2 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | DECEMBER 13-19, 2017
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THIS WEEK // 12.13-12.19.17 // VOL. 30 ISSUE 37 COVER STORY
THE DEAD BEAR [12]
NO WITNESS
What happened in the seconds before KEEGAN VON ROBERTS was shot? Only his killer knows for sure story by CLAIRE GOFORTH
FEATURED ARTICLES FEATURED
HAIL TO THE CHIEF
BY A.G. GANCARSKI BRIAN HUGHES: Lenny Curry’s gutsiest hire
[8]
FROM MANY, ONE
[33]
BY KEITH MARKS Interactive HOLIDAY LIGHT INSTALLATION shows the strength and beauty of community collaboration
BOILER ROOM
BY ERIC MONGAR Former callcenter worker calls out SO-CALLED charity
[47]
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FOLIO WEEKLY MAGAZINE IS PUBLISHED EVERY WEDNESDAY THROUGHOUT NORTHEAST FLORIDA AND CAMDEN COUNTY, GEORGIA. It contains opinions of contributing writers that are not necessarily the opinion of this publication. Folio Weekly Magazine welcomes editorial and photographic contributions. Calendar information must be received two weeks in advance of event date. Copyright © Folio Publishing, Inc. 2017. All rights reserved. Advertising rates and information are available on request. An advertiser purchases right of publication only. One free issue copy per person. Additional copies and back issues are $1 each at the office or $4 by U.S. mail, based on availability. First Class mail subscriptions are $48 for 13 weeks, $96 for 26 weeks and $189 for 52 weeks. Please recycle Folio Weekly. Folio Weekly Magazine is printed on 100% recycled paper using soy-based inks.
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THE MAIL YOU CAN HELP END SEXUAL HARASSMENT
IN LIGHT OF THE #METOO CAMPAIGN AND ALL the allegations against prominent figures, sexual harassment is at the forefront in headlines across the nation. Whether it’s about a Hollywood executive, an all-star sports figure or eminent politician, the issue of unlawful harassment continues to show its pervasive face across our contemporary world. Unfortunately, sexual harassment in the workplace is very real, and it happens every day. In its most fundamental definition, sexual harassment is unwelcome behavior that [is forced] on workers because of their sex. It occurs when a person’s submission to or rejection of sexual advances is used as the basis for employment decisions about him or her, or submission to sexual advances is made a condition of his or her employment (quid pro quo harassment). It may also occur when sexual conduct or gender-based hostility is sufficiently severe or pervasive enough, it creates an intimidating, hostile or offensive work environment (hostile work environment harassment). Regardless of the intent, sexual harassment in the workplace should never be tolerated. Fortunately, there are remedies. As the agency charged with shining a light on discrimination in the state of Florida, the Florida Commission on Human Relations is committed to eradicating all forms of harassment that can affect every one of us. The commission offers training to businesses, agencies and individuals, teaching how to avoid creating or permitting a working environment where sexual harassment exists. I encourage all employers and employees to become aware of the issue of sexual harassment and carefully address inappropriate behavior. Remember, you do not have to keep it to yourself. If you think you are a victim of sexual harassment, you can file a complaint with the commission by visiting our website at fchr.state.fl.us, or by contacting us directly at 850-488-7082.
By knowing what to do and who to call, business owners, managers and employees can assist the commission in its goal to shine a light on sexual harassment and other forms of discrimination in the workplace. Michelle Wilson, Executive Director Florida Commission on Human Relations via email
OVERSET
THE RICHES OF HIS GRACE
RE.: “Art of Contrition,” by A.G. Gancarski, Nov. 29 YOUR OP-ED IS A GRIM EULOGY OF A LIFE OF service. It doesn’t rationalize the “transactional philanthropy” of white billionaires contributing for “favors,” but demonstrates how an honorable woman sacrifices for the good of youth. Having witnessed the community prayers this af ternoon at First New Zion Missionary Baptist Church with their clergy, family and friends during a testimonial lunch and the unwavering commitment from her home church, Bethel Baptist Institutional Church, during Communion Sunday, as we await the judge’s ruling, gives me solace knowing that she “walked the talk” … praying for redemption. Christine Fletcher via email
AN AL CAPONE-STYLE TAKE-DOWN
RE.: “Is a Local Christian School Publicly Supporting Accused Sexual Predator Roy Moore?” folioweekly.com, by Claire Goforth, Nov. 30 THIS IS AGAINST THE LAW. A CHURCH, AS A TAXexempt organization under Internal Revenue Code §501(c)(3), is absolutely prohibited from directly or indirectly participating or intervening in any political campaign in support of or opposition to any candidate for elective public office. See Treasury Regulation §1.501(c)(3)-1(c)(3)(iii). Yvonne Dominiak via Facebook
LEND YOUR VOICE If you’d like to respond to something you read in the pages of Folio Weekly, please send an email (with your name, address, and phone number for verification purposes only) to mail@folioweekly.com, visit us at folioweekly.com, or follow us on Twitter or Facebook (@folioweekly) and join the conversation.
BRICKBATS + BOUQUETS BOUQUETS TO KATE AMATO FOUNDATION During the inaugural Giving Thanks for Kate weekend, the Kate Amato Foundation, with help from Aqua Grill and its owner Cary Hart, raised $83,000 for pediatric cancer research, according to Lisa and Jeff Amato. The Amatos lost their 11-year-old daughter Kate to rhabdomyosarcoma, a rare, aggressive form of pediatric cancer, just after Thanksgiving last year. Donations go to innovative research projects determined by the Foundation’s Scientific Advisory Board, comprising national leading pediatric oncologists. Funds came from a wine dinner and live auction at Aqua Grill Sunday night, hosted by WJXT’s Nikki Kimbleton, a golf tournament and silent auction at Marsh Landing Country Club on Monday and donations at Aqua Grill and online Thanksgiving weekend. BRICKBATS TO THE VEHICLE VANDALS An “alert reader” sent us a photo, which, it turns out, is all over Facebook, posted originally by Sonja Emily Fitch, a local gadfly who calls out Jax Beach city councilpersons and other folks in positions of authority whenever she sees what she perceives as wrongdoing. Regardless of her political stance, no one deserves getting their li’l Volkswagen spray-painted, by Trump Nazis or anyone else.
No Art in B&B
BOUQUETS TO MIRTHA BARZAGA Davidson Realty agent Barzaga’s holiday donation drive on Saturday, Dec. 2 was her most successful ever. The realtor’s annual effort at the King & Bear amenity center benefits Emergency Services & Homeless Coalition of St. Johns County. Barzaga collected more than 200 bags of food, cleaning supplies and toiletries, and more than 100 new toys for the organization that provides transitional housing and supplies to families and children who’ve had significant challenges and are in crisis. “I know the difference they make in people’s lives,” said Barzaga, referencing the community support her family received when they came to the U.S. when she was a child. “The community helped us get settled and my mother made it her lifelong mission to help everyone needing shelter, starting over or getting resettled. She’s gone now, but I’m passionate about continuing her work.” DO YOU KNOW SOMEONE WHO DESERVES A BOUQUET? HOW ABOUT A BRICKBAT? Send submissions to mail@folioweekly.com; 50 word maximum, concerning a person, place, or topic of local interest. DECEMBER 13-19, 2017 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | 5
MIC DROP MIC SKILLZ ULTIMATE FREESTYLE BATTLE
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Watch Duval’s dopest MCs, up-and-comers and unknowns drop their best rhymes, brags and slights at the fifth annual Mic Skillz Ultimate Freestyle Battle, this year judged by Robin Bankz and Mr. Whitty. With a winner-take-all prize valued at more than a G, including two bones of ca$h money, a studio recording package and more, the stakes are high. Will there be a choke artist? Only one way to find out. 8 p.m.-2 a.m. Sat., Dec. 16 at Nighthawks, 2952 Roosevelt Blvd., Riverside, $8 advance, $10 at door, duvalhiphop.com.
OUR PICKS
REASONS TO LEAVE THE HOUSE THIS WEEK
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AT LAST, AN XMAS PUB CRAWL THAT BITES They could’ve gone with DeMarco or Jaime, but we’re
SOUNDS OF THE HART Prolific local author Timothy Gilmore’s newest novel, Pro
glad they went with Bill! (Eagles jerseys and serial killer shows aren’t our idea of festive, either.) Tug on your best elf costume and join the gang at Vagabond Coffee for Murray Hill Preservation Association’s A Very Murray Xmas Pub Crawl, featuring brews from Wicked Barley Brewing Company, and raffles and prizes for best elf-themed attire. Proceeds benefit Murray Hill Mural Project. 3-6 p.m. Sat., Dec. 16 at 934 Edgewood Ave. S., $5, murrayhilljax.com/events.
The Book of Isaiah: A Vision of the Founder of a City exa err examines Jacksonville’s notoriously complicated founder Isa Isaiah D. Hart, who stole slaves and resold them, then left part of his ill-gotten gains to the slave with whom he had children. The event, called Literature, Art, Music, c, fea features a reading by Gilmore, accompanied by Shep She Shepard’s music videos from the soundtrack and his aart.t 6-8 p.m. Thur., Dec. 14 at Chamblin’s Uptown, ar 2215 15 N. Laura St., Downtown, free, facebook.com/ eevents/284793172032188. ve
TOMORROW, WE LOVE YA! The Tony-winning musical ANNIE ran on Broadway forever, igniting the show biz careers of little red-headed girls for years. And now the warm-hearted story of a feisty-yetcheerful orphan who longs for a happy home of her own, starring locals Reagan Thomas and Bianca Pontello as Annie. Curtain at 8 p.m. Fri. & Sat., Dec. 15 & 16; 2 p.m. Sat. & Sun., Dec. 16 & 17, Northeast Florida Conservatory, Mandarin, $20, nfconservatory.org.
TRANS-SIBERIAN ORCHESTRA ANNUAL ROCK SHOW SPECTACLE
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This progressive rock ensemble is everywhere, often onstage twice a day, giving audiences a multimedia, music-and-laser, seasonal sensory overload. We get only one chance to experience the astounding spectacle of stage show, art, singers and musicians: TransSiberian Orchestra performs The Ghosts of Christmas Eve and The Best of TSO & More at 7:30 p.m. Dec. 14 at Veterans Memorial Arena, 300 Randolph Blvd., Downtown, 630-3900, $28.75-$62.75, ticketmaster.com.
DECEMBER 13-19, 2017 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | 7
FOLIO VOICES : FIGHTIN’ WORDS
HAIL
people usually spend a RARELY IS A COLUMN OF MINE single term in those ultraobsolete before the ink senior staff roles. dries—you usually have to Hughes, an alumnus wait until at least the weekend of Governor Rick Scott’s for that. comms staff and of at least But that was the case with one Congressional office, my column here last week, has been on the policy side which outlined how Florida before. But this is a new state Sen. Jack Latvala could animal: an apprenticeship deploy serious money against in local politics. candidates working with Curry is confident this Brian Hughes, Mayor Lenny will go without a hitch. Curry’s chief consultant. “Obviously through the Latvala is fighting for his BRIAN HUGHES: campaign, and then after political life; Hughes’ wife, Lenny Curry’s I got into office, we’ve had a senate staffer, went public a number of very public with accusations of serial gutsiest hire policy issues that we’ve sexual harassment in the worked on and successfully workplace against her. won, and he’s been a part As issues were being of that,” Curry told me dropped off at Folio Weekly last week. “I’ve been without a chief of staff advertisers and partners, the news went out: since May and I felt like it was time to bring Brian Hughes was in ... as Curry’s chief of staff. someone in, and he’s my guy.” This move was a long time coming. As Curry, of course, has no issue bringing far back as 2015, there was talk that Hughes people from the campaign side—especially was being looked at for a senior post in the out-of-area operatives (and one of their administration. However, that was said to be spouses)—over to the policy side. So far it’s controversial: Hughes had just run a nasty worked out fine. Curry is massively popular, campaign against Alvin Brown, and ended per polls, and good luck asking Democrats up outside the mayor’s staff, handling the if they even intend to field a real candidate political business. against him in 2019. Of course, that’s just an org chart. In reality, The closest thing they have to credible Hughes was there all along. competition, Garrett Dennis, has already said Kerri Stewart was brought in as chief of he’s running for City Council re-election. staff; the self-described moderate Republican And in the context of having no meaningful was a lauded hire outside the building, even opposition, moving Hughes to the policy shop as old questions about a Peyton-era purchase also makes sense for Curry, who will need of “consulting services” from a company she political capital and arm-twisting for certain went to work for arose. moves ahead. Those questions came to nothing; however, The JEA privatization scheme, specifically, word was that Stewart wasn’t fully on board is one that Curry and supporter/former JEA with the Curry agenda, at least not as much Board Chair Tom Petway like the sound of. as his political team thought she should be. But normal people are a harder sell. We’ve Stewart was gone in May, moving over to seen how it took Florida Power & Light another $200K-a-year job at JEA, and Chief weeks to get power restored down south Administrative Officer Sam Mousa took on after Hurricane Irma, and wonder if the her portfolio. well-lobbied utility has any real incentive to Not that people said much about it; improve on that front. Hughes will be able to Stewart was not seen as a particularly visible help sell this to the public and City Council. chief of staff. Worth noting: Virtually every reporter in Hughes, by contrast, will be so visible that they might as well put up a mural on the side this market has been cussed out by Hughes at of the St. James Building. He’s expected to be least once. It’s a rite of passage, and some don’t in everything, said one person close to him, forget. And there have been other interesting transcending the org chart. moments. One example: Hughes dissing Hughes passes the Sam Mousa test: Word former Florida Times-Union columnist is that he’s delighted to be working with Tonyaa Weathersbee when she tried to get Hughes, and it’s easy to see how Mousa and quotes from Curry after a debate, telling her Hughes will function in tandem—two blunt TV was more important. men prone to curse words and flashes of That said, the move made sense for Curry. And for Hughes, there likely was no better temper, pushing the mayor’s agenda. time for him to step over to the policy sphere. And that’s a big deal. Mousa won’t be in City A.G. Gancarski Hall forever. It’s hard to imagine Mousa staying mail@folioweekly.com much longer after the 2019 election, in part @AGGancarski because of the job demands, and in part because
TO THE
CHIEF
8 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | DECEMBER 13-19, 2017
NEWS AAND NOTES: WTF EDITION TOP HEADLINES FROM THE ASSOCIATION OF ALTERNATIVE NEWSMEDIA RAND PAUL ‘SHITS’ ON YOUR LAWN >
In 2017, the year that is a decade, there was an intensely interesting story about Senator Rand Paul getting attacked by his neighbor. This curious yarn unraveled on Nov. 3; afterward, no one could completely untangle it. Why on earth would a rich, white McMansion-dweller tackle another, a senator no less, breaking six, SIX of said senator’s ribs, then both parties zip their lips and leave us all to guess at the quarrel’s cause? Could it be something sinful? Illegal? Or worse … involving Pokémon Go? None of the above. Reportedly, it was a tiff over lawn trimmings. In the Chronogram, Larry Beinhart’s Body Politic notes that Paul ignited his neighbor’s ire blowing lawn trimmings across the property line. Beinhart went on, trying to make sense of a seemingly senseless situation, rationalizing that it was caused by Paul’s quintessentially Libertarian, conservative, Republican resistance to “the Golden Rule: ‘Thou shalt not dump your shit on your neighbor’s lawn.’” Be that shit lawn trimmings, or chemical runoff, or toxic waste, peeps like Paul prefer to let their poo run downhill to you.
< WAIT, IT’S WORSE TO BE A BUS DRIVER? The bus beats the shoe-leather express, but it’s not the preferred mode of transit for most of us. Complaining about the indignity of unassigned seating seems rather petty compared to the very real suffering experienced by some bus drivers. Minneapolis-based City Pages reveals that, after a year in which drivers were assaulted 73 times, the union is threatening to strike during the Super Bowl if Metro Transit doesn’t seriously address driver safety. Buses have surveillance and drivers are trained in deescalation tactics, but those aren’t always effective protecting drivers from ill-mannered souls, like the 18-year-old who threatened a female driver who’d asked him to stop swearing, then approached her, called her a “black bitch,” and kept swearing and yelling until she felt she had no choice but to pull over, City Pages reports. The union and Metro Transit are negotiating.
< DYING OF THIRST FOR FREEDOM The U.S./Mexico border in Arizona is so dry, corpses begin to mummify in less than a day. Such conditions make it exceptionally difficult to identify the dead, including scores of undocumented immigrants. “They don’t bloat. They don’t putrefy. They just desiccate and mummify. Getting prints from them is a difficult job,” Pat Wortheim, a former crime lab specialist who spent 20 years with the Arizona Department of Public Safety, told Fort Worth Weekly. Compounding the problem of IDing corpses, some undocumented immigrants carry papers with forged fingerprints. If they cannot be identified, they’re buried in pauper’s graves. This deeply affected Wortheim, who said to Fort Worth Weekly: I wondered about their families a lot. Their loved ones came to escape something terrible or looking for an opportunity. Did their families think their loved one was working or had found a better life and just forgot about them? I mean, they couldn’t have known they’d died, so they couldn’t have closure. The way we’re handling things now, it just has to change. It’s not right.
< BLACK MARKET DORWEEDOZ No, Folio Weekly has not been snacking on edibles … yet. #LegalizeIt. But we have been reading a story in the Illinois Times about a major “drug” bust in Springfield. Apparently, after receiving a tip that a West Cook Street resident was growing marijuana, police began investigating in July and, on Nov. 30—yes, that’s more than four months investigating a pot-growing operation—burst into an abandoned dry cleaner store, where they reportedly found a total of more than 950 plants and pounds of harvested weed. When the cops went to the suspect’s home on West Cook Street, to their surprise, they found 20 pounds of edibles, complete with packing material and labels in Zachary Pierson’s house and his mother’s house next door. The edibles, which Illinois Times says were made by spraying pot-infused oil onto food like potato chips, hot fries and cereal, included such goodies as Chronic Berries, Holdin’ Grams, Weedz-its and Dorweedoz. Pierson and suspected co-grower Scott Foster are being held on $200,000 bonds, charged with offenses ranging from conspiracy to illegal manufacture of marijuana, Illinois Times reports. Possession of small amounts of marijuana was decriminalized in Illinois in July 2016.
DECEMBER 13-19, 2017 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | 9
: NEWS FOLIO O O CO COMMUNITY U WS
EXCLUSIVE: FOLIO WEEKLY INTERVIEWS @SANMARCOTRAIN
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SINCE JOINING TWITTER IN APRIL, SAN MARCO TRAIN has earned the ire of an audience far from the standstill in San Marco. No matter how slowly it moves, San Marco Train seems to beat Northeast Floridians to the crossing all the livelong day. The list of locals who have succumbed to the loquacious locomotive is as long as the 5 o’clock train. As Folio Weekly owns the right-of-way to irreverence in the 904, and San Marco Train has parked its “resplendent”its word, not ours-caboose right in the middle of our turf, we monitored the situation from a safe distance on the Northbank, where the Train could not keep us from press conferences, laser light shows and handbell choir performances. For a time, we were content to watch from the roadside as the Train inched ever so slowly into the collective view. Truth be told, some of us delighted in the audacity of the “Train: Make America Late Again @SanMarcoTrain #MALA” signs placed at its infamous crossings, and took a perverse sort of pleasure in the Twitter battles inspired by the forced stillness which characterizes trips to San Marco.
But eventually we reached an impasse. First the Train declared war on FW, accusing us of the theft of its signs and of owning Scarface posters. Then it came after the editor. This was a bridge too far. The crossing had come down. We could no longer idle silently as the Train delighted in making the people of San Marco miss meetings, lunch dates, birthdays, kickoffs, colonoscopies, happy hours and children’s recitals. It was time for action. Utilizing sleuthing skills honed over years covering sneaks, cheats and, slipperiest of all, hipsters, we tracked down the Train wreaking truancy across San Marco and beyond. The Train was at once receptive and evasive. Patience paid off and the Train permitted our inspection of its machinations on the condition that we not disclose the location of the interview. We can say that it was conducted during rush hour somewhere along its daily track.
Train unrepentant, vows to MAKE AMERICA EVEN LATER AGAIN
10 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | DECEMBER 13-19, 2017
FW: Why did you join Twitter? San Marco Train: It’s where the people of San Marco post their most egregious criticisms of the most elegant and resplendent train.
Are there others like you? The movement, which is predicated on lack of movement, is growing. We’re all locomotivated to grow the cause. Why do you insist on Making America Late Again? San Marco is a beautiful neighborhood. We’re giving people more time to enjoy it. Should people be grateful to you? We think so. Bold Bean is in a kerfuffle over parking. Our mission is to turn San Marco into a parking lot. Problem solved. Some have suggested that your prowess at creating lateness is second only to Main Street Bridge. What do you say to that? That’s our Jill Stein. What’s your best side? The slowest one.
Steam, coal or electric? We run on honked horns, screamed expletives and the frustration of the people of San Marco, which is the greenest, greenest source. So you’re welcome, San Marco. Here’s your inconvenient truth. What’s your response to the people who cut around you by taking the bridge? We’ll find you. What’s your favorite song? “The Waiting” by Tom Petty & the Heartbreakers Skyway-friend or foe? Once they start delaying more, we can start engaging them in the Make America Late Again conversation. Frankly, they’re too efficient for our tastes. Claire Goforth claire@folioweekly.com
Crowning achievement of cunctation? When we happen to coincide with the school buses of San Marco. We work in tandem. Because you have to stop. It’s the law. Also, whenever we stop Melissa Ross from selling tote bags. Is there one that got away? The Great Train Robbery would have been fully absconding with our signs. By working overtime inconveniencing the people of San Marco, we were able to afford new signs. When will your mission be fulfilled? The day San Marco residents finally acknowledge resistance is futile. What’s your take on high-speed trains? What’s the point?
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an of DECEMBER 13-19, 2017 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | 11
THE DEAD BEAR
NO WITNESS What happened in the seconds before Keegan Von Roberts was shot? ONLY HIS KILLER KNOWS FOR SURE
STORY BY
CLAIRE GOFORTH
Two men quarrel in the night. They are neighbors, but neighborliness has not characterized their relationship of late. Tonight theyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re arguing about litter. Both carry guns. One gets shot. The trio of bullets punctures his chest, wrist, abdomen. He dies quickly, without having fired his weapon. The shooter quickly retreats to his home across the street. The wife, sitting in the passenger seat of the car next to where her husband falls and dies, does not see what happens in the crucial seconds before the shooting. The neighborhood is dense with CONTINUED NEXT PAGE >>>
12 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | DECEMBER 13-19, 2017
DECEMBER 13-19, 2017 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | 13
Keegan Von Roberts’ mother, Cecilia Shepard (left), and widow, Eliany Diaz Roberts
THE DEAD BEAR
NO WITNESS <<< FROM PREVIOUS houses, but it’s near midnight on a weeknight, and the night is dark. No eyewitnesses come forward; police and prosecutors are left to piece together what happened based on the widow’s statements, 911 calls by her, the shooter and a neighbor who heard the shots but says she saw nothing, and the tale told by the physical evidence. The wife’s 911 call is what one might expect—hysterical, griefstricken, horrified. She begs the operator to send help fast. “Please, can you hurry up, please … please, please.” She begs her husband not to die, “Baby, please wake up … baby, please hang in there.” The shooter’s call is more subdued. “I had a neighbor pull a gun on me. Send police and emergency personnel,” he says. Later, again, “He pulled a gun on me.” He says he doesn’t want to go outside because he’s fearful for his life. When police take him into custody, he invokes his right to counsel. The officer who transports him to the station writes in his report that while in the patrol car, he makes the following “spontaneous statements”: “I had to do it; he had a gun to my head. I had to shoot him.” Otherwise, he will not provide a statement on this night. Keegan Von Roberts, 22, is pronounced dead at the scene at 12:31 a.m. on Thursday, July 20, 2017. His body is taken to the medical 14 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | DECEMBER 13-19, 2017
Keegan Von Roberts, 22, is pronounced dead at the scene at 12:31 a.m. on Thursday, July 20, 2017. His body is taken to the medical examiner’s office. After five hours at the police station, his killer is released. HE IS NOT CHARGED WITH A CRIME. examiner’s office. After five hours at the police station, his killer is released. He is not charged with a crime. Thirty-three days later, police still have made no arrest. The family is getting restless; they’ve retained counsel. Some members of the public have been swept up into the event, calling it an outrage—a white man has shot a black man dead in front of his own home, they say, and he still walks free? Two detectives go to the killer’s house to take his statement. He reiterates that he had no choice,
that it was self-defense. The interview lasts less than an hour. The conversation is cordial. The killer complains that he has not slept well since the shooting, says that his life has been turned upside-down, that Roberts’ family and their attorney have been lying about him. He says he’s reluctant to talk. “Their story changes every day and it just makes their situation worse,” he says. “… Which is why I didn’t want to get my side of the story out there because I’m noticing every time they put their story out there, they look dumber.”
The detective who does most of the speaking comes across as sympathetic; he reassures the killer that neighbors have said nice things about him and says that he wants to get his side of the story to contradict some of what the family has been saying. He does not ask about several potential inconsistencies between the killer’s story and the physical evidence. He does not ask how closely the
CONTINUED NEXT PAGE >>>
DECEMBER 13-19, 2017 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | 15
The Roberts case has parallels to the Trayvon Martin case that extend beyond race. (Zimmerman, who is Latino, was widely reported to be white; Martin was black.) There, as here, THE KILLER HAD PROFILED HIS VICTIM AS BEING A CRIMINAL. THE DEAD BEAR
NO WITNESS <<< FROM PREVIOUS killer had been watching Roberts beforehand, though it is apparent in the interview that he had been watching very closely indeed. “Sometimes [detectives] can get more flies with honey, well, OK, I understand that logic, but you still have to ask the tough questions,” said John Phillips, who represents Roberts’ family in their wrongful death suit. “… The interview does read as if they’re seeking excuses.” Citing the length and volume of the questions FW submitted on Dec. 7, JSO indicated that it would not be possible to respond before press deadline. On the morning of Dec. 10, FW requested responses to three of its questions, one comprising two parts, by end of business Dec. 11. As of press time, JSO had not responded. Police do not arrest Michael Centanni IV, 26, on this day. (Though typically FW would not reveal the identity of someone who has not been charged with a crime, Centanni’s identity has previously been widely reported. Unable to obtain his phone number through numerous channels, on Dec. 10, FW knocked on Centanni’s door; when no one answered, a reporter left their business card, a letter identifying themselves and this outlet, which contained questions for Centanni, their deadline and contact information. Centanni did not respond.)
