04/29/17 The Shero by Folio Weekly

2 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | APRIL 26-MAY 2, 2017

THIS WEEK // 4.26-5.2.17 // VOL. 30 ISSUE 4 COVER STORY

THE SHERO

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Retiring Hubbard House CEO Ellen Siler looks back on four decades of helping battered women FIND SAFETY and REDISCOVER SELF STORY BY SUSAN COOPER EASTMAN

FEATURED F EATURED ARTICLES

I’M WITH AUDREY BY A.G. GANCARSKI How the DUVAL DELEGATION dropped the ball

[5] HOW DOES YOUR GARDEN GROWL?

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FOLIOVATION

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BY MARLENE DRYDEN RON CHAMBLIN

BY DANNY KELLY REMIXED DELUXE EDITION is a ‘correction’ of the grunge group’s debut effort

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45 West Bay Street, Suite 103 Jacksonville, Florida 32202 PHONE 904.260.9770 FAX 904.260.9773 APRIL 26-MAY 2, 2017 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | 3

THE MAIL

FROM THE EDITOR

THE JURY’S

OUT

Can Corrine’s defense deliver a ‘Not Guilty’? YOU BETCHA.

IN CASE YOU’VE BEEN LOST IN THE WOODS playing Pokémon Go with a pack of clowns, the local trial of the decade is going down at the federal courthouse in Downtown Duval. For her involvement with the One Door for Education scholarship fund that prosecutors assert was a sham used to enrich her, former Congresswoman Corrine Brown is charged with 22 federal counts of fraud and corruption. Brown’s longtime aide Ronnie Simmons has already rolled on her, as has One Door’s president Carla Wiley. Based on this, the revolving door of attorneys that briefly represented Brown before the relatively unknown James Smith from Orlando came on board last September, and the copious evidence prosecutors plan to present at trial, word is that it ain’t looking good for our hometown gal. Many believe that Brown is fixin’ to get a one-way ticket to the pokey; indeed, that may be her fate. But it’s also naïve to think the prosecution’s case is a slam-dunk. See, jury trial is equal parts theater and evidence. If Brown via Smith spins a more compelling tale than the prosecution, the little lady from Jacksonville may walk out of that courthouse a free woman. Sure, it’s true that the feds allege that of the $800,000 One Door collected for scholarships, just $1,200 was given to students, that the rest of the funds paid for private suites at EverBank Field, a high-falutin’ golf tournament, and the like. And it’s true that in her time as the highestranking local Democrat, Brown made plenty of enemies, including some within her own party. You know what else is true? Corrine Brown is a charming, petite, 70-year-old black woman who spent nearly a quarter-century in Congress. Her colloquialisms alone make her a sympathetic defendant. And those hats. #Adorbs. It also doesn’t hurt that, since she’s no longer in office, even if Brown wanted to defraud donors, she’d have a helluva harder time doing it. Scoff if you want, but other defendants have walked for less, even in lock-’em-up Florida. George Zimmerman and Casey Anthony ring any bells? They were accused of murder; at worst, Corrine Brown is accused of being a thief who stole from the rich to enrich her britches. There are lots of people who won’t be particularly bothered by that. And it cannot go without mention that we are in extremely

4 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | APRIL 26-MAY 2, 2017

tense times in terms of race relations, particularly locally. Case in point: Three weeks ago, mere blocks from where witnesses in Brown’s trial will swear to tell the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth, so help them God, a horrified nation watched cops beat a young, deaf, black man unconscious. It doesn’t take an attorney of F. Lee Bailey’s caliber to draw a parallel between Corrine Brown’s prosecution and a defenseless protester getting fisted by the long arm of the law. Nor to remind everyone that just last week, another powerful black female politician from Duval County was on the receiving end of a tirade that included words like “this bitch,” “girl” and, though it didn’t refer to her, the penultimate racial slur that starts with an ‘n’. If I were representing Brown, that’s how I’d play it. Cast her as the victim of overzealous prosecutors, shady opportunists and, especially, all the ‘isms’: racism, sexism, even ageism. This will not be easy. The evidence is stacked against her and her longtime confidant is ready to tell tales. Still, it is not impossible. Reasonable doubt, after all, is the highest legal burden to summit. For their part, prosecutors can overcome the onus of vilifying a former pillar of the community who’s already been brought low by the proceedings against her by casting Brown as the real evildoer, as someone willing to snatch scholarships from poor kids so she could hobnob with big ballers in stadium suites, as someone who stole opportunities for advancement from her own people. The evidence may be damning, but evidence alone will not put a figure of Corrine Brown’s stature in prison. If and only if they are successful at making the sugar-sweet, everybody’s grandma figure that Brown has done a particularly convincing job of presenting of late into a scheming, conniving turncoat will prosecutors bag the big fish they so desperately covet and send the former congresswoman to prison. The truth of the matter is that regardless of what happens at her trial, Corrine Brown has already lost. Her beloved political career is over. She knows it, the prosecutors know it, the jury will probably also know it even before opening statements. So then what is to be gained by stripping away Brown’s remaining dignity, putting her in an orange jumpsuit and shackles and delivering her to prison to become just another black person incarcerated by the state? Nothing but bragging rights or, er, um, justice—inasmuch as such exists in America. Claire Goforth claire@folioweekly.com @ClaireNJax

TRUMP SUPPORTER DEFENDS PUTIN (REALLY)

LIBERALS ARE IN A DITHER BECAUSE OF possible collusion, which some might call friendly cooperation, between Pres. Donald Trump’s people and Russia. Funny, when Russia was governed under communism as a Soviet Socialist Republic, the liberals gave dire warnings against us doing anything to upset great Soviet humanitarian leaders such as Joseph Stalin, Nikita Khrushchev and Leonid Brezhnev. We had to do everything to curry favor with every despot they trotted out and ignore their mass murders. Vladimir Putin is no angel, but nothing he’s done in office can hold a candle to the horrors committed under those butchers. Roderick T. Beaman via email

INTERNS TAKING OVER FOLIO

RE.: “Our Picks,” April 19 IN RESPONSE TO YOUR MENTION IN “OUR Picks” of Adam Sandler, David Spade, etc. as “comedy greats,” I’m curious who writes this—a 16-year-old intern? Doug Clifford via email

THE BUREAUCRACY OF LIFE AND DEATH

RE.: “Should the State Kill?” by A.G. Gancarski, April 12 IT’S ALWAYS AMAZED ME THAT SO MANY people who don’t think the government can do anything right are downright enthusiastic about it identifying exactly the right people to execute. Stan Ivester via Facebook

PRIMED FOR CORRUPTION

RE.: “Paid to Play,” by Claire Goforth, April 19 I ENJOYED YOUR RECENT WRITE-UP ABOUT corporate welfare. One point you missed … Why did Jacksonville and Florida feel the need to pay Amazon? Amazon HAD to locate here for logistics alone—period. Geographically speaking, there’s no better place in Florida/South Georgia than here. Fernandina doesn’t have the workforce or transport hubs. Daytona doesn’t have the space. Gainesville doesn’t have the interest. We are Amazon’s only choice. So why were “incentives” (welfare) required? This smells of corruption. Have any city council members purchased oceanfront property lately? Owen Musselwhite via email

THE BITTER TASTE OF IRONY

LACKING ANY APPARENT MORAL COMPASS, principles or direction beyond narcissism and winning at any cost, it comes as no surprise that Donald Trump, who was caught describing his own sexual harassment exploits, would within the first week of his proclaimed Sexual Assault Awareness Month, endeavor to excuse Bill O’Reilly’s sexual harassment charges by five women, which have already cost Fox News $13 million to quiet. Coming on the heels of the infamous resignation of Fox News Chairman Roger Ailes in July following allegations from dozens of women, one can only shake their head and wonder: Does cognizance of this hypocrisy even register on his morals scale? Ted Mikalsen via email

LEND YOUR VOICE If you’d like to respond to something you read in the pages of Folio Weekly Magazine, please send an email (with your name, address, and phone number for verification purposes only) to mail@folioweekly.com, visit us at folioweekly.com, or follow us on Twitter or Facebook (@folioweekly) and join the conversation.

BRICKBATS + BOUQUETS BOUQUET TO BARBARA A.B. GUBBIN Jacksonville Public Library Director Gubbin was recently selected by the American Library Association to receive the 2017 Ernest A. DiMattia Jr. Award for Innovation & Service to Community & Profession. The release announcing her recognition noted that following a $4M budget cut in 2012, under her leadership the library didn’t just survive, it thrived, in what the JPL deputy director referred to as “a miracle of tightrope walking.” Gubbin will receive the award, $5,000 and a plaque at the annual ALA Conference in June in Chicago. Hers will be a tough balancing act to follow. BRICKBATS TO DUVAL’S GOP DELEGATION After state Sen. Audrey Gibson (D-Jacksonville) was appallingly disrespected by now-resigned Sen. Frank Artiles (R-Miami), rather than condemn his statements, the Republican members of the Duval Delegation pulled a vanishing act worthy of D.B. Cooper. (See “I’m with Audrey,” p. 5) Here’s the thing, Sen. Aaron Bean and Reps. Jay Fant, Clay Yarborough, Jason Fischer and Cord Byrd: It is not a partisan act to condemn someone for referring to a female African-American senator as “this bitch” and “girl” and refer to other senators as “niggas,” it’s a class act, which you demonstrably are not. BOUQUET TO STOP THE FLORIDA BEAR HUNT Fearing a repeat of 2015’s controversial black bear hunt, during which 300 bears were killed in just two days, Stop The Florida Bear Hunt (stopflbearhunt.com) has campaigned tirelessly to convince wildlife officials to keep the season closed. The advocacy nonprofit, whose founder and campaign director Adam Sugalski is a Jacksonville resident, was successful in 2016 and again last week, when the Florida Fish & Wildlife Conservation Commission voted to keep black bear hunting season closed for two more years. The group has now set its sights on halting the hunt of mother bears and their cubs in Alaska. DO YOU KNOW SOMEONE WHO DESERVES A BOUQUET? HOW ABOUT A BRICKBAT? Send submissions to mail@folioweekly.com; 50 word maximum, concerning a person, place, or topic of local interest.

FOLIO VOICES : FIGHTIN’ WORDS

I’M WITH

AUDREY How the Duval Delegation DROPPED THE BALL MERCIFULLY, THE FLORIDA LEGISLATURE IS approaching Sine Die. Assuming there is no special session because budget or something else couldn’t be completed, that will be it for this year. For many reading this, not to mention national audiences that caught on to the story, the big narrative this year won’t be Lake Okeechobee or “Whiskey and Wheaties” or ride share legislation. Rather, the big story will be something that didn’t happen inside session at all—but instead in the restricted-access Governor’s Club, where Sen. Frank Artiles went on a rant worthy of Sen. Tony Montana against two African-American senators: one of whom, Audrey Gibson from Jacksonville, got up, walked out, and then became famous beyond this region. The details of the rant? The Miami Herald had the most NC-17 version. “Miami Republican Sen. Frank Artiles dropped the N-word to a pair of AfricanAmerican colleagues in private conversation Monday night—after calling one of them a ‘fucking asshole,’ a ‘bitch’ and a ‘girl,’ the two senators said,” the Herald report read. Artiles’ issue? An apparent belief that Senate President Joe Negron “had been risen to his powerful GOP leadership role because ‘six n-----s’ in the Republican caucus had elected him.” (Eventually, the counternarrative emerged: Artiles was using a variation on the ethnic slur, and his claim was that it wasn’t racial, it’s just how people talk in Hialeah). Gibson told the Herald that an apology would be meaningless. “I can’t remember a time in my life when anybody called me either one of those things … It’s just the most disrespect I’ve ever encountered.” Despite Gibson saying an apology would be meaningless, Artiles apologized—first via statement, then on the Senate floor—in an exercise of futility, because Gibson had no intention of looking him in the eye and letting him walk back his statements. By the end of the week, Artiles resigned. Artiles’ comments required resignation: that was something that pretty much anyone covering the story saw instantly. The delay compelled Artiles’ fellow Republicans, including Rob Bradley of Orange Park, to question the apology itself by Thursday, a development which hinted at the potential success of an expulsion vote. “I thought parts of his apology today were not good enough … I did not appreciate him trying to justify the use of a word who should never be uttered whether you are a senator or not. And so

I’m disappointed by that part of it today,” Bradley said. Throughout the process, there was a dichotomy in response: Democrats dropped statements condemning Artiles, and Republicans sat on their hands. Among the Republicans who sat on their hands were those who should know Gibson best: the Duval County Delegation. If any Republican among that group condemned Artiles in a public statement, I missed it. One could say that illustrates an interesting disconnect in the regional delegation: we can talk about local priorities and loyalties, but asking people to buck the party line in their service clearly is asking too much. Undoubtedly, some reading this ascribe less generous motivations to the public silence of Gibson’s local colleagues on L’Affaire Artiles. The same folks who rush to co-sponsor any legislation that makes them seem two-fisted and Texas-tough (gun bills, anti-terror bills, and all those other measures that look good on re-election mail pieces) punted when given a chance to demonstrate that human decency and defense of a local friend and colleague matter. I don’t get it. Frank Artiles is nothing and no one to us up here. He showed his ass. Everyone in the process knows Audrey Gibson as one of the most principled politicians we’ve got right now. Why not at least a statement of support? It comes off as chickenshit. And the delegation’s inability to do the right thing on the Gibson matter points, yet again, to its downsizing as a statewide force that matters. Aaron Bean, despite his desire to be state CFO, is wounded by the story around CELPHIE, a mental-health self-screening program marketed by the wife of his campaign manager, which ended up getting state funding via the Florida State University budget. In D.C., there are issues also. One congressman’s spending recess week visiting the Mexican border, and the one from out west has harried staffers blow up at the press when they report anything negative about him. People have talked about Audrey Gibson running for Congress against Al Lawson, and until this week it’s seemed more remote than Alvin Brown or someone else out of office. But after last week, with her own delegation not having her back when she needed them, it would be interesting for Gibson to use this moment as a catalyst to run for Congress, taking up the “Jacksonville First” legacy of a friend and political ally whose sacrifice is happening, in slow-motion, downtown at the federal courthouse. A.G. Gancarski mail@folioweekly.com @AGGancarski APRIL 26-MAY 2, 2017 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | 5

VICIOUSLY VIVACIOUS BIANCA DEL RIO

SAT

Bianca Del Rio, whom The New York Times calls “The Joan Rivers of the Drag World,” is the alter ego of comic Roy Haylock, Season 6 winner of RuPaul’s Drag Race, and selfprofessed “clown in a gown.” Del Rio returns to Northeast Florida with more funny anecdotes and quips (told with a refreshingly foul mouth!) 8 p.m. Saturday, April 29, Times-Union Center for the Performing Arts’ Moran Theater, Downtown, $41.50-$150, ticketmaster.com.

OUR PICKS THU

COUNTRY GIANT TRACE ADKINS

Where does Trace Adkins hang his hat? He stands 6 feet, 6 inches tall (6´9˝ with the hat), so we let him set that hat anywhere he damn well pleases! We digress. Since 1995, Adkins has been singing the kinds of no-nonsense tunes, in a bass-baritone, that country fans have gobbled up like biscuits at a Cracker Barrel meditation retreat. The now-55-yearold Adkins has sold 10 million records and been a repeat offender at the top of the Billboard charts. 8 p.m. Thursday, April 27, Thrasher-Horne Center for the Arts, Orange Park, $43-$213, thcenter.org.

REASONS TO LEAVE THE HOUSE THIS WEEK

TAKE ME OUT TO THE (POKÉ) BALL GAME POKÉMON SYMPHONIC EVOLUTIONS

Remember last July, when Trump was just a humorous soundbite and “Pokémon Go” led untold legions of people to walk into each other, oncoming traffic and off bridges in the hunt for an elusive colorful creature that existed until they lost their phones? Yeah, us, too … any old how, Pokémon Symphonic Evolutions features a full orchestra performing arrangements with carefully timed visuals from recent and classic Pokémon video games. Keep an eye out for the naughty Trump-a-poo. 8 p.m. Thursday, April 27, The Florida Theatre, Downtown, $36-$66, floridatheatre.com.

THU

TUE

TOXIC AVENGERS!

POISON RITES A veritable supergroup of sleazoid, highoctane punker carnage, Poison Rites features ex-members of Speedwolf, Scott Baio Army, Hot White and Nicotine Fits. These dashing lads from Denver dole out raucous rock one bruising at a time; their songs like “Everything I Love” and “Not Here Long” are a tip of the hat to the Stooges, MC5, the Dead Boys and other early-to-choir-practice types. Pass the organic, gluten-free glue bag, Archibald! 9 p.m. with Dagger Beach and Rip Junior, Thursday, April 27, Rain Dogs, Riverside, $5. THU

WHOLE LOTTA SOLE KINKY BOOTS

Based on the 2005 film of the same name, the musical Kinky Boots is the story of Charlie Price, recent heir to a shoe factory, and his partnership with the drag queen Lola, whose idea to sell high-heeled boots saves the company. With a book by Harvey Fierstein and music and lyrics by Cyndi Lauper, this Tony Award-winning musical is a winning combination of camp and camaraderie. 7:30 p.m. Tuesday, May 2 and Wednesday, May 3, T-U Center’s Moran Theater, Downtown, $38.50-$99.50; through May 7, fscjartistseries.org. 6 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | APRIL 26-MAY 2, 2017

APRIL 26-MAY 2, 2017 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | 7

Retiring Hubbard House CEO ELLEN SILER looks back on four decades of helping battered women find safety and rediscover self

The

SHERO

he woman said her legs were as scrawny as a chicken’s, so she always wore slacks to hide them. Her arms were so spindly she couldn’t wear short-sleeved blouses. Or tuck her hair behind her ears, because they stuck out so far from her head. Ellen Siler demonstrated how the woman frequently tugged at her hair to make sure her ears were covered. As the CEO of Hubbard House in Jacksonville for the past 19 years and CEO of Quigley House for seven years before that, Ellen Siler has helped tens of thousands of women and children escape domestic violence. Hubbard House provided shelter to 883 women and children and a handful of men in 2015-’16 alone. Siler oversees an annual budget of $4.7 million. The Center helped more than 5,000 victims of domestic violence last year. STORY BY SUSAN COOPER EASTMAN 8 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | APRIL 26-MAY 2, 2017

As she prepares to retire now at 70 years of age, Siler says she’ll never forget that 67-year-old woman with the chicken legs, a woman who’d so internalized the hate and violence rained on her during her 49 years of marriage, she believed her body had to be covered to hide its hideousness. The woman’s story is one of horror, certainly, but Siler describes it as also being an emblem of strength and resilience. Like thousands of other women who’ve been beaten and abused, this woman recovered. “She completely turned her life around. She found a wonderful life that she didn’t know she could have,” says Siler. For 49 years, that woman’s husband beat her. He unplugged the telephones in the house and took them with him to work so she couldn’t make any calls. He told the neighbors that she suffered from dementia and to call him if they saw her outside the house. She didn’t try to escape. The call for help came from a surgeon who telephoned Quigley House in Clay County when Siler was the CEO in the early ’90s. The doctor was scheduled to perform gall bladder surgery on the woman, but she was so incapacitated by anxiety, he wasn’t sure it would be safe. When he broached postponing the surgery, the woman bluntly told him that if he didn’t operate, she’d be dead. Her husband didn’t want to pay for her surgery, so he turned it into a sadistic game. He loaded a single bullet in the barrel of a pistol. For each of the four nights before she’d entered the hospital, he’d spun the barrel, stuck the gun to her head, and pulled the trigger. If she went home without having the surgery, the woman was convinced he’d kill her for sure. After the surgery, and after Quigley House transported her to safety, Siler remembers how the woman began to regain herself in the simplest ways. She wore dresses and skirts and short-sleeved blouses. She tucked her hair behind her ears. It may have been only fashion, but for the woman it symbolized far more. “She changed. To see someone who lived with violence for that long reach that point in life. So many people just give up.” Sometimes people ask Siler how she can manage to do this work. No matter how many women are helped, there are always more. They tell her it must be depressing. “I say, ‘No, it’s joyful,’” she says. Some women arrive in hospital gowns. Others arrive with all their belongings in garbage bags. Many keep their eyes cast down. Ashamed. And then … “To see that same woman standing tall and looking you right in the eye and having a confidence that they didn’t have before … “They become the person they were meant to be. They come to a point where they realize what they experienced isn’t who they are,” she says. The shelter doesn’t track people longterm. Siler says it’s understandable some people want to forget that moment of crisis in their lives when they ran to Hubbard House, and the center never hears from them again. “We have others,” she says, “who will call years later and want to volunteer. Or some will call at a special moment in their lives, to say, ‘My son just made honor roll,’ or ‘I just got my law degree.’”

