides. $$ FB K TO L D Daily NIPPERS Beach Grille, 2309 Beach Blvd., 247-3300, nippersbeachgrille.com. The chef-driven Southern coastal cuisine has local fare and dishes with a Caribbean flavor, served in an island atmosphere on the ICW. Dine inside or on Tiki deck. $$ FB K L D Wed.-Sun.; D Mon. & Tue. POE’S Tavern, 363 Atlantic Blvd., AB, 241-7637. Gastropub, 50+ beers, gourmet burgers, hand-cut fries, fish tacos, Edgar’s Drunken Chili, daily fish sandwich special. $$ FB K L D Daily RAGTIME TAVERN & Seafood Grill, 207 Atlantic Blvd., AB, 241-7877, ragtimetavern.com. F For 30+ years, iconic seafood place. Blackened snapper, sesame tuna, Ragtime shrimp. Daily happy hour. $$ FB L D Daily SALT LIFE FOOD SHACK, 1018 Third St. N., 372-4456, saltlifefoodshack.com. Specialties: signature tuna poke bowl, fresh sushi, Ensenada tacos, local fried shrimp, in modern open-air space. $$ FB K TO L D Daily SLIDERS SEAFOOD Grille & Oyster Bar, 218 First St., NB, 246-0881, slidersseafoodgrille.com. Beach-casual spot.

Faves: Fresh fish tacos, gumbo. Key lime pie, ice cream sandwiches. $$ FB K L Sat. & Sun.; D Nightly SNEAKERS Sports Grille, 111 Beach Blvd., 482-1000, sneakerssportsgrille.com. 2015 BOJ winner. 20-plus tap beers, TVs. Happy hour Mon.-Fri. $ FB K L D Daily SURFING SOMBRERO, 222 First St. N., 834-9377. New oceanfront place serves authentic fare – like paella. Drink specials. Dine in or outside. $$ FB L D Daily SURFWICHES Sandwich Shop, 1537 Penman Rd., 241-6996, surfwiches.com. New craft sandwich shop has Yankee-style steaks and hoagies, all made to order. $ BW TO K L D Daily

DOWNTOWN

AKEL’S Deli, 21 W. Church St., 665-7324, akelsdeli.com.

F New York-style deli offers freshly made subs (3 Wise Guys, Champ), burgers, gyros, breakfast bowls, ranchero wrap, vegetarian dishes. $ K TO B L Mon.-Fri. THE CANDY APPLE Café & Cocktails, 400 N. Hogan St., 353-9717, thecandyapplecafe.com. Sandwiches, entrées, salads. $$ FB K L, Mon.; L D Tue.-Sun. CASA DORA, 108 E. Forsyth St., 356-8282. F Chef Sam Hamidi has been serving genuine Italian fare for 35-plus years: veal, seafood, gourmet pizza. The homemade salad dressing is a specialty. $ BW K L Mon.-Fri.; D Mon.-Sat. OLIO Market, 301 E. Bay St., 356-7100, oliomarket.com. F From-scratch soups, sandwiches. Duck grilled cheese, seen on Best Sandwich in America. $$ BW TO B R L Mon.-Fri. SWEET PETE’S, 400 N. Hogan St., 376-7161. F All-natural sweet shop has candy made of all natural flavors, no artificial anything. Several kinds of honey. $ TO Daily ZODIAC Bar & Grill, 120 W. Adams St., 354-8283, thezodiac barandgrill.com. Mediterranean cuisine, American fare, paninis, vegetarian dishes. Daily lunch buffet. Espressos, hookahs. Happy hour Wed.-Sat. $ FB L Mon.-Fri.

FLEMING ISLAND

GRASSROOTS Natural Market, 1915 East-West Parkway, 541-0009. F 2015 BOJ winner. SEE RIVERSIDE.

specials, HDTVs, pool tables. Late-nite menu. $$ FB L Tue.Sun.; D Nightly

MANDARIN, NW ST. JOHNS

AKEL’S DELI, 12926 GranBay Pkwy. W., 880-2008. F SEE DOWNTOWN.

AL’S PIZZA, 11190 San Jose Blvd., 260-4115. F 2015 BOJ winner. SEE BEACHES. ATHENS Café, 6271 St. Augustine Rd., Ste. 7, 733-1199.

F Dolmades (stuffed grape leaves), baby shoes (stuffed eggplant). Greek beers. $$ BW L Mon.-Fri.; D Mon.-Sat. DICK’S WINGS & GRILL, 10391 Old St. Augustine Rd., 880-7087. F 2015 BOJ winner. SEE ORANGE PARK. FIRST COAST Deli & Grill, 6082 St. Augustine, 7337477. Diner fare: pancakes, bacon, sandwiches, burgers. $ K TO B L Daily LARRY’S Subs, 11365 San Jose, 674-2945. F SEE O.PARK. METRO DINER, 12807 San Jose Blvd., 638-6185. F 2015 BOJ winner. SEE SAN MARCO. NATIVE SUN Natural Foods MArket & Deli, 10000 San Jose Blvd., 260-6950, nativesunjax.com. F Organic soups, sandwiches, wraps, baked goods, prepared foods. Juice, smoothie and coffee bar. All-natural, organic beers, wines.

Indoor, outdoor dining. $ BW TO K B L D Daily THE RED ELEPHANT Pizza & Grill, 10131 San Jose Blvd., Ste. 12, 683-3773, redelephantpizza.com. Casual, familyfriendly eatery. Pizzas, sandwiches, grill specials, burgers, pasta, plus gluten-free-friendly items. $ FB K L D Daily

ORANGE PARK

DICK’S Wings & Grill, 6055 Youngerman Cir., 778-1101, dickswingsandgrill.com. 1803 East West Pkwy., 375-2559. 2015 BOJ winner. NASCAR-themed place serves 365 varieties of wings, half-pound burgers, ribs. $ FB K TO L D Daily THE HILLTOP, 2030 Wells Rd., 272-5959, hilltop-club.com.

Southern-style fine dining. New Orleans shrimp, certified Black Angus prime rib, she-crab soup, desserts. Extensive bourbon selection. $$$ FB D Tue.-Sat. LARRY’S Giant Subs, 1330 Blanding Blvd., 276-7370.

1545 C.R. 220, 278-2827. 700 Blanding, Ste. 15, 2723553. 5733 Roosevelt, 446-9500. 1401 S. Orange Ave., Green Cove, 284-7789, larryssubs.com. F All over NEFlorida, Larry’s piles ’em high and serves ’em fast; 33+ years. Hot and cold subs, soups, salads. Some Larry’s serve breakfast. $ K TO B L D Daily METRO DINER, 2034 Kingsley Ave., 375-8548. F 2015 BOJ winner. SEE SAN MARCO. SNACSHACK, 179 College Dr., Ste. 19, 682-7622, snacsha ck.menu. F New bakery and café has bagels, muffins, breads, cookies, brownies, snack treats. $$ K BW TO B, L & D Daily

PONTE VEDRA BEACH

AL’S PIZZA, 635 A1A N., 543-1494. F 2015 BOJ winner.