Six weeks later, Centanni is still free. Prosecutors assemble Roberts’ widow, Eliany Diaz Roberts (hence referred to as Diaz), his mother, Cecilia Shepard, and Phillips, to deliver the news: They are not pressing charges. They give a detailed presentation, complete with visual aid, in which the prosecutors lay out all the ways that the family would lose the case. Given the length of time that has passed, it cannot come as a complete surprise. Nevertheless, they are upset. They do not understand how a man can leave his house with a loaded gun, confront a neighbor and his pregnant wife in their car in front of the family home, kill him, and go free. That’s the law, is the explanation they are given. It does not help that their grief has been compounded in the interim: on Aug. 10, Roberts’ wife, then just five months pregnant, went into labor. The baby, a girl, did not survive. “She was in the palm of your hand,” Shepard said. “She was 365 grams.” She shows a reporter a photo of the tiny girl; Diaz blinks away tears and says she can’t bear to look. Prosecutors release a detailed disposition to the media explaining why they’re not pressing charges. In it, they claim that Diaz changed her story after the initial interview; that on Aug. 15 she told police “for the first time” that Centanni had previously used racial slurs to describe her Cuban family and her husband, that there was a delay between the second and third shots, and that Centanni taunted Roberts that night, saying, “You want to play?” (Centanni later tells police that he may have paused between the first and second shots to get a better grip
Evidence markers No. 2 and No. 3 indicate the locations of the shell casings believed to be from the bullets that killed Keegan Von Roberts. The shooter told police he fired from well on the other side of the road, across the sidewalk and a strip of grass separating it and the roadway.
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On the night of July 20, 2017, Michael Centanni IV taped this note and piece of plastic to the window while Roberts and his wife were sitting inside the vehicle. Centanni told police it wasn’t so much about the litter, but to let them know he was still watching. on the weapon and denies taunting Roberts.) An officer reports moving the weapon from beneath Roberts’ abdomen before the scene was photographed. The same officer has been accused of falsifying a report in the case of a woman whom video shows being battered by officers while handcuffed and in custody. Phillips represents the woman, Mayra Martinez. The State Attorney’s Office (SAO) also says Diaz offered additional information on Oct. 1, when she told them that her husband’s gun hadn’t been in the holster, but in his lap in the car, to explain why it ended up under his body. The disposition statement does not mention any inconsistencies between the evidence and Centanni’s statement. Citing the family’s impending wrongful death civil suit against Centanni, the SAO declined to answer FW’s questions. The disposition states that they “found no competent evidence” that Centanni was racist. It also appears to credit him for talking to police. “Importantly, Cetnanni’s [sic] voluntary statement was provided to the detectives on August 22, without knowing what, if any, evidence had been collected.” It notes that Centanni was a concealed weapons permit-holder, and says that in the event of a trial, Centanni could argue he was lawfully armed. Though Roberts also possessed a concealed weapons permit, the SAO says that marijuana found in the car and other evidence that points to him dealing the same precludes his lawful possession of a weapon. “Centanni would also assert that the reason he actually armed himself was because he knew Roberts to be an armed drug-dealer,” the report states. “The strong link between firearms and drug-dealing is inescapable.”
Phillips likens the disposition report to “a map to the defense.” “They’ve spent so much time building him up and tearing Eli [Diaz] down in this public document that they’ve made it virtually impossible for him to ever be prosecuted in a justice system where that’s not required.”
WHO IS ENTITLED TO STAND THEIR GROUND? THE STAND YOUR GROUND LAW REMOVES THE DUTY to retreat before using deadly force. To invoke it, one must be legally entitled to be in the place where they utilize such force. Many have complained that stand your ground effectively removes the burden of proving self-defense from the accused and requires prosecutors to prove before trial that a killing was not justified. Prosecutors have said that this makes their jobs more difficult and allows people to kill with impunity. George Zimmerman famously claimed that his 2012 killing of Trayvon Martin was justified under
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THE DEAD BEAR
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Centanni told police that shell casings from
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his gun should have landed near “this arrow,”
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adjacent to his driveway. Shell casings believed
stand your ground. Though he did not deny targeting, following and killing Martin, an unarmed teenager, Zimmerman was acquitted of murder. Though prosecutors say this is a case of self-defense, Roberts’ family is not convinced. To them and to others—such as the more than 50,000 people who signed a petition asking the SAO to charge Centanni—this is a stand your ground case. To them, this is a miscarriage of justice, of one man becoming fixated on another, initiating a confrontation, escalating it, killing his target, and hiding behind the law and the fact that the only person other than Centanni who knows precisely what happened is dead. And the dead cannot speak. The Roberts case has parallels to the Martin case that extend beyond race. (Zimmerman, who is Latino, was widely reported to be white; Martin was black.) There, as here, the killer had profiled his victim as being a criminal. Zimmerman thought Martin was a thief; Centanni suspected Roberts of being a drug dealer. Neither killer was a member of law enforcement, but both may have had aspirations to become such—Zimmerman was part of a neighborhood watch and criminal justice student, Centanni also studies criminal justice, perhaps intending to follow in the footsteps of his stepfather, a police sergeant. There, as here, the only living eyewitness is the killer. There are a few key differences between the cases, however. For one, both Centanni and Roberts were armed. The location of the shooting may also differ. Neither Zimmerman nor Martin was on their own property; Centanni claims the same. He told detectives that he was at least halfway across the street when he heard Roberts exit the vehicle. He said he turned around and saw a gun pointed at him. “I know that at one point he was in the street with me … his gun was so close to me I was able to hit it,” he said to detectives. He said that after slapping the gun away, he drew his own handgun from a makeshift pocket holster and quickly fired three times, hitting Roberts each time. If true, he would
to be from Centanni’s weapon were found in the
presumably the one police painted on the road
yard several feet from the white SUV at right.
have been in the street when he fired. The evidence indicates close proximity; the ME found gunpowder stippling and bullet wipe around the entrance wound of the bullet that penetrated Roberts’ lung and perforated his right pulmonary artery, killing him, which indicates the weapon was likely fired within a few feet at most. The location of Roberts’ body in police photos appears inconsistent with the shooting occurring in the road, as Centanni asserts. Photos show Roberts’ body right next to the SUV he was driving, partially on the sidewalk, but mostly in the grass on the property line between his and the neighboring house. Separating the sidewalk and the road is another strip of grass roughly two feet wide. There is a small amount of blood on the sidewalk beside him, but most is beneath and on Roberts. Nowhere in the police files FW reviewed, nor in the SAO’s disposition, does it state that his body was moved before being photographed. Centanni told police that Roberts fell immediately upon being shot, saying, “I’m basically running backwards while shooting, he’s falling backwards.” Detectives did not ask Centanni about this discrepancy; nor does the SAO disposition mention it. Diaz told police that Centanni shot Roberts next to the car after a brief scuffle at the rear of the vehicle. When the detective asked, Centanni denied arguing with Roberts outside the vehicle prior to shooting him. Centanni does not appear to be injured in either police photos or video from the station that night; the ME’s report does not reference injuries on Roberts other than the gunshot wounds. Further, police recovered two .40 caliber shell casings from the scene, believed to be from Centanni’s gun—both were in the grass northeast of Roberts’ feet. Spent gun casing trajectories vary widely, and depend on numerous factors. But when
detectives asked Centanni where, based on his experience with the weapon, the casings should’ve fallen, Centanni, after saying that he hadn’t fired that gun in a long time, guessed that they would have fallen in the road. “If I’m right here, they would probably be somewhere by this arrow,” he said, adding that the road slopes, so the casings could’ve rolled downhill. As it is an audio recording, it is not clear where he was indicating, but Centanni had previously asked about the arrow police painted on the road right next to his driveway to assist with aerial photography and review of the images. The casings were on the other side of the road, the strip of grass and the sidewalk, in the yard by Roberts’ feet. Detectives did not ask Centanni about this potential discrepancy; nor does the SAO disposition mention it. “The shell casings and the body and the bullet trajectories are inconsistent with him firing from a public place,” said Phillips. “He was on the grass and they kind of let that fly.”
“BUILDING THE MOUNTAIN” DIAZ AND CENTANNI DISAGREE ON MANY POINTS, but both do agree that, after weeks of silently escalating tensions between the men, Centanni approached Diaz’s mother, with whom Roberts, Diaz, and their 2-year-old daughter lived, along with her stepfather, and accused Roberts of selling drugs. “I told Keegan and Keegan felt a certain kind of way,” Diaz told FW, “’Cause he’s a man, Keegan’s a man, he could’ve came and talked to him personally.” She says she told Roberts to stop having people come by the house. “For a while, he would drive down to the O’Reilly’s or to the park to do his thing,” Centanni told detectives. O’Reilly Auto Parts is nearly a half-mile away; the closest park is roughly the same distance in the opposite direction. Neither is within line of sight, but detectives did not ask how he knew this. Centanni told detectives that eventually, Roberts resumed having customers come by the house. Around midnight on July 4, Roberts and a second man spotted Centanni taking
On Oct. 2, prosecutors gave Roberts’ family and their attorney, John M. Phillips, who represents them in their wrongful death suit against Centanni, a presentation explaining all the reasons they’d lose at trial.
a picture of the latter’s license plate. (Diaz told FW this happened about a week after the prior incident.) Roberts confronted him. The two exchanged words. Centanni told detectives that he cautioned Roberts. “I’m not trying to get the police involved and take you away from your family.” Early in the interview, he said that Roberts lifted his shirt to reveal a gun tucked into his waistband; later he said that Roberts pointed it at him. Detectives did not ask him about the discrepancy. Centanni also told them he said to Roberts, “Nobody needs to die over this.” Centanni told detectives he called his stepfather, who advised him to report it, so he called police. He also reported his suspicions about Roberts’ drug-dealing. “[I] gave a slew of license plates I’d been taking down,” he said. Shepard said afterward, her son told her that he had his “first enemy,” and she urged him to move his family in with her. Roberts refused. “I said, ‘Do I need to say something to him?’” she said. “… He said, ‘No, I just ignore him.’” Both Shepard and Diaz say that Roberts preferred to avoid conflict. Like Centanni has been characterized, those who knew Roberts describe him as friendly and polite. Centanni told police he stopped speaking with Roberts after the incident and that, subsequently, their interactions were “just notes.” But he kept watching. “Apparently he was logging every tag that came through,” Phillips said, adding that he believes Centanni was “infatuated with this family,” which speaks to his frame of mind that night. “That’s not a useless fact; that shows a level of kind of building the mountain that added to the crescendo of what happened July 20,” he said. Centanni told police that he saw Roberts throw a piece of trash on the ground the day before the shooting; the morning of July 20, it had blown into his yard. So he wrote on it, “Pick up your trash neighbor,” and put it back in Roberts’ yard. He says he later found it back in his yard. So he wrote another note and waited. But he told detectives the issue really wasn’t about litter. “It wasn’t as big a deal about trash. All over trash. That note was to let him know I’m still alert, watching what he’s doing.”
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THE DEAD BEAR
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DATE NIGHT TURNED DEADLY JULY 20 WAS SUPPOSED TO BE SPECIAL FOR THE couple who’d been high school sweethearts. “They were just two young kids in love, madly in love,” Shepard said. Together since 2010 and married since 2013, a few months after both graduated from Englewood High School, this was their first full night without their daughter since she had been born. They’d dropped the toddler off with Shepard, then gone to The Jacksonville Landing and strolled the Riverwalk. Diaz said that staring at the swirling surface of the St. Johns River made her husband feel sick, so they went home so he could use the bathroom. They parked the car and were sitting there talking when someone knocked on the window. It was Centanni. “He walked to Keegan’s driver’s side window and looked us both in the eye and is waving this little piece of plastic,” Diaz said. She said that Roberts opened the door because the window didn’t roll down— Centanni contests this, telling detectives that the window did roll down—and asked him what he was doing out there this time of night. She told FW he said, “I’m tired of you leaving this trash, trashing my neighborhood,” and that her husband told him to go away and leave them alone, then shut the door. Centanni, she said, didn’t budge.
Roberts’ family (below) hasn’t completely processed their loss. For a long time after his death, his daughter would run to the window whenever she saw headlights, calling for Papa. “It’s unbelievable. I still wait for Keegan to come through the door,” said Shepard, his mother. The memorial at right marks the spot where he died.
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“Michael’s still standing there staring at us,” she said. She said that Roberts opened the door a second time, told him to go away, then shut it again. In Centanni’s interview with police, he said that he didn’t realize anyone was in the car when he walked over, intending to tape the plastic and second note to the window. Once he saw them inside, he decided to go through with it anyway. “What am I going to walk up, look like a weirdo, walk away?” he said. When Roberts either rolled up the window or shut the door, Centanni taped the note to the driver’s side window, right at eye level. Diaz said Roberts immediately got out of the car. Centanni said that he was at least halfway across the street by the time Roberts exited the vehicle. She says they exchanged words, then she heard shots. Centanni says that the moment he turned around, Roberts had a gun in his face. He also said that Diaz came at him with a sword. She says he lied, telling FW, “I told everybody, I told the cops, if I would’ve pulled a sword out on him, I would’ve used it.” Police did recover large knives that could be described as swords from the car; nowhere do police reports state that Diaz was armed with a sword or anything else when they arrived.
Though he took a loaded weapon with one in the chamber—the way he always keeps his guns, Centanni said in his statement—he said he didn’t intend to confront them. “What I’m trying to relay to you is, no, I didn’t go over there for a confrontation, I went over there to leave a note on the vehicle,” he said. “After there was a confrontation, I ended this confrontation.”
ARMED AND DANGEROUS THE TRAYVON MARTIN CASE CAUSED INCREASED scrutiny on stand your ground cases nationwide. Florida was the first state to pass such a law in 2005; the targeting and killing of the unarmed teen fit almost precisely with the worst-case scenario predicted by opponents. In a 2012 story about four such cases, CNN cited a 2007 study commissioned by the National District Attorneys Association. The study found that police and prosecutors were concerned that stand your ground laws could lead to what it called “an increasingly armed and trigger-happy citizenry.” “Stand your ground is a solution looking for a problem, and this is one of those cases,” said Phillips.
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THE DEAD BEAR
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As a Navy veteran and stepson of a cop, it’s not surprising that Centanni is a weapons enthusiast. Police photos from inside his home and vehicle show gun, after gun, after gun, spent shell casings, bullets—some boxed, others not—of various calibers, and other tools of violence. Photos show a holster mounted just beneath the ignition in his truck, as well as two axes, one with an elongated handle, behind the seat; in his bedroom, an assault rifle leans against the wall next to the bed. A pile of gun enthusiast magazines is stacked on a living room table. The SAO disposition states that he has no criminal record; his military record includes a reported battery on a fellow servicemember, but Centanni wasn’t disciplined and ultimately received an honorable discharge. FW found no evidence that anyone other than Centanni has accused Roberts of violence. By all accounts, Centanni and Diaz’s parents were on good terms before Roberts, his wife and child moved in with them. He’d help her stepfather out, working on cars from time to time; Centanni told police he’d also given them rides to work. Phillips and Roberts’ family believe that when Roberts moved in and Centanni started noticing what he assumed was drug activity, he began an extrajudicial investigation. In Centanni’s statement, he said he was concerned that Roberts was putting others in the neighborhood in jeopardy. “It’s only going to take one strung-out idiot to come over there without drug money who’s going to try to rob him of his drugs … [and] hit one of the kids,” he said. Since July 20, Centanni has called police on his neighbors at least twice; once, on Veterans Day, when a reporter observed two officers respond to his home during an early morning prayer vigil for Roberts. In his 911 call, Centanni says that chants of “justice or else” led him to fear for his safety, construing “or else” as a threat to him. Phillips told FW that on Dec. 8, he called police on a process server parked at Diaz’s house. Though Centanni claims otherwise, Roberts’ family and attorney believe that he intended to pick a fight that night. Otherwise, they wonder, why did he wait for them to return before leaving the second note? And after he saw that the car was occupied, why did he knock on the window, particularly if he was, as he previously claimed, afraid of Roberts? What was his frame of mind? Was he intoxicated? Police photos from that night show empty beer cans in his house. Diaz said that he’s drunk “all the time.” Police performed no toxicology test on him that night, nor did detectives ask if he’d been drinking. Intoxication could call into question the reasonableness of Centanni’s perception of a threat. The ME report states that Roberts had marijuana and opiates in his system; police reports state that there was a strong smell of marijuana in his car. Roberts’ family also believes that law enforcement has given Centanni preferential treatment, while treating Roberts and Diaz like suspects. They believe police failed to thoroughly investigate whether Centanni targeted Roberts, or if his knowledge of the law gave him unique understanding of the elements of self-defense. In his statement, Centanni mentioned that he turned to his
stepfather for advice after the shooting. “He actually worked homicide and narcotics and all the stuff, he’s been pretty helpful,” he said, referencing the killing. Detectives did not ask what advice his stepfather gave him. Many have wondered whether race was a factor in the investigation. “Based upon the facts, I can’t take race out of the equation,” Phillips said. “… The other side of it is, black male who sold pot versus white veteran who wrapped himself around the second amendment and the flag.” A 2015 study published in the journal Social Science and Medicine that examined 204 stand your ground cases in Florida found that, after accounting for variables, defendants were twice as likely to be convicted if their victim was white, compared to if the victim was nonwhite. “These results are similar to pre-civil rights era statistics, with strict enforcement for crimes when the victim was white and less-rigorous enforcement with the victim is nonwhite,” the researchers wrote. The night of the shooting, police put Diaz in the back of a patrol car where she couldn’t see what was happening with her husband. She told FW that when medical personnel rolled a gurney away without Roberts on it, she started screaming and punching the window; she says an officer then threatened to arrest her. Subsequently, she was taken to the station, where she was interviewed for hours, she says, until seven o’clock in the morning, going over and over what happened—much of it without being told whether her husband had survived. Centanni was released just after seven a.m. Meanwhile, officers were busy collecting evidence from both their cars and residences. Diaz said someone put a search consent form in front of her at the station, telling her they needed to see her husband’s gun box. She signed it, thinking that was all they wanted. “When I get home, my room is completely upside-down. They pulled the drawers out, everything from underneath the bed … they just wrecked my entire room,” she said. Phillips believes that law enforcement may be using evidence from this case to go after others associated with Roberts, and wonders whether the evidence of him selling marijuana may have influenced the investigation. “Now you’re using a dead guy to prosecute up the chain for a drug deal?” he said. “… I have problems with that.” Among the 900 photos in the police file that FW reviewed for this story are images from Roberts’ SUV and bedroom, showing marijuana, paraphernalia for smoking marijuana, digital scales, baggies, a book on growing marijuana, blunts and cash. Just over a pound of marijuana was found in their car. But Roberts selling pot does not justify Centanni’s conduct, Phillips says. He says Centanni had no authority to investigate his neighbor, and that, depending on the level of his fixation, his actions could rise to criminal stalking. He believes Centanni should have been charged. “This to me is a manslaughter case with murder potential if there was a level of premeditation,” he said. ONLY TWO PEOPLE COULD HAVE KNOWN WHAT happened in the seconds leading up the deadly shooting on the Southside on the night of July 20, 2017. And one of those people, Keegan Von Roberts, is dead. “No independent eyewitnesses to the shooting exist,” the SAO’s disposition reads. “There is no surveillance video that captured the shooting. We are left with what Centanni said happened and what the physical evidence shows.” Claire Goforth claire@folioweekly.com
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FOLIO A + E
INTERNAL
SYNCHRONICITY Juan Fontanive’s Project Atrium installation is a COLORFUL DANCE of temporal relations
B
rrooklyn-based rook ro oookklynlyynn---bba baseed ar aartist tiistt JJuan uan ua an Fontanive has always been handy. When he was a child growing up in Cleveland, Fontanive’s parents were career artists (his mother Jacqueline is a portrait and mural artist, his father Juan an abstract painter) who filled the family’s home with old objects, some of them mechanized. “Stuff would break and we just had to fix it ourselves,” Fontanive says of those early days. “I got comfortable with my hands, and I gained a lot of confidence that I could figure out something complex once I took it apart.” That confidence, along with Fontanive’s keen eye for design, is on display in a new Project Atrium installation, Movement 4, at the Museum of Contemporary Art Jacksonville. Descending from the ceiling–roughly 40 feet above the ground floor–Fontanive’s assemblage of pulleys, springs, timing belts, gears and rotating rods made from hundreds of feet of steel, performs an alluring, colorful dance of synchronicity. The piece can give the viewer the feel of taking in a bird’s-eye view of a bustling
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NNew Ne ew Yo York rk CCity itity st ity stre tre reeett ccorner–a orne orne or ner– r–aa harm hharmonious ha arm mon onio ioouuss street intersection of order and chaos–as every few seconds, dozens of colored disks flip and chime. The multilevel kinetic installation is Fontanive’s largest to date and it’s his first solo exhibition in a major museum. “We hope viewers will be mystified by its complex systems,” said MOCAJax Curator Jaime DeSimone. “Fontanive’s practice–part sculptural and part mechanical–expands the lineage of the Project Atrium series. [It’s] the first time a kinetic sculpture [has been] featured in the cavernous Atrium Gallery.” Fontanive cultivated a keen eye for design and mechanizations while studying at the Royal College of Art, London. The constant bustle and commotion there, as well as the city’s eclectic vintage markets, proved to be deep wells of inspiration. Fontanive had been working with moving images, rigging flipbooks with hundreds of pages of images on continuous loops. “I would go to the markets on the East End, and collect a lot of old things and found objects for my sculptures,”
FILM Three Rare Noir Flicks FILM The Disaster Artist Review MUSIC Reverend Horton Heat ARTS Brighter2gether LIVE + LOCAL MUSIC CALENDAR
he said. “I would buy old clocks for a pound. Many of them were at least 100 years old. I talked a lot to clockmakers and craftsmen and I began taking [the cclocks] cl l apart, putting them back together aand using them in my work. That was a bbig influence, just to see how things w were made.” While Fontanive’s ingenuity is everppresent in his artwork, there is whimsical uurbanity to both his sculpture work and kki i kinetic art installations. Now a resident ooff New York City, Fontanive says he’s witnessed his share of urban processions. “The city in general is a big influence on my work,” he said. “Both in New York and London, going through the streets, just seeing things moving, looking into shop windows and seeing people setting things up, there’s so much movement.” And though Fontanive draws inspiration and stimulation from the complexity of urban activity, he’s similarly inspired by the temporal relationships he’s witnessed in the natural world. “I have a Vespa that I drive in Manhattan. Often it feels like you’re part of a school of fish,” he said. “You get into this flow of everything moving around you and become more instinctual with how you drive. There definitely seems to be an internal synchronicity to both cities and nature.” Fontanive’s Movement 4 began with a MOCAJax site visit, when the vast scale of the installation became evident. “The scale of the space was something I thought a lot about. It’s very vertical,” he said. “It’s so high, 40 feet or something. Sometimes the work needs to find its right size and I think in that room it did.” Scaling Movement 4 was just one piece of a complex puzzle, however, as Fontanive, over the course of the two-week
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installation, affixed dozens of pulleys to nearly 300 timing belts, all controlled by a high-torque motor. To avoid friction within the machinations, Fontanive has the pulleys moving across bearings. The resulting installation–a rich tapestry of colored disks attached to twirling rods and marching belts–executes its choreography in virtual silence, save for a regular chiming, as the disks flip, 180 degrees, from colored to white. “I used a mechanical stop so that the when the disks flip, they don’t bounce, but instead stop nearly outright,” Fontanive said of his installation’s most striking element. “It doesn’t stop it perfectly, but it slows it down. That creates the sound that resonates off the disk and the rod in between. They’re stainless steel, so it makes a specific sound.” One would imagine such an intricately designed piece, with multiplex movements and materials, requires a great deal of preparation. But Juan Fontanive’s creative process is somewhat analogous to his work. Like a pedestrian approaching a succession of Manhattan intersections, Fontanive knows that such apparent synchronicity requires a fair amount of improvisation. “I leave a lot of my process to trialand-error,” he said. “Working with the materials, trying different mechanisms, my goal is just to make things work with each other.” Matthew B. Shaw mail@folioweekly.com JUAN FONTANIVE’S MOVEMENT 4
On display through Feb. 18, Museum of Contemporary Art Jacksonville, 333 N. Laura St., Downtown, mocajacksonville.unf.edu
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ARTS + EVENTS PERFORMANCE
AMAHL & THE NIGHT VISITORS EMMA Concert Association presents Gian Carlo Menotti’s poignant opera, staged here as a sing-along, part of Holiday Traditions with First Coast Opera, 7:30 p.m. Dec. 13 at Flagler College’s Lewis Auditorium, 14 Granada St., St. Augustine, 797-2800, $40, emmaconcerts.com. LOVE’S LABOUR’S LOST Director JaMario Stills thinks LLL is one of the Bard’s most successful and relevant plays. Phase Eight mounts the play 8 p.m. Dec. 14, 15 & 16, and 2 p.m. Dec. 16 at WJCT Studios, Northbank, $15, 904tix.com. JOSEPH & THE AMAZING TECHNICOLOR DREAMCOAT A tale of wardrobe magic and family tricks. 8 p.m. Dec. 13, 14, 15, 20, 21, 22; 2 & 8 p.m. Dec. 16 & 23; 2 p.m. Dec. 17 at Players by The Sea, 106 N. Sixth St., Jax Beach, $25-$28, 249-0289, playerbythesea.org. CHRISTMAS CAROL Bruce Allen Scudder’s holiday show adds humor and music to the bleak story of Ebenezer Scrooge. And Tod Booth is Scrooge! 7:50 p.m. Dec. 14-17 & 19-24, 1:15 p.m. Dec. 13, 16, 20 & 23; 1:50 p.m. Dec. 17 & 24 at Alhambra Theatre & Dining, 12000 Beach Blvd., Southside, $49.95-$57, 641-1212, alhambrajax.com. THE SANTALAND DIARIES Apex Theatre Studio presents David Sedaris’ one-act comedy about his seasonal job (and misadventures) at Macy’s–as one of Santa’s elves. This hilarious show, with mature content and language, with musical guest Duffy Bishop at 8 p.m., is staged 8:30 p.m. Dec. 15 & 16 at Ponte Vedra Concert Hall, 1050 A1A N., 209-0367, $20 reserved seating; pvconcerthall.com. TRANS-SIBERIAN ORCHESTRA Multimedia, music-and-laser, seasonal overload Trans-Siberian Orchestra performs 7:30 p.m. Dec. 14 at Veterans Memorial Arena, 300 Randolph Blvd., Downtown, 630-3900, call for prices, jaxevents.com. ANNIE Tony-winning Broadway musical about our favorite redheaded orphan is staged through Dec. 17 at Northeast Florida Conservatory, 11363 San Jose Blvd., Mandarin, $20, nfconservatory.org. THE ULTIMATE CHRISTMAS SHOW The Annual Holiday Variety Show & Christmas Pageant at St. Everybody’s NonDenominational Universalist Church is here! A heartwarming tale staged 8 p.m. Dec. 15, 16, 22 & 23; 2 p.m. Dec. 17 at 716 Ocean Blvd., Atlantic Beach; 249-7177, abettheatre.com. HIR Isaac, back from war to take care of his ailing father, finds a household in revolt. The insurgent: Mom. Staged 8 p.m. Dec. 15 & 16; 2 p.m. Dec. 17 at The 5 & Dime, A Theatre Company, 112 E. Adams St., 637-5100, $17, Downtown, the5anddime.org. TGIF WITH MIKE SHACKELFORD The remedy for lunchtime blues: Listen to the renowned local singer/songwriter Shackelford put his own spin on tunes and you’ll want to sing along, 11:30 a.m.-2 p.m. Dec. 15 at Hemming Park, 135 W. Monroe St., Downtown, 515-5098, free, hemmingpark.org. THE BEST CHRISTMAS PAGEANT EVER Apex Theatre Studio presents the comedy about the six Herdman wild child sibs who go to church because they heard snacks were free; somehow they get cast in an annual church program, even though they know nothing of the baby Jesus or any of the rest of it. Lessons are learned, hearts are warmed. Shows are 1 and 6 p.m. Dec. 16 and 2 p.m. Dec. 17 at Apex Theatre Studio (in Ponte Vedra Concert Hall), 1050 A1A N., $15, apextheatrejax.com.