PHOTOS BY ELLYN MCDONALD

hen Siler joined Hubbard House as CEO in 1998, the shelter had just completed a $4.6 million, 30,000-squarefoot state-of-the art shelter. Siler says that Hubbard House believes it was the first shelter in the U.S. built specifically for domestic violence survivors. It was also the first shelter in Florida to offer an intervention program for batterers, and it was the first shelter in the state to house a licensed childcare facility onsite. All of those innovations predated Siler. In addition to fundraising and managing budget and staff, Siler regarded her mission as making those 30,000 square feet a welcoming place. She thinks she succeeded. “When I go any place,” she says, “I’m looking for the feel of a place. This place feels good. Kids love this place. It has a really good feel. That’s really important to me. Nobody’s yelling. Nobody’s fighting. They know the rules. The kids are scared when they come in here with their moms, but they love being here. It feels good.” Even today, 21 years after the new facility opened in 1976, Hubbard House is impressive. There’s a situation room with a bank of phones where the center staffs a hotline 24 hours a day. There are classrooms where Duval County teachers provide instruction for students in kindergarten up through eighth grade living in the shelter. There’s childcare for preschool children and babies. There’s also a closet stocked with supplies—like toothpaste and toothbrushes, shampoo, diapers, tissues, feminine hygiene products—necessities food stamps won’t buy. Each child receives a small handmade quilt, and they can pick books to keep from the well-stocked shelves of the center’s library. For teenagers, there’s a game room with a dance video machine and a vintage Pac-Man. While leading Folio Weekly on a tour of the facility, Siler explains that Hubbard House focuses on empowering women and keeping families together. Women do their own wash in the laundry room. They share full kitchens where they plan meals, stock the fridge and cook, and where they can eat together as a family. That empowerment and independence extends to staff, she says. She wants the people who work there to feel trusted to make decisions and act. She also believes female leaders need to be comfortable with financials, so each department head at Hubbard House manages her own department budget.

iler became involved in domestic violence issues through the women’s movement in the 1970s. She grew up on the shores of Lake Erie in LaSalle, Michigan. After completing two years of college, she married and had two daughters. When her daughters were 2 and 3 years old in 1971, she and her husband Cliff joined the Peace Corps. They were stationed for two years in Jamaica, where Siler taught swimming. She says she probably had the best job in the Peace Corps, but adds that it was important work because at the time, only four percent of the population of the island nation knew how to swim. She also explains how the experience helped her understand how much work is involved when one is without money and modern conveniences. She did the family’s wash by hand and walked to the grocery store and carried the groceries home, with a daughter on each side. When she returned to Michigan, Siler worked as an aquatics and physical education director for the YMCA in Bay City. She became involved in women’s issues when the Y asked her to serve on a newly formed women’s coalition. It was a time when women all over the nation began organizing to address violence against women by creating their own institutions to fight it. In Jacksonville, a group of women organized a rape crisis hotline. When they received calls for help from battered women, they expanded the hotline to address the larger need. In 1976, the women bought a cottage in Springfield on Hubbard Street to use as a domestic violence shelter and staffed it with volunteers. Meanwhile, in Bay City, the women’s coalition started a hotline. When they realized the need for a domestic violence shelter, some of the women began opening their homes as temporary shelters. Siler made her home available to women with children. At the time, she says, she didn’t think about the danger she might have put her family in by doing that. “I might get a call at 2 a.m. saying … ‘We are putting a woman and two children in a taxi and they will be at your house in 15 minutes’,” she remembers. “I would get my children out of bed, put them in sleeping bags on the living room floor, change the sheets and be ready to welcome them.” Women in Jacksonville and Bay City and all over the country began rape crisis centers, women’s shelters and hotlines in the 1970s because there was little help for victims and little understanding of rape and domestic violence as a crime. The women’s movement didn’t just open shelters and staff hotlines, they began a re-education campaign to change attitudes and lobbied for changes in laws. “It is really fascinating to me that within a short time span, all over the country, a great awareness was growing about this issue and women were stepping up to address it. “We didn’t have the laws to protect women that we have now,” Siler explains. “Domestic violence in and of itself is against the law now. Police can arrest on probable cause. It used to be [that] if no one saw what happened, it became a he said/she said. She said he broke her arm. He said she fell down the stairs. “The problem is that people are still dying. Most of those people never called Hubbard House. There is no way to intervene if you don’t know what is happening in that relationship.

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Siler intends to remain involved in what she describes as “the movement” after she retires. APRIL 26-MAY 2, 2017 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | 9

“[In the 1970s], we didn’t have the laws to protect women that we have now,” Siler says. “… It used to be [that] if no one saw what happened, it became a he said/she said.”

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That’s why education is so important. We’ve been around for 40 years, but there are still people who don’t realize that help is available, who don’t realize there are laws to protect them.” A few years after Siler’s family moved to Jacksonville in 1985, she saw an advertisement for an assistant director position at Hubbard House. She thought it would be ideal for her: Get paid to do work she loved. She stayed at Hubbard House for a year and then Quigley House hired her as CEO. She worked at the Clay County shelter for seven years before returning to Hubbard House as CEO in 1998. Siler says she wishes the anti-domestic violence campaign had the same funding the anti-tobacco people received from the court case settlement with the tobacco industry. “Who knows? If we did, we might have more people openly speaking up and condemning somebody who talks in a demeaning way to a woman or when someone witnesses anybody treating somebody inferior,” she says. Siler promised herself when she turned 70, she’d retire. Siler says she’ll remain involved in what she still describes as “the movement” and will continue to serve on the Florida Coalition Against Domestic Violence, the organization that brings together Florida’s 42 domestic violence shelters into one entity. Siler is a past president of the organization. When the board picks the next CEO, however, board president Bob Baldwin says Siler has made it clear she won’t stick around for the transition. He says that’s a sign of her humility and insight. She wants the next CEO to come in and feel empowered to make improvements. “She wants the new leader to come in and establish themselves. That’s the kind of wisdom and guidance she has,” says Baldwin. “She knows it’s important for a new person to establish themselves and to move Hubbard house to the next level.” While Siler was CEO, Hubbard House completed a 5,000-square-foot addition to the facility. In 2006, board members raised $5.5 million for an endowment fund that now holds $7 million and insulates the shelter from economic uncertainties. The shelter also opened a 10,000-square-foot thrift store on Beach Boulevard and a 5,000-square-foot drop-in center that’s open to the public.

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helter manager Stacey O’Brien keeps a photograph on her desk at Hubbard House of the day in 1998 she came in with her three-year-

old daughter, seeking shelter. The building had just opened and everything was new. “The draperies all matched,” she recalls, but she doesn’t remember anybody she met. “I remember just a feeling that I loved this place, and I loved that this place was here to help,” she says. After she began working at the center, she learned one of the women she supervised was the one who welcomed her that day. O’Brien describes Siler as quiet, as a person who listens. She doesn’t talk much, and you might not know what she’s thinking, explains O’Brien, but then a change will happen—sometimes a huge change. “Back when I first became an advocate, we expected people to be in at a certain time if they were staying here,” O’Brien explains. “I went to Ellen and said that I had a concern about women who were grown adults not being fearful of losing their space in the shelter if they were out after midnight. “She didn’t give me a lot of feedback in the moment. But the next day when I came in, the policy was gone. She never told anyone I was the one who went to her. She never outed me as someone who came to her to talk about it. But I’m confident if I go to her and if it is something valid, a change will be made.” Board president Baldwin says he’s seen Siler use her quiet leadership to guide staff to solve problems with an employee who isn’t doing their job, to address a problem with an air-conditioning unit, or to solve some issue that the board is facing. “She is a quiet, strong leader who is able to lead through listening,” says Baldwin, “through guiding, through supporting. She’s not the kind of leader who feels the need to direct. She’s the kind of leader who feels the need to guide and support and reach consensus and agreement. “From a board perspective, she is always first to listen and second to offer her opinion, and I think that allows the board to think big and think creatively.” O’Brien agrees that Siler has been an extraordinary leader. “She is a rock to a lot of people here, and I am really sad to see her go,” says O’Brien. “Talking about it, I start to tear up. “She is a true Shero for me.” Although the woman with the chicken legs and her husband have died, she was a Shero to Siler as well, as are the countless other women who sought safety and found self. She remembers the moment that, for her, marked the 67-year-old’s new life. “The day we took her to get her ears pierced, the joy and pride on her face is something I will never forget,” says Ellen Siler. Susan Cooper Eastman mail@folioweekly.com

APRIL 26-MAY 2, 2017 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | 11

12 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | APRIL 26-MAY 2, 2017

FOLIO A+E : MAGIC LANTERNS

ROPIN’, RIDIN’ &

T-REX Movie monsters and dinosaurs roam the WILD WILD WEST

ere are two from the vaults of yesteryear, before CGI and computer-enhanced visuals in the hands of Steven Spielberg or Peter Jackson eschewed the magic of stop-motion animation, at least for live-action films. Prior to the digital age, when dinosaurs walked on the celluloid screen, fighting each other as well as humans, the giants who made them move were artists like Willis O’Brien (the original King Kong) and his former pupil Ray Harryhausen. They painstakingly handcrafted with clay models and a camera. Such efforts might seem old-fashioned and outdated to younger audiences, but older viewers can still enjoy and appreciate such films for their fun and their artistry. The Beast of Hollow Mountain (1956) and The Valley of Gwangi (1969) might not be the best of the genre, but they should still have plenty of appeal for faithful fans, especially in their new Blu-ray incarnations. Inspired by a lifelong dream of the great O’Brien to combine cowboys and dinosaurs in a film (a project O’Brien never realized), The Beast of Hollow Mountain was the brainchild of the Nassour brothers, old pros in the B to C range of Hollywood land, with careers dating back to the ’30s. This is probably their most celebrated creation. Clocking in at 80 minutes running time, the first hour of the film focuses on romantic melodrama South of the Border featuring gringo Jimmy Ryan (Guy Madison), Senorita Sarita (Patricia Medina), a bad guy, a little boy, and lots of cattle. The Beast (a hybrid of an allosaurus and a tyrannosaurus) shows up in the last 20 minutes, mostly impressive but occasionally silly, particularly so when he waggles a red forked tongue. Until the Beast arrives, the best thing going for the film is Madison, a likable, appealing actor best known then as the star of the popular TV Western, The Adventures of Wild Bill Hickcok, co-starring Andy Devine. As Wild Bill, buckskinclad Madison wore his two six-guns with their butts reversed in the holsters, nonsensical but neat-looking. At one point in The Beast of Hollow Mountain, Madison goes to holster his gun, unconsciously reversing it like he did every week on TV, 1951-’58, as Wild Bill. Apparently, the directors either didn’t notice or didn’t care or, quite possibly, were too conscious of costs to reshoot the scene. It’s a minor gaffe that makes the movie even more fun for observant fans. The Valley of Gwangi (1969) features much more animation and imagination than its predecessor, but it’s similarly mired in claptrap as far as the human story. It’s not surprising the creatures are the best thing about the movie, since the visual effects were the work of Ray Harryhausen, the stop-motion wizard responsible for such classics as The Beast from 20,000 Fathoms, It Came from Beneath the Sea, Jason and the Argonauts and many more. However, the film itself was one of his least successful when it opened, which must have

been rather disappointing for Harryhausen, since the seeds of its plot were deliberately attributable (probably a conscious tribute, in fact) to his mentor O’Brien. What’s wrong with Gwangi is the screenplay; it starts with gypsies and curses, morphs into a cowboy-circus flick, then tries to combine all three elements into a hidden-valley-with-dinosaurs adventure, before bringing everyone back to town for the finale. It doesn’t help that scarcely any of the human characters are particularly likable, though the actors aren’t too bad. James Franciscus (more a TV star at the time) is the somewhat cynical Tuck, who returns to ex-girlfriend T.J. (Gila Golan) who, along with Champ (’50s genre favorite Richard Carlson), is trying to make a go of it with her wild west circus show in Mexico around the turn of the century. The creaky plot enables them to find, fight and rope some dinosaurs (nicely animated and filmed), one of which (Gwangi) they bring back to the circus. Naturally, it gets loose and creates mayhem, just like O’Brien’s King Kong and Harryhausen’s own memorable Ymir in the classic Twenty Million Years to Earth (1957). Kong met his end on the Empire State Building and the Ymir in the Roman Colosseum—hapless Gwangi is killed in a burning cathedral. Though everyone else wants the dinosaur destroyed, a little boy cries as the flaming building collapses on poor Gwangi. The kid has the right attitude! With the exception of Mighty Joe Young, it seems that all stop-motion animated monsters (the real stars of their films) were doomed to die at the hands of men. It would take Spielberg’s Jurassic Park films to finally give the luckless beasts a break. Though certainly not classics, The Beast of Hollow Mountain and The Valley of Gwangi are nonetheless vivid reminders of a nearly forgotten form of movie magic. Pat McLeod mail@folioweekly.com

NOWSHOWING AMERICAN WRESTLER: THE WIZARD The premiere of the fact-based film is screened one night only, 4 and 7:30 p.m. May 3 at Regal Avenues, 9525 Philips Hwy., Southside and AMC Regency, 9451 Regency Square Blvd., Arlington. It stars Jon Voight, William Fichtner an George Kosturos. SUN-RAY CINEMA Free Fire and Colossal currently screen at 1028 Park St., 359-0049, sunraycinema. com. Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 2 starts May 4. CORAZON CINEMA & CAFÉ Angel & the Badman and The Fate of the Furious screen. Throwback Thursday screens Life is Beautiful at noon; Cult Classic is The Room, 8 p.m. April 27. Lion and life start April 28. 36 Granada St., St. Augustine, 679-5736, corazoncinemaandcafe.com. IMAX THEATER The Fate of the Furious, Dream Big and Extreme Weather screen at World Golf Village IMAX Theater, St. Augustine, 940-4133, worldgolfimax.com.

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APRIL 26-MAY 2, 2017 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | 13

ARTS + EVENTS PERFORMANCE

BIANCA DEL RIO Comic Roy Haylock’s (RuPaul’s Drag Race winner, self-professed “clown in a gown”) alter ego brings her funny anecdotes (told with a foul mouth!) to the stage, 8 p.m. April 29, Times-Union Center for the Performing Arts’ Moran Theater, 300 Water St., Downtown, 633-6110, $41.50-$150, ticketmaster.com. DASOTA THEATRE SHOWCASE Students from D.A. School of The Arts’ Theatre Department perform showcase works, 7:30 p.m. April 26, 2445 San Diego Rd., San Marco, 346-5620 ext. 122, datheatreboosters.org. MICHAEL ALAN PERFORMANCE NYC-based artist Alan creates a surreal human installation in his solo show and live draw-a-thon, 7 p.m. April 28, Space 42, 2670 Phyllis St., Riverside, $20, spacefortytwo.com. THREE TALL WOMEN Players By The Sea stages Edward Albee’s Pulitzer-winning play about a 90-yearold woman who looks back on the highs and lows of her life, 8 p.m. April 28 & 29, 106 Sixth St. N., Jax Beach, 249-0289, $23; $20 seniors/military/students, through May 7, playersbythesea.org. KINKY BOOTS The fun musical about friendship, with an original score by Cyndi Lauper, is staged 7:30 p.m. May 2-4; 8 p.m. May 5; 2 & 8 p.m. May 6; 1:30 & 7 p.m. May 7, T-U Center’s Moran Theater, 442-2929, $38.50$99.50, fscjartistseries.org. A NEW BRAIN The 5 & Dime stages a sardonic, comical musical about a composer during a medical emergency, 8 p.m. April 28 & 29; 2 p.m. April 30, 112 E. Adams St., Downtown; through May 7, $25, the5anddime.org. DREAMGIRLS Alhambra Theatre & Dining presents the popular musical about the rise and fall of a 1960s vocal group, The Dreams, through May 21. Dinner 6 p.m.; brunch noon, Executive Chef DeJuan Roy’s themed menu; 12000 Beach Blvd., Southside, $35-$62 + tax, 641-1212, alhambrajax.com. I OUGHT TO BE IN PICTURES Limelight Theatre stages Neil Simon’s story of a 19-year-old New Yorker in Hollywood to be a screenwriter and actor (a revival of the first play Limelight staged 25 years ago), 7:30 p.m. April 27- 29; 2 p.m. April 30 at 11 Old Mission Ave., St. Augustine, 825-1164, $26; $24 seniors, $20 military/students; $10 student rush; through May 14, limelight-theatre.org. STEEL MAGNOLIAS Theatre Jacksonville stages Robert Harling’s much-loved play about women who work at and get styled by Truvy’s beauty salon in Chinquapin, Louisiana, 7:30 p.m. April 27; 8 p.m. April 28 & 29; 2 p.m. April 30 at 2032 San Marco Blvd., 396-4425, $25; $20 seniors/military/students Thur. & Sun.; through May 7, theatrejax.com. DASOTA SENIOR Seniors in Douglas Anderson School of the Arts’ Theatre Department present their works, 7:30 p.m. May 3 at the school, 346-5620 ext. 122, datheatreboosters.org. THE LION KING JR. Apex Theatre Studio’s Junior Musical Theater workshop stages this family-geared musical, featuring Simba and the whole gang from the popular Disney tale (pun!), 7 p.m. April 28 and 12:30 and 7 p.m. April 29 at Ponte Vedra Concert Hall, 1050 A1A N., 209-0399, $15, pvconcerthall.com.

CLASSICAL & JAZZ

POKÉMON SYMPHONIC EVOLUTIONS A full orchestra performs arrangements with carefully timed visuals from recent and classic Pokémon video games, 8 p.m. April 27 at The Florida Theatre, 128 E. Forsyth St., Downtown, 355-2787, $36-$66, floridatheatre.com. PATHÉTIQUE Violinist Ayano Nimomiya and the Jacksonville Symphony perform Tchaikovsky’s Symphony No. 6–Pathétique and Stravinsky’s Violin Concerto, 8 p.m. April 28 & 29 and 3 p.m. April 30 at the T-U Center’s Jacoby Symphony Hall, Downtown, 354-5547, $27-$77, jaxsymphony.org. THE NORTH FLORIDA WOMEN’S CHORALE The Chorale sings Food for Body and Soul: A Musical Feast for the Ears, 3 p.m. April 30 at Beaches Chapel Church, 610 Florida Blvd., Neptune Beach, womenschorale.org. BLUEGRASS AT THE LIBRARY Bluegrass artists Ernie & Debi Evans perform, 6:30 p.m. May 3 at Clay County Headquarters Library, 1895 Town Center Blvd., Fleming Island, 278-3722, claycountygov.com. THE DYNAMIC LES DEMERLE JAZZ TRIO The trio, with vocalist Bonnie Eisele, is on 6-9 p.m. every Fri. in April at Horizons Restaurant, 5472 First Coast Hwy., Fernandina, 321-2430, $15, horizonsameliaisland.com. TAYLOR ROBERTS The jazz guitarist plays 7-10 p.m. every Wed., Ocean 60, 60 Ocean Blvd., Atlantic Beach, 247-0060, ocean60.com. Roberts is in 4-9 p.m. every Thur. at the lobby bar; 6-10 p.m. every Fri. & Sat., Salt 14 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | APRIL 26-MAY 2, 2017

FOLIO A+E : ARTS

Restaurant, both at Ritz-Carlton, 4750 Amelia Island Pkwy., Fernandina, 277-1100, ritzcarlton.com.