SEE BEACHES.

DICK’S Wings, 100 Marketside Ave., 829-8134, dickswings andgrill.com. F 2015 BOJ winner. SEE ORANGE PARK. LARRY’S SUBS, 830 A1A N., 273-3993. F SEE ORANGE PARK.

GRILL ME!

BRENO VERLANGIERI Espeto Brazilian Steakhouse, 1396 Beach Blvd., Jax Beach BIRTHPLACE: Porto Alegre, Brazil YEARS IN THE BIZ: 10 FAVORITE RESTAURANT (other than mine): Santo Antonio, Porto Alegre BEST CUISINE STYLE: Brazilian GO-TO INGREDIENTS: Sage and shallots IDEAL MEAL: Picanha, with fresh tomatoes and onions WON’T CROSS MY LIPS: Liver INSIDER’S SECRET: Marinade CULINARY TREAT: Chicken hearts

MELLOW MUSHROOM Pizza Bakers, 1800 Town Ctr. Blvd., 541-1999. F Bite Club. 2015 BOJ winner. SEE BEACHES. MOJO SMOKEHOUSE, 1810 Town Center Blvd., Ste. 8, 264-0636. F 2015 BOJ winner. SEE BEACHES. WHITEY’S FISH CAMP, 2032 C.R. 220, 269-4198, whiteys fishcamp.com. F Real fish camp. Gator tail, freshwater catfish, daily specials, on Swimming Pen Creek. Tiki bar.

Come by boat, bike or car. $ FB K TO L Tue.-Sun.; D Nightly

INTRACOASTAL WEST

AL’S PIZZA, 14286 Beach Blvd., Ste. 31, 223-0991. F 2015 BOJ winner. SEE BEACHES. DICK’S Wings, 14286 Beach Blvd., 223-0115. F 2015 BOJ winner. SEE ORANGE PARK. LARRY’S Subs, 10750 Atlantic Blvd., Ste. 14, 642-6980. F SEE ORANGE PARK.

TIME OUT SPORTS GRILL, 13799 Beach Blvd., Ste. 5, 223-6999, timeoutsportsgrill.com. F Locally-owned-andoperated. Hand-tossed pizzas, wings, wraps. Daily drink

RIVERSIDE, 5 POINTS, WESTSIDE

13 GYPSIES, 887 Stockton St., 389-0330, 13gypsies.com.

2015 BOJ winner. Authentic Mediterranean peasant cuisine updated for Americans; tapas, blackened octopus, risotto of the day, coconut mango curry chicken. $$ BW L D Tue.-Sat. AKEL’S DELICATESSEN, 245 Riverside Ave., 791-3336. F SEE DOWNTOWN.

AL’S PIZZA, 1620 Margaret St., 388-8384. F 2015 BOJ winner. SEE BEACHES. BLACK SHEEP Restaurant, 1534 Oak St., 355-3793, blacksheep5points.com. New American, Southern twist; local source ingredients. Rooftop bar. $$$ FB R Sat. & Sun.; L D Daily BOLD BEAN Coffee Roasters, 869 Stockton St., Stes. 1 & 2, 855-1181. F 2015 BOJ winner. Small-batch, artisanal coffee roasting. Organic, fair trade. $ BW TO B L Daily BREW FIVE POINTS, 1024 Park St., 714-3402, brewfivepoints.com. F 2015 BOJ winner. Local craft beer, espresso, coffee/wine bar. Rotating drafts, 75+ canned

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DINING DIRECTORY

ST. AUGUSTINE

AL’S PIZZA, 1 St. George St., 824-4383. F 2015 BOJ winner. SEE BEACHES. CARMELO’S Marketplace & Pizzeria, 146 King St., 494-6658, carmelosmarketplace.com. New York-style brick-oven-baked pizza, fresh sub rolls, Boar’s Head meats & cheeses, garlic herb wings. Outdoor seating, Wi-Fi. $$ BW TO L D Daily DICK’S Wings & Grill, 965 S.R. 16, 825-4540. 4010 U.S. 1 S., 547-2669. 2015 BOJ winner. SEE ORANGE PARK. THE FLORIDIAN, 39 Cordova St., 829-0655, thefloridian staug.com. 2015 BOJ winner. Updated Southern fare.

Vegetarian, gluten-free. Fried green tomato bruschetta, grits with shrimp, fish or tofu. $$$ BW K TO L D Wed.-Mon. GYPSY CAB COMPANY, 828 Anastasia Blvd., 824-8244, gypsycab.com. F Local mainstay 25+ years. Varied menu changes twice daily. Signature dish: Gypsy chicken. Seafood, tofu, duck, veal. Sun. brunch. $$ FB R Sun.; L D Daily MELLOW MUSHROOM Pizza Bakers, 410 Anastasia Blvd., 826-4040. F Bite Club. 2015 BOJ winner. SEE BEACHES. METRO DINER, 1000 S. Ponce de Leon Blvd., 758-3323. F 2015 BOJ winner. SEE SAN MARCO. MOJO OLD CITY BBQ, 5 Cordova St., 342-5264. F 2015 BOJ winner. SEE BEACHES. ONE TWENTY THREE BURGER HOUSE, 123 King St., 687-2790.

New spot from Carmelo’s owners. Premium burgers, made with beef from NYC butcher Schweid & Sons. Wood-fired pizzas, ice cream bar, Old World milkshakes. $$ BW K TO L D Daily SALT LIFE FOOD SHACK, 321 A1A Beach Blvd., 217-3256, saltlifefoodshack.com. SEE BEACHES.

SAN MARCO, SOUTHBANK

BASIL Thai & Sushi, 1004 Hendricks Ave., 674-0190, basil thaijax.com. F Authentic Pad Thai, curries, tempura, vegetarian, seafood, stir-fry, daily specials. $$ FB L D Mon.-Sat. BISTRO AIX, 1440 San Marco Blvd., 398-1949, bistrox. com. F Mediterranean/French inspired; steak frites, oakfired pizza, raw bar seasonal selections. $$$ FB TO L D Daily DICK’S WINGS & GRILL, 1610 University Blvd. W., 448-2110. 2015 BOJ winner. SEE ORANGE PARK. EUROPEAN STREET Café, 1704 San Marco Blvd., 398-9500.

2015 BOJ winner. SEE RIVERSIDE. $ BW K L D Daily FUSION SUSHI, 1550 University Blvd. W., 636-8688, fusionsushijax.com. F Upscale sushi spot serves a variety of fresh sushi, sashimi, hibachi, teriyaki, kiatsu. $$ K L D Daily THE GROTTO Wine & Tapas Bar, 2012 San Marco Blvd., 398-0726. F Artisanal cheese plates, empanadas, bruschetta,

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cheesecake. 60-plus wines by the glass. $$$ BW Tue.-Sun. HAMBURGER MARY’S Bar & Grille, 3333 Beach Blvd., Ste. 1, 551-2048, hamburgermarys.com. F 2015 BOJ winner.