COOL SIDE OF YULETIDE The Jacksonville Children’s Chorus performs its holiday concert at 2 and 5 p.m. Dec. 16 at Hendricks Avenue Baptist Church , 4001 Hendricks Ave., San Marco, 353-1636, $21, jaxchildrenschorus.org. SONGWRITERS’ CONCERT Mike Shackelford hosts local musicians as they perform 6-8 p.m. Dec. 17 at Adele Grage Theater, 716 Ocean Blvd., Atlantic Beach, free; alcohol-free, 247-5828, coab.us. THE BOOK OF ISAIAH Tim Gilmore reads from his new novel, The Book of Isaiah: A Vision of the Founder of a City, as Sam Shepard’s art and music videos accompany his presentation, 6-8 p.m. Dec. 14 at Chamblin’s Uptown, 215 N. Laura St., Downtown, 674-0868, chamblinbookmine.com. CHRISTMAS WONDERLAND Glittering costuming, highkicking chorus girls and favorite holiday songs are featured at this spectacular show, 7:30 p.m. Dec. 17 at Times-Union Center for the Performing Arts’ Moran Theater, 300 Water St., Downtown, 633-6110, $27-$63, fscjartistseries.org.
CLASSICAL + JAZZ
ST. AUGUSTINE COMMUNITY CHORUS The Youth Chorus joins the Chorus, directed by Mike Sanflippo, performing From Prophecy to Peace, 7:30 p.m. Dec. 16 and 2 p.m. Dec. 17 at Cathedral Basilica of St. Augustine, 38 Cathedral Place, 824-2806, $20 advance; $25 at door, $5 students, ID’ed military; staugustinecommunitychorus.org. THE TEN TENORS This decuplet performs holiday favorites, 8 p.m. Dec. 20 at The Florida Theatre, 128 E. Forsyth St., Downtown, $35-$65, 355-2787, floridatheatre.com. MATTHEW HALL The pianist performs every Thur., Fri. & Sat. at Corner Bistro/Glass Hat Piano Bar & Grill, 9823 Tapestry Park Cir., Southside, 619-1931.
COMEDY
COMEDIAN ROZ McCOY–a local gal and U.S. Navy retiree— appears 8 p.m. Dec. 14. Ex-truck driver Julie Scoggins, a charming Southerner, shares her … um … colorful humor 7:30 p.m. Dec. 15; $16-$23. Mr. Mince Birthday Bash with Julie Scoggins, Chello Davis, Antwan Murphy and DJ Bennie Blade, starts 8 p.m. Dec. 16; R-rated; $20-$35. Phatt Jax Tues with DJ Bennie Blade, 6 p.m. every Tue., check website for details. It’s all at The Comedy Club of Jacksonville, 11000 Beach Blvd., Southside, 646-4277, $20-$30, jacksonvillecomedy.com. CORAZON COMEDY FESTIVAL Sareth Ney hosts Casey Bryant Crawford, Benjamin Brainard, Jon Durnell, Jessie Pawlish, The Improv Adventure, It’s All About Amy, The Weirdball Podcast and many more, plus a screening of Guffpunch. The hilarity runs 11:30 a.m.-9:30 p.m. Dec. 17 at The Corazon Cinema & Cafe, 36 Granada St., St. Augustine, 679-5736; $10; $5 students, ID’ed military; corazoncinemaandcafe.com. SPANKY BROWN The ubiquitous Mr. Brown is on 7:30 p.m. Dec. 13, 14, 20 & 21; 8:30 p.m. Dec. 15 & 22; 8 & 9:45 p.m. Dec. 16 & 23 at The Comedy Zone, 3130 Hartley Rd., Mandarin, $15-$18, 292-4242, comedyzone.com. Russ Nagel is in on Dec. 28, 29 & 30.
CALLS & WORKSHOPS
JURIED ARTIST MEMBERS EXHIBITION 2018 The Cultural Center at Ponte Vedra Beach opens entries for JAME to its
HOLIDAYS ON POINTE
One of the many holiday habits we must endure (and secretly love), FIRST COAST NUTCRACKER, with its dancing rat kings and sugar plum fairies (need we say more?), is staged 8 p.m. Dec. 15, 2 and 8 p.m. Dec. 16 and 2 p.m. Dec. 17 at T-U Center’s Moran Theater, $20-$54, jaxsymphony.org.
28 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | DECEMBER 13-19, 2017
FOLIO A+E : MAGIC LANTERNS
P
ublic domain is a vast morass into which, over decades, films without copyright or ownership fall. Before home video was available to the masses, many movies played over and over on TV; original prints butchered in lieu of ads. The good news? Three movies—Orson Welles’ The Stranger (1946), Phil Karlson’s Kansas City Confidential (’52) and James Whale’s The Old Dark House (’32)—have been restored in hi-def; two excellent features by cinematic masters; the third’s a film noir gem. The Stranger may be familiar to most folks, despite its footnote status in Welles’ filmography, when compared to masterpieces like Citizen Kane, The Magnificent Seven and Touch of Evil. One reason for its early disregard was critical snobbishness. A guileless noir thriller ruthless hrillerr about ab ex-Nazi Charles Rankin kin (Welles) (Wellles es)) posing posi sing ingg as a professor in a New w England town, married ed d to local beauty Mary (Loretta oretta or ta Young), The Stranger may mayy be the director’s mostt conventional film. It’s alsoo the only one to make a pro profi ofi fitt when first released. It’s’s said s id sa Welles didn’t like it, but ut audiences aud udie ienc n es did. did. id d Now, 70 years on, the critics do, do, too. Rescued from the abyss by filmmaker Curtis Harrington (Night Tide, Queen of Blood), The Old Dark House is spectacular in its new look from Cohen Film Collection. Directed by James Whale a year after his Frankenstein made Boris Karloff a star, the gothic comedy/thriller was adapted from J.B. Priestley’s novel about, well, an old dark house, its weird inhabitants, and five luckless travelers seeking shelter one dark and stormy night. Running a snappy 72 minutes, House is a delightful bounty for early horror fans, especially Whale film fans. Impressive set designs and smart use of
miniatures show real craftsmanship. In a short 11-year career, Whale directed three other genuine classics—The Invisible Man (’33), Bride of Frankenstein (’35) and Showboat (’36). The engaging House cast—headlined by Karloff as a menacing mute with no lines— included Raymond Massey, Charles Laughton, Ernest Thesiger and Melvyn Douglas. Thesiger was immortalized as Doctor Pretorius in Whale’s Bride of Frankenstein. Future Oscar-winners Laughton and Douglas were starting long careers. Massey, who got an Oscar nod for Abe Lincoln in Illinois (’41), was a distinguished face in American and British films for 40 more years. Among the House ladies, Gloria Stuart may be the most known; her only Oscar nod was 55 years later, when she was 87. We know her her as llovely centenarian Rose, wearing Thee Hear Heart wear we arin i g Th in T rt of o the Ocean diamond. The Titanic. T e film? Th fil The gorgeous black-andwhite set includes white restoration r commentaries and fascinating comm additional additio material, like an iinterview with Karloff ’s ntee daughter da ht Sara, who says when daugh he had ad the breakthrough role rolle ro le in in Frankenstein, Franke Fr kens nsttein, he’ h d already been in 80 films. Harrington lms. Har arri rington tells tell of his fondness of the film and Whale and hilariously dismisses the preposterous attempt by contemporary “queer criticism” to read a homosexual subtext in Bride of Frankenstein, among other Whale classics. Director Phil Karlson racked up more than 60 credits from 1944-’73. His most successful was ’73’s Walking Tall, but his best ones were made in the ’50s; to wit: Kansas City Confidential. A cleverly plotted, convoluted tale of a bank robbery, a frame-up and a vengeful ex-con, the movie stars John Payne as noir hero Joe, trailing three bad guys; each became famed character actors (usually villains)—Jack Elam, Lee Van Cleef and Neville Brand. Van Cleef is especially fun to watch playing a ladies’ man—years later, he snarled in spaghetti Westerns. With several scenes enhanced in usual noir style by tight, careful framing, Kansas City Confidential deserves a better rep. This restored print will help further that cause. These films might be oldies, but they’re most definitely goodies. Pat McLeod mail@folioweekly.com
OVERSET
Revived cinematic trio comprises UNDERAPPRECIATED CLASSICS
THE DARK ART OF
RESTORATION
DECEMBER 13-19, 2017 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | 29
FOLIO A+E : ARTS Glamorous Resolutions abound in A NEW STAGING of Shakespeare’s Love’s Labour’s Lost
BOOGIE WONDERLAND J
the Princess of France and her ladies-in-waiting, aMario Stills always seems to be in love, intrigue and poetry ensue. a thoughtful kind of motion; his When he was deciding how to stage the love of—and dedication to—theater, play, Stills said that he was listening to a lot palpable. As the artistic director of Phase of music, and so began toying with the idea Eight, a regional repertory theater company of conceptualizing the play against a ’70s that takes as its core mission both cultural and backdrop. “I was developing a soundscape of economic enrichment, “… we talk about being what this play could be,” he explained. an organization that speaks to all voices,” his So he and musician Cory Driscoll—who activity is necessitated by the demands of his plays Armado, a lesser sycophant—sat down to craft as well as the reality of working within hash out the music, as filtered through rock-’n’the artistic community in Northeast Florida. roll. The result is a vibe that’s part poetry and A graduate of The Juilliard School and part performative, “JaMario thought it’d be cool Douglas Anderson School of the Arts, Stills to have a musician/mistral dropping in and out returned to Duval in 2014 to make a tangible of the scenes,” said Driscoll. contribution to the well-being of the city he Driscoll said that in talking to the director, calls home, after years spent professionally it became clear that what would work best acting and directing around the world, “That would be a kind of Leonard Cohenesque/ [experience] allowed me to figure out what Seu Jorge-ish presentation that one person my contribution could be when I came (Armado/Driscoll) could sustain with home.” Now—in addition to his Phase Eight technical ability, and responsibilities—he’s narrative cohesion. a drama instructor for LOVE’S LABOUR’S LOST “It works, because it Jacksonville University’s 8 p.m. Dec. 14, 15 & 16, and 2 p.m. Dec. 16, doesn’t make it too theater department. WJCT Studios, Northbank, $15, 904tix.com. modern,” said Stills, Though Love’s with a laugh. “And plus, Labour’s Lost is regarded it was such a beautiful era.” by some critics as a lesser piece in Shakespeare’s When asked how he cast the play, Stills oeuvre, Stills strongly disagrees, saying, “This replied, “I’m always looking for good people— play is an opportunity for me to empower and also people who are exceptionally skilled women.” He explained that the people who and have a great deal of potential.” He noted have always surrounded, loved, supported and that he regularly attends performances nurtured him have been women—and it might across the region and remembers notable also be because in this play, physical prowess is performances; he’ll then approach a certain subservient to mental prowess as exemplified actor when he thinks he has a suitable role. by the female characters—so he felt compelled It’s all in service to his goal of creating a to mount this work. sustainable regional theater company. Stills said he believes this to be one of the That phrase, a regional theater company, is Bard’s most successful plays, because of its transmission of various perspectives as well important. “Regional theater is a professional as its comedic flair and the use of language. acting opportunity. So when we say regional “It’s not overly textual,” he said, meaning theater, we’re talking about an organization that the language doesn’t create a barrier to that is recognized by the League of Resident understanding—in fact, its usage has been Theaters as an organization that is allowed cited by 20th-century scholars as a way to to pay actors, performers, writers, designers, challenge gender norms and skewer class creators and still do a season of work. It’s a issues. “If we talk about being an organization professional theater infrastructure and the that speaks on behalf of all voices, I beautiful thing about a regional theater is that think Shakespeare really did a wonderful it allows the national stage/songbook to vouch job of depicting and communicating on ideas and issues that are specific to that beautifully about women; and the text has a theater. “This is about a social impact through producing new [NEFL-based] plays and get contemporaneous scope to it.” them produced on a national level.” Love’s Labour’s Lost is one of the earliest Collaboration and the expansion of the of Shakespeare’s comedies (1598); it follows point of view of NEFL makers/producers is a Ferdinand, King of Navarre and three of his key tenant of Phase Eight, and Driscoll said, courtiers (Longaville, Dumain and Biron) with a hint of a laugh, that it’s what made after they make a pact to eschew worldly working on this production very cool—and delights in the name of education and at times—very frustrating. “Shakespeare has learning. Specifically, those delights in the been a literary form of communication for a form of yielding female flesh. “The mind shall long time, but he didn’t write [his plays] to be banquet, though the body pine,” courtier something you sit and read, he wrote [them] to Longaville sighs while making his oath. be an active piece of theater,” said Stills. Of course their noble quest to make Navarre Madeleine Peck Wagner the “wonder of the world […] a little Academe” madeleine@folioweekly.com fails to consider guests. Following the arrival of 30 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | DECEMBER 13-19, 2017
ARTS + EVENTS artist members Jan. 22; works judged and notifications made Jan. 23. 50 Executive Way, 280-0614, ccpvb.org. SANTA FE COLLEGE The college seeks artists for its annual springtime arts celebration; $25 to apply, Dec. 31 deadline; raul.villarreal@sfcollege.edu, zapplication.org. JACKSONVILLE MINI-MAKER FAIRE Groups or individuals may present projects, hobbies, experiments for the MOSH-sponsored event. Deadline Feb. 28, jacksonvillemakerfaire.com.
ART WALKS + MARKETS
NORTH BEACHES TOWN CENTER ART WALK More than 20 locations in Atlantic and Neptune beaches are open 5-9 p.m. Dec. 21 around Atlantic Boulevard and First Street, and Ocean Boulevard and Seventh Street. Artists display their works, there’s live music. Photographer Jack Zievis exhibits his Engaging Images. A reception is 5-8 p.m. Dec. 21 at Adele Grage, 716 Ocean Blvd., Atlantic Beach, 247-5828, free. 753-9594, nbaw.org. RIVERSIDE ARTS MARKET Themed “Merry Make + Take,” with local and regional art, music by Crucial Eddy Cotton, Nikki Talley, Yuleslide, plus food artists and a farmers’ row, 10 a.m.-4 p.m. Dec. 16 under the Fuller Warren Bridge, 715 Riverside Ave., free admission, 389-2449, riversideartsmarket.com ST. AUGUSTINE AMPHITHEATRE FARMERS MARKET Veggies, flowers, baked goods, handmade arts & crafts, a community booth, live music by the Free Rangers and more, 8:30 a.m.12:30 p.m. every Sat. at 1340C A1A S., staugamphitheatre. com. Admission, parking free. FERNANDINA BEACH FARMERS MARKET Every Sat., 9 a.m.1 p.m., year round, rain or shine. North Seventh Street, Fernandina, fernandinamarketplace.com.
MUSEUMS
CUMMER MUSEUM OF ART & GARDENS 29 Riverside Ave., 356-6857, cummermuseum.org. A Collector’s Eye: Celebrating Joseph Jeffers Dodge, and Mediterranea: American Art from the Graham D. Williford Collection, through Feb. 4. Bijoux Parisiens: French Jewelry from the Petit Palais, through Jan. 7. KARPELES MANUSCRIPT LIBRARY MUSEUM 101 W. First St., Springfield. Drew Edward Hunter presents Drewlusions through December.
MORE THE MERRIER
THE TEN TENORS perform holiday favorites, 8 p.m. Dec. 20 at The Florida Theatre, Downtown, $35-$65, 355-2787, floridatheatre.com.
MUSEUM OF CONTEMPORARY ART JACKSONVILLE 333 N. Laura St., 366-6911, mocajacksonville.unf.edu. Nicola Lopez’s A Gentle Defiance of Gravity & Form is the atrium project. Margaret Ross Tolbert: Lost Springs exhibits through December. Call & Response, through April 1. MANDARIN MUSEUM & HISTORICAL SOCIETY 11964 Mandarin Rd., mandarinmuseum.net. Civil War era artifacts recovered from the Union steamship Maple Leaf, items related to Harriet Beecher Stowe, a World War I exhibit, and displays related to the only remaining one-room schoolhouse in Duval County. MUSEUM OF SCIENCE & HISTORY 1025 Museum Cir., Southbank, 396-MOSH, themosh.org. Ancient Rome: Epic Innovators & Engineers! through December. African Americans in WWII through December. THE RITZ THEATRE & MUSEUM 829 N. Davis St., Downtown, 807-2010. Making Do: The African & Gullah GeeChee Connection, exhibits through Jan. 12.
GALLERIES
ADELE GRAGE CULTURAL CENTER 716 Ocean Blvd., Atlantic Beach. The Art of Investing Part Trois-Blanton Twins Art Show is on display through December. BREW 5 POINTS 1024 Park St., Riverside, chipsouthworth. com. Hack in the USA- R new work by Chip Southworth, runs through Jan. 1. THE CATHEDRAL ARTS PROJECT 207 N. Laura St., Ste. 300, Downtown, madeleinewagner.com. The Labor of Learning, by artist (and FW A&E editor) Madeleine Peck Wagner, exhibits through Dec. 14. THE CULTURAL CENTER AT PONTE VEDRA BEACH 50 Executive Way, Ponte Vedra Beach, 280-0614, ccpvb.org. Memories in the Making, featuring works by artists with dementia, is on display through July 17. HASKELL GALLEY Jacksonville International Airport. Cafcules, Middleton & Walburn shows through January. MONYA ROWE GALLERY 4 Rohde Ave., St. Augustine, 217-0637, monyarowegallery.com. Mount of Venus, by Elise Ferguson & Caris Reid, through Dec. 22. RAIN DOGS 1045 Park St., Riverside. Funny, It’s Not Funny, new works by Tony Rodrigues, is up through January. ST. AUGUSTINE ART ASSOCIATION 22 Marine St., 824-2310, staaa.org. Fantastic Florida, Selections from the STAAA Permanent Collection and Emmett Fritz: A Centennial Collection, are on display through December. SOUTHLIGHT GALLERY New location! 1 Independent Dr., Wells Fargo Building. December’s guest artist is Stephanie Cafcules. SPACE 42 2670 Phyllis St., Riverside, 888-421-9222, spacefortytwo.com. The fundraiser A Merry & Bright Affair, hosted by Babes Who Hustle, with live music by Stacey Bennett and Troi Aragon Buchanan, light bites, raffles, prizes and cash bar, is 8 p.m. Dec. 16; cocktail attire. Advance tickets $20; at door $25. Proceeds benefit The Women’s Center of Jacksonville. bwhmerryandbright.eventbrite.com. Dream/Sueño/Rêve, installation by John Carr and Estée Ochoa, through January. THE VAULT at 1904 1930 San Marco Ave., 398-2890, thevaultat1930.com. Art from Around the World, new works by Susan Astleford, is on display. WOLF & CUB 205 N. Laura St., Downtown, wolfandcubjax. com. For the Love of Munny, an exhibit of vinyl toys named “Munny,” is on display. Each collectable toy is designed, painted, destructed and created by Jax-based artists.
OVERFLOW
EVENTS
CHRISTMAS ART WALK AVONDALE Each year, the Shoppes of Avondale and 904 Happy Hour shut down St. Johns Avenue and transform the area into a magical holiday experience, with more than 100 artists and makers, live music, games, face-painting, crafts, letters to Santa Claus; free, family-friendly, pet-friendly, 5 p.m.-9 p.m. Dec. 14, avondaleartwalk.com. RUTHIE SHELTON BOOK SIGNING Shelton reads from and signs copies of her new book, Reality or Dream World, 1-4 p.m. Dec. 15 at The Book Loft, 214 Centre St., Fernandina, 261-8991, thebookloft.com. KEN KNIGHT DRIVE TOY DRIVE The residents of Ken Knight Drive North were affected by Hurricane Irma; they came together to provide relief. Drop off new toy donations any time, then celebrate the season (and raise funds) 8 p.m. Dec. 13 at Mary’s Pub House, 901 King St., Riverside. LUMINARIA 2017 Candles, chili, carols and cookies are featured for Riverside United Church Of Christ’s annual luminaria, 5:30 p.m. Dec. 17 at the church, 2858 Post St., 710-4994. AUTHOR BOOK SIGNING Michael Wiley’s Florida noir mystery, Monument Road, set in Jacksonville, first in a series featuring Franky Dast, is featured 6:30 p.m. Dec. 14 at San Marco Books & More, 1971 San Marco Blvd., 396-7597, michaelwileyonline.com. NANCY DAY BOOK SIGNING Day reads from and signs copies of her new book, Way Down Deep, 1-4 p.m. Dec. 17 at The Book Loft, 214 Centre St., Fernandina, 261-8991, thebookloft.com. LUMINARIA 2017 The annual lighting of the lanterns starts at sundown Dec. 17 in historic district of Riverside Avondale. Luminaria kits are available at RAM. Proceeds benefit Riverside Avondale Preservation’s programs. 389-2449, riversideavondale.org. NIGHTS OF LIGHTS Millions of twinkling lights cover St. Augustine nightly through January. See Old Town by trolley, on foot or in a horse and carriage. floridahistoriccoast.com. OPEN HOURS Exchange ideas of profundity and absurd grace, 11 a.m. Dec. 14 & 21, 10 a.m. Dec. 16, Yellow House, 577 King St., Riverside, culturalcouncil.org. _________________________________________ To list an event, send time, date, location (street address, city), admission price, contact number to print to Madeleine Peck Wagner; email madeleine@folioweekly. com or mail 45 W. Bay St., Ste. 103, Jacksonville FL 32202. Items run as space is available. Deadline noon Wed. for next Wed. printing.
