12/07/16 Year in Review by Folio Weekly

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THIS WEEK //12.7-12.13.16 // VOL. 29 ISSUE 36 COVER STORY

2016:

[12]

THE YEAR OF HOPE, HATE OR JUST FUBAR? Looking back has never felt SO GOOD STORY BY CLAIRE GOFORTH

SPECIAL SECTION

HOLIDAY GIFT GUIDE [19]

FEATURED ARTICLES FEATURED

TWEETS AND TWITS

[9]

BY A.G. GANCARSKI The TRUMP game plan

THE KIDS ARE NOT ALL RIGHT

[10]

BY JULIE DELEGAL Florida universities STRUGGLE TO MEET DEMAND for mental health care

ETERNAL VIGILANCE OR ETERNAL SLEEP [47] BY MARVIN EDWARDS 75 years after the attack on PEARL HARBOR, WWII veteran reflects on the man who predicted it

COLUMNS + CALENDARS FROM THE EDITOR OUR PICKS MAIL FIGHTIN’ WORDS JAG CITY/CITIMAMA MUSIC

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FILM ARTS LIVE MUSIC CALENDAR DINING DIRECTORY BITE-SIZED PINT-SIZED

21 22 26 38 39 40

CHEFFED-UP PETS CROSSWORD/ASTR0 WEIRD/I SAW U CLASSIFIEDS BACKPAGE

DISTRIBUTION

Bobby Pendexter / cosmicdistributions@gmail.com PUBLISHER • Sam Taylor sam@folioweekly.com / 904.860.2465

EDITORIAL EDITOR • Claire Goforth claire@folioweekly.com / ext. 115 SENIOR EDITOR • Marlene Dryden mdryden@folioweekly.com / ext. 131 A&E EDITOR • Daniel A. Brown dbrown@folioweekly.com / ext. 128 CARTOONIST • Tom Tomorrow CONTRIBUTING WRITERS Rob Brezsny, John E. Citrone, Josue Cruz, Julie Delegal, Susan Cooper Eastman, Marvin Edwards, A.G. Gancarski, Dan Hudak, Shelton Hull, MaryAnn Johanson, Mary Maguire, Keith Marks, Pat McLeod, Nick McGregor, Greg Parlier, Kara Pound, Dale Ratermann, Nikki Sanders, Matthew B. Shaw, Chuck Shepherd, Brentley Stead, Chef Bill Thompson, Marc Wisdom VIDEOGRAPHERS • Doug Lewis, Ron Perry, Carl Rosen

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FROM THE EDITOR JUSTIN BELL DOESN’T LOOK SICK. AS WE sat down at Lutheran Social Services last week, he came across like any other mid-40s professional: well-kept, articulate and healthy. But Bell is sick; he has a deadly disease, one that is preventable, treatable and killing far more people than it should. After very nearly dying in 2007, he was diagnosed with HIV. When he was finally released months later, doctors gave him a 90-day expiration date. When he didn’t die, Bell dedicated his life to advocating for testing, awareness and treatment for the disease that nearly took his life and still might. It’s valuable, important work that our community desperately needs. In 2014, Duval County had the third-highest HIV and AIDS infection rate in the nation. That year, AfricanAmericans accounted for 66 percent of newly reported local cases. But today our community as a whole is not testing for HIV and AIDS (enough), talking about HIV and AIDS (enough) or seriously (enough) trying to prevent HIV and AIDS. According to Bell and others, we’re letting people in our community die in part because of stigma, in part because of fear and in part because we impose our morality on others. It’s this big, ugly bear that lives in our house, but we keep walking past it with our gaze averted, as if by looking away, we can will it into non-existence. We know it doesn’t work that way, but it’s easier to pretend … until it isn’t possible to pretend, until it’s you, or your sister, best friend, lover, child, parent or even grandparent who is diagnosed. Yes, Granny can get HIV from her bridge partner; in the U.S., people ages 55 or older accounted for 17 percent of all new HIV diagnoses in 2014 and 26 percent of all cases in 2013, according to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention.

There are drugs that cannot only prevent the disease from overwhelming the immune system, but also from spreading. According to the CDC, when taken consistently, Pre-Exposure Prophylaxis, or PrEP (brand name Truvada), can reduce the risk of infection among those who are high-risk, such as sex workers, intravenous drug-users and those in sexual relationships with infected persons, by up to 92 percent. If PrEP is coupled with condom usage, the risk of infection can be reduced even more. These drugs don’t do any good if people aren’t taking them. If we want to get serious about stopping the transmission of HIV and AIDS, we could start by making PrEP available to sex workers and intravenous drug-users, who are more likely to contract and spread the disease. Regardless of how we feel about intravenous drug use and prostitution, people will continue injecting drugs and having sex with prostitutes. Is it more moral to let people contract and die from preventable, treatable diseases because we don’t agree with the behaviors that spread the disease or to make drugs that can prevent its spread readily available?

TOO MUCH

IS NEVER

ENOUGH

Northeast Florida has its HEAD IN THE SAND about HIV and AIDS

BELL SAID THAT THE RATE OF INFECTION, AS high as it is in Duval County, is likely even higher than the statistics show because too many people aren’t getting tested because they’re afraid of the stigma and the results. (Alarmingly, among those who haven’t been tested, some also engage in high-risk behaviors, such as intravenous drug use or having unprotected sex with multiple partners.) He wishes for a day when an HIV test is as routine and commonplace as a blood pressure screening. “I wanna know that when you go in for your annual checkup, I wanna know that that primary care provider is running an HIV test on you. That’s not happening,” he said. Bell said that too few doctors realize that they can provide HIV tests without generating paperwork. And, in spite of the fact that medical information is strictly confidential, Bell said that the paper trail fear is keeping many from getting tested and others from getting treated. “The fear that someone is going to see that I’m taking this medication and find out that it’s for HIV,” Bell said, “and that happens often.” Medical science has advanced treatments for HIV and AIDS to the point where a man who is HIV-positive recently said to me, “I will probably not die of AIDS.” And he’s right.

WE’RE ALSO LETTING “MORALITY” GET IN THE way of eradicating HIV and AIDS because we’re not effectively educating young people about the risk, and we’re legislating ignorance disguised as virtue by requiring teachers to promote abstinence to rooms full of kids who are either having sex already or will soon. Does it really make sense to neglect to protect children from disease because it’s uncomfortable, inconvenient or contrary to our preferred reality to admit that 14-yearolds have sex? Well, admit it. Even “wholesome,” “good,” “high-achieving” 14-year-olds have sex. They may not be old enough to drive a car without an adult in the passenger seat, but they’re old enough to get HIV. In fact, the Guttmacher Institute reports that in 2011-’13, 13 percent of females and 18 percent of males had sex before the age of 15. But good luck finding a condom in school. Last week, WJCT reported that Duval County can educate kids about condoms, but it can’t provide them, which makes about as much sense as your dentist talking to you about flossing but letting you leave her office without 60 yards of minty waxed thread when she knows full well that you’re too embarrassed to buy it at the pharmacy. And you can argue until you’re blue in the face that a person who isn’t mature enough to buy condoms isn’t mature enough to have sex: They’re still going to have sex. Would we rather have an epidemic of teen STDs, including HIV, and pregnancies than make condoms available in the one place the vast majority of teens are guaranteed to spend time? Lessons in morality certainly have their place in our homes, schools and churches, but so too does science and facts and reality. And the reality is that kids are getting laid and kids are getting AIDS. People are dying in Northeast Florida because we’re not taking HIV prevention and treatment seriously enough. But it’s not too late to change. Claire Goforth claire@folioweekly.com DECEMBER 7-13, 2016 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | 5

SAT

SWEET STROLL AMELIA ISLAND COOKIE TOUR

Looking for a tasty way to enjoy the holiday season? The Amelia Island Bed and Breakfast Association present their annual Holiday Cookie Tour at six inns in the historic district. Participants sample a signature cookie at each location while soaking up the ambience of seasonal decorations. Horse-drawn carriages are available to transport guests from inn to inn, and trolley service is offered for transportation to the beach. A portion of all proceeds benefits Micah’s Place, which provides prevention and intervention services to victims of domestic violence. Noon-5 p.m. Saturday, Dec. 10, Amelia Island, $25 advance; $30 at the door, $150 VIP (plus shipping and handling/tax includes a midweek stay at your inn of choice and a cookbook). For a full schedule of inns and to purchase tickets, go to ameliaislandinns.com/cookie-tour.

OUR PICKS LITTLE DRUMMER BOYZ IN THE HALL

FOLK IS PEOPLE SECOND SUNDAYS AT STETSON’S

HOLIDAY POPS Do you hear what I hear? No, not

those air raid sirens heralding Trump’s ascendancy as president but rather the return of the annual Holiday Pops concert, with performances by the Jacksonville Symphony and Symphony Chorus, the Douglas Anderson School of the Arts Dancers, and the area’s only guaranteed snowfall. 7:30 p.m. Thursday, Dec. 8; 11 a.m. and 8 p.m. Friday, Dec. 9; 3 and 8 p.m. Saturday, Dec. 10 and 3 p.m. Sunday, Dec. 11, Times-Union Center For The Performing Arts’ Jacoby Symphony Hall, Downtown, $27-$77, jaxsymphony.

REASONS TO LEAVE THE HOUSE THIS WEEK

SUN

This month’s Second Sundays at Stetson’s is presented by the Florida Music Food Initiative, Inc. (FMFI) and features performances by a veritable who’s who of Florida folk with Larry Mangum (pictured), Paul Garfinkel, Emmett Carlisle, Mary Beth Campbell, Al Scortino, and John French. The group performs songs from two CDs released by FMFI, which raises funds to support individuals and families experiencing hunger and homelessness here in Florida. 2 p.m. Dec. 11, Beluthahatchee Park, Cove, 206-8304, $10 suggested donation, nffolk.com.

FRI

WHOLE LOTTA LAUGHS THE COMEDY GET DOWN TOUR

The Comedy Get Down Tour features appearances by humor heavyweights Cedric the Entertainer, D.L. Hughley, George Lopez, Eddie Griffin, and Charlie Murphy. This five-piece posse of funnymen have made their mark in standup and on the little and big screen. Looking for a concert to help your tykes get a good belly laugh? Dear god, don’t bring them to this show! 8 p.m. Friday, Dec. 9, Veterans Memorial Arena, Downtown, $28.50-$88.75, ticketmaster.com.

YOU’VE BEEN HOUSED, SON! SPRINGFIELD HOLIDAY HOME TOUR

THU

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FRI

The 30th annual Historic Springfield Holiday Home Tour invites locals to check out historic (duh) houses in Jacksonville’s oldest neighborhood district. What’s more you get free wassail (whatever that is) and freshly baked cookies! 5-9 p.m. Friday, Dec. 9 and Saturday, Dec. 10, various locations in Springfield, $12 in advance before Dec. 9; $15 after, proceeds benefit Springfield through Springfield Improvement Association and Archives, historicspringfield.org.

DECEMBER 7-13, 2016 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | 7

THE MAIL POINT, COUNTERPOINT

RE.:“When I Paint My Masterpiece,” by Daniel A. Brown, Nov. 16 I’D LIKE TO THANK MR. BROWN AND FOLIO Weekly for covering the international artist mural project held last week, though I did sort of feel like I was breaking my self-imposed Facebook retirement. I have some points of clarification on some comments by Shaun Thurston, who I hope will agree, will always be my friend. The Cultural Council regrets that artists feel rejected and jealous about anything. When you have 30 artists apply for six commissions or grants, 24 are going to have lots of opinions about the call and the selection and the general efficacy of our organization. Rejected is not a good way to feel. Being an artist can be tough anywhere and, like any business, it is really difficult to get off the ground and sustainable. We realize that and we make efforts to assist artists, continually. That said, we would never promise to “nurture” artists or promise opportunities, though we do create many. We do provide professional development in well-attended and well-regarded series of classes from experts in the field. We are featuring a professional development conference on Feb. 25, 2017, in which attendees will be eligible for grants. We did provide opportunities for artists to participate in Creative Capital’s first-ever Blended Learning program, which has spawned multiple projects and collaborations. We did create a Public Art Symposium that featured an artist, who started as a wanted graffiti artist, who found the path to win public art RFP’s and who now is one of the most called-upon public artists in the world. We did grant the largest grant cycle in the history of Jacksonville of $70,000 this year. Those funds all went to local artists and projects, just like the $61,000 and $45,000 the two years before.

We’ve recently committed to further investment in Cultural Fusion and small stipends for CoRK, 700 Union cooperative, and others. We invested in a Cultural Export grant, taking Duval artists to another continent. We also ushered in first-ever grants for diversity and inclusion and access to art for all, to the tune of $60,000 this year and a three-year commitment. We also fought for art in public places outside of the percentage for art programs and have earned nearly $1 million in funding for such and will put art in parts of town that have never seen public art. The common thread in the professional development, the grant-making, and the advocacy we do for artists is that we have to raise ALL THE MONEY to make that happen. We could worry that when an emeritus artist like Thurston says we create zero opportunities, with a laugh, it could end up having a chilling effect on giving, but we don’t. We’re too busy trying to create more opportunities for more art, more culture. Tony Allegretti Executive Director, Cultural Council of Greater Jacksonville via email

IDEOLOGICAL EVOLUTION

RE.:“Punished in Perpetuity,” by Claire Goforth, Nov. 2 THANK YOU FOR PUBLISHING THIS ARTICLE. Lawmakers in Florida need to evolve to the concept of “correction, not punishment.” I agree that all humans should be treated with respect. Human rights, education, and voting rights should be implemented even if they are locked up. Many people serve time as youth (mostly way too much time) and become wonderful productive citizens. Everyone should vote! Shari Riepe via email

LEND YOUR VOICE If you’d like to respond to something you read in the pages of Folio Weekly Magazine, please send an email (with your name, address, and phone number for verification purposes only) to mail@folioweekly.com, visit us at folioweekly.com, or follow us on Twitter or Facebook (@folioweekly) and join the conversation.

BRICKBATS + BOUQUETS BOUQUETS TO FIREFIGHTERS AND WILDLIFE OFFICIALS On Nov. 30, the region and the nation were enraptured by the stunning rescue of Venetia, a 950-lb. female manatee who was caught in a storm drain in the Ortega neighborhood. After many hours’ work, with thousands following along on social media, workers with the Jacksonville Fire & Rescue Department and Florida Fish & Wildlife Conservation Commission freed Venetia, who was then transferred to SeaWorld to be monitored and medically tested before being released into the wild. BRICKBATS TO JAX POLITICOS On Dec. 1, World AIDS Day, the North Florida Quilt Chapter hosted a Quilt Ceremony in Jacksonville City Hall. The genuinely moving, approximately 30-minute event featured panels from the AIDS Memorial Quilt and included speeches, songs and prayers. The only thing that wasn’t on hand was a single local politician — this, in spite of Duval County having one of the highest HIV/AIDS infection rates in the nation and in spite of the event being held mere steps away from many of their offi ces. Way to showcase those priorities. BOUQUETS TO SUPERINTENDENT NIKOLAI VITTI In just one year, six Duval County schools’ grades on their state report cards leapt from F’s to C’s. Though the vast improvements were undoubtedly due to myriad factors, Superintendent Vitti had an undeniable hand in the gains, telling the T-U that he had replaced principals at all the schools in recent years and transferred out teachers at the high-poverty schools who equated impoverishment with academic ability. DO YOU KNOW SOMEONE WHO DESERVES A BOUQUET? HOW ABOUT A BRICKBAT? Send submissions to mail@folioweekly.com; 50 word maximum, concerning a person, place, or topic of local interest. 8 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | DECEMBER 7-13, 2016

FOLIO VOICES : FIGHTIN’ WORDS

LOCAL AND NATIONAL MEDIA MEMBERS ARE developing a routine. They wake up, see the latest wacky tweets or “tweetstorm” from President-elect Donald Trump, and then dutifully write a story on it. We saw it last week — twice. First, Trump tweeted about flag burning — the ultimate in distraction issues, as really it doesn’t affect anyone’s life which malcontent burns a Chinese-made screen— print of our national symbol at this point. Trump opined that possible recourses would include divesting the burner of citizenship or giving that person a “year in jail.” That tweet got a predictable response: lots of handwringing articles about free speech and the First Amendment, and social media feeds flush with fulmination about how it’s the end of the world as we know it, but we don’t feel fine. Meanwhile, half a world away, Israeli jets were strafing Damascus, protected by the Russian military. Despite Al Qaeda being massed on the Israeli border, our most prominent Mideast ally hopped over them to target — again — Hezbollah. No need to talk about that theater in the Global War on Terror. Not when the press spent the morning agog over the flag-burning flap, and the evening deconstructing a picture of Donald Trump (“A Fraud! A Flim Flam Man!”) stealing Willard “Mitt” Romney’s soul over a dinner of frog’s legs. The next day, Trump broke news with a blockbuster pair of tweets, saying that he would relinquish control of his businesses to his progeny, and that he would be calling a press conference this month to discuss it. Off went the scribes to their laptops, to file myriad versions of the same story. And again, Trump managed to move the news cycle from the tedium of policy, such as appointments of cabinet members, to reinforce and burnish the cult of personality. Is media simply duped? Do the members of the press, a smart, cynical lot, not see what’s happening? Doubtful. Media is a capitalistic enterprise. And what members of the press realize is that people would much rather fulminate or effuse about the president-elect than they would deal with the policy details. We learned this bigly. We learned this soon after his election, when “lock her up” became “let her heal.” When the promise to practically repeal Obamacare from the inauguration dais was walked back, changed to “well, we’ll keep the parts that people like.” And when the great,

big, beautiful wall on the Mexican border became a white picket fence. A campaign with more than a year’s worth of hot quotes and intemperate elocutions saw all that intellectual heft flushed, with no or less ceremony than a mass coursing down the pipes from an EverBank Field bathroom in the third quarter of a Jags’ game. Was there outrage from the Trumpenproletariat? No. Just shrugs, an understanding that the campaign was just a performance. Why would it be anything else? The media followed that cue. For as much coverage — live TV hits, tweets of their own, opinion columns about the republic choking on its own vomit in this moment of crisis — as the press granted to Trump’s outrage of the day, the media realized that none of it mattered. It didn’t matter in terms of getting Hillary Clinton elected — and to many members of the press, that was a desired outcome, for a variety of reasons ranging from ideological affinity to “access,” the true coin of the realm. And with that in mind, a recalibration. Minor details — a $20 trillion national debt, the latest rinse cycle from another round of quantitative easing of the money supply, the future of Guantanamo Bay, the actual plans for the Affordable Care Act, what might happen to federalism on the issue of cannabis, and will there be a real response to the opiates members of the ever-growing white underclass keep ODing on — have all been elided in the wake of the cult of personality. Policy taking a back seat to persona is nothing new. We’re becoming more like the rest of the world. More like Russia. More like Turkey. People call it “populism” or “nationalism.” But what those descriptions leave out is that there is something distinctly anti-populist about subverting a process of representative democracy and placing an inordinate amount of faith in a man whose major talent has been working the marks his entire life. Expect more tweets. Before a bombing campaign, maybe Trump will tweet about the dishonest media or some lapsed celebrity from a decade before. Before the next round of QE (quantitative easing), perhaps he’ll critique the latest SNL sketch. When that happens, expect everyone to write it up. And for you, the reader? Expect that you will read multiple versions, perpetuating the revenue model, and proving that Trump’s approach to manipulating the press and the populace is much more rational than we like to pretend. A.G. Gancarski mail@folioweekly.com Twitter/AGGancarski

TWEETS &

TWITS The Trump GAME PLAN

DECEMBER 7-13, 2016 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | 9

JAG CITY

FOLIO VOICES : CITIZEN MAMA

And again, the Jaguars find a NEW WAY to disappoint

THE BIGGEST

NIGHTMARE

Florida universities STRUGGLE TO MEET DEMAND for mental health care

POSSIBLE

THE “PLAYOFF-OR-BUST” 2016 SEASON is spiraling out of control more than Blake Bortles’ passes. After an impressive off-season, in a year in which the division leader sits at 6-6, who would’ve thought we’d be sitting in last place discussing another rebuild? Probably not the fans at EverBank, because they were decked out in orange and still celebrating a (Broncos) Super Bowl win. The bright side? The thousands of Broncos fans at the game on Sunday didn’t even have to leave the stadium to buy their team’s merchandise. They certainly weren’t buying gear for the team whose coach is about to have his third eight-game losing streak in four seasons. Or the team whose quarterback now has more pick-sixes than career wins. The defense continued to dominate on Sunday, and punter Brad Nortman ... any chance he can throw a football and read coverages? He seems more skilled than most of the other units. Interestingly, our defense is ranked fourth in the country, yet we have the third-worst team. I’ve been following football for decades and I can’t remember the last time a top-five defense was on the league’s trash heap. There’s been grumblings that a new coach will be able to get the offense, including Bortles, in check, but how? He can’t read coverage and has more mechanical problems than a 1987 Yugo. Yes, he’s a great guy, but he’s not an NFL quarterback. I can’t imagine a scenario in which head coach Gus Bradley coaches next season, which leads to this question: Does general manager Dave Caldwell also get a pink slip? People seem split on this idea, but we’ve seen where the last rebuild took us. Caldwell had one of the best possible situations for an incoming GM: new owner, massive amount of cap money to spend on players, an entirely new coaching staff and years of high draft picks. What’s more infuriating is watching teams like Oakland pave their way to a playoff berth and possible Super Bowl run. They are a measuring stick for the Jags, having rebuilt at the same time and in a similar way to the Jaguars. I used to hear, “Well, we’re better than the Browns,” or, “At least it’s better than the Blaine Gabbert days.” But it’s not better. Bortles has a near identical record to Gabbert’s. The forever Bortles fans keep bringing up his 2015 season stats, but let’s face it, most of that was garbage time. We finished third out of four in the division last year. That’s not leading, that’s floating the boat. And the boat might be sinking faster than the Browns. Get mad, fans, get angry. Don’t buy into the off-season hopes, or believe that a simple coaching change is going to correct all the problems. Bortles said in his post-game conference after Sunday’s loss that this season has been the “biggest nightmare possible.” How do you think it feels to fans who can barely count on their fingers how many years it’s been since they saw a winning season? Keep loving the Jaguars and wearing your gear to work on losing Monday, but be angry at the scarlet letter that is the team logo. Mark Judson mail@folioweekly.com ____________________________________ Connect with Judson at the Folio Weekly Jag City Facebook page. 10 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | DECEMBER 7-13, 2016

THE KIDS ARE NOT ALL RIGHT THE BOARD OF GOVERNORS FOR FLORIDA’S public state university system is asking for $28.5 million to fund counseling-center and police expansions on their campuses, the Miami Herald reports. Mental health and crime make an unfortunate coupling, particularly because the vast majority of people with mental illnesses are no more likely than non-mentally ill individuals to commit crimes. And yet, in Jacksonville, the pairing persists. The Duval County Jail is the largest provider of mental health services here. Without romanticizing mental illness, it’s good to have a culturally familiar reference point for understanding its impacts. Imagine that John Nash, the brilliant, prize-winning mathematician portrayed in the 2001 movie, A Beautiful Mind, had been born to a less fortunate family. Imagine that Nash, struggling and suffering with his schizophrenia, lived on the streets instead of at Princeton University. Imagine that he selfmedicated with alcohol or opiates, as local woman Melissa Ann Jernigan did in response to her mental illness, according to the Florida Times-Union. Imagine alternately that Nash, who entered graduate school in the 1940s, had been born at a time when he believed the voices he heard were emanating from his mother’s VCR, as local man Henry Sean Harriford did. While Harriford’s family tried to get him help, it didn’t come soon enough to prevent him from killing his mother. If pairing mental illness with public safety is the only way to get political action, so be it. And while Jernigan and Harriford didn’t have their multiple, unrelenting breakdowns on college campuses, college campuses are, nonetheless, places where mental health professionals are educated. Many of them also begin their careers at university counseling centers. Colleges are also places where lots of young adults come of age. And psychologists tell us, it’s that particular developmental time, young adulthood, when many severe mental illnesses emerge. Just ask Rick and Kathy Marquis, who have also shared their story with the T-U. Their son’s first psychotic break occurred after he left home for college. But one of the best reasons for expanding

college counseling centers is that, by taking the strain off their personnel, professors and practitioners are more free to do what universities are good at: educating the rest of the community.

SHORT SUPPLY, INCREASING DEMAND Jacksonville Community Council (JCCI), in its 2014 community-wide inquiry on mental health, reported severe shortages of both psychiatrists and beds available for hospitalbased treatment of mental illnesses. JCCI reported that there is approximately one psychiatrist for every 9,200 adults in Florida, and only seven child psychiatrists for every 100,000 children in Florida. Statistics from the Associated Press illustrate the severity of the shortage of psychiatrists. According to the American Medical Association, the total number of physicians in the U.S. increased by 45 percent from 1995 to 2013, while the number of adult and child psychiatrists rose by only 12 percent, from 43,640 to 49,079. During that span, the U.S. population increased by about 37 percent; meanwhile, millions more Americans have become eligible for mental health coverage under the Affordable Care Act. And there’s evidence that the need for expanded university counseling services for our current cohort of students may be greater than for any previous generation. Counseling center requests have risen tremendously, out of proportion with increases in enrollment. As Kristen M. Clark reported for the Miami Herald in 2015: “Statewide enrollment grew 13 percent — from 297,700 students to 337,750 — between the 2008-’09 and 2013-’14 school years. During that time, counseling centers across the 12 universities saw a 48 percent increase in the number of clients and a 67 percent jump in therapy sessions — mostly spurred by cases of depression, anxiety and academicrelated stress.” If high school surveys are any indication, that demand is not going to abate anytime soon. Duval County data show that 27 percent of all middle school students and 19.7 percent of all high school students have seriously considered attempting suicide.

The local rise in teen depression mirrors a national trend. Susanna Schrobsdorff, writing for Time, cites the journal Pediatrics in noting that, over the nine-year period that ended in 2014, the number of teens diagnosed with Major Depressive Disorder (MDE) increased 37 percent.