Wings, sammies, nachos, entrées, specialty drinks, burgers. $$ K TO FB L D Daily KITCHEN ON SAN MARCO, 1402 San Marco Blvd., 396-2344, kitchenonsanmarco.com. 2015 BOJ winner. Local, national craft beers, specialty cocktails, seasonal menu, fresh, locally sourced ingredients. Sunday brunch. $$ FB L D Daily MEZZE Bar & Grill, 2016 Hendricks Ave., 683-0693, mezze jax.com. Classic cocktails, basil martinis, 35 drafts, local/craft brews, Mediterranean cuisine. Hookah patio. Happy hour. $$ FB D Daily METRO DINER, 3302 Hendricks, 398-3701, metrodiner.com.

F 2015 BOJ winner. The original upscale diner. Meatloaf, chicken pot pie, soups. $$ B R L Daily MOJO BAR-B-QUE, 1607 University Blvd. W., 732-7200. F 2015 BOJ winner. SEE BEACHES. PIZZA PALACE, 1959 San Marco Ave., 399-8815, pizzapala cejax.com. F Family-owned; spinach pizza, chicken spinach calzones, lasagna. Outside dining. $$ BW K TO L D Daily TAVERNA, 1986 San Marco Ave., 398-3005, tavernasan marco.com. Chef Sam Efron’s authentic Italian; local produce, meats. Craft beers, craft cocktails. $$$ FB K TO R L D Daily

SOUTHSIDE, TINSELTOWN

ALHAMBRA Theatre & Dining, 12000 Beach Blvd., 641-1212, alhambrajax.com. USA’s longest-running dinner theater; Chef DeJuan Roy’s themed menus. Reservations. $$ FB D Tue.-Sun. BARBERITOS, 4320 Deerwood Lake Pkwy., Ste. 106, 807-9060. F SEE AMELIA ISLAND.

DANCIN DRAGON, 9041 Southside Blvd., Ste. 138D, 3639888. BOGO lunches, Asian fusion menu. $$ FB K L D Daily DICK’S WINGS, 10750 Atlantic Blvd., 619-0954. 2015 BOJ winner. SEE ORANGE PARK. DIM SUM ROOM, 9041 Southside, 363-9888, thedimsum room.com. Shrimp dumplings, beef tripe, sesame ball.

Traditional Hong Kong noodles, barbecue. $ FB K L D Daily EUROPEAN STREET CAFÉ, 5500 Beach Blvd., 398-1717.

2015 BOJ winner. SEE RIVERSIDE. LARRY’S, 3611 St. Johns Bluff Rd. S., 641-6499. 4479 Deerwood Lake Pkwy., 425-4060. F SEE ORANGE PARK. MELLOW MUSHROOM, 9734 Deer Lake Ct., 997-1955. F Bite Club. 2015 BOJ winner. SEE BEACHES. MONROE’S Smokehouse BAR B-Q, 10771 Beach Blvd., 996-7900, monroessmokehousebbq.com. SEE RIVERSIDE. OVINTE, 10208 Buckhead Branch Dr., 900-7730, ovinte. com. 2015 BOJ winner. European-style dining influenced by Italy, Spain, Mediterranean. Small plates, entrée-size portions, selections from charcuterie menu. $$$ BW TO R D Daily TAVERNA YAMAS, 9753 Deer Lake Ct., 854-0426, tavernayamas.com. F Bite Club. Char-broiled kabobs, seafood, wines, desserts. Belly dancing. $$ FB K L D Daily

SPRINGFIELD, NORTHSIDE

DICK’S Wings, 12400 Yellow Bluff Rd., Ste. 101, 619-9828.

2015 BOJ winner. SEE ORANGE PARK. HOLA Mexican Restaurant, 1001 N. Main St., 356-3100, holamexicanrestaurant.com. F Fajitas, burritos, enchiladas, daily specials. Happy hour; sangria. $ BW K TO L D Mon.-Sat. LARRY’S Subs, 12001 Lem Turner Rd., 764-9999. SEE ORANGE PARK.

BITE-SIZED

photo by Rebecca Gibson

craft beers; sodas, tea. Rotating seasonal menu of waffles, pastries, toasts, desserts to pair with specialty coffees, craft beers. $$ BW K B L Daily CORNER TACO, 818 Post St., 240-0412, cornertaco.com.

Made-from-scratch “Mexclectic street food,” tacos, nachos, gluten-free, vegetarian options. $ BW L D Daily.

DERBY ON PARK, 1068 Park St., 379-3343. New American cuisine, upscale retro atmosphere in historic landmark building. Shrimp & grits, lobster bites, 10-oz. gourmet burger.

Dine inside or out. $$ FB TO Wknd brunch. B, L D Tue.-Sun. EDGEWOOD Bakery, 1012 S. Edgewood Ave., 389-8054, edgewoodbakery.com. 68+ years, full-service. From-scratch pastries, petit fours, pies, custom cakes. Espresso/pastry café: sandwiches, smoothies, soups. $$ K TO B L Tue.-Sat. EUROPEAN STREET Café, 2753 Park St., 384-9999. 2015 BOJ winner. 130+ import beers, 20 on tap. Sandwiches.

Outside dining at some EStreets. $ BW K L D Daily GRASSROOTS Natural Market, 2007 Park St., 384-4474, thegrassrootsmarket.com. F 2015 BOJ winner. Juice bar; certified organic fruits, vegetables. 300+ craft/import beers, 50 wines, produce, humanely raised meats, deli, raw items, vegan, vitamins. Wraps, sandwiches. $ BW TO B L D Daily HAWKERS ASIAN Street Fare, 1001 Park St., 508-0342, hawkerstreetfare.com. 2015 BOJ winner. Authentic dishes from mobile stalls. $ BW TO L D Daily JOHNNY’S Deli & Grille, 474 Riverside Ave., 356-8055. F Casual; sandwiches, classic salads, homefries. $ TO B L Daily KNEAD BAKESHOP, 1173 Edgewood Ave. S., 634-7617 Locally-owned, family-run shop; made-from-scratch pastries, artisan breads, pies, sandwiches, soups. $ TO B L Tue.-Sun. LARRY’S Subs, 1509 Margaret St., 674-2794. 7895 Normandy, 781-7600. 8102 Blanding, 779-1933. F SEE O.PARK. METRO DINER, 4495 Roosevelt Blvd., 999-4600. F 2015 BOJ winner. SEE SAN MARCO. MONROE’S Smokehouse BAR-B-Q, 4838 Highway Ave., 389-5551, monroessmokehousebbq.com. Wings, pulled pork, brisket, turkey, chicken, ribs. Sides: beans, baked beans, mac-n-cheese, collards. $$ K TO L Mon.-Sat.; D Fri. MOON RIVER PIZZA, 1176 Edgewood Ave. S., 389-4442. F 2015 BOJ winner. SEE AMELIA ISLAND. MOSSFIRE GRILL, 1537 Margaret St., 355-4434, mossfire. com. F Southwestern fish tacos, enchiladas. Happy hour Mon.-Sat. upstairs lounge, all day Sun. $$ FB K L D Daily O’BROTHERS Irish Pub, 1521 Margaret St., 854-9300, obroth ersirishpub.com. F Shepherd’s pie w/Stilton crust, Guinness mac-n-cheese, fish-n-chips. Patio. $$ FB K TO L D Daily PATTAYA Thai Grille, 1526 King, 503-4060. SEE BAYMEADOWS. rain dogs, 1045 Park St., 379-4969. 2015 BOJ winner.