COMEDY

FRED’S ALL-STAR COMEDIANS Local comedians Leroy, Donna and others appear 7:30 p.m. April 26; Ron, Bob and others appear 7:30 p.m. April 27 at The Comedy Zone, 3130 Hartley Rd., Mandarin, 292-4242, $10, comedyzone.com. MICHAEL BLACKSON Comic Blackson (Def Comedy Jam, Showtime at Harlem), known as the “The African King of Comedy,” appears 7:30 and 10 p.m. April 28 & 29 and 7 p.m. April 30 at The Comedy Zone, 292-4242, $25-$45, comedyzone.com. ANTHONY DEMMER Comedian Demmer (Comic View, Comedy Spin) appears 8 p.m. April 27 at The Comedy Club of Jacksonville, 11000 Beach Blvd., Southside, 646-4277, $15-$30, jacksonvillecomedy.com. RODNEY PERRY Comedian Perry (Off the Chain, Who’s Got Jokes) is on 8 and 10:30 p.m. April 28 & 29 at The Comedy Club of Jacksonville, 646-4277, $18-$35, jacksonvillecomedy.com. HOT POTATO COMEDY HOUR Chris Buck MCs local comics 9 p.m. every Mon., Rain Dogs., 1045 Park St., Riverside, free, 379-4969. SPLIFF’S OPEN MIC COMEDY The gastropub holds open mic 9 p.m. every Tue., 15 Ocean St., Downtown, 844-5000. COMEDY UNCORKED Patrick Dalton MCs local, regional comics 7 p.m. every Wed., The Wine Bar, 320 N. First St., Jax Beach, 442-0755, thewinebaruncorked.com.

CALLS & WORKSHOPS

NEW TOWN URBAN FARM Urban Geoponics and New Town are developing a large community garden at Pearce and West Third streets, in the New Town/ Edward Waters area, Northside, to provide fresh produce and a hands-on, open-air center of learning for the community and area students. Urban Farm meets 10 a.m.-1 p.m. every Sun. Details, call DialloSekou, 706-284-9808. SMALL BUSINESS ADVICE WORKSHOP SERIES Jacksonville Public Library and SCORE, Counselors to America’s Small Business, offer free workshops to help start and/or improve a small business, held 5:30-7 p.m. the third Monday of the month at Southeast Regional Library, 10599 Deerwood Park Blvd., 630-2665, jaxpubliclibrary.org. May 15, How do I start a home based business in Jacksonville?; June 19, Where can I find financing for my small business?; July 17, How do I develop a product or service to sell?; Aug. 21, How do I determine my product’s sales potential and target customers?; Sept. 18, What are the best face-to-face selling techniques?; Oct. 16, How can I generate sales to the government?; Nov. 20, Is crowdfunding right for my business? Registration is recommended; each class is limited to 25; jaxpubliclibrary.org/events/smallbiz.

ART WALKS & MARKETS

AFRICAN VILLAGE BAZAAR Vendors, exhibitors, local speakers, painters, designers, authors and small businesses are featured noon-6 p.m. April 30 and the last Sun. of the month through November at The Ritz Theatre & Museum, 829 N. Davis St., Downtown, 807-2010, africanvillageinc.org, ritzjacksonville.com. CONSCIOUS MARKET Tastes and sips mingle, 7-11 p.m. April 29 and every Sat. at Conscious Eats, 5913 St. Augustine Rd., Ste. 5, Mandarin, 612-3934. Bring a donation of dried beans, rices, quinoas, other grains. Proceeds benefit Conscious Market/Character Counts programs. WHITE HARVEST FARMS & FARMER’S MARKET Local organic, fresh produce, 10 a.m.-5 p.m. every Sat., 5348 Moncrief Rd., Northside, 354-4162; proceeds benefit Clara White Mission, clarawhitemission.org. RIVERSIDE ARTS MARKET Local, regional art, morning yoga 9 a.m., local dance–Ballet Arts Centre, FSCJ DanceWorks, Unforced Rhythms Dance, Scott Jones Dancers, LaVilla SOA Dance-food and farmers market, 10 a.m.-4 p.m. April 29 and every Sat. under Fuller Warren Bridge, 715 Riverside Ave., free admission, 389-2449, riversideartsmarket.com. UPTOWN SATURDAY NIGHT The self-guided tour features galleries, antique stores and shops open 5-9 p.m. every last Sat. in St. Augustine’s San Marco District, 824-3152.

MUSEUMS

BEACHES MUSEUM & HISTORY PARK 381 Beach Blvd., Jax Beach, 241-5657, beachesmuseum.org. Atlantic Beach: From the Continental to a Coastal Community displays through June 11.

AVANTUNDERGRAD I

nside the courtyard of the recently redeveloped San Marco Train Station property, a cluster of bicycles painted vivid red–steel frames crisscrossing like a cat’s cradle string, wheels pointed in virtually every direction–rest atop a single metal pole. It’s an arresting composition, especially in the midday Florida sun. Artist and Florida State College at Jacksonville professor Dustin Harewood remembers the first time he saw it. “I was driving by and the sculpture actually startled me!” he says. “The color was bold. The form was fresh and dynamic.” Intrigued, he inquired about the artist responsible. He was shocked by what he discovered. Nineteen-year-old Morgan Ashurian created the piece, called “Human Intersection,” after pitching the idea to her father, who owns Ashco Developers, the company that took over the San Marco Train Station in 2008. “My family is very arts-oriented,” the Boston University sophomore told Folio Weekly over the phone. “My mom was really involved in the arts and she kind of led me to initiate my passion at an early age.” Determined to make use of skills she developed in sculpture classes at The Bolles School, Ashurian set her sights on creating a sculpture that represented the vibrancy of her neighborhood. “San Marco’s a very diverse area,” she says. “There’s a flow to it–with arts and culture. And there are a lot of schools there. I think it’s important to recognize that diversity in our communities can really make them flourish.” Drawn to the imagery of bicycles carrying people around the neighborhood, she shopped around, eventually amassing a few dozen twowheelers from Salvation Army auctions. “There were kids’ bikes, adult bikes, mountain bikes, all these different types,” she recalls. “All the components of this sculpture come from different people, with different backgrounds and different stories.” Working from a makeshift art space in the then-vacant San Marco Train Station property, Ashurian cut the bike frames, then welded the metal pieces. To add a dynamic element, Ashurian wanted to make sure the sculpture could turn. She applied and was granted engineer certifications.

Jacksonville native and Boston University sophomore’s sculptures are TURNING HEADS Shortly after first glimpsing Ashurian’s sculpture, Harewood enlisted his FSCJ colleague Mark Creegan and then-Dean Richard Greene to look into bringing a similar sculpture to FSCJ’s Kent Campus. “We knew that we didn’t want a traditional sculpture,” Harewood says. “The moment I saw Morgan’s piece, I immediately became obsessed with the idea of having it at Kent.” Harewood called Ashco Developers, where Ashurian was working, to ask if she would create a piece of art for FSCJ’s Kent Campus. “I said ‘yes, absolutely, I agree,’” she says. Ashurian worked on the concept for her second large-scale sculpture for nearly a year-and-a-half. She says it was important to her to “get a feel for what FSCJ means to the community.” She decided on a larger version of “Human Intersection.” “I really tried to amp it up a bit,” she says of the second generation of her sculpture, a piece called “Unifying Diversity.” She chose a spirited, nearly neon green, used more bikes and higher-gauge steel for the construction. “After we got all of the sketches approved and the permits figured out, it was similar in the way it was constructed,” she says. “The arrangement of various styles, sizes and directions of bikes are metaphors for human diversity,” Ashurian wrote in the sculpture’s description. “The sculpture’s steel frame and green color bring unity to these fragments while preserving their differences. Similarly, when individuals steer themselves towards diversity, communities become harmonious vehicles that enrich the essence of our humanity.” This spring, as word of Ashurian’s work began to spread around BU, she was invited to display photos of her projects in an art show at the university. Only a few of her professors know about her artwork. “I try to keep it on the down-low,” she says, laughing. “Part of the FSCJ sculpture is that it’s meant to be a dedication to the teachers that really help students reach their potential. I don’t want to do it for the acclaim. It’s really for the community–the people that support others. For me to be able to serve the community through art, that’s fantastic.” Matthew B. Shaw mail@folioweekly.com

ARTS + EVENTS CUMMER MUSEUM OF ART & GARDENS 29 Riverside Ave., 356-6857, cummermuseum.org. Free admission every first Sat. Poetry of Landscape: The Art of Eugène Louis Charvot (1847-1924) displays through Sept. 10; An American in Venice: James McNeill Whistler & His Legacy displays through July 20. David Ponsler: Chasing Shadows displays through Oct. 4. KARPELES MANUSCRIPT LIBRARY MUSEUM 101 W. First St., Springfield, 356-2992, rain.org/~karpeles/jax. html. Humanity: The Value of a Life, works by Jenny Hager, Lance Vickery, Rosana Casco, Troy Eittreim, Caitlin Flynn, Jane Griffo, Mal Jones, Cal Oglesby, Deborah Reid, Tracie Thornton and Ithiell Israel, through April 27. The Long Distance Telephone, a manuscript by Alexander Graham Bell, through April 26. MUSEUM OF SCIENCE & HISTORY 1025 Museum Cir., Southbank, 396-6674, themosh.org. Painter Kathy Stark’s The Wilderness of North Florida’s Parks is on display through May 29. Science & History boat tours, 1 & 3:30 p.m. April 22 and every Sat., $15 adults, $12 kids. MUSEUM OF CONTEMPORARY ART JACKSONVILLE 333 N. Laura St., 366-6911, mocajacksonville.unf.edu. Project Atrium: Lauren Fensterstock displays through June 18. Hans Hofmann: Works on Paper and The Evolution of Mark-Making display through May 14.

GALLERIES

ADELE GRAGE CULTURAL CENTER 716 Ocean Blvd., Atlantic Beach, 247-5828, coab.us. Landscape exhibit, Coastal Atlantic, new works by Gordon Russell, displays through April. THE ART CENTER GALLERY Jacksonville Landing, Ste. 139, 233-9252, tacjacksonville.org. Marsha Hatcher is April’s featured artist. The juried show Abstraction at its Best runs through May 19. CREATIVE SOUL GALLERY St. Augustine Outlet Mall, 510 Outlet Mall Blvd., Ste. 1070, creativesoulsaintaugustine. com. St. Augustine Camera Club’s sixth annual Member Photography Show runs through May 16. CULTURAL CENTER AT PONTE VEDRA BEACH 50 Executive Way, 280-0614, ccpvb.org. Glass & Serigraphs: New Works by Thomas Kite & Daryl Bunn, displays through May 26. FLORIDA MINING GALLERY 5300 Shad Rd., Southside, 535-7252, floridamininggallery.com. Christina Foard’s recent paintings display through May 5. THE GALLERY AT ONE OCEAN 1 Ocean Blvd., Atlantic Beach, 249-7402, oneoceanresort.com. In partnership with Stellers Gallery, the space exhibits Where the Earth Meets the Sky, by mixed media fine art painter John Schuyler. LUFRANO INTERCULTURAL GALLERY 1 UNF Dr., Student Union Bldg. 58 E., Ste. 2401. 620-2475, unf.edu/gallery. Cathedral Arts Project exhibit, County Missives: Expressive Works by Incarcerated Juveniles Adjudicated as Adults, displays through June 30. MAKERSPACE GALLERY Main Library, 303 N. Laura St., Downtown, 630-2665, jaxpubliclibrary.org/jax-makerspace. Collage 101 tutorial is 10 a.m.-1 p.m. April 27. Crafternoon: Sew Good sewing class is 3-4 p.m. April 27. Women Writing for (a) Change writing circle is noon-1 p.m. April 28; free. PLUM GALLERY 10 Aviles St., St. Augustine, 825-0069, plumartgallery.com. Works by Wendy Tatter, George Ann Gillespie and Jackie Kramer show through May. SOUTHLIGHT GALLERY Bank of America Tower, 50 N. Laura St., Ste. 150, 438-4358, southlightgallery.com. Rita Kenyon is April’s featured artist. The co-op shows 20 local artists’ works. THE SPACE GALLERY 120 E. Forsyth St., Downtown,

thespacegalleryjax.com. More Than This, works by Matthew S. Bennett, Jan Tomlinson Master and Lana Shuttleworth, runs through May. SUBLIME ORIGINAL GALLERY The DeLO, 420 Broad St., Downtown, 901-5515, sublimeoriginal.com. The photography exhibit Raw Beauty is on display. ST. AUGUSTINE ART ASSOCIATION 22 Marine St., 824-2310, staaa.org. A 10-day citywide Plein Air Paint Out runs through April 30; details on website. STELLERS GALLERY AT PONTE VEDRA 240 A1A N., Ste. 13, 273-6065, stellersgallery.com. An opening reception for an exhibit of new works by Erin Gregory and Laura Lacambra Shubert is 6-9 p.m. April 27.

EVENTS

DINNER & A MOVIE St. Johns County Council on Aging screens Woman in Gold, with Helen Mirren and Ryan Reynolds, 4:30-7:30 p.m. April 27 at River House, 179 Marine St., St. Augustine, $13 members, $16 nonmembers; 209-3646, coasjc.org. JUMBO SHRIMP VS. BAYBEARS The Jacksonville Jumbo Shrimp’s inaugural season continues with a homestand against the Mobile BayBears, 7:05 p.m. April 27 (Mavericks Live Thirsty Thursday), April 28 (fireworks, Red Shirt Friday), 6:05 p.m. April 29 (Jumbo Shrimp Shirt giveaway, Boy Scout Night), 3:05 p.m. April 30 (Sunday Family FUNday, Bugs Bunny Day) and 12:05 p.m. May 1 (Charity Begins at Home, City Skip Day), at Bragan Field, Baseball Grounds, Downtown, single game tix $9 (check website), 358-2846, jaxshrimp.com. Next up: Biloxi Shuckers! PARTY ON THE PATIO A silent auction and raffle, $10 barbecue dinner and live music—Jake Slater, Ivan Pulley, Chris Tyler, Lift, Jay Garrett, Back in Time, Hijacking Honey—are featured at the fundraiser, 2 p.m.2 a.m. April 29 at Flight 747 Lounge, 1500 Airport Rd., Northside, 741-4331, flight747lounge.com. Proceeds benefit The Florida School for the Deaf & the Blind. INTERSECTIONS: A WILD GOOSE EVENT Spirit, justice, music and art, 11 a.m.-9 p.m. April 29, Klutho Park, 204 W. Third St., Springfield, intersectionsjax.com. RAP SPRING TOUR OF HOMES The 43rd annual tour includes 11 homes, three commercial sites and other locations, April 29 & 30; $25; proceeds benefit Riverside Avondale Preservation; for tickets and details, go to raphometour.com. STRIDES FOR PRIDE 5K The sixth annual 5K Run/ Walk is 8 a.m.-1 p.m. April 29 at Riverside Park, 753 Park St., to show pride and support for young LGBTQ people. Food trucks, music and games. Proceeds benefit JASMYN (Jacksonville Area Sexual Minority Youth Network), jasmyn.org. HEAL AUTISM WALK The annual is 8:30 a.m. (registration 7:30 a.m.) April 30 at Jacksonville Zoo & Gardens, 370 Zoo Parkway. Games, activities, music, bounce houses. Author Nick Loren (Farful Foolong from Oolong Panshoo and the Grey Bubble-Goo) is on hand. Admission $15; ages 12 and younger admitted free. Proceeds directly benefit First Coast autism programs, camps and schools. AUTHOR SARAH GERARD Independent literary publisher Bridge Eight presents New York-based author Gerard, as part of the Abridged Reading Series, 7 p.m. May 1 at Bab’s Lab, CoRK Arts District, 2689 Rosselle St., Riverside; corkartsdistrict.com. Gerard reads and signs copies of her new book, Sunshine State: Essays. __________________________________________ To list an event, send time, date, location (street address, city), admission price, contact number to print to Daniel A. Brown; email dbrown@folioweekly. com or mail 45 W. Bay St., Ste. 103, Jacksonville FL 32202. Items run as space is available. Deadline noon Wed. for next Wed. printing.

ARTIST MICHAEL ALAN

Acclaimed NYC-based artist ALAN, known for staging drawing marathons, creates a surreal human performance/installation April 28 at Space 42, Riverside.

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16 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | APRIL 26-MAY 2, 2017

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FOLIO A+E : MUSIC

teven Marshek spent six years playing bass and sharing songwriting credits with the harmonious, lo-fi garage trio The Lifeforms. The band introduced local audiences to the primitive sounds of the ’60s and amassed a following based on their raucous live performance. Since leaving The Lifeforms in late 2016, Marshek has been busy working on several new projects including a newly released solo EP, while continuing to wow local crowds with his own rowdy brand of rock ’n’ roll. “I’ve always been more about the performance, rather than the recording,” Marshek told Folio Weekly over the phone. Marshek’s recent (mildly unhinged) performance during the Volcom-sponsored Burger Revolution at The Space Gallery in Downtown Jacksonville—which may or may not have resulted in the destruction of at least one microphone stand—earned a glowing review on the surf brand’s website. Marshek is apt to leap from the stage into the crowd, or fall to his knees—à la the late Chuck Berry— to deliver impassioned solos. “I want people to leave feeling like they’ve experienced something they’ll remember,” Marshek says of the live shows staged by The Steven Marshek Group. Aside from Marshek’s original tunes, the group mixes in adrenalized covers from various eras of rock ’n’ roll, from Big Bopper period classics like Little Richard’s “Tutti Frutti” to early punk thrashers like The Stooges’ “Now I Wanna be Your Dog.” “My main thing is thinking abut how [the audience] feel[s] going in,” Marshek says. “Whether it’s getting into the crowd and waking people up a bit or just dancing—I want to give them something outside of their bored, crunchy band T-shirt experience.” The 28-year-old Marshek stresses that, in today’s digital age, it’s important that live rock ’n’ roll performances give off an air of intimacy and passion. “I think, with our generation, things are too immediate or easy,” he says. “It’s the problem of having choices. You can do whatever you want, but you choose to just stay on your couch watching YouTube. A rock ’n’ roll show has got to give people something more than they get from their computer screen.” A 2007 D.U. Fletcher High School graduate, Marshek enjoyed listening to the local Oldies stations growing up. He says when his friends introduced him to “the cooler shit” like “Velvet Underground and The Stooges,” it made him really want to play music.

THE STEVEN MARSHEK GROUP, GOV CLUB 9 p.m. May 5, Planet Sarbez!, St. Augustine, $5, 18 & up

In 2011, Marshek linked up with longtime friend Jeff Flores and the two started The Lifeforms. Playing tunes with infectious hooks on vintage equipment, The Lifeforms’ ascension coincided with an imminent garage rock revival (it happens every 10 years or so) sparked by the popularity of grassroots labels like California’s Burger Records and the mainstream success of bands like The Black Keys and The White Stripes. “The whole thing with [The Lifeforms] was, we wanted to be The Beatles,” Marshek says, referring to the tendency of the Fab Four to both mimic the sounds of their early rock ’n’ roll predecessors and to share songwriting and lead singing duties. “[Flores and I] both 18 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | APRIL 26-MAY 2, 2017

With a new EP of PRIMAL ROCK ’N’ ROLL, former Lifeforms frontman looks to wake Millennials from a digital-induced drowse

SHAKIN’ ALL OVER

AGAIN wanted to sing songs and write songs. We wanted harmonies and good energy.” The band certainly captured the energy of rock ’n’ roll’s bygone primacy quite well—so well, in fact, they were asked to join former Nerves frontman Paul Collins on three tours across the United States. Marshek looks back fondly on his time with The Lifeforms. “We had a lot of fun,” he says. “We made three little records. We traveled. We were on the same page musically. And even when we weren’t getting along, it was fun to play those songs.” The Lifeforms continue to play and record, minus Marshek. And though he says there’s no official breakup story to tell, he offers that his insatiable desire to keep working on new material and to constantly play live shows contributed to the band’s dissolution. “I was doing stuff on the side out of boredom—making my own songs on Garageband and stuff,” Marshek recalls. “I think in their eyes it came across as I don’t want to do [The Lifeforms] anymore.” Marshek spent last year piecing together a new group—though not having reliable accompaniment never kept him from booking shows or recording new music. He’s now found a fairly stable group of collaborators, including guitarist Nishant Ghose, bassist Thomas Pritchard and multi-instrumentalist Leroy Copeland Jr., who was enlisted to help play drums, bass and add backing vocals, as well as engineer Marshek’s new EP Sounding It Out. Released in late April, Sounding includes five tracks of vintage rock ’n’ roll with

Marshek on guitar, harmonica and lead vocals. The opening tune “No One Dances” starts with Marshek’s straight-harp lead, before the frontman telegraphs a jank-y, Elvis Costello-esque guitar progression and straight-ahead drumbeat with a playful “Ho.” The EP captures the young rock ’n’ roller’s exuberance and desire to connect, especially as the chorus to “No One Dances” declares, “Nobody dances to rock ’n’ roll anymore. Nothing but scarecrows on the floor.” Catchy riffs like those abound on the second track “Keys,” highlighting Marshek’s dexterity as a songwriter. Later, all the elements seem to align in the EP’s final track “Summatime,” after Marshek—backed by some soaring harmonies—announces “Summertime is here again” before punching out the chords in unison with Copeland’s violent snare pops and adding, “So hit the beach and grab a friend.” Though he’s crafted a high-quality batch of sunny songs that seem destined to earn him a wider audience, Marshek isn’t ready to take a break. He plays weekly with his ’90s alt-rock cover band The Little Dolls and is lending his skills as a drummer to his girlfriend Lacey Selvagn’s project, Dead Bugs. Meanwhile, The Steven Marshek Group plays St. Augustine’s Planet Sarbez with local rockers Gov Club on Friday, May 5. He’s also got a new batch of songs he plans to record this summer. “If I’m not busy, I go crazy,” Marshek says, laughing. “It’s good, though. I think you should have to sweat for things that you love.” Matthew B. Shaw mail@folioweekly.com

Indiana-born jam-band vets UMPHREY’S McGEE, whose lightshows deliver some intense visuals, bro, perform with BIG SOMETHING April 29 at St. Augustine Amphitheatre.