“CODDLING,” IN CONTEXT Schrobsdorff ’s research attributes the increase in child and adolescent depression to a few familiar factors. Parents like me will tell you that we’ve tried to raise our millennials in a culture of compassion, awareness and acceptance of individual differences. But we’ve had to do it in the wake of Sept. 11, over the course of the War on Terror, against the background of innumerable school shootings, and amid the perspectiveless and unrelenting world of social media. In our hyper-connected culture that makes every horror feel like it’s right around the corner, we don’t let our children ride their bikes all over town like our own parents let us do. Hell, we don’t even like them to be outside after dark. And if they are, they’d better answer their texts. Dr. Sarah Ravin, a Coral Gables psychologist, says the stressors of Sept. 11 resonate with her. Mere weeks into their Ph.D. training, Ravin and her classmates at American University were called to duty during the immediate aftermath of the 9/11 attacks because demands for mental health services were so high. Today, 90 percent of her practice comprises adolescent and young adult patients. “With very good intentions,” Ravin writes in an email interview with Folio Weekly, “parents and teachers and other adults have shielded these kids from disappointment, failure, stress, responsibility and many of the realities of life that previous generations knew … . “We have a generation of students who tend to be less resilient, but are entering adulthood in a world that feels much more threatening.” THE AGE OF ANXIETY As if the stressors of our new century and parental attempts to insulate their children

weren’t enough, there are a host of other mental health risk factors for today’s college students. The biggest risk factor, as John Nash exemplified, is age. “Many mental illnesses, including mood disorders, eating disorders, psychotic disorders, and substance abuse disorders, often first manifest in late adolescence or early adulthood,” Ravin writes, “which is precisely the age of the typical college student.” Ravin notes that the transition of leaving the family home can be an additional stressor, as can increased social, financial and academic pressures. And any of these stressors, she observes, could “trigger or exacerbate mental health problems, especially in those who are genetically vulnerable.” “Once the safety and structure of home, family and high school are removed,” Ravin notes, “psychiatric problems have more room to blossom.” And there’s even more bad news waiting for students when they arrive on campus, Ravin says. Just when they’re starting to learn to take care of themselves as young adults, they show up at a place where terrible habits are the norm, not the exception. “Lifestyle factors,” she adds, “such as nutrition, sleep, social support, physical activity, alcohol and drug use, and daily stress have a profound influence on our mental health, for better or for worse.” WE HAVE THE TECHNOLOGY … The good news is, we no longer live in the harsh, mid-20th-century world of John Nash, when treatments for his mental illness included barbaric rounds of insulin shock therapy, a type of therapy in which large doses of insulin are repeatedly injected to produce daily comas, and first-generation anti-psychotics, which had harsh side effects. Myriad anti-depressants have been developed since then, too. But the best news, Ravin emphasizes, is how science has enhanced therapy treatments for better outcomes: “[N]ew findings from neuroscience show that our brains have the capacity for resilience … .” A proponent and practitioner of Cognitive Behavioral Therapy, Ravin notes that CBT and other methods have been scientifically validated, while therapy approaches employed during the last century often relied on speculative theories. CBT helps the individual understand how their thoughts, behaviors and emotions all affect each other. Practitioners help their clients develop more adaptive behavior patterns, and better ways of coping with distressing thoughts and emotions. “CBT is an effective treatment for college students with anxiety disorders, depression, insomnia, OCD, body-dysmorphic disorder, bulimia nervosa and binge-eating disorder, among other conditions,” Ravin writes. “Mental health is influenced by hundreds, if not thousands, of variables,” she adds. “Some of these variables — such as genetic makeup, temperament, and the occurrence of certain life stressors — are outside of our control.” But, Ravin insists, “ … We all have the capacity to rewire our brains and improve our mental health. We just need help learning how to do it.” INDUSTRY STANDARDS The International Association of Counseling Services recommends that university campuses provide one counselor for every 1,000-1,500 students. Statewide, Florida’s public universities are short by 137 counselors, according to the Miami Herald. Using the more conservative

ratio, that’s at least 137,000 students who need services but aren’t getting them. IACS emphasizes that this number is a moving target, and that the more we shortchange our students now, the greater the likelihood that the ratio will have to be reduced during future revisions. That’s because, as waiting lists grow, and students wait for or give up on mental health care, emotional problems can become more entrenched, and symptoms of psychiatric disorders can worsen. So, when students eventually do see a counselor, they will need

“With very good intentions, parents and teachers and other adults have SHIELDED THESE KIDS from disappointment, failure, stress, responsibility and many of the realities of life that previous generations knew,” says Dr. Sarah Ravin. “We have a generation of students who TEND TO BE LESS RESILIENT, but are entering adulthood in a world that feels much more threatening.” more practitioner time to resolve mental health crises that might have otherwise been averted. Counselor deficits also put students at increased risk for academic failure, according to IACS, and put centers and universities at greater risk for lawsuits. It also strains the university’s mission to assist the community through training and outreach. THE $14.5 MILLION PROPOSAL A little more than half of the public safety/ mental health bill that Florida’s Board of Governors is proposing would go to fill the state universities’ counseling center deficits. As the needs get met, waiting lists should decrease or disappear, which would in turn help limit the severity of student crises, support academic success, limit liability for universities, and free up practitioner and educator time to do what they do best: help communities. For a state that ranks 49th in its mental health expenditures, Florida’s public universities are a good place to start reversing that record. If we’re going to model resilience for the next generation, while we’re at it, let’s help them find their own. Julie Delegal mail@folioweekly.com @JulieinJax DECEMBER 7-13, 2016 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | 11

THE YEAR OF HOPE, HATE OR JUST FUBAR?

STORY BY CLAIRE GOFORTH

TART TO (ALMOST) FINISH, THIS YEAR HAS BEEN A WILD RIDE. Hope, hate, snarky GIFs and all things great and deplorable have flowed from the far corners of the Earth and the interwebs as 2016 brought us together and tore us apart. We’ve been enraptured by the Mannequin Challenge, perhaps more fittingly known as flash mobs for the extremely sedentary, and hid out in the safe spaces (echo chambers) of our Facebook pages. We’ve bled, we’ve survived, and much of what we thought we knew has changed — time will tell whether for the better. As twilight wans on one of the most dramatic and divisive years in living memory, let’s reflect on 2016’s highs, lows and WTAFs, the stuff that dreams, nightmares and Twitter wars are made of. Locally, the first sign that 2016 would be more ‘divide and conquer’ than ‘united we stand’ came minutes after we rang in the New Year. Michael Davis was murdered in Jacksonville at 10 past midnight on Jan. 1, signaling the beginning of what has been a bloodbath of a year. As of this writing, there have been 109 homicides in Duval County, putting us on track to have the highest homicide count since 2008. 12 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | DECEMBER 7-13, 2016

If the bloody beginning didn’t signal trouble brewing, this did: On Jan. 4, federal agents served 12-term U.S. Congresswoman Corrine Brown a subpoena as she dined on barbecue at a local restaurant. That saucy subpoena launched a cavalcade of scandalous stories that culminated with Brown’s criminal indictment on federal conspiracy and fraud charges in July. After decades of narrow escapes, this time, Brown got delivered. The much-loved and muchloathed congresswoman lost her primary to Tallahassee Democrat Al Lawson on Aug. 30, signaling the end of an era in which Northeast Florida has an experienced congressperson in Washington. (ICYMI: Ander Crenshaw retired; former Jax Sheriff John Rutherford won the Republican primary against Hans “Rawhide” Tanzler and went on to topple David “The Underdog” Bruderly in the general election. Mr. Sheriff is going to Washington.) In February, the long-awaited and much-hoped-for second attempt to amend

Jacksonville’s human rights ordinance to protect citizens from housing, employment and public accommodation discrimination on the basis of sexual orientation, gender identity and expression failed. Some blamed councilpersons who went back on campaign pledges to support it; others blamed Mayor Lenny Curry pulling their strings behind the scenes (“The Mayor Has Two Faces,” Folio Weekly, Feb. 17). Regardless of who deserved the most blame, the outcome was the same: It remains legal to discriminate against people based on who they boink and what they wear. May freedom to discriminate ring. In spring, Eureka Garden Apartments became the center of local attention when pale, shaking local politicians visited the complex and learned what poverty in America really looks like. Subsequently pols up the food chain noticed how well that storyline played out, and jumped in the

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THE YEAR OF HOPE, HATE

OR JUST FUBAR?

<<< FROM PREVIOUS

DEREK KINNER (1959-2016)

hen Derek Kinner passed away from lung and brain cancer this past April 2, mere days after his 57th birthday, Northeast Florida lost one of its more potent voices in journalism. For more than three decades, Kenner was relentless in covering the stories that many of his peers would not touch. He was hired as a reporter three times for The Florida Times-Union, and in 1986 was nominated for the Pulitzer Prize for Public Service after chronicling stories of torture in Panama City’s Jackson County Jail. Kinner went on to write a series of equally in-depth stories for Folio Weekly, including a piece chronicling the 2014 shooting between two bike gangs at Nippers Beach Grille in Jacksonville Beach, a crime mired in conspiracy. The Atlanta native was as colorful as the stories he pursued. Kinner dropped out of school at the age of 15, but, armed with only his GED, his persistence to write and his inherent skills overshadowed his lack of academic creds. With his long hair pulled back into a ponytail, his beard, and ubiquitous cigarette in hand, Kinner resembled a member of the Allman Brothers Band more than a suit-and-tie beat reporter. During his illness, Kinner wrote candidly about the experience on his Facebook page. On one of his final FB posts from March 16, Kinner wrote, “Every sunrise is different. And I love them all,” a fittingly stoic observation from a man who’d spent most of his life chronicling what he, and others, had seen, with his distinctive perceptions and insights.

14 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | DECEMBER 7-13, 2016

game, bringing more cameras and the best outrage courting votes can buy. The saga culminated with Eureka Garden Apartments actual heroine Tracy Grant testifying on Capitol Hill about the appalling conditions at the complex and shady-with-a-side-ofsleaze conduct of owner Global Ministries Foundation. Unsurprisingly, GMF soon put Eureka and its other Jacksonville-based Section 8 apartment complexes up for sale. In September, Cleveland, Ohio-based for-profit company Millennia Housing Management stepped in to take the complex off GMF’s greedy hands. Curiously, since the impending sale was announced, not much seems to have happened. But, then again, election season is over. In June, Northeast Florida and the nation mourned a terrible tragedy that struck just southwest of us: 49 innocents murdered by a lone gunman at the popular gay club Pulse Orlando. June 12 will be remembered as the day the rainbow went black.

ll year, folks in Nassau County have been scratching their heads over the county’s surprising contortionism to pave the way for Rayonier to clear 24,000 acres, add 46,000 residents and create an independent development “stewardship” district (“Road to Ruin,” Folio Weekly, April 27). Seems some folks thought that part of the charm of Northeast Florida’s upper-righthand-corner was that small town vibe. (Word in Toon Town is that they’ve even got their own strain of Dirty ’Dina chlamydia! OK, not really.) But, then again, you can fund capitol improvements and city services with property tax dollars; charm, not so much. Speaking of charm: soon-to-be-former State Attorney Angela Corey. In June, we broke a story that Corey had possibly knowingly withheld potentially exculpatory evidence about the previous medical examiner’s dementia on the job, evidence that could affect dozens — or more — of homicide verdicts (“Truth, Justice or the Angela Corey Way,” June 22). This launched another in a series of media firestorms related to Corey, which continued through a summer in

which she and harbinger-of-death-penalties Bernie de la Rionda were slammed by the Harvard Law School’s Fair Punishment Project, The National Review, The New York Times Magazine and The Nation whose story title said it all, “Is Angela Corey the Cruelest Prosecutor in America?” In August, Corey lost the primary to Melissa Nelson. Elsewhere, third challenger Wes White slipped quietly into that good night. Also slinking away come 2017 is Public Defender Matt Shirk, who lost his primary to Charlie Cofer. Where will Shirk pop up next? Smart money’s on belly-up to a bar in Anywhere But Jacksonville, where he will slam Angry Balls and plot his comeback tour. Over the summer, the race to be the next sheriff in Clay County became something like watching telenovelas on Telemundo. Opposition to Craig Aldrich’s candidacy was, to put it mildly, passionate. Someone even went so far as to mail thousands of households in Clay a copy of “Strip Search,” our June 20 story about Aldrich’s alleged visit to a Tampaarea strip club in a patrol car. In the end, the

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MOORE’S SCHOOL of KNOWLEDGE by JEVORIES MOORE

FACTS & REFLECTIONS on a JOKE of a YEAR Some lady on The Price is Right just won a brand-new 2016 Epi-Pen.

dad, tell me about 2016.

OK, hold on a sec.

“Bae” is the Axe Body Spray of words. You people drinking 9 percent beers know about liquor, right? I wonder if puppies get on Snapchat and use the 38-year-old woman filter?

it all started with this f*cking gorilla...

“Latte” is Latin for: You paid too much for that coffee. Captain America outsources his crime-fighting to Captain India. Taking pictures with an iPad is the new fanny pack. “Hey, aren’t you that guy from Facebook?” said nobody, ever. White people will drive with the windows down on a safari surrounded by lions but lock the car doors when a black guy walks by.

The golden era of television was when it didn’t cost $150 a month to watch it.

Carrot raisin salad: When you want to eat something horrible, three times.

There aren’t nearly as many people stopping me at traffic lights to ask if I have any Grey Poupon as I thought there would be growing up.

Fun Fact: If you answer your phone, “Christ speaking,” 70 percent of callers will hang up on you. You’re welcome.

After 50 years of failed embargoes and isolation, the U.S. is about to unleash its most obnoxious weapon on Cuba to date … the American tourist. Going to McDonald’s for a salad is like going to a hooker for a kiss on the cheek.

DECEMBER 7-13, 2016 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | 15

THE YEAR OF HOPE, HATE

OR JUST FUBAR? <<< FROM PREVIOUS

TOM McCLEERY (1942-2016)

om McCleery and his romantic and professional partner

Gunnel Humphreys opened Edge City in 1976, laying the foundation for Five Points blooming into its current-day, vibrant countercultural hub. Frustrated with a career in sales, McCleery had recently quit his day gig when he and Humphreys paid $3,000 to buy a former

opposition got what it wanted: incoming Clay County Sheriff Darryl Daniels. August brought us the Rio de Janeiro Olympics, a much-needed salve for the festering 2016 narrative. It was a big, festive splash of medals and world records, with former The Bolles School swimmers Joseph Schooling, Ryan Murphy and Caeleb Dressel bringing home medals and doing Northeast Florida proud, and Michael Phelps gallivanting around the pool in Speedos (delicious in any language) … Then we all got a nice dose of an embarrassing, but amusing, international incident when another Olympic swimmer, Ryan Lochte, told his momma and the press that he was the victim of an armed robbery. It later turned out that he and three other blotto Olympians (none from Northeast Florida, praise be) had actually vandalized a gas station and pissed all over the place. For penance, Lochte had to pop wood on Dancing With the Stars. No, really. Google it. Also in August, Jacksonville Mayor Lenny Curry put his political capitol to the

test with a voter referendum on the half-cent sales tax to fund Jacksonville’s burgeoning pension debt. In spite of a late-round rally to oppose it by Duval Democrats who finally found that fire in their belly, the tax passed with flying colors.

s summer gave way to the season we call fall but feels almost exactly like summer (see also: spring), and the presidential election heated up to a white hot blaze (pun intended), Northeast Florida became the center of the political universe. From Donald Trump to Bill Clinton to Donald Trump (again) to President Barack Obama to Bill Clinton (again), scarcely a week went by without a current, former or wannabe president coming to town. The only thing missing was Bush. Oh, and Hillary. Like Lochte, Northeast Florida has rarely been so engorged on the national stage. In the midst of all the political brew-haha/they’re-coming-to-take-me-away-pleasegod, we got hit by the first hurricane in the almost 20 years since Hurricane Floyd tore up Jacksonville Beach’s ass with whirling dervishes — that is, tropical cyclones. On

Oct. 7, Hurricane Matthew showed Northeast Florida that he did not play, ripping up the coast from St. Augustine, which took the hardest hit locally, to Fernandina. Other than a few rumors of profiteers, after the storm displaced friends and neighbors and wrecked scores of homes and businesses, St. Augustinians showed the region what community means, rallying together in truly inspiring fashion (“Aftermath of the Storm,” Folio Weekly, Oct. 12). Meanwhile, in Jacksonville, the biggest storm story unfolded in the darkness that remained for hours, then days, after JEA’s self-imposed pipe dream of a deadline to restore power. As tens of thousands waited for electricity, city officials did everything they could to stoke the flames of dissent against the utility, which was every bit as helpful as you might imagine (read: not helpful at all). Just before the election wave crashed on our heads, the owners of The Florida Times-Union did the rest of the print media a favor by unilaterally deciding to endorse Trump, bringing the grand total of papers to endorse him to three: the KKK newspaper, that rag Sheldon Adelson owns and our daily local birdcage liner, which

MOORE’S SCHOOL of KNOWLEDGE by JEVORIES MOORE

ABOUT that ELECTION …

head shop, with the plan of transforming it into a boutique for fashionable threads and punk rock gear, which eventually outfitted generations of artists, rockers and proud outcasts in Northeast Florida. The shop also became a de facto meeting place

2016: No way will Trump win the election

2017: No way will President 2018: No way we’re doing Trump fire all those nukes what those apes say!

for folks who felt ostracized from the overall conservative vibe of the city. Eventually known as “The Patron Saint of Five Points,” McCleery has left a legacy — that so-called “drop outs” can find freedom for themselves, and offers the possibility of that very same freedom for others’ innate self-expression while affecting positive, creative changes for community.

16 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | DECEMBER 7-13, 2016

The 2016 election may have divided us, but at least we all still agree that Kim Kardashian is a worthless piece of shit.

CASTRO: I will not die until America is destroyed. TRUMP: I’m gonna be the president. CASTRO: Well, then.

So we’ve had white presidents, a black president and now an orange one. I’m crossing my fingers for The Hulk next time around.

2016: Trump elected 2018: Border wall completed 2020: Mexico takes gold, silver and bronze in pole vault at the summer Olympics

Now that Trump has been elected, there will be a TV show called “Orange is the New Barack.”

Don’t worry, Donald Trump will declare bankruptcy and start a new country.

Let’s give Trump a chance! [CUT TO: Six months rom now … ] CNN: It is now day five of the war with Australia … for some goddamn reason. The fact that there’s something called a Mannequin Challenge scares me more than a Trump presidency. Somewhere, Bill Clinton is ripping up his list of bangable interns.

You know one of those White House bathrooms will soon be a tanning booth. I come from an evil universe where Robin Williams and David Bowie are dead, Bill Cosby is a serial rapist and Donald Trump is president. Monica Lewinsky said she wouldn’t vote for Hillary. Apparently, the last Clinton president left a bad taste in her mouth.

<<< FROM PREVIOUS is not to be confused with this, our weekly local kindling. Word is hundreds reacted by canceling their subscriptions. Then, finally, after the longest campaign in living memory, Nov. 8 came and went, leaving behind president-elect Trump and a likely end of the Clinton era in national politics — at least until Chelsea is old enough to run for president. What? She’s old enough now? Better save those Clinton for President stickers for 2020, folks, and hope that Hill-dawg’s daughter doesn’t know how to use email. Following Trump’s victory, locals reacted with a few abhorrent incidents involving swastikas and other racist effigies, but — other than on social media, which was filled with epic ideological battles, comment threads in the hundreds and mass unfriendings in the days after the election — people were by and large peaceful, even respectful, of one another, giving at least some of us hope for the future. In other happy election news, Floridians voted against a contentious solar ballot initiative funded by big energy and, drumroll please, FINALLY LEGALIZED MEDICAL MARIJUANA!! Oh, happy, happy day! Going to grandma’s house just got a whole lot sweeter. And then the Gold Club burnt the hell up and ruined everything. At least for one news cycle, cause days later, the nation was captivated by the rescue of a manatee from a storm drain in the Ortega ’hood. The 950-pound female that neighborhood kids named Venetia was then transported to SeaWorld — temporarily! #ByeVenetia — for medical attention, and News4Jax reports that she had a few abrasions but is expected to make a speedy and full recovery. Less than 24 hours after Venetia captured our hearts, another local animal became an unexpected sort of celebrity when his owner decided that “Take Your Dog To Work Day” included allegedly robbing banks and taking hostages. On Dec. 1, 13 people were held hostage at the Community First Credit Union on the 1600 block of Edgewood Avenue West. The hostages were rescued unharmed, the suspect, 23-year-old Nicholas Humphrey, was taken into custody and the dog was uninjured. Lest we forget sports, though some season ticketholders probably wish they could, the Jaguars stank — again — the Suns became the Jumbo Shrimp (no one is sure if they should be boiled or fried), the Giants kicked serious ass and the Armada, well, there’s always next year. Well, there you have it, 2016 in a nutsack. Claire Goforth claire@folioweekly.com

THE JACKSONVILLE SUNS (1962-2016)

hat’s in a name? When the

Jacksonville Suns’ new owner Ken Babby decided to change the team’s name to the Jacksonville Jumbo Shrimp, an almost surprising amount of outrage simmered up from the local community (as chronicled in our Nov. 9 cover feature, “Hardcore Prawn”). Granted, changing the name of the team from its former neo-Apollonian-tinged appellation (which quite frankly evoked more visions of the sometimes-punishing local heat than an ancient Greek and Roman sun god), to that of a miniature crustacean, seemed like an odd curveball to throw at local sports fans. Eventually the furor over the name change died down, surely from the realization that the game-changer-of-name won’t negatively affect our championship-winning ball team that’s a part of Jacksonville as much as the St. Johns River, Lynyrd Skynyrd and, that’s

right, Folio Weekly. DECEMBER 7-13, 2016 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | 17

THE JACKSONVILLE SUNS (1962-2016)

hat’s in a name? When the

18 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | DECEMBER 7-13, 2016

LIVE LOCAL. SHOP LOCAL. THESE ARE MORE THAN WORDS, THEY’RE THE GUIDING PRINCIPLE BEHIND EVERYTHING WE DO AT FOLIO WEEKLY. WE’RE SO LOCAL, WE’RE HYPER-LOCAL. TURN THE PAGE TO OUR 2016 GIFT GUIDE AND FIND OUT ABOUT THE VERY THAT YOUR — AND OUR — COMMUNITY HAS TO OFFER.

DECEMBER 7-13, 2016 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | 19

FOLIO A + E

he Fixx had some awful, awful music videos. To wit, at about the 46-second mark of the one for the band’s biggest hit, “One Thing Leads to Another,” there’s a shot of two dogs rubbing noses. They’re back later on, running down a corridor and barking, and then there’s a geisha girl and a guy scrubbing some arrow graffiti off a wall, and then at the end of the video, the band is fighting through some sort of ticker-tape wind storm, because why wouldn’t they be? Please, please go to this Wikipedia page and read the description for the music video (en.wikipedia.org/wiki/ One_Thing_Leads_to_Another) and then come back and continue reading this. I’ll wait for you. OK, I didn’t realize this was all happening in another dimension. Maybe I misunderstood the lyrics. Other videos, such as those for “Red Skies” and “Saved By Zero” have more of a plot, but are also rather bad. “Secret Separation” is particular scary. Luckily for frontman Cy Curnin and the rest of the band, time marches on, and children of the ’80s (today’s 40-somethings) love the videos and, more important, the music. Founded in 1979 (originally as the Portraits), despite, or maybe because of (?) those videos, the band had some quite successful years in the ’80s,

THE FIXX with URSULA

8 p.m. Dec. 10, Jack Rabbits, San Marco, $20, jaxlive.com

20 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | DECEMBER 7-13, 2016

charting high with “One Thing Leads to Another” and “Stand or Fall.” 1983’s Reach the Beach was certified platinum. The band was awash in New Wave neon, jackets with giant shoulder pads and enough extra cash to afford to rent two Doberman pinschers for a day to film a video. Probably the most important thing that happened to the Fixx in the ’80s was the addition of bassist Dan K. Brown. Dan Brown is also the name of my editor, and I truly, truly hope that somehow this is the same Dan Brown [A&E Editor’s note: Sorry, Danny; it is not. I’m the other-real-cool-dude bassist who played with Royal Trux.] The Fixx rode the New Wave well into the ’80s with more hits like the aforementioned “Secret Separation” and exposure through multiple mediums. Their music was featured in movies like Fletch and Desperately Seeking Susan

FILM End-of-the-World Flicks ARTS Garrison Keillor MUSIC Pierce Pettis LIVE + LOCAL MUSIC CALENDAR

and the actually great Streets of Fire. Fixx music was also heard on Miami Vice, a quintessential ’80s TV treasure. More recently, you may remember hearing “Saved by Zero” on an episode of Breaking Bad or the hit “One Thing Leads …” on the radio station in the video game Grand Theft Auto: Vice City as you drove around destroying humanity. When compared to contemporaries, the Fixx have been more successful commercially than many others. Platinum albums, top-five hits and the ability to tour for more than 30 years usually add up to some level of financial stability. And the group isn’t to be ignored critically, either. In a decade known for greed and consumption, the Fixx put out socially conscious songs and contrasted socially or politically motivated lyrics with what has become the epitome New Wave sound, à la “One Thing Leads to Another.” It would be

JUST ONE

FIXX

’80s UK NEW WAVE KINGS boast the same lineup and same stellar songs from their impressive career

PG. 21 PG. 22 PG. 25 PG. 26

unfair to judge the musicians for being on a package bill with other bands from that decade, who may have been one-hit wonders, as simply milking the little bit of success they may have had, because they had at least their fair share. Although success slowed down a bit for the Fixx in the ’90s and beyond, they have continued to put out music and tour extensively. Despite the success and weird videos, probably the most amazing accomplishment is that, for the most part, the original line up still tours. Typically, if you go see an ’80s band (or a ’90s band, for that matter) you are probably catching, at most, 75 percent of the guys who were in the room when the hit songs were written. Not so with the Fixx. From a little research into their recent endeavors, it looks like we’re in luck. They sound good. Though lead vocalist Cy Curnin moves a little less and his hair is less angular, he still has the chops and still sounds like the guy on the records. He may not look like a cross between ’80s Paul Weller and ’80s George Michael anymore, but his vocals are spot on. To see an act that sold (I’m guessing here) close to a million albums in a setting as intimate as Jack Rabbits is a rarity, so dust off your skinny tie, break out your hairspray spazzoids and resurrect those cheap sneakers. Danny Kelly mail@folioweekly.com