Bar food. $ D SOUTHERN ROOTS Filling Station, 1275 King St., 513-4726, southernrootsjax.com. 2015 BOJ winner. Healthy, light vegan fare; local, organic ingredients. Specials, on bread, local greens or rice, change daily. Coffees, teas. $ Tue.-Sun. SUSHI CAFÉ, 2025 Riverside Ave., Ste. 204, 384-2888, sushicafejacksonville.com. F Monster Roll, Jimmy Smith Roll; faves Rock-n-Roll, Dynamite Roll. Hibachi, tempura, katsu, teriyaki. Indoor or patio. $$ BW L D Daily

FOLK YEAH!

Opportunity came knocking, and RYAN REID answered

House, a local nonprofit promoting the dignity and FOLKFOOD IS THE LATEST NORTHEAST FLORIDA self-worth of people with disabilities. food truck going brick-and-mortar; at its grand I’m always up for pulled pork and fish tacos, opening last week, a steady influx of hungry and epicurious humans got to see inside its new Hogan but I wanted to branch out. I hadn’t had meatloaf Street digs. The restaurant is tiny, so the horde of for a while, so I thought, why not? I was hungry, customers could have been problematic, but owner and the meatloaf sounded hearty. My idea of Ryan Reid is used to the bustle. After less than a year meatloaf: a hamburger in loaf form with a drizzle of the food truck world’s grueling grind, the transition of ketchup (sorry, Mom). Reid’s idea (thank from truck to brick might be the fastest on record, goodness) of meatloaf: a steamy, soft blend of zooming to completion in less than beef, pork, and vegetables, with five months. But when you know, a curry sauce light years beyond FOLKFOOD you know, and Reid says he knew it Heinz 57 ($9). The curry sauce 219 Hogan St., was so good, it could work as a was time to go stationary.

Downtown, 333-8392 dipping sauce for fries, chicken, Reid grew up in Georgia, from vegetables, even ice cream – whence he gets his inspiration for hey, I’d be willing to try it.

Southern meals with a modern twist. Eventually, circumstances led him to Jacksonville. In May, I could write a page on Folkfood’s kale salad, he opened Folkfood (the truck version), which but I’ll keep it to a paragraph. The salad ($3) quickly became a favorite of the urban core nineis sold as a side or an entrée, and you can add to-fivers. Reid says that the response Folkfood fish or chicken. Colorful, crunchy kale leaves received when it would post up among the bustle and grapefruit chunks made it pretty and tasty. of a revitalized Hemming Park encouraged him Each bite was tart and sweet, with tons of flavor to realize the opportunity to go brick-and-mortar from the dressing. The dish is simple, with few was well within reach. Lucky for him, Skyway Café ingredients, yet the flavors are magical. Next time, was selling its Hogan location. Reid jumped at the I’ll get it as an entrée. chance, abandoning the food truck altogether. (If Reid knew what he wanted when he first you’re planning to start up a food truck, he’s got a opened the food truck version of Folkfood: a lead on a gently used one in need of a new owner). down-to-earth place that had the potential to Though he isn’t keeping the truck, he is become something bigger. Folkfood took that keeping a food-truck-sized menu, sticking to a dream and ran with it, prepared to make its mark few staple items (like pulled pork and fish tacos) on Jacksonville. With a success story of truck-torotating the remaining selections. Folkfood will brick within six months, and plenty of love from always have a couple of homemade desserts on the community, I’d say Folkfood has everything it offer to round off each meal, as well as some needs to be a new Downtown favorite. local brews once the restaurant is licensed. Reid Rebecca Gibson is establishing a sense of community supporting mail@folioweekly.com local businesses when possible, from including ––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––– Read more of Rebecca’s dining adventures at Bold City Brewery’s Duke’s Brown Ale in Folkfood’s somewhereinthecityjax.com mac-and-cheese to helping to support Dandelion

BITE SIZED

LOOKIN’ FOR LOVE FOLIO

W E E K LY

FOLIO LIVING

PET

LOVERS’

GUIDE

DEAR DAVI

K9? MORE LIKE K10!

TRAINING A HERO IS HARD WORK. Just ask Regan, the Belgian Malanois. She graduated at the head of her class at K9s For Warriors and is top dog to her handler, Brett Simon.

Regan was a sheltered refugee from Georgia before moving to Ponte Vedra and enrolling in K9s For Warriors, a program aimed at providing service canines to military personnel suffering from post-traumatic stress disability. What a wag-worthy opportunity to change the life of a war veteran!

Regan was put through an evaluation process before she could begin her training. Standard weight? Check. Standard height? Check.

Temperament? One that could certainly handle the stress of service-work in public. She passed with flying colors and was ready to move onward to obedience training.

You could call Regan a quick learner. In just six weeks, she mastered sit and stay, heel and down, and come-when-called — that’s a skill I’m still trying to lick!

Just like that, she forged ahead to task training. This is the nuts and bolts of the program, where dogs learn to perform skills that lessen the symptoms of PTSD for their humans. Total training hours for an average dog are usually about 220, but Regan conquered it all in half that time. She was already matched with Brett and ready to learn the tasks for his specific needs.

So what does Regan do to help Brett?

If Brett’s feeling uneasy in a social setting, Regan will create a safety bubble of space between him and the people around him. It’s called blocking and it’s used to fend off crowds and approaching people who could possibly trigger his distress.

Ordering a burger at the counter? No problem.

Regan’s got his back, literally. She performs a sit-and-stay facing away to watch behind him and a mere nudge from her will make Brett aware of any distractions coming his way. If Regan has a

hunch that a panic attack is building, she uses body contact to distract and return him to the here and now.

Jumping up and licking his face works, but if his anxiety grows, she will rest her paws on his body, flatten her ears on her head and stare at him, as if to say “Cut it out. I am here.”

As an example, let’s say Brett stumbles and falls. Regan will rush to his side and, on command, stop-drop-and-brace. In that scenario, she gets into a helpful position, as Brett puts his hands on her shoulders or hips and slowly stands up.

And Regan is also an expert at hands-free leash walking. This skill gives Brett freedom to go about his daily routine, like grocery shopping and buying treats for Regan, with her by his side.

A hard fact: 99 percent of those with PTSD develop an overwhelming sense of fear and anxiety, which leads to isolation and often suicide.

But the good news is that there is hope. Locally, K9s For Warriors has already matched 170 veterans with service dogs and the waiting list continues to grow, giving both veterans and sheltered dogs a new leash on life.

For more info visit k9sforwarriors.org or call 686-1956.