LIVE + LOCAL MUSIC CONCERTS THIS WEEK

NATHANIEL RATELIFF & the NIGHT SWEATS, SERATONES 7 p.m. April 26, St. Augustine Amphitheatre, 1340 A1A S., 209-0367, $32.50-$39.50. SPADE McQUADE 6 p.m. April 26, Fionn MacCool’s Irish Pub, Jacksonville Landing, Ste. 176, 374-1247. MARSHA AMBROSIUS, ERIC BENÉT 8 p.m. April 26, The Florida Theatre, 128 E. Forsyth St., Downtown, 355-2787, $35-$75. The FIREWATER TENT REVIVAL 10 p.m. April 26, Fly’s Tie Irish Pub, 177 Sailfish Dr. E., Atlantic Beach, 246-4293. UPON a BURNING BODY, WITHIN the RUINS, KUBLAI KHAN, COLDCASKET 6 p.m. April 27, 1904 Music Hall, 19 Ocean St., Downtown, $16 advance; $20 day of. TRACE ADKINS 8 p.m. April 27, Thrasher-Horne Center for the Arts, 283 College Dr., Orange Park, 276-6750, $43-$213. 3 the BAND 9 p.m. April 27, Flying Iguana Taqueria & Tequila Bar, 207 Atlantic Blvd., Neptune Beach, 853-5680. POISON RITES, DAGGER BEACH, RIP JUNIOR 9 p.m. April 27, Rain Dogs, 1045 Park St., Riverside, 379-4969, $5. The DELUSIONAIRES, BAD SPELL, KENNY & the JETS 9 p.m. April 27, Planet Sarbez, 115 Anastasia Blvd., St. Augustine, 342-0632. MIKE McCARTHY TRIO, ISAAC CORBITT 7 p.m. April 28, River City Brewing Company, 835 Museum Cir., Southbank, 398-2299. The BAND RIVER 8 p.m. April 28, Jack Rabbits, 1528 Hendricks Ave., San Marco, 398-7496, $10. HEART SHAPED BOX (Nirvana Tribute), ASKMEIFICARE, DJ WIZARD WAND 8 p.m. April 28, Rain Dogs. TALA 10 p.m. April 28, Hoptinger Bier Garden & Sausage House, 1037 Park St., Riverside, 903-4112. EVAN MICHAEL & the WELL WISHERS 10 p.m. April 28 & 29, Flying Iguana. Welcome to Rockville: SOUNDGARDEN, DEF LEPPARD, A PERFECT CIRCLE, The OFFSPRING, MASTODON, CHEVELLE, SEETHER, PAPA ROACH, THREE DAYS GRACE, SUM 41, PIERCE the VEIL, COHEED & CAMBRIA, ALTER BRIDGE, The PRETTY RECKLESS, AMON AMARTH, EAGLES of DEATH METAL, HIGHLY SUSPECT, DILLINGER ESCAPE PLAN, IN FLAMES, GOJIRA, IN THIS MOMENT, MOTIONLESS in WHITE, ALL THAT REMAINS, NOTHING MORE, RIVAL SONS, BEARTOOTH, EVERY TIME I DIE, ATTILA, STARSET, DINOSAUR PILE-UP, I PREVAIL, KYNG, CROBOT, VOLUMES, SYLAR, FIRE from the GODS, AS LIONS, BADFLOWER, GOODBYE JUNE, FRANK CARTER & the RATTLESNAKES, COVER YOUR TRACKS, The CHARM The FURY April 29 & 30, Metropolitan Park, 1410 Gator Bowl Blvd., Downtown, $119.50-$270, welcometorockvillefestival.com. UMPHREY’S McGEE, BIG SOMETHING 6 p.m. April 29, St. Augustine Amphitheatre, $35. CAIN’T NEVER COULD 7 p.m. April 29, River City Brewing Company, 835 Museum Cir., Southbank, 398-2299. SIDEREAL ALBUM RELEASE, N.W. IZZARD, LET’S RIDE 8 p.m. April 29, 1904 Music Hall, $12 advance; $15 day of. WRONG WAY (Sublime Tribute), BIGFOOT BAREFOOT 8 p.m. April 29, Jack Rabbits, $8. LUCIDEA, DAVE McSWEENEY 9:30 p.m. April 29, Surfer the Bar, 200 N. First Street, Jax Beach, 372-9756. EMMET CAHILL 4 p.m. April 30, Culhane’s Irish Pub, 967 Atlantic Blvd., Atlantic Beach, 249-9595, $30; $45 VIP.

DONNY BRAZILE 6 p.m. April 30, Music in the Box, Limelight Theatre, 11 Old Mission Ave., St. Augustine, 825-1164, $5. HOLLOWPOINT MILITIA, KSICK, HELLO MY NAME IS 8 p.m. May 1, 1904 Music Hall, $10 advance; $12 day of. IT LIES WITHIN, TO SPEAK of WOLVES, BLESSING OF a CURSE, JUST LIKE GENTLEMEN, BORN in JUNE, REACH for the SKY, AXIOM 7 p.m. May 1, Jack Rabbits, $10 advance; $12 day of. EVERCLEAR, The DOG APOLLO, SKYVIEW 7 p.m. May 2, Mavericks Live, 2 Independent Dr., Downtown, 356-1110, $25; $150 VIP. Suwannee River Jam: BILLY CURRINGTON, RANDY HOUSER, HUNTER HAYES, MONTGOMERY GENTRY, JERROD NIEMANN, SAMMY KERSHAW, AARON TIPPEN, COLLIN RAYE, SARA EVANS, NEAL McCOY May 3-6, Spirit of the Suwannee Music Park, 3076 95th Dr., Live Oak, 386-364-1683, $90 weekend; $75 students/military, $45 children; $200-$400 VIP; tix and full schedule at musicliveshere.com. CHRISTOPHER CROSS 8 p.m. May 3, Ponte Vedra Concert Hall, 1050 A1A N., 209-0399, $63-$93.

UPCOMING CONCERTS

WEEZER, The PAUSES May 4, St. Augustine Amphitheatre WHETHERMAN CD RELEASE May 5, Mudville Music Room THE WHISKEY GENTRY, EULA MAE May 5, Jack Rabbits STEVE WINWOOD May 5, St. Augustine Amphitheatre ERIC CHURCH May 5, Veterans Memorial Arena TECH N9NE, BROTHA LYNCH, KRIZZ KALIKO May 6, Mavericks Live TRAVIS SCOTT May 6, St. Augustine Amphitheatre SARAH SHOOK & THE DISARMERS, CHRIS COLLARD & THE GREENS May 6, Jack Rabbits HAROLD LÓPEZ-NUSSA May 7, The Ritz Theatre BASTILLE May 7, St. Augustine Amphitheatre AMBROSIA May 8, Alhambra Theatre & Dining JD EICHER, STEVE EVERETT, JACKSON PHILLIP May 9, Jack Rabbits TEMPLES May 10, Jack Rabbits CITIZEN COPE May 11, P.V. Concert Hall X May 11, St. Augustine Amphitheatre Funk Fest: CHARLIE WILSON, FANTASIA, BELL BIV DEVOE, JOE, GUY, TEDDY RILEY, SWV, EN VOGUE, YING YANG TWINS May 12 & 13, Metropolitan Park VICTOR WOOTEN TRIO May 12, P.V. Concert Hall JOHN LEGEND, GALLANT May 14, St. Augustine Amphitheatre LEWIS DEL MAR, ANNA WISE May 14, Jack Rabbits EMMETT O’HANLON May 15, Culhane’s CATFISH & THE BOTTLEMEN, JULY TALK May 17, Jack Rabbits THE HEAD AND THE HEART May 17, Florida Theatre UNKNOWN HINSON, WAYNE THE TRAIN HANCOCK May 18, Jack Rabbits THE PURPLE PARTY, DJ OB-1 BENOBI, DJ NICKFRESH, THE IMPRINCENATOR May 20, Jack Rabbits SAY ANYTHING, BAYSIDE, HOT ROD CIRCUIT May 23, Mavericks Live MAYDAY PARADE, KNUCKLE PUCK, MILESTONES May 24, Mavericks Live ASLEEP at the WHEEL May 25, P.V. Concert Hall IDINA MENZEL May 26, St. Augustine Amphitheatre

BRIT FLOYD May 26, Florida Theatre Daily’s Place Opening: TEDESCHI TRUCKS BAND May 27, Downtown THE MARVEL YEARS, DAILY BREAD, CAT PARTY, EBRO May 27, Jack Rabbits BEACH HOUSE May 28, P.V. Concert Hall TRAIN May 28, Daily’s Place The GRANT PAXTON BAND May 28, Music in the Box, Limelight Theatre SONDERBLUE, GEEXELLA, LE ORCHID May 30, Jack Rabbits DAVE MATTHEWS & TIM REYNOLDS May 30, Daily’s Place FUTURE ISLANDS, ZACK MEXICO June 2, P.V. Concert Hall DEICIDE, DEAD CENTRE, CRYPTERIA June 4, Jack Rabbits FROGGY FRESH June 6, Jack Rabbits MURDER JUNKIES, GROSS EVOLUTION, DEATHWATCH ’97 June 8, Rain Dogs ZOSO (The Ultimate Led Zeppelin Experience) June 8, P.V. Concert Hall A-Train Live: PETE LEE June 9, Ritz Theatre DIRTY HEADS, SOJA, The GREEN June 10, St. Augustine Amphitheatre T.I. June 11, Mavericks Live Happy Together Tour: FLO & EDDIE (The Turtles), CHUCK NEGRON, The ASSOCIATION, The BOX TOPS, The COWSILLS, RON DANTE June 11, Florida Theatre THIRD EYE BLIND, SILVERSUN PICKUPS June 11, Daily’s Place KEVIN GARRETT June 13, Jack Rabbits The GIPSY KINGS June 15, St. Augustine Amphitheatre TIG NOTARO June 15, P.V. Concert Hall DAVE MASON June 16, P.V. Concert Hall SHOTGUN SHANE, AROUND THE BONFIRE, BIG MURPH June 17, Jack Rabbits SLIGHTLY STOOPID, IRATION, J BOOG, The MOVEMENT June 22, St. Augustine Amphitheatre Sad Clowns & Hillbillies: JOHN MELLENCAMP, EMMYLOU HARRIS, CARLENE CARTER, LILY & MADELEINE June 24, St. Augustine Amphitheatre DEFTONES, RISE AGAINST June 24, Daily’s Place ALLIE KELLY, ELLA ROMAINE June 25, Music in the Box, Limelight Theatre PAUL BYROM June 25, Culhane’s VESPERTEEN, DBMK, FAZE WAVE June 26, Jack Rabbits ALEJANDRO ESCOVEDO & the BURN SOMETHING BEAUTIFUL BAND June 27, P.V. Concert Hall MISS D & HER DANCING DOLLS June 30, Florida Theatre CHICAGO, The BAND, The DOOBIE BROTHERS July 1, Daily’s Place COREY SMITH July 1, Mavericks Live BECOMING HUMAN July 2, Jack Rabbits DIERKS BENTLEY, COLE SWINDELL, JON PARDI July 13, Daily’s Place PURE PRAIRIE LEAGUE, FIREFALL, ORLEANS July 14, Florida Theatre STYX, REO SPEEDWAGON, DON FELDER July 20, Daily’s Place SLAYER, LAMB of GOD, BEHEMOTH July 21, St. Augustine Amphitheatre TAKING BACK SUNDAY, MODERN CHEMISTRY July 22, Jack Rabbits JASON ISBELL & The 400 UNIT, STRAND of OAKS July 22, St. Augustine Amphitheatre

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LIVE + LOCAL MUSIC LADY ANTEBELLUM, KELSEA BALLERINI, BRETT YOUNG July 27, Daily’s Place REBELUTION, NAKHO, MEDICINE for the PEOPLE, COLLIE BUDZ, HIRIE, DJ MACKLE July 30, St. Augustine Amphitheatre BRITTANI MUELLER July 30, Music in the Box, Limelight Theatre 311, NEW POLITICS, PASSAFIRE Aug. 2, St. Aug. Amphitheatre CIRQUE DU SOLEIL’S OVO Aug. 2-6, Veterans Memorial Arena POSTMODERN JUKEBOX, STRAIGHT NO CHASER Aug. 2, Daily’s Place FOREIGNER, CHEAP TRICK, JASON BONHAM’S LED ZEPPELIN EXPERIENCE Aug. 3, Daily’s Place NEW MANTRA, THETWOTAKES Aug. 8, Jack Rabbits The AUSTRALIAN PINK FLOYD SHOW Aug. 9, Florida Theatre JASON ALDEAN, CHRIS YOUNG, KANE BROWN, DEEJAY SILVER Aug. 17, Veterans Memorial Arena SPOON Aug. 20, Mavericks Live LEE HUNTER, JOEY KERR Aug. 27, Music in the Box, Limelight Theatre GOO GOO DOLLS, PHILLIP PHILLIPS Sept. 2, Daily’s Place MARSHALL TUCKER BAND Sept. 14, Florida Theatre TIM McGRAW & FAITH HILL Sept. 16, Veterans Memorial Arena ZAC BROWN BAND Sept. 21, Daily’s Place ANCIENT CITY SLICKERS Sept. 24, Music in the Box, Limelight Theatre BRIAN REGAN Sept. 24, Florida Theatre JUDAH & THE LION Oct. 10, Mavericks Live The Smooth Tour: FLORIDA GEORGIA LINE, NELLY, CHRIS LANE Oct. 12, Veterans Memorial Arena Once a Month Punk: SCATTER BRAINS, LOOSE BEARINGS Oct. 19, Blue Water Daiquiri & Oyster Bar SPOON Oct. 21, Mavericks Live MICHAEL LAGASSE & FRIENDS Oct. 29, Music in the Box, Limelight Theatre JETHRO TULL Nov. 7, Daily’s Place JOHN McLAUGHLIN, JIMMY HERRING (play Mahavisnu Orchestra) Nov. 24, Florida Theatre KANSAS Dec. 2, Florida Theatre JIM GAFFIGAN Dec. 30, Veterans Memorial Arena GEORGE WINSTON Feb. 23, P.V. Concert Hall

LIVE MUSIC CLUBS

AMELIA ISLAND + FERNANDINA ALLEY CAT BEER HOUSE, 316 Centre St., 491-1001 Amy Basse every Fri. Dan Voll 6:30 p.m. every Wed. John Springer every Thur. & Sat. HAMMERHEADS, 2045 S. Fletcher Ave., 491-7783 Live music most weekends LA MANCHA, 2709 Sadler Rd., 261-4646 Miguel Paley 5:30-9 p.m. every Fri.-Sun. Javier Parez every Sun.

‘90s alt-rock faves EVERCLEAR perform with THE DOG APOLLO May 2 at Mavericks Live, Downtown. SLIDERS SEASIDE GRILL, 1998 S. Fletcher Ave., 277-6652 Pili Pili 6 p.m. April 26. Tad Jennings 6 p.m. April 27. 2 Dudes from Texas, Milltown Road April 28. Alexandra, Davis Turner, Michael Hewlitt April 29. Chase Foraker, JC & Mike April 30. Brian Ernst May 1. Mark O’Quinn May 2 SURF RESTAURANT, 3199 S. Fletcher Ave., 261-5711 Katfish Lee 1 p.m. April 26. Katfish Lee 1 p.m., Bush Doctors 6 p.m. April 27. Sam McDonald 2 p.m. April 28. San Voll, Shell, Whiskey Heart April 29. Jimmy Beat 4:30 p.m. April 30. Jacob Dylan Taylor May 1. Alexandra May 2

AVONDALE + ORTEGA

CASBAH CAFÉ, 3628 St. Johns Ave., 981-9966 Goliath Flores every Wed. Jazz every Sun. Live music every Mon. ECLIPSE, 4219 St. Johns Ave. KJ Free 9 p.m. every Tue. & Thur. Indie dance 9 p.m. every Wed. ’80s & ’90s dance every Fri. MELLOW MUSHROOM, 3611 St. Johns Ave., 388-0200 Live music every Thur.-Sat.

THE BEACHES (All venues are in Jax Beach unless otherwise noted)

BLUE TYPHOON, 2309 Beach Blvd., 379-3789 Live music most weekends

BRASS ANCHOR PUB, 2292 Mayport Rd., Atlantic Beach, 249-0301 Joe Oliff 8 p.m. April 26. Randy Bluesdog Cash Band 9 p.m. April 28. Live music on weekends CASA MARINA HOTEL, 691 First St. N., 270-0025 The Chris Thomas Band April 26 CULHANE’S IRISH PUB, 967 Atlantic Blvd., AB, 249-9595 Emmet Cahill 4 p.m. April 30. DJ Heather every Wed. DJ Jerry every Thur. DJ Hal every Fri. & Sat. Michael Funge 6:30 p.m. every Sun. FLYING IGUANA TAQUERIA & TEQUILA BAR, 207 Atlantic Blvd., NB, 853-5680 3 the Band 9 p.m. April 27. Evan Michael & The Well Wishers 10 p.m. April 28 & 29. Darren Corlew April 30 FLY’S TIE IRISH PUB, 177 Sailfish Dr. E., AB, 246-4293 The Firewater Tent Revival 10 p.m. April 26 GUSTO, 1266 Beach Blvd., 372-9925 Groov 7:30 p.m. every Wed. Murray Goff Fri. Under the Bus every Sat. Gene Nordan 6 p.m. every Sun. HARBOR TAVERN, 160 Mayport Rd., AB, 246-2555 Live music every weekend LYNCH’S IRISH PUB, 514 First St. N., 249-5181 The Good Bad Kids 10 p.m. April 28. Jonnie Morgan Band 10 p.m. April 29. Dirty Pete 10 p.m. every Wed. Split Tone every Thur. Chillula every Sun. Be Easy every Mon. MELLOW MUSHROOM, 1018 Third St. N., 241-5600 Lunar Coast 9 p.m. April 27. Trickshot April 28. Anton LaPlume April 29 MEZZA Restaurant & Bar, 110 First St., NB, 249-5573 Gypsies Ginger every Wed. Mike Shackelford, Steve Shanholtzer every Thur. Mezza Shuffle every Mon. Trevor Tanner every Tue. MONKEY’S UNCLE TAVERN, 1728 N. Third St., 246-1070 Live music every weekend OCEAN 60, 60 Ocean Blvd., Atlantic Beach, 247-0060 Taylor Roberts 7 p.m. April 26 RAGTIME TAVERN, 207 Atlantic Blvd., AB, 241-7877 Live music every Wed.-Sun. SEACHASERS, 831 First St. N., 372-0444 Cowboy Rolex 8 p.m. every Thur. SOUTHERN GROUNDS & CO., 200 First St., NB, 249-2922 Live music every weekend. Jazz Corner 6 p.m. every Tue. SURFER THE BAR, 200 First St. N., 372-9756 Lucidea, Dave McSweeney 9:30 p.m. April 29. Live music most weekends WHISKEY JAX, 950 Marsh Landing Pkwy., 853-5973 Break Evn Band 9:30 p.m. April 28. Chris Thomas Band 9:30 p.m. April 29. Murray Goff 6 p.m. every Mon. Blues Club every Tue. ZETA BREWING, 131 First Ave. N., 372-0727 Live music every Thur.-Sat.