FOLIO A+E : FILM Multitasker James Franco’s TRAGICOMIC TRUE STORY works
NO ‘ROOM’ FOR
IMPROVEMENT I
odd man and the cult status of The Room, t’s fascinating, and deliciously ironic, in much the same way Wiseau and Sestero that a terrific movie such as The Disaster do today. Yes, we laugh at Wiseau’s lack of Artist has as its subject one of the worst sense at times, but it doesn’t feel unkind. movies ever made, The Room. (No, not the Franco’s performance is essential for this, Brie Larson Oscar-winner; that was just as he embodies Tommy’s poor diction and Room.) With the deft touch of James Franco mannerisms with an earnest, good-natured as actor and director, and a brilliant script likeability. “It’s Los Angeles, everybody want by Scott Neustadter and Michael H. Weber, to be star,” Tommy says early on, and you see The Disaster Artist is a perfect confluence of his childlike innocence that suggests he doesn’t humor and ineptitude that’s unexpectedly and know any better. So we like him even though surprisingly magnificent. we’re constantly shaking our head at him, and In July 1998, aspiring actors Tommy because we like him, the entire movie works. Wiseau (Franco) and Greg Sestero (Dave To be sure, The Room is terrible. It’s one Franco, James’ bro) meet at a San Francisco of the few films I haven’t been acting class. Greg is drawn to able to finish, and I sat through Tommy’s lack of inhibition; THE DISASTER ARTIST all five Twilight movies. But Tommy sees an opportunity **** because of Wiseau and Sestero’s for a friend. They bond. Turns Rated R compliance (both have cameos!), out Tommy has money, so The Disaster Artist is able to be they move to Tommy’s place a guilt-free, off-the-wall riot. in L.A. to break into showbiz. It’s probably an Oscar-contender, so see it and When that doesn’t happen, they decide to then, if you’re feeling frisky, try to sit through make their own movie. That movie, in all its The Room, too. incompetent grandeur, is The Room (2003), Dan Hudak now considered “the greatest bad movie ever mail@folioweekly.com made” due to its DVD popularity and cult following. The Disaster Artist is about the making of The Room, based on a book of the same name by Sestero and Tom Bissell, and it pulls no punches. WASTED! THE STORY OF FOOD WASTE SJC Green Hands screens There’s a moment when Tommy is asked Anthony Bourdain’s film about the criminality of food waste, 6 p.m. Dec. 15 at St. Augustine Amphitheatre’s Front Porch, 1340 A1A S., if he plans to shoot in 35mm or HD. “Both,” 209-0367, free, staugustineamphitheatre.com, wastedfilm.com. he says; impractically, as there’s no reason SEE SANTA, WATCH ELF, FEED JACKSONVILLE! Will Ferrell, good deeds and fun start 2 p.m. Dec. 16 at The Florida Theatre, 128 E. to record in two different formats. Later, as Forsyth St., Downtown, admission is free with a donation of canned lead actor, he reacts with laughter after Greg’s or nonperishable food. Doors open 12:30 p.m. for Santa photo ops, character discusses an abused woman. “It’s hot chocolate, ornament-making. 562-5980, floridatheatre.com. SUN-RAY CINEMA Three Billboards Outside Ebbing, Minnesota human behavior,” he insists, and no one can and The Disaster Artist screen. Gremlins runs 7 p.m. Dec. 13. talk him out of it, especially since he’s paying Star Wars: The Last Jedi starts Dec. 14. Christmas Vacation runs Dec. 20. 1028 Park St., 359-0049, sunraycinema.com. the bills. From the start it’s clear Tommy CORAZON CINEMA & CAFÉ Only the Brave and The Florida Project thinks he’s well-versed in human nature, what screen. Throwback Thursday runs Miracle on 34th Street, noon people want to see and filmmaking, but he Dec. 14. Joseph, the Husband of Mary runs 7 p.m. Dec. 14. The Nutcracker Ballet, 7:30 p.m. Dec. 15. Unrest, 6 p.m. Dec. 16. The really has no idea how woefully ignorant he is Comedy Festival runs noon-9:30 p.m. Dec. 17; $5 students/military; in all regards. $10 general admission. More than 28 comics, film, improv, more. 36 Granada St., St. Augustine, 697-5736, corazoncinemaandcafe.com. It’s important, though, to see The Disaster IMAX THEATER The Polar Express, Amazing Mighty Micro Monsters, Artist is not mean-spirited. Rather than Amazon Adventure and Justice League screen. Star Wars: The Last mocking Wiseau, it seems to embrace the Jedi opens Dec. 14. St. Augustine, 940-4133, worldgolfimax.com.
NOW SHOWING
DECEMBER 13-19, 2017 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | 31
FOLIO A+E : MUSIC
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eave it to an artist like Jim Heath, who’s been obsessed with the rowdy, rollicking side of Americana for 30 years, to turn Christmas into a hellraising, downhome party of guitar-slinging, face-blasting proportions. Heath, longtime frontman of psychobilly godfathers Reverend Horton Heat, started the Horton’s Holiday Hayride specialty show a few years back, but its roots lie much deeper—in the Rev’s 2005 album We Three Kings: Christmas Favorites, which Heath says is still the band’s strongest seller. The Holiday Hayride has flourished thanks to another quirk of Reverend Horton Heat’s prolific career: Their focus the last 10 years has been in multi-night residencies, which have increased the opportunity to form longstanding relationships with guest headliners and keep Reverend Horton Heat ticking into its fourth decade of hardrocking, fun-loving success.
Folio Weekly: What’s different about Horton’s Holiday Hayride this year? Jim Heath: This one’s going to focus on quite a few more Christmas songs than the shows we’ve done in the past. Also, we’re going to have Big Sandy, The Blasters, and Junior Brown as our guests; we’ve been doing a lot of guest spots like that the last decade, where we have people come and join us onstage in the middle of our set. Big Sandy will most likely want to do a Christmas song or three, and Junior Brown, man, he’s a monster musician. Incredibly, over-thetop talented—one of the most dynamite guitar players ever. Why Christmas music, especially for a band like Reverend Horton Heat, which has described itself as “Stewed, Screwed and Tattooed” in the past? The Christmas album we did in 2005 is one of our most
STICKIN’ IT TO CHRISTMAS Rockabilly legends Reverend Horton Heat give Christmas A GOOD GOING OVER with Horton’s Holiday Hayride ns H olidaay H
consistent sellers! A lot of people like it, not least because it was more of a straight-up, G-rated Christmas album— on purpose, too. There are no “Who Put the Dick on Snowman?” kinds of songs; they’re all straight-up “Frosty,” “Rudolph” and “Silver Bells” style. It really transcends all age groups, from grandparents all the way to kids. And that’s a big thing for us, since none of our other albums are G-rated. [Laughs.] You mentioned the guest spots—how challenging is it when you play, say, six nights in one city with different backing bands each night? It’s real fun, even though we really don’t get to rehearse. Me and Jimbo [Wallace, Reverend Horton Heat’s longtime standup bass player] have to be ready to play the songs note for note, right off the bat. But one thing that’s nice is getting to connect with each city a little bit. Normally, we pull into town in the afternoon and leave in the middle of night, so we can’t do much besides play the gig. We’ve been doing tours like that for so long—six nights on, one night off—and
HORTON’S HOLIDAY HAYRIDE: REVEREND HORTON HEAT, JUNIOR BROWN, THE BLASTERS, BIG SANDY
5:30 p.m. Dec. 19, Ponte Vedra Concert Hall, 1050 A1A N., $35, 209-0399, pvconcerthall.com
32 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | DECEMBER 13-19, 2017
we’re used to it, but it doesn’t make it any easier. That determination and work ethic might be two of Reverend Horton Heat’s most important calling cards, though. Absolutely. It seems like an old cliché, but in reality, the stickto-it thing is what people don’t want to do. They want it handed to ’em. That’s one problem with our world. With young bands, I try to impart this wisdom: Get a really good-running van, and then spend a lot of money making sure that van is going to run well and get you to all the gigs. Put good tires on it. Sometimes they’re disappointed, because they wanted me to say, “If you play this kind of music that way, you’ll get a record deal.” Success has nothing to do with any of that. It has to do with taking your music out to the people. And that requires a van. It also requires a desire to play what you love and stick with it, something Reverend Horton Heat has done since the ’80s. You have to be willing to pursue your passion. Which is crazy, because I came to
that realization by hanging around the art world. I worked and lived at an art gallery in Dallas for a while, and I saw that having your own style was super-important. I never met a painter who would do one abstract painting, then a portrait, then another that was realism or impressionism. They would find their own voice and stick to it. That’s what art is. To me, that was clear as day: “I’m gonna stick to this rockabilly thing.” If you stick to your style, everything ends up coming out sounding like you, even if it’s the furthest thing from rockabilly. Your last album, Rev, captured that sound in a minimal, raw, self-recorded and self-produced way that many critics considered your best ever. I’ve got my own little studio with a bunch of gear, so recording became cool and fun again. I can mix to tape, add piano, all that cool, gooey stuff. I can go down there and start noodling around until I think I’ve got something cool, then refine it as much as I want. It’s a lot of work, and it’s always scary. Whenever it’s time to start a new album, I think, “Oh, God, I don’t know if I can do this again!” That’s one side of my brain; the other side is telling me, “That’s the way you’ve always felt. You can do it!” So I dive in and keep banging around until all of a sudden I’ve got these songs. What’s the saying? Ten percent inspiration and 90 percent perspiration? It’s a lot of work, but that’s all we do. Might as well work on something as fun as writing songs. Nick McGregor mail@folioweekly.com
FOLIO A+E : ARTS
FROM MANY,
ONE Interactive holiday light installation shows the STRENGTH AND BEAUTY of community collaboration
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city’s cultural capital depends on the quantity and quality of its creative class. For two-and-a-half centuries, this country’s greatest gift to the world has been attracting immigrants who add their own perspective to the cultural fabric, whose diverse aesthetics and approaches influence a mesh of ideas that accelerates our collective growth. Jacksonville has its fair share of cultural creatives; one of note is Kedgar Volta. Since arriving in Jacksonville, Volta—a native of Cuba—has consistently pushed innovation further and further. In 2014, he produced “Me Embellished,” which stopped thousands in their tracks during Downtown’s ArtWalk to gaze at more than 300 portraits hung on a building at the corner of Laura and Monroe. Each subject willingly abandoning their usual appearance in favor of emphasizing the strange and uncomfortable—contrary to how we typically project ourselves in the public arena. Volta’s work as an artist runs parallel to his work as a graphic designer. For eight years, he was one of the powerhouse creatives at Brunet-García, a local advertising agency whose work reaches millions through an extensive list of contracts with government agencies. While at Brunet-García, Volta befriended Joash Brunet. The two eventually stepped out on their own to seek the nexus among art, advertising and technology, launching the interactive experiential agency Castaño Group, which endeavors to bring brands and audiences together in creative ways. One of their first projects disrupted the way nonprofits communicate with donors. Audiences of the “See the Girl” project digitally wiped away a black screen to reveal smiling faces of girls, empowering and encouraging the viewer to do things within their power to connect and support the mission of the Delores Barr Weaver Policy Center. Their second major installation was in partnership with Brunet-García; a holiday promotion for Feeding Northeast Florida called “100 Plates.” Still being recognized
nationally in the advertising world, the project allowed users to interact with a fictional food-insecure child living in a food desert in North Jacksonville. An interactive wooden board projected animation and told the story of his daily existence, taking users through an interactive experience that helped them understand food insecurity in the area. At the end, a kiosk asked for the community’s support. The project raised a significant sum for Feeding Northeast Florida. Over the past year, the agency has grown; its client list now includes national entities, including a children’s museum in Baltimore, for which they are creating an interactive exhibition. “People want to have a meaningful experience, whether they’re in a museum, at a concert, or even interacting with a piece of advertising,” says Volta. “Our work attempts to blur the lines between art and advertising, using technological means to do so. I imagine Castaño Group as the intersection between those boundaries, bringing audiences together that never imagined themselves crossing barriers to connect.” This weekend, Castaño Group continues pursuing its mission of bringing communities together with the #Brighter2gether project; a 10-story interactive digital projection in the heart of 5 Points. They are asking for public participation; participants, working in pairs, will use interactive technology to create massive light projections on the façade of the Riverside Presbyterian Apartments building, creating a holiday-themed light show that will make a dynamic visual impact on the cityscape over the course of the weekend. At a time when politics, race and religion continue to divide, #Brighter2gether aims to show that we’re stronger and more creative at tackling big problems when we work together. Keith Marks mail@folioweekly.com _____________________________________ To participate in #Brighter2gether, come to the parking lot of The Bread & Board, 1030 Oak St., Riverside, anytime from 6-10 p.m. Fri., Sat. & Sun., Dec. 15, 16 & 17.
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Blues guitar wizard CHRIS DUARTE rocks the house at Mojo Kitchen in Jax Beach Thursday, Dec. 14.
LIVE + LOCAL MUSIC CONCERTS THIS WEEK
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OF MONTREAL, CHRISTINA SCHNEIDER’S GENIUS GRANT 8 p.m. Dec. 13, Mavericks Live, Jax Landing, 356-1110, $20. RITTZ, SAM LACHOW, DENVER HALL, CHAISE DREAMS 7 p.m. Dec. 13, Jack Rabbits, 1528 Hendricks Ave., San Marco, 398-7496, $20; Meet & greet $75. JOHN PRINE, AMANDA SHIRES 8 p.m. Dec. 13, The Florida Theatre, 128 E. Forsyth St., Downtown, 355-2787, $63-$103. SOUTH of SAVANNAH 8 p.m. Dec. 13, Whiskey Jax, 950 Marsh Landing Pkwy., Jax Beach, 853-5973. LEELYNN OSBORNE, COOKIN’ in DA KITCHEN 6 p.m. Dec. 14, Prohibition Kitchen, 119 St. George St., St. Augustine, 209-5704. GEORGIO THE DOVE VALENTINO, THE SWORDS OF FATIMA 8 p.m. Dec. 14, Nighthawks, 2952 Roosevelt Blvd. BEN HAGGARD 8 p.m. Dec. 13, PVC Hall, 1050 A1A N., 209-0399, $29.50-$39.50. The Ghosts of Christmas Eve: TRANS-SIBERIAN ORCHESTRA 7:30 p.m. Dec. 14, Veterans Memorial Arena, 300 A. Philip Randolph Blvd., Downtown, 630-3900, $28.75-$62.75, ticketmaster.com. CHEW, The BLIND SPOTS 9 p.m. Dec. 14, Rain Dogs, 1045 Park St., Riverside, 379-4969. CHRIS DUARTE 9:30 p.m. Dec. 14, Mojo Kitchen, 1500 Beach Blvd., Jax Beach, 247-6636, $12. CHRIS THOMAS BAND 8 p.m. Dec. 14, Whiskey Jax, Jax Beach. LONELY HIGHWAY 9:30 p.m. Dec. 14, Cheers Park Avenue, 1138 Park Ave., Orange Park, 269-4855. DANIELLE EVA JAZZ DUO, BE EASY 6 p.m. Dec. 14, Prohibition Kitchen. DR. NEU & BLUJAFUNK, DR. LONGINEU PARSONS & LP III 8 p.m. Dec. 14, Mudville Music Room, 3105 Beach Blvd., St. Nicholas, 352-7008, $10. PERPETUAL GROOVE 8 p.m. Dec. 14, 1904 Music Hall, 19 Ocean St., Downtown, $10. MELISSA SMITH OPEN MIC 8 p.m. Dec. 14, Whiskey Jax, 10915 Baymeadows Rd., Ste. 135, Southside, 634-7208. DAVID RAMIREZ, MOLLY PARDEN 7:30 p.m. Dec. 14, Jack Rabbits, $20. PURITY RING, SOUND of CERES 7 p.m. Dec. 14, PVC Hall, $30-$35. The FRITZ Natural Mind Album Release Show: GROOVE ORIENT, The BLEU CATS 8 p.m. Dec. 15, 1904 Music Hall, $12-$15. CHUCK NASH BAND 10 p.m. Dec. 15 & 16, Flying Iguana Taqueria & Tequila Bar, 207 Atlantic Blvd., Atlantic Beach, 853-5680. JOHN AUSTILL 5 p.m. Dec. 15, Cheers Park Avenue. OTHER BODY & LA-A 8 p.m. Dec. 15, Rain Dogs, 1045 Park St., Riverside, 379-4969, $8. MARE WAKEFIELD, NOMAD, TOM & NATALIE 7:30 p.m. Dec. 15, Mudville Music Room. DIDGES CHRIST SUPERDRUM, The CHROME FANGS, FLEIXFENIX, ARMAGEDDON 3 8 p.m. Dec. 15, Jack Rabbits, $7 over 21; $10 under 21. LUKE COMBS, JOSH PHILLIPS, FAREN RACHELS 8 p.m. Dec. 15, The Florida Theatre, $15-$25. GO GET GONE 9 p.m. Dec. 15, Whiskey Jax Southside. PARKER URBAN BAND 10 p.m. Dec. 15, Mojo Kitchen, $10. AL MANISCOTO QUARTET, RADIO LOVE 6 p.m. Dec. 15, Prohibition Kitchen. GIDEON, WAGE WAR, OCEANS ATE ALASKA, VARIALS, LOATHE 8 p.m. Dec. 16, 1904 Music Hall, $10.
HERE COMES THE HERO, JENNI REID, DANCING WITH GHOSTS 7 p.m. Dec. 16, Jack Rabbits. SUNJAMMER BAND 8:30 p.m. Dec. 16, Whiskey Jax, Jax Beach. CRUCIAL EDDY COTTON, NIKKI TALLEY, YULESLIDE 10 a.m. Dec. 16, Riverside Arts Market, 715 Riverside Ave., 389-2449. A Not So Silent Night ’17: ALLELE, BLEEDING IN STEREO, SOULSWITCH, SUNSHINE & BULLETS, GOLD, FRANKINCENSE & MYRRH, AUDITORY ARMY 1ST 7 p.m. Dec. 16, Mavericks Live, $10. NORTH of 40 9 p.m. Dec. 16, Whiskey Jax Southside. RAISIN CAKE ORCHESTRA, FUNK BUTTER 6 p.m. Dec. 16, Prohibition Kitchen. HARLEY FLANAGAN (Cro-Mags) 8 p.m. Dec. 17, Nighthawks, $15-$18. AFTON SHOWCASE 6 p.m. Dec. 17, 1904 Music Hall, $10. SAMUEL SANDERS 8:30 p.m. Dec. 17, Flying Iguana. The SUPERVILLIANS 7 p.m. Dec. 18, Jack Rabbits, $12. TBA BIG BAND 7 p.m. Dec. 18, Mudville. CHELSEA SADDLER 6 p.m. Dec. 18, Prohibition Kitchen. Horton’s Holiday Hayride: REV. HORTON HEAT, JUNIOR BROWN, The BLASTERS, BIG SANDY 6:30 p.m. Dec. 19, PVC Hall, $35. BULLMOOSE 8 p.m. Dec. 19, Rain Dogs. SAM PACETTI, THE WILLOWWACKS 6 p.m. Dec. 19, Prohibition Kitchen. The GRAHAMS, STATE 28, ZEB PADGETT 7 p.m. Dec. 19, Jack Rabbits, $8. SEARCHING SERENITY, CANDOR, MADHAUS, DROWN 7 p.m. Dec. 19, 1904 Music Hall, $8.
UPCOMING CONCERTS
DJ CAPONE Dec. 20, Cheers Park Avenue ROSEDALE, PARKRIDGE, BRICKS GRENADE, CITY IN THE CLOUDS Dec. 20, Jack Rabbits TRADED YOUTH, RIP JUNIOR, DISCORDANT GENERATION, BLURG, COSMIC HIGHWAY Dec. 20, 1904 Music hall Christmas Show: CAROL BRISTOW-ZUR Dec. 20, Whiskey Jax Southside. SOUTH of SAVANNAH Dec. 21, Cheers Park Avenue LUKE PEACOCK, OTHER PEOPLE’S SONGS Dec. 21, Mudville Music Room BILLY BUCHANAN Dec. 21, Whiskey Jax, Jax Beach The LITTLE BOOKS, MERCY MERCY Dec. 21, Jack Rabbits IVAN PULLEY, BUDDY CRUMP Dec. 22, Cheers Park Avenue Larry’s B Day: THE PARTY CARTEL Dec. 22, Whiskey Jax Southside. Ugly Christmas Sweater Party: UNIVERSAL GREEN, TOP SHELF PEOPLE Dec. 22, 1904 Music Hall LET’S RIDE JAZZ Dec. 22, Prohibition Kitchen MEDAL MILITIA, YEAR ZERO, ELITE Dec. 22, Jack Rabbits YOWSAH Dec. 22, Whiskey Jax, Jax Beach SOULSHINE & the SWAT TEAM Dec. 22 & 23, Flying Iguana RIP JUNIOR, PUBLIC Dec. 23, Jack Rabbits CATCH THE GROOVE Dec. 23, Whiskey Jax, Jax Beach Professor Whiskey Productions: TITS, TASSELS & TENSIL Dec. 23, 1904 Music Hall SWING THEORY Dec. 23, Prohibition Kitchen GEORGE ASPINALL BAND Dec. 23, Whiskey Jax Southside. 10th Annual JAXMAS: RICKOLUS, DJ CHRIS G. Dec. 25, Jack Rabbits A1NUSIC904 Dec. 26, Jack Rabbits