FOLIO A+E : MAGIC LANTERNS

ANNIHILATION

CELEBRATION

A trifecta of END-OF-THE-WORLD flicks for the end of the year

ecuperating from Thanksgiving (during which I ate too much) and preparing for Christmas (probably more of the same), I decided to check out three recent postapocalyptic films. It’s not typical holiday fare, I know, but already the seasonal tunes by The Carpenters and the like are beginning to get on my nerves. Time for a little doomsday. As it turns out, all three movies are better than average for their type, well-made if not particularly original and well worth a look by fans of the genre. The Day (2011), written by Luke Passmore and directed by Doug Aarniokoski, is a conscious riff on Cormac McCarthy’s The Road. Utilizing only a few snatches of vivid color in some flashbacks, the film is black-and-white for most of its running time, befitting the tone and setting. Five companions — three guys and two girls — trudge down a road over the credits, recalling the father and son’s endless odyssey in The Road as well as Rick and the gang’s trek in The Walking Dead. There’s no explanation why the world has gone to hell, but food is the prime commodity in demand. Holing up in an isolated farmhouse, the few survivors think at first they’ve hit the jackpot, only to discover that they’ve merely taken the bait. There are others out there who are hungry as well. While its initial premise is derived from The Road, the second half of The Day draws directly on Night of the Living Dead and Straw Dogs as the dwindling handful struggle to survive the siege. Though the filmmakers originally planned to go the zombie route, they wisely decided to make the besiegers ordinary (?) cannibals, which made them even more terrifying, particularly since their leader is a doting father trying to provide for his two kids. And boy, are they creepy! The cast of good guys includes Shawn Ashmore (Iceman in the last X-Men movie) and Shannyn Sossamon of TV’s Wayward Pines and Sleepy Hollow. The most complex and interesting of the group (a real badass to have on your side) is played by Ashley Bell of The Last Exorcism. Despite the familiar set-up and general character types, The Day is wellcrafted, saving its biggest surprise for the end. Home to some of the most innovative filmmakers of the day, Denmark can now brag on its first post-apocalyptic zombie flick in What We Become (2015), written and directed by Bo Mikkelsen. For American viewers, the film unfolds like the opening episodes of Fear the Walking Dead. The focus is on the inhabitants of a middle-class Danish suburb who suddenly find themselves quarantined by the government in an effort to halt a terrifying new disease that kills its victims, then resurrects them as flesh-eating zombies. Yes, it’s familiar, but What We Become is anything but trite, due largely to Mikkelsen’s direction and the appeal of Benjamin Engell and Ella Solgaard as the teens who discover

one another just as their world becomes a nightmare. We’ve seen it all before, but the basic premise is still compelling. How would ordinary people react when everything and everyone they trusted (including the government) becomes a deadly enemy? What we could become in such a situation is quite scary, whether the monsters are make-believe zombies or real-life Nazis. The Danes should know. Fans of Netflix’s hit series Stranger Things will definitely want to check out Hidden, the third film in this post-apocalyptic trilogy. Written and directed by the Duffer Brothers in 2012, the movie finally found limited release in 2015. But by then, M. Night Shyamalan had read the script and on that basis hired the brothers to write and produce some of the episodes for Fox’s Wayward Pines. Utilizing their television experience, the Duffers conceived Stranger Things, which was picked up by Netflix and became a surprise hit — Season Two is scheduled to air this summer. Featuring only three characters, Hidden takes place mostly in an underground shelter where a family has remained secluded after some kind of catastrophic event has made life above ground lethal for them. For more than a year, the father Ray (Alexander Skarsgård), mother Claire (Andrea Riseborough) and their young daughter Zoe (Emily Alyn Lind) have tried to maintain a semblance of normality, always in fear of predators above. Eventually, though, a series of accidents forces the family’s emergence. Though not as good as the similarly themed 10 Cloverfield Lane, for a first movie Hidden is still effective, creating a palpable sense of dread and suspense about the nature of the threat aboveground. The originality is mostly plotgenerated with the real payoff coming in the genuinely surprising twist finale. I offer you these three alternatives to yet another rerun of It’s a Wonderful Life. If you are so inclined — for stranger things, that is. Pat McLeod mail@folioweekly.com

NOWSHOWING SUN-RAY CINEMA Fantastic Beasts & Where to Find Them, Moonlight, The Handmaiden and A Man Called Ove run, 1028 Park St., 359-0049, sunraycinema. com. The Love Witch and Manchester by the Sea start Dec. 9. CORAZON CINEMA & CAFÉ Captain Fantastic is running. 36 Granada St., St. Augustine, 679-5736, corazoncinemaandcafe.com. Miracle on 34th Street shows 2 and 6:45 p.m. Dec. 7. TBT shows Trains, Planes & Automobiles, noon Dec. 8. Green Film: Just Eat It, Racing to Zero 6 p.m. Dec. 8. A Most Dangerous Game runs 8 p.m. Dec. 8 for Cult Thursday. Anthropoid and Scrooge (1935) start Dec. 9. IMAX THEATER Fantastic Beasts & Where to Find Them, The Polar Express, America Wild: National Parks Adventure, A Beautiful Planet, Extreme Weather and Secret Ocean screen at World Golf Village IMAX Theater, St. Augustine, 940-4133, worldgolfimax.com. Rogue One: A Star Wars Story IMAX 3D starts Dec. 15. DECEMBER 7-13, 2016 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | 21

FOLIO A+E : ARTS

AMERICAN

arrison Keillor is not afraid to speak his mind. Whether on the radio airwaves, in print or in person, Keillor has offered a winning blend of humor, social criticism and progressive political views for decades. Since Donald Trump pioneered the path of ascending from reality TV star to leader of the free world, Keillor has been busy expressing his views. On Nov. 9, The Washington Post published an Op-Ed piece by Keillor in which he attempted to pick through the postelection-day rubble, criticizing the angry, torch-carrying horde that carried Trump aloft into the Oval Office, while offering humorous suggestions for now-dazed liberals. The essay went viral, picked up by several altweekly and mainstream news sites. In the weeks since, he’s continued to write similar stories for the Post, offering insight and much-needed levity. And for the incoming presidential administration, Keillor is the most feared kind of liberal: outspoken, smart as a whip and a leader with a loyal following that shares his views on politics and society. Yet the greater public at large is more familiar with Keillor’s best-known voice in live radio. From July 6, 1974 to July 1, 2016, Keillor hosted A Prairie Home Companion, the comedy radio show he created that became an NPR staple. Each week, aired from the fictional town of Lake Wobegon, Minnesota, the show featured comedy skits, fake news and sponsors, and musical guests. Prairie surely influenced the future of public radio, while winning Keillor a Peabody Award and a place in the National Radio Hall of Fame. Today, A Prairie Home Companion can claim a weekly listenership of more than four million, making it the largest weekendbased program in radio. On Oct. 15, Nickel Creek mandolinist Chris Thile donned

GARRISON KEILLOR

7 p.m. Dec. 11, The Florida Theatre, Downtown, $35-$79, floridatheatre.com

the mantel of the much-loved pop culture entity, continuing its reign as a broadcast juggernaut, albeit a benign one. An equally witty social commentator as he is radio host, the now-74-year-old Keillor has been a regular contributor to The New Yorker, The Atlantic Monthly and Salon.com. In 2004, a collection of political essays from Salon.com was published as Homegrown Democrat: A Few Plain Thoughts from the Heart of America. Keillor’s literary observations have surely put him in the room with Mark Twain, Sinclair Lewis and even Ambrose Bierce, three pioneering American satirists who weren’t afraid to mince words when it came to sharing their views of the grand old USA. Over the course of his career in radio, Keillor has pined for, and invoked images of, a kind of bygone America that may only exist in Norman Rockwell paintings and vintage advertisements hawking biscuit flour and bunion ointments. It is a fabricated historical realm that leans toward fantasy: constructed memories of wise hobos, fish fries and homemade rhubarb pies cooling on windowsills, that would make both Rockwell and Philip K. Dick proud. Whether this is an ingenious 22 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | DECEMBER 7-13, 2016

PIE

Radio guru, humorist, political gadfly and author Garrison Keillor continues to put a UNIQUE FLAVOR on contemporary life

“hook” for folks wishing to take a break from contemporary reality, or a sentimental tribute, Keillor has left an indelible mark on American consciousness during his tenure on Prairie. And any criticism aside, Keillor remains an outspoken advocate for very tangible, if at times threatened, ideals like fairness, compassion, inclusionary faith and brotherhood of man, all delivered with a humorous slant sans selfrighteous demagoguery. When Keillor returns to Northeast Florida on Dec. 11 for his appearance at The Florida Theatre, he’ll be preaching to the converted. And that’s OK, considering they’re a flock more likely to hold doors open than brickand-mortar any borders. The grand vizier of American storytelling agreed to answer a few questions via email from Folio Weekly. What follows are his ruminations on our humble inquiries. Folio Weekly: Much has been written in the past two weeks about fake news sites publishing exaggerated, and even false, items about Hillary Clinton prior to the election. You’ve been published in notable publications and media outlets for decades, and postelection you’ve been very active in writing about post-Trump USA. What are your thoughts about this new tide of deceptive, fabricated news sources? Garrison Keillor: The fake news I’ve seen is rather clearly fake and a person of normal intelligence would have to make a concerted effort to believe it. I knew a boy in the fourth grade who insisted that it was the Chinese who bombed Pearl Harbor and the harder we tried to show him that this was not true, the more firmly he clung to his belief. It gave him pleasure to be unique. While the show is still enjoying a devoted audience each week, you’ve left an estimable personal legacy as the founder and emblem of A Prairie Home Companion. What would you personally hope that the show has contributed to the American culture and experience? I never thought about contributing to American culture — I only wanted to make people laugh and enjoy some odd music and listen to a story. Some of my stories, I found out later, were recorded on cassette and used to put small children to sleep. That was OK by me. The New York Times is in charge of deciding what’s important in American culture and they have not notified me that I qualify.

It seems like much of your work is steeped in a kind of American nostalgia. What do you find so compelling about not only the history, but also bygone sensibilities, of our country? I’m less nostalgic than the average 13-yearold girl, frankly. My interest in the past is based on the fact that most stories take place there. I’m not interested in sci-fi. So I tell stories that are set in the past, usually the immediate past, like last month or last year. The motive is not nostalgia but curiosity: Why did people do what they did? I have no longing to go back, though I do wish that people would not go around with wires in their ears. It makes them stupid. You were born into the rigid, conservative Plymouth Brethren denomination. From your work in radio, writings and interviews, I know that you left the Brethren decades ago and are a longtime, highly progressive, practicing Lutheran. As four out of five Evangelicals voted for Trump, what are your thoughts on mainstream American Christianity today? People who voted for Mr. Trump did so on the assumption he would lose and so it wouldn’t matter, and now they bear responsibility for him. Sixty million people on the hook and 240 million in the clear. As for the Christian Trumpists, I hope they persuade him to be good to the poor. The late guitarist John Fahey accused A Prairie Home Companion and you as a being emblematic of a kind of “American Fascism.” Admittedly, Fahey was known to be a moody person, but was still a highly progressive artist; and that’s an admittedly fairly extreme example. But over the years, have you ever been surprised by certain people who vocally disliked the show or your work? John was a troubled man who sank into depression and paranoia and I don’t hold him responsible for anything he said. There were plenty of rational people who disliked the show, which is their perfect right, so they didn’t listen to it, which made them somewhat ill-informed about the show they disliked. Do you have any suggestions for your fellow liberal earthlings in surviving the next four years? Live happily, ignore the government, practice kindness and do concrete things to make the world better. Daniel A. Brown dbrown@folioweekly.com

DEC

CHRIS THOMAS BIG BAND CHRISTMAS SHOW Casa Marina Hotel & Restaurant

CIGARS AND POETRY Tobacco Galore

ST. AUGUSTINE SWASHBUCKLER’S TOYS O’Loughlin Pub • for PITS

FESTIVAL OF LIGHTS San Marco Square

PHOTOS & FUN WITH SANTA Coastal Therapy and Learning Center

LEGENDS OF WRESTLING

Everbank Fields •Jacksonville Jaguars

DECEMBER 7-13, 2016 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | 23

ARTS + EVENTS PERFORMANCE

ISSUE-BASED THEATRE SHOWCASE DASOTA students emote on issues at 7:30 p.m. Dec. 7 in Douglas Anderson School of the Arts’ Recital Hall, 2445 San Diego Rd., San Marco, 346-5620. For details, go to duvalschools.org. THE NUTCRACKER PRINCE East Coast Ballet presents this production of the Nutcracker tale, featuring 100 local children and adult dancers, at 7 p.m. Dec. 10 and 2 p.m. Dec. 11 at Wilson Center for the Arts, FSCJ’s South Campus, 11901 Beach Blvd., 646-2222, $30-$80; reception 5:30-6:30 p.m., eastcoastballet.org. FALL YOUNG ARTISTS SHOWCASE Students from the Apex Theatre Studio, ages 8-18, perform at 7 p.m. Dec. 9 at Ponte Vedra Concert Hall, 1050 A1A N., 209-0399, $15, pvconcerthall.com. COMMUNITY NUTCRACKER The 25th anniversary Community Nutcracker blends music and dance to tell the classic tale of a magical Christmas Eve, is staged at 8 p.m. Dec. 9 and 1 and 7:30 p.m. Dec. 10 at The Florida Theatre, 128 E. Forsyth St., Downtown, 355-2787, $26.50-$36.50, floridatheatre.com. AVENUE Q Thrasher-Horne Center for the Arts presents the Tony Award-winning musical, about a college grad who moves to NYC and meets some colorful locals (including puppets!) at 8 p.m. Dec. 9 at 283 College Dr., Orange Park, 276-6750, $24-$63, thcenter.org. DECADES REWIND This classic rock concert experience, featuring an eight-piece band, multimedia presentation, and more than 100 costume changes, is presented at 7:30 p.m. Dec. 8 and 8 p.m. Dec. 9 at Times-Union Center for the Performing Arts’ Terry Theater, Downtown, 442-2929, $28-50-$44.50, artistseriesjax.org. NUTCRACKER REMIXED Students from the Ponte Vedra Ballet & Dance Company and FUSION Performing Arts Academy perform a short, jazzy version of the much-loved holiday classic, at 2 p.m. Dec. 10 at Ponte Vedra Branch Library, 101 Library Blvd., 859-2223, pvballet.com. MRS. BOB CRATCHIT’S WILD CHRISTMAS BINGE Players by the Sea Presents a seasonal parody about Gladys Cratchit (wife of Bob) and her unhinged, booze-soaked ways at 8 p.m. Dec. 8, 19, and 10 and 2 p.m. Dec. 11 at 106 Sixth St. N., Jax Beach, 249-0289, $23; through Dec. 17, playersbythesea.org. A CHRISTMAS CAROL Atlantic Beach Experimental Theatre stages its version of the Dickens classic at 8 p.m. Dec. 9 and 10 and 2 p.m. Dec. 11 at Adele Grage Cultural Center, 716 Ocean Blvd., Atlantic Beach, 249-7177, $20; $10 ages 18 and under; through Dec. 18, abettheatre.com. OLD TIME RADIO HOLIDAY SHOW Amelia Musical Playhouse presents this production that blends staged readings from George Burns and Gracie Allen, Stan Freeberg, Don Ameche, and Fred Allen with musical numbers, at 7:30 p.m. Dec. 9 and 10 at 1955 Island Walkway, Fernandina Beach, 277-3455, $15, ameliamusicalplayhouse.com. A CHRISTMAS STORYAlhambra Theatre & Dining presents the wacky tale about Ralphie, who wants a genuine Red Ryder BB gun for Christmas; through Dec. 24. Dinner 6 p.m.; brunch at noon, featuring a themed menu by Executive Chef DeJuan Roy; at 12000 Beach Blvd., Southside, $49.95-$62 plus tax, 641-1212, alhambrajax.com. EBENEZER: A CHRISTMAS CAROL Amelia Community Theatre presents its song-filled production of Dickens’ much-loved tale. 8 p.m. Dec. 8, 9 and 10 and 2 p.m. Dec. 11 at 207/209 Cedar St., Fernandina Beach, 261-6749, $25; $15 for students through high school; through Dec. 17, ameliacommunitytheatre.org. COTTON PATCH GOSPEL This religious-based musical, with music by Harry Chapin that places the Gospel of Matthew square in the heart of modern-day, rural Georgia, is staged at 7:30 p.m. Dec. 8, 9 and 10 and at 2 p.m. Dec. 11 at Limelight Theatre, 11 Old Mission Ave., St. Augustine, 825-1164, $15; through Dec. 31, limelight-theatre.org. LIGHTWIRE THEATER: A VERY ELECTRIC CHRISTMAS This family-geared Christmas tale, featuring a dazzling light show with music by the likes of Nat King Cole, Mariah Carey and Tchaikovsky, is staged at 3 p.m. Dec. 11 at the Thrasher-Horne Center for the Arts, $13, thcenter.org.

CLASSICAL & JAZZ

HOLIDAY POPS The Jacksonville Symphony and Symphony Chorus, the Douglas Anderson School of the Arts Dancers, and the area’s only guaranteed snowfall are featured in this annual favorite at 7:30 p.m. Dec. 8; 11 a.m. and 8 p.m. Dec. 9; 3 and 8 p.m. Dec. 10, and 3 p.m. Dec. 11 at Times-Union Center’s Jacoby Symphony Hall, 300 W. Water St., Downtown, 354-5547, $28.50-$88.75, jaxsymphony.org. JAZZ SPIRIT OF CHRISTMAS The Dynamic Les DeMerle Jazz Trio featuring Bonnie Eisele put a little swing into holiday favorites, including dinner (6 p.m.), at 8 p.m. Dec. 9 and 10 at 5472 First Coast Hwy., Fernandina Beach, $65 includes dinner and glass of wine; for more info and to purchase tickets, email courtrthomp@gmail.com. ORCHESTRA HOLIDAY CONCERT The JU Orchestra plays holiday hits at 7:30 p.m. Dec. 9 at Jacksonville University’s Terry Concert Hall, 2800 University Blvd. N., Arlington, 256-7386, arts.ju.edu. JU CHOIRS AND BRASS The traditional production Make We Joy: Songs of the Season with the JU Choirs and Brass is featured at 7:30 p.m. Dec. 10 at Jacksonville University’s Terry Concert Hall, arts.ju.edu. WELCOME YULE! The St. Augustine Community Chorus, Youth Chorus, and Chamber Orchestra perform works by Britten, Handel, and traditional carols, at 8 p.m. Dec. 10 and 2 p.m. Dec. 11 at Cathedral Basilica, 60 Cathedral Place, St. Augustine, $20 advance; $25 at the door, $5 military and students, staugustinecommunitychorus.com. HERITAGE SINGERS OF JACKSONVILLE The chorale group performs at 3 p.m. Dec. 11 at Main Library’s Hicks Auditorium, 303 N. Laura St., Downtown, 630-2353, jplmusic.blogspot.com. FIRST COAST WIND SYMPHONY The First Coast Wind Symphony presents its Holiday Pops Concert at 7:30 p.m. Dec. 11 at Redeemer Church, 190 S. Roscoe Blvd., Ponte Vedra Beach, fcwinds.org.

24 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | DECEMBER 7-13, 2016

A PETER WHITE CHRISTMAS Saxman White is joined by Rick Braun and Euge Groove for an evening of jazzy yuletide jollies at 7:30 p.m. Dec. 11 at The Ritz Theatre & Museum, $59-$79, ritzjacksonville.com. TBA BIG BAND These “brass-o-holics” perform at 7:30 p.m. Dec. 12 at Mudville Music Room, 3104 Atlantic Blvd., St. Nicholas, 352-7008, $10, raylewispresents.com. THE ACOUSTIC SESSIONS This night of unplugged music, featuring Tom Leon, Amy Basse, Denton Elkins and Bryan Spradling, starts at 7:30 p.m. Dec. 12 at Amelia Community Theatre’s Studio 209, 207/209 Cedar St., Fernandina, 261-6749, $10, ameliacommunitytheatre.org.

COMEDY

MUTZIE Funnyman Mutzie, rocking for nearly 30 years, is on at 7:30 p.m. Dec. 7 and 8, 8:30 p.m. Dec. 9 and 8 p.m. Dec. 10 at The Comedy Zone, 3130 Hartley Rd., Mandarin, 292-4242, $12-$18, comedyzone.com. LUENELL Funny gal Luenell, perhaps best known for her roles in Borat and Always Sunny in Philadelphia, is on at 8:30 p.m. Dec. 8 and 8 and 10:30 p.m. Dec. 9 and 10 at The Comedy Club of Jacksonville, 11000 Beach Blvd., Southside, 646-4277, $20-$30, jacksonvillecomedy.com. THE COMEDY GET DOWN TOUR The Tour features appearances by humor heavyweights Cedric the Entertainer, D.L. Hughley, George Lopez, Eddie Griffin and Charlie Murphy, and starts at 8 p.m. Dec. 9, Veterans Memorial Arena, 300 A. Philip Randolph Blvd., Downtown, 633-6110, $28.50-$88.75, ticketmaster.com. GARRISON KEILLOR NPR fave and celebrated author and Master of Americana Oration Keillor hits the stage at 7 p.m. Dec. 11 at The Florida Theatre, 128 E. Forsyth St., Downtown, 355-2787, $35-$79, floridatheatre.com.

ART WALKS & MARKETS

FIRST WEDNESDAY ART WALK The downtown art walk, themed Spirit of Giving, is held 5-9 p.m. Dec. 7, featuring more than 20 hotspots open after 9 p.m. and more than 60 total participating venues, over 15 blocks in Downtown Jacksonville. iloveartwalk.com. WHITE HARVEST FARMS & FARMER’S MARKET Local organic, fresh produce is offered 10 a.m.-5 p.m. every Sat. at 5348 Moncrief Rd., Northside, 354-4162; proceeds benefit Clara White Mission, clarawhitemission.org. RIVERSIDE ARTS MARKET Local, regional art, music – Miss Marie’s Kids, Pine Forest School of the Arts, Jacksonville Harmony Chorus, Jax Treblemakers, Starchild and Miss Marie’s Kids 10:30 a.m. Dec. 10 – is featured under the Fuller Warren Bridge, 715 Riverside Ave., free admission, 389-2449, riversideartsmarket.com. ARTRAGEOUS ART WALK Downtown Fernandina Beach galleries are open for self-guided tours, 5:30-8:30 p.m. every second Sat., 277-0717, ameliaisland.com.

MUSEUMS

AMELIA ISLAND MUSEUM OF HISTORY 233 S. Third St., Fernandina, 261-7378, ameliamuseum.org. It Came from the Attic: The Lesesne House is currently on display. CUMMER MUSEUM OF ART & GARDENS 29 Riverside Ave., 356-6857, cummermuseum.org. David Ponsler: Chasing Shadows, is on display through Oct. 4, 2017. Folk Couture: Fashion & Folk Art, works by 13 artists inspired by Folk Art Museum, displays through Jan. 1. Lift: Contemporary Expressions of the African American Experience, featuring works of local artists, displays through Feb. 12. KARPELES MANUSCRIPT LIBRARY MUSEUM 101 W. First St., Springfield, 356-2992, rain.org/~karpeles/jax.html. An exhibit of photographic works by Will Dickey, staff photographer for The Florida Times-Union, is on display through Dec. 30. MUSEUM OF CONTEMPORARY ART JACKSONVILLE 333 N. Laura St., 366-6911, mocajacksonville.unf.edu. The opening reception for the MOCA Student Residency Exhibition, featuring works by MOCA’s inaugural student-in-residence Mary Ratcliff, is held 6-8 p.m. Dec. 8; an artist walkthrough with Ratcliff is featured from 7-8 p.m. Dec. 15. The exhibit is on display through April 2. The Project Atrium: Nicola Lopez installation, A Gentle Defiance of Gravity & Form is on display through Feb. 26. Leaves: Recent Prints & Sculpture by Donald Martin shows through Jan. 22. Retro-Spective: Analog Photography in a Digital World displays through Jan. 8. WORLD GOLF HALL OF FAME & MUSEUM 1 World Golf Pl., St. Augustine, 940-4133, worldgolfhalloffame.org. Grace & Grit – Women Champions Through the Years is on display.