Davi mail@folioweekly.com _____________________________________ Davi is a brown dachshund with an appetite for adventure. He loves sweet potato treats, playing at the park with friends, and exploring the unknown.

BEASTS OF BURDEN: PET TIP OF THE WEEK MEAN PEOPLE SUCK (ALWAYS) Checking your furry friend (we mean your dog or cat, OK, weirdo?) for ticks should be part of a regular pet-care routine.

And falling temperatures don’t mean you should be any less persistent. According to The Pet Health Network, many species of ticks can survive even past the first winter frost. So keep checking for those little suckers, and be leery of leaf and garden litter, as these piles of yard waste are the preferred breeding grounds for ticks.

A SNOOKI

D

O

Snooki is a five-year old black lab mix. She is housebroken and knows commands. She will work for treats and she loves to talk.

So if you’d like a dog to bark and keep away intruders, she is the one for you. Aside from the barking, Snookie is very calm and would like to snuggle on the couch with you.

For adoption information go to jaxhumane.org

P

T

A

B

L

E

S

ZAHARA

Zahara is a two-year old tabby cat. She is fine around other cats and is very playful! She is a social cat who enjoys people.

She has been with us for 3 months and we have no idea why - she’s purrfect!

For adoption information go to jaxhumane.org

To see your pet event here, send event name, time, date, location with complete street address and city, admission price, contact number/website to print, to mdryden@folioweekly.com – at least two weeks before the event.

NOVEMBER 11-17, 2015 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | 27

FREEWILL ASTROLOGY

TARZAN, ANDY WARHOL, FRANZ KAFKA, HOMER SIMPSON & BOXING ARIES (March 21-April 19): “I demand unconditional love and complete freedom,” wrote Slovenian poet Tomaž Šalamun. “That is why I am terrible.” In accordance with astrological omens, here’s the chance, at least temporarily, to join Šalamun in demanding unconditional love and complete freedom. But unlike him, you must satisfy one condition: Avoid being terrible. You’ll have to summon unprecedented amounts of emotional intelligence and collaborative ingenuity.

OK, no more Ms. Nice Copy Editor. The word limit is FORTY (40). Y’all submit ISUs with waaaay more than 40, so I have to TAKE WORDS OUT. What if one word was vital info for your target to recognize you, fall in love and y’all ride off in the sunset? Oopsie!

Struck out AGAIN because you can’t count words (or spell, but that’s another battle for another week). It’s your own damn fault. Who’d love a dork who can’t even count?

LITTLE RIVER BAND CONCERT You: Tall, long-haired dude, very handsome. Chatted in box office @ Florida Theatre. Me: Too shy to introduce myself. I’ll be @ Art Walk Nov. 19. If feeling’s mutual, bring me a flower. When: Nov. 5. Where: Florida Theatre. #1570-1111

ECLIPSE RIVERSIDE 9/11 Super-cute brunette, ’80s night, black romper, white sandals. With group. Me: Solo; noticed matching outfi t friend telling you to ask me to dance. Wanted to approach. Group left. Second chance?

I’d dance the night away with you. When: Sept. 11.

Where: Eclipse Riverside. #1560-0916

FIRST WATCH HOT BREAKFAST You: Hot guy, adorable dog; sexy smile, gorgeous blue eyes, captured my heart. Me: In love with you. Hoping you’ll give me chance someday to be your Queen. Let’s run away to the islands together. When: Oct. 31. Where: First Watch Ponte Vedra. #1569-1104

FIRE BUG I saw you, late night on a Friday. You were on fire, so hot. Couldn’t tell if it was your flaming personality or that fl aming staff. Night dives, long chats, but why you didn’t you ever text me? When: Sept. 4.

Where: Beach. #1559-0916

IT MATTERS To me ... in my dreams. Remember still, our time. Your lips, your intoxicating scent. US, together. One night of bliss maybe? Mexican magic? When: Oct. 7. Where: Los Portalas. #1568-1104 MOM WANTS YOU Daughter and I outside Lynch’s. You: LEO on bicycle, handsome, great calves! Later, dealt with Walgreens drunk. Little shy … my daughter said to get your attention. Drinks, Super Troopers, Training Day … what’s your speed? When: Oct. 13. Where: Lynch’s Jax Beach. #1567-1028 YOU WAVED BACK GRINNING You: Bad-ass-looking guy, big black truck. Me: Soccer-mom-looking girl, silver minivan. Waved at you driving on 295-N, played a little cat-and-mouse, you got off on I-95-S. Let me prove looks can be deceiving. When: Oct. 3, 7-ish. Where: 295 North. #1566-1021 NOTHING MATTERS Self-hypnosis can’t stop me thinking from of you. No matter where I go and what I do, I still remember those beautiful eyes and the way my heart jumps when I see you. When: Oct. 6. Where: Luigi’s Pizza. #1565-1014 HOT MINI DRIVER You: Getting in red Mini near SunRay, hot white-rimmed glasses. Drake blasting from your car as you almost hit in crosswalk; gave me a thumbs-up. Me: Tall skater nerd, Donuts For Jesus shirt. You Let’s hang out. When: Sept. 29. Where: Five Points. #1564-1014 TALL, DARK, HANDSOME, PATRIOTS FAN Jags/Pats game. You: Pats shirt, jeans; with friends by bus watching game. Me: Short wavy auburn hair, Jags tank, cut-offs. Locked eyes as I went to sit. Heart skipped a beat at your handsomeness. Drinks on me, celebrate your win? :) When: Sept. 27. Where: Mellow Mushroom Jax Beach. #1563-0930 BOWL ME OVER Me: In the mood to be pinned. You: Lakers jersey. Bowling but said you’d rather play video games. Said you’re about to take a trip into Asia. Can we bowl balls together in Asia? When: Sept. 25. Where: Jax Lanes. #1564-0930

YOU WALKED IN TATTOO SHOWIN’ ISU: Black leggings, open shirt, chest tat, soft voice, boots, hopeful eyes, smooth skin. You said black don’t crack. Love to have good time with you; you said futile; keep trying. Sorry about bad night. When: Sept. 4.

Where: Parental Home Road. #1558-0916 BLUE ORBS You: Jean shorts, blonde hair, biggest blue eyes I’ve ever seen. I swear they glowed; when I fi rst saw you, lights in the place went dim. Can’t remember shirt color; just passing through, mesmerized by your eyes.

When: Sept. 2. Where: Bold Bean Riverside. #1557-0909 YOU LEFT ME … SPEECHLESS The Prince Party. Your purple face stopped my heart. Wanna see your moves, your lights, every night. Let’s meet again: you, me and Prince. We can be silent together. When: Aug. 28. Where: 1904 Music Hall. #1556-0909 60-YEAR-OLD HIPPIE CHICK You still believe in those 60s values, modern technology, bikinis, no money worries, meditation, humanism, being groovy. Me: Bearded, beyond cool beach bum. Us. Why wait? Let’s fall in love, live at beach. Anything’s possible.