JULIA GULIA Dec. 27, Cheers Park Avenue KICKING NAMES BAND Dec. 27, Whiskey Jax, Jax Beach THE FIREWATER TENT REVIVAL Dec. 28, Cheers Park Avenue PVRK Dec. 28, 1904 Music Hall JERROD ALLEN, HERE COMES the HERO, KELLY WHITE Dec. 29, Jack Rabbits BRYAN HAYES Dec. 29, Breezy Jazz Club DONNA the BUFFALO Dec. 29, PVC Hall MIKE SHACKELFORD BAND Dec. 29, Mudville Music Room AERIAL TRIBE REUNION Dec. 29, Surfer the Bar COLTON McKENNA Dec. 29, Prohibition Kitchen HARD 2 HANDLE Dec. 29, Whiskey Jax Southside CASSIDY LEE Dec. 29, Cheers Park Avenue CALL ME BRONCO, MUDTOWN, BLURG Dec. 29, Rain Dogs HEATHER GILLIS Dec. 29, Mojo Kitchen THE SPILL CANVAS Dec. 29, 1904 Music Hall FLAGSHIP ROMANCE, EX-HUSBAND Dec. 30, Jack Rabbits GANG of SIX Dec. 30, Mudville J CREW BAND Dec. 30 & 31, Flying Iguana PROBABLE CAUSE Dec. 30, Whiskey Jax Southside THE NTH POWER, NYE LOVE TRAIN, SNARKY PUPPY, TREY ANASTASIO BAND HORNS, PARKER URBAN, BEDSIDE, RECESS, VLAD the INHALER, BOOTY BOO, BIG BUCK$ CREW Dec. 31, 1904 Music Hall New Year’s Eve Bash: LOVE MONKEY Dec. 31, Cheers Park Avenue NYE with NORTH of 40 Dec. 31, Whiskey Jax Southside SOUTHERN RUCKUS Dec. 31, Boondocks Grill & Bar HENRY ROLLINS Jan. 1, PVC Hall ILL-ESHA Jan. 1, 1904 Music hall HELLZAPOPPIN CIRCUS SIDESHOW Jan. 2, 1904 Music Hall BETTYE LaVETTE Jan. 4, PVC Hall SOME KIND of NIGHTMARE Jan. 4, ShantyTown Pub AFTERFUNK, NIG LOGIC & the Truth Serum, THE PINE BOX SWELLERS Jan. 5, 1904 Music Hall PETER BRADLEY ADAMS Jan. 5, Café Eleven WILD PONIES Jan. 6, Jack Rabbits LARRY MANGUM Jan. 6, Mudville Music Room New Years Throwdown: EVERGREEN TERRACE, BOYS NO GOOD, JUST LIKE GENTLEMEN, CLOUD 9 VIBES, MIZZY RAW, PERSONALITIES, YOUNG GHOSTS, HUNGOVER, INTERVENTION, PHANTOMS, PUZZLES TO PIECES, SUCK BRICK KID, BOYSIN, THATGUYTRESHUN, SPEECH PATTERNS, FAIR FIGHT, DROWNING ABOVE WATER, HIPPY BLAINE, SHE BLEEDS MERLOT, METAMAN Jan. 6, Mavericks Live BOCCHERINI, PUCCINI, NINO ROTA, WOLF Jan. 7, PVC Hall RIP JUNIOR, CUTTING TEETH, PSYCHO HILL, ADULT LIFE, R-DENT Jan. 7, 1904 Music Hall JACKSON BROWNE, GREG LEISZ Jan. 7, Florida Theatre BAD IDOLS, SIN Jan. 9, Nighthawks STEVE POLTZ Jan. 10, Café Eleven JACK WILLIAMS Jan. 11, Mudville Music Room The ZOMBIES: Odessey and Oracle 50th Anniversary Jan. 12, PVC Hall THE ORCHESTRA (ex-ELO members), JACKSONVILLE SYMPHONY ROCK ORCHESTRA Jan. 12, The Florida Theatre ZACH DEPUTY, COME BACK ALICE Jan. 12, 1904 Music Hall SOCIAL REPOSE, SEPTEMBER MOURNING, NIGHT ARGENT Jan. 12, Jack Rabbits FRED EAGLESMITH Jan. 12, Café Eleven A TEMPTATIONS REVUE, BO HENDERSON Jan. 13, Ritz Theatre
LIVE + LOCAL MUSIC FLAW Jan. 13, 1904 Music Hall ANDY FRESCO & THE U.N. Jan. 14, 1904 Music Hall IAN FITZGERALD Jan. 15, Jack Rabbits JONNY LANG Jan. 16, Florida Theatre LEE SCRATCH PERRY Jan. 17, Jack Rabbits FINN MAGILL, ALAN MURRAY, OLD DAWGS NEW TRIXX Jan. 17, Mudville Music Room LARRY MANGUM, DAVID MALLETT Jan. 18, Mudville Music Room DECADES REWIND Jan. 18, Thrasher-Horne Center DEAHPHISH ORCHESTRA Jan. 18, 1904 Music Hall MARY BRAGG Jan. 19, Mudville Music Room JASON FARNAM Jan. 19, Thrasher-Horne Center JAKE OWEN Jan. 19, The Florida Theatre FADE TO BLACK Metallica Tribute Jan. 19, 1904 Music Hall THE TRAVELIN’ McCOURYS Jan. 20, PVC Hall IN THIS MOMENT, P.O.D., DED Jan. 20, Florida Theatre STEWART TUSSING BAND Jan. 20, Mudville Music Room BIG SOMETHING, BOBBY LEE RODGERS Jan. 20, Jack Rabbits THEY MIGHT BE GIANTS Jan. 24, PVC Hall JACOB JOHNSON Jan. 25, Mudville MARTY STUART & his FABULOUS SUPERLATIVES Jan. 25, PVC Hall DOROTHY Jan. 25, Jack Rabbits FELLY Jan. 25, 1904 Music Hall MASON JENNINGS Jan. 26, PVC Hall The STOMPDOWN Jan. 27, Florida Theatre BLACK VIOLIN Jan. 27, PVC Hall CES CRU, The PALMER SQUARE, GPO Jan. 27, Jack Rabbits YONDER MOUNTAIN STRING BAND Jan. 28, PVC Hall WORLD INFERNO FRIENDSHIP SOCIETY, COMMUNITY CENTER, TAIL LIGHT REBELLION, MUDTOWN Jan. 28, Nighthawks ROTTEN MANGOS, FERNWAY, BILLY & BELLA Jan. 28, 1904 Music Hall Take Me to the River: WILLIAM BELL, BOBBY RUSH, DON BRYANT Jan. 30, Florida Theatre GAELIC STORM Jan. 30, PVC Hall VELON THOMPSON Jan. 30, Mudville Music Room HAUNTED SUMMER Jan. 30, Jack Rabbits G3 2018: JOE SATRIANI, PHIL COLLEN, JOHN PETRUCCI Jan. 31, Florida Theatre ZOLOPHT Jan. 31, Jack Rabbits TANYA TUCKER Feb. 1, Florida Theatre HARRIS BROTHERS Feb. 1, Mudville JOHN 5 & the CREATURES, JACKIE STRANGER Feb. 2, 1904 Music Hall Anthems Tour: ADAM ANT Feb. 2, Florida Theatre MARY WILSON (The Supremes) Feb. 3, Ritz Theatre SPAFFORD Feb. 3, Jack Rabbits JOE MULLINS & the RADIO RAMBLERS Feb. 3, Mudville Music Room The VERVE PIPE Feb. 4, Café Eleven FEEDING FINGERS Feb. 4, Nighthawks JAKE SHIMABUKURO Feb. 6, PVC Hall DIANA KRALL Feb. 7, Florida Theatre TESSA VIOLET, SECRET MIDNIGHT PRESS, GIVE ME MOTION Feb. 7, Jack Rabbits Front Porch Series: JOHN McCUTCHEON, GRANT PEEPLES Feb. 8, PVC Hall CODY JINKS, WARD DAVIS, SUNNY SWEENEY Feb. 8, Florida Theatre L.A. GUNS, BUDDERSIDE Feb. 8, Jack Rabbits THE KENNEDYS Feb. 8, Mudville Music Room TESLA Feb. 9, Florida Theatre JOHN MORELAND Feb. 9, St. Augustine Amphitheatre DECLAN McKENNA Feb. 9, 1904 Music Hall ELLAMENO BEAT, OF GOOD NATURE Feb. 9, Jack Rabbits G LOVE & SPECIAL SAUCE Feb. 10, PVC Hall LITTLE RIVER BAND, PABLO CRUISE Feb. 10, Florida Theatre The LANGSTON HUGHES PROJECT Feb. 10, Ritz Theatre UNDER THE STREETLAMP Feb. 11, PVC Hall SETH GLIER Feb. 11, Cafe Eleven BLUES TRAVELER Feb. 11, Florida Theatre LESS THAN JAKE, FOUR YEAR STRONG, DIRECT HIT, BEARINGS Feb. 12, Mavericks Live The HOT SARDINES Feb. 13, Florida Theatre QUEENS of the NIGHT Feb. 14, Nighthawks PUDDLES PITY PARTY Feb. 15, PVC Hall BOTTLE ROCKETS, CHUCK PROPHET & the MISSION EXPRESS Feb. 16, PVC Hall CHRIS YOUNG Feb. 16, St. Augustine Amphitheatre SIERRA HULL Feb. 17, PVC Hall DANIEL O’DONNELL Feb. 17, Florida Theatre WILLIE NELSON & FAMILY, LOS LONELY BOYS Feb. 18, St. Augustine Amphitheatre COLIN QUINN Feb. 18, PVC Hall GEORGE BENSON Feb. 19, Thrasher Horne Center ERIC JOHNSON, TOMMY TAYLOR, LYLE BROCK, ARIELLE Feb. 20, PVC Hall ROBERT CRAY & HIS BAND Feb. 21, PVC Hall SOUTHERN CULTURE ON THE SKIDS Feb. 22, St. Augustine Amphitheatre’s Front Porch DOYLE BRAMHALL II Feb. 22, PVC Hall MINDI ABAIR & the BONESHAKERS, AIR SUPPLY Feb. 23, Florida Theatre JAMIE DeFRATES, MIKE SHACKELFORD, LARRY MANGUM Feb. 23, Mudville Music Room GEORGE WINSTON Feb. 23, PVC Hall The Blackwater Sol Revue: JJ GREY & MOFRO, LOS LOBOS, NORTH MISSISSIPPI ALLSTARS, MARCUS KING BAND, more Feb. 24, St. Augustine Amphitheatre The EXPENDABLES, THROUGH the ROOTS, PACIFIC DUB Feb. 24, St. Augustine Amphitheatre’s Backyard Stage
THE WEEPIES Feb. 24, PVC Hall UNKNOWN HINSON, JD WILKES Feb. 24, Jack Rabbits An Evening with MAVIS STAPLES Feb. 25, PVC Hall MICHAEL McDONALD Feb. 27, Florida Theatre An Evening with JORMA KAUKONEN Feb. 27, PVC Hall BLACKBERRY SMOKE March 1, Florida Theatre CAIN’T NEVER COULD, LARA HOPE & the ARKTONES March 1, Nighthawks NIGHT OF BEE GEES March 1, Thrasher-Horne Center RAGLAND March 1, Jack Rabbits DIXIE DREGS March 1, PVC Hall PHILLIP PHILLIPS March 2, Florida Theatre FLEET FOXES March 2, St. Augustine Amphitheatre 50th Anniversary: TOWER OF POWER March 2, PVC Hall JOHN HAMMOND March 3, PVC Hall JUSTIN MOORE, DYLAN SCOTT March 3, St. Augustine Amphitheatre TIERNEY SUTTON BAND March 4, Ritz Theatre KNOCKED LOOSE, TERROR, JESUS PIECE, STONE March 4, 1904 Music Hall ANA POPOVIC March 7, PVC Hall 25th Annual Guitar Gathering: THE LOS ANGELES GUITAR QUARTET March 8, Florida Theatre; DASotA benefit Celtic Music & Heritage Festival: EMMET CAHILL, DUBLIN CITY RAMBLERS, SEVEN NATIONS, RATHKELTAIR, EMISH, ALBANNACH, ENTER the HAGGIS, STEEL CITY ROVERS, HOUSE of HAMILL March 9-11, Francis Field, St. Augustine COAST MODERN March 9, Jack Rabbits Southern Uprising Tour: TRAVIS TRITT, THE CHARLIE DANIELS BAND, THE MARSHALL TUCKER BAND, THE OUTLAWS March 9, St. Augustine Amphitheatre An Evening You’ll Forget for the Rest of Your Life: STEVE MARTIN, MARTIN SHORT, THE STEEP CANYON RANGERS, JEFF BABKO March 9, Times-Union Center. BIANCA DEL RIO March 10, PVC Hall SIDELINE March 10, Mudville Music Room BRAD PAISLEY, CHASE BRYANT March 10, St. Augustine Amphitheatre ROBIN TROWER March 10, Mudville The TENDERLOINS March 11, St. Augustine Amphitheatre THE IRISH ROVERS March 11, Florida Theatre The MARVIN GAYE EXPERIENCE March 11, ThrasherHorne Center ROBIN TROWER March 13, PVC Hall DAVE EGGER ORCHESTRA March 16, St. Augustine Amphitheatre STEVE HOFSTETTER March 16, Jack Rabbits NAHKO “MY NAME IS BEAR TOUR”: The LATE ONES, XIUHTEZCATL March 16, PVC Hall GET the LED OUT March 16, Florida Theatre JOE JENKS March 16, Mudville Music Room FOREIGNER March 16, St. Augustine Amphitheatre 1964 The TRIBUTE: The Best Beatles Band on Earth March 17, St. Augustine Amphitheatre ALICE COOPER March 18, Florida Theater A DAY TO REMEMBER, PAPA ROACH, FALLING IN REVERSE, THE DEVIL WEARS PRADA March 20, St. Augustine Amphitheatre MIKE & the MECHANICS March 21, PVC Hall STEEP CANYON RANGERS March 22, Florida Theatre RODNEY CARRINGTON March 23, Florida Theatre MIKE SHACKELFORD March 23, Mudville Music Room THREE DOG NIGHT, The LORDS of 52nd STREET March 25, Florida Theatre LOUDON WAINWRIGHT III, LUCY WAINWRIGHT ROCHE March 30, PVC Hall UDO DIRKSCHNEIDER March 30, Jack Rabbits Death of a King: TAVIS SMILEY, MARCUS ROBERTS March 30, T-U Center MAKS & VAL March 31, Florida Theatre BUDDY GUY, JIMMIE VAUGHAN, QUINN SULLIVAN April 5, Florida Theatre TOMMY EMMANUEL, ANTHONY SNAPE April 6 & 7, PVC Hall CH BOTTI Apr Aprilil 13 13, FFlorida lorida Theatre CHRIS
ABBA the CONCERT April 17, Florida Theatre BRIAN CULBERTSON April 18, Florida Theatre BRUCE COCKBURN April 19, PVC Hall Wanee 2018: WIDESPREAD PANIC, PHIL LESH & the TERRAPIN FAMILY BAND, As The CROW FLIES, DARK STAR ORCHESTRA, ST. PAUL & the BROKEN BONES, JAIMOE’S JASSZ BAND, The CHRIS ROBINSON BROTHERHOOD, NORTH MISSISSIPPI ALLSTARS, KARL DENSON’S TINY UNIVERSE, EAT a BUNCH of PEACHES, PIGEONS PLAYING PING PONG, WALTER TROUT, SONNY LANDRETH, The MARCUS KING BAND, GEORGE PORTER JR. & the RUNNING PARDNERS, SOUL REBELS, LES BROS, PINK TALKING FISH, BOBBY LEE ROGERS TRIO, BIG SOMETHING, NEW ORLEANS SUSPECTS, BERRY OAKLEY’S INDIGENOUS SUSPECTS, MIDNIGHT NORTH, The YETI TRIO, CRAZY FINGERS April 19, 29 & 21, Suwannee Music Park, Live Oak THOMAS RHETT, BRETT YOUNG, CARLY PEARCE April 20, Daily’s Place DAVID FOSTER April 24, Florida Theatre 10,000 MANIACS April 25, PVC Hall The Voice of Romance Tour: JOHNNY MATHIS April 26, Florida Theatre Welcome to Rockville: OZZY OSBOURNE, FOO FIGHTERS, AVENGED SEVENFOLD, QUEENS of the STONE AGE, BILLY IDOL, FIVE FINGER DEATH PUNCH, GODSMACK, STONE SOUR, BLACK VEIL BRIDES, AVATAR, MORE April 27, 28 & 29, Metro Park BLACK JACKET SYMPHONY, JACKSONVILLE ROCK SYMPHONY ORCHESTRA: Sgt. Pepper’s 50th Anniversary Tour April 27, Florida Theatre 25th Anniversary Live at the Acropolis: YANNI April 27, St. Augustine Amphitheatre ALLEN PARSONS PROJECT, CARL PALMER April 28, Florida Theatre LITTLE BIG TOWN, KACEY MUSGRAVES, MIDLAND May 4, St. Augustine Amphitheatre DOUGLAS ANDERSON GUITAR STUDENT BENEFIT May 5, Mudville Music Room JOE BONAMASSA May 10, St. Augustine Amphitheatre STEVE FORBERT May 12, Mudville Music Room MARC COHN & HIS TRIO May 13, PVC Hall ODESZA May 16, Daily’s Place ROD MacDONALD June 15, Mudville Music Room Last Summer on Earth 2018 Tour: BARENAKED LADIES, BETTER THAN EZRA, KT TUNSTALL July 6, St. Augustine Amphitheatre DON McLEAN July 27, PVC Hall
LIVE MUSIC CLUBS
AMELIA ISLAND + FERNANDINA
LA MANCHA, 2709 Sadler Rd., 261-4646 Miguel Paley 5:30-9 p.m. every Fri.-Sun. Javier Parez every Sun. THE SALTY PELICAN, 12 N. Front St., 277-3811 Dan Voll & Michelle 4:30 p.m. Dec. 17 SLIDERS SEASIDE GRILL, 1998 S. Fletcher Ave., 277-6652 Pili Pili Dec. 13. Tad Jennings Dec. 14. Dan Voll, Hupp & the Honeybadgers Dec. 15. Chase Foraker 2 p.m., JC & Mike 6 p.m. Dec. 17. Cassidy Lee Dec. 18. Mark O’Quinn 6 p.m. Dec. 19 SURF RESTAURANT, 3199 S. Fletcher Ave., 261-5711 Katfish Lee 1 p.m. Dec. 13, 14 & 19
AVONDALE + ORTEGA
CASBAH CAFÉ, 3628 St. Johns Ave., 981-9966 Goliath Flores every Wed. Jazz every Sun. Live music every Mon. ECLIPSE, 4219 St. Johns Ave. KJ Free 9 p.m. Tue. & Thur. Indie dance 9 p.m. Wed. ’80s & ’90s dance Fri.
THE BEACHES
(All venues in Jax Beach unless otherwise noted) 1st STREET LOFT, 502 N. First St., 241-7848 Open mic 7 p.m. every Thur. ATLANTIC BEACH BREWING CO., 725 Atlantic Blvd., Ste. 3 & 15, Atlantic Beach, 372-4116 Sam Sanders 8 p.m. Dec. 16
Grab a brew and check out local singer/songwriter BILLY BOWERS Wednesday, Dec. 13 at Ragtime in Atlantic Beach.
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36 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | DECEMBER 13-19, 2017
LIVE + LOCAL MUSIC BLUE WATER DAIQUIRI & OYSTER BAR, 205 N. First St., 249-0083 Live music most weekends BRASS ANCHOR PUB, 2292 Mayport Rd., Atlantic Beach, 249-0301 Open mic night 8 p.m. every Wed. CULHANE’S IRISH PUB, 967 Atlantic Blvd., AB, 249-9595 Michael Funge 6:30 p.m. every Sun. FLYING IGUANA TAQUERIA & TEQUILA BAR, 207 Atlantic Blvd., NB, 853-5680 Chuck Nash Band 10 p.m. Dec. 15 & 16. Samuel Sanders Dec. 17 FLY’S TIE IRISH PUB, 177 Sailfish Dr., AB, 246-4293 Live music on weekends GREEN ROOM BREWING, 228 Third St. N., 201-9283 Mark O’Quinn Dec. 15. Cody Johnson Dec. 16 GUSTO, 1266 Beach Blvd., 372-9925 Groov 7:30 p.m. every Wed. Michael Smith every Thur. Milton Clapp every Fri. Under the Bus every Sat. Robert Eccles 6 p.m. every Sun. LYNCH’S IRISH PUB, 514 First St. N., 249-5181 Briteside 10 p.m. Dec. 15. Evan Michael & the Well Wishers 10 p.m. Dec. 16. Split Tone every Thur. Chillula every Sun. Kristen Campbell every Mon. MELLOW MUSHROOM, 1018 Third St. N., 241-5600 Side Hustle 9:30 p.m. Dec. 14. Live music most weekends MEZZA Restaurant & Bar, 110 First St., NB, 249-5573 Gypsies Ginger every Wed. Mike Shackelford, Steve Shanholtzer every Thur. Mezza Shuffle every Mon. Trevor Tanner every Tue. MOJO KITCHEN, 1500 Beach Blvd., 247-6636 Chris Duarte 9:30 p.m. Dec. 14. Parker Urban Band 10 p.m. Dec. 15 OCEAN 60, 60 Ocean Blvd., AB, 247-0060 Taylor Roberts 7 p.m. Dec. 13 RAGTIME TAVERN, 207 Atlantic Blvd., AB, 241-7877 Billy Bowers 7 p.m. Dec. 13. Jetty Cats Dec. 14. Bay Street Dec. 15 & 16. Cody Johnson Dec. 20 SOUTHERN GROUNDS & CO., 200 First St., NB, 249-2922 Jimmi Mitchell Dec. 16. Jazz Corner 6 p.m. every Tue. SURFER THE BAR, 200 First St. N., 372-9756 Soulo Lyon Dec. 13. Who Rescued Who Dec. 15. Ellameno Beat Dec. 16. Rachael Warfield Dec. 19. Aaron Thomas Dec. 20 WHISKEY JAX, 950 Marsh Landing Pkwy., 853-5973 South of Savannah 8 p.m. Dec. 13. Chris Thomas Band 8 p.m. Dec. 14. Sunjammer Band 8:30 p.m. Dec. 16. North of 40 9 p.m. Dec. 16
CAMDEN COUNTY, GA.
CAPTAIN STAN’S Smokehouse, 700 Bedell Dr., Woodbine, 912-729-9552 Flood Brothers Dec. 15. Bluff 5 Dec. 16. Touch of Grey 6:30 p.m. Dec. 22 JJ’S TAVERN, 711 Osborne St., St. Marys, 912-882-5280 Live music most weekends
DOWNTOWN
1904 MUSIC HALL, 19 Ocean St. N., 345-5760 Perpetual Groove 8 p.m. Dec. 14. The Fritz Natural Mind Album Release Show: Groove Orient, The Bleu Cats 8 p.m. Dec. 15. Gideon, Wage War, Oceans Ate Alaska, Varials, Loathe 8 p.m. Dec. 16. Afton Showcase 6 p.m. Dec. 17. Searching Serenity, Candor, Madhaus, Drown 7 p.m. Dec. 19 BREEZY JAZZ CLUB, 119 W. Adams St., 666-7562 Eric Moore Dec. 13. Kia Nicole Dec. 14. Joe Watts Dec. 15. Lisa Kelly, Scott Giddens, Mike Perez, Jeremy Smith Dec. 16 DOS GATOS, 123 E. Forsyth St., 354-0666 DJ Brandon Thur. DJ NickFresh Sat. DJ Randall Mon. DJ Hollywood Tue. FIONN MacCOOL’S, Jacksonville Landing, 374-1247 Spade McQuade 6 p.m. Dec. 13. Ryan Crary 8 p.m. Dec. 15. Jimmy Solari 8 p.m. Dec. 16. Spade McQuade 6-9 p.m. Dec. 20 HOURGLASS PUB, 345 E. Bay St., 469-1719 Singersongwriter open mic 9 p.m. Thur. Live music 9:30 p.m. Fri. INTUITION ALE WORKS, 929 E. Bay St., 683-7720 Live music most weekends JACKSONVILLE LANDING, 2 Independent Dr., 353-1188 Spanky the Band 6 p.m. Dec. 14. Jason Evans Band 9 p.m. Dec. 15. The Party Cartel 9 p.m. Dec. 16. Smooth McFlea 9 p.m. Dec. 22 MAVERICKS LIVE, Jax Landing, 356-1110 Of Montreal, Christina Schneider’s Genius Grant 8 p.m. Dec. 13. A Not So Silent Night ’17: Allele, Bleeding in Stereo, Soulswitch, Sunshine & Bullets, Gold, Frankincense & Myrrh, Auditory Army 1st 7 p.m. Dec. 16. Joe Buck, DJ Justin every Thur.-Sat. MYTH NIGHTCLUB, 333 E. Bay St., 707-0474 SkyHye, Golden Child, Xander, Eric Rush, Jay Pizzle, Dyvision Dec. 15. Sharam Dec. 16. Dirty Third Dec. 17
FLEMING ISLAND
BOONDOCKS GRILL & BAR, 2808 Henley Rd., Green Cove, 406-9497 South Paw, Mark Johns Dec. 14. Matt Knowles, Blackwater Grease Dec. 15. Scott McGinley, South Paw Dec. 16. Marty Farmer Dec. 17 MELLOW MUSHROOM, 1800 Town Ctr. Blvd., 541-1999 Kurt Lanham 8:30 p.m. Dec. 14 WHITEY’S FISH CAMP, 2032 C.R. 220, 269-4198 Area 51 Band 9 p.m. Dec. 15
INTRACOASTAL
CLIFF’S Bar & Grill, 3033 Monument Rd., Ste. 2, 645-5162 Falling Forward Dec. 13. Ivy League 10 p.m. Dec. 15 & 16. Open mic every Tue. JERRY’S Sports Bar & Grille, 13170 Atlantic Blvd., 220-6766 Boogie Freaks 8:30 p.m. Dec. 15. Live music every Fri.
MANDARIN
ENZA’S, 10601 San Jose Blvd., Ste. 109, 268-4458 Brian Iannucci Dec. 13 & Dec. 17 IGGY’S GRILL & BAR, 104 Bartram Oaks Walk, Ste. 101, 209-5209 DJ Greg 7 p.m. every Wed. TAPS BAR & GRILL, 2220 C.R. 210, St. Johns, 819-1554 Dennis Miller 8 p.m. Dec. 13. 5 O’clock Shadow 9:30 p.m. Dec. 15
ORANGE PARK + MIDDLEBURG
CHEERS PARK AVENUE, 1138 Park Ave., 269-4855 DJ Capone 9:30 p.m. Dec. 13. Lonely Highway 9:30 p.m. Dec. 14. John Austill 5 p.m. Dec. 15 DALTON’S SPORTS GRILL, 2620 Blanding Blvd., Ste. 17, 282-1564 Craig Hand 8 p.m. Dec. 16. Shayne Rammler Dec. 19 DEE’S MUSIC BAR, 2141 Loch Rane Blvd., Ste. 140, 375-2240 DJ Troy every Wed. The HILLTOP, 2030 Wells Rd., 272-5959 John Michael on the piano every Tue.-Sat. The ROADHOUSE, 231 Blanding Blvd., 264-0611 Live music every Fri. & Sat. SHARK CLUB, 714 Park Ave., 215-1557 Digital Skyline 9 p.m. Dec. 15. Live music most weekends
OVERSET
PONTE VEDRA
PUSSER’S GRILLE, 816 A1A, 280-7766 Savanna Leigh Bassett 6 p.m. Dec. 13. Live music every Wed.-Sat. TABLE 1, 330 A1A N., 280-5515 Live music every Wed., Thur. & Sat.
RIVERSIDE + WESTSIDE
ACROSS the STREET, 948 Edgewood Ave. S., 683-4182 Bill Ricci Dec. 14. Live music most weekends HOBNOB, 220 Riverside Ave., Ste. 10, 513-4272 Live music every Fri. NIGHTHAWKS, 2952 Roosevelt Blvd. Georgio The Dove Valentino, The Swords of Fatima 8 p.m. Dec. 14. Other Body & LA-A 8 p.m. Dec. 15. Harley Flanagan (Cro-Mags) 8 p.m. Dec. 17 RAIN DOGS, 1045 Park St., 379-4969 Chew, The Blind Spots 9 p.m. Dec. 14. The Young Step Dec. 16. Bullmoose 8 p.m. Dec. 19 RIVERSIDE ARTS MARKET, 715 Riverside Ave., 389-2449 Crucial Eddy Cotton, Nikki Talley, Yuleslide 10 a.m. Dec. 16 SOUTH KITCHEN & SPIRITS, 3638 Park St., 475-2362 Live music most weekends
ST. AUGUSTINE
ARNOLD’S LOUNGE, 3912 N. Ponce de Leon Blvd., 824-8738 Lisa’s Madhatters 9 p.m. Dec. 16. Mr. Natural every Thur. CELLAR UPSTAIRS, 157 King St., 826-1594 Vinny Jacobs 2 p.m. Dec. 17 DOS COFFEE & WINE, 300 San Marco Ave., 342-2421 Live music every weekend MARDI GRAS, 123 San Marco Ave., 823-8806 Southern Burn Dec. 15. Ron Norris Dec. 16. Fre Gordon acoustic open mic 7 p.m. every Sun. Justin Gurnsey open jam 8 p.m. every Mon. MELLOW MUSHROOM, 410 Anastasia Blvd., 826-4040 Eddie Pickett 6 p.m. Dec. 15, 22 & 29 PLANET SARBEZ, 115 Anastasia Blvd., 342-0632 Alex Parama, Moonlight Drive-in, The Blind Spots Dec. 15 PROHIBITION KITCHEN, 119 St. George St., 209-5704 Leelyn Osborn, Cookin In Da Kitchen 6 p.m. Dec. 13. Danielle Eva Jazz Duo, Be Easy 6 p.m. Dec. 14. Al Maniscoto Quartet, Radio Love 6 p.m. Dec. 15. Raisin Cake Orchestra, Funk Butter 6 p.m. Dec. 16. Chelsea Saddler 6 p.m. Dec. 18. Sam Pacetti, The Willowwacks 6 p.m. Dec. 19 TEMPO, 16 Cathedral Pl., 342-0286 Open mic night 7:30 p.m. Dec. 13. Jay Bird 7 p.m. Dec. 14. Jax English Salsa Band 6 p.m. Dec. 15 & 17. Alex Richman Dec. 16. Bluez Dudez, Solou 7:30 p.m. Dec. 19 TRADEWINDS LOUNGE, 124 Charlotte St., 829-9336 Spanky Dec. 15 & 16
SAN MARCO
DOUBLETREE, 1201 Riverplace Blvd., 398-8800 Live music 4:30 p.m. every Thur. JACK RABBITS, 1528 Hendricks Ave., 398-7496 Rittz, Sam Lachow, Denver Hall, Chaise Dreams 7 p.m. Dec. 13. David Ramirez, Molly Parden 7:30 p.m. Dec. 14. Didges Christ Superdrum, The Chrome Fangs, Fleixfenix, Armageddon 3 8 p.m. Dec. 15. Here Comes The Hero, Jenni Reid, Dancing With Ghosts 7 p.m. Dec. 16. The Supervillians 7 p.m. Dec. 18. The Grahams, State 28, Zeb Padgett 7 p.m. Dec. 19 MUDVILLE MUSIC ROOM, 3104 Atlantic Blvd., 352-7008 Dr. Neu & Blujafunk, Dr. Longineu Parsons & LP III 8 p.m. Dec. 14. Mare Wakefield, Nomad, Tom & Natalie 7:30 p.m. Dec. 15. TBD Big Band Dec. 18. Other People’s Songs, Luke Peacock 7 p.m. Dec. 21
SOUTHSIDE, ARLINGTON & BAYMEADOWS
MELLOW MUSHROOM, 9734 Deer Lake Ct., 997-1955 Barrett Jockers Dec. 14. Courtnie Frasier Dec. 15 WHISKEY JAX, 10915 Baymeadows Rd., 634-7208 Melissa Smith 8 p.m. Dec. 14. Go Get Gone 9 p.m. Dec. 15. Live music most weekends
SPRINGFIELD + NORTHSIDE
CROOKED ROOSTER BREWERY, 1478 S. Sixth St., Macclenny, 653-2337 Pet Yankees Dec. 16. Open mic 7 p.m. every Wed. KNUCKLEHEADS Bar, 850532 U.S. 17, 222-2380 Live music every weekend MELLOW MUSHROOM, 15170 Max Leggett Pkwy., 757-8843 Live music most every weekend OCEANWAY BAR, 12905 Main St. N., 647-9127 Live music most every weekend
_____________________________________
To list your band’s gig, please send time, date, location (street address, city), admission price, and a contact number to print to Madeleine Peck Wagner, email madeleine@folioweekly.com or by the U.S. Postal Service, 45 W. Bay St., Ste. 103, Jacksonville FL 32202. Events run on a space-available basis. Deadline is at noon every Wednesday for the next Wednesday’s publication.