GALLERIES

THE ART CENTER GALLERY Jacksonville Landing, Ste. 139, 233-9252, tacjacksonville.org. Figure drawing classes are held 7 p.m. every Tue. BREW FIVE POINTS 1024 Park St., Riverside, 374-5789, brewfivepoints.com. The exhibit Signs of Life, featuring new works by Chip Southworth, is currently on display. BUTTERFIELD GARAGE ART GALLERY 137 King St., St. Augustine, 825-4577, butterfieldgarage.com. The festive group show White Christmas is on display through Dec. 27. CRISP-ELLERT ART MUSEUM 48 Sevilla St., St. Augustine, 826-8530, flagler.edu/news-events/crisp-ellert-art-museum. The opening reception for the BFA and BA Student Portfolio Exhibition, with works in various media by Flagler College BFA candidates, is featured 5-8 p.m. Dec. 8. The show also displays 10 a.m.-4 p.m. Dec. 9 and 11 a.m.-1 p.m. Dec. 10. THE CULTURAL CENTER AT PONTE VEDRA BEACH 50 Executive Way, 280-0614, ccpvb.org. The exhibit Visions: Ancient & Modern, featuring works by Mary Lou Gibson and Worley Faver, displays through Jan. 5. DOUGLAS ANDERSON SCHOOL OF THE ARTS’ CAMPUS GALLERY 2445 San Diego Rd., San Marco, 346-5620, duvalschools.org. Works by DASOTA students are featured. FIRST STREET GALLERY 216-B First St., Neptune Beach, 241-6928, firststreetgalleryart.com. The 17th Annual Christmas

Ornament Show is on display through Dec. 24. Watercolorist Sandra Baker Hinton’s Coastal Colors is on display through Jan. 4. FLORIDA MINING GALLERY 5300 Shad Rd., Southside, 535-7252, floridamininggallery.com. The exhibit Identity and Abstraction, featuring works by Michael Hunter, Christina West and Alex Jackson, is currently on display. GALLERY 1037 Reddi-Arts, 1037 Hendricks Ave., Southbank, 398-3161, jacksonvilleartistsguild.org. The Jacksonville Artists Guild presents the exhibit Les Quatre Amis, featuring works by Princess Simpson Rashid, Annelies Dykgraaf, Cookie Davis and Marsha Hatcher, through December. HUBLEY GALLERY 804 Anastasia Blvd., St. Augustine, 429-9769. Mary Hubley’s Toescape exhibit is on display. MONROE GALLERIES 40 W. Monroe St., Downtown, 881-0209, monroegalleries.com. Works by Jami Childers, Barbie Workman, Amber Angeloni, Zara Harriz, Amber Bailey and First Coast Plein Air Painters are displayed. MONYA ROWE GALLERY 4 Rohde Ave., St. Augustine, monyarowegallery.com. The exhibit Tropic Apparition, new works by painter Amy Lincoln, is on display through Dec. 18. NASSAU COUNTY LIBRARY 25 N. Fourth St., Fernandina Beach, 277-7365, nassaureads.com. The Art of the Japanese Print, from the Christine and Paul Meehan Collection, is on display through Dec. 30. PLUM GALLERY 10 Aviles St., St. Augustine, 825-0069, plumartgallery.com. New works by painter Sara Pedigo and assemblage artist Barbara J. Cornett are on display through February. THE ROGUE GALLERY 2186-102 Park Avenue, Orange Park, 383-5650, nstagram.com/theroguegallery. “A Rogue’s Night Out!,” featuring local writer Isaac Fox (Cremisi), and artists Mike Debalfo, Jeremy Clark, Kyle Willis, Ingrid of Yuzly, Steven Taylor, Bobby Klaiber, Carmen Cay, Sheila Ford and Jordan Summers, kicks off at 7:30 p.m. Dec. 10. ROTUNDA GALLERY St. Johns County Admin. Bldg., 500 San Sebastian View, St. Augustine, 471-9980. The Betty Griffin Center: A Day Without Violence exhibit is featured through Jan. 26. SUBLIME ORIGINAL GALLERY The DeLO, 420 Broad St., Downtown, 901-5515, sublimeoriginal.com. The exhibit Life is Beautiful: An Exhibition of Works by Linda Broadfoot, Jim Draper, Thomas Hager, Chris Leidy and Steven Lyon, displays through Jan. 9. SOUTHLIGHT GALLERY Bank of America Tower, 50 N. Laura St., Ste. 150, 438-4358, southlightgallery.com. Featured artist Tom Schifanella’s Primal Light: Landscape Photography of Iceland and Peace On Earth, with the works of 18 collaborative members, is open 4-8 p.m. Dec. 7. ST. AUGUSTINE ART ASSOCIATION 22 Marine St., 824-2310, staaa.org. The exhibit Florida Forever! is on display through December. THRASHER-HORNE CENTER FOR THE ARTS 283 College Dr., Orange Park, 276-6750, thcenter.org. New works by David Ouellette and Jennifer Tallerico are on display through Dec. 14.

EVENTS

DICKENS ON CENTRE FESTIVAL Fernandina Beach’s Centre Street becomes a 19th-century Christmas village Dec. 8-11, with horse-drawn carriage rides, period vendors, themed characters, festive lights, and holiday décor. Full schedule at ameliaisland.com/dickens-entertainment. SPRINGFIELD HOLIDAY HOME TOUR The 30th annual Historic Springfield Holiday Home Tour offers a chance to check out notable houses in Jacksonville’s oldest neighborhood district, and includes free wassail and freshly baked cookies, 5-9 p.m. Dec. 9 and 10 at various locations in Springfield, $12 in advance before Dec. 9; $15 after; proceeds benefit the Springfield area through Springfield Improvement Association and Archives, historicspringfield.org. AMELIA ISLAND COOKIE TOUR The Amelia Island Bed & Breakfast Association presents its annual Holiday Cookie Tour at six inns in the historic district. Participants sample a signature cookie at each location while soaking up the ambience of seasonal decorations. Horse-drawn carriages are available to transport guests from inn to inn and trolley service is offered for transportation to the beach. A portion of proceeds benefits Micah’s Place, which provides prevention and intervention services to victims of domestic violence; noon-5 p.m. Dec. 10, Amelia Island, $25 advance; $30 at the door, $150 VIP (plus shipping and handling/tax includes a midweek stay at your inn of choice and a cookbook). Schedule and tickets at ameliaislandinns.com/cookie-tour. JACKSONVILLE JAGUARS VS. MINNESOTA VIKINGS The Jacksonville Jaguars (2-9, baby!) take on the Minnesota Vikings at 1 p.m. Dec. 11 at EverBank Field, Downtown, $45-$365, 633-6110, ticketmaster.com. ST. AUGUSTINE ECO TOURS St. Augustine Eco Tours offers onehour excursions in six- or 12-passenger vessels daily from 6-7 p.m. and 7:30-8:30 p.m. along the Matanzas River departing from the Municipal Marina. 111 Avenida Menendez, St. Augustine, $35 per person; $200 trip for two or up to six guests; $400 for parties up to 12, 377-7245, staugustineecotours.com. JACKSONVILLE BEACH DECK THE CHAIRS A multimedia holiday show with more than 40 decorated lifeguard chairs and an enhanced 30-foot-tall Christmas Tree, including programmed music, dancing lights, and holiday light projections, is presented at 6, 7, 8 and 9 p.m. every Fri., Sat., and Sun. in December (except Christmas). Info at deckthechairs.org. ENCHANTED CHRISTMAS VILLAGE This family-friendly Christmas compound, which includes Santa’s workshop, letterwriting station to pen missives to Santa and U.S. troops, giant hay maze and hayrides, carousel rides, craft barn marketplace, food trucks, nightly performances, and more than one million lights, is held 5-10 p.m. Tue.-Fri. and 10 a.m.-10 p.m. Sat. and Sun., through December at 17255 Normandy Blvd., Northside, $22; $12 ages 3-13, kids 3 and younger free, jacksonvillechristmas.com. JAX ILLUMINATIONS HOLIDAY LIGHT SHOW The fourth annual Drive Thru Holiday Light Show, featuring a mile-long drive through more than a million holiday lights, is held nightly 6-9:30 p.m. through Jan. 1 at Morocco Shrine Center, 3800 St. Johns Bluff Rd. S., Southside, $20; seven passenger maximum, $2.50 each additional passenger, jaxilluminations.com. _____________________________________________ To list an event, send time, date, location (street address, city), admission price, contact number to print to Daniel A. Brown – email dbrown@folioweekly.com or mail, 45 W. Bay St., Ste. 103, Jacksonville FL 32202. Items run as space is available. Deadline noon Wed. for next Wed. printing.

FOLIO A+E : MUSIC

inger-songwriter Pierce Pettis has had his fingers in plenty of music-industry pies. Born in Alabama, he cut his teeth as a writer and session musician at the legendary Muscle Shoals Sound Studios before joining Nashville conglomerate Polygram/Universal as a staff songwriter in the ’70s. His songs were covered by myriad artists, from Garth Brooks to Art Garfunkel to Joan Baez, and eventually Pierce migrated north to New York City, where he fell in with the narrative-first firebrands of the 1980s Fast Folk movement. As all good Southerners do, Pettis returned home in the ’90s and recommitted himself to incubating his own solo career, as a thoughtful tunesmith with an ear for uplifting melodies and a mind best expressed in wry, piercing prose. Pettis is a fan favorite and regular fixture on the First Coast; we chatted with him before his annual Christmas Tour stop at Mudville Music Room in St. Nicholas to talk about faith, politics and genuine cri de coeur.

Folio Weekly: Give us an idea of what these Christmas Tour shows entail. Pierce Pettis: I have quite a bit of Christmasrelated material that I perform only between Thanksgiving and Christmas: My songs “Miriam” and “If It Wasn’t for the Night,” along with the Anglican hymn “In the Bleak Midwinter.” Generally, I’ll do a set of my regular material, mostly from my five Compass Records releases. Then I’ll take a short break and come back with a set of Christmas music. Many of the venues are quite special to me, such as Mudville Music Room and The Warehouse in Tallahassee, where the show’s become an annual tradition. In fact, the shows at Mudville grew out of an even longer history of annual Christmas shows at European Street Café. When I play in Northeast Florida, it’s like a homecoming for me. So you’re comfortable exploring the holidayspecific interplay of faith, family and society? I think so. Since Christmas is obviously a Christian holiday, there should be no shame or surprise in the mixing of faith and family in the presentation. But I also like to recognize that my audience is broader than merely Christian and that this season has special meaning to people of many faiths — or no faith. One of the reasons I wrote “Miriam” was to explore the Jewish roots of the Christmas story and make it more accessible to non-Christian (and especially Jewish) listeners.

PIERCE PETTIS CHRISTMAS SHOW

7:30 p.m. Dec. 8, Mudville Music Room, St. Nicholas, $15, raylewispresents.com You’re planning to work on new material in 2017. Has your writing process shifted significantly? I’m less anxious now. I’ve never tried to force it, but I’m even more inclined to wait for the right line or the right music. There’s no formula other than just work. I tend to start a lot of ideas, let the inspiration run its course, and then get back to it later. I do this with both music and lyrics, together and separately, sometimes over a period of years. I have folders full of lines, themes, song starts, melodies, chord progressions, etc. That’s why I tell people my best songs seem to take either 10 minutes or 10 years. Sometimes it comes all at once; sometimes it takes a while. But I’m in no hurry. What did you learn in your early songwriting days at Muscle Shoals and in Nashville? I came to Muscle Shoals when I was 18 years old thinking I was hot stuff. The guys

Singer-songwriting legend Pierce Pettis returns for an evening of ORIGINAL AND SEASONAL music

HOLIDAY MESSAGES

there, particularly Jimmy Johnson and Barry Beckett, were exactly what I needed: someone to burst that bubble and bring me down to reality. They made it clear I was not all that — but if I worked hard, I might have some potential. I learned that being a musician and a songwriter is a craft and that you should take your work seriously and yourself lightly, not the other way around. Much later in Nashville, I had a similar experience learning a lot from some of the best songwriters in the business. My first boss at Polygram, Doug Howard, encouraged me to write great songs and great artists would find them. That turned out to be true when folks like Garth Brooks and Art Garfunkel started covering my stuff. Then you went off on your own. Do you approach live performance as a solo artist differently now than in the ’80s? It’s more fun now. Not to brag, but I’m just much, much better. I have a lifetime of experience behind me and a huge catalogue of songs to choose from, as well as covers and other material I’ve picked up over the years. I’m so much more relaxed — nothing to prove. At my age, sometimes the voice can get a little thin and ragged. But I know so much more about how to use my voice, even on the more challenging nights. And on a good night, I’ve never sung better in my life. I also love the songs that I’ve been writing the last few years. I feel they have a maturity and depth that comes from doing this over a long period of time. Really, this feels like a golden time for me as a performer.

What kind of time is it to be a folk musician, especially given the current state of social and political affairs? Though I’ve often been accused of being one, I really don’t see myself as a “folksinger.” I see myself as a performing songwriter, working primarily in an acoustic genre, largely due to the fact that I work almost entirely alone. When I was younger, I might have thought I was on a mission to save the world. As I got older, it occurred to me that not only was I not curing cancer, but I might well be causing it. I’ve known a lot of songwriters and musicians over the years, and they’re mostly wonderful people. But there are very few I would consider qualified to give political or personal advice. I feel I am equally unqualified, so I avoid inflicting that on my audience. The wise old hippie philosopher, Wavy Gravy, had a great quote about politics: “poly,” meaning “from the many” and “ticks,” those little blood-sucking vermin. That tends to sum up my view of politics in general. So songwriting is more personal for you. To me, it’s all about the song. When I become too focused on my politics, my opinions or my personal life, I lose sight of what really matters: the song. The end must always be the song. It’s not an advertisement for my ego, my pathos or my preconceived opinions. What I want to hear in a song is a genuine cri de coeur — a cry from the heart. That’s not the same thing as a cry for help. Nick McGregor mail@folioweekly.com DECEMBER 7-13, 2016 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | 25

“Dig this beard, Santa!” THE OAK RIDGE BOYS perform their Christmas Celebration Concert Dec. 13 at The Florida Theatre, Downtown.

LIVE + LOCAL MUSIC CONCERTS THIS WEEK

26 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | DECEMBER 7-13, 2016

SPADE McQUADE 6 p.m. Dec. 7, Fionn MacCool’s Irish Pub, Jacksonville Landing, Ste. 176, 374-1247. Jingle Jam for St. Jude: DAVID NAIL, GRANGER SMITH, RUNAWAY JUNE 7:30 p.m. Dec. 7, Times-Union Center for the Performing Arts’ Moran Theater, 300 Water St., Downtown, 633-6110, $35-$105; proceeds benefit St. Jude Children’s Research Hospital. TAYLOR HICKS 8 p.m. Dec. 7, Ponte Vedra Concert Hall, 1050 A1A N., 209-0399, $31.50-$39.50. STRANGERWOLF, FOLK IS PEOPLE, TIMOTHY EERIE, TOMBOI, JAX TEEN OPEN MIC 5 p.m. Dec. 7, 1904 Music Hall, 19 Ocean St., Downtown. THE WORD ALIVE, VOLUMES, ISLANDER, INVENT ANIMATE 6:30 p.m. Dec. 8, 1904 Music Hall, $16. PIERCE PETTIS 7:30 p.m. Dec. 8, Mudville Music Room, 3104 Atlantic Blvd., St. Nicholas, 352-7008, $10. 3 THE BAND 9 p.m. Dec. 8, Flying Iguana, 207 Atlantic Blvd., Neptune Beach, 853-5680. OLDIES NIGHT (RAY’S BIRTHDAY PARTY & BENEFIT FOR CAMIE) 7:30 p.m. Dec. 9, Mudville Music Room, $10. BARB WIRE DOLLS, ASKMEIFICARE, STRANGE FRIEND 8 p.m. Dec. 9, Jack Rabbits, 1528 Hendricks Ave., San Marco, 398-7496, $8. ZOOGMA, DAILY BREAD, CAT PARTY 8 p.m. Dec. 9, 1904 Music Hall, $12 advance; $15 day of. GO GET DONE 9:30 p.m. Dec. 9, Whiskey Jax, 10915 Baymeadows Rd., Southside, 634-7208. GINGER BREAD BAND 10 p.m. Dec. 9, The Roadhouse, 231 Blanding Blvd., Orange Park, 264-0611. Riverside Arts Market: MISS MARIE’S KIDS, PINE FOREST SCHOOL OF THE ARTS, JACKSONVILLE HARMONY CHORUS, JAX TREBLEMAKERS, STARCHILD 10:30 a.m. Dec. 10, 715 Riverside Ave., 389-2449. A CURE FOR PAIN (Morphine Tribute), DYLAN NIRVANA, THE BAD FLOWERS, BENT WAVES 9 p.m. Dec. 10, Shanghai Nobby’s, 10 Anastasia Blvd., St. Augustine, 547-2188. BRIDGING THE MUSIC 6 p.m. Dec. 10, 1904 Music Hall, $12. CHRIS LANE 7 p.m. Dec. 10, Mavericks Live, 2 Independent Dr., Downtown, 356-1110, $15. LARRY MANGUM’S SONGWRITER’S CIRCLE 7:30 p.m. Dec. 10, Mudville Music Room, $10. THE FIXX, URSULA 8 p.m. Dec. 10, Jack Rabbits, $20. TAKE COVER 9:30 p.m. Dec. 10, Whiskey Jax. SINGLE FIRE, OF GOOD NATURE 10 p.m. Dec. 10, The Roadhouse. Second Sunday at Stetson’s: LARRY MANGUM, PAUL GARFINKEL, EMMETT CARLISLE, MARY BETH CAMPBELL, AL SCORTINO, JOHN FRENCH 2 p.m. Dec. 11, Beluthahatchee Park, 1523 S.R. 13., Fruit Cove, 206-8304, $10. AFTON: PUSH PLAY 6 p.m. Dec. 11, 1904 Music Hall, $14. SABRINA CARPENTER, HARLETSON 6 p.m. Dec. 11, Jack Rabbits. BLOOD ON THE DANCE FLOOR, TEAR OUT THE HEART, VANITY STRIKES, JUSTIN SYMBOL 7 p.m. Dec. 12, Jack Rabbits, $12. VESPERTEEN, DASH TEN, HAYDEN MILES, SOLAR ELLIPSES 7 p.m. Dec. 13, Jack Rabbits, $8.

THE OAK RIDGE BOYS CHRISTMAS CELEBRATION 8 p.m. Dec. 13, The Florida Theatre, 128 E. Forsyth St., Downtown, 355-2787, $25-$50. CONTINENTAL, DIGDOG, GOV CLUB 8 p.m. Dec. 14, Jack Rabbits, $7 advance; $10 day of. EDWIN McCAIN, DANNY BURNS 8 p.m. Dec. 14, Ponte Vedra Concert Hall, 1050 A1A N., 209-0399, $31.50-$45.50.

UPCOMING CONCERTS

THE PAUSES, DEADAIRES, FLOWER CITY CONSPIRACY Dec. 15, Jack Rabbits TOOTS LORRAINE & THE TRAFFIC 9 p.m. Dec. 15, Mojo Kitchen DAN ANDRIANO, DEADAIRES Dec. 16, DOS Coffee & Wine GRIFFIN HOUSE Dec. 18, Café Eleven BROTHER CEPHUS, CIVILIAN, THE YOUNG STEP Dec. 20, Mockshop Music Exchange FUTURE THIEVES Dec. 21, Jack Rabbits JACKIE EVANCHO Dec. 21, The Florida Theatre INSPECTION 12 Dec. 23, Jack Rabbits TOMBOI Dec. 25, Jack Rabbits RICKOLUS, COMPLICATED ANIMALS Dec. 29, Jack Rabbits DONNA THE BUFFALO, BUTCH TRUCKS & THE FREIGHT TRAIN BAND Dec. 29, Ponte Vedra Concert Hall THE NTH POWER Dec. 30, Ritz Theatre SHEN YUN 2017 Jan. 3 & 4, Times-Union Center THE MOTHER GOOSES Jan. 6, Jack Rabbits MICHAEL BOLTON Jan. 11, The Florida Theatre DAMIEN ESCOBAR Jan. 12, Ponte Vedra Concert Hall WIMPY RUTHERFORD & THE CRYPTICS Jan. 13, Nobby’s Winter Jam: CROWDER, BRITT NICOLE, TENTH AVENUE NORTH, ANDY MINEO, COLTON DIXON, THOUSAND FOOT KRUTCH, NEWSONG, OBB, SARAH REEVES, STEVEN MALCOLM Jan. 13, Veterans Memorial Arena LEWIS BLACK Jan. 13, The Florida Theatre DWEEZIL ZAPPA Jan. 13, Ponte Vedra Concert Hall HENRY ROLLINS Jan. 14, Ponte Vedra Concert Hall LOS LOBOS Jan. 15, Ponte Vedra Concert Hall PINK MARTINI Jan. 17, The Florida Theatre DOYLE BRAMHALL II Jan. 17, Ponte Vedra Concert Hall MIKE DOUGHTY, WHEATUS Jan. 18, Jack Rabbits DR. JOHN & the NITE TRIPPERS Jan. 18, Ponte Vedra Concert Hall UPRIGHT CITIZENS BRIGADE Jan. 20, Ponte Vedra Concert Hall ORDINARY BOYS: A tribute to the music of The Smiths & MorriseyJan. 21, 1904 Music Hall PETER BRADLEY ADAMS Jan. 22, Café Eleven Spend the Night with BILLY CRYSTAL Jan. 25, TimesUnion Center’s Moran Theater JEANNE ROBERTSON Jan. 21, The Florida Theatre ELVIS LIVES Jan. 24, Times-Union Center GLADYS KNIGHT Jan. 25, The Florida Theatre LEE BRICE, JUSTIN MOORE, WILLIAM MICHAEL MORGAN Jan. 26, Veterans Memorial Arena KATHLEEN MADIGAN Jan. 27, The Florida Theatre J BOOG, JEMERE MORGAN Jan. 27, Ponte Vedra Concert Hall KENNY ROGERS, LINDA DAVIS Jan. 28, Thrasher-Horne Center for the Performing Arts THE BEACH BOYS Jan. 28, The Florida Theatre

VOCALOSITY Feb. 1, The Florida Theatre CHRISTIE DASHIELL Feb. 2, Ritz Theatre ARLO GUTHRIE Feb. 2, The Florida Theatre TOM RUSH Feb. 3, Ponte Vedra Concert Hall PAT METHENY, ANTONIO SANCHEZ, LINDA OH, GWILYM SIMCOCK Feb. 3, The Florida Theatre SARA WATKINS Feb. 4, Ponte Vedra Concert Hall BOSTON POPS ESPLANDE ORCHESTRA Feb. 4, TimesUnion Center for the Performing Arts GAELIC STORM Feb. 8, Ponte Vedra Concert Hall G. LOVE & SPECIAL SAUCE Feb. 9, Ponte Vedra Concert Hall HISS GOLDEN MESSENGER Feb. 9, Jack Rabbits THE BABES Feb. 11, Ponte Vedra Concert Hall ANDERS OSBORNE, THE GHOST OF PAUL REVERE Feb. 11, Mavericks Live Lincolnville Porch Fest: CHELSEA SADDLER, TELEPATHIC LINES, RIVERNECKS, THE WOBBLY TOMS, GHOST TROPIC, AMY HENDRICKSON, SAND FLEAS, ROBBIE DAMMIT & THE BROKEN STRINGS, NESTA, RAMONA QUIMBY, KYLE WAGONER, EARLY DISCLAIMERS, LONESOME BERT & THE SKINNY LIZARDS, KENSLEY STEWART, THE WILLOWWACKS, ASLYN & THE NAYSAYERS Feb. 12, St. Augustine UNDER THE STREETLAMP Feb. 12, Ponte Vedra Concert Hall AL DI MEOLA Feb. 14, Ponte Vedra Concert Hall ANDY McKEE Feb. 15, Ponte Vedra Concert Hall THREE DOG NIGHT, AMERICA Feb. 16, The Florida Theatre RICHARD THOMPSON Feb. 16, Ponte Vedra Concert Hall THE PAUL THORN BAND Feb. 17, Ponte Vedra Concert Hall THE PIANO GUYS Feb. 17, The Florida Theatre TOBYMAC, MATT MAHER, MANDISA, MAC POWELL, CAPITAL KINGS, RYAN STEVENSON, HOLLYN Feb. 17, Veterans Memorial Arena TRAE CROWDER, COREY RYAN FORESTER, DREW MORGAN Feb. 18, Ponte Vedra Concert Hall SOUTHSIDE JOHNNY & THE ASBURY JUKES Feb. 19, The Florida Theatre COLIN HAY Feb. 22, Ponte Vedra Concert Hall JOE BONAMASSA Feb. 22, The Florida Theatre MINDI ABAIR Feb. 23, Ritz Theatre MANHATTAN TRANSFER, TAKE 6 Feb. 23, The Florida Theatre FOREIGNER, KANSAS Feb. 24, St. Augustine Amphitheatre ELIZABETH COOK, DALE WATSON Feb. 24, P.V.C. Hall OLD 97’s, BOTTLE ROCKETS Feb. 25, P. Vedra Concert Hall PEPPER, LESS THAN JAKE Feb. 25, St. Augustine Amphitheatre DENNIS DeYOUNG, Jacksonville Rock Symphony Feb. 26, The Florida Theatre AGENT ORANGE, GUTTERMOUTH, THE QUEERS, THE ATOM AGE Feb. 26, St. Augustine Amphitheatre Backyard Party TAJ EXPRESS Feb. 28, Times-Union Center AMOS LEE Feb. 28, The Florida Theatre MARC COHN March 1, Ponte Vedra Concert Hall THE WEIGHT, members of The Band March 3, P.V.C. Hall LUCINDA WILLIAMS March 4, Ponte Vedra Concert Hall THE GROWLERS March 4, St. Augustine Amphitheatre Backyard Party SPYRO GYRA March 5, The Florida Theatre WILLIE NELSON & FAMILY, DWIGHT YOAKAM March 7, St. Augustine Amphitheatre

LIVE + LOCAL MUSIC Alt-folkie EDWIN McCAIN (pictured) performs with DANNY BURNS Dec. 14 at Ponte Vedra Concert Hall.