When: Aug. 20. Where: Mickler’s Landing. #1555-0909 NATURE’S OWN BY MY OWN! You: Tall, handsome Nature’s Own truck driver delivering bread to Burger King; most beautiful guy I’ve ever seen!

Me: Ordering drive-thru breakfast. You smiled at me, our eyes met. Let’s meet 6:15p Sept. 5 @ BK. When: Aug. 29. Where: BK, Blanding/Kingsley. #1554-0902 EVERY SUPERWOMAN NEEDS A SUPERMAN You: Tall, dark, collared shirt buttoned to top, shorts, Jordans, drink, surrounded by ratchets. Me: Average height, slim, slacks, blouse, bun hair, lured by lightskin man (insider); chose one another instead. 1 year, counting. Love you! When: April 30, 2014. Where: Jim’s Place. #1553-0902 TALL, DRUNK AND HANDSOME You: Hanging out in a sleeveless Budweiser shirt. I like your shitty leg tattoos.

Me: Overgrown Mohawk and too many hooker shots.

Bake me some bread and get pretty with me. When: June. Where: Your lap, Birdies. #1552-0902

HUNGER GAMES Hungry; got hungrier you entered. Told me you were going east to eat genuine Asian. Wanted to talk more but you had to go because your cousin, Jimmy, owed you a quarter. Let’s eat out together? When: Sept.

14. Where: China Wok. #1562-0923

I FOUND YOUR RENTAL CAR CARD ISU sitting with your family; you’re so good-looking I needed to keep something to remember you by. I took your rental car company frequent renter card. I’ll probably add lots of miles to account. When: Aug. 12.

Where: Mellow Mushroom. #1551-0902

NICE SMILE You: Brown hair, thin bearded guy, nice smile, bright eyes, blue “Good” sneaker T-shirt, with friends. Me: Short, thin brunette, blue/white tank, table across yours. Caught your eye, smiled. Like to know you better. Grab a drink? When: Sept. 11. Where: World of Beer Southside. #1561-0916

CAN’T STAND THE HEAT! You made me turkey/cheese sandwich; could listen to Philly accent all night! You loved my dimple; looked as I walked away. Committed to show you how hot a kitchen can get with spicy Latina! When: Aug. 12. Where: Hospital cafeteria. #1549-0902

28 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | NOVEMBER 11-17, 2015

TAURUS (April 20-May 20): You have the answers you need, but you keep sniffing around as if there were different or better answers. Moreover, you’ve been offered blessings to enable you to catalyze greater intimacy, but you’re barely taking advantage of them – apparently because you underestimate their potency. As long as you neglect the gifts you’ve already been granted, they won’t provide full value. If you give them your rapt appreciation, they bloom.

GEMINI (May 21-June 20): Edgar Rice Burroughs (1875-1950) tried to earn a living selling pencil sharpeners, but couldn’t make it. In frustration, he turned to writing novels. Success!

Among his many popular novels, 27 were about the fictional character Tarzan. The actor who played Tarzan in the movies based on Burroughs’ books was Johnny Weissmuller. As a child, he suffered from polio, and rebuilt his strength by becoming a swimmer. He eventually won five Olympic gold medals. Burroughs and Weissmuller are your role models in the weeks ahead. It’s a good time to turn defeat into victory.

CANCER (June 21-July 22): Artist Andy Warhol had an obsession with green underpants. In fact, that’s all he ever wore under his clothes. It may be fun and productive for you to be inspired by his private ritual. Life is virtually conspiring to ripen your libido, stimulate fertility, and expedite growth. Anything you do to encourage these cosmic tendencies could have an unusually dramatic impact. Wearing green undies may be a good place to start, sending a message to your subconscious that you’re ready to bloom.

LEO (July 23-Aug. 22): In the weeks ahead, take special notice of jokes and humorous situations that make you to laugh the loudest.

They’ll provide important clues about parts of your life that need liberation. What outmoded or irrelevant taboos should you consider breaking? What inhibitions dampen your well-being? How might your conscience be overstepping its bounds, making you unnecessarily constrained? When you roar with spontaneous amusement, you’ll know you’ve touched a congested place in your psyche that’s due for a cleansing.

VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22): For each of the last 33 years, the Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Animals in Los Angeles has selected a National Hero Dog. It’s an award given to a canine that’s shown exceptional courage in helping or rescuing people. In 2015, the group departed from tradition, choosing Tara, a female cat, as National Hero Dog. Last May, she saved a four-year-old boy by scaring off a dog that had begun to attack. You’ll soon have an experience like Tara’s. Maybe you’ll make a gutsy move that earns an unexpected honor. Maybe you’ll carry out a dramatic act of compassion that’s widely appreciated. Or you might go outside your comfort zone to perform a noble feat, raising your rep.

LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 22): According to cartoon character Homer Simpson, “Trying is the first step toward failure.” I don’t agree with that comic advice, but this variant is applicable in the weeks ahead: “Trying too hard is the first step toward failure.” Don’t try too hard. Over-

exertion should be taboo. Straining and struggling are unnecessary and counterproductive. If you want to accomplish anything worthwhile, make sure your default emotion is relaxed confidence. Have faith in the momentum generated by previous work you’ve done to get where you are.

SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21): Elsie de Wolfe (1859-1950) was a pioneer in the art of interior design. She described herself as “a rebel in an ugly world.” Early in her career, she vowed, “I’m going to make everything around me beautiful,” and she often did. In part through her influence, the dark, cluttered decor of the Victorian Era, with its bulky draperies and overly ornate furniture, gave way to rooms with brighter light, softer colors, and more inviting textures. Be inspired by her mission. It’s a good time to add extra charm, grace, and comfort to your environments.

SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21): At 36, author Franz Kafka composed a 47page letter to his father Herman. As he described the ways his dad’s toxic narcissism and emotional abuse had skewed his maturation process, he refrained from lashing out with histrionic anger.

Instead, he focused on objectively articulating the facts, recounting events from childhood and analyzing the family dynamic. In accordance with astrological omens, write a letter to your father – even if it’s filled with praise and gratitude instead of complaint. At this juncture in your life story, you especially need insights this exercise generates. Write the letter for your own sake, not with the hope of changing, hurting or pleasing your dad. You don’t have to give it to him.

CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19): Shizo Kanakuri was one of Japan’s top athletes when he competed in the marathon race at the 1912 Stockholm Olympics. Partway through the event, fatigued by sweltering heat, bad food, and the long journey he’d made to get there, Kanakuri passed out. He recovered with the help of a local farmer, but by then the contest was over. Embarrassed by his failure, he sneaked out of Sweden and went home.

Fast-forward to 1966. Producers of a TV show tracked him down and invited him to resume what he’d started. He agreed. At 74, he completed the marathon, finishing with a time of 54 years, eight months. Time to claim your version of this. Wouldn’t you love to resolve a process that was interrupted?

AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18): In most sporting events, there’s never any doubt about which competitor is winning. Each step of the way, the participants and spectators know who has more points, goals or runs. But in a boxing match, no one’s aware of the score until the contest is done – not even the boxers themselves. You’re in a metaphorically comparable situation. You won’t find out the final tally or ultimate decision until the “game” is complete. Given this uncertainty, don’t slack off even a bit. Give your best until the very end.

PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20): One night, as you sleep in bed, you’ll dream of flying through the sunny summer sky. The balmy air will be sweet to breathe. Now and then, you’ll flap your arms like wings, but mostly you glide effortlessly.

The feeling flowing through you will be a blend of exhilaration and ease. Anywhere you want to go, you maneuver skillfully to get there. After a while, you’ll soar to a spot high above a scene that embodies a knotty problem in your waking life. As you hover and gaze down, you get a clear intuition how to untie the knots. Whether or not you remember the dream, you’ll work some practical magic to begin to shrink or dissolve the problem the next day.

Rob Brezsny freewillastrology@freewillastrology.com

CLASSIFIEDS HELP WANTED

ARE YOU AN ENTERTAINER LOOKING FOR A CHANGE OF SCENERY? Have you ever thought about becoming an entertainer and have no experience? Are you fun-loving, hard-working, and do you love to be the life of the party? If you answered yes to any of these questions then we want to meet you!!! We are currently seeking a few ladies to add to our daytime team. We are an Upscale Gentlemen’s Club and Restaurant with a long track record of being the best in Jacksonville. We offer a safe, clean and fun environment where our entertainers can earn up to hundreds of dollars each day. To be considered, please send a current face and body pic along with your résumé to us. Gold Club Jax, goldclubjax@gmail.com.

PHONE ACTRESSES FROM HOME Must have dedicated land line and great voice. 21+. Up to $18 per hour. Flex Hrs./most Wknds. 800-403-7772. Lipservice.net. (AAN CAN) (12-9-15)

HEALTH

CPR CERTIFIED, RESTORATIVE C.N.A. IN P.N. SCHOOL WITH 13 years’ experience, looking to assist with transfer/A.D.L.s, blood pressure, meds, cook meals, toilet & light housekeeping, documentation & tools for vitals provided. $20 for first hour, $15 for each additional hour of home-care. Available M-F 3pm-6am. For info call/text 904-729-3142. (11-25-15) STRUGGLING WITH DRUGS OR ALCOHOL? ADDICTED TO PILLS? Talk to someone who cares. Call The Addiction Hope & Help Line for a free assessment. 800-978-6674. (11-18-15)

VEHICLES WANTED

CASH FOR CARS: Any Car/Truck. Running or not! Top dollar paid. We come to you! Call for Instant Offer: 1-888-420-3808. cash4car.com. (AAN CAN) (12-2-15)

YOUR PORTAL TO REACHING 97,085 READERS WEEKLY HOUSING WANTED

ALL AREAS - ROOMMATES.COM. Lonely? Bored? Broke?

Find the perfect roommate to complement your personality and lifestyle at Roommates.com! (2-3-16)

ADOPTION

PREGNANT? THINKING OF ADOPTION? Talk with caring agency specializing in matching Birthmothers with families nationwide. LIVING EXPENSES PAID. Call 24/7 Abby’s One True Gift Adoptions. 866-413-6293. (AAN CAN) (12-2-15)

ADULT

CURIOUS ABOUT MEN? Talk Discreetly with men like you!

Try FREE! Call 1-888-779-2789. www.guyspyvoice.com.

(AAN CAN) (11-18-15)

MAKE $1,000 WEEKLY!! Mailing brochures from home.

Helping home workers since 2001. Genuine opportunity.

No experience required. Start immediately.

TheWorkingCorner.com. (AAN CAN) (12-2-15) PLANT OPERATOR Material Technologies is seeking an Operator for our facility in the Jacksonville area. Responsibilities include operating plant equipment, material testing and sample collection. greg.moore@boral.com. (11-18-15)

CAREER TRAINING

AIRLINE CAREERS BEGIN HERE – Get started by training as FAA certified Aviation Technician. Financial aid for qualified students. Job placement assistance. Call Aviation Institute of Maintenance, 800-725-1563. (AAN CAN) (12-21-15)

FINANCIAL

ARE YOU IN BIG TROUBLE WITH THE IRS? Stop wage & bank levies, liens & audits, unfiled tax returns, payroll issues, & resolve tax debt FAST. Call 844-753-1317. (AAN CAN) (11/25/15) ATTENTION BUSINESS OWNERS – Get up to $250K of working capital in as little as 24 Hours. (No Startups) – Call 1-800-426-1901. (AAN CAN) (12-2-15)

NOVEMBER 11-17, 2015 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | 29

NEWS OF THE WEIRD

JONESINâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; THE FOLIO WEEKLY CROSSWORD by MATT JONES. Presented by

Overset for the web PONTE VEDRA

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HOLD MY BEER, OFFICER, WHILE I FIND MY LICENSE A 2015 Georgia Supreme Court

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In October, the federal government finally unloaded theproduction two Luthor segment 28 Part of TBS, for short New Hampshire properties it seized in 2007 from dentist 47 Stitches up 71 â&#x20AC;&#x153;All the news thatâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s 2 English school 31 Author Fleming Elaine Brown and her husband (afterprep a nine-month standoff fit to printâ&#x20AC;? initials 49 Outcast 3 Dot on a state map back taxes 33 Tit-tat fi ller following their vow to die rather than pay their 4 High score was a magnet for Solution to â&#x20AC;&#x153;Word Jubileeâ&#x20AC;?

34the â&#x20AC;&#x153;Thatâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s to IRS).soThsweet.â&#x20AC;? eir 100-acre â&#x20AC;&#x153;compoundâ&#x20AC;?

Hall of Lenoâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;srumored The 38 array Emphatic turndown and5tax-resisters, an of â&#x20AC;&#x153;sovereignsâ&#x20AC;? to have (freestyle in action) (11/4/15) Show 42 Glassful at a the cantina, booby-trapped property toTonight ward off law enforcement. ' (was 1 * $ 0 ( 3 2 , 1 7 6 1982 Disney film The perhaps 2015 auction only partially guaranteed the property with a 2010 sequel , 1 8 % $ 6 ( 6 , ; 7 ( ( 1 43 Win all the games free of hidden explosives. The Browns are serving 30-year 7 Anarchy 45 Oregon Ducks prison terms.

0 & * ( 7 3 + 2 1 ( + 2 0 ( 8 â&#x20AC;&#x153;And thatâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s ___ uniform designer 6 1 $ 5 ( 6 : , * * / ( grow onâ&#x20AC;? since 1999 , 1 ( 5 7 ) $ 6 ' 2 & 6 9 Not quite 46 â&#x20AC;&#x153;Lunch is for ___â&#x20AC;?

7 2 7 $ / 5 ( & $ / / 0 8 0 (Wall Street quote)ONE MIL 10 Vannaâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s cohost KNIT ONE, PURL < 2 8 ' 2 < 2 8 $ / $ 48October, Like Goofy not 11Post Make embarrassed In Thbut e Washington and the New York Post 2 3 ( 1 6 2 1 1 $ 1 : 7 6 Pluto reported recent 12 separately episodes government agencies Give a of quick 50 Long meal in Japan?