CAMDEN COUNTY, GA.

CAPTAIN STAN’S Smokehouse, 700 Bedell Dr., Woodbine, 912-729-9552 Yoko Says No 6:30 p.m. April 28 & 29. Acoustic music 6:30 p.m. every Sat. J’S TAVERN, 711 Osborne St., St. Marys, 912-882-5280 The Bluff Five Band 8:30 p.m. May 5. Live music most weekends

DOWNTOWN

20 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | APRIL 26-MAY 2, 2017

1904 MUSIC HALL, 19 Ocean St. N. Upon A Burning Body, Within The Ruins, Kublai Khan, Coldcasket 6 p.m. April 27. Sidereal Album Release, N.W. Izzard, Let’s Ride 8 p.m. April 29. Hollowpoint Militia, Ksick, Hello My Name Is 8 p.m. May 1 DE REAL TING, 128 W. Adams St., 633-9738 Ras AJ, De Lions of Jah 7 p.m. April 28 DOS GATOS, 123 E. Forsyth St., 354-0666 DJ Brandon every Thur. DJ NickFresh every Sat. DJ Randall every Mon. DJ Hollywood every Tue. FIONN MacCOOL’S, Jacksonville Landing, 374-1247 Spade McQuade 6 p.m. April 26. Live music most weekends HOURGLASS PUB, 345 E. Bay St., 469-1719 Factory Goth every Sat. Open mic every Sun. Mal Jones every Mon. Drum & Bass every Tue. INTUITION ALE WORKS, 720 King St., 683-7720 Live music 6 p.m. every Thur. JACKSONVILLE LANDING, 2 Independent Dr., 353-1188 Brady Clampitt, Drew Baldridge, Lauren Alaina April 28. 418 Band April 30 MARK’S DOWNTOWN, 315 E. Bay St., 355-5099 DJ Shotgun 10 p.m. every Sat.

LIVE + LOCAL MUSIC MAVERICKS LIVE, Jax Landing, 356-1110 Everclear, The Dog Apollo 7 p.m. May 2. Joe Buck, DJ Justin every Thur.-Sat. MYTH NIGHTCLUB, 333 E. Bay St., 707-0474 $mugglr 9 p.m. April 28. DJ Three 9 p.m. April 29. DJ Law, Artik, Killoala, D2tay every Wed. THE VOLSTEAD, 115 W. Adams St., 414-3171 Swing Dance Sundays 7 p.m.

FLEMING ISLAND

BOONDOCKS GRILL & BAR, 2808 Henley Rd., Green Cove, 406-9497 Darrell Rae 6 p.m. April 26. Alex Affronti 6 p.m. April 27. Mikey Clams 6 p.m., Mr. Natural 9 p.m. April 28. Darrell Rae, Fond Kiser April 29. Redfish Rich April 30. Mark Evans May 2. Ivan Pulley May 3 MELLOW MUSHROOM, 1800 Town Ctr. Blvd., 541-1999 Robert Brown Jr. The Confluent April 27. Al Torchia 8:30 p.m. April 28 WHITEY’S FISH CAMP, 2032 C.R. 220, 269-4198 Don’t Call Me Shirley 9 p.m. April 28. Conch Fritters 5 p.m., Spanky 9 p.m. April 29. Savannah Leigh Bassett 3 p.m. April 30. Live music every Thur.-Sun.

INTRACOASTAL

CLIFF’S Bar & Grill, 3033 Monument Rd., Ste. 2, 645-5162 Back in Time Band April 26 & 27. 13th annual golf fundraiser April 30; proceeds benefit Special Olympics Florida. Live music every weekend. Open mic every Tue. JERRY’S Sports Bar & Grille, 13170 Atlantic, 220-6766 Spectra 7:30 p.m. April 28. Rick Arcusa 7:30 p.m. April 29

MANDARIN

ENZA’S, 10601 San Jose Blvd., Ste. 109, 268-4458 Brian Iannucci April 26 & 30 TAPS BAR & GRILL, 2220 C.R. 210, St. Johns, 819-1554 Chuck Nash April 29. Live music every weekend

ORANGE PARK + MIDDLEBURG DEE’S MUSIC BAR, 2141 Loch Rane Blvd., Ste. 140, 375-2240 Live music every weekend THE HILLTOP, 2030 Wells Rd., 272-5959 John Michael on the piano every Tue.-Sat. THE ROADHOUSE, 231 Blanding Blvd., 264-0611 DJ Big Mike April 27. Comfort Zone 8 p.m. April 29. Live music every weekend SHARK CLUB, 714 Park Ave., 215-1557 Digital Skyline 9 p.m. April 26. Tom Bennett Band 9 p.m. April 27

PONTE VEDRA

PUSSER’S GRILLE, 816 A1A, 280-7766 Billy Buchanan 6 p.m. April 29. Live music Fri. & Sat. TABLE 1, 330 A1A, 280-5515 Barrett Jockers 7:30 p.m. April 27. Latin All Stars 7:30 p.m. April 29. Live music Wed.-Sun.

RIVERSIDE + WESTSIDE

ACROSS THE STREET, 948 Edgewood Ave. S., 683-4182 cc April p 27. Livee music us c most ost weekends ee e ds Bill Ricci

Contemporary Irish musician (and member of Celtic Thunder, yo) EMMET CAHILL performs April 30 at Culhane’s Irish Pub, Atlantic Beach.

BRIXX, 220 Riverside Ave., 300-3928 Live music every Thur. & Fri. HOBNOB, 220 Riverside Ave., Ste. 10, 513-4272 Live music every Fri. HOPTINGER BIER GARDEN & SAUSAGE HOUSE, 1037 Park St., 903-4112 Tala 10 p.m. April 28 MOCKSHOP MUSIC EXCHANGE, 933 Edgewood Ave. S., 647-4415 Boytoy, Brother Cephus, The Mother Gooses 7 p.m. April 27 MURRAY HILL Theatre, 932 Edgewood Ave., 388-7807 TJ the Saucekid birthday bash 2 p.m. April 29. Trap Theology Tour: Young Noah, Plain James, Wrekless Abandon 6:30 p.m. April 30 NIGHTHAWKS, 2952 Roosevelt Blvd. The Young Step 8 p.m. April 26. Traded Youth, We Be United April 28. RAIN DOGS, 1045 Park St., 379-4969 Poison Rites, Dagger Beach, Rip Junior 9 p.m. April 27. Heart Shaped Box (Nirvana Tribute), Askmeificare, DJ Wizard Wand 8 p.m. April 28. RIVERSIDE ARTS MARKET, 715 Riverside Ave., 389-2449 Ballet Arts Centre, FSCJ Danceworks, Unforced Rhythms Dance, Scott Jones Dancers, LaVilla SOA Dance April 29 TOM & BETTY’S, 4409 Roosevelt Blvd., 387-3311 Shayne Rammler 8 p.m. April 26

ST. AUGUSTINE

CELLAR UPSTAIRS, 157 King St., 826-1594 Caleb Joye April 27. T.J. Brown, The Committee April 28. Vinny Jacobs 2 p.m., The Committee 7 p.m. April 29. Vinny Jacobs 2 p.m. April 30 DOS COFFEE & WINE, 300 San Marco Ave., 342-2421 Live music every weekend MARDI GRAS, 123 San Marco Ave., 823-8806 Saulty Daug 9 p.m. April 28. Amy Vickery Trio April 29. Fre Gordon, acoustic open mic 7 p.m. every Sun. Justin Gurnsey, Musicians Exchange 8 p.m. every Mon. PLANET SARBEZ, 115 Anastasia Blvd., 342-0632 The Delusionaires, Bad Spell, Kenny & The Jets 9 p.m. April 27. The Band River 8 p.m. April 28. Valore, Cunabear 9 p.m. May 1 SHANGHAI NOBBY’S, 10 Anastasia Blvd., 547-2188 Live music most weekends TEMPO, 16 Cathedral Pl., 342-0286 Jazzy Blue April 27 & 29. House Cats 9 p.m. April 28. Jazzy Blue, Kevon Re Monte April 29. Jax English Salsa Band 6 p.m. April 30. Open mic 7:30 p.m. every Wed. TRADEWINDS LOUNGE, 124 Charlotte St., 829-9336 Cottonmouth 9 p.m. April 28 & 29. The Down Low every Wed. JP Driver every Thur. Elizabeth Roth every Sat. Those Guys every Tue.

SAN MARCO

JACK RABBITS, 1528 Hendricks Ave., 398-7496 The Band River 8 p.m. April 28. Sublime tribute band Wrong Way 8 p.m. April 29. It Lies Within, To Speak Of Wolves, Blessing of a Curse, Just Like Gentlemen, Born in June, Reach for the Sky, Axiom 7 p.m. May 1 MUDVILLE MUSIC ROOM, 3104 Atlantic Blvd., 352-7008 Whetherman CD release 7 p.m. May 5. RIVER CITY BREWING COMPANY, 835 Museum Cir., 398-2299 Mike McCarthy Trio, Isaac Corbitt 7 p.m. April 28. Cain’t Never Could 7 p.m. April 29

SOUTHSIDE + BAYMEADOWS

CORNER BISTRO & WINE BAR, 9823 Tapestry Park Circle, 619-1931 Matthew Hall 8 p.m. every Thur.-Sat. GREEK STREET Café, 3546 St. Johns Bluff Rd. S., 503-0620 Tavernalive 6 p.m. every Mon. MELLOW MUSHROOM, 9734 Deer Lake Ct., 997-1955 Ken & Kelley Maroney April 27. Kristen Lee April 28. Ouija Brothers April 29 WHISKEY JAX, 10915 Baymeadows Rd., 634-7208 Cassidy Lee 8 p.m. April 26. Party Cartel 9:30 p.m. April 28. Monkey Wrench 9:30 p.m. April 29. Melissa Smith open mic every Thur. Blues jam every Sun. Acoustic with Cassidy Lee every Wed.

SPRINGFIELD + NORTHSIDE

BOSTON’S, 13070 City Station Dr., 751-7499 Live music every weekend CROOKED ROOSTER BREWERY, 148 S. Sixth St., Macclenny, 653-2337 Open mic 7 p.m. every Wed. DICK’S WINGS, 12400 Yellow Bluff Rd., Ste. 101, 619-9828 Celebration of Life for Banner Thomas, 1-4 p.m. April 30 FLIGHT 747 LOUNGE, 1500 Airport Rd., 741-4331 Jake Slater, Ivan Pulley, Chris Tyler, Lift, Jay Garrett, Back in Time, Hijacking Honey 2 p.m.-2 a.m. April 29, benefit for The Florida School for the Deaf & the Blind MELLOW MUSHROOM, 15170 Max Leggett Pkwy., 757-8843 Live music most every weekend SANDOLLAR, 9716 Heckscher Dr., 251-2449 Live music every Fri.-Sun. SHANTYTOWN PUB, 22 W. Sixth St., 798-8222 Live music every weekend

_________________________________________ To list your band’s gig, please send time, date, location (street address, city), admission price, and a contact number to print to Daniel A. Brown, email dbrown@folioweekly. com or by the U.S. Postal Service, 45 W. Bay St., Ste. 103, Jacksonville FL 32202. Events run on a space-available basis. Deadline is at noon every Wednesday for the next Wednesday’s publication.

APRIL 26-MAY 2, 2017 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | 21

FOLIO DINING SPLIFF’S GASTROPUB in Downtown offers eclectic urban fare ranging from fresh veggie delights to gourmet grilled cheese sandwiches.

photo by Ellyn McDonald

AMELIA ISLAND + FERNANDINA BEACH

29 SOUTH EATS, 29 S. Third St., 277-7919, 29southrestaurant.com. Historic downtown bistro’s Chef Scotty Schwartz serves traditional regional cuisine with a modern twist. $$ L Tu-Sa; D M.-Sa; R Sa THE AMELIA TAVERN, 318 Centre St., 310-6088, theameliatavern.com. Contemporary hand-crafted, locally sourced comfort fare: local shrimp, small/big plates, organic greens, sandwiches. $$ FB TO D M; L & D Tu-Sa; Brunch Su. BRETT’S WATERWAY CAFÉ, 1 S. Front St., 261-2660. F On the water at Centre Street’s end. Southern hospitality, upscale atmosphere; daily specials, fresh local seafood, aged beef. $$$ FB L D Daily CAFÉ KARIBO, 27 N. Third St., 277-5269, cafekaribo. com. F In historic building, family-owned café has worldly fare, made-from-scratch dressings, sauces, desserts, sourcing fresh greens, veggies, seafood. Dine in or al fresco under oak-shaded patio. Microbrew Karibrew Pub has beer brewed onsite, imports. $$ FB K TO R, Su; L Daily, D Tu-Su in season THE CRAB TRAP, 31 N. Second St., 261-4749, ameliacrabtrap.com. F Nearly 40 years, family-ownedand-operated. Fresh local seafood, steaks, specials. HH. $$ FB L D Daily JACK & DIANE’S, 708 Centre St., 321-1444, jackanddianescafe.com. F Renovated 1887 shotgun house. Faves: jambalaya, French toast, pancakes, mac & cheese, crêpes. Vegan items. Inside or porch overlooking historic area. $$ BW K TO B L D Daily LA MANCHA, 2709 Sadler Rd., 261-4646. Spanish, Portuguese fare, Brazilian flair. Tapas, seafood, steaks, sangria. Drink specials. AYCE paella Sun. $$$ FB K TO D Nightly LARRY’S GIANT SUBS, 474272 S.R. 200, 844-2225. F SEE ORANGE PARK. MOON RIVER PIZZA, 925 S. 14th St., 321-3400, moonriverpizza.net. F 2016 Best of Jax Winner. Authentic Northern-style pizzas, 20+ toppings, pie/slice. Calzones. $ BW TO L D M-Sa THE MUSTARD SEED CAFÉ, 833 Courson Rd., 277-3141, nassaushealthfoods.net. Casual organic eatery, juice

DINING DIRECTORY KEY AVERAGE ENTRÉE COST $ $$

< $10

$$$

10- $20

$$$$

20-$35 > $35

ABBREVIATIONS & SPECIAL NOTES BW = Beer/Wine

L = Lunch

FB = Full Bar

D = Dinner Bite Club = Hosted Free Folio Weekly Bite Club Event F = Folio Weekly Distribution Spot

K = Kids’ Menu TO = Take Out B = Breakfast R = Brunch

To list your restaurant, call your account manager or call or text SAM TAYLOR, Folio Weekly publisher, at 904-860-2465 (email: staylor@folioweekly.com). 22 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | APRIL 26-MAY 2, 2017

bar, in Nassau Health Foods. All-natural organic items, smoothies, juices, herbal teas, coffees, daily specials. $$ K TO B L M-Sa THE PATIO PLACE, 416 Ash St., 410-3717, patioplacebistro.com. Bistro/wine bar/crêperie’s global menu uses crêpes: starters, entrées, shareables, desserts. $$ BW TO B L D Tu-Su POINTE RESTAURANT, 98 S. Fletcher Ave., 277-4851, elizabethpointelodge.com. 2016 Best of Jax Winner. In award-winning inn Elizabeth Pointe Lodge. Seaside dining; in or out. Hot buffet breakfast daily, full lunch menu. Homestyle soups, specialty sandwiches, desserts. $$$ BW K B L D Daily THE SALTY PELICAN BAR & GRILL, 12 N. Front St., 277-3811, thesaltypelicanamelia.com. F 2016 Best of Jax Winner. 2nd-story outdoor bar. T.J. & Al offer local seafood, fish tacos, Mayport shrimp, po’boys, cheese oysters. $$ FB K L D Daily SLIDERS SEASIDE GRILL, 1998 S. Fletcher Ave., 277-6652, slidersseaside.com. F 2016 Best of Jax Winner. Oceanfront. Award-winning handmade crabcakes, fried pickles, fresh seafood. Open-air 2nd floor balcony, playground. $$ FB K L D Daily THE SURF RESTAURANT & BAR, 3199 S. Fletcher Ave., 261-5711, thesurfonline.com. Oceanview dining since 1957, inside or on the deck. Steaks, seafood, burgers, daily food and drink specials; Wing It Wednesdays. $$ FB K TO L D Daily T-RAY’S BURGER STATION, 202 S. Eighth St., 261-6310. F Family-owned-and-operated 18+ years. Blue plate specials, burgers, biscuits & gravy, shrimp. $ BW TO B L M-Sa

ARLINGTON + REGENCY

LARRY’S GIANT SUBS, 1301 Monument Rd., Ste. 5, 724-5802. F SEE ORANGE PARK.

AVONDALE + ORTEGA

HARPOON LOUIE’S, 4070 Herschel St., Ste. 8, 389-5631, harpoonlouies.net. F Locally owned & operated 20+ years. American pub. 1/2-lb. burgers, fish sandwiches, pasta. Local beers, HH. $$ FB K TO L D Daily MOJO NO. 4 URBAN BBQ & WHISKEY BAR, 3572 St. Johns Ave., Ste. 1, 381-6670. 2016 Best of Jax Winner. Pulled pork and Carolina-style barbecue. Delta fried catfish. Avondale’s Mojo has shrimp & grits, specialty cocktails. Local musicians on weekends. $$ FB K TO L D Daily PINEGROVE MARKET & DELI, 1511 PineGrove Ave., 389-8655, pinegrovemarket.com. F 2016 Best of Jax Winner. 40+ years. Burgers, Cubans, subs, wraps. Onsite butcher, USDA choice prime aged beef. Craft beers. Fri. & Sat. fish fry. $ BW TO B L D M-Sa RESTAURANT ORSAY, 3630 Park St., 381-0909, restaurantorsay.com. 2016 Best of Jax Winner. French/ Southern bistro; local organic ingredients. Steak frites, mussels, pork chops. $$$ FB R, Su; D Nightly SIMPLY SARA’S, 2902 Corinthian Ave., 387-1000, simplysaras.net. F Down-home fare from scratch: eggplant fries, pimento cheese, baked chicken, fruit cobblers, chicken & dumplings, desserts. BYOB. $$ K TO L D Tu-Sa, B Sa SOUTH KITCHEN & SPIRITS, 3638 Park St., 475-2362, south.kitchen. Southern classics: crispy catfish w/ smoked gouda grits, family-style fried chicken, burgers, vegetarian, vegan, gluten-free options. $$ FB K TO L D Daily

BAYMEADOWS

AL’S PIZZA, 8060 Philips Hwy., Ste. 105, 731-4300. F 2016 Best of Jax Winner. SEE BEACHES. INDIA’S, 9802 Baymeadows Rd., Ste. 8, 620-0777, indiajaxcom. F 2016 Best of Jax Winner. Authentic cuisine, lunch buffet. Curries, vegetables, lamb, chicken, shrimp, fish tandoori. $$ BW L M-Sa; D Nightly LARRY’S GIANT SUBS, 8616 Baymeadows Rd., 739-2498. F SEE ORANGE PARK. METRO DINER, 9802 Baymeadows Rd., 425-9142. F 2016 Best of Jax Winner. SEE SAN MARCO.