TAJ MAHAL March 10, Ponte Vedra Concert Hall KODO March 11, The Florida Theatre CLINT BLACK March 12, The Florida Theatre AUDRA McDONALD, JACKSONVILLE CHILDREN’S CHORUS March 12, Times-Union Center’s Jacoby Symphony Hall THE CHARLIE DANIELS BAND March 16, The Florida Theatre IGOR & THE RED ELVISES March 16, Café Eleven GET THE LED OUT March 17, The Florida Theatre ADAM SAVAGE, PILOBOLUS SHADOWLAND March 21, The Florida Theatre THE HARLEM GLOBETROTTERS March 21, Veterans Memorial Arena 24 Karat Gold Show: STEVIE NICKS, PRETENDERS March 23, Veterans Memorial Arena I Love The ’90s Tour: VANILLA ICE, NAUGHTY by NATURE, SUGAR RAY’S MARK McGRATH, BIZ MARKIE, ALL-4-ONE, YOUNG MC March 24, St. Augustine Amphitheatre CHEYENNE JACKSON March 24, Ponte Vedra Concert Hall 1964: The TRIBUTE March 25, St. Augustine Amphitheatre AIR SUPPLY March 26, The Florida Theatre RICKY SKAGGS & KENTUCKY THUNDER March 26, Ponte Vedra Concert Hall JIM BRICKMAN March 31, The Florida Theatre RICK THOMAS April 1, Ponte Vedra Concert Hall XIU XIU April 1, The Sleeping Giant Film Festival ANA POPOVIC April 5, Ponte Vedra Concert Hall LEO KOTTKE, KELLER WILLIAMS April 6, The Florida Theatre LITTLE RIVER BAND, Jacksonville Rock Symphony April 7, The Florida Theatre Legends of Southern Hip Hop: SCARFACE, MYSTIKAL, 8 BALL & MJG, TRICK DADDY, BUN B, JUVENILE, PASTOR TROY, ANDRAE MURCHINSON April 8, Ritz Theatre NuSoul Revival Tour: MUSIQ SOUsLCHILD, LYFE JENNINGS, AVERY SUNSHINE, KINDRED THE FAMILY SOUL April 8, Times-Union Center for the Performing Arts BUDDY GUY, THE RIDES (Stephen Stills, Kenny Wayne Shepherd, Barry Goldberg) April 9, St. Augustine Amphitheatre CHRIS BOTTI April 18, The Florida Theatre Wanee Music Festival: BOB WEIRD & THE CAMPFIRE BAND, TREY ANASTASIO BAND, WIDESPREAD PANIC, GOV’T MULE, DARK STAR ORCHESTRA, DR. JOHN & THE NITE TRIPPERS, JJ GREY & MOFRO, LES BRERS (BUTCH TRUCKS, JAIMOE, OTEIL BURBRIDGE, MARC QUINONES, JACK PEARSON, PATE BERGERON, BRUCE KATZ, LAMAR WILLIAMS JR.), JAIMOE’S JASSSZ BAND, BLACKBERRY SMOKE, LEFTOVER SALMON (MUSIC OF NEIL YOUNG), MATISYAHU, THE GREYBOY ALLSTARS, KELLER WILLIAMS’ GRATEFUL GRASS, PAPADOSIO, TURKUAZ, PINK TALKING FU (MUSIC OF DAVID BOWIE & PRINCE), PINK TALKING FISH, KUNG FU, DJ LOGIC, BOBBY LEE ROGERS TRIO, DEVON ALLMAN BAND, THE MARCUS KING BAND, YETI TRIO, BROTHERS AND SISTERS, BUTCH TRUCKS & THE FREIGHT TRAIN BAND April 20, 21 & 22, Suwannee Music Park MJ LIVE! April 20-23, Times-Union Center TOWER OF POWER April 22, The Florida Theatre RED HOT CHILI PEPPERS April 23, Veterans Memorial Arena NATHANIEL RATELIFF & THE NIGHT SWEATS April 26, St. Augustine Amphitheatre Welcome to Rockville: SOUNDGARDEN, DEF LEPPARD, A PERFECT CIRCLE, THE OFFSPRING, MASTODON, CHEVELLE, SEETHER, PAPA ROACH, Three Days Grace, Pierce The Veil, Coheed and Cambria, Alter Bridge, The Pretty Reckless, Amon Amarth, Eagles of Death Metal, Highly Suspect, Dillinger Escape Plan, In Flames, Gojira, In This Moment, Motionless In White, All That Remains, Nothing More, Rival Sons, Beartooth, Every Time I Die, Attila, Starset, Dinosaur Pile-Up, I Prevail, Kyng, Crobot, Volumes, Sylar, Fire From the Gods, As

Lions, Badflower, Goodbye June, Frank Carter & The Rattlesnakes, Cover Your Tracks, The Charm The Fury April 29 & 30, Metropolitan Park STEVE WINWOOD May 5, St. Augustine Amphitheatre ERIC CHURCH May 5, Veterans Memorial Arena BASTILLE May 7, St. Augustine Amphitheatre CIRQUE DU SOLEIL’S OVO Aug. 2-6, Veterans Memorial Arena TIM McGRAW & FAITH HILL Sept. 16, Veterans Memorial Arena DELFEAYO MARSALIS Sept. 29, Riverside Fine Arts Series

LIVE MUSIC CLUBS

AMELIA ISLAND + FERNANDINA

ALLEY CAT BEER HOUSE, 316 Centre St., 491-1001 Dan Voll every Wed. John Springer every Thur. Brian Ernst every Fri. LA MANCHA, 2709 Sadler Rd., 261-4646 Miguel Paley 5:30-9 p.m. every Fri.-Sun. Javier Parez every Sun.

SLIDERS SEASIDE GRILL, 1998 S. Fletcher Ave., 277-6652 King Eddie & Pili Pili 6 p.m. Dec. 7. Tad Jennings Dec. 8. Davis Turner Dec. 10. JC & Mike 6 p.m. Dec. 11. Savannah Bassett Dec. 12. Mark O’Quinn Dec. 13 SURF RESTAURANT, 3199 S. Fletcher Ave., 261-5711 Black Jack Band every Fri.

AVONDALE + ORTEGA

CASBAH CAFÉ, 3628 St. Johns Ave., 981-9966 Goliath Flores 8 p.m. every Wed. Live jazz every Sun. Live music 9 p.m. every Mon. ECLIPSE, 4219 St. Johns Ave. KJ Free 9 p.m. every Tue. & Thur. Indie dance 9 p.m. every Wed. ’80s & ’90s every Fri. MELLOW MUSHROOM PIZZA BAKERS, 3611 St. Johns Ave., 388-0200 Live music every Thur.-Sat.

DECEMBER 7-13, 2016 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | 27

LIVE + LOCAL MUSIC THE BEACHES

“Hunky” Tonk Hero! Country music heartthrob CHRIS LANE performs Dec. 10 at Mavericks Live, Downtown.

(All venues in Jax Beach unless otherwise noted)

BLUE TYPHOON, 2309 Beach Blvd., 379-3789 Billy Bowers 5:30 p.m. Dec. 14. Live music most weekends BLUE WATER ISLAND GRILL, 205 First St. N., 249-0083 Live music every weekend BRASS ANCHOR PUB, 2292 Mayport Rd., Atlantic Beach, 249-0301 Joe Oliff 8 p.m. Dec. 7 CASA MARINA HOTEL, 691 First St. N., 270-0025 The Chris Thomas Band Dec. 7 THE COURTYARD, 200 First St., Neptune Beach, 241-1026 Bill Ricci 7 p.m. Dec. 9 CULHANE’S, 967 Atlantic Blvd., Atlantic Beach, 249-9595 Vera, Chuck & Dave & Young 6:30 p.m. Dec. 9. DJ Hal every Sat. THE FLYING IGUANA, 207 Atlantic Blvd., Neptune Beach, 853-5680 3 the Band 9 p.m. Dec. 8. Live music 10 p.m. Dec. 9 & 10. Darren Corlew 8:30 p.m. Dec. 11 GUSTO, 1266 Beach Blvd., 372-9925 Groov 7:30 p.m. every Wed. Murray Goff every Fri. Under the Bus every Sat. Gene Nordan 6 p.m. every Sun. HARBOR TAVERN, 160 Mayport Rd., Atlantic Beach, 246-2555 Toxic Shock 8 p.m. Dec. 7. Live music most weekends LYNCH’S IRISH PUB, 514 First St. N., 249-5181 Yamadeo 10 p.m. Dec. 9 & 10. Dirty Pete 10 p.m. every Wed. Split Tone every Thur. Chillula every Sun. Be Easy every Mon. Krakajax every Tue. MELLOW MUSHROOM, 1018 Third St. N., 241-5600 Bonnie Blue 9 p.m. Dec. 8 MEZZA RESTAURANT & BAR, 110 First St., Neptune Beach, 249-5573 Gypsies Ginger every Wed. Mike Shackelford, Steve Shanholtzer every Thur. Mezza Shuffle every Mon. Trevor Tanner every Tue. RAGTIME TAVERN, 207 Atlantic Blvd., Atlantic Beach, 241-7877 Live music every Wed.-Sun. SEACHASERS, 831 First St. N., 372-0444 Cowboy Rolex 8 p.m.every Thur. SOUTHERN GROUNDS & CO., 200 First St., Neptune Beach, 249-2922 Jazz Corner 6 p.m. every Tue. WHISKEY JAX, 950 Marsh Landing Pkwy., 853-5973 Murray Goff 6 p.m. every Wed. ZETA BREWING, 131 First Ave. N., 372-0727 Live music every Thur.-Sat.

CAMDEN COUNTY, GA.

CAPTAIN STAN’S SMOKEHOUSE, 700 Bedell Dr., Woodbine, 912-729-9552 Acoustic music 6:30 p.m. every Sat.

DOWNTOWN

1904 MUSIC HALL, 19 Ocean St. N. Strangerwolf, Folk Is People, Timothy Eerie, Tomboi, Jax Teen Open Mic 5 p.m. Dec. 7. The Word Alive, Volumes, Islander, Invent Animate 6:30 p.m. Dec. 8. Zoogma, Daily Bread, Cat Party 8 p.m. Dec. 9. Bridging The Music 6 p.m. Dec. 10. Afton: Push Play 6 p.m. Dec. 11 DE REAL TING, 128 W. Adams St., 633-9738 De Lions of Jah 7 p.m. Dec. 9. Live music most weekends DOS GATOS, 123 E. Forsyth St., 354-0666 DJ Brandon every Thur. DJ NickFresh every Sat. DJ Randall every Mon. DJ Hollywood every Tue. FIONN MacCOOL’S IRISH PUB, Jax Landing, 374-1247 Spade McQuade 6 p.m. Dec. 7 & 9. Ace Winn Dec. 9. Brett Foster Dec. 10. Live music every Fri. & Sat. JACKSONVILLE LANDING, 2 Independent Dr., 353-1188 Front Porch Christmas 5 p.m. Dec. 7. Spanky 6 p.m. Dec. 8. 22nd annual Tuba Christmas Dec. 10. Str8Up Dec. 10. 418 Band Dec. 11 MARK’S DOWNTOWN, 315 E. Bay St., 355-5099 DJ Shotgun 10 p.m. every Sat. MAVERICKS LIVE, Jax Landing, 356-1110 Chris Lane 6 p.m. Dec. 10. Joe Buck, DJ Justin every Thur.-Sat. MYTH NIGHTCLUB, 333 E. Bay St., 707-0474 DJs Lady Miaou, Booty Boo, Cry Havoc, Some Dude 9 p.m. every Glitz Wed. Q45, live music every Wed. EDM every Thur. Eric Rush every Fri. DJ IBay every Sat. THE VOLSTEAD, 115 W. Adams St., 414-3171 Swing Dance Sundays 7 p.m.

FLEMING ISLAND

MELLOW MUSHROOM PIZZA BAKERS, 1800 Town Ctr. Blvd., 541-1999 Felix Chang 9:30 p.m. Dec. 15. Live music most weekends WHITEY’S FISH CAMP, 2032 C.R. 220, 269-4198 Love Monkey 9 p.m. Dec. 9. Lonely Highway 9 p.m. Dec. 10. Robbie Litt 4 p.m. Dec. 11. Live music every Thur.-Sun.

INTRACOASTAL

CLIFF’S BAR & GRILL, 3033 Monument Rd., 645-5162 Smooth McFlea Dec. 7. Blistur 10 p.m. Dec. 9 & 10. Open mic every Tue. Live music most every weekend; Sundays on the deck JERRY’S SPORTS GRILLE, 13170 Atlantic Blvd., Ste. 22, 220-6766 Boogie Freaks 7:30 p.m. Dec. 9

MANDARIN

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ENZA’S ITALIAN RESTAURANT, 10601 San Jose Blvd., Ste. 109, 268-4458 Brian Iannucci Dec. 7 & 11

IGGY’S SEAFOOD SHACK, 104 Bartram Oaks Walk, Ste. 101, 209-5209 Brittney Lawrence 8 p.m. Dec. 10. Conch Fritters Dec. 11. Live music every Fri. & Sat. DJ Greg every Wed.

ORANGE PARK + MIDDLEBURG

DEE’S MUSIC BAR, 2141 Loch Rane Blvd., Ste. 140, 375-2240 Go Get Gone 10 p.m. Dec. 10. Live music weekends. DJ Daddy-O every Tue. THE HILLTOP, 2030 Wells Rd., 272-5959 John Michael on the piano every Tue.-Sat. THE ROADHOUSE, 231 Blanding Blvd., 264-0611 DJ Big Mike 10 p.m. Dec. 8. Ginger Bread Band 10 p.m. Dec. 9. Single Fire, Of Good Nature 10 p.m. Dec. 10. Anton LaPlume Dec. 14. Live music every weekend SHARK CLUB, 714 Park Ave., 215-1557 Digital Skyline 9 p.m. Dec. 7. Live music most weekends TAPS BAR & GRILL, 1605 C.R. 220, 278-9421 Live music most weekends

PONTE VEDRA BEACH

PUSSER’S GRILLE, 816 A1A, 280-7766 Forrest & the Fire 7 p.m. Dec. 10. Live music every Fri. & Sat. TABLE 1, 330 A1A, 280-5515 Gary Starling Jazz Band 7:30 p.m. Dec. 8

RIVERSIDE + WESTSIDE

ACROSS THE STREET, 948 Edgewood Ave. S., 683-4182 Live music most weekends BRIXX, 220 Riverside Ave., 300-3928 Live music every Thur. & Fri. HOBNOB, 220 Riverside Ave., Ste. 10, 513-4272 Live music every Fri. LIMES LIVE, 1265 S. Lane Ave., gobigentertainment.net Askmeificare, pE 8 p.m. Dec. 3 MURRAY HILL THEATRE, 932 Edgewood Ave., 388-7807 878, Jigsaw, Unmasked, ABrodie 8 p.m. Dec. 9. Red’s End of Silence tour 8 p.m. Dec. 10 NIGHTHAWKS, 2952 Roosevelt Blvd. Dark Sermon, Culture Killer 7 p.m. Dec. 11. Live music most weekends RAIN DOGS, 1045 Park St., 379-4969 Russ T Nutz Dec. 8. Low Main, Cry Havoc, Vlad the Inhaler 9 p.m. Dec. 9 RIVERSIDE ARTS MARKET, 715 Riverside Ave. (under the bridge), 389-2449 Miss Marie’s Kids, Pine Forest School of the Arts, Jacksonville Harmony Chorus, Jax Treblemakers, Starchild Dec. 10 UNITY PLAZA, 220 Riverside Ave., 220-5830 Live music most every weekend

ST. AUGUSTINE

CELLAR UPSTAIRS, 157 King St., 826-1594 Brady Reich 2 p.m., Ain’t Too Proud to Beg 7 p.m. Dec. 9. Billy Buchanan 2 p.m., Mr. Natural 7 p.m. Dec. 10. Vinny Jacobs 2 p.m. Dec. 11 MARDI GRAS, 123 San Marco Ave., 823-8806 Danger Mouse 9 p.m. Dec. 9. Not Quite Dead: A Very Jerry Xmas 9 p.m. Dec. 10. Fre Gordon, acoustic open mic 7 p.m. every Sun. Justin Gurnsey, Musicians Exchange 8 p.m. every Mon. THE ORIGINAL CAFE ELEVEN, 501 A1A Beach Blvd., St. Augustine Beach, 460-9311 Paco Lipps CD release 8:30 p.m. Dec. 8 TAPS BAR & GRILL, 2220 C.R. 210, St. Johns, 819-1554 Chuck Nash 8 p.m. Dec. 7

SHANGHAI NOBBY’S, 10 Anastasia Blvd., 547-2188 Kate Hancock Dec. 9. Kyle Arnold, Cure for Pain (Morphine tribute band), Dylan Nirvana, The Bad Flowers, Bent Waves Dec. 10. Live music most weekends TEMPO, 16 Cathedral Place, 342-0286 Douglas Arrington 8 p.m. Dec. 8. Jax English Salsa Band 6 p.m. Dec. 9 & 11. Jazzy Blue, Bluez Dudez Dec. 10. Open mic 7:30 p.m. every Wed. TRADEWINDS LOUNGE, 124 Charlotte St., 829-9336 Those Guys 9 p.m. Dec. 9 & 10. Carrick, Wilson Hunter Band 9 p.m. every Wed. JP Driver 9 p.m. every Thur. Elizabeth Roth 1 p.m. every Sat. Keith Godwin & the Rio Grande Band 9 p.m. every Sun. Mark Hart, DVB 9 p.m. every Mon. Mark Hart, Those Guys 9 p.m. every Tue. Live music presented every night

SAN MARCO

JACK RABBITS, 1528 Hendricks Ave., 398-7496 Barb Wire Dolls, Askmeificare, Strange Friend 8 p.m. Dec. 8. The Fixx, Ursula 8 p.m. Dec. 10. Sabrina Carpenter, Harletson 6 p.m. Dec. 11. Blood On The Dance Floor, Tear Out The Heart, Vanity Strikes, Justin Symbol 7 p.m. Dec. 12. Vesperteen, Dash Ten, Hayden Miles, Solar Ellipses 7 p.m. Dec. 13. Continental, Digdog, Gov Club 8 p.m. Dec. 14. The Pauses, Deadaires, Flower City Conspiracy Dec. 15 MUDVILLE MUSIC ROOM, 3104 Atlantic Blvd., 352-7008 Pierce Pettis 7:30 p.m. Dec. 8. Oldies Night (Ray’s Birthday Party & Benefit For Camie) 7:30 p.m. Dec. 9. Larry Mangum’s Songwriter’s Circle 7:30 p.m. Dec. 10. Big Band Dec. 12

SOUTHSIDE + BAYMEADOWS

CORNER BISTRO & WINE BAR, 9823 Tapestry Park Circle, 619-1931 Matthew Hall 8 p.m. every Thur.-Sat. GREEK STREET CAFÉ, 3546 St. Johns Bluff Rd. S., 503-0620 Tavernalive 6 p.m. every Mon. MELLOW MUSHROOM PIZZA BAKERS, 9734 Deer Lake Ct., 997-1955 Whetherman 8 p.m. Dec. 8. Cortnie Fraser 8 p.m. Dec. 9. Barrit Duo 8 p.m. Dec. 10 WHISKEY JAX, 10915 Baymeadows Rd., 634-7208 Clay Brewer, Ivan Pulley Dec. 7. Ginger Bread Band, Go Get Gone 9:30 p.m. Dec. 9. Take Cover, Back Alley Cadillac 9:30 p.m. Dec. 10. Melissa Smith open mic every Thur. Blues jam every Sun. Country jam every Wed.

SPRINGFIELD + NORTHSIDE

BOSTON’S, 13070 City Station Dr., 751-7499 Shayne Rammler 9 p.m. Dec. 8 MELLOW MUSHROOM PIZZA BAKERS, 15170 Max Leggett Parkway, 757-8843 Live music most every weekend SANDOLLAR, 9716 Heckscher Dr., 251-2449 Live music every Fri.-Sun. SHANTYTOWN PUB, 22 W. Sixth St., 798-8222 The Punknecks Dec. 9. Interludes Jax, Bees & Enormous Trees 8 p.m. Dec. 10

_________________________________________ To list your band’s gig, please send time, date, location (street address, city), admission price, and a contact number to print to Daniel A. Brown, email dbrown@ folioweekly.com or by the U.S. Postal Service, 45 W. Bay St., Ste. 103, Jacksonville FL 32202. Events run on a spaceavailable basis. Deadline is at noon every Wednesday for the next Wednesday’s publication.

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The Mustard Seed Cafe Inside Nassau Health Foods, The Mustard Seed is Amelia Island’s only organic eatery and juice bar, with an extensive, eclectic menu featuring vegetarian and vegan items. Daily specials include local seafood, free-range chicken and fresh organic produce. Salads, wraps, sandwiches and soups are available – all prepared with our staff ’s impeccable style. Popular items are chicken or veggie quesadillas, grilled mahi, or salmon over mixed greens and tuna melt with Swiss cheese and tomato. Open for breakfast and lunch, 8 a.m.-3 p.m. Mon.-Sat. nassauhealthfoods.net

833 T.J. Courson Road 904-277-3141

The Patio Place The Patio Place features a full service wine bar and full menu for an experience that combines eclectic global tastes and drinks with a whole lot of atmosphere enjoyed by both locals and visitors. Thriving on a philosophy that features uniqueness, The Patio Place is perfect for relaxing after a workout, grabbing a quick lunch, sharing a memorable dinner out, enjoying happy hour or late evening get-togethers with friends, and having a pleasant afternoon sweet snack with coffee or tea. Stop by and discover why The Patio Place is sure you’ll decide it’s the place for you.

416 Ash Street 904-410-3717

Moon River Pizza Moon River Pizza treats customers like family. Cooked in a brick oven, the pizza is custom-made by the slice (or, of course, by the pie). Set up like an Atlanta-style pizza joint, Moon River also offers an eclectic selection of wine and beer. Open for lunch and dinner Mon.-Sat. Dine in or take it with you.

925 S. 14th Street 904-321-3400

Sliders Seaside Grill Oceanfront dining at its finest. Award-winning crab cakes, fresh daily seafood specials and homemade desserts. Sliders has Amelia Island’s only waterfront Tiki Bar, plus a children’s playground and live music every weekend. The dining experience is complete with brand-new second-story banquet facilities, bar and verandah. Open 11 a.m. daily. Make Sliders Seaside Grill your place to be for friends and family, entertainment and the best food on the East Coast. Call for your next special event.

1998 S. Fletcher Ave. 904-277-6652

Beach Diner This local diner chain has been serving great food with top-notch service in Jacksonville for 18 years. The new Amelia Island location is sure to be your new favorite! Our menu includes breakfast, salads, and sandwiches. We are open Monday through Sunday from 6 a.m.-2:30 p.m. Find us on Facebook!

2006 S. Eighth Street 904-310-3750

Cafe Karibo Homemade sandwiches, salads and soups are served in a relaxed atmosphere in this charming building in the historic district. Delicious fresh fish specials and theme nights (Pad Thai and curry), plus vegetarian dishes, are also featured. Karibrew Brew Pub & Grub – the only one on the island – offers onsite beers and great burgers and sandwiches.

27 N. Third Street 904-277-5269

29 South Eats This chic, neighborhood bistro has it all – great ambience, fantastic food, an extensive wine list and reasonable prices. The eclectic menu offers regional cuisine with a modern whimsical twist and Chef Scotty Schwartz won Best Chef in Folio Weekly’s 2007 Best of Jax readers poll. Open for lunch Tue.-Sat., 11:30 a.m.-2:30 p.m., for dinner 5:30-9:30 p.m. Mon.-Thu., till 10 p.m. Fri. & Sat. Brunch is 10 a.m.-2 p.m. Sun. 29southrestaurant.com.

29 S. Third Street 904-277-7919

Brett’s Waterway Café Overlooking Fernandina Harbor Marina, Brett’s offers an upscale atmosphere with outstanding food. The extensive luncheon and dinner menus feature daily specials, fresh Florida seafood, chicken and aged beef. Cocktails, beer and wine. Casual resort wear. Open at 11:30 a.m. daily.

Fernandina Harbor Marina at the foot of Centre Street 904-261-2660

T-Ray’s Burger Station T-Ray’s offers a variety of breakfast and lunch items. In addition to an outstanding breakfast menu, you’ll find some of the best burgers you’ve ever put in your mouth. The Burger Station offers a grilled portabello mushroom burger, grilled or fried chicken salad and much more. The spot where locals grab a bite and go! Now serving beer & wine. Open Mon.-Fri. 7 a.m.2:30 p.m., Sat. 8 a.m.-1 p.m. Closed Sundays.

202 S. Eighth Street 904-261-6310

Jack & Diane’s The locals’ favorite hangout! Dine inside or on the patio of this cozy, renovated 1887 shotgun home in historic downtown Fernandina Beach. From the crab & shrimp omelet to the steak & tomato pie, “The tastiest spot on Centre” offers food with attitude and unexpected flair. Live music elevates your dining experience to a new level. Come for breakfast, stay for dinner! You’ll love every bite!

708 Centre Street 904-321-1444

Amelia Island is 13 miles of unspoiled beaches, quaint shops, antique treasures and superb dining in a 50-block historic district less than one hour north of Jacksonville DECEMBER 7-13, 2016 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | 37

FOLIO DINING At Pinegrove Market & Deli in Avondale, you'll find great sandwiches, craft beers and Grade-A onsite butcher services. photo by Dennis Ho

AMELIA ISLAND + FERNANDINA BEACH

29 SOUTH EATS, 29 S. Third St., 277-7919, 29southrest aurant.com. Historic downtown bistro’s Chef Scotty Schwartz serves traditional regional cuisine with a modern twist. $$ L Tu-Sa; D M.-Sa; R Sa BEACH DINER, 2006 S. Eighth St., 310-3750, beachdiner. com. Innovative breakfast: Eggs on the Bayou, fish-n-grits; French toast, riders, omelets. Lunch fare: salads, burgers, sandwiches, shrimp & crabmeat salad. $ K TO B R L Daily BRETT’S WATERWAY CAFÉ, 1 S. Front St., 261-2660. F On the water at Centre Street’s end, it’s Southern hospitality in an upscale atmosphere; daily specials, fresh local seafood, aged beef. $$$ FB L D Daily CAFÉ KARIBO, 27 N. Third St., 277-5269, cafekaribo.com. F In historic building, family-owned café has worldly fare, madefrom-scratch dressings, sauces, desserts, sourcing fresh greens, veggies, seafood. Dine inside or al fresco under oak-shaded patio. Microbrew Karibrew Pub next door has beer brewed onsite, imports. $$ FB K TO R, Su; L Daily, D Tu-Su in season CHEZ LEZAN BAKERY CO., 1014 Atlantic Ave., 491-4663, chezlezanbakery.com. Fresh European-style breads, pastries: croissants, muffins, cakes, pies. $ TO B R L Daily THE CRAB TRAP, 31 N. Second St., 261-4749, ameliacrabtrap .com. F Nearly 40 years, family-owned-and-operated. Fresh local seafood, steaks, specials. HH. $$ FB L D Daily DAVID’S Restaurant & Lounge, 802 Ash St., 310-6049, amelia islanddavids.com. Steaks, fresh seafood, rack of lamb and ribeye, Chilean sea bass, in an upscale atmosphere. Chef Wesley Cox has a new lounge menu. $$$$ FB D Nightly DICK’S WINGS & GRILL, 474313 E. S.R. 200, 310-6945. 2016 Best of Jax Winner. SEE ORANGE PARK.