DECEMBER 13-19, 2017 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | 37
FOLIO DINING
Downtown’s newest hot spot for fine dining and rooftop cocktails is COWFORD CHOPHOUSE. photo by Madison Gross
AMELIA ISLAND + FERNANDINA BEACH
BRETT’S WATERWAY CAFÉ, 1 S. Front St., 261-2660. F On the water at Centre Street’s end. Southern hospitality, upscale atmosphere; daily specials, fresh local seafood, aged beef. $$$ FB L D Daily CAFÉ KARIBO, 27 N. Third St., 277-5269, cafekaribo.com. F Family-owned café in historic building. Worldly fare, made-from-scratch dressings, sauces, desserts, sourcing fresh veggies, seafood. Dine in or al fresco under oakshaded patio. Microbrew Karibrew Pub brews beer onsite; imports. $$ FB K TO R, Su; L Daily, D Tu-Su in season THE CRAB TRAP, 31 N. Second St., 261-4749, ameliacrabtrap.com. F For nearly 40 years, family-ownedand-operated. Fresh local seafood, steaks, specials. HH. $$ FB L Sa-M; D Nightly JACK & DIANE’S, 708 Centre St., 321-1444, jackanddianescafe.com. F Renovated 1887 shotgun house. Faves: jambalaya, French toast, pancakes, mac & cheese, crêpes. Vegan items. Inside or porch overlooking historic area. $$ BW K TO B L D M, W, F, Sa; B L Su LA MANCHA, 2709 Sadler Rd., 261-4646, lamancharestaurante.com. Spanish, Portuguese fare, Brazilian flair. Tapas, seafood, steaks, sangria. Drink specials. AYCE paella Sun. $$$ FB K TO D Nightly LARRY’S GIANT SUBS, 474272 S.R. 200, 844-2225. F SEE ORANGE PARK. MOON RIVER PIZZA, 925 S. 14th St., 321-3400, moonriverpizza.net. F 2017 Best of Jax winner. Authentic Northern-style pizzas, 20-plus toppings, pie/slice. Calzones. $ BW TO L D M-Sa THE MUSTARD SEED CAFÉ, 833 Courson Rd., 277-3141, nassaushealthfoods.net. Casual organic eatery, juice bar, in Nassau Health Foods. All-natural organic items, smoothies, juices, herbal teas, coffees, daily specials. $$ K TO B L M-Sa THE PATIO PLACE, 416 Ash St., 410-3717, patioplacebistro. com. Bistro/wine bar/crêperie’s global menu uses crêpes: starters, entrées, shareables, desserts. $$ BW TO B L D Tu-Su
DINING DIRECTORY KEY AVERAGE ENTRÉE COST $ $$
$
< $10
$$$
10- $20
$$$$
$
20-$35 > $35
ABBREVIATIONS & SPECIAL NOTES BW = Beer/Wine
L = Lunch
FB = Full Bar
D = Dinner Bite Club = Hosted Free Folio Weekly Bite Club Event F = Folio Weekly Distribution Spot
K = Kids’ Menu TO = Take Out B = Breakfast R = Brunch
To list your restaurant, call your account manager or call or text SAM TAYLOR, Folio Weekly publisher, at 904-860-2465 (email: staylor@folioweekly.com). 38 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | DECEMBER 13-19, 2017
POINTE RESTAURANT, 98 S. Fletcher Ave., 277-4851, elizabethpointelodge.com. 2017 Best of Jax winner. In award-winning inn Elizabeth Pointe Lodge. Seaside dining; in or out. Hot buffet breakfast daily, full lunch menu. Homestyle soups, specialty sandwiches, desserts. $$$ BW K B L D Daily THE SALTY PELICAN BAR & GRILL, 12 N. Front St., 277-3811, thesaltypelicanamelia.com. F 2017 Best of Jax winner. 2nd-story outdoor bar. T.J. & Al offer local seafood, fish tacos, Mayport shrimp, po’boys, cheese oysters. $$ FB K L D Daily SLIDERS SEASIDE GRILL, 1998 S. Fletcher Ave., 277-6652, slidersseaside.com. F 2017 Best of Jax winner. Oceanfront. Award-winning handmade crabcakes, fried pickles, fresh seafood. Open-air 2nd floor balcony, playground. $$ FB K L D Daily THE SURF RESTAURANT & BAR, 3199 S. Fletcher Ave., 261-5711, thesurfonline.com. Oceanview dining since 1957, inside or on the deck. Steaks, seafood, burgers, daily food and drink specials; Wing It Wednesdays. $$ FB K TO L D Daily T-RAY’S BURGER STATION, 202 S. Eighth St., 261-6310, traysburgerstation.com. F 2017 Best of Jax winner. Family-owned-and-operated 18+ years. Blue plate specials, burgers, biscuits & gravy, shrimp. $ BW TO B L M-Sa
ARLINGTON + REGENCY
LARRY’S GIANT SUBS, 1301 Monument Rd., Ste. 5, 724-5802. F SEE ORANGE PARK.
AVONDALE + ORTEGA
FOOD ADDICTZ GRILL, 1044 Edgewood Ave. S., 240-1987. Family-and-veteran-owned place is all about home cooking. Customer faves: barbecued pulled pork, blackened chicken, Caesar wrap and Portobello mushroom burger. $ K TO B L D Tu-Su HARPOON LOUIE’S, 4070 Herschel St., Ste. 8, 389-5631, harpoonlouies.net. F Locally owned & operated 20+ years. American pub. 1/2-lb. burgers, fish sandwiches, pasta. Local beers, HH. $$ FB K TO L D Daily MOJO NO. 4 URBAN BBQ & WHISKEY BAR, 3572 St. Johns Ave., Ste. 1, 381-6670, mojobbq.com. 2017 Best of Jax winner. Pulled pork and Carolina-style barbecue. Delta fried catfish. Avondale’s Mojo has shrimp & grits, specialty cocktails. Local musicians on weekends. $$ FB K TO L D Daily PINEGROVE MARKET & DELI, 1511 PineGrove Ave., 389-8655, pinegrovemarket.com. F 2017 Best of Jax winner. 40+ years. Burgers, Cubans, subs, wraps. Onsite butcher, USDA choice prime aged beef. Craft beers. Fri. & Sat. fish fry. $ BW TO B L D M-Sa RESTAURANT ORSAY, 3630 Park St., 381-0909, restaurantorsay.com. 2017 Best of Jax winner. French/ Southern bistro; local organic ingredients. Steak frites, mussels, pork chops. $$$ FB R, Su; D Nightly SIMPLY SARA’S, 2902 Corinthian Ave., 387-1000, simplysaras.net. F Down-home fare from scratch: eggplant fries, pimento cheese, baked chicken, fruit cobblers, chicken & dumplings, desserts. BYOB. $$ K TO L D Tu-Sa, B Sa SOUTH KITCHEN & SPIRITS, 3638 Park St., 475-2362, south.kitchen. Southern classics: crispy catfish with smoked gouda grits, family-style fried chicken, burgers, vegetarian, vegan, gluten-free options. $$ FB K TO L D Daily
BAYMEADOWS
AL’S PIZZA, 8060 Philips Hwy., Ste. 105, 731-4300. F 2017 Best of Jax winner. SEE INTRACOASTAL. INDIA’S, 9802 Baymeadows Rd., Ste. 8, 620-0777, indiajaxcom. F Authentic cuisine, lunch buffet. Curries, vegetables, lamb, chicken, shrimp, fish tandoori. $$ BW L M-Sa; D Nightly LARRY’S GIANT SUBS, 8616 Baymeadows Rd., 739-2498. F SEE ORANGE PARK.
DINING DIRECTORY METRO DINER, 9802 Baymeadows Rd., 425-9142. F 2017 Best of Jax winner. SEE SAN MARCO. NATIVE SUN NATURAL FOODS MARKET & DELI, 11030 Baymeadows Rd., 260-2791. 2017 Best of Jax finalist. SEE MANDARIN. PATTAYA THAI GRILLE, 9551 Baymeadows Rd., Ste. 1, 646-9506, ptgrille.com. 2017 Best of Jax finalist. Since 1989, the family-owned place has offered an extensive menu of traditional Thai, vegetarian, new-Thai; curries, seafood, noodles, soups. Low-sodium & gluten-free. $$$ BW TO L D Tu-Sa THE WELL WATERING HOLE, 3928 Baymeadows Rd., Ste. 9, 737-7740, thewellwateringhole.com. Local craft beers, glass/bottle wines. Meatloaf sandwich, pulled Peruvian chicken, vegan black bean burgers. Gluten-free pizzas, desserts. HH specials. $$ BW K TO L M-F; D Tu-Sa WHISKEY JAX, 10915 Baymeadows Rd., Ste. 135, 634-7208, whiskeyjax.com. Popular gastropub has craft beers, gourmet burgers, handhelds, signature plates, tacos and–sure– whiskey. HH M-F. $$ FB B Sa & Su; L F; D Nightly
BEACHES
(Venues are in Jax Beach unless otherwise noted.)
1st STREET LOFT, 502 N. First St., 241-7848, 1ststreetloft.com. New beach spot serves breakfast and lunch all day. Local artists’ works are displayed. It’s a coffeehouse and live music venue, too. $ TO B L D W-Sa; B L Su & M ANGIE’S SUBS, 1436 Beach Blvd., 246-2519. ANGIE’S GROM SUBS, 204 Third Ave. S., 241-3663. F 2017 Best of Jax winner. Fresh ingredients, 25+ years. Huge salads, blue-ribbon iced tea. Grom has Sun. brunch, no alcohol. $ K BW TO L D Daily BOLD BEAN COFFEE ROASTERS, 2400 S. Third St., Ste. 201, 374-5735. 2017 Best of Jax winner. SEE RIVERSIDE. BREEZY COFFEE SHOP WINE BAR, 235 Eighth Ave. S., 241-2211, breezycoffeeshopcafe.com. Local beachy coffee & wine shop by day; wine bar by night. Fresh baked pastries, breakfast sandwiches all day. Grab-n-Go salads, cheeses, hummus. $ BW K TO B L D Daily The CRAFT PIZZA CO., 240 Third St. N., Neptune Beach, 853-6773, thecraftpizzaco.com. F Al Mansur’s new place has innovative pies made with locally sourced ingredients. Dine inside or out. $$ BW L D Daily CRUISERS GRILL, 319 23rd Ave. S., 270-0356, cruisersgrill. com. Locally owned & operated 20+ years. Half-pound burgers, fish sandwiches, big salads, award-winning cheddar fries, sangria. $ BW K TO L D Daily EUROPEAN STREET CAFÉ, 992 Beach Blvd., 249-3001, europeanstreet.com. F 2017 Best of Jax winner. SEE RIVERSIDE.
BIG SHOTS!
LARRY’S GIANT SUBS, 6586 GA. Hwy. 40 B6, St. Marys, 912-576-7006. F SEE ORANGE PARK. OUTERBANKS SPORTS BAR & GRILLE, 140 The Lakes Blvd., Ste. H, Kingsland, 912-729-5499. Fresh seafood, burgers, steaks, wings. $$ FB TO D Nightly SALT.PEPPER.THYME, 105 N. Lee St., Kingsland, 912-510-0444, saltpepperthyme.net. Varied American Southern fare in an elegant setting. Dine in or out. $$ BW K TO L W; L & D Th-Sa
FLEMING ISLAND
GRASSROOTS NATURAL MARKET, 1915 East-West Pkwy., 541-0009. F 2017 Best of Jax winner. SEE RIVERSIDE. MOJO SMOKEHOUSE, 1810 Town Center Blvd., Ste. 8, 264-0636. 2017 Best of Jax winner. SEE AVONDALE. WHITEY’S FISH CAMP, 2032 C.R. 220, 269-4198, whiteysfishcamp.com. F 2017 Best of Jax winner. Real fish camp. Gator tail, freshwater catfish, daily specials, on Swimming Pen Creek. Tiki bar. Come by boat, bike or car. $ FB K TO L Tu-Su; D Nightly
Rogue Bar
927 King St. • Riverside
Born in: Jacksonville Years in Biz: 15 Favorite Bar: Sidecar Favorite Cocktail Style: Straight up Go-To Ingredients: Whiskey Hangover Cure: Lots of water, B vitamins and an Emergen-C Will Not Cross My Lips: Montelobos Mezcal Insider’s Secret: Yelling at a bartender will never get a drink in your hand faster than nice, respectful customers. Celebrity Sighting At Your Bar: Tanya Borrero-Borelli When You Say "The Usual": Slow & Low whiskey neat
CAMDEN COUNTY, GEORGIA
CAPTAIN STAN’S SMOKEHOUSE, 700 Bedell Dr., Woodbine, 912-729-9552. Barbecue, sides, hot dogs, burgers, desserts. Dine in or out on picnic tables. $$ FB K TO L & D Tu-Sa
The most DELISH holiday gifts
DOWNTOWN
BELLWETHER, 100 N. Laura St., 802-7745, bellwetherjax.com. Elevated Southern classics in an understated setting, with chef/owner Jon Insetta’s focus on flavors, and chef Kerri Rogers’ culinary creativity. The Northeast Florida menu changes seasonally. Rotating local craft beers, regional spirits, cold brew coffee program. $$ FB TO L M-F CASA DORA, 108 E. Forsyth, 356-8282, casadoraitalian.com. F Serving Italian fare, 40+ years: veal, seafood, pizza. Homemade salad dressing. $ BW K L M-F; D M-Sa OLIO MARKET, 301 E. Bay St., 356-7100, oliomarket.com. F Scratch soups, sandwiches. Duck grilled cheese, seen on Best Sandwich in America. $$ BW TO B R L M-F; D F & Sa SPLIFF’S GASTROPUB, 15 N. Ocean St., 844-5000, spliffsgastropub.com. 2017 Best of Jax winner. Music venue has munchie apps, mac & cheese dishes, pockets, gourmet grilled cheese sandwiches. HH M-F. $ BW L D M-Sa URBAN GRIND COFFEE COMPANY, 45 W. Bay, Ste. 102, 516-7799, urbangrind.coffee. Locally roasted whole bean brewed coffees, espressos, pastries, smoothies, bagels. Chicken/tuna salad, sandwiches. WiFi. $ B L M-F URBAN GRIND EXPRESS, 50 W. Laura St., 516-7799. SEE ABOVE. ZODIAC BAR & GRILL, 120 W. Adams St., 354-8283, thezodiacbarandgrill.com. 16+ years. Mediterranean cuisine, American fare, paninis, vegetarian dishes. Lunch buffet. Espressos, hookahs. HH M-F. $ FB L M-F; D W-Sa
CINDY NEWMAN
FLYING IGUANA TAQUERIA & TEQUILA BAR, 207 Atlantic Blvd., NB, 853-5680, flyingiguana.com. F 2017 Best of Jax winner. Latin American: tacos, seafood, carnitas, Cubana fare. 100+ tequilas. $ FB TO L D Daily GUSTO, 1266 Beach Blvd., 372-9925, gustojax.com. Classic Old World Roman fare, big Italian menu: homestyle pasta, beef, chicken, fish delicacies; open pizza-tossing kitchen. Reservations encouraged. $$ FB TO L R D Tu-Su HAWKERS ASIAN STREET FARE, 241 Atlantic Blvd., NB, 425-1025. 2017 Best of Jax winner. SEE RIVERSIDE. LARRY’S GIANT SUBS, 657 Third St. N., 247-9620. F SEE ORANGE PARK. METRO DINER, 1534 3rd St. N., 853-6817. F 2017 Best of Jax winner. SEE SAN MARCO. MOJO KITCHEN BBQ PIT & BLUES BAR, 1500 Beach Blvd., 247-6636. 2017 Best of Jax winner. SEE AVONDALE. M SHACK, 299 Atlantic Blvd., AB, 241-2599, shackburgers.com. 2017 Best of Jax winner. Burgers, hot dogs, fries, shakes. Dine indoors or out. $$ BW L D Daily NATIVE SUN NATURAL FOODS MARKET & DELI, 1585 N. Third St., 458-1390. 2017 Best of Jax finalist. SEE MANDARIN. RAGTIME TAVERN SEAFOOD & GRILL, 207 Atlantic Blvd., AB, 241-7877, ragtimetavern.com. F 34 years and counting, the iconic seafood place serves blackened snapper, sesame tuna, Ragtime shrimp. Daily HH, brunch Sun. $$ FB L D Daily WHISKEY JAX, 950 Marsh Landing Pkwy., 853-5973. SEE BAYMEADOWS.
BITE-SIZED
INTRACOASTAL WEST
AL’S PIZZA, 14286 Beach Blvd., Ste. 31, 223-0991. F 2017 Best of Jax winner. 30 years of awesome gourmet pizza, baked dishes. All day HH M-Th. $ FB K TO L D Daily LARRY’S GIANT SUBS, 10750 Atlantic Blvd., Ste. 14, 642-6980. F SEE ORANGE PARK.
MANDARIN + NW ST. JOHNS
AL’S PIZZA, 11190 San Jose Blvd., 260-4115. F 2017 Best of Jax winner. SEE INTRACOASTAL. ATHENS CAFÉ, 6271 St. Augustine Rd., Ste. 7, 733-1199, athenscafejax.com. 2017 Best of Jax winner. 20+ years of Greek fare, serving dolmades (stuffed grape leaves), baby shoes (stuffed eggplant), Greek beers. Vegetarian-friendly. Full bar. Early bird menu Mon.-Fri. $$ FB L M-F; D M-Sa CRUISERS GRILL, 5613 San Jose Blvd., Ste. 1, 737-2874. SEE BEACHES. FIRST COAST DELI & GRILL, 6082 St. Augustine Rd., 733-7477. Pancakes, bacon, sandwiches, burgers, wings. $ K TO B L Daily JAX DINER, 5065 St. Augustine Rd., 739-7070, jaxdiner.com. Simple name, simple concept: Local. Chef Roderick “Pete” Smith, a local culinary expert with nearly 20 years under his apron, uses locally sourced ingredients from area farmers, vendors and the community for American and Southern dishes. Seasonal brunch. $ K TO B L M-F, D F METRO DINER, 12807 San Jose Blvd., 638-6185. F 2017 Best of Jax winner. Dinner nightly. SEE SAN MARCO. MOJO BAR-B-QUE, 1607 University Blvd. W., 732-7200, mojobbq.com. 2017 Best of Jax winner. SEE AVONDALE. NATIVE SUN NATURAL FOODS MARKET & DELI, 10000 San Jose Blvd., 260-6950, nativesunjax.com. F 2017 Best of Jax finalist. Organic soups, baked items, sandwiches,
GIFT
LIKE A LOCAL
FINDING THE PERFECT GIFT CAN BE CHALLENGING, but when it comes to universally beloved presents, food and drink are always a good way to go. Local food and drink are even better. Check out some of these locally sourced gift ideas for the holiday season. Warning: You may want to steal them for yourself! Find these deals online or in-store at area retailers.
FLOUR & FIG BAKEHOUSE
Support a dream and get something tasty. The restaurant and bakery about to open in Springfield offers community perks to those who support them before they open and they’ve got some pretty sweet deals for interesting gifting, like T-shirt swag ($25) and some cool packages. My top two? The Coffee Break Card ($50) and the Party in the House ($50) option. The Coffee Break Card keeps on giving; you get six drinks (choice of coffee, tea or kombucha) plus six items from the pastry case (choose a pie slice, handpie, cookie, bar or muffin) or The Party in the House, which gets your giftee an invitation to a pre-opening Flour & Fig party. No matter what you choose, the recipient will be sure to thank you! flourandfigbakehouse.com
CAMP COCKTAILS
These are perfect gifts for stuffing in carry-on bags or adding to your host/hostess gift stash. CAMP will make you sooo popular at holiday parties! The clear glass jar is filled with dehydrated citrus, herbs, spices or fruit to make some fantastic handcrafted cocktails right at home. Choose from flavors like the Aromatic Citrus, Hibiscus Ginger Lemon, Pineapple Jalapeno and more ($15 each). Here’s how it works: Just add 8 ounces of your favorite spirit to the jar and let steep for three days. Then, using the alcohol steeped in CAMP, add a mixer like pineapple juice, Lacroix, prosecco, club soda—whatever suits your tastes. You get to play mixologist and every drink can be different; each jar serves around eight. To ramp up the gift, add a mini-bottle of the recipient’s favorite spirit (more below). Oh, and you might want to have one ready just for you, for those family gatherings. campcraftcocktail.com
FRESHJAX HANDCRAFTED SPICE BLENDS
As the reigning spice king and queen of Jax, Fresh Jax makes gift-giving easy with sets of spices and flavors to intrigue all types of palates. From the adventurous Ghost Pepper Salt to the simple and tasty Rosemary Lemon, they’re ready to SPICE UP YOUR LIFE. They even have build-your-own spice packs and ready-made sample boxes like “All-star BBQ Essential Spice Set” and “Grilling Spices.” I can hear Dad’s appreciative “oohhs” and “ahhs” already. ($10 and up). freshjax.com
BOOZE LIKE A LOCAL
Get into the holiday spirit with the help of our many local distilleries. Pick up a bottle of Florida Double Cask Bourbon or some sugarcane Pot Distilled Rum from St. Augustine Distillery or stop at Jacksonville’s Carve Craft Vodka or Manifest Distilling for some fragrant gin—I’ll be damn jealous if you’re lucky enough to get a bottle of the barrel-aged gin. A little more low-key (in terms of ABV), Crowlers are all the rage. Can and growler unite in a perfect to-go vessel. That means you get fresh beers, ciders and meads that don’t require a full canning facility. Find these unicorns at Aardwolf Brewing Company and Wicked Barley Brewing Company. ($10-$50)
BEE FRIENDS FARM HONEY
If you want a gift that will be used every day and will last a long, long time (like millennia), give honey. (Full disclosure: I work there.) From regular varieties like orange blossom and Tupelo, to lesser-knowns like gallberry and black mangrove, Bee Friends Farm has what you crave. They also have a wide range of creamed honey, a rich, creamy honey that gets its thick consistency from a crystallization process so, in spite of what you might guess, there are no additives other than the flavors, like pure Ceylon Cinnamon or dark chocolate from Claude’s. My favorite? Mexican Vanilla Creamed Honey, which is perfect in and on everything, from coffee to tea to pancakes and oatmeal. ($10-$20). beefriendsfarm.com
LOCALLY ROASTED COFFEE
Vagabond or Bold Bean coffee is always a great gift; it’s a taste of home, no fancy latte-making skills required. The bags also make travelling with gifts clean and easy. As a bonus, you open a heavenly scented suitcase where you get where you’re going! ($10-$20). vagabondcoffee.com, boldbeancoffee.com
THE GIFT OF A GOOD TIME
Gift cards might seem like a cop-out, but they can be a night out for the lucky recipient at any number of our tastiest dining spots, and some local restaurants are upping the ante. Town Hall and Moxie are offering a great deal: When you buy a $100 gift card, you get a $40 bonus card. Candy Apple Café and Bread and Board are doing similar deals. Get ’em while they last! Oh, and if you’re not yet convinced that these venues make for a perfect evening out, check my reviews; I won’t steer you wrong. Brentley Stead biteclub@folioweekly.com DECEMBER 13-19, 2017 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | 39
DINING DIRECTORY PINT-SIZED
THE PERFECT
PARTY FAVOR
Locals know that both the food and the service at PIZZALLEY’S in St. Augustine are top notch. photo by Carl Miller
Be the BEST GUEST of all with a growler AS HOLIDAY PARTY SEASON HEATS UP, INVITEES ASK that age-old question: What host or hostess gift should I take? Happily, there’s an answer to please just about everyone: a growler filled with delicious, fresh craft beer. Less pretentious than wine, a good craft brew is a drink we can all get with. And if you follow the rules in last week’s column, everyone will love it. But what is a growler? As early as 10,000 B.C., man was putting quantities of beer in jugs, to save for later. Archeologists know this because jugs have been found and carbon-dated. As our ancestors’ beer-drinking tastes refined, they began to refine the jugs’ shapes as well. Egyptians put lids on jugs and even placed beer in tombs of departed royals to drink in the hereafter. Early Germanic peoples used hollowed-out animal horns and animal skins. Covered wooden buckets came into use, followed by metal buckets with lids. Later, elaborate beer steins emerged in Bavaria. It was those metal buckets that picked up the name “growler,” because of the curious noises they made being carried home from the tavern. The lids rattled a bit because, as the expectant imbiber walked, the beer agitated, releasing carbon dioxide. The unique noise was called the beer’s growl; thus, the containers were growlers. Growlers have been elevated since the days of growling buckets, but the name’s now slapped on most any vessel–other than a standard can or bottle–filled with fresh brew from a tap. In most states, it’s legal to fill quart, half-gallon and one-gallon brewery growlers for consumption off premises. Most breweries sell an empty growler for about $5. What’s poured into that empty flagon is what ups the cash outlay. Bigger beers cost more than pedestrian pale ale, obvee. Be ready for a shock if you order a gallon of the latest Russian Imperial project. If you already have a growler or two, remember these easy refill rules: • Insist the filler use a new cap every time. • When it’s full, go home and put your growler • in the fridge right away; better yet, keep an iced • cooler in the back seat (out of reach as you • drive, of course). • Once the growler’s opened, the beer quickly goes • flat, so finish it within two or three days—two • weeks at the max. • When it’s empty, immediately rinse well with hot • water, air dry. Don’t use a wire brush. • Never use soap in it or stick it in the dishwasher. • The next fill-up will taste like soap. I cannot stress the last rule enough. With beer, cleanliness is next to godliness. Taking a dirty growler to a fill station could result in an unclean (and probably infected) growler. This can only lead to trouble. The word “nasty” comes to mind. When deciding what to take to that ugly sweater party, swing by a local taproom and grab a growler or six of brew. It’ll show you put some thought into the gift, even if your sweater isn’t all that ugly. Marc Wisdom marc@folioweekly.com 40 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | DECEMBER 13-19, 2017
OVERSET
prepared foods. Juice, smoothie, coffee bar. All-natural beer/ wine. $ BW TO K B L D Daily
ORANGE PARK
THE HILLTOP, 2030 Wells Rd., 272-5959, hilltop-club.com. Southern fine dining. New Orleans shrimp, certified Black Angus prime rib, she-crab soup, desserts. Extensive bourbon selection. $$$ FB D Tu-Sa LARRY’S GIANT SUBS, 1330 Blanding Blvd., Ste. 165, 276-7370. 1545 C.R. 220, 278-2827. 700 Blanding Blvd., Ste. 15, 272-3553. 5733 Roosevelt Blvd., 446-9500. 1401 S. Orange Ave., Green Cove, 284-7789, larryssubs.com. F Larry’s piles ’em high, serves ’em fast; 36+ years. Hot & cold subs, soups. Some Larry’s serve breakfast. $ K TO B L D Daily METRO DINER, 2034 Kingsley Ave., 375-8548. F 2017 Best of Jax winner. Dinner nightly. SEE SAN MARCO. The ROADHOUSE, 231 Blanding Blvd., 264-0611, roadhouseonline.net. Sandwiches, wings, burgers, quesadillas for 35+ years. 75+ imported beers. Live music. $ FB L D Daily SPRING PARK COFFEE, 328 Ferris St., Green Cove Springs, 531-9391, springparkcoffee.com. Cozy shop; fresh-roasted Brass Tacks coffee, handcrafted hot & cold drinks, specialty lattes, cappuccino, macchiato, teas, pastries, sandwiches, breakfast. $ B L D Daily
PONTE VEDRA BEACH
AL’S PIZZA, 635 A1A, 543-1494. F 2017 Best of Jax winner. SEE INTRACOASTAL. LARRY’S GIANT SUBS, 830 A1A N., Ste. 6, 273-3993. F SEE ORANGE PARK. M SHACK NOCATEE, 641 Crosswater Pkwy., 395-3575. 2017 Best of Jax winner. SEE BEACHES. METRO DINER, 340 Front St., Ste. 700, 513-8422. F 2017 Best of Jax winner. SEE SAN MARCO.