DINING DIRECTORY

BEACHES

(Venues are in Jax Beach unless otherwise noted.) AL’S PIZZA, 303 Atlantic Blvd., Atlantic Beach, 249-0002, alspizza.com. F 2016 Best of Jax Winner. NY-stylegourmet pizzas, baked dishes. 28+ years. All day HH M-Th. $ FB K TO L D Daily ANGIE’S SUBS, 1436 Beach Blvd., 246-2519. ANGIE’S GROM SUBS, 204 Third Ave. S., 241-3663. F Fresh ingredients, 25+ years. Huge salads, blue-ribbon iced tea. Grom has Sun. brunch, no alcohol. $ K BW TO L D Daily BOLD BEAN COFFEE ROASTERS, 2400 S. Third St., Ste. 201, 374-5735. 2016 Best of Jax Winner. SEE RIVERSIDE. BURRITO GALLERY, 300 Beach Blvd., Ste. 1, 246-6521, burritogallery.com. 2016 Best of Jax Winner. Relocated, all grown up. Same great quality burritos, tacos, enchiladas; fast service. Craft cocktails. HH M-F. $ K FB TO L D Daily CRUISERS GRILL, 319 23rd Ave. S., 270-0356, cruisersgrill.com. 2016 Best of Jax Winner. Locally owned & operated 20+ years. Half-pound burgers, fish sandwiches, big salads, award-winning cheddar fries, sangria. $ BW K TO L D Daily DELICOMB DELICATESSEN & ESPRESSO BAR, 102 Sixth Ave. N., 372-4192, delicomb.com. Family-owned-andoperated. Everything’s made with natural and organic ingredients—no hydrogenated oils, high-fructose corn syrup. Granola, tuna salad, kimchi, wraps, spicy panini melts. $ TO B L Tu-Su EUROPEAN STREET CAFÉ, 992 Beach Blvd., 249-3001, europeanstreet.com. F SEE RIVERSIDE. FAMOUS TOASTERY, 311 N. Third St., 372-0712, famoustoastery.com. Corned beef hash, gluten-free pancakes, omelets, toast. Wraps, Bloody Marys, mimosas, peach Bellini. $$ FB K TO B L Daily

GRILL ME!

CAMDEN COUNTY, GEORGIA

Feel the breeze off THE MIDDLE EAST in San Marco

DOWNTOWN

THE BANK BAR B Q & BAKERY, 331 W. Forsyth St., 388-1600, thebankbbq.com. 28 years’ experience means barbecue done right. Onsite bakery has specialty cakes. $ TO L & D M-F BURRITO GALLERY & BAR, 21 E. Adams St., 598-2922. 2016 Best of Jax Winner. Innovative Southwestern fare; ginger teriyaki tofu, beef barbacoa, wraps, tacos. $ BW TO L D M-Sa CASA DORA, 108 E. Forsyth, 356-8282, casadoraitalian. com. F Serving Italian fare, 40+ years: veal, seafood, pizza. Homemade salad dressing. $ BW K L M-F; D M-Sa OLIO MARKET, 301 E. Bay St., 356-7100, oliomarket.com. F Scratch soups, sandwiches. Duck grilled cheese, seen on Best Sandwich in America. $$ BW TO B R L M-F; D F & Sa SPLIFF’S GASTROPUB, 15 N. Ocean St., 844-5000. Music venue has munchie apps, mac & cheese dishes, pockets, gourmet grilled cheese sandwiches, wraps. HH M-F. $ BW L D M-Sa URBAN GRIND COFFEE COMPANY, 45 W. Bay, Ste. 102, 516-7799, urbangrind.coffee. Locally roasted whole bean brewed coffees, espressos, pastries, smoothies, bagels. Chicken/tuna salad, sandwiches. WiFi. $ B L M-F. URBAN GRIND EXPRESS, 50 W. Laura, 516-7799. SEE ABOVE. ZODIAC BAR & GRILL, 120 W. Adams St., 354-8283, thezodiacbarandgrill.com. 16+ years. Mediterranean cuisine, American fare, paninis, vegetarian dishes. Daily lunch buffet. Espressos, hookahs. HH M-F $ FB L M-F; D W-Sa

FLEMING ISLAND

GRASSROOTS Natural Market, 1915 East-West Pkwy., 541-0009. F SEE RIVERSIDE. MOJO SMOKEHOUSE, 1810 Town Center Blvd., Ste. 8, 264-0636. SEE AVONDALE. WHITEY’S FISH CAMP, 2032 C.R. 220, 269-4198, whiteysfishcamp.com. F Real fish camp. Gator tail, freshwater catfish, daily specials, on Swimming Pen Creek. Tiki bar. Come by boat, bike or car. $ FB K TO L Tu-Su; D Nightly

INTRACOASTAL WEST

AL’S PIZZA, 14286 Beach Blvd., Ste. 31, 223-0991. F 2016 Best of Jax Winner. SEE BEACHES.

IAN LYNCH

Bistro AIX

1440 San Marco Blvd. • Jacksonville Born in: Denver, Colorado Years in the Biz: 20 Fave Restaurant: Maple & Ash, Chicago Fave Cuisine Style: Mexican Go-To Ingredients: Garlic confit, butter and herbs Ideal Meal: Spinalis ribeye cap, seasonal vegetable and fries. Every Sunday! Will Not Cross My Lips: Hundred-year egg Insider's Secret: Seasonal ingredients/technique Celeb Sighting at Your Bar: Jessica Simpson Culinary Treat: “Cherry Garcia” ice cream FLYING IGUANA TAQUERIA & TEQUILA BAR, 207 Atlantic Blvd., NB, 853-5680, flyingiguana.com. F Latin American: tacos, seafood, carnitas, Cubana fare. 100+ tequilas. $ FB TO L D Daily GUSTO, 1266 Beach Blvd., 372-9925, gustojax.com. Classic Old World Roman cuisine, large Italian menu: homestyle pasta, beef, chicken, fish delicacies; open pizza-tossing kitchen. Reservations encouraged. $$ FB TO L R D Tu-Su HAWKERS ASIAN STREET FARE, 241 Atlantic Blvd., NB, 425-1025. SEE RIVERSIDE. LARRY’S GIANT SUBS, 657 Third St. N., 247-9620. F SEE ORANGE PARK. METRO DINER, 1534 3rd St. N., 853-6817. F 2016 Best of Jax Winner. SEE SAN MARCO. MOJO KITCHEN BBQ PIT & BLUES BAR, 1500 Beach Blvd., 247-6636. SEE AVONDALE. MSHACK, 299 Atlantic Blvd., AB, 241-2599, shackburgers.com. Burgers, hot dogs, fries, shakes. Dine indoors or out. $$ BW L D Daily NATIVE SUN NATURAL FOODS MARKET & DELI, 1585 Third St. N., 458-1390. 2016 Best of Jax Winner. SEE MANDARIN. RAGTIME TAVERN SEAFOOD & GRILL, 207 Atlantic Blvd., Atlantic Beach, 241-7877, ragtimetavern.com. F 30+ years, iconic seafood place. Blackened snapper, sesame tuna, Ragtime shrimp. Daily HH, brunch Sun. $$ FB L D Daily SALT LIFE FOOD SHACK, 1018 Third St. N., 372-4456, saltlifefoodshack.com. Specialty items, tuna poke bowl, fresh sushi, Ensenada tacos, local fried shrimp. $$ FB K TO L D Daily V PIZZA, 528 First St. N., 853-6633, vpizza.com. Traditional Neapolitana artisan pizza from Naples – Italy, not Florida, made with fresh ingredients. $$ FB TO L D Daily WHISKEY JAX, 950 Marsh Landing Pkwy., 853-5973. SEE BAYMEADOWS.

BITE-SIZED

CAPTAIN STAN’S SMOKEHOUSE, 700 Bedell Dr., Woodbine, 912-729-9552. Barbecue, sides, hot dogs, burgers, desserts. Dine in or out on picnic tables. $$ FB K TO L & D Tu-Sa OUTERBANKS SPORTS BAR & GRILLE, 140 The Lakes Blvd., Ste. H, Kingsland, 912-729-5499. Fresh seafood, burgers, steaks, wings. $$ FB TO D Nightly

pphoto by Brentley Stead ph

NATIVE SUN NATURAL FOODS MARKET & DELI, 11030 Baymeadows Rd., 260-2791. 2016 Best of Jax Winner. SEE MANDARIN. PATTAYA THAI GRILLE, 9551 Baymeadows Rd., Ste. 1, 646-9506, ptgrille.com. Since 1989, the family-owned place has offered an extensive menu of traditional Thai, vegetarian, new-Thai; curries, seafood, noodles, soups. Low-sodium & gluten-free. $$$ BW TO L D Tu-Sa THE WELL WATERING HOLE, 3928 Baymeadows Rd., Ste. 9, 737-7740, thewellwateringhole.com. Local craft beers, glass/bottle wines. Meatloaf sandwich, pulled Peruvian chicken, vegan black bean burgers. $$ BW K TO L M-F; D Tu-Sa WHISKEY JAX, 10915 Baymeadows Rd., Ste. 135, 634-7208, whiskeyjax.com. Gastropub. Craft beers, gourmet burgers, handhelds, signature plates. HH. $$ FB L D F-Su; D Nightly

STILL

POPPIN’

AJEEN AND JUICE OF SAN MARCO (WHERE Pulp used to be) features Middle Eastern street food along with some recognizable favorites from the Pulp menu, like smoothies and acai bowls. All the dishes are placed upon or wrapped with ajeen, a round Levantine dough, like naan or pita bread. The fresh, hot round of bread comes straight to your plate from their custom griddle (it looks like a giant round griddle combined with a Lazy Susan); its sole purpose is to give you the freshest ajeen. If you’re wanting something filling (because smoothies are great, but nothing beats chewing), look at the menu’s two main sections: Manaeesh and The Meaty Ones. All Manaeesh options have a base of ajeen and Za’atar (a traditional Middle Eastern spice mixture). The Meaty Ones column features that same bread rolled up with fragrant, tender meats. From the Manaeesh side, we tried The Original with Egg & Spinach ($6.50), a standard dish of bread with Za’atar seasoning and egg beaten with the spinach, poured over the ajeen and baked. It tastes almost like a frittata on a flatbread. Sfeeha (pronounced s-f-ee-ha) and the Musakhan were easy choices from the Meaty section. The filling in Sfeeha ($7.50) is ground beef with tahini, a sesame paste. The combination of beef and tahini creates a truly savory bite that you don’t want to miss. The Musakhan ($7.50) is a chicken dish wrapped in ajeen with onions and sumac. The slight sweetness of the sumac and onions complements the tender ground chicken. The filling of these two “sandwiches” is gently rolled up into the ajeen—it’s delicious.

BITE-SIZED

AJEEN AND JUICE

1962 San Marco Blvd., San Marco, 396-9222, facebook.com/ajeenandjuice

LARRY’S GIANT SUBS, 10750 Atlantic Blvd., Ste. 14, 642-6980. F SEE ORANGE PARK.

MANDARIN + NW ST. JOHNS

AL’S PIZZA, 11190 San Jose Blvd., 260-4115. F 2016 Best of Jax Winner. SEE BEACHES. ATHENS CAFÉ, 6271 St. Augustine Rd., Ste. 7, 733-1199, athenscafejax.com. 20+ years, serving dolmades (stuffed grape leaves), baby shoes (stuffed eggplant), Greek beers. Vegetarian-friendly. Early bird menu Mon.-Fri. $$ BW L M-F; D Sa CRUISERS GRILL, 5613 San Jose Blvd., 737-2874. 2016 Best of Jax Winner. SEE BEACHES. FIRST COAST DELI & GRILL, 6082 St. Augustine Rd., 733-7477. Pancakes, bacon, sandwiches, burgers, wings. $ K TO B L Daily JAX DINER, 5065 St. Augustine Rd., 739-7070. New spot serves local produce, meats, breads, seafood. $ TO B L Daily METRO DINER, 12807 San Jose Blvd., 638-6185. F 2016 Best of Jax Winner. Dinner nightly. SEE SAN MARCO. MOJO BAR-B-QUE, 1607 University Blvd. W., 732-7200, mojobbq.com. SEE AVONDALE. NATIVE SUN NATURAL FOODS MARKET & DELI, 10000 San Jose Blvd., 260-6950, nativesunjax.com. F 2016 Best of Jax Winner. Organic soups, baked items, sandwiches, prepared foods. Juice, smoothie, coffee bar. All-natural beer/wine. $ BW TO K B L D Daily V PIZZA, 12601 San Jose Blvd., 647-9424. SEE SAN MARCO.

ORANGE PARK

THE HILLTOP, 2030 Wells Rd., 272-5959, hilltop-club. com. Southern fine dining. New Orleans shrimp, certified Black Angus prime rib, she-crab soup, desserts. Extensive bourbon selection. $$$ FB D Tu-Sa LARRY’S GIANT SUBS, 1330 Blanding Blvd., Ste. 165, 276-7370. 1545 C.R. 220, 278-2827. 700 Blanding Blvd.,

For a side to accompany your rollup, choose between two salads: Levantine Salad ($6), comprising field greens, olive oil and spices, or Salata Tahini ($6), which has cucumbers, tomato, mint, garlic, tahini, olive oil and spice. Because I reject nutrient-lacking lettuce at every turn, I went for the chunky and filling Salta Tahini. With halved cherry tomatoes and chopped cucumber, the dish also has a slightly creamy sauce thanks to the tahini. My tastebuds were delighted to discover that the mint really shined through. From The Sweet Ones section, I chose the only thing I couldn’t pronounce—the Qatayef ($5), a dumpling-style dessert and the ice-creamlike Acai bowl. The slightly too-thick dough of the Qatayef is wrapped up like an empanada or hand pie and filled with cheese or pecans. The two dumplings are topped with a delicate orange blossom syrup. The thick frozen Acai bowl comes blended with frozen banana, a milk or juice base of your choice, and one fruit option. I chose strawberries. The whole bowl is finished off with a healthy sprinkle of granola. Out of the two, I’d just go with the Acai bowl; it’s one of the best healthy desserts you’ll ever eat. Brentley Stead biteclub@folioweekly.com APRIL 26-MAY 2, 2017 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | 23

DINING DIRECTORY PINT-SIZED

BEERS ON THE

BLOCK

Highlighting the NEWEST AND UPCOMING SPOTS to quaff craft brews JUST A FEW YEARS AGO, NORTHEAST Florida’s craft beer choices were limited. Since Bold City Brewing Company opened in 2008, though, the area’s come a long way. There are now 19 working microbreweries and one macrobrewery in the region. There are also eight breweries in various stages of completion, which means there could be 28 breweries within 30 miles of Downtown Jacksonville in the near future. With so many new breweries open now or opening soon, I thought a brief report was in order.

NOW OPEN

PINT-SIZED

Southern Swells Brewing Company, 1312 Beach Blvd., Jax Beach This brewery embraces beachiness, proving that laid-back doesn’t mean it’s unrefined. Co-owners Jay Varney and Cory Adams have crafted a welcoming and warm taproom. And, with 20 taps of both their own and select guest brews, there’s sure to be something for everyone. Old Coast Ales, 300 Anastasia Blvd., St. Augustine Co-owners Jon Boisclair and Matt Hooker dreamed of opening a brewery for quite some time. I first heard of them several years ago when they launched a Kickstarter fundraiser. After a few setbacks–thanks, Hurricane Matthew–the friends have finally opened a laid-back taproom, ideal for mingling, offering 10 taps, nine beers and one locally produced kombucha.

COMING SOON

Atlantic Beach Brewing Company, 725 Atlantic Blvd., Stes. 3 & 15, Atlantic Beach; Grand Opening May 6 General contractor Chuck Horn and twin brother Spencer followed their muse (Spencer relocated from Seattle) to open a brewery in Atlantic Beach. Beers will range from hoppy IPAs to tart Berliner Weiss. Hyperion Brewing Company, 1740 N. Main St., Springfield; Grand Opening May 19 Main Street has long been a neglected brew zone. With next month’s opening of Hyperion Brewing Company in the Springfield National Historic District, that’s about to change. Alexandra McKeown and Troy Orton hope to be catalysts for bringing the district back to life. The brewery will operate on a unique concept: 15 constantly rotating taps without a core brand. This lets guests enjoy a new beer every time they visit. Bottlenose Brewing, 9700 Deer Lake Ct., Ste. 1, Southside From the ashes of Tinseltown’s abruptly closed World of Beer, Bottlenose will be the second opened by owner Mark Stillman, whose first foray into brewing is Jax Beach mainstay Green Room Brewing. With 50 taps, the taproom will serve both house-brewed beers and a collection of Florida beers, along with fare from the onsite kitchen. Mark your calendar for Bottlenose’s grand opening, scheduled for Friday, May 26. Marc Wisdom marc@folioweekly.com 24 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | APRIL 26-MAY 2, 2017

photo by Madison Gross

Bold City Brewery, 109 E. Bay St., Downtown The brewery that started it all in the River City is now open Downtown next to the still-under-construction Cowford Chophouse. With an exposed red brick wall, a three-barrel brewhouse, 11 taps and a unique bar, Bold City is making a bold statement. Owner Brian Miller says his plan is to rotate brewers through the new location on a threemonth cycle. The smaller system means brewers can tap into their creative juices and concoct beers that would be difficult or costly to produce at Bold City’s 20-barrel brewhouse in Riverside.

Distinctive barbecue dishes and upscale preparations of soul food favorites have earned MOJO KITCHEN a powerful reputation.

Ste. 15, 272-3553. 5733 Roosevelt, 446-9500. 1401 S. Orange Ave., Green Cove, 284-7789, larryssubs.com. F Larry’s piles ’em high, serves ’em fast; 36+ years. Hot & cold subs, soups. Some Larry’s serve breakfast. $ K TO B L D Daily METRO DINER, 2034 Kingsley Ave., 375-8548. F 2016 Best of Jax Winner. Dinner nightly. SEE SAN MARCO. THE ROADHOUSE, 231 Blanding Blvd., 264-0611, roadhouseonline.net. Sandwiches, wings, burgers, quesadillas for 35+ years. 75+ imported beers. $ FB L D Daily SNACSHACK BAKERY, 179 College Dr., Ste. 19, 322-1414, snacshack.menu. Bakery and café; sandwiches, coffees, bagels, muffins, breads, cookies, brownies, snack treats. $$ TO B BR L M-F SPRING PARK COFFEE, 328 Ferris St., Green Cove Springs, 531-9391, springparkcoffee.com. Cozy shop; fresh-roasted Brass Tacks coffee, handcrafted hot & cold drinks, specialty lattes, cappuccino, macchiato, teas, pastries, sandwiches, breakfast. $ B L D Daily

PONTE VEDRA BEACH

AL’S PIZZA, 635 A1A, 543-1494. F 2016 Best of Jax Winner. SEE BEACHES. LARRY’S GIANT SUBS, 830 A1A N., Ste. 6, 273-3993. F SEE ORANGE PARK. MSHACK NOCATEE, 641 Crosswater Pkwy., 395-3575. SEE BEACHES. METRO DINER, 340 Front St., Ste. 700, 513-8422. F 2016 Best of Jax Winner. SEE SAN MARCO.