JACK & DIANE’S, 708 Centre St., 321-1444, jackanddianes cafe.com. F Renovated 1887 shotgun house. Faves: jambalaya, French toast, pancakes, mac & cheese, crêpes. Vegan items. Inside or porch overlooking historic area. $$ BW K TO B L D Daily LA MANCHA, 2709 Sadler Rd., 261-4646. Spanish, Portuguese fare, Brazilian flair. Tapas, seafood, steaks, sangria. Drink specials. AYCE paella Sun. $$$ FB K TO D Nightly LARRY’S Subs, 474272 S.R. 200, 844-2225. F SEE ORANGE PARK. LECHONERA EL COQUÍ, 232 N. Second St., 432-7545. New Puerto Rican place. Chulleta kan kan (pork chops), Tripletta churosco sandwich, more. $ FB TO L D Tu-Su MOON RIVER PIZZA, 925 S. 14th St., 321-3400, moonriver pizza.net. F 2016 Best of Jax Winner. Authentic Northern-style pizzas, 20+ toppings, pie/slice. Calzones, salads. $ BW TO L D M-Sa THE MUSTARD SEED CAFÉ, 833 Courson Rd., 277-3141, nassaushealthfoods.net. Casual organic eatery, juice bar, in Nassau Health Foods. All-natural organic items, smoothies, juices, herbal teas, coffees, daily specials. $$ K TO B L M-Sa THE PATIO PLACE, 416 Ash St., 410-3717, patioplacebistro. com. Bistro/wine bar/crêperie’s menu of global fare uses crêpes: starters, entrées, shareables, desserts. $$ BW TO B L D Tu-Su

DINING DIRECTORY KEY AVERAGE ENTRÉE COST $ $$

< $10 $ 10-$20

$$$ $$$$

20-$35 > $35

ABBREVIATIONS & SPECIAL NOTES BW = Beer/Wine FB = Full Bar K = Kids’ Menu TO = Take Out B = Breakfast R = Brunch L = Lunch D = Dinner

Bite Club = Hosted Free Folio Weekly Bite Club Event F = Folio Weekly Distribution Spot

To list your restaurant, call your account manager or call or text SAM TAYLOR, Folio Weekly publisher, at 904-860-2465 (email: staylor@folioweekly.com). 38 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | DECEMBER 7-13, 2016

POINTE Restaurant, 98 S. Fletcher Ave., 277-4851, elizabeth pointelodge.com. 2016 Best of Jax Winner. In award-winning inn Elizabeth Pointe Lodge. Seaside dining, open to public. Dine in or out. Hot buffet breakfast daily, full lunch menu. Homestyle soups, specialty sandwiches, salads, desserts. $$$ BW K B L D Daily THE SALTY PELICAN BAR & GRILL, 12 N. Front St., 277-3811, thesaltypelicanamelia.com. F 2016 Best of Jax Winner. 2nd-story outdoor bar. Owners T.J. & Al offer local seafood, fish tacos, Mayport shrimp, po’boys, cheese oysters. $$ FB K L D Daily SLIDERS SEASIDE GRILL, 1998 S. Fletcher Ave., 277-6652, slidersseaside.com. F 2016 Best of Jax Winner. Oceanfront. Award-winning handmade crabcakes, fried pickles, fresh seafood. Open-air 2nd floor, balcony, playground. $$ FB K L D Daily T-RAY’S BURGER STATION, 202 S. Eighth St., 261-6310. F Family-owned-and-operated 18+ years. Blue plate specials, burgers, biscuits & gravy, shrimp. $ BW TO B L M-Sa

ARLINGTON + REGENCY

DICK’S WINGS, 9119 Merrill Rd., Ste. 19, 745-9300. 2016 Best of Jax Winner. SEE ORANGE PARK.

LARRY’S GIANT SUBS, 1301 Monument Rd., Ste. 5, 7245802. F SEE ORANGE PARK. SID & LINDA’S SEAFOOD MARKET & RESTAURANT, 12220 Atlantic Blvd., Ste. 109, 503-8276. Pick a whole fresh fish, have it cleaned, filleted, cooked to order. Dine in, take out. Housemade sauces. $$ K TO L D Daily

AVONDALE + ORTEGA

CHOMP CHOMP, 4162 Herschel St., 329-1679. Relocated. Chef-inspired: The Philadelphia Experiment (sweet pork over arugula), panko-crusted chicken, burgers, Waldorf salad, bahn mi, Southern fried chicken, The Come Up (portabella mushroom, green tomato salsa, almonds). Curry Chomp chips, pasta salad. HH. $ BW L D Mon.-Sat. THE FOX RESTAURANT, 3580 St. Johns Ave., 387-2669. Owners Ian and Mary Chase offer fresh fare, homemade desserts. Breakfast all day; signature items: burgers, meatloaf, fried green tomatoes. $$ BW K L D Daily HARPOON LOUIE’S, 4070 Herschel St., Ste. 8, 389-5631, harpoonlouies.net. F Locally owned & operated 20+ years. American pub. 1/2-lb. burgers, fish sandwiches, pasta. Local beers, HH. $$ FB K TO L D Daily MELLOW MUSHROOM, 3611 St. Johns Ave., 388-0200. F Bite Club. 2016 Best of Jax Winner. SEE BEACHES.

PINEGROVE MARKET & DELI, 1511 PineGrove Ave., 389-8655, pinegrovemarket.com. F 2016 Best of Jax Winner. 40+ years. Burgers, Cubans, subs, wraps. Onsite butcher, USDA choice prime aged beef. Craft beers. Fri. & Sat. fish fry. $ BW TO B L D M-Sa RESTAURANT ORSAY, 3630 Park St., 381-0909, restaurant orsay.com. 2016 Best of Jax Winner. French/Southern bistro; local organic ingredients. Steak frites, mussels, pork chops. $$$ FB R, Su; D Nightly SIMPLY SARA’S, 2902 Corinthian Ave., 387-1000, simplysaras.net. F Down-home fare from scratch: eggplant fries, pimento cheese, baked chicken, fruit cobblers, chicken & dumplings, desserts. BYOB. $$ K TO L D Tu-Sa, B Sa

BAYMEADOWS

AL’S PIZZA, 8060 Philips Hwy., Ste. 105, 731-4300. F 2016 Best of Jax Winner. SEE BEACHES.

INDIA’S RESTAURANT, 9802 Baymeadows Rd., Ste. 8, 620-0777, indiajax.com. F 2016 Best of Jax Winner. Authentic cuisine, lunch buffet. Curries, vegetables, lamb, chicken, shrimp, fish tandoori. $$ BW L M-Sa; D Nightly LARRY’S Subs, 8616 Baymeadows Rd., 739-2498. F SEE O. PARK. METRO DINER, 9802 Baymeadows Rd., 425-9142. F 2016 Best of Jax Winner. SEE SAN MARCO.

NATIVE SUN Natural Foods Market & Deli, 11030 Baymeadows Rd., 260-2791. 2016 Best of Jax Winner. SEE MANDARIN. THE WELL WATERING HOLE, 3928 Baymeadows Rd., Ste. 9, 737-7740, thewellwateringhole.com. Local craft beers, glass/ bottle wines. Meatloaf sandwich, pulled Peruvian chicken, vegan black bean burgers. $$ BW K TO L M-F; D Tu-Sa TEQUILAS, 10915 Baymeadows Rd., Ste. 101, 363-1365, tequilasjacksonville.com. New Mexican place has casa-style dishes made with fresh, spicy hot ingredients. Vegetarian option. Top-shelf tequilas, drink specials. $$ FB K TO L D Daily WHISKEY JAX, 10915 Baymeadows Rd., Ste. 135, 634-7208, whiskeyjax.com. Gastropub. Craft beers, gourmet burgers, handhelds, street fare tacos, signature plates, whiskey. HH. $$ FB L D F-Su; D Nightly

DINING DIRECTORY BEACHES (Venues are in Jax Beach unless otherwise noted.)

AL’S PIZZA, 303 Atlantic Blvd., Atlantic Beach, 249-0002, alspizza.com. F 2016 Best of Jax Winner. NY-style gourmet pizzas, baked dishes. 28+ years. All day HH M-Thu. $ FB K TO L D Daily ANGIE’S SUBS, 1436 Beach Blvd., 246-2519. ANGIE’S Grom Subs, 204 Third Ave. S., 241-3663. Subs made with fresh ingredients, 25+ years. Huge salads, blue-ribbon iced tea. Grom has Sun. brunch, no alcohol. $ K BW TO L D Daily BEACH DINER, 501 Atlantic Blvd., AB, 249-6500. SEE AMELIA. BEACH HUT CAFÉ, 1281 Third St. S., 249-3516. 28+ years. Full breakfast menu served all day (darn good grits); hot plate specials Mon.-Fri. $ K TO B R L Daily CRUISERS GRILL, 319 23rd Ave. S., 270-0356, cruisersgrill. com. 2016 Best of Jax Winner. Locally owned & operated 20+ years. Half-pound burgers, fish sandwiches, big salads, awardwinning cheddar fries, sangria. $ BW K TO L D Daily EUROPEAN STREET CAFÉ, 992 Beach Blvd., 249-3001, europeanstreet.com. F SEE RIVERSIDE. FAMOUS TOASTERY, 311 N. Third St., 372-0712, famous toastery.com. New place has breakfast and lunch: corned beef hash, gluten-free pancakes, bacon, omelets, eggs, toast. Wraps, Bloody Marys, mimosas, peach Bellini. $$ FB K TO B L Daily THE FISH COMPANY Restaurant, 725 Atlantic Blvd., Ste. 12, AB, 246-0123, thefishcojax.com. Bite Club. Casual. Oyster raw bar, fresh local seafood, Mayport shrimp, crab, lobster. Homestyle desserts. Patio; all-day HH Sun. $$ FB K TO L D Daily FLAMING SEAFOOD & SHAO KAO BBQ, 1289 Penman Rd., 853-6398. New place (is it Chinese? Barbecue? Seafood?) serves meats and vegetables, spiced, skewered on bamboo sticks – like Chinese street food. $ BW TO L D Daily FLYING IGUANA Taqueria & Tequila Bar, 207 Atlantic Blvd., NB, 853-5680, flyingiguana.com. F Latin American: tacos, seafood, carnitas, Cubana fare. 100+ tequilas. $ FB TO L D Daily GUSTO, 1266 Beach Blvd., 372-9925, gustojax.com. Classic Old World Roman cuisine, large Italian menu: homestyle pasta, beef, chicken, fish delicacies; open pizza-tossing kitchen. Reservations encouraged. $$ FB TO L R D Tu-Su THE HASH HOUSE, 610 Third St. S., 422-0644, thelovingcup hashhouse.com. New place offers locally sourced fare, locally roasted coffees, gluten-free, vegan, vegetarian dishes – no GMOs or hormones. $ K TO B R L Daily LARRY’S Subs, 657 Third St. N., 247-9620. F SEE ORANGE PARK. MELLOW MUSHROOM Pizza Bakers, 1018 Third St. N., Ste. 2, 241-5600, mellowmushroom.com. F Bite Club. 2016 Best of Jax Winner. Hoagies, gourmet pizzas: Mighty Meaty, vegetarian, Kosmic Karma. 35 tap beers. Nonstop HH. $ FB K TO L D Daily METRO DINER, 1534 3rd St. N., 853-6817. F 2016 Best of Jax Winner. SEE SAN MARCO.

M SHACK, 299 Atlantic Blvd., AB, 241-2599, mshackburgers. com. David and Matthew Medure flip burgers, hot dogs, fries, shakes. Dine in or out. $$ BW L D Daily NATIVE SUN NATURAL FOODS MARKET & DELI, 1585 Third St. N., 458-1390. 2016 Best of Jax Winner. SEE MANDARIN.

DOWNTOWN

AKEL’S DELICATESSEN, 21 W. Church St., 665-7324. 50 N. Laura St., Ste. 125, 446-3119, akelsdeli.com. F NYC-style deli. Fresh subs, sandwiches, burgers, gyros, wraps, vegetarian, breakfast, signature dressings. $ K TO B L M-F CANDY APPLE CAFÉ & COCKTAILS, 400 N. Hogan, 353-9717, thecandyapplecafeandcocktails.com. Chef-driven Southern/ French cuisine, sandwiches, entrées. $$ FB K L Daily; D Tu-Sa CASA DORA, 108 E. Forsyth St., 356-8282, casadoraitalian. com. F Chef Sam Hamidi serves Italian fare, 40+ years: veal, seafood, pizza. Homemade salad dressing. $ BW K L M-F; D M-Sa FIONN MACCOOL’S IRISH PUB & RESTAURANT, Jax Landing, Ste. 176, 374-1547, fionnmacs.com. Casual dining, uptown Irish atmosphere; fish & chips, Guinness lamb stew, black-andtan brownies. $$ FB K L D Daily INDOCHINE, 21 E. Adams St., Ste. 200, 598-5303, indochine jax.com. 2016 Best of Jax Winner. Thai, Southeast Asian cuisine. Signature dishes: chicken Satay, soft shell crab; mango, sticky rice dessert. $$ FB TO L D M-F; D Tu-Sa OLIO MARKET, 301 E. Bay St., 356-7100, oliomarket.com. F From-scratch soups, sandwiches. Duck grilled cheese, seen on Best Sandwich in America. $$ BW TO B R L M-F; D F & Sa URBAN GRIND COFFEE COMPANY, 45 W. Bay, Ste. 102, 866-395-3954, 516-7799, urbangrind.coffee. Locally roasted whole bean brewed coffees, espressos, pastries, smoothies, bagels, cream cheeses. Chicken/tuna salad, sandwiches. WiFi. $ B L M-F. URBAN GRIND EXPRESS, 50 W. Laura, 516-7799. SEE ABOVE. ZODIAC BAR & GRILL, 120 W. Adams St., 354-8283, thezodiacbarandgrill.com. 16+ years. Mediterranean cuisine, American fare, paninis, vegetarian dishes. Daily lunch buffet. Espressos, hookahs. HH M-F $ FB L M-F; D W-Sa

FLEMING ISLAND

DICK’S WINGS, 1803 East-West Parkway, 375-2559. 2016 Best of Jax Winner. SEE ORANGE PARK.

GRASSROOTS Natural Market, 1915 East-West Parkway, 541-0009. F SEE RIVERSIDE. MELLOW MUSHROOM, 1800 Town Ctr. Blvd., 541-1999. F Bite Club. 2016 Best of Jax Winner. SEE BEACHES.

TAPS Bar & Grill, 1605 C.R. 220, Ste. 145, 278-9421, tapspub lichouse.com. 2016 Best of Jax Winner. 50+ premium domestic, import tap beers. Burgers, sandwiches, entrées. $$ FB K L D Daily WHITEY’S FISH CAMP, 2032 C.R. 220, 269-4198, whiteysfish camp.com. F Real fish camp. Gator tail, freshwater catfish, daily specials, on Swimming Pen Creek. Tiki bar. Come by boat, bike or car. $ FB K TO L Tu-Su; D Nightly

GRILL ME!

NICK RUST

MOJO Kitchen

1500 Beach Blvd., Ste 111 • Jax Beach Born in: Columbus, Indiana Years in the Biz: 20 Fave Restaurant: Primi Piatti Fave Cuisine Style: Italian Fave Ingredients: Oregano, cilantro Ideal Meal: Chicken parm with alfredo pasta and grilled zucchini Will Not Cross My Lips: Cow tongue Insider's Secret: Patience! Celeb Sighting (at my place): Julius Thomas Taste Treat: Poached pears

PARSONS SEAFOOD RESTAURANT, 1451 Atlantic Blvd., Neptune Beach, 595-5789, parsonsseafoodrestaurant. com. The landmark place just moved; still serving local seafood dishes, sides, specialty fare. $$ FB K TO L D Tu-Su POE’S TAVERN, 363 Atlantic Blvd., AB, 241-7637, poestavern. com. Gastropub, 50+ beers, burgers, fries, fish tacos, Edgar’s Drunken Chili, daily fish sandwich special. $$ FB K L D Daily RAGTIME TAVERN SEAFOOD & GRILL, 207 Atlantic Blvd., Atlantic Beach, 241-7877, ragtimetavern.com. F 30+ years, iconic seafood place. Blackened snapper, sesame tuna, Ragtime shrimp. Daily HH, brunch Sun. $$ FB L D Daily SALT LIFE FOOD SHACK, 1018 Third St. N., 372-4456, saltlifefoodshack.com. Specialty items, tuna poke bowl, fresh sushi, Ensenada tacos, local fried shrimp. $$ FB K TO L D Daily SEACHASERS, 831 First St. N., 372-0444, seachasers.com. New place; four areas: First Street Bar, Music Room, Beach Bar, Dining Room. Daily HH. In or on patio. $$ FB L D Daily SLIDERS SEAFOOD GRILLE & OYSTER BAR, 218 First St., NB, 246-0881, slidersseafoodgrille.com. Beach-casual spot. Faves: Fresh fish tacos, gumbo. Key lime pie, ice cream sandwiches. Brunch Sun. $$ FB K L Sa/Su; D Nightly SURFWICHES SANDWICH SHOP, 1537 Penman Rd., 241-6996, surfwiches.com. Craft sandwich shop. Yankeestyle steak sandwiches, hoagies, all made to order. $ BW TO K L D Daily THIS CHICK’S KITCHEN, 353 Sixth Ave. S., 778-5404, thischickskitchen.com. Farm-to-table restaurant serving healthful, locally sourced clean meals. Gluten-free, vegan, vegetarian options. $$ TO L D W-Sa V PIZZA, 528 First St. N., 853-6633, vpizza.com. Traditional Neapolitana artisan pizza from Naples – Italy, not Florida, made with fresh ingredients. $$ FB TO L D Daily

BITE-SIZED

CAMDEN COUNTY, GEORGIA

CAPTAIN STAN’S SMOKEHOUSE, 700 Bedell Dr., Woodbine, 912-729-9552 All manner of barbecue, plus sides, hot dogs, burgers, desserts. Dine inside or out on picnic tables. $$ FB K TO L & D Tu-Sa

INTRACOASTAL WEST

AL’S PIZZA, 14286 Beach Blvd., Ste. 31, 223-0991. F 2016 Best of Jax Winner. SEE BEACHES.

DICK’S WINGS, 14286 Beach Blvd., Ste. 32, 223-0115. 2016 Best of Jax Winner. SEE ORANGE PARK.

GERMAN SCHNITZEL HAUS, 13475 Atlantic Blvd., Ste. 40, 221-9700, germanjax.com. Authentic German/fusion fare: schnitzels, plus bratwurst, stroganoff, käsesspätzle. 13 German beers in bottles, on tap. Bar bites, cocktails. Outdoor BierGarten. HH Tu-Thur. $$ FB L & D Tu-Su LARRY’S, 10750 Atlantic Blvd., Ste. 14, 642-6980. F SEE O.PARK. SURFWICHES SANDWICH SHOP, 14286 Beach Blvd., Ste. 29, 559-5301. SEE BEACHES.

MANDARIN + NW ST. JOHNS

AKEL’S DELI, 12926 Gr +nbay Pkwy. W., 880-2008. F SEE DOWNTOWN.

AL’S PIZZA, 11190 San Jose Blvd., 260-4115. F 2016 Best of Jax Winner. SEE BEACHES.

BEACH Diner, 11362 San Jose Blvd., 683-0079. SEE AMELIA. CRUISERS, 5613 San Jose Blvd., 737-2874. 2016 Best of Jax Winner. SEE BEACHES.

DICK’S WINGS, 100 Marketside Ave., 829-8134. 965 S.R. 16, 825-4540. 1610 University Blvd. W., 448-2110. 10391 Old St. Augustine, 880-7087. 2016 Best of Jax Winner. SEE ORANGE PARK.

ENZA’S ITALIAN RESTAURANT, 10601 San Jose Blvd., Ste. 109, 268-4458, enzas.net. Family-owned place serves Italian cuisine, veal, seafood, specials. $$$ FB K TO D Tu-Su FIRST COAST DELI & GRILL, 6082 St. Augustine Rd., 733-7477. Pancakes, bacon, sandwiches, burgers, wings. $ K TO B L Daily JAX DINER, 5065 St. Augustine Rd.,739-7070. New spot

GASSED UP & READY TO

ROLL

St. Augustine spot is a DESTINATION in itself IF YOU’RE HEADING DOWN THE HIGHWAY looking for some grub, pull on into GAS Full Service Restaurant for a classic meal. When you walk in, you’ll be greeted by a delightful host. Settle in and grab a local brew; you’ll have plenty to choose from. The cute interior sports lots of signs and 1950s-esque paraphernalia. The menu features salads, apps and a large selection of to-die-for burgers. They don’t just do burgers beautifully; they’ve also got imagination. For example, the Reuben egg rolls ($9) are a creation full of flavor. I’ve had other Reuben egg rolls and all pale in comparison to these goldenbrown beauties. While some Negative Nancys might call them Jewish Deli Abominations, I call them travel-sized versions of a classic sandwich. The traditionally crispy eggroll creates a nice shell for a filling of minced corned beef, tangy sauerkraut and melty cheese. An order is accompanied by a housemade Russian dressing that you may find yourself pouring on more than just the Reuben rolls.

BITE-SIZED GAS FULL SERVICE RESTAURANT

9 Anastasia Blvd., Ste. C, St. Augustine, 217-0326, facebook.com/gasfullservice After you’ve had your Reuben fix, get back to the menu. If you’re into food that pushes back, check out the Jalapeño burger ($14.50). This is a monster of a burger with two patties in one, and it’s only cooked to medium, to give you the perfect cheesey, jalapeño center. User experience warning here! It’s gonna be hot, and the molten jalapeño cheese center may explode on overzealous eaters. The jalapeño is definitely a heat that builds, but spice lovers will revel in it. In fact, it may be one of the most exciting burgers you’ve ever had! It was hard to choose a second dish, because everything looked so good, like the Hot Rod Chicken Sandwich ($10.50), which features a large piece of fried chicken dressed in buffalo sauce. However, I tend to never turn down the daily special. On this day, it was a fresh cobia fish sandwich ($12). Cobia is comparable to black kingfish, and at GAS you can get it grilled, blackened or sautéed. I’ve decided that the naturally fishy taste of cobia needs lemon, and GAS was way ahead of me, including several wedges. The fish was sandwiched between the excellent housemade rolls GAS is known for. Each entrée includes with your choice of chips, coleslaw or fries. We decided on fries and chips, both winners. I was more partial to the fries, while my dining partner was a fan of the chips’ waffle shape. Ahhh, dessert time! It’s nearly perfect bread pudding weather, the time of year you crave a warm, gooey, rich dessert — and the Turtle Bread Pudding ($7) at GAS doesn’t disappoint. In fact, the huge portion is almost too rich. This version of bread pudding has whiskey cream drizzled over the top. You may wish you had a glass of scotch to accompany it. Even if the food wasn’t excellent at GAS and, make no mistake, it is terrific, it wouldn’t matter. The décor and folks who serve make the dining experience worthwhile. But, for the record, the fare is excellent and they have the cred to prove it. With a Slow Food Certification for sourcing as locally as possible, and plenty of awards for taste, GAS really lives up to the hype. Brentley Stead biteclub@folioweekly.com DECEMBER 7-13, 2016 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | 39

DINING DIRECTORY PINT-SIZED Stuff those STOCKINGS like k your ancestors did

serves local produce, meats, breads, seafood. $ TO B L Daily METRO DINER, 12807 San Jose Blvd., 638-6185. F 2016 Best of Jax Winner. Dinner nightly. SEE SAN MARCO. NATIVE SUN NATURAL FOODS MARKET & DELI, 10000 San Jose Blvd., 260-6950, nativesunjax.com. F 2016 Best of Jax Winner. Organic soups, baked items, sandwiches, prepared foods. Juice, smoothie, coffee bar. All-natural organic beer/wine. $ BW TO K B L D Daily TAPS BAR & GRILL, 2220 C.R. 210 W., Ste. 314, 819-1554.

Make your next visit to Neptune Beach a real treat with the fine cuisine available at Mezza. photo by Dennis Ho

2016 Best of Jax Winner. SEE FLEMING ISLAND.

TRADITIONALLY

BUZZED TRADITION IS A RECURRING THEME IN THE brewing industry and the holiday season is arguably the most traditional of all seasons. Many cultures attribute particular importance to the weeks surrounding the winter solstice; accordingly, the holidays are often celebrated with beer, dark, strong beer. Perhaps the earliest of these celebrations was the Scandinavian Jul, or Yule festivities, which began on December 21. Vikings would offer up flagons of beer to Norse gods Odin, Frey and others in thanks for an abundant year and to ensure an equally plentiful coming year. The beer brewed by the Vikings was strong, malty and likely flavored with local herbs and spices like heather flowers, juniper berries, yarrow and hops. The alcohol content was likely around 9 to 10 percent. When Christianity replaced paganism under Norway’s King Haakon I (“The Good”), Jul became Kristmesse celebrated on December 25. Haakon decreed each household must brew enough strong beer for the celebration. Later, in the 13th century, laws were passed that required peasants to not only brew beer for the celebration, but to hold some sort of party to celebrate. Failure to comply could result in fines and even loss of property. In England, the tradition of Christmas ales has roots in the custom of wassailing. Legend tells of Rowena, a young, beautiful Saxon maiden who seduced King Vortigern by toasting his health with a goblet of spiced wine and saying, “Waes hael!” Wassailing later came to mean singing for Christmas treats and was traditionally done on Twelfth Night, the evening of January 5, the date Christianity associates with Magi visiting the newborn Jesus Christ. On this night, peasants would sing in front of the feudal lord’s home for figgy pudding and a wassail drink, sometimes made of strong hard cider or dark, strong ales. The actual drink known as wassail varied from location to location, but a popular one was known as “Lambs Wool.” The recipe consisted of hot ale, roasted crab apples, sugar, spices, eggs and cream. Like the Vikings, the English added herbs and spices to beer to boost the flavor. Unlike their northern neighbors, the Brits did not add the spices during brewing, only after. Adding spices to the warmed beer eventually gave way over the years to including spices in the brewing process. Through a combination of the Viking tradition of brewing strong, dark ales during the Christmas season and the British tradition of adding spices, winter warmers – so named for the high alcohol content’s warming properties – were born. Today winter warmers and Christmas ales include many spices and flavors ranging from gingerbread to cranberry. Try these holiday season brews to put you in the yuletide spirit:

PINT-SIZED

ANDERSON VALLEY BREWING COMPANY WINTER SOLSTICE On the lighter side of Winter Warmers, this brew weighs in at 6.9 percent. The flavor is full-on jolly holiday with sweet malts and a proprietary blend of spices. 21ST AMENDMENT BREWERY FIRESIDE CHAT Brewed with spices and cocoa nibs, this 7.9 percent spiced ale is sure to warm you up on the insides while satisfying your holiday sweets cravings. NØGNE Ø WINTER ALE Perhaps the most authentic Christmas ale on my list, this ale is brewed in Norway with the traditional style in mind. Thick with sweet caramel, chocolate and coffee flavors, this dark ale boasts an ABV of 8.5 percent. Marc Wisdom marc@folioweekly.com 40 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | DECEMBER 7-13, 2016

V PIZZA, 12601 San Jose Blvd., 647-9424. SEE SAN MARCO. WHOLE FOODS MARKET, 10601 San Jose, Ste. 22, 288-1100, wholefoodsmarket.com. Prepared-food department, 80+ items, full-service/self-service bars: hot, salad, soup, dessert. Pizza, sushi, sandwich stations. Grapes, Hops & Grinds bar serves wines, beers (craft/tap), coffees. $$ BW K TO B L D Daily

ORANGE PARK

DICK’S WINGS & GRILL, 6055 Youngerman Cir., 778-1101, dickswingsandgrill.com. 2016 Best of Jax Winner. NASCARthemed restaurant serves 365 varieties of wings, plus halfpound burgers, ribs, salads. $ FB K TO L D Daily THE HILLTOP, 2030 Wells Rd., 272-5959, hilltop-club.com. Southern fine dining. New Orleans shrimp, certified Black Angus prime rib, she-crab soup, desserts. Extensive bourbon selection. $$$ FB D Tu-Sa LARRY’S GIANT SUBS, 1330 Blanding Blvd., Ste. 165, 276-7370. 1545 C.R. 220, 278-2827. 700 Blanding Blvd., Ste. 15, 272-3553. 5733 Roosevelt, 446-9500. 1401 S. Orange Ave., Green Cove, 284-7789, larryssubs.com. F All over the area, Larry’s piles ’em high, serves ’em fast; 36+ years. Hot & cold subs, soups. Some Larry’s serve breakfast. $ K TO B L D Daily METRO DINER, 2034 Kingsley Ave., 375-8548. F 2016 Best of Jax Winner. Dinner nightly. SEE SAN MARCO. THE ROADHOUSE, 231 Blanding Blvd., 264-0611, roadhouse online.net. Sandwiches, wings, burgers and quesadillas for 35+ years. 75+ imported beers. $ FB L D Daily THE URBAN BEAN COFFEEHOUSE CAFÉ, 2023 Park Ave., 541-4938, theurbanbeancoffeehouse.com. Locally-owned-&operated. Coffee, espresso, smoothies, teas. Omelets, bagels, paninis, flatbread, hummus, salads, desserts. $$ K TO B L D Daily

PONTE VEDRA BEACH

AL’S PIZZA, 635 A1A, 543-1494. F 2016 Best of Jax Winner. SEE BEACHES.