RIVERSIDE, 5 PTS + WESTSIDE
13 GYPSIES, 887 Stockton St., 389-0330, 13gypsies.com. 2017 Best of Jax winner. Authentic Mediterranean cuisine: chorizo, tapas, blackened cod, pork skewers, coconut mango curry chicken. Breads from scratch. $$ BW L D Tu-Sa, R Sa AL’S PIZZA, 1620 Margaret St., Ste. 201, 388-8384. F 2017 Best of Jax winner. SEE INTRACOASTAL. BIG OAK BBQ & CATERING, 1948 Henley Rd., Middleburg, 214-3041. 1440 Dunn Ave., 757-2225, bigoakbbqfl.com. Family-owned-and-operated barbecue joints have smoked chicken, pulled pork, ribs, sides and stumps, which sounds damn good. $$ K TO L D M-Sa BLACK SHEEP, 1534 Oak St., 355-3793, blacksheep5points. com. 2017 Best of Jax winner. New American, Southern; local source ingredients. Specials, rooftop bar. HH. $$$ FB R Sa & Su; L M-F; D Nightly BOLD BEAN COFFEE ROASTERS, 869 Stockton St., Ste. 1, 855-1181, boldbeancoffee.com. 2017 Best of Jax winner. Small-batch, artisanal approach to sourcing and roasting single-origin, direct-trade coffees. Signature blends, handcrafted syrups, espressos, craft beers. $ BW TO B L Daily CORNER TACO, 818 Post St., 240-0412, cornertaco.com. Made-from-scratch “Mexclectic street food,” tacos, nachos, gluten-free, vegetarian options. $ BW L D Tu-Su CUMMER CAFÉ, Cummer Museum of Art & Gardens, 829 Riverside Ave., 356-6857, cummer.org. 2017 Best of Jax winner. Light lunch, quick bites, locally roasted coffee, espresso-based drinks, sandwiches, desserts, daily specials. Dine in or in gardens. $ BW K L D Tu; L W-Su EUROPEAN STREET CAFÉ, 2753 Park St., 384-9999. 2017 Best of Jax winner. 130+ import beers, 20 on tap. Sandwiches. Dine outside at some E-Sts. $ BW K L D Daily
GRASSROOTS NATURAL MARKET, 2007 Park St., 384-4474, thegrassrootsmarket.com. F 2017 Best of Jax winner. Juice bar uses certified organic fruits, veggies. Artisanal cheeses, 300 craft, import beers, 50 organic wines, produce, meats, vitamins, herbs, wraps, sides, sandwiches. $ BW TO B L D Daily HAWKERS ASIAN STREET FARE, 1001 Park St., 508-0342, hawkerstreetfare.com. 2017 Best of Jax winner. Authentic dishes from mobile stalls: BBQ pork char sui, beef haw fun, Hawkers baos, chow faan, grilled Hawker skewers. $ BW TO L D Daily IL DESCO, 2665 Park St., 290-6711, ildescojax.com. Authentic Italian cuisine; wood-fired pizzas, pasta, baked Italian dishes, raw bar, spaghetti tacos. Daily HH. $$-$$$ FB K TO L D Daily JOHNNY’S DELI & GRILLE, 474 Riverside Ave., 356-8055. F Casual spot offers made-to-order sandwiches, wraps. $ TO B L M-Sa LARRY’S GIANT SUBS, 1509 Margaret St., 674-2794. 7895 Normandy Blvd., 781-7600. 8102 Blanding Blvd., 779-1933. F SEE ORANGE PARK. METRO DINER, 4495 Roosevelt Blvd., 999-4600. F 2017 Best of Jax winner. SEE SAN MARCO. MOON RIVER PIZZA, 1176 Edgewood Ave. S., 389-4442. F 2017 Best of Jax winner. SEE AMELIA ISLAND. M SHACK, 1012 Margaret St., 423-1283. 2017 Best of Jax winner. SEE BEACHES. SOUTHERN ROOTS FILLING STATION, 1275 King St., 513-4726, southernrootsjax.com. 2017 Best of Jax winner. Fresh vegan fare; local, organic ingredients. Specials, on bread, local greens/rice, change daily. Sandwiches, coffees, teas. $ Tu-Su SUN-RAY CINEMA, 1028 Park St., 359-0047, sunraycinema.com. 2017 Best of Jax winner. First-run, indie and art films screened. Beer, local drafts, wine, pizza–Godbold, Black Lagoon Supreme–hot dogs, hummus, sandwiches, popcorn, nachos, brownies. $$ BW Daily SUSHI CAFÉ, 2025 Riverside Ave., Ste. 204, 384-2888, sushicafejax.com. F Monster, Rock-n-Roll, Dynamite Roll. Hibachi, tempura, katsu, teriyaki. Inside/patio. $$ BW L D Daily
ST. AUGUSTINE
AL’S PIZZA, 1 St. George St., 824-4383. F 2017 Best of Jax winner. SEE INTRACOASTAL. The CORAZON CINEMA & CAFE, 36 Granada St., 679-5736, corazoncinemaandcafe.com. Sandwiches, combos, salads and pizza are served at the cinema house, showing indie and first-run movies. $$ Daily CRUISERS GRILL, 3 St. George St., 824-6993. SEE BEACHES. THE FLORIDIAN, 72 Spanish St., 829-0655, thefloridianstaug.com. Updated Southern fare; fresh, local ingredients. Vegetarian, gluten-free options. Signature fried green tomato bruschetta, blackened fish cornbread stack; grits w/shrimp/fish/tofu. $$$ BW K TO L D W-M GYPSY CAB COMPANY, 828 Anastasia Blvd., 824-8244, gypsycab.com. F 34+ years. Varied urban cuisine menu changes twice daily. Signature: Gypsy chicken. Seafood, tofu, duck, veal. $$ FB R Su; L D Daily MARDI GRAS SPORTS BAR, 123 San Marco Ave., 347-3288, mardibar.com. Lively spot has wings, nachos, shrimp, chicken, Phillys, sliders, soft pretzels. $$ FB TO L D Daily METRO DINER, 1000 S. Ponce de Leon Blvd., 758-3323. F 2017 Best of Jax winner. Dinner nightly. SEE SAN MARCO. MOJO OLD CITY BBQ, 5 Cordova St., 342-5264, mojobbq. com. 2017 Best of Jax winner. SEE AVONDALE. SALT LIFE FOOD SHACK, 321 A1A, 217-3256. SEE BEACHES. WOODPECKER’S BACKYARD BBQ, 4930 S.R. 13, 531-5670, woodpeckersbbq.weebly.com. Smoked fresh daily. Brisket, ribs, pork, sausage, turkey: in sandwiches, plates by the pound. 8 sauces, 10 sides. $$ TO L D Tu-Su
SAN MARCO + SOUTHBANK
THE BEARDED PIG SOUTHERN BBQ & BEER GARDEN, 1224 Kings Ave., 619-2247, thebeardedpigbbq.com. 2017 Best of Jax finalist. Barbecue joint Southern style: brisket, pork, chicken, sausage, beef; veggie platters. $$ BW K TO Daily BISTRO AIX, 1440 San Marco Blvd., 398-1949, bistrox.com. F Mediterranean/French inspired menu changes seasonally. 250+ wines. Wood-fired oven-baked, grilled specialties: pizza, pasta, risotto, steaks, seafood. Hand-crafted cocktails, specialty drinks. Dine outside. HH M-F. $$$ FB L D Daily BOLD BEAN COFFEE ROASTERS, 1905 Hendricks Ave. 2017 Best of Jax winner. SEE RIVERSIDE. EUROPEAN STREET CAFÉ, 1704 San Marco Blvd., 398-9500. 2017 Best of Jax winner. SEE RIVERSIDE. FUSION SUSHI, 1550 University Blvd. W., 636-8688, fusionsushijax.com. F Upscale; fresh sushi, sashimi, hibachi, teriyaki, katsu, seafood. $$ K L D Daily HAVANA-JAX CAFÉ/CUBA LIBRE BAR, 2578 Atlantic Blvd., 399-0609, havanajax.com. 2017 Best of Jax winner. Bite Club certified. Cuban sandwiches are the real thing: big, thick, flattened. Traditional fare: black beans & rice, plantains, steaks, seafood, chicken & rice, roast pork. Spanish wine, drink specials, mojitos, Cuba libres. Nonstop HH. $ FB K L D Daily KITCHEN ON SAN MARCO, 1402 San Marco Blvd., 396-2344, kitchenonsanmarco.com. 2017 Best of Jax winner. Gastropub serves local, national craft beers, specialty cocktails. Seasonal menu, with fresh, locally sourced ingredients. $$ FB R Su; L D Daily METRO DINER, 3302 Hendricks Ave., 398-3701, metrodinercom. F 2017 Best of Jax winner. Original upscale diner in a historic 1930s-era building. Meatloaf, chicken pot pie, soups. This one serves dinner nightly. $$ B R L D Daily TAVERNA, 1986 San Marco Blvd., 398-3005, tavernasanmarco.com. 2017 Best of Jax winner. Chef Sam Efron’s authentic Italian; tapas, wood-fired pizza. Seasonal local produce, meats. Craft beer (some local), award-winning wine. $$$ FB K TO R L D Daily
SOUTHSIDE + TINSELTOWN
ALHAMBRA THEATRE & DINING, 12000 Beach Blvd., 641-1212, alhambrajax.com. 2017 Best of Jax winner. Open 50 years. Executive Chef DeJuan Roy’s themed menus. Reservations. $$ FB D Tu-Su EUROPEAN STREET CAFÉ, 5500 Beach Blvd., 398-1717. 2017 Best of Jax winner. SEE RIVERSIDE. LARRY’S SUBS, 3611 St. Johns Bluff Rd. S., 641-6499. 4479 Deerwood Lake Pkwy., 425-4060. F SEE ORANGE PARK. MARIANAS GRINDS, 11380 Beach Blvd., Ste. 10, 206-612-6596. Pacific Islander fare, chamorro culture. Soups, stews, fitada, beef oxtail, katden pika; empanadas, lumpia, chicken relaguen, BBQ-style ribs, chicken. $$ TO B L D Tu-Su M SHACK, 10281 Midtown Pkwy., 642-5000. 2017 Best of Jax winner. SEE BEACHES.
SPRINGFIELD + NORTHSIDE
ANDY’S GRILL, 1810 W. Beaver St., 354-2821, jaxfarmersmarket.com. 2017 Best of Jax finalist. Inside Jax Farmers Market. Local, regional, international produce. Breakfast, sandwiches. $ B L D M-Sa LARRY’S GIANT SUBS, 12001 Lem Turner Rd., 764-9999. SEE ORANGE PARK. UPTOWN KITCHEN & BAR, 1303 Main St. N., 355-0734, uptownmarketjax.com. Bite Club certified. Fresh fare, innovative menus, farm-to-table selections, daily specials. $$ BW TO B L Daily
TASTES LIKE
CHEFFED-UP
VANILLA
SKY
OFTEN, THE BEST TEACHERS ARE THE ONES WHO can tell a splendid story. I’m sure most of y’all can still remember a favorite instructor from your classroom days, and I bet most of those teachers could spin a really good yarn. Just like those paragons of education, I always try to inject a few good tales into my cooking instructions as a way of bringing students around to my way of thinking about food. The idea is to keep the spiels light and fun by using very descriptive, colorful language. Why is this important? Because the last thing I want someone to do is describe my classes as vanilla. Wait! Hold the phone! Why wouldn’t I want my classes described as vanilla? Vanilla is anything but bland. Think about this for a second: Vanilla is actually one of the most sought-after ingredients on the planet. It’s also the second-most expensive spice available—saffron’s the apex. Yet we Americans treat this rare, exotic treasure as if it were as common as a Caesar salad on a lunch menu. How absurd! Vanilla is thought to have originated on Mexico’s east coast. By the 15th century, it had become popular with the Aztecs—well, not quite as popular as sacrificing virgins, but what is? The Aztecs used the vanilla as a complementary flavor component in their hot chocolate. Delicious! The infamous Cortez was the one who brought the first vanilla beans to Europe. By the 18th century, the French were using vanilla as an ice cream flavoring. From there, French pastry chefs began to exploit the stunning flavor of this mysterious spice and Chef Up all sorts of delicate treats. My favorite U.S. president, Thomas Jefferson, is credited with turning the Colonies on to the joys of vanilla ice cream, to which they soon became addicted. Today, that vanilla addiction continues in America, though not only in ice cream. We also use vanilla to elevate most baked
You’ll never call it ‘PLAIN’ again
goods, such as cakes, cookies–even sauces. Using vanilla beans as a base ingredient became so popular and expensive, alternatives have been introduced. The first was vanilla extract, made by simply steeping used vanilla beans in alcohol; because of its intensity, only a tiny amount of this elixir is required. Chemists developed the second proxy, a nasty, illflavored, putrid potion of Satan. And, no, shoemakers, chemists are not renowned for having exceptional palates. Imitation vanilla will ruin the whole essence of any or all your baked goodies. Don’t use it! Go ahead and say my classes are vanilla. And try this Anglaise sauce as well. Sublime.
CHEF BILL’S CRÈME ANGLAISE Ingredients: • 1 cup heavy cream • 1 cup milk • 7 tbsp. sugar • 1 vanilla bean, split • 5 egg yolks
Directions: 1. Heat the milk and cream, with half 1. the vanilla bean and 4 tbsp. of sugar, 1. to a simmer. 2. Remove from heat, infuse for 1. 30 minutes. Scrape in the seeds, 1. discard the pod. 3. Whisk the egg yolks with the 1. remaining 3 tbsp. of sugar to a 1. ribbon consistency. 4. Reheat the cream and slowly temper 1. into the egg yolks. 5. Strain Until we cook again, Chef Bill Thompson cheffedup@folioweekly.com ___________________________________ Contact Chef Bill Thompson, owner of The Amelia Island Culinary Academy, at cheffedup@folioweekly.com to find inspiration and get you Cheffed Up!
DECEMBER 13-19, 2017 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | 41
PET PARENTING FOLIO LIVING DEAR
DAVI
365 DO-GOOD DAYS Calendar fundraiser benefits creatures BIG AND SMALL
D
uring the holidays, some dogs are busy making a mess, but I’m all about making a difference. With so many ways to spread a little love and cheer this time of year (and all year long), it’d be silly not to show you care. One of the most beautiful things about the holiday season is that it inspires folks to be a little nicer and a little more giving and to treat each other better—and that includes animals. EPIC Outreach’s mission is to share
Giving Back: PPOM has helped thousands of folks with pet care needs and preserves the bond between hospice patients and their pets through the patient’s end-of-life journey. petpeaceofmind.org, communityhospice.com
Baloo
MEET BALOO
information to inspire compassion to create a kinder world for people, animals and the environment. The nonprofit (epicoutreach.org) created Posing for Paws, a fun fundraising calendar representing kindness. The featured creatures—homeless pets from local shelters and people in the community who give back—know the power of generosity. Each month, there’s a wagworthy tale to tell. I like to think of this calendar as a way to inspire us to adopt pets and get involved in the community. Change can happen in hearts and minds when it’s least expected. Donations from the calendar fund EPIC’s efforts to make a difference for all living things through education, outreach, helping local pets and people and teaching kids to be kind to pets. To score your 2018 calendar, go to posingforpaws.info.
MEET BELLA
After my owner passed away, I was rescued by Pet Peace of Mind, a national hospice and palliative care program that partners with local hospices; in Northeast Florida, that’s Community Hospice of NE Florida. They supported me while my mom was ill, and now they’re sheltering me until a foster family or an adoptive parent takes me home.
My name’s Baloo, and I’m Pit Bull proud, shattering stereotypes left and right but, despite my handsome muzzle and playful personality, I’m often overlooked or misjudged. I’m bummed, but not surprised, ’cause haters gonna hate. Lucky for me, PitStop Pit Bull Rescue Transport is searching for the right person to be my family and friend. I’m strong and solid, and so full of love, I’ve got to give some to … you? Giving Back: PPBRT provides transport services from kill shelters to rescues, fosters and adopters all along the East Coast, as well as medical, boarding and training sponsorships. pspbrt.org
MEET CINNAMON
Some say I have a spicy style. It takes knowing and loving yourself to have the élan to do your own thing; that’s what the Friends of Clay County Animals taught me. This life-changing organization’s mission is fundraising for Clay County shelter animals to receive medical care and place pets in loving homes. Pets are family, after all. Giving Back: Through fundraising and public education, FOCCA is able to assist with medical care, enrich the shelter environment, promote adoptions, reduce the practice of euthanasia and educate folks about responsible ownership. friendsofclaycountyanimals.org Davi mail@folioweekly.com ____________________________________ Davi the dachshund is ready, willing and wagging to be a cover model.
PET TIP: BIG BOYS NEED ED LOVE, TOO A ST. BERNARD IS THE FURRY, SLOBBERY CANINE REINCARNATION of the late, great John Candy. Large in stature and gifted with a warm, humorous and lovable personality, St. Bernards are the best when you need a snuggle buddy on a chilly day. Sounds ideal, but there’s a catch. The bigger the animal, the bigger the food, and the bigger the, uh, output. Topping out at 180 pounds, ol’ Hooch can pack it in with the best of them. And no apartments for this breed. A St. Bernard in a small space is like a dinosaur in a theme park—and we all saw how that turned out. 42 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | DECEMBER 13-19, 2017
LOCAL PET EVENTS READ WITH SPIRIT THE DOG • School-age kids can practice reading skills with to Spirit, a real, live therapy dog who loves to listen, 2:30-3:30 p.m. Wednesday, Dec. 13 at Beaches Branch Library, 600 Third St., Neptune Beach, 241-1141, jaxpubliclibrary.org. BINGO FOR ANA’S ANGELS ANIMAL RESCUE • Help support rescue efforts for homeless animals in this area. Proceeds benefit Ana’s Angels. Rumor has it that it’s also an Ugly Christmas Sweater event, so … 7:30 p.m. Dec. 18 at Hamburger Mary’s, 3333 Beach Blvd., Ste. 1, St. Nicholas, 551-2048, hamburgermarys.com. MEMORIAL TILES • First Coast No More Homeless Pets offers the opportunity to honor the love and energy your pet gave you by purchasing a memorial tile, to be hung on the walls of FCNMHP’s Norwood Avenue clinic. You can personalize your tile with a message and a photo of the beloved pet that has died. Tiles are $100 each, are tax-deductible and funds go to support the work of FCNMHP. For details and the form to complete, go to fcnmhp.org.
ADOPTABLES
FONDUE
BONJOUR! I’m Fondue. Know how I got my name? Because I’ll totally melt your heart! <3 If you’re looking for a quiet, independent lady to share your life, I’d love to meet you. You’ll find me relaxing with my feline friends at Jacksonville Humane Society, 8464 Beach Blvd., Southside. ROADSIDE DONATION DRIVE • Be on the lookout this weekend for volunteers collecting funds or the animals at Clay County Humane Society. They’ll be at the confluence of Blanding Boulevard and Wells Road in Orange Park on Sat. and Sun., Dec. 16 and 17. Every little bit helps the good folks at CCHS, so give what you can. 276-7729, clayhumane.org. SANTA PHOTO OPS • You and your furever friend strike a pose for a digital portrait, 1-4 p.m. Saturday, Dec. 16 at Petco, 11900 Atlantic Blvd., Ste. 213, Intracoastal West, 997-8441; 11111 San Jose Blvd., Mandarin, 254-5715; 1514 C.R. 220, Fleming Island, 215-7498; 950 Marsh Landing Pkwy., Jax Beach, 273-0964; 430 CBL Dr., St. Augustine, 824-8520; 463713 S.R. 200, Yulee, 225-0014, petco.com. Check website for times, which are subject to change. And 100 percent of the $9.95 fee benefits local homeless pets through the Petco Foundation.
ADOPTABLES
MARIANNE
SWEET, WIGGLY PUP seeks fun-loving human for adventures and kisses. Likes: Chew toys, tennis balls, turkey. Loves: People of all ages, playing outside with my doggy pals. Could you be the one for me? Check out my profile at jaxhumane.org! KATZ 4 KEEPS ADOPTION DAYS • Adoption days for you to choose a new family member are 11 a.m.-3 p.m. Friday and Saturday, Dec. 15 and 16 and every Saturday and Sunday at 935B A1A N., Ponte Vedra Beach, 834-3223, katz4keeps.org. Katz 4 Keeps seeks volunteers, ages 18 and older, to help with its cat-centric programs; email peggyhatfield63@comcast.com. MEET SANTA! • The chain offers free photo ops with St. Nick himself, noon-4 p.m. Dec. 16 and 17 at PetSmart, 9515 Crosshill Blvd., Ste. 113, 777-8688; 8801 Southside Blvd., 519-8878; 10261 River Marsh Dr., 997-1335; 11700 San Jose Blvd., Ste. 19, 831-3466; 356 Monument Rd., 724-4600; 1956 Third St. S., Jax Beach, 853-2135; 1919 Wells Rd., 579-2362; 13141 City Station Dr., 696-0289; 1779 U.S. 1 S., St. Augustine, 495-0785, petsmart.com. _________________________________________ To list an event, send the name, time, date, location (complete street address, city), admission price, contact number/website to print, to mdryden@folioweekly.com
DECEMBER 13-19, 2017 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | 43
FREEWILL ASTROLOGY
DALE RATERMANN’s Folio Weekly Crossword presented by
YOUR BRAIN, NIGHTMARES, WOLFGANG AMADEUS MOZART & HERCULES
Serving Excellence Since 1928 Member American Gem Society
San Marco 2044 San Marco Blvd. 398-9741
Ponte Vedra
THE SHOPPES OF PONTE VEDRA
330 A1A North 280-1202
Avondale 3617 St. Johns Ave. 388-5406
FOLIO WEEKLY CROSSWORD 1
2
3
4
5
6
7
8
9
10
15
14 18
19
20
21
22
26
27
24 29
33
43
31
39
40
41
50
52 55
47
51
53
56
57
58
59
62
63
64
66
67
68
69
70
71
ACROSS
36 42
46
49
32
35
45
44 48
54
30
34 38
13
25
28
37
12
16
17
23
11
60
61
65
54 “Relax, bro”
23 ___ Harbour, Fla.
47 Ocean motion
57 Sidecar mixer
24 Casablanca role
49 “___ turn up”
31 Sucker 36 Tot’s cry
59 Roy G. ___
25 Type of ray
50 Ripley’s love
10 “In that case...”
62 TIME 2001
26 Slick trick
51 Beach bash
Person of the Year
27 Certain exams
54 Gunk
at JU?