RIVERSIDE, 5 PTS + WESTSIDE

13 GYPSIES, 887 Stockton St., 389-0330, 13gypsies.com. 2016 Best of Jax Winner. Authentic Mediterranean cuisine: chorizo, tapas, blackened cod, pork skewers, coconut mango curry chicken. Breads from scratch. $$ BW L D Tu-Sa, R Sa AL’S PIZZA, 1620 Margaret St., Ste. 201, 388-8384. F 2016 Best of Jax Winner. SEE BEACHES. BLACK SHEEP, 1534 Oak St., 355-3793, blacksheep5points.com. 2016 Best of Jax Winner. New American, Southern; local source ingredients. Specials, rooftop bar. HH. $$$ FB R Sa & Su; L M-F; D Nightly BOLD BEAN COFFEE ROASTERS, 869 Stockton St., Ste. 1, 855-1181, boldbeancoffee.com. 2016 Best of Jax Winner. Small-batch, artisanal approach to sourcing and roasting single-origin, direct-trade coffees. Signature blends, handcrafted syrups, espressos, craft beers. $ BW TO B L Daily BRIXX WOOD FIRED PIZZA, 220 Riverside Ave., 300-3928, brixxpizza.com. Pizzas, pastas, soups. Glutenfree options. Daily specials, BOGO pizzas 10 p.m.-close. $$ FB K TO L D Daily CORNER TACO, 818 Post St., 240-0412, cornertaco.com. Made-from-scratch “Mexclectic street food,” tacos, nachos, gluten-free, vegetarian options. $ BW L D Tu-Su CUMMER CAFÉ, Cummer Museum of Art & Gardens, 829 Riverside Ave., 356-6857, cummer.org. 2016 Best of Jax Winner. Light lunch, quick bites, locally roasted coffee, espresso-based beverages, sandwiches, gourmet desserts, daily specials. Dine in or in gardens. $ BW K L D Tu; L W-Su EUROPEAN STREET CAFÉ, 2753 Park St., 384-9999. 130+ import beers, 20 on tap. Sandwiches. Dine outside at some EStreets. $ BW K L D Daily FIVE POINTS TAVERN, 1521 Margaret St., 549-5063, fivepointstavern.com. New American cosmopolitan place serves chef-curated dishes in a relaxed environment. $$ FB TO L & D Tu-Su GRASSROOTS NATURAL MARKET, 2007 Park St., 384-4474, thegrassrootsmarket.com. F Juice bar uses certified organic fruits, veggies. Artisanal cheeses, 300 craft,

import beers, 50 organic wines, produce, meats, vitamins, herbs, wraps, sides, sandwiches. $ BW TO B L D Daily HAWKERS ASIAN STREET FARE, 1001 Park St., 508-0342, hawkerstreetfare.com. 2016 Best of Jax Winner. Authentic dishes from mobile stalls: BBQ pork char sui, beef haw fun, Hawkers baos, chow faan, grilled Hawker skewers. $ BW TO L D Daily IL DESCO, 2665 Park St., 290-6711, ildescojax.com. Authentic Italian cuisine; wood-fired pizzas, pasta, baked Italian dishes, raw bar, spaghetti tacos. Daily HH. $$-$$$ FB K TO L D Daily JOHNNY’S DELI & GRILLE, 474 Riverside Ave., 356-8055. F Casual; made-to-order sandwiches, wraps. $ TO B L M-Sa LARRY’S GIANT SUBS, 1509 Margaret St., 674-2794. 7895 Normandy Blvd., 781-7600. 8102 Blanding Blvd., 779-1933. F SEE ORANGE PARK. METRO DINER, 4495 Roosevelt Blvd., 999-4600. F 2016 Best of Jax Winner. SEE SAN MARCO. MOON RIVER PIZZA, 1176 Edgewood Ave. S., 389-4442. F 2016 Best of Jax Winner. SEE AMELIA ISLAND. THE MOSSFIRE GRILL, 1537 Margaret St., 355-4434, mossfire.com. 2016 Best of Jax finalist. Near 5 Points intersection. Southwestern dishes: fish tacos, chicken enchiladas. HH M-Sa in upstairs lounge; HH all day Su. $$ FB K L D Daily MSHACK, 1012 Margaret St., 423-1283. SEE BEACHES. SOUTHERN ROOTS FILLING STATION, 1275 King St., 513-4726, southernrootsjax.com. 2016 Best of Jax Winner. Fresh vegan fare; local, organic ingredients. Specials, on bread, local greens/rice, change daily. Sandwiches, coffees, teas. $ Tu-Su SUN-RAY CINEMA, 1028 Park St., 359-0047, sunraycinema.com. 2016 Best of Jax Winner. First-run, indie and art films screened. Beer, local drafts, wine, pizza–Godbold, Black Lagoon Supreme, Cowford Pie–hot dogs, hummus, sandwiches, popcorn, nachos, brownies. $$ BW Daily SUSHI CAFÉ, 2025 Riverside Ave., Ste. 204, 384-2888, sushicafejax.com. F 2016 Best of Jax Winner. Monster, Rock-n-Roll, Dynamite Roll. Hibachi, tempura, katsu, teriyaki. Inside/patio. $$ BW L D Daily

ST. AUGUSTINE

AL’S PIZZA, 1 St. George St., 824-4383. F 2016 Best of Jax Winner. SEE BEACHES. CRUISERS GRILL, 3 St. George St., 824-6993. 2016 Best of Jax Winner. SEE BEACHES. THE FLORIDIAN, 72 Spanish St., 829-0655, thefloridianstaug.com. 2016 Best of Jax Winner. Updated Southern fare; fresh, local ingredients. Vegetarian, gluten-free option. Signature fried green tomato bruschetta, blackened fish cornbread stack; grits w/shrimp/fish/tofu. $$$ BW K TO L D W-M GYPSY CAB COMPANY, 828 Anastasia Blvd., 824-8244, gypsycab.com. F 33+ years. Varied urban cuisine menu changes twice daily. Signature: Gypsy chicken. Seafood, tofu, duck, veal. $$ FB R Su; L D Daily MARDI GRAS SPORTS BAR, 123 San Marco Ave., 347-3288, mardibar.com. Wings, nachos, shrimp, chicken, Phillys, sliders, soft pretzels. $$ FB TO L D Daily MOJO OLD CITY BBQ, 5 Cordova St., 342-5264, mojobbq.com. SEE AVONDALE. O’LOUGHLIN PUB, 6975 A1A S., 429-9715. Familyowned-and-operated. Authentic fish & chips, shepherd’s pie, corned beef & cabbage, bangers & mash, duck wings. $$ FB K TO L D Daily SALT LIFE FOOD SHACK, 321 A1A, 217-3256. SEE BEACHES.

METRO DINER, 1000 S. Ponce de Leon Blvd., 758-3323. F 2016 Best of Jax Winner. Dinner nightly. SEE SAN MARCO. SHANGHAI NOBBY’S, 10 Anastasia Blvd., 547-2188. Cuban-style, Philly cheesesteak sandwiches. $$ FB

SAN MARCO + SOUTHBANK

THE BEARDED PIG SOUTHERN BBQ & BEER GARDEN, 1224 Kings Ave., 619-2247, thebeardedpigbbq.com. 2016 Best of Jax Winner. Barbecue joint Southern style: brisket, pork, chicken, sausage, beef; veggie platters. $$ BW K TO Daily BISTRO AIX, 1440 San Marco Blvd., 398-1949, bistrox.com. F Mediterranean/French inspired menu changes seasonally. 250+ wines. Wood-fired oven baked, grilled specialties: pizza, pasta, risotto, steaks, seafood. Hand-crafted cocktails, specialty drinks. Dine outside. HH M-F. $$$ FB L D Daily BOLD BEAN COFFEE ROASTERS, 1905 Hendricks Ave. 2016 Best of Jax Winner. SEE RIVERSIDE. EUROPEAN STREET CAFÉ, 1704 San Marco Blvd., 398-9500. SEE RIVERSIDE. FUSION SUSHI, 1550 University Blvd. W., 636-8688, fusionsushijax.com. F Upscale; fresh sushi, sashimi, hibachi, teriyaki, kiatsu, seafood. $$ K L D Daily KITCHEN ON SAN MARCO, 1402 San Marco Blvd., 396-2344, kitchenonsanmarco.com. Gastropub serves local, national craft beers, specialty cocktails. Seasonal menu, with fresh, locally sourced ingredients. $$ FB R Su; L D Daily METRO DINER, 3302 Hendricks Ave., 398-3701, metrodinercom. F 2016 Best of Jax Winner. Original upscale diner in a historic 1930s-era building. Meatloaf, chicken pot pie, soups. This one serves dinner nightly. $$ B R L D Daily PIZZA PALACE RESTAURANT & PIZZERIA, 1959 San Marco Blvd., 399-8815, pizzapalacejax.com. F Family-owned&-operated; spinach pizza, chicken spinach calzones, ravioli, lasagna, parmigiana. Dine outside. HH. $$ BW K TO L D Daily TAVERNA, 1986 San Marco Blvd., 398-3005, tavernasanmarco.com. Chef Sam Efron’s authentic Italian; tapas, wood-fired pizza. Seasonal local produce, meats. Craft beer (some local), award-winning wine. $$$ FB K TO R L D Daily V PIZZA, 1406 Hendricks Ave., 527-1511, vpizza.com. Serving true artisan Neapolitana pizzas, hand-tossed, thin or thick crust. Baked dishes, subs, stromboli, wings, wraps. $$ FB to L D Daily

SOUTHSIDE + TINSELTOWN

ALHAMBRA THEATRE & DINING, 12000 Beach Blvd., 641-1212, alhambrajax.com. Open 50 years. Executive Chef DeJuan Roy’s themed menus. Reservations. $$ FB D Tu-Su EUROPEAN STREET CAFÉ, 5500 Beach Blvd., 398-1717. SEE RIVERSIDE. LARRY’S GIANT SUBS, 3611 St. Johns Bluff Rd. S., 641-6499. 4479 Deerwood Lake Pkwy., 425-4060. F SEE ORANGE PARK. MARIANAS GRINDS, 11380 Beach Blvd., Ste. 10, 206-612-6596. Pacific Islander fare, chamorro culture. Soups, stews, fitada, beef oxtail, katden pika; empanadas, lumpia, chicken relaguen, BBQ-style ribs, chicken. $$ TO B L D Tu-Su MOXIE KITCHEN + COCKTAILS, 4972 Big Island Dr., 9989744. 2016 Best of Jax Winner. Chef Tom Gray’s locally sourced contemporary American menu has starters— deviled farm eggs, chicken livers; favorites—chicken & waffles, Dr Pepper-glazed beef short ribs. Seared scallops, handmade gnocchi. Inventive cocktails, patio dining. HH daily. $$ FB K Su Br, L M-Sa; D Nightly

Harry’s Seafood Bar & Grille

Pizzalley

46 Avenida Menendez | 904-824-7765

117 St. George St. | 904-825-2627

Beautiful outpost serving up mouth-watering New Orleans style dishes in a leafy courtyard or on a balcony overlooking the bay. Try Harry’s signature Crab-Crusted Redfish!

Rustic hideaway between Charlotte and St. George Streets. Well-known for savory pastas, phenomenal salads and hand-tossed brick-oven pizzas. Try our homemade lasagna and pot roast (with our secret sauce!)

Prohibition Kitchen

Irie Couture Cakery

119 St. George St. | 904-209-5704

213 W. King St. | 904-534-8644

KIck back and belly-up to this new prohibitionera restaurant and bar with weekend live music after 10! Great Chefs Brad and Jeff create gastropub fare with entree surprises like the PK Burger (red dragon cheddar, fried egg and bacon jam!) Everything is fresh and handmade.

Newest addition to West KIng’s up-andcoming community. Chef Jenielle brings an artsy charm to her luscious cakes and pastries- Don’t miss her great crunchy and flaky Chocolate Chip cookies and local bean drip coffee!

Raintree Restaurant

Growers Alliance Cafe and Gift Shop

Famous old-style Victorian mansion specializing in steaks and seafood. Ask about our signature Beef Wellington! Relax on our wrap-around patio under the twinkling lights just across from the Mission Nombre de Dios cross!

Cozy, organic/fair trade Kenyan coffee shop offers coffee, nuts, arts and crafts directly from the villagers and healthy fresh made quiche, pastries, samosas and mandazis. Try craft beers and international wines on our patio! (10% of sales support Kenyan village projects)

City Bistro Tea House and Coffee Co.

Present Moment Cafe

Farm-sourced European-style Bistro cuisine Direct Trade Coffee & Organic locally blended loose-leaf teas - Craft Beer & Wine - Vegetarian, Vegan, Gluten-Free & Healthy Options. For weekly Chef’s specials & community events please go to citybistrofl.com

The only vegetarian cafe in St. Augustine using fresh, organic ingredients with gluten-free, raw and vegan options. Customers love the Pad Thai with our special homemade sauce!

102 San Marco Ave. | 904-824-7211

1280A N. Ponce De Leon | 904-209-6810

322 Anastasia Blvd. | 904-371-7869

224 W. King St. | 904-827-4499

APRIL 26-MAY 2, 2017 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | 25

DINING DIRECTORY MSHACK, 10281 Midtown Pkwy., 642-5000. SEE BEACHES. OVINTE, 10208 Buckhead Branch Dr., 900-7730, ovintecom. Italy, Spain, Mediterranean. Small plates, tapas, charcuterie: ceviche fresco, pappardelle bolognese, lobster ravioli. 240-bottle/wines, 75/glass; craft spirits. $$ FB R, Su; D Nightly

SPRINGFIELD + NORTHSIDE

ANDY’S GRILL, 1810 W. Beaver St., 354-2821, jaxfarmersmarket.com. Inside Jax Farmers Market. Local,

regional, international produce. Breakfast, sandwiches. $ B L D M-Sa LARRY’S GIANT SUBS, 12001 Lem Turner Rd., 764-9999. SEE ORANGE PARK. UPTOWN KITCHEN & BAR, 1303 Main St. N., 355-0734, uptownmarketjax.com. Bite Club certified. Fresh fare, innovative menus, farm-to-table selections, daily specials. $$ BW TO B L Daily

CHEFFED-UP

He’s not much of a spackler, but Chef Bill’s crackers are DELISH

CHEFFED-UP

HANDY

MAN

THE BE THE BEST ST FFEELING EELI EE LING LI NG IIN N TH THEE WO WORL WORLD RLD RL D IS TTO O BE the expert. When you are the expert in your chosen vocation, the non-experts treat you with an amazing amount of deference and respect. When taken to the extreme, you’re looked upon as an awe-inspiring figure, one whose opinions—even in matters outside your field—are treated with reverence. My favorite example of this happens frequently with actors. Why do we value the opinions of actors in any subject outside of their field of expertise, pretending to be somebody else (btw, this is what little children do for fun)? It’s completely ridiculous to value an actor’s opinion on medicine just because they played a doctor on TV. People in modern society have become so super-specialized that we never seem to have the time to become proficient in other fields. This is especially true with chefs. The long hours, the grueling physical demands, and the immense variety of both foodstuffs and ways to prepare them can be all-consuming. As for me, if I can’t be 100 percent into a project, then I’m just not interested in attempting it. After all, one of the foundations of professional cooking is that repetition leads to proficiency. This is the reason why many chefs are not handy at home. If they get only one shot at a project, the likelihood of a proficient result is very slim. When things break in the house, we call a repairman. I don’t expect an electrician to be a great cook, and vice versa. Through most of my career, this was a non-issue until I became a business owner. I’m in the process of trying to open a small savory bakery in a very old building. The place, though quaint and attractive, really needs some love in the form of minor repairs and cosmetics. Little projects that would be no big deal for a professional are huge issues for me. 26 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | APRIL 26-MAY 2, 2017

Fixing a couple of loose, broken floor tiles is simple enough, right? Well, not on the first try. On the second try, it was a little easier; by the third attempt, the result was acceptable, though I still wanted to tear them up and try again. And covering holes in the walls: a little touch-up painting just doesn’t do the trick. Now I have to learn how to spackle, URGH! It goes on and on. I find it to be quite unsatisfying. After all, I’m used to being the expert—it’s frustrating to not be one. This little lavosh recipe will be one of the items I’ll offer at my new place, assuming I finish my handyman projects.

CHEF BILL’S LAVOSH CRACKERS Ingredients: • 16 Oz. semolina • 13-1/3 Oz. all-purpose flour • 16 Oz. water • Pinch salt Directions: 1. Mix flour and salt in a food processer. 2. With the machine running slowly, add 1. the water. Mix until a dough ball forms. 3. Turn out and knead for several minutes. 4. Cover and let rest. 5. Roll out with a pasta machine. 6. Place on a silicon mat lined sheet 1. pan, brush with olive oil and garnish 1. as desired. 7. Bake at 400°F until light brown 1. and crispy. 8. Break apart and serve. Until we cook again,

Chef Bill Thompson cheffedup@folioweekly.com ____________________________________ Contact Chef Bill Thompson, owner of Amelia Island Culinary Academy, at cheffedup@ folioweekly.com to find inspiration and get you Cheffed Up!

PETS LOOKIN’ FOR LOVE FOLIO

W E E K LY

FOLIO LIVING DEAR

PET

LOVERS’

GUIDE

DAVI

Make sure your vet LOVES YOUR PET as much as you do

DOGGIE HOUSER,

PET M.D. WE ALL KNOW THAT THE WORST TIME TO look for a vet is when you really need one. Try these tips to help you plan ahead and track the right vet for you: SCOPE OUT THE FACILITY Messes happen— standard operating procedure. But the place shouldn’t reek. Take a tour to make sure the facility is tidy and free of unpleasant odors. Exam rooms should be spotless and not used for storage or a snuggle spot for the clinic cat. If the office is well-organized with a cheerful staff—swipe right. ASK AROUND Before reading Yelp reviews, try polling your own personal network. Word-of-mouth is one of the best resources around. A trusted friend will tell you if their vet is a good match for your pet. Asking for references at local animal shelters is another way to filter your search. EMERGENCY CARE Hours of operation is a biggie. You never know when your pooch may swallow a tennis ball—or an entire bottle of pills. Make sure that you choose an animal hospital with an emergency plan in place. FIRST IMPRESSIONS Just like human doctors, a veterinarian should have a good pet-side manner. Look for one who communicates well, respects your concerns, and demonstrates a keen interest in your pet. A good vet will answer your questions and know how to soothe a stressful situation instead of adding to it. CHECK CREDENTIALS Your veterinary clinic should be certified by the American Veterinary Association, which indicates it’s held to higher standards of excellence in care—gold star to those with AAHA certifications. If you feel the need to bring a decoy before letting your beloved pet be examined—swipe left. LET’S GIVE A TAIL WAG TO LOCAL veterinarians for the paw-some jobs they do for pets every day. Our pets’ lives are

PET TIP: FELINE ALONE?

literally in their hands, and they rarely let us down. “Dr. Lincoln at Fort Caroline Animal Hospital is super-duper! She takes extra special care of me—and my mom!” — Davi “Dr. Stacy at Miramar Animal Hospital is the best! He’s helped me through the years, nursing me through tummy issues and allergic reactions.” — Reilly “I love my vet at Cedar Hills Animal Hospital. Dr. Acree is gentle, considerate and caters to my needs. He even says ‘Hey, buddy’ when I visit.” — Gizmo “Julington Creek Animal Hospital’s Dr. Rod is great! He’s gentle, soft-spoken and makes our visits less scary.” — Rhett & Jezebel “I love Dr. G at Jacksonville Community Pet Clinic West. She’s so kind and patient when I get nervous, so having a vet who understands makes my trip easy-breezy.” — Trippie “Coastal Veterinary Hospital’s Dr. Avery is so sweet and gentle with me. That means a lot ’cause I’m 12 years old and weigh only 14 pounds. She nuzzles me just like my mom does every time I go.” — Lucy “I love Mandarin Animal Hospital! They give me hugs and treats, and always listen to my mom’s concerns.” — Taffy “Dr. Katie is the most compassionate vet ever! She knows I’m older and is extra-gentle with my fragile body. Once I thought the rainbow bridge wasn’t far, but with her help I’m still here, feeling much better.” — Riley April 29 is World Veterinary Day. Whatever you do to thank the people who keep your furry friends by your side— do something. Davi mail@folioweekly.com ____________________________________ It’s no accident that Davi the dachshund is healthy and happy—and he’s grateful for the animal-loving medical peeps he sees.

STUDIES SHOW THAT CATS DON’T typically meow at each other; they use that communications skill with their humans. So if you’re ever at home feeling sad and lonely, meow your problems to your furry beast. And like humans, cats are great at changing their vocalizations depending on the situation. So don’t be afraid to get a little emotional with Catsanova. APRIL 26-MAY 2, 2017 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | 27

FREEWILL ASTROLOGY

DALE RATERMANN’s Folio Weekly Crossword presented by

SPIRITUAL BATTERIES, CAULIFLOWER, COLD OMELETS & MOONSHINE

Serving Excellence Since 1928 Member American Gem Society

San Marco 2044 San Marco Blvd. 398-9741

Ponte Vedra

THE SHOPPES OF PONTE VEDRA

330 A1A North 280-1202

Avondale 3617 St. Johns Ave. 388-5406

FOLIO WEEKLY CROSSWORD 1

24 27

25 30

35 41

46 49 55 58

31 “Close call!” 35 ___ E. Simmons State Forest 10 M Shack sign 14 Type of IRA 15 Sidestep 16 Old Italian dough 17 Jax hotel 18 Rug fiber 19 In two shakes 20 Like some diets 22 So-called 24 Auction add-on 25 SJSO violations 27 St. Johns Town Center store 31 Bemoans 32 Empty weight 33 In a scary way 35 Sidecar, e.g. 38 Miss Florida crown 40 Nabokov girl 41 Left on a boat 43 Cummer Museum URL ender 44 Render harmless 47 Better than never 48 Type of ad 49 Big game plans 51 Smart alecks 55 WTLV net. 56 Lucky trinket

DOWN 31 Mandarin HS dance 32 Baseball Grounds plate 33 Sicilian peak 34 Dentist’s suggestion 35 Jags benchwarmer 36 JIA rental chain 37 Cow catcher 38 DROID, for one 39 Lending a hand 10 Full House twins 11 Devout 12 Lose ground, literally 13 Some iPods 21 Ewe’s milieu

28 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | APRIL 26-MAY 2, 2017

GEMINI (May 21-June 20): According to my astrological omen-reading, it’s time to take a break from the magic you’ve been weaving since your 2016 birthday. Go on a brief sabbatical. Allow your deep mind to fully integrate lessons you’ve learned and transformations you’ve undergone the last 11 months. In a few weeks, you can resume where you left off. Now you need breathing room. Your spiritual batteries need to recharge. Hard work should be balanced with a regimen of relaxed playtime.