BEACH DINER, 880 A1A N., Ste. 2, 273-6545. SEE AMELIA. LARRY’S SUBS, 830 A1A N., Ste. 6, 273-3993. F SEE O.PARK. METRO DINER, 340 Front St., Ste. 700, 513-8422. F 2016 Best of Jax Winner. SEE SAN MARCO.

TRASCA & CO. EATERY, 155 Tourside Dr., Ste. 1500, 395-3989, trascaandco.com. Handcrafted Italian-inspired sandwiches, craft beers (many locals), craft coffees. $$ BW TO L R D Daily

RIVERSIDE, 5 PTS + WESTSIDE

13 GYPSIES, 887 Stockton St., 389-0330, 13gypsies.com. 2016 Best of Jax Winner. Authentic Mediterranean cuisine: chorizo, tapas, blackened cod, pork skewers, coconut mango curry chicken. Breads from scratch onsite. $$ BW L D Tu-Sa, R Sa AL’S PIZZA, 1620 Margaret St., Ste. 201, 388-8384. F 2016 Best of Jax Winner. SEE BEACHES.

BLACK SHEEP, 1534 Oak St., 355-3793, blacksheep5points. com. 2016 Best of Jax Winner. New American, Southern; local source ingredients. Daily specials, rooftop bar. HH. $$$ FB R Sa & Su; L M-F; D Nightly BREW FIVE POINTS, 1024 Park St., 714-3402, brewfive points.com. F Local craft beers, espresso, coffees, wine. Rotating drafts, 75+ can craft beers, tea. Waffles, toasts, desserts, coffees. $$ BW K B L Daily; late nite Tu-Sa BRIXX WOOD FIRED PIZZA, 220 Riverside Ave., 300-3928, brixxpizza.com. New place offers pizzas, pastas, soups. Gluten-free options. Daily specials, buy-one-get-one pizzas 10 p.m.-close. $$ FB K TO L D Daily CORNER TACO, 818 Post St., 240-0412, cornertaco.com. Made-from-scratch “Mexclectic street food,” tacos, nachos, gluten-free, vegetarian options. $ BW L D Tu-Su CUMMER CAFÉ, Cummer Museum of Art & Gardens, 829 Riverside Ave., 356-6857, cummer.org. 2016 Best of Jax Winner. Light lunch, quick bites, locally roasted coffee, espresso-based beverages, homemade soups, sandwiches, gourmet desserts, daily specials. Dine in or in gardens. $ BW K L D Tu; L W-Su DERBY ON PARK, 1068 Park St., 379-3343, derbyonpark. net. New American cuisine, upscale retro in historic building. Oak Street Toast, shrimp & grits, lobster bites, 10-oz. gourmet burger. Dine inside or out. $$ FB TO Brunch Sa/Su; B, L D Tu-Su EUROPEAN STREET CAFÉ, 2753 Park St., 384-9999. 130+ import beers, 20 on tap. Sandwiches. Outside dining at some EStreets. $ BW K L D Daily GRASSROOTS NATURAL MARKET, 2007 Park St., 384-4474, thegrassrootsmarket.com. F Juice bar uses certified organic fruits, veggies. Artisanal cheeses, 300 craft, import beers, 50 organic wines, produce, meats, vitamins, herbs, wraps, sides, sandwiches. $ BW TO B L D Daily HAWKERS ASIAN Street Fare, 1001 Park St., 508-0342, hawkerstreetfare.com. 2016 Best of Jax Winner. Authentic dishes from mobile stalls: BBQ pork char sui, beef haw fun, Hawkers baos, chow faan, grilled Hawker skewers. $ BW TO L D Daily HOBNOB, 220 Riverside Ave., Ste. 110, 513-4272, hobnob withus.com. Unity Plaza. Global inspiration, local intention – ahi poke tuna, jumbo lump crab tacos. $$ FB TO R L D Daily IL DESCO, 2665 Park St., 290-6711, ildescojax.com. Authentic Italian cuisine, like wood-fired pizzas, pasta made daily onsite, baked Italian dishes, raw bar, spaghetti tacos. Daily HH. $$-$$$ FB K TO L D Daily JOHNNY’S Deli & Grille, 474 Riverside Ave., 356-8055. F Casual spot; made-to-order sandwiches, wraps, breakfast. $ TO B L M-Sa KNEAD BAKESHOP, 1173 Edgewood Ave. S., 634-7617. Locally owned, family-run shop specializing in made-fromscratch creations – classic pastries, artisan breads, savory pies, specialty sandwiches, soups. $ TO B L Tu-Su

LARRY’S SUBS, 1509 Margaret, 674-2794. 7895 Normandy, 781-7600. 8102 Blanding, 779-1933. F SEE ORANGE PARK. LITTLE JOE’S Café, 245 Riverside Ave., Ste. 195, 791-3336. Riverview café. Soups, signature salad dressings. $ TO B L M-F METRO DINER, 4495 Roosevelt Blvd., 999-4600. F 2016 Best of Jax Winner. SEE SAN MARCO.

MOON RIVER PIZZA, 1176 Edgewood Ave. S., 389-4442. F 2016 Best of Jax Winner.ret St., 423-1283. SEE BEACHES. RAIN DOGS, 1045 Park St., 379-4969. 2016 Best of Jax Winner. Local-centric bar food: boiled peanuts, hummus, chili, cheese plate, pork sliders, nachos, herbivore items. $ D Nightly SOUTHERN ROOTS Filling Station, 1275 King St., 513-4726, southernrootsjax.com. 2016 Best of Jax Winner. Fresh, light vegan fare; local, organic ingredients. Specials, on bread, local greens/rice, change daily. Sandwiches, coffees, teas. $ Tu-Su SUSHI CAFÉ, 2025 Riverside Ave., Ste. 204, 384-2888, sushi cafejax.com. F 2016 Best of Jax Winner. Monster, Rock-n-Roll, Dynamite Roll. Hibachi, tempura, katsu, teriyaki. Indoors or patio dining. $$ BW L D Daily

ST. AUGUSTINE

AL’S PIZZA, 1 St. George St., 824-4383. F 2016 Best of Jax Winner. SEE BEACHES.

CRUISERS GRILL, 3 St. George St., 824-6993. 2016 Best of Jax

Winner. SEE BEACHES.

DICK’S WINGS & GRILL, 4010 U.S. 1 S., 547-2669. 2016 Best of Jax Winner. SEE ORANGE PARK.

THE FLORIDIAN, 72 Spanish St., 829-0655, thefloridianstaug. com. 2016 Best of Jax Winner. Updated Southern fare; fresh, local ingredients sourced from area farms. Vegetarian, gluten-free option. Signature fried green tomato bruschetta, blackened fish cornbread stack; grits w/shrimp/fish/tofu. $$$ BW K TO L D W-M GAS FULL SERVICE Restaurant, 9 Anastasia Blvd., Ste. C, 217-0326. Changing menu; fresh, local, homemade. Meatloaf, veggie/traditional burgers, seafood, steaks; seasonal, daily specials, made-from-scratch desserts. $$ BW K TO L D Tu-Sa GYPSY CAB COMPANY, 828 Anastasia Blvd., 824-8244, gypsycab.com. F Local mainstay 33+ years. Varied urban cuisine menu changes twice daily. Signature dish: Gypsy chicken. Seafood, tofu, duck, veal. $$ FB R Su; L D Daily MARDI GRAS Sports Bar, 123 San Marco Ave., 347-3288, mardibar.com. Wings, nachos, shrimp, chicken, Phillys, sliders, soft pretzels. $$ FB TO L D Daily MBQUE, 604 Anastasia Blvd., 484-7472. New Southern-style, fresh-casual. Handspun milkshakes, super kale salad. Housemade rubs, sauces. Platters, ribs, brisket, sweet/spicy pulled/ chopped pork, chicken, sausage. $$ BW K TO L D Daily MELLOW MUSHROOM, 410 Anastasia Blvd., 826-4040. F Bite Club. 2016 Best of Jax Winner. SEE BEACHES.

O’LOUGHLIN PUB, 6975 A1A S., 429-9715. Family-owned-andoperated. Authentic fish & chips, shepherd’s pie, corned beef & cabbage, bangers & mash, duck wings. $$ FB K TO L D Daily SALT LIFE FOOD SHACK, 321 A1A Beach Blvd., 217-3256. SEE BEACHES.

METRO DINER, 1000 S. Ponce de Leon Blvd., 758-3323. F 2016 Best of Jax Winner. Serving dinner nightly. SEE SAN MARCO. SHANGHAI NOBBY’S, 10 Anastasia Blvd., 547-2188. Cubanstyle, Philly cheesesteak sandwiches. $$ FB

SAN MARCO + SOUTHBANK

BEACH DINER, 1965 San Marco Blvd., 399-1306. SEE AMELIA. THE BEARDED PIG SOUTHERN BBQ & BEER GARDEN, 1224 Kings Ave., 619-2247, thebeardedpigbbq.com. 2016 Best of Jax Winner. Barbecue joint offers Southern style BBQ, like brisket, pork, chicken, sausage, beef; veggie platters. $$ BW K TO Daily

BISTRO AIX, 1440 San Marco Blvd., 398-1949, bistrox.com. F Mediterranean/French inspired menu changes seasonally. 250+ wine list. Wood-fired oven baked, grilled specialties: pizza, pasta, risotto, steaks, seafood. Hand-crafted cocktails, specialty drinks. Dine outside. HH M-F. $$$ FB L D Daily EUROPEAN STREET CAFÉ, 1704 San Marco Blvd., 398-9500. SEE RIVERSIDE.

FUSION SUSHI, 1550 University Blvd. W., 636-8688, fusion sushijax.com. F Upscale; fresh sushi, sashimi, hibachi, teriyaki, kiatsu, seafood. $$ K L D Daily INDOCHINE, 1974 San Marco Blvd., 503-7013. 2016 Best of

Jax Winner. SEE DOWNTOWN.

KITCHEN ON SAN MARCO, 1402 San Marco Blvd., 396-2344, kitchenonsanmarco.com. Gastropub serves local, national craft beers, specialty cocktails. Seasonal menu, with fresh, locally sourced ingredients. $$ FB R Su; L D Daily METRO DINER, 3302 Hendricks Ave., 398-3701, metrodiner. com. F 2016 Best of Jax Winner. Original upscale diner in a historic 1930s-era building. Meatloaf, chicken pot pie, soups. This one serves dinner nightly. $$ B R L D Daily PIZZA PALACE RESTAURANT & PIZZERIA, 1959 San Marco Blvd., 399-8815, pizzapalacejax.com. F Family-owned&-operated; spinach pizza, chicken spinach calzones, ravioli, lasagna, parmigiana. Dine outside. HH. $$ BW K TO L D Daily TAVERNA, 1986 San Marco Blvd., 398-3005, tavernasan marco.com. Chef Sam Efron’s authentic Italian; tapas, woodfired pizza. Seasonal local produce, meats. Craft beer (some local), cocktails, award-winning wine. $$$ FB K TO R L D Daily V PIZZA, 1406 Hendricks Ave., 527-1511, vpizza.com. True Neapolitana pizzas with the freshest ingredients – a rare class of artisan pizza from Naples. $$ FB to L D Daily

SOUTHSIDE + TINSELTOWN

ALHAMBRA THEATRE & DINING, 12000 Beach Blvd., 6411212, alhambrajax.com. Open 50 years. Executive Chef DeJuan Roy’s themed menus. Reservations. $$ FB D Tu-Su THE CHATTY CRAB, 9041 Southside Blvd., Ste. 138C, 888-0639, chattycrab.com. Chef Dana Pollard’s raw oysters, Nawlins low country boil, po’ boys, 50¢ wing specials. $$ FB K TO L D Daily DICK’S WINGS & GRILL, 10750 Atlantic Blvd., 619-0954. 2016 Best of Jax Winner. SEE ORANGE PARK.

EUROPEAN Street Café, 5500 Beach, 398-1717. SEE RIVERSIDE. GREEK STREET CAFÉ, 3546 St. Johns Bluff Rd. S., Ste. 106, 503-0620, greekstreetcafe.com. Fresh, authentic, modern; Greek owners. Gyros, spanakopita, dolmades, falafel, salads, nachos. Award-winning wines. $$ BW K TO L D M-Sa LARRY’S GIANT SUBS, 3611 St. Johns Bluff Rd. S., 641-6499. 4479 Deerwood Lake Pkwy., 425-4060. F SEE ORANGE PARK. MARIANAS GRINDS, 11380 Beach Blvd., Ste. 10, 206-612-6596. Pacific Islander fare, chamorro culture. Soups, stews, fitada, beef oxtail, katden pika; empanadas, lumpia, chicken relaguen, BBQ-style ribs, chicken. $$ TO B L D Tu-Su MELLOW MUSHROOM, 9734 Deer Lake Ct., 997-1955. F Bite Club. 2016 Best of Jax Winner. SEE BEACHES.

M SHACK, 10281 Midtown Pkwy., 642-5000. SEE BEACHES. OVINTE, 10208 Buckhead Branch Dr., 900-7730, ovinte.com. Italy, Spain, Mediterranean flavor. Small plates, tapas, charcuterie: ceviche fresco, pappardelle bolognese, lobster ravioli. 240-bottle/ wines, 75/glass; craft spirits. $$ FB R, Su; D Nightly TAVERNA YAMAS, 9753 Deer Lake Ct., 854-0426, taverna yamas.com. F Bite Club. Charbroiled kabobs, seafood, desserts. Greek wines, daily HH. Bellydancing. $$ FB K TO L D Daily TOSSGREEN, 4375 Southside, Ste. 12, 619-4356. 4668 Town Crossing Dr., Ste. 105, 686-0234. Custom salads, burritos, burrito bowls; fruit, veggies, 100% natural chicken, sirloin, shrimp, tofu, cheese, dressing, salsa, frozen yogurt. $$ K TO L D Daily

DINING DIRECTORY SPRINGFIELD + NORTHSIDE

ANDY’S GRILL, 1810 W. Beaver St., 354-2821, jaxfarmers market.com. Jax Farmers Market. Local, regional, international produce. Breakfast, sandwiches, snacks, drinks. $ B L D Mon.-Sat. BARZ LIQUORS & FISH CAMP, 9560 Heckscher Dr., 251-3330. Authentic fish camp, biker-friendly, Americanowned. Package store. $ FB L D Daily DICK’S WINGS & GRILL, 12400 Yellow Bluff Rd., 619-9828.

450077 S.R. 200, 879-0993. 2016 Best of Jax Winner. SEE ORANGE PARK.

HOLA MEXICAN RESTAURANT, 1001 N. Main St., 356-3100, holamexicanrestaurant.com. F Authentic fresh fajitas, burritos, specials, enchiladas, more. HH; sangria. BW K TO L D M-Sa LARRY’S GIANT SUBS, 12001 Lem Turner Rd., 764-9999.

SEE O. PARK.

MELLOW MUSHROOM PIZZA BAKERS, 15170 Max Leggett Pkwy., 757-8843. F 2016 Best of Jax Winner. SEE BEACHES.

CHEFFED-UP

EGG-CITING TIMES Get CRACKING with Chef Bill

A QUESTION OCCURRED TO ME THE other day: What is my favorite culinary ingredient? Duh, butter! But besides butter. It is hands-down the incredible, edible egg. No other product in our culinary arsenal offers the versatility of these little all-purpose gems. Eggs are the superstars of world cuisine. If the Heisman Trophy were awarded to food, the egg would crush the competition every year. Maybe the Jags should draft an egg next year? Just sayin’. Even the novice cook has to be impressed by all the ways eggs are incorporated into our diets. From breakfast to dessert, eggs play a crucial role in the great show known as “The Delicious Days of My Life.” Here’s the opening act: Two light brown eggs, one in each hand, are expertly cracked and slipped into a warm buttered omelet pan. They begin to sizzle ever so gently. After several minutes, which seem as an eternity to the famished cook, the whites begin to coagulate. What magic. Nature’s sorcery at work. They then begin to transform from opacity to a brilliant whiteness. Perfection! All that is left to do is to quickly, with the uttermost dexterity, transfer them to the waiting plate without breaking the yolk. This scene is not to be performed by shoemakers. The perfect sunny-side-up eggs are executed only by a well-practiced craftsperson. Act two revolves around lunch. This one is a bit more complicated: the pâte brisée (pie dough) is rolled to a mere 1/8 of an inch, then immediately snuggled into a pie pan. Meanwhile the custard — consisting of beaten eggs, Half-and-Half and a dainty pinch of nutmeg — is gently combined. A ham, herb and gruyère cheese garnish is laid upon the pâte brisée. Now, without further ado, the custard is poured into a prepared pie shell and sent to the preheated oven. Ever so soon a magnificent Quiche Lorraine will emerge from the oven in all its delicate, sumptuous glory. Let us move on the closing scene. The butter is now being creamed in the mixer to a gorgeous light and fluffy state. As this fascinating process occurs, the dry

ingredients, including seasonal spices, are sifted into a cloud-like texture and are ready to meet the aerated butter. But, wait, don’t forget the brown sugar and molasses! Now it’s time to add all the ingredients together, including our star, the eggs. Here’s the full recipe for gingerbread cakes, and remember to applaud the eggciting star of the show!

CHEFFED-UP

CHEF BILL’S GINGERBREAD CAKES

Ingredients: • 1/4 pound butter • 2-1/2 cups all-purpose flour • 1 cup boiling water • 2 tsp. baking soda • 2 tsp. ground ginger • 1-1/5 tsp. cinnamon • 1/2 tsp. cloves • 1/2 tsp. nutmeg • 1/2 tsp. salt • 2 tsp. baking powder • 2/3 cup dark brown sugar • 1 cup molasses • 1 tbsp. grated ginger • 2 eggs, beaten Directions: 1. Combine boiling water and baking soda in a small bowl. 2. In another bowl, combine flour, ground spices, salt and baking powder. 3. Cream butter in a mixer, beat in brown sugar until fluffy. Beat in molasses and grated ginger, then baking soda and water mixture, then flour, spices, salt and baking powder mixture, and lastly, the eggs. Mix to combine. 4. Pipe into pans and bake at 350°F for 30 minutes or until a skewer comes out dry. Until we cook again,

Chef Bill Thompson cheffedup@folioweekly.com ____________________________________ Contact Chef Bill Thompson, the owner of the Amelia Island Culinary Academy in Fernandina Beach, at cheffedup@folioweekly.com; send him your recipes or ask him culinary questions, to find inspiration and get you Cheffed Up! DECEMBER 7-13, 2016 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | 41

PETS LOOKIN’ FOR LOVE FOLIO

FOLIO LIVING

W E E K LY

PET

DEAR DAVI

LOVERS’

GUIDE

PET-FRIENDLY

SKIES

Davi’s guideline for FLYING WITH PETS My family and I are taking the red-eye from LA to NYC for some holiday cheer. Any tips on getting there with ease? Pippa the Pomeranian Pippa, Air travel can be safe and stress-free, if you plan carefully. Get familiar with these guidelines before flying the petfriendly skies. • BOOK EARLY: Call early to reserve your • seat. Nearly all airlines limit the • number of pets that can travel in cabin • on a flight. The earlier you book, the • better chance of securing your spot. • FLY DIRECT: Book a non-stop flight • whenever possible to avoid the hassle • of layovers, switching planes and • longer travel times. • VISIT YOUR VET: Get an exam to • guarantee you are fit to fly. Your vet • can also issue a health certificate, • which may be necessary depending on • your destination. • GET A CARRIER: Your carrier should be • airline-approved and have enough • room to stand, turn around, and lie • down. Soft-sided carriers are more • suitable for carry-on and fit better • under the seat. Curl up in your carrier • as often as possible before your trip so • you are confident on travel day. • CHECK ID: Make sure you are tagged and • chipped before you travel. Your collar • and carrier should be clearly marked • with your name and contact information. • AVOID SEDATIVES: Just say “no.” • According to the American Veterinary • Medical Association, tranquilizers can • increase the risk of respiratory and • cardiac distress and interfere with your • ability to balance and maintain equilibrium. • PACK A FAVORITE TOY: Something familiar • can bring comfort during the flight. AT THE AIRPORT: • Eat about two hours before your • flight. Traveling on a full stomach • can be uncomfortable.

PET TIP: THIS RUN’S FOR YOU DOGS ARE KNOWN FOR THEIR VORACIOUS, indiscriminating appetites. Unfortunately for Big Red, that appetite can lead to gastrointestinal discomfort. Happily, most symptoms disappear within a day or two and there are easy home remedies, such as feeding Prince Terrier a bland diet of white rice and boiled chicken. Diarrhea and upset stomach can be signs of more serious issues, so if the symptoms last more than a couple of days or are accompanied by lethargy, vomiting or inappetence (lack of appetite), PetMD recommends you hustle to the vet. 42 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | DECEMBER 7-13, 2016

• Allow time to hydrate and eliminate • before embarking. • Arrive early, but not too early. Most • airlines recommend two hours before • your flight. • Check in with the counter agent to be • weighed and measured for size. • Prepare for security. Your carrier — • NOT you - must pass through the • x-ray scanner. You will walk with your • human through the metal detector. • Find the airport pet relief zone • for a quick walk and potty break • before boarding. ON THE PLANE: • Keep calm and stay put. You must • remain under the seat. Don’t worry, • though. There are no rules stopping • your human from reaching in and • giving treats or a pat on the head. PET-FRIENDLY AIRLINES: • Southwest Airlines allows small pets on • board. Pet carriers must be stowed • under the seat. The fee is $95 each way. • American Airlines accepts small dogs • and cats in the cabin. The fee is $125 • each way. • Delta permits pet passengers on • most flights for a fee of $125 each way. • A pet carrier counts as one piece of • carry-on luggage. • Frontier Airlines welcomes small pets, • including rabbits, guinea pigs and birds • (!) in the cabin with a $75 fee each way. • JetBlue accepts small pets in the cabin • on both domestic and international • flights. The fee is $100 each way. The • combined weight of pet and carrier • must not exceed 20 pounds. For pet travel information, go to: dogjaunt.com/taking-your-dog-on-a-plane Safe Travels! Davi mail@folioweekly.com ____________________________________ Davi the dachshund is eagerly awaiting his chance to fly the friendly skies.

PET EVENTS MEGA PET ADOPTION • First Coast No More Homeless Pets offers more than 1,000 pets for adoption, 10 a.m.-6 p.m. Dec. 16, 17 and 18 at Jacksonville Fairgrounds, 510 Fairground Place, Downtown. The $20 fee includes spay/neuter, microchip, vaccines and city license, fcnmhp.org.

ADOPTABLES

DIPPY

ON THE PROWL • Hi, there! My name is Dippy and I’m looking for someone to treat me like the queen I am! Some of my requirements: Catnip supply must always be full and tuna casserole should be plentiful. If you feel you can meet these requirements, then please come see me at Jacksonville Humane Society! They are open seven days a week. For more information on Dippy and other adoptables, visit jaxhumanesociety.org. PETS FOR A LIFETIME • Epic Animals Outreach offers an informational session and a free packet of resources and samples on Keeping a Pet for a Lifetime, 10 a.m.-noon Dec. 10 at Bark Downtown, 45 W. Adams St., 274-1177, epicanimals.org. A dog training expert is on hand to give tips and tools on picking the right pet, helping you learn to live on a budget and still own a pet, and talk about dog training tricks and tips.

