Tips for Enjoying Wine, or “Band-Aids for the Palate”

by bob Wesley

TEMPERATURES:

DO put a few small ice chips in your red wine if it’s served on the warmer side. Swirl them about and take a thermal reading. They won’t dilute the wine and they’ll quickly turn a tannin-studded red into something smoother in a few seconds. DO expect to be harshly taunted, condemned, and ostracized, however, if you fill a pint glass with ice cubes and Syrah. DON’T you dare...

DO place your white wine by the candle on the dinner table to warm it up if it’s served at Slushee-like temperatures. But, if your wine is served downright hot, it’s probably Christmastime, and somebody just handed you a glass of mulled vino. Don’t worry, it was assuredly contemptible swill to begin with and will most certainly taste better at 160 degrees with a cinnamon stick as a spoon.

MIXTURES:

Some evening you’ll encounter a series of reds that are simply palate assassins. Are you victimized by a South African Pinotage that tastes like rusty, iron-rich dirt? Has the monolithic Aussie Shiraz you waited years to enjoy become porty, oafish and formaldehyde-like? Did that ancient Bordeaux that was supposed to be bulletproof finally succumb to the inevitable weed, horse saddle and tar pit styled death it was always destined for?