28 Sen. Nelson,
55 Fashion’s Boss
for one
56 Between gigs
14 Antilles isle 15 Buried treasures 16 RAM veggie 17 Accessory for a UF smoker?
66 Unsightly 67 TPC rental
29 Zeniths
57 Iranian exile
68 A-list
30 Did a 5K
58 Grimm beast 59 Duval County
20 Help wanted sign
69 Bucks’ pursuits
31 Reef stuff
21 Sit for a bit
70 First Coast
32 “___ Got a Friend”
gym site
22 Hip scooter 23 Dallas, familiarly
71 Green-light
25 Virus, e.g. 26 Kingly authority at UNF? 33 Russian range 34 Have brunch at Horizons 35 “There!” 37 ___ Taylor Creek Preserve 38 It’s fact-filled 42 Be penitent 43 Writer Wiesel
31 32 33 34 35 36
36 Singer Alicia
60 A fan of
39 Hula hoops
61 Vista
DOWN
40 Big boys
63 1/100th div.
41 Shark bait
64 Meadow
Cul-de-___
44 Hires
65 Sick and tired
Nirvana, e.g. Hairpieces Farah org. U2 album Flagler College address ending
37 Part of NEA 38 Off! ingredient 39 Burnout result
45 Comics scream
10 Bootleg
46 Not light
11 ATF agents
48 Partly undissolvable
12 Creep out
substances at FSU?
Court payment
13 Southern side
52 Jags stats
18 Energy bits
53 Kind of luck
19 Egg, in a lab
44 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | DECEMBER 13-19, 2017
SOLUTION TO 12.6.17 PUZZLE D A R I A
A L O O P
H O P U P
O N E T I R C L A G O O F Y
A W A R E
M E T A L
S E E
A I P O E A L X L I P M E E A N S I P E 7 5 S S S E T L
I M N O T
1 A C R O S E S E R E O N S E N C A G R S E
0 S S U R M A N R A B A S E I 4 S T A O I D E S E S L P E T T
T U G S S N I P P I S A T M I A Y O N N A L L I T H E 9 O O K 5 L Y A R D L E E L I M A E V I L T E X T
ARIES (March 21-April 19): According to a Sufi aphorism, you can’t be sure you’re in possession of the righteous truth unless 1,000 people call you a heretic. If that’s accurate, you still have a way to go before you can be certified. You need more agitated defenders of the status quo to complain that your thoughts and actions don’t align with conventional wisdom. Go get ’em! Ironically, those grumblers should push you just enough to get a total grasp of the colorful, righteous truth. TAURUS (April 20-May 20): I undertook a diplomatic mission to the disputed borderlands where your nightmares built a hideout. I convinced them to put down their slingshots, blowguns and flamethrowers, and I struck a deal so they’ll free their hostages. In return, all you’ve got to do is listen to them rant and rage a while, then hug them. Drawing on my extensive demon-whisperer experience, I decree they resorted to extreme acts because they wanted more of your attention. So grant them that small wish. GEMINI (May 21-June 20): Ever been wounded by a person you cared for deeply? Most of us have. Has that hurt reduced your capacity to care deeply for others? Probably. If you suspect you harbor lingering damage, the next six weeks will be a good time to take dramatic measures to address it. You’ll have good intuition about finding the kind of healing to really work. You’ll be braver and stronger than usual when you weaken the past’s power to harm intimacy and togetherness in the here-and-now. CANCER (June 21-July 22): “Your task is not to seek for love, but merely to seek and find all the barriers within yourself that you have built against it,” wrote Helen Schuman in A Course in Miracles. I don’t agree with the first part of that advice. If done with grace and generosity, seeking love can be fun and educational. It can inspire us to escape limitations and expand charm. I do agree that one of the best ways to make ourselves open to love is to hunt down and destroy the barriers we built against it. I expect 2018 to be a fantastic time for us Cancerians to do this holy work. Get started! LEO (July 23-Aug. 22): In the coming months, you’ll have substantial potential to cultivate a deeper, richer sense of home. Here’s how to take maximum advantage: 1. Plan to move into your dream home, or transform your current one so it’s more like your dream home. 2. Get a new mirror that reflects your beauty the best possible ways. 3. Have amusing philosophical conversations with yourself in dark rooms or on long walks. 4. Get a new stuffed animal or magic talisman for cuddling. 5. Once a month, when the moon’s full, dance with your shadow. 6. Expand and refine your relationship with pleasure. 7. Boost and give thanks for the people, animals and spirits that help you stay strong and safe. VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22): Deuces are wild. Contradictions will turn out to be unpredictably useful. Substitutes may be more fun than what they replace, and copies may be better than originals. Repetition lets you get what you couldn’t or didn’t get the first time. Your patron saint will be an acquaintance of mine, Jesse Jesse. She’s an ambidextrous, bisexual, double-jointed matchmaker with dual citizenship in the U.S. and Ireland. I trust you Virgos will be able to summon at least some of her talent to go both ways. You may be able to have your cake and eat it, too. LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 22): Your brain’s reptilian part keeps you alert, makes sure you do what’s needed to survive and provides aggression and
power you need to fulfill your agendas. Your limbic brain motivates engaging in meaningful give-and-take with others. It’s the source of emotions and urges to nurture. The neocortex part of the grey matter is where your life’s planned. According to my astrological analysis, all these centers of intelligence are working at their best. You may be as smart as you’ve ever been. How will you use this enhanced savvy? SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21): Classical composer and pianist Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart thought musicians could demonstrate their skills more vividly if they played quickly. During my rock singer career, I was often tempted to regard my rowdy, booming delivery as more powerful and interesting than my softer, sensitive approach. In the weeks ahead, you’ll rebel against these ideas. According to my astrological omen-reading, you’re more likely to have meaningful experiences if you’re subtle, gentle, gradual and crafty. SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21): At one point in his life, mythical Greek hero Hercules was made to carry out a series of 12 strenuous labors. Many were glamorous adventures: engaging in hand-to-hand combat with a monstrous lion, liberating the god Prometheus–who’d been so kind to humans–from being tortured by an eagle; and visiting a magical orchard to procure golden apples that conferred immortality when eaten. Hercules also had to do a less-exciting task: clean up the dung of 1,000 oxen, whose stables hadn’t been mucked out in 30 years. In 2018, your own hero’s journey may resemble Hercules’ Twelve Labors. CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19): Humans have used petroleum as a fuel since ancient times. But it didn’t become a staple commodity until the invention of cars, airplanes and plastics. Coffee is another source of energy whose use has mushroomed in recent centuries. The first European coffee shop was in Rome in 1645. Today there are more than 25,000 Starbucks on the planet. In the months ahead, you’ll experience an analogous development. A resource of minor or no importance until now could begin to become essential. Do you have a sense of what it is? Sniff around. AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18): I’m not totally sure events in 2018 will lift you to the Big Time or the Major League. But I do believe you’ll at least have an appointment with a bigger time or a more advanced minor league than your current level. Are you ready to perform duties with more confidence and competence? Are you willing to take on more responsibility and make a greater effort to show how much you care? You can’t afford to be breezy and casual about this chance to seize more authority. It has the potential to either steal or heal your soul, so take it very seriously. PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20): In 1865, England’s Royal Geographical Society decided to call the world’s highest mountain “Everest,” borrowing the surname of Welsh surveyor George Everest. Long before that, though, the Nepali called it Sagarm¥th¥ and Tibetans referred to it as Chomolungma. In 2018, use those earlier names if you talk about that famous peak. It may help keep you in the right frame of mind as you attend to three assignments: 1. Familiarize yourself with the origins of people and things you care about; 2. Reconnect with influences present at the beginnings of important developments in your life; 3. Look for the authentic qualities beneath gloss, pretense and masks.
Rob Brezsny freewillastrology@freewillastrology.com
NEWS OF THE WEIRD EYES WIDE OPEN
Chengdu, China, street barber Xiong Gaowu offers an unusual service at his roadside shop in Sichuan province. For $12, Xiong will scrape the inside of his customers’ eyelids using a straight razor, according to Reuters. Xiong suggests being “gentle, very, very gentle” when performing eyelid shaving, or “blade wash eyes,” as the technique is known in Mandarin. A Chengdu ophthalmologist, Qu Chao, says shaving may unblock moisturizing sebaceous glands along the rim of the eyelid, leading to a more comfortable and refreshed feeling. “If he can properly sterilize the tools that he uses, I can see there is still a space for this technique to survive,” Qu added.
“bring the sheep home” a little too literally in early November when he herded nine sheep into his owner’s kitchen. “I was in the kitchen and heard a noise,” Rocky’s owner, Rosalyn Edwards, told the BBC. “I turned around and the sheep were just standing there. It was funny at the time, but then there was quite a lot of wee, poo and mud everywhere.” The sheep stood around for a few minutes, then allowed themselves to be shown out the front door.
WACKY ALASKANS
Traffic slowed to a crawl on I-95 in Palm Beach County on Nov. 21 as President Trump’s motorcade arrived for the Thanksgiving holiday. Author and sportswriter Jeff Pearlman was among the delayed drivers, but things turned weird when “these people [kept] getting out of the car dancing,” he posted in a Twitter video. WPTV reported Pearlman recorded people two cars in front of him twerking on the highway, then jumping and dancing around before getting back in the car.
Stacy Scott of Anchorage, Alaska, arrived home Nov. 24 to find thousands of dollars’ worth of clothing and jewelry missing, along with a signature item, George the mounted zebra head, a gift from a friend. The thief was bold enough to call a taxi to use as the getaway car and put the zebra head in its trunk—all this was caught on surveillance camera at Scott’s home. Anchorage police tracked down and arrested Desiree Fuller, 38, for felony burglary and theft, and recovered most of Scott’s items. But George remained at large until the cab driver saw a story on KTVA-TV and contacted them—he’d been holding the zebra hostage because Fuller didn’t pay the fare. In the spirit of the season, George is home for the holidays.
IS THIS HEAVEN? IF YOU’RE A DEER IT IS
YOUR BODY’S A TEMPLE AND YOU SHOT IT!
TRUMP JUMP
In Iowa, autumn is breeding season for deer; they can get a little wacky and try to cross roads. It’s also the time of year when the Iowa Department of Transportation fields questions from drivers asking why deer crossing signs aren’t erected at safer spots for deer to cross. “This sign isn’t intended to tell deer where to cross,” the Iowa DOT helpfully posted on its Facebook page on Oct. 24, according to the Des Moines Register. “It’s for drivers to be alert that deer have been in this area in the past.” State Farm Insurance reports Iowa drivers have the fourth-highest likelihood in the U.S. of hitting a deer. Coincidence?
THAT’S WHY THEY’RE CALLED SHEEP
Rocky, an enterprising 7-month-old border collie in Devon, England, took the command
Folio Weekly helps you connect with the paramour of your dreams. Go to folioweekly.com/i-saw-u.html, fill out the FREE form correctly (40 words or fewer, dammit) by 5 p.m. Friday (for the next Wednesday’s FW) – next stop: Bliss!
As elder members of the First United Methodist Church in Tellico Plains, Tennessee, gathered on Nov. 16 to discuss the recent church shooting in Sutherland Springs, Texas, someone asked if anyone had brought a gun to church. One man said he carries a gun everywhere, reported WATE-TV, and produced the gun, emptying the chambers before passing the weapon around. When the owner got the gun back, he replaced the magazine and recharged the chamber, accidentally squeezing the trigger and shooting himself in the hand and his wife in the abdomen. Both victims were taken by helicopter to the University of Tennessee Medical Center for treatment of non-lifethreatening injuries. weirdnewstips@amuniversal.com
DEC. 14 is MONKEY DAY and DEC. 19 is UNDERDOG DAY! We see a weird harmony here applicable to your singularity. Quit your simian antics; get real about finding forever love. You see someone on a crowded open mic night and violins begin to play … yet it’s just Shackelford onstage, again. Buck up, Slugger; the entire FW Ed Staff has the sitch in hand. You’ll make sweet music together in no time.
So keep calm and go to folioweekly.com/i-saw-u.html and: One:
Write a five-word headline so the person recalls that starstruck moment, like: “ISU at Jax Zoo’s Reptile Building.” Two: Describe the person, like, “You: Too far away from the Great Apes exhibit to be able to see me, hanging by one arm from a Seashore Palm.” Three: Describe yourself, like, “Me: Screeching for you to run through Stingray Bay, bypass the bears and meet me by the monkeys.” Four: Describe the moment, like, “We finally met on the Wildlife Carousel, me on the majestic elephant and you riding the anteater. The anteater.” Five: Meet, fall in love, sponsor a ZooLoop Brick.* No names, emails, websites, etc. And HEY, it’s 40 words or fewer. Get a love life with Folio Weekly ISUs! BEAUTIFUL DRESS, STOCKINGS You: In cute dress, with bow pattern, black cute-patterned stockings. I sat two tables from you and noticed you walk by me to sit down. We briefly noticed each other as I walked out. When: Dec. 7. Where: JTB Chicken Salad Chick. #1683-1213
HEY WHOOPING COUGH You: Ryan Gosling has nothing on you, esp when it comes to good advice. You said try Robitussin–I’d rather try you. Me: Getting over a cold, hope I didn’t ruin your movie. Meet for “coughee” sometime? When: Oct. 6. Where: “Blade Runner,” Sun-Ray. #1675-1011
AIRPORT CUTIE You: Dark hair, slim, black shirt, gray pants, Nixon backpack. Me: Curvy, curly short hair, leggings, leather backpack. Went to Cali same day; back same day. Wanted convo; didn’t see you. Captivating aura. Who/where are you? Don’t go! When: Nov. 15. Where: Jax Intl. Airport. #1682-1206
I’VE BEEN WAITING FOR YOU You: Walk your dog near my bush most nights. Thick guy, short legs I’d love to gnaw. Me: Watching you for months. Tried popping out to say hi last week, but I scared you. Happens sometimes. When: Oct. 3. Where: Ortega. #1673-1011
IN PURGATORY WITHOUT YOU You: Working D&B’s counter; took time to find me a cool card. Me: Wearing Purgatory Co. shirt; agreed Purgatory’s a strange name for beautiful place. I’d love to get lost in your eyes once more. When: Nov. 19. Where: Dave & Buster’s. #1681-1222
THINGS I’D LIKE TO DO With you. Take you into the woods. No sleeping bag, no tent. Want to lie under the stars and watch a meteor shower while we talk about nothing and everything. And wait for the rain. When: Aug. 26. Where: Shantytown. #1672-1004
HAGAR CONCERT ENCOUNTER We met at Sammy Hagar, talked; you and bro came over. Looked for you again, didn’t find. Tried to find at Jags game; couldn’t. Meet sometime? I’d like that. My name starts with M; yours with T. When: Nov. 11. Where: St. Augustine Amphitheatre. #1680-1122
YOU LOVE ART, MUSIC, NATURE I like slow cooking, good people. Want to stay up all night, play Nintendo, eat junk food, hike outside the city at sunrise; then be too busy to see you for a while. Or fish. When: Lomax Street. Where: June 11, 2010. #1671-1004
I THINK WE’RE ALONE NOW Me: Playing guitar, singing at Super Food. You: Entered alone, said you’d stay for one song, asked for my card, last name. I played “I Think We’re Alone Now.” I’m on Facebook. Should’ve asked your number. When: Nov. 1. Where: Super Food & Brew, Downtown. #1679-1108 MAN IN UNIFORM AT TARGET You: In Navy uniform, buying bleach at self-checkout. Me: Laughing at orange makeup with elderly mom. ISU in parking lot, new black Ram. Severely regret not saying hello. This is worth trying. When: Oct. 31. Where: Target, Beach & Hodges. #1678-1108 SEEKING MY “WOOD” ISU bum a smoke after Florida-Georgia. Noticed your sad eyes, New Balances, tube socks. We talked. You: Frat boy, pleated shorts; name ends in “wood.” Me: blonde, dirty martini, looking for love in all the wrong places. When: Oct. 29. Where: Mellow Mushroom Avondale. #1677-1108 NURSE ME TO HEALTH You: Misplaced duck living in the inky waters of gator land. Me: Furry, educated, feral. Told me how you left your true love back home. I’d let you hold the leash if we go on walks. When: Oct. 10. Where: Aardwolf Brewery. #1676-1108
LIGHTNING STRIKE AT MARKET You: Gorgeous brunette, tank top, camo pants, heels, shopping with young son on Saturday. Butcher made you laugh. Me: Serious, cop-looking guy trying to make eye contact. I’d love to shop with you. When: Sept. 16. Where: Earth Fare, Atlantic Blvd. #1670-0920 HURRICANE IRMA COLD BREW In line at Publix stocking up for Irma; you noticed my organic, dark roast cold brew. It piqued your interest, you wanted it, so I gave it to you. But you piqued my interest ... When: Sept. 5. Where: Riverside Publix. #1669-0920 HOME DEPOT RETURN LINE CUTIE You: Dark hair, great smile. Me: Blonde, special order counter with friend. A gentleman, you let us go first. We made eye contact, you smiled at me as I left. Meet for drinks? When: Aug. 31. Where: Southside Home Depot. #1668-0906 I SA U ConnexioW n Made!
I’LL ALWAYS COME BACK FOR YOU You: Prideful, emotionally hidden, distant from those closest, but ISU in a way others didn’t. Me: Love to travel, low self-esteem, brunette. No matter where I am, I’ll always come back for you. When: July 19, 2016. Where: Hospital. #1667-0830
*or any other appropriate site at which folks can engage in a civil union or marriage or whatever … DECEMBER 13-19, 2017 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | 45
M.D. M.J.
BE WARNED: MDMJ’s future may be troubling
REFLECTIONS ON A
GREEN YEAR
AS WE AP APPROACH PPROA PRROAACH TTHE HE EEND ND OOFF FL FLOR FLORIDA’S ORIID OR IDA’ A S FI FFIRST FIRS IRST full year as a medical marijuana state, it’s worth looking back in appreciation of what has been accomplished, and in consideration of what remains to be done. One person who won’t be appreciating anything, however, is Jeff Sessions, the perennially embattled U.S. Attorney General who once served as a middling senator from Alabama, a state that stands poised to replace Sessions with an accused pedophile named Roy Moore. Sessions has wisely refrained from comment on that matter, but he’s had plenty to say about marijuana in recent days. “I think it’s a big issue for America, for the country, and I’m of the general view that this is not a healthy substance,” he told a meeting of veteran drug warriors on Dec. 8. “And then have the policy response that we and the federal government needs to be prepared to take and do so appropriately and with good sense.” The Rohrabacher-Farr Amendment to the current appropriations bill prohibits Sessions from going after residents of states that have passed medical marijuana or similar laws, but with the next budget coming to vote on or before Dec. 22, it’s unclear if that provision will remain in effect. No doubt Sessions would prefer that it not. Sessions gave no indication of this during his confirmation hearing, because he was lying; he later confirmed that his office is looking at ways to reverse the trend. His remarks are troubling, not just because of the rank ignorance displayed on its face, but more important, because of the “unimpeachable” legal authority this rubber-faced rube carries with him. Let’s recall that, after a number of states passed medical marijuana laws in the 1990s, all that hard work was swiftly undone during the dark days of Dubya by another Attorney General, John Ashcroft. The Supreme Court backed his argument that federal prerogatives take precedence over states’ rights that conservatives held so dear, back before the states began moving in a liberal direction on all kinds of issues. That ruling, Gonzales v. Raich, led to swift rollback of the progress that had been made, opening the door to closing the door on thousands more citizens locked up on marijuana charges. This is where Sessions’ thinking is rooted, and for him to even talk in the direction of the subject should be cause for alarm, given this administration’s outsized esteem for its own selfinterest. As more states prepare to decriminalize or outright legalize next year, be warned: The feds are moving tentatively toward some measure of pushback, in forms as-yet-undetermined. Shelton Hull mail@folioweekly.com ___________________________________ Got questions about medical marijuana? Let us answer them. Email mail@folioweekly.com. 46 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | DECEMBER 13-19, 2017
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FOLIO OLIO OLIO O VO VOI VOICES OICES CES : BACKPAGE BACKPA C AGE G E EDITORIAL
BOILER
ROOM
Former call center worker calls out SO-CALLED CHARITY THE OLD FURNITURE WAREHOUSE IN ST. NICHOLAS had many of the characteristics of a modernday boiler room. It had been re-purposed, was dirty and ill-maintained. There were phone and electrical wires stretched across the floor in every direction, so much so you had to watch where you stepped for fear of knocking someone offline. The once-white computer monitors were all stained yellow from nicotine, obvious throwbacks from a bygone era; they sat atop mismatched well-worn desks which were scattered unevenly throughout three small rooms. A stray cat that someone had named “Bluff ” wandered in and out of the rooms through an open door, which led to the alley behind the building. Among the many things that didn’t make sense about the operation was the size of the building. Our outfit was sequestered at one end of the building, which represented only a fraction of its overall size. There were around 20 employees at any given time, the number was always changing, so the whole set-up could have fit in one suite of the infinite number of empty strip malls in Jacksonville. The mortgage for this place, much less the utility bill and property taxes, must have been murder. But as I learned later, all these mysteries were necessary aspects of a well-crafted scam which sucks perhaps as much as a million dollars a year out of the unsuspecting public. The grift was so subtle that it took me, an employee, several months to figure out. As a result of my ignorance, my production suffered to the point that I was sent home several times before my shift ended and was constantly on the verge of being fired. But I survived there for nearly a year, long after I figured out what I was doing was wrong. I could blame my temporary loss of scruples on economic necessity, but I’m afraid that might not be entirely true. There was something about accomplishing the unlikely that when I did make a sale, it gave me a great deal of satisfaction. That task was to cold-call three to four hundred people a day and convince them to “donate” at least $20 to the local police or firefighter unions. Sometimes their names and addresses would pop up on our screens and sometimes all we had to go on was a phone number. That meant that, in addition to squeezing a few bucks out of them, we also had to convince them to provide their names, addresses and preferably, their 16-digit credit card number and its expiration date. As you might imagine, this was no easy task. Whenever it did happen, which on a good day occurred four or five times, there was almost always a pause as the “sucker” on the other end of the line considered the ramifications of handing over such critical information to a complete stranger. During that
pause, my heart would begin to race, my hands would get sweaty, and once they started reading off those numbers, the endorphins in my brain would begin to flow like water from an open tap. Even now, years later, when I hear the sound of a woman unzipping her purse, I cop a fleeting buzz. After thanking them for their “donation,” we would get out of our seats and march triumphantly to the centrally located giant white board fastened to the wall and put a mark on a column with our name above it. We were paid based on the number of ‘sales’ we made and ownership made sure everyone knew which salesmen were doing well and which ones weren’t. When I use the word ‘salesmen,’ I do so not out of ignorance of political correctness, but because there were only men working there. In fact, whether or not you were considered for the job depended entirely upon how you sounded on the voicemail you left when you called the number, which was advertised on the side of the building where we worked. If your voice was deep and commanding, you were hired, it was that simple. I would learn later that this was yet another clue as to the nature of our scam. In the beginning, my lack of success was due to more than just the fact that I was well behind the curve; it was also because I had a hard time asking people for money and offering them nothing but a sticker in return. I didn’t believe in what I was doing. Most of the time, you could tell by the ZIP code in which they lived whether or not the people you were pitching had money or not. Though maybe as much as a third of the donations I scored were from elderly people living in low-income neighborhoods, sometimes I found myself rooting for them to just hang up or say “no thanks.” The question was forever lurking in my mind: Why should people of little means or living on fixed incomes be expected to supplement unions whose members enjoyed incomes much higher than the median of the average resident of Jacksonville? My evolution was by no means the norm— many of the guys took right to it on the first day. They were obviously unperturbed by ethical and moral questions. As I got know some of them, it became apparent that many of my co-workers were living in halfway houses, having recently been released from prison and still on probation. Ironically, this group did better on average than the rest of us and this fact was what led me to fully realize the deception on which the whole operation was based. Their success was due in some part to their familiarity with the criminal justice system. That is to say, they’d spent so much time around law enforcement, they could easily mimic them. When I was hired, I was never told to
say I was a cop or even told to try to sound like one. However, it slowly became apparent to me that the more authoritarian and controlling you sounded on the phone, the more your sales increased. So for eight hours a day, I became a crime-fighting archetype. I started by ditching my real name, which isn’t exactly masculine or identifiable. “Eric” sounded like the name of a soap opera character and “Mongar” was unfamiliar and sounded more like the name of a fish than a guy who would take a billy club to you over a broken taillight. At the time, I had been trying to get back in shape, so I was taking some of those supplements for men. I noticed that when I took them, my voice dropped an octave, so I started consuming them by the handful. I became more direct and demanding and stuck strictly to the script we were given to read. I realized that when delivered with the right attitude, I insinuated that I was indeed a cop. My sales increased dramatically. It seems impersonating a police officer on the streets will get you thrown in jail, but doing so on the phone shot you straight to the top of the “big board.” Sometimes people caught on to the scam and asked questions of us like: ‘Are you a cop?’ or ‘Where on Beach Boulevard are you located?’ or ‘What percentage of my donation goes to the union?’ Of the last question, we were to say 100 percent, which was technically true. The donations went first to the unions who then returned roughly two-thirds of the money to the owner of the business. One time, I did the math and I estimated that roughly $1 million a year was raised by this company. When asked if I was a cop, I never once answered yes; how my co-workers answered that question I cannot say. When asked about our location, I would simply repeat our address, but everyone knows that the police union building is also located on Beach Boulevard. Occasionally, if people were suspicious, we would offer to call them back from the “chief ’s” land-line. This number showed up on their caller ID as “Police Union.” Occasionally this is all it took; the next thing you knew, you were typing in a credit card number. Eventually, my conscience caught up with me and after a little more than a year, I just couldn’t do it anymore. I decided that the challenge of accomplishing the impossible and the money it produced wasn’t worth talking poor people, who are most often on the losing end of encounters with police, out of their hard-earned money. After all, I was one of them and there was something really seedy about pitting poor people against one another to benefit the people who got paid to keep us in line. Eric Mongar mail@folioweekly.com DECEMBER 13-19, 2017 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | 47