ADOPTABLES

OLIVER

PEOPLE PLEASER • Some dogs love dogs and some dogs love cats, but for me there’s nothing better than people! I’m on the hunt for someone who will love and care for me. I’m a very sweet boy who loves treats on all occasions. I have perfected the act of “puppy dog eyes” and I hope they will work on you when you come visit me at Jacksonville Humane Society, 8464 Beach Blvd., Southside! To donate to JHS, designate the number 38619 through the Combined Federal Campaign. PAMPERED PUP PARTY • A raffle, a silent auction, gifts and other treats are featured, 4-8 p.m. Dec. 13 at Tropical Smoothie, 1808 Hendricks Ave., San Marco, 399-1514. Leashed dogs allowed. Proceeds benefit Epic Animals Outreach’s Pets for a Lifetime program; epicanimals.org. KATZ 4 KEEPS ADOPTION DAYS • Adoption days are held 11 a.m.-3 p.m. Dec. 10, 11, 17 and 18, at 935B A1A N., Ponte Vedra Beach, 834-3223, katz4keeps.org. ___________________________________ To list a pet event, send the event name, time, date, location (complete street address and city), admission price, contact number/website to print, to mdryden@folioweekly.com – at least two weeks before the event. DECEMBER 7-13, 2016 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | 43

FREEWILL ASTROLOGY

DALE RATERMANN’s Crossword presented by

JOHANN WOLFGANG VON GOETHE, MERINO SHEEP, BRAINPOWER, STOAT/ERMINES

Serving Excellence Since 1928 Member American Gem Society

San Marco

Ponte Vedra

Avondale

2044 San Marco Blvd.

The Shoppes of Ponte Vedra

330 A1A North

3617 St. Johns Ave.

398-9741

280-1202

388-5406

ARIES (March 21-April 19): Usually I cheer when you devote single-minded attention to pressing concerns, even if you get a bit obsessive. But now, in accordance with astrological omens, I ask you to run wild and free as you sample lavish variety. It’s prime time to survey a spectrum of spicy, shiny and feisty possibilities … to entertain a host of ticklish riddles rather than to insist on prosaic answers. You’ve been authorized by the cosmos to fabricate a temporary religion of playing and messing around.

FOLIO WEEKLY CROSSWORD 1

17 19

18 21

44 49

48 52

62 68

69 71

1 Crib items 8 Sitting duck, maybe 13 Said over 15 Apt 16 Worn out 17 Like some Ospreys fans 18 Race pace 19 Lofty standards 21 Brawn 23 Fights 28 Didn’t honor a promise 32 Fully absorbed 33 38 Special’s “ Sound of Your Voice” 36 The Brummels 37 Early Andean 38 “Take one!” 40 Car pedal 43 Something fishy 44 Cubitus bone 45 Guitarist Lofgren 47 Jax map abbrs. 48 Errant kick 49 Its Atomic Number is 45 52 Wine-cellar units 54 Banana buy 58 JEA woe

GEMINI (May 21-June 20): In Goethe’s play Faust, the hero bemoans his lack of inner unity. Two different souls live within him, he says, and they don’t cooperate. Even worse, they try to rule him without consulting the other. You’ve experienced a more manageable version of that split in your life. Lately, though, it may have grown more intense and divisive. If so, it’s a good sign. It portends the possibility that healing is in the works … energy is building for a novel synthesis. To make it happen, identify and celebrate what your two sides have in common.

ACROSS

58 65

43 46

37 40

23 29

TAURUS (April 20-May 20): Taurus poet Adrienne Rich described “an honorable human relationship” as “one in which two people have the right to use the word ‘love.’” How is that right earned? How is such a bond nurtured? Rich said it was “often terrifying to both persons involved,” because it’s “a process of refining the truths they can tell each other.” You’re in a favorable phase to become an even more honorable lover, friend and ally. To take advantage of the opportunity, explore this question: How can you supercharge and purify the ability to speak and hear the truth?

22 28

62 63 67 69

O’Hara home Rich’s partner Unlucky Florida National Guard command 70 Tower over 71 With 72-Across, local passer 72 See 71-Across

DOWN 1 Fissures 2 Game name 3 Grand National Park 4 More ho-hum 5 Drop back 6 Needle case 7 ATP ranking 8 Limp Bizkit’s Fred 9 Free 10 Had a bite 11 First Coast News reporter Amaro 12 Orange Park summer hrs. 14 Prez inits. 15 Olio meal starter 20 The Simpsons grandpa 22 Place to surf 24 ZZ Top, e.g.

44 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | DECEMBER 7-13, 2016

25 Alights at JIA 26 Disney creation 27 Florida Theatre marquee names 29 Ex-Jag Zach Miller’s home st. 30 Sound detector 31 Bat poop 33 Rule of 34 Indy 500 winner Castroneves 35 Young’s associate 39 Part of NE Florida 41 Rock of rock 42 Ron DeSantis, as a collegian 46 Larry’s Giant one

49 50 51 53 55 56 57 59 60 61 63 64

Recycling goal Prez inits. Sci-fi hybrid Dirty dog Birth related Greek island Styx setting SOS response Goo amount Sailors’ saint Beatles descriptor Falcons up on a scoreboard 65 culpa 66 Cary State Forest tree 68 Yule choice

Solution to 11.30.16 Puzzle M A G M A

A C R I D

S T E A D

H T T P

O A H U

T O O L

S N I P

H O N E

O R C A

S I A T M I T C H B E S O L M L I A T M A S

P A L M A R I A S C O T T N T R I R I C K E A S D T B S L I O A N B R S P O L A O H A L F A T S E G E O D

S S T

M I L A I I C E N C U S T F I T U O W N U I N O N E L A D E S

A V I S

M A L L

A N T E

R A I N

R A R E

Y A M S

B I S O N

E C O N O

T E N E T

CANCER (June 21-July 22): Poet Dick Allen described Zen Buddhism as being “so filled with paradoxes that it jumps through hoops that aren’t even there.” I’m applying that to the way you’ve been living recently. I can see how it may have amused you to engage in such glamorous intrigue, but I hope you’ll stop. There’s no longer anything to be gained by complicated hocuspocus. But it’s fine to jump through actual hoops if it yields concrete benefits. LEO (July 23-Aug. 22): For decades, many self-help authors have claimed humans use 10 percent or less of the brain’s potential. But the truth is, our gray matter is far more active than that. The scientific evidence is abundant. (See a summary: tinyurl.com/mindmyths.) I hope this spurs you to destroy any limited assumptions you might have about your brainpower. According to my astrological analysis, you could and should become significantly smarter and wiser in the next nine months. VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22): Born under the sign of Virgo, Mary Oliver is America’s best-selling poet. She wasn’t an overnight sensation, but she did win a Pulitzer Prize when she was 49. “What I loved in the beginning, I think, was mostly myself,” she confesses in one poem. “Never mind that I had to, since somebody had to. That was many years ago.” I bet that even at age 81, Oliver is still refining and deepening self-love. Neither she nor you will ever be finished with this grand, grueling project. Luckily, now’s a good time for you to make plucky progress in the ongoing work. And this is an essential practice if you want to keep refining and deepening your love for others. LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 22): Most highquality suits worn by men are made from the wool of merino sheep raised in Australia. So says Nicholas Antongiavanni in his book The Suit: A Machiavellian Approach to Men’s Style. There are now more than 100 million members of this breed, and they’re all descendants of just two

rams and four ewes from 18th-century Spain. How did that happen? It’s a long story. (Read: tinyurl. com/merinosheep.) For the oracular purposes of this horoscope, I’ll say that in the next nine months you’ll also have the potential to germinate a few choice seeds that could yield enormous, enduring results. Choose well!

SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21):Five of my Scorpio acquaintances and 17 of my Scorpio readers have let me know that they’re seeking to make new alliances and strengthen existing alliances. Does this mean that Scorpios everywhere are engaged in similar quests? Hope so. I’d love to see you expand the network of like-minded souls. I’d love for you to be ardent about recruiting more help and support. Happily, current astrological omens favor such efforts. For best results, be receptive, inviting and forthright. SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21): “The awesome splendor of the universe is much easier to deal with if you think of it as a series of small chunks,” wrote novelist Terry Pratchett. That’s true; I’ll add a caveat: Now and then, the trickle of small chunks of awesome splendor gives way to a surge of really big chunks. According to my astrological analysis, that’s either already happening for you, or it’s about to. Can you handle it? You’ve noticed some are unskilled at welcoming such glory; they prefer to keep their lives tidy and tiny. They may even get stressed by good fortune. You’re not one of these fainthearted souls. Summon the grace you’ll need to make spirited use of the onslaught of magnificence. CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19): In his book The Dictionary of Obscure Sorrows, John Koenig coins words to describepreviously unnamed feelings. You may have experienced some of them recently. One is “monachopsis,” defined as “the subtle but persistent feeling of being out of place.” There’s “altschmerz,” meaning “weariness with the same issues you’ve always had.” Another obscure sorrow you may recognize is “nodus tollens,” or “the realization that the plot of your life doesn’t make sense anymore.” Two of Koenig’s more uplifting terms — which you feel as you claw free of the morass: “liberosis,” caring less about unimportant things; relaxing your grip to hold life loosely. And “flashover,” that moment when conversations become “real and alive, which occurs when a spark of trust shorts out the delicate circuits you keep insulated under layers of irony.” AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18): In 1983, two Australian blokes launched a quest to tip a drink at every pub in Melbourne. Thirty-two years later, Mick Stevens and Stuart MacArthur finally accomplished their goal when they sipped beers at The Clyde. It was the 476th establishment on their list. The coming weeks will be a highly favorable time to plan your epic adventure. Make it more sacred and meaningful than Stevens’ and MacArthur’s trivial mission. PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20): For three seasons of the year — spring, summer and fall — a certain weasel species has brown fur. During that time, it’s known as a stoat. When winter arrives, the creature’s coat turns to white and its name changes. We call it an ermine. The next spring, it once again becomes a stoat. Given the nature of the astrological omens, it would make poetic sense for you to borrow this strategy. What nickname do you want for the next three months? Here are a few suggestions: Sweet Sorcerer; Secret Freedom-Seeker; Lost-and-Found Specialist; Mystery Maker; Resurrector. Rob Brezsny freewillastrology@freewillastrology.com

NEWS OF THE WEIRD ARM IN HAMMER BLOW

Almost all law enforcement agencies in America use the Scott Reagent field test when they discover powder that looks like cocaine, but the several agencies that have actually conducted tests for “false positives” say they happen up to half the time. In October, the latest victims (husband-and-wife truck drivers with spotless records and Pentagon clearances) were finally released after 75 days in jail awaiting trial — for baking soda that tested “positive” three times by Arkansas troopers (but, eventually, “negative” by a state crime lab). Why do cops love the test? It costs $2. The couple had to struggle to get their truck back and are still fighting to be re-cleared to drive military explosives.

IF YOU SEE SOMETHING, SAY SOMETHING

Ricky Berry and his roommate walked into a CVS store in Richmond, Virginia, in November to ask if it carried sliced cheese but were told no. Minutes later, all the employees walked to the back of the store, hid in a locked room, and called the police. Berry and pal, and a third customer (with a toothache and desperately needing Orajel), were bewildered by the empty store until a Richmond police officer arrived. After observing that the three customers appeared nonthreatening, he mused along with Berry that “this is how weird, apocalyptic movies start.” WRIC-TV reported later that the employee who panicked and called police will “possibly” need retraining.

TALK TO THE HAND

In October, a court in Australia’s Victoria state began considering an appeal on whether three deaf people might be too intellectually challenged to have planned a murder. The prosecutor offered surveillance video of the three in a lobby planning the murder’s details via sign language as they waited for an elevator to take them up to the eventual crime scene.

PORCINE EMOTIONS

Pigs are such complex animals that scientists are studying how to tell the “optimists” from the “pessimists.” British researchers, writing in a recent Biology Letters, described how “proactive” porkers differed from “reactive” ones, and, as with humans, how their particular

Folio Weekly Magazine can help you connect with that surfer hunk you almost talked to at the Young Vegan Professionals meet-up, or that gum-crackin’ goddess at Target who “accidentally” dropped a jasmine-scented kazoo in your cart. Just go to folioweekly.com/i-saw-u.html, fill out the FREE form correctly (40 words or fewer, dammit) by 5 p.m. Friday (for the next Wednesday’s FWM) – next stop: Bliss!

mood at that time distinguished them as “glass half-full” rather than “glass half-empty.”

LET’S RE-THINK THIS

The Schlitterbahn Waterpark in Kansas City, Kansas, got the message in November and shut down its “world’s tallest waterslide” (17 stories; reaching speeds of 60 mph) after the neckinjury death of a 10-year-old rider in August. But comparably altitude-obsessed architects in Tokyo said in November that they were moving ahead with proposals for “Next Tokyo 2045” to include a one-mile-high residential complex (twice as tall as the currently highest skyscraper). A spokesperson for principal architects Kohn Pedersen Fox said he realizes that coastal Tokyo, currently in earthquake, typhoon and tsunami zones, would present a climate-change challenge (and especially since the building would be on land once reclaimed from Tokyo Bay).

ISN’T IT IRONIC?

San Diego police officer Christine Garcia, who identifies as transgender, was turned away in November as she attempted to enter the Transgender Day of Remembrance at the city’s LGBT Community Center, because organizers thought the sight of a police uniform might upset some people. Garcia was one of the event’s organizers.

WHAT A CATCH

Gary Zerola was arraigned in Boston in November on two counts of rape. He is a defense lawyer, former prosecutor, one-time “Most Eligible Bachelor” winner, and was a finalist in the first season of ABC-TV’s “The Bachelor.” He was also accused of two counts of rape in 2006 (but acquitted at trial) and another in 2007 (but the charge was dropped).

MR. TOAD’S WILD RIDE

On Nov. 16, Richard Rusin, 34, was charged with DUI in St. Charles, Illinois, after he drove off a street, going airborne, hitting close to the top of one house, rebounding off another, uprooting a tree (sending it onto a roof), and knocking out electricity to the neighborhood when the car clipped a utility pole guide wire. His car landed upside-down in a driveway. He was hospitalized. Chuck Shepherd weirdnews@earthlink.net

No left or right swipe here – you can actually use REAL WORDS to find REAL LOVE!

One: Write a ive-word headline so they’ll recognize you, or them, or the place. Two: Describe the person, like, “You: Blonde, hot, skanky, tall.” Three: Describe yourself, like, “Me: Redhead, boring, clean, virgin.” Four: Describe the encounter, like, “ISU with your posse at Dos Gatos.” Five: Hook up, fall in love, reserve a church. No names, emails, websites, etc. And fer chrissake, it’s forty (40) words or fewer. The are here … lingering under mistletoe again, all on your lonesome? Pathetic. Reach out through the seasonal magic of Folio Weekly ISUs!

Holidays

CROSSWORD QT You had orange socks and an orange Element. You got a cappuccino (or two) and started with a crossword. Your laptop had an Equality sticker on it … either you really like math, or we should meet. Maybe both. When: Nov. 29. Where: Bold Bean, Riverside. #1634-1207 CARMELO’S SILVER FOX You: Tall, handsome, older gentleman with an exceptional British accent! Me: Tall brunette who visits frequently. You’re flirty, but let’s make it official! Tea time? When: Nov. 11. Where: Carmelo’s Pizzeria, St. Augustine. #1633-1207 MY HOT, SEXY NEIGHBOR You: Tall, white sports jersey (No. 12, I think), flag tattoo. Me: Brunette, sunglasses, busty. While checking mail ISU on balcony playing darts, smoking cigar. Welcome to the neighborhood. Throw your dart at me anytime. When: Oct. 25. Where: Coquina Bay Apartments. #1632-1026 A YEAR AGO, OCEANWAY PUBLIX Wednesday afternoon before Thanksgiving. Talked in checkout line. Me: Kinda muscular, blue Never Quit shirt. Please forgive my walking away. You: So smokin’ hot I couldn’t believe it; black vehicle. Let me be your somebody! When: Nov. 25, ’15. Where: Oceanway Publix. #1631-1026 CUTE BARTRAM PARK RUNNER We’ve seen each other. You: Dark hair, blueeyed hottie, running. Me: Dark blonde, ponytail, walking. Today you said, “Sorry about that.” I smiled, not sure of meaning – sorry about crude car guys. Points – you’re a gentleman. Single? When: Oct. 17. Where: Bartram Park. #1630-1026 SALMON POLO, RIVERSIDE PUBLIX Going to check-out – bam! ISU. Handsome man. Facial hair. Fit. Smiled, made eye contact. Thought, “I’ll never see him again.” I pull from lot; you walk in front; noticed your right arm tattoo. No bags? When: Oct. 3. Where: Riverside Publix. #1629-1012 BRUNETTE BEAUTY WALKING TO BEACH Tall brunette walking her most white with mixed colored medium-sized dog. Snake-design comfortable pants, gorgeous body. Me: Waking up, starting day. You were first thing I saw from inside my house. Let’s walk together! When: Sept. 30. Where: Davis St., Neptune Beach. #1628-1005 MY BUD LIGHT/MARLBORO MAN You: Handsome man working the grill, drinking Bud Light and cooking some good-looking meat on Saturday. Me: Drinking Captain and Coke and fighting the desire to take advantage of you. Hoping you “grill” again soon! When: Aug. 27. Where: Downtown. #1627-0928 NEED HELP MOVING? First time ISU, you were moving from your apartment; we caught eyes. Met again, exchanged names. Wanted your number but it’s been so long since someone made me speechless. Come by sometime? You: Pretty. Me: Intrigued. When: Sept. 14. Where: Off JTB. #1626-0921

FIRST WATCH EARTHQUAKE You: Stunningly beautiful lady, long brown hair, shorts, athletic top, waiting for second party Sunday morning. Me: Tall, dark, handsome guy, kinda cop-looking. Tried to buy your breakfast; you hadn’t ordered. Really wanted to say hello. When: Aug. 28. Where: First Watch Beach Boulevard. #1625-0907 TRADE PORSCHE FOR BEACH CRUISER? Drawn to your physique, adored biceps as you chilled with friend! You complimented my Porsche. Offered trade for your cruiser. Didn’t ask for number. WOD together on next bring-a-friend day?! When: 4 p.m. June 5. Where: Zeta Brewing bicycle stand. #1616-0622 DANCING TO THE BONES You are L. from Ponte Vedra. I’m R, leading band at Conch House on Friday, Aug. 12. We said quick hello as you left. Really want to connect with you. Hopefully cosmos will agree. When: Aug. 12. Where: Conch House, St. Augustine. #1624-0817 FLOWERS IN MY HAND Very surprised to see you. Positive memories flooded back, so let’s have lunch and catch up. S. When: July 6. Where: Publix Pharmacy. #1623-0810 DO YOU SEEK UNIQUE? You: Beautiful brunette, Walmart sugar aisle, beautiful arm ink work; said you got it in Riverside. Me: Dark chocolate gentleman, captivated by smile, breathless looking into beautiful eyes. Too shy to get number. Meet for lunch? When: July 16. Where: Walmart Avenues. #1622-0720 HANDSOME, KIND GENTLEMAN ISU Saturday 1 a.m. You: Extremely handsome, cool hat, T-shirt, jeans; forgot wallet; complimented my white dress. Me: Long blond hair, green eyes, too shy to ask name or if unattached. Love to meet formally! When: July 17. Where: Walmart San Jose. #1621-0720 WE ARE READY FOR U You: Handsome man following, watching me, saying hi, calling, hanging up before u speak. Me: Want to hear your heart. My dog and condo await. Don’t be afraid. Everything will be OK. We love you. When: 2012. Where: Neighborhood. #1620-0720 AVONDALE ANGEL Me: Down on my luck, no place to go. You: Beautiful person who kept me from sleeping on the street. Thank you for your generosity for someone you didn’t even know! You’ll never ever be forgotten! When: June 16. Where: Avondale shops. #1619-0706 COOPER’S HAWK NICE SMILE WAITER You weren’t our waiter last Thursday 6/16; served us before. Name starts with G. Cute, dark blond hair, warm personality. Me: Brunette, curly hair, navy blue dress. You noticed us in booth. A drink, conversation? Contact. When: June 16. Where: Cooper’s Hawk Winery Town Center. #1618-0622 DECEMBER 7-13, 2016 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | 45

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46 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | DECEMBER 7-13, 2016

FOLIO VOICES : BACKPAGE EDITORIAL 75 years after the attack on PEARL HARBOR, WWII veteran reflects on the man who predicted it

ETERNAL VIGILANCE OR ETERNAL SLEEP THE CURRENT WARM RELATIONSHIP BETWEEN the United States and Japan on economic and military matters was not the case on December 7, 1941. On that date 75 years ago, Japanese planes, with no warning, bombed and torpedoed our naval fleet at Pearl Harbor and then attacked our military bases around Hawaii. That attack had been predicted 32 years earlier, but like Cassandra’s prophesy at Troy, the warnings about Japan went unheeded. The disaster at Pearl Harbor was the price we paid. The warning advisory appeared in The Valor of Ignorance, a 1909 book by a young American named Homer Lea. Lea was physically disabled with a curved back and partial blindness, but his vision related to military matters was unparalleled. In a later book, The Day of the Saxon, Lea wrote of Japan and Germany teaming to conquer much of the world and predicted the decline of the British Empire. But it was his forecast about Japanese aggression in the Pacific that showcased his genius. Lea attended Stanford University, where he developed a deep interest in the Far East, especially China and Japan, which led him to travel extensively in Asia. He served as an advisor to the Chinese military during the Boxer Rebellion, and for his efforts was made a general in the Chinese army. He was a friend and military advisor to Sun Yat-sen, the founder of modern China. While Lea was in Japan, Japanese naval officers offered him an officer’s commission and showed him a map of the Pacific indicating all lands they hoped to put under Japanese control. Lea declined, but the Japanese plans became the basis for his predictions, including: “Silently, without haste, slowly, with an intentness that is conscious of neither hesitation nor diversion, this militant empire [Japan] moves across the sea. The nation has vanished. It has been metamorphosed into a soldier. Japan draws near to her next war — a war with America — by which she expects to lay the true foundation of her greatness. “In a war with America, there are other conditions of preparedness that will augment the rapidity of Japan’s conquest, that is the movement of her troops and naval forces to positions adjacent to the theater of war prior to a formal declaration of hostilities.” Lea then discussed how the Japanese would take the Philippines. “The conquest of these islands would be less of an undertaking than was the seizure of Cuba by the United States; for while Santiago de Cuba did not fall until nearly three months after the declaration of war, Manila will be forced to surrender in less than three weeks.” (Lea’s reckoning was off by two days. Japanese forces made their first landing on Luzon on Dec. 10, 1941, and they entered Manila on Jan. 2, 1942, 23 days later.)

“THE CONQUEST OF THE PHILIPPINES IS NO complex military problem. Japan, by landing simultaneously one column at Dagupan [Lingayen Gulf] and another column the same size at Polio Bight [Lamon Bay] would strategically render the American position untenable. These points are equidistant from Manila.” A U.S. War Department study of the Japanese invasion of the Philippines released in November 1942 stated, “The subsequent landing of the two main invasion forces at Lingayen and at Lamon Bay … [was] one of the most brilliant moves of the entire war in the Far East.” Lea continued, “The U.S. and Japan are approaching, careless on the one hand and predetermined on the other, that point of contact that is war. Nothing can better serve the interests of Japan, or any nation under similar conditions, than the characteristic indifference of the Republic to the dangers threatening it.” Lea’s uncannily accurate prognostications were ignored or ridiculed by all but a handful officials within both the War Department and the State Department, but his books were read and praised by such figures as Germany’s Kaiser Wilhelm, Russia’s Vladimir Lenin, and Britain’s Lord Roberts. Valor of Ignorance became required reading for all Japanese officers; it was a textbook at the Japanese War College. The book went through 24 printings in Japan, with some editions titled, The War Between Japan and America. ONE OF VERY FEW AMERICAN MILITARY personnel supporting Lea’s analysis was the Army’s former Chief of Staff Lieutenant General Adna Chaffee, who wrote the introduction to Valor of Ignorance: “We do not know of any work in military literature published in the United States more deserving the attention of men who study the history of the United States and then the science of war than this book.” One of Lea’s important sources of information was Japan’s record of aggression against its neighbors. It disproves the belief by some that we provoked the Japanese attack by boycotting essential goods needed for its growing industrial complex. As early as 1871, Japanese strategists felt that to make Japan supreme in the Pacific, they had to occupy both territory on the Asian mainland and on the numerous islands extending thousands of miles across the ocean. To implement this strategy, that year Japan assumed occupation of a Pacific island. Then in 1875, it occupied Russia’s Kuril Islands, and a year later seized the Bonin Islands. The country’s first real military test came in 1894 when it attacked China without declaring war. That victory resulted in Japan annexing Formosa (now Taiwan)

and the Ryukyu Islands. This was followed by occupation of the Pescadores Islands. Finally it was time to go after big game. Japan set her sights on Russia’s Liaodong Peninsula, which included Port Arthur. On the night of Feb. 8, 1904, Japanese torpedo boats made a surprise attack on the Russian fleet based at Port Arthur, completely crippling it. Two days later, Japan declared war on Russia. Under Admiral Togo Heihachiro, the Japanese annihilated the balance of Russia’s fleet. Japan next seized the southern half of Sakhalin Island and made Korea a protectorate, annexing it in 1910. As Lea predicted, Japanese conquests continued after his death in 1912. Germany controlled hundreds of islands in the Pacific, known collectively as Micronesia. The three major chains were the Marshalls, the Marianas and the Caroline Islands. Some of these islands evoke bitter memories among U.S. soldiers who served in the Pacific in World War II. In World War I, Japan declared war on Germany and occupied all the German islands, including Kwajalein Atoll, Palau, Yap, Saipan and Truk Lagoon. In 1922, Japan became a signatory to the Washington Naval Treaty, which limited both the size and the number of capital naval ships, then proceeded to ignore the agreement, building battleships and carriers and fortifying many occupied islands. Japan next used China as a military practice ground for both its warriors and weapons it had developed. In 1931, Japan grabbed Manchuria. In 1933, Jehol. Then, in 1937, the aggressive nation made a full-scale attack on the heart of China. That struggle was ongoing when they attacked Pearl Harbor, the Philippines, the Malay Peninsula, Singapore and the Dutch East Indies. Japan believed that Russia would not be a problem because the nation was reeling from attacks by the German military juggernaut on its Western front. Homer Lea received no recognition until the Japanese attack at Pearl Harbor. His forecasts of future events were factual, specific and amazingly accurate. The early success of the Japanese proved that The Valor of Ignorance was more than just a title. Through our ignorance of the aggressive plans of the Japanese, and Germany in Europe, many millions of lives were lost. Lea saw the smoldering long before the flashpoint. Today, his message, “eternal vigilance or eternal sleep,” holds true. Marvin Edwards mail@folioweekly.com _____________________________________ Edwards is a Folio Weekly contributor and WWII veteran who served as navigator on the de Havilland Mosquito spy plane.

DECEMBER 7-13, 2016 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | 47