57 Olive stuffer 62 Footnote abbr. 63 Action News reporter Bennett 65 Lye, in a lab 66 Mandolin kin 67 Prepped spuds 68 Pablo’s Grill treat 69 SEC tourney ranking 70 Beyond zaftig 71 Goth cross

54 57

ACROSS

TAURUS (April 20-May 20): “One of the advantages of being disorderly,” said author A.A. Milne, “is that one is constantly making exciting discoveries.” I wouldn’t usually offer this as advice to a methodical dynamo like you, but my astrological omen interpretation compels me to override personal theories. Consider experimenting with jaunty, rambunctious behavior in the days ahead, even if it generates disorder. The potential reward? Exciting discoveries, of course.

48 51

46 Like Lake Ocklawaha 48 Joined together 50 G-men 51 Siren sounds 52 Diffuse 53 Offering at The Lodge & Club... and the puzzle’s circles spell its location 54 Cook’s kicker 58 T and Cube 59 Zesty India bread 60 Tick-___ 61 “Yikes!” 64 Bearded Pig bit

23 “Ta-ta!” 26 ___ Club 27 Final hurricane of ’16 28 Jax Zoo den 29 Kind of race or queen 30 Causing a rise 34 Vitamin stat 35 Mr. Piggy 36 Drawing for beginners 37 AAA offerings 39 Folksy saying 42 Fetus feeder 45 Nirvana’s last studio album

A S H O R E

S T A T E D

L E G P L U S O Y D A B S

O K R A

L I E D

I C O R N A P P F I R E O M B E P E E T A A M L Y

O N S E T

P I N O C H L E

C O R D

S T P

C O A R W A P N E G T E A

S D C S A L L E P E R S E A N R A E P S C A T E R R I T I V P E E R R

CANCER (June 21-July 22): Apparently, a lot of kids in the UK don’t like to eat vegetables. In response, food researchers there marketed exotic variations designed to appeal to the bairns’ tastebuds. The new dishes include chocolate-flavored carrots, pizza-flavored corn and cheese-and-onion-flavored cauliflower. Don’t get quite as extreme in trying to broaden your appeal, but see if you can at least reach out to your potential constituency with a new wrinkle or fresh twist. Be imaginative as you expand the range of choices for colleagues and clientele.

S K E W

LEO (July 23-Aug. 22): In speaking about the arduous quest to become one’s authentic self, writer Thomas Merton used an example of poets who aspire to be original but end up being imitative. “Many poets never succeed in being themselves,” he said. “They never get around to being the particular poet they are intended to be by God. They never become the person or artist who is called for by all of the circumstances of their individual lives. They waste years in vain efforts to be some other poet. They wear out their minds and bodies in a hopeless endeavor to have somebody else’s experiences or write somebody else’s poems.” It’s a problem for non-poets, too. Many never succeed in becoming ourselves. Lucky you: In the next few weeks and months, you’ll have an unprecedented chance to be more of who you really are. To expedite the process, work on dissolving an attraction you may have to acting like someone else.

O B J A V E L S A G O I F I S H C E O E L I O M E S L E C T E N T S

VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22):On many occasions, French acrobat Charles Blondin walked a tightrope spanning the gorge near Niagara Falls. His cable was three and a quarter inches in diameter, 1,100 feet long, and 160 feet above the Niagara River. Once, he did the whole crossing doing back flips and somersaults. Another time, he carried a small stove on his back, stopped midway to cook an omelet, which he ate before stepping on solid ground. It’s a good time to carry out your equivalent of his feats. What daring

SOLUTION TO 4.19.17 PUZZLE B A G G E R

ARIES (March 21-April 19): I have misgivings when I see bears riding bicycles, tigers dancing, or Aries peeps wielding diplomatic phrases and making careful compromises at committee meetings. I’m impressed by the disciplined expression of primal power, but I worry the creature’s soul is behaving with civilized restraint. Take advantage of opportunities to make deals and forge win-win situations, but keep a part of your fiery heart untamed. Don’t let others think they’ve figured you out.

O N E P M

W O O L

N O N O

actions haven’t you tried even though you’ve been trained or educated to perform them well? LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 22): Ready for some subterranean journeys? They may not involve literal explorations of deep caverns, ancient tunnels and underground streams. You may not stumble upon lost treasure, forgotten artifacts and valuable ruins. Then again, you might. At least you’ll encounter metaphorical versions of some of these. What mysteries would you love to solve? What secrets would be fun to learn? What shadows would you be excited to illuminate? SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21): Why would you guzzle mind-clouding moonshine when you’ll eventually get a chance to sip a heartreviving tonic? Why spoil your appetite loading up on non-nutritious hors d’oeuvres when a healthy feast will soon be served? Suppress a compulsion for instant gratification. It may seem impossible to summon such heroic patience, but you can. In the long run, you’ll be glad you did. SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21): “You’ll always be my favorite what-if.” Years ago, I heard that whispered in my ear. It was from the mouth of a wonderful-but-impossible woman. We’d just decided it wasn’t a good plan, as we’d once imagined, to run away and get married at Angkor Wat in Cambodia and then spend the next decade being tour guides, leading travelers on exotic getaways to the world’s sacred sites. “You’ll always be my favorite what-if” was a poignant but liberating moment. It allowed us to move on with our lives and pursue more realistic and productive dreams. Consider triggering a liberation like that soon. CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19): Increase the people, places and experiences you love, as well as the wise intensity with which you love them. From an astrological perspective, now’s a terrific time to upgrade appreciation and adoration for the whole world and everything in it. To get in the mood, here are forms of ardor you may want to pursue: eraunophilia, an attraction to thunder and lightning; cymophilia, a fascination with waves and waviness; chorophilia, a passion for dancing; asymmetrophilia, a zeal for asymmetrical things; and sapiophilia, an erotic enchantment with intelligence. AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18): You could go online and buy an antique Gothic throne or a psychedelic hippie couch to spruce up your living room. For the bathroom, get a Japanese “wonder toilet,” complete with a heated seat, automated bidet and white-noise generator. Another good idea: Build a sacred crazy altar in your bedroom for rituals of playful liberation. Or get a kit to create spontaneous poetry on the refrigerator door with those tiny magnets with evocative words on them. Any more ideas? PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20): Among America’s 50 states, Texas has the thirdhighest rate of teenage pregnancies. It’s not a coincidence that sex education in Texas is steeped in ignorance. Few high schools offer contraception information; they just advise kids to avoid sex. In the weeks ahead, you can’t afford to be as deprived of the truth as those kids. Even more than usual, you need accurate information tailored to your precise needs, not fake news, ideological delusions or self-serving propaganda. Gather insight and wisdom from the best sources. That’s how to avoid behavior irrelevant to your life goals. That’s how to attract experiences to serve your highest good. Rob Brezsny freewillastrology@freewillastrology.com

NEWS OF THE WEIRD SO … IDEAL MOMENT TO COMMIT A CRIME ELSEWHERE

A June 2016 police raid on David Jessen’s Fresno County California farmhouse caused a $150,000 mess when sheriff ’s deputies and Clovis Police Department officers “rescued” it from a trespassing homeless man. The massive destruction led to Jessen’s lawsuit announced in March. The misdemeanant helped himself to an ice cream bar, some milk and half a tomato, but was otherwise “unarmed”; however, by the time the police standoff ended, the “crime scene” included more than 50 cop cars, a SWAT team (and backups), two helicopters, standby ambulances, a police robot, and a crisis negotiation team. Windows, walls and wrought-iron doors were destroyed; tear gas and a “flash bomb” were used. Jessen suspects the farmhouse’s isolation made cops think it presented a good training opportunity.

GOOD FOR THE GANDER

“Pro-choice” activist Jessica Farrar, a Texas state legislator, introduced a bill in March to create consistency between the state’s rigorous regulation of women’s reproductive functions and those of men (regulation which in either case she calls “invasive” and “unnecessary”). Because Texas’s anti-abortion laws highlight “procreation” as a crucial government interest, she believes male use of erectiledysfunction drugs should be regulated as abortion is. Under her bill, individual use of Viagra or similar drugs must be preceded by “counseling” similar to that required by abortion laws, and since male masturbation involves the “wasting” of precious sperm cells, it would require “beforehand” counseling.

DEEP THOUGHTS FOR SUCH A SHALLOW MIND

In April, Jason Sexton told KFSM-TV in Fort Smith, Arkansas, he’d been digging a massive hole neighbors noticed, 34 feet deep and with separate tunnels extending from the main hole. Police came to check it out, since it was on another person’s private property (and not the city’s, which Sexton had thought). He said he’d been digging off and on for three years to get an answer to whether “the Spanish” had been in Fort Smith mining iron centuries ago and, if so, the site should

be a lucrative tourist destination. Sexton said he felt he had to explain: “Nobody in their right mind,” he said, “would dig a hole [this big] for no reason.”

Folio Weekly helps you connect with the paramour of your dreams. Go to folioweekly.com/i-saw-u.html, fill out the FREE form correctly (40 words or fewer, dammit) by 5 p.m. Friday (for the next Wednesday’s FW) – next stop: Bliss!

HANG ON, HON, LEMME LOAD MY GUN

At a time of growing awareness that some folks seem almost addicted to cellphones and instant 24/7 communication, police in Brookfield, Wisconsin, released surveillance photos of a woman in the act of robbing banks on March 25 and 27, standing at teller counters and talking on the phone during the entire episodes. Acting on a tip from the photos, police arrested Sarah Kraus, 33, on March 28.

THEY IS A MURDERER

College activist Pablo Gomez Jr., 22, was arrested in Berkeley, California, in March and charged with the brutal stabbing death of an elementary school teacher. Gomez, a senior at University of California Berkeley, is well-known on campus for insisting on a gender identity for which the pronoun “he” is an inappropriate reference. Hence, “they” was charged with what is so far the only homicide in Berkeley this year.

MAYBE WE COULD PATTYCAKE INSTEAD?

Paul Perry Jr., 39, sound asleep behind the wheel of his car, with motor running at 6 a.m. on April 2, was in no position to talk his way out of a DUI ticket, but did offer a gentle challenge to a Youngstown, Ohio, police officer. Several times, according to the police report, Perry offered to “thumb-wrestle” the cop to get out of the ticket. From the report: “Perry was advised officers would not thumbwrestle him.”

I’D RATHER DIE THAN PICK UP DOG POO

On April 9, a father, 43, and his son, 22, argued about who would walk the dog at their South Side Chicago home. They apparently determined to settle the issue with a gunfight, and police, who recovered two weapons, said both men suffered multiple wounds. The son was killed, and the father was in critical condition. Chuck Shepherd weirdnews@earthlink.net

Arbor Day is fast approaching! Don’t sit under the apple tree alone again this year–FW’s cynical editorial staff has a sure-fire method to get you in a tree, k-i-s-s-i-n-g! Read these messages or submit your own! Here’s how

One: Write a five-word headline so the person recognizes the moment y’all shared. Two: Describe the person, like, “You: Climbing Treaty Oak illegally, barely dressed.” Three: Describe yourself, like, “Me: Writing citations in my Smokey the Bear uniform.” Four: Describe the moment, like, “ISU parkouring among the ancient branches, breaking limbs and my heart.” Five: Meet, fall in love, reserve a church.* No names, emails, websites, etc. And fer chrissake, it’s forty (40) words or fewer. Get a love life with Folio Weekly ISUs! BARTENDER WANNABE TEACHER You wanted to impact young minds as a teacher. I suggested fixing shattered wrists as a doctor. On second thought, how about making a huge impact as my date? I was the only guy at brunch bar. When: March 25. Where: Best Brunch, I-295 & 9A. #1649-0405 “IRISH LASS” USHER You: blonde, blue-eyed, Kelly green dress. Me: tall, shy, warm-up band member. On rehearsal break, we SU two in balcony, raced up. We shared a bottle of fake Crown (I lied). I’ll find you, love you forever. When: Unsure. Where: Florida Theatre. #1648-0322 ENC-1102 LOVE You: German nose; matched mine. Brown eyes entranced me. Me: Awkward, yellow-haired female. Someone took your seat; you sat beside me. We watched “The Room.” Best time I ever had. May I hold your hand forever? When: March 2015. Where: FSCJ. #1647-0315 I HELD THE DOOR You: Beautiful blonde , sundress, exiting as I entered. Me: Beard, tie; stopped, stared. We locked eyes; you were going out to your Charger. I’d like to hold the door for you again in the future. When: Feb. 27. Where: Firehouse. #1646-0315

M SHACK RIVERSIDE COOK ISU every day at work; you’re a cook, I’m a waitress. You’re so hot but I don’t have the courage to tell you. Single? If so, please reply. Love to chat sometime. Signed, Too Nervous. When: Every day. Where: Riverside. #1640-0111 I WILL ALWAYS LOVE YOU You: I knew you before you were born. Me: God I am here for you always, just call on me. I died for you, so live for me and find the peace you seek. When: Jan. 1, 2017. Where: Everywhere. #1639-0111 WE SAVED A TURTLE Day after Christmas. We were trying to save a turtle on Baymeadows in front of SunTrust. My dad and I drove you and turtle to pond. Wished I got more than just your name. When: Dec. 26. Where: By SunTrust Bank, Baymeadows Rd. #1638-0104 ZOO CAROUSEL DADDY On carousel with my son. ISU behind me with your son. You: Male, tall, blondish, beautiful blue eyes. Me: Female, busty brunette. Should’ve talked on the ride; my kid was screaming. Wanna play date? When: Dec. 21. Where: Jax Zoo Carousel. #1637-0104

SEXY ITALIAN IN PRIMELENDING SHIRT You were funny (sarcastic), had sexy voice, and you were wearing all black. Hands down the most amazing man I’ve ever met. I love you always. When: Feb. 25. Where: Downtown. #1645-0301

ENGLISH MUFFIN HELLO, COOL MOOSE U: Carmine’s shirt, prettiest art admirer ever. Me: Tattooed brow, food maker. Made your hello with a smiley-face flag. Art is an experience we can enjoy together. When: Dec. 7. Where: Cool Moose Café Riverside. #1636-1214

BROWN HAIR, SITTING BEHIND ME You: Curly brown hair. Shared some laughs and a DUI. Me: Floral dress, great jokes. Thought we shared a moment; you were called back too soon. Hope to see you March 7th, same spot, 4:15 p.m. When: Feb. 2. Where: Ocean Street. #1644-0208

DAYCARE DAD ISU when I drop off my daughter. You drop off your little one. Coffee? You: Tallish, tattoos, work boots you take off before entering baby room, absolutely adorable; single? Me: Red hair, always hoping I see you. When: Almost every day. Where: Kids World Academy. #1635-1214

HANDSOME DOG LOVER, CLEVER SMILE ISU at bar, your eyes said hello. At store, U smiled at me. Walked your dog, I drove by, thought, “Is this déjà vu … ?” U waved, same handsome smile. Who are U; meet again? When: Jan. 27. Where: Alexandria Oaks Park, Winn-Dixie, Grape & Grain. #1643-0201

CROSSWORD QT You had orange socks and an orange Element. You got a cappuccino (or two) and started with a crossword. Your laptop had an Equality sticker on it … either you really like math, or we should meet. Maybe both. When: Nov. 29. Where: Bold Bean, Riverside. #1634-1207

COOKBOOK CUTIE You: Sexy AF chef’s coat; warmed my kolache before you put it in BREW oven; asked my name, I spilled my beer. Me: Dark, mysterious, torn “sex me up” shirt. Hope you’ll get me breakfast in bed. When: Jan. 12. Where: BREW. #1642-0201

CARMELO’S SILVER FOX You: Tall, handsome, older gentleman, exceptional British accent! Me: Tall brunette who visits frequently. You’re flirty, but let’s make it official! Tea time? When: Nov. 11. Where: Carmelo’s Pizzeria, St. Augustine. #1633-1207

CHOCOLATE THUNDER You: New hire at my old job; immediately caught my eye; tall, dark, handsome BUT rotund sealed deal; innocent until first movie date; rest is history. Me: Strategic approach–12-step hot sausage program, gifs transfer. Happy V-day CT! When: Sept. 26, 2016. Where: West Jax. #1641-0201

MY HOT, SEXY NEIGHBOR You: Tall, white sports jersey (No. 12, I think), flag tattoo. Me: Brunette, sunglasses, busty. While checking mail ISU on balcony playing darts, smoking cigar. Welcome to the neighborhood. Throw your dart at me anytime. When: Oct. 25. Where: Coquina Bay Apartments. #1632-1026

*or any other appropriate site at which folks can engage in a civil union or marriage or whatever …

APRIL 26-MAY 2, 2017 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | 29

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YOUR PORTAL TO REACHING 95,000+ READERS WEEKLY

of quotas and work schedule rules. Position is a telecommuting position and can be performed from anywhere in the U.S. Submit resume to NorthgateArinso, Inc., P. Fox, 8880 Freedom Crossing Trail, Jacksonville, Florida 32256. Reference Position Number: 030319/000770 FOLIO MEDIA HOUSE WANTS YOU! Immediate Opening! Folio Media House, established 1987, is expanding its reach in Northeast Florida with comprehensive media products. We’re seeking an experienced salesperson to add to our current team. Significant commission potential and mentorship with an industry leader. Main Job Tasks and Responsibilities: Make sales calls to new and existing clients, generate and qualify leads, prepare sales action plans and strategies. Experience in sales required, proven ability to achieve sales targets; Salesforce software knowledge a plus. Key Competencies: money-driven, persuasive, planning and strategizing. If you have a track record of sales success, send a cover letter and résumé for consideration to staylor@folioweekly.com or call Sam at 904-860-2465. OPERATIONS MANAGER Delicomb, Jacksonville Beach’s most popular coffee and sandwich shop, seeks an experienced food-service operations manager to train, encourage and supervise our staff. Successful candidate will appreciate the care we have invested in our staffi ng choices and add to our spirit of support, customer service and…fun. Apply with cover letter and résumé to: apply@delicomb.com

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FOLIOVATION : RON CHAMBLIN

AS A PERSON MATURES, POLITE society expects that person to age gracefully, to slow down and do ageappropriate activities: play shuffleboard, knit, go to dinner at 4 p.m., sit in a park and play chess. Jacksonville’s own literary benefactor, Ron Chamblin, quite obviously eschews that expectation–he turns 75 on Wednesday, April 26 and there’s not even a hint of an indication that he’s slowing down in any way, shape or form. Ron Chamblin is, of course, the owner and the calm, assured strength behind the joy that is Chamblin BookMine and Chamblin’s Uptown, bookstores so full of, well, books, a “quick trip” to either site (Roosevelt Boulevard and Laura Street, respectively) is impossible. Since opening for business 1976 with 15 boxes of books salvaged from a fire, the books have been stacked on the floors, in

boxes, on countertops, just everywhere. And on the shelves, they’re not in any boring Dewey Decimal order, but by subject or author or, as in the case of some history categories, by certain wars or decades. This seemingly random organization is much more interesting than the stodgy 19th-century method public libraries use. And the thousands of folks who frequent Chamblin’s stores must agree; every time I go to either one, it’s slam full of book-lovers, looking for a certain tome or just browsing, most unaware of the force behind the ordered chaos. Ron sells–and buys– books, mostly gently used, but he also donates books. A treasured, rather salty, member of his staff estimates that he’s given more than 750,000 books to Duval County schools over the years, and bestowed $150,000 to

the literary endeavors of the University of North Florida, along with curriculum sets for new teachers. Among the many amenities at the new Sulzbacher Village community for women and families opening soon on the Northside, there will be a library full of books donated by Chamblin. Community is important to him, but nothing takes priority over the books and his operation. Concerning the wide popularity of the thriving bookstores, Chamblin sums it up: “I really think our success is due to one single fact, which has to do with the unique quality of my personality.” Sarcasm aside, Ron Chamblin is successful, and we here at Folio Weekly wish him a happy 75th birthday, and many happy returns of the day, for years to come. Marlene Dryden mdryden@folioweekly.com APRIL 26-MAY 2, 2017 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | 31