3 ( 5 , : , * 6 $ 5 $ welcome keeping high-earning employees on the payroll for more 52 LPs, to DJs than a year, with no job assignment, 13 Hard to because climb the agencies 6 , 0 6 ( ( 7 + ( : 2 5 / ' 53 Possesses were unable to adjudicate their misconduct cases. Almost 18 Kidsâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; song refrain + $ $ 6 5 ( 2 2 0 $ + $ 100 shelved Homeland employees turned up thatâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s all vowels 54 Showtime series of Security ' 5 $ 0 $ 6 2 in/a / , ( 6 the 2000sPost Freedom 22 of Information Act request, and Washington PayPal cofounder ) 5 , 7 = 7 + ( & $ 7 $ 6 $ one information technology analyst Musk warehoused by New 59 Little dogâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s bark ) 8 7 8 5 ( 3 / $ 1 6 ' $ 1 York Cityâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s employee pension fund said sheâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; d earned $1.3 25 Cleveland NBAers 61 â&#x20AC;&#x153;___ the Walrusâ&#x20AC;?

1 2â&#x20AC;&#x153;I 3 $ 6 6 , 1 * $ 6 , million over 10 years doing27absolutely Erroneousno work for the city.

62 Marina craft watched movies,â&#x20AC;? said Niki Murphy. â&#x20AC;&#x153;I crocheted â&#x20AC;&#x201D; right in of [supervisors].

â&#x20AC;?

front

â&#x20AC;&#x153;Turn It Downâ&#x20AC;?

HEY, A BEER? OSSHIFER, CAN I BUY YOU

In October, a 20-year-old man in Macomb Township, Michigan, became the most recent alleged drunk driver to

himself in the most awkward reveal of ways: by accidentally swerving into the midst of a sheriff â&#x20AC;&#x2122;s deputiesâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; roadside

â&#x20AC;&#x201D; of another alleged drunk driver. Coincidentally, stop both arrestees are 20 and registered matching 0.17 blood-alcohol readings.

30 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | NOVEMBER 11-17, 2015

decision has created a puzzle for drunk driver enforcement. In Georgia (and other states), blood alcohol tests are â&#x20AC;&#x153;voluntaryâ&#x20AC;? (to bypass the issue of whether drivers can be forced, or even pressured, to endure a test that ultimately helps convict them), but the Georgia court ruled, against custom, that a â&#x20AC;&#x153;consentingâ&#x20AC;? driver might be â&#x20AC;&#x153;tooâ&#x20AC;? drunk to appreciate the consent â&#x20AC;&#x201D; in which case, the test results would be inadmissible in court. Equally awkwardly, prosecutors would be forced to argue that the drunk driver â&#x20AC;&#x201D; too drunk to handle a motor vehicle â&#x20AC;&#x201D; was still sober enough to give knowledgeable consent. In October, Atlantaâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s WSB-TV reported judges statewide are grappling with the issue.

PROP ME UP BESIDE THE JUKEBOX

Funerals and burials, in the U.S. and elsewhere, are no longer somber affairs. Most famously, one man was, according to his instructions, lowered in the ground inside his beloved Cadillac; dressing corpses in fanciful outfits (such as the Green Lantern) has been done. In October, after Mr. Jomar Aguayo Collazo, 23, was killed in a shootout in San Juan, Puerto Rico, the family outfitted his body in his favorite blue tracksuit and propped him up at a table in his motherâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s tavern (â&#x20AC;&#x153;playingâ&#x20AC;? dominoes and holding a drink and a condom) â&#x20AC;&#x201D; as friends and relatives passed by to pay their respects.

JUST DONâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;T FEEL LIKE MYSELF The list of

all-time extreme body modifiers would start with the late Dennis â&#x20AC;&#x153;Stalking Catâ&#x20AC;? Avner (who incrementally cut, chipped, tattooed, pierced and implanted his body to make himself a human feline) and the obsessive Erik â&#x20AC;&#x153;Lizardmanâ&#x20AC;? Sprague, who at one time toured with the Jim Rose Circus. Newer to the scene is Britainâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Ted Richards, 57, working to become a human parrot. With 110 colorful tattoos, 50 piercings and a split tongue, heâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s seeking a surgeon to turn his nose into a beak.

Richard says becoming parrotlike â&#x20AC;&#x153;is the best thing that has happened to me.â&#x20AC;? Londonâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Daily Telegraph, publishing astonishing photos of Richards, asked, rhetorically, whether weâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ve reached â&#x20AC;&#x153;peak plastic surgery.â&#x20AC;?

KNIT ONE, PURL ONE MIL In October,

The Washington Post and the New York Post separately reported recent episodes of government agencies keeping high-earning employees on the payroll for more than a year, with no job assignment, because the agencies were unable to adjudicate their misconduct cases. Almost 100 shelved Homeland Security employees turned up in a Washington Post Freedom of Information Act request, and one information technology analyst warehoused by New York Cityâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s employee pension fund said sheâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;d earned $1.3 million over 10 years doing absolutely no work for the city. â&#x20AC;&#x153;I watched movies,â&#x20AC;? said Niki Murphy. â&#x20AC;&#x153;I crocheted â&#x20AC;&#x201D; right in front of [supervisors].â&#x20AC;?

DUDE, WHEREâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;S MY SNAKE? â&#x20AC;&#x153;Serviceâ&#x20AC;?

animals (mostly guide dogs) have been specially trained to provide help for people with disabilities, but untrained â&#x20AC;&#x153;comfortâ&#x20AC;? animals are also privileged for those diagnosed with panic attacks or depression. In an October report on college students hoping to keep pets in dorms that donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t allow animals, The New York Times noted school officials have entertained student requests for the â&#x20AC;&#x153;comfortâ&#x20AC;? of lizards, potbellied pigs, tarantulas, ferrets, guinea pigs and sugar gliders â&#x20AC;&#x201D; nocturnal, flying, six-ounce Australian marsupials.

Informal Justice Department guidelines only rule out aggressive or destructive animals or ones that trigger allergies.

YOU ARE GETTING SLEEPY â&#x20AC;Ś OOPS

High school principal George Kenney believes he has a gift to aid studentsâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; concentration abilities â&#x20AC;&#x201D; hypnotism â&#x20AC;&#x201D; and practiced it extensively at North Port High in Sarasota, Florida, until 2011, when three students died in separate incidents, two by suicide. Kenney enjoys retirement in North Carolina, but the Sarasota school board didnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t close the chapter until October 2015, when it granted $200,000 settlements to the families of the three students. The lawsuits complained of Kenneyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s unlicensed â&#x20AC;&#x153;medical procedure,â&#x20AC;? which altered the â&#x20AC;&#x153;underdevelopedâ&#x20AC;? teenage brain â&#x20AC;&#x201D; but Kenney had also pointed to improvements in studying by other students.

Chuck Shepherd weirdnews@earthlink.net

NOVEMBER 11-17, 2015 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | 31