PROPHET MUHAMMAD, PEACE AND BLESSINGS BE UPON HIM

Why Are Good Manners So Important?

“The best inheritance a parent leaves their children is good manners.” (Sunan at-Tirmidhi, Birr, 33).

Why Good Manners?

There is no other religion or system that gives as much importance to good manners as Islam. The noble Prophet said, “Islam is good manners.” Having good manners is the greatest sign of being a Muslim. There are many traditions of the noble Prophet encouraging good conduct. For example, “The most perfect in his faith among the believers is the one who has good manners.” The beloved Prophet, who emphasized the importance of good conduct over faith, conveys the means becoming close to him in the following tradition: “On the Day of Judgment the dearest and closest to me, as regard of my company, are those who bear the best moral character.”

In the Holy Qur’an, there are many verses encouraging good manners such as keeping one’s promises, forgiveness, humbleness, obeying parents, trustfulness, affection, brotherliness, peace, sincerity, generosity, compassion, tolerance, speaking with kindness, being good humored, and purity of heart.

In addition, there are also many verses of the Qur’an regarding avoiding bad manners and conduct such as oppression, ostentation, abusiveness, greed, selfishness, jealousy, pride, animosity, suspicion, waste and mischief-making, which also signifies the importance the Islamic faith gives to good manners and conduct. So why should we be well mannered? We can address this topic in a few paragraphs:

1. In addition to worship, the Islamic faith gives great importance particularly to social relations, and it is impossible for those who do not have good morals to live their religion to perfection.

2. Prophet Muhammad, peace and blessings be upon him, represented good manners. In order to become an inhabitant of Paradise, it is necessary to be adorned with his good morals. In the Qur’an, God conveys that the noble Prophet is the most excellent example for every believer. In another verse the Qur’an reveals, “You are surely of a sublime character” (al-Qalam 68:4). The only way a person can live like the Messenger of God is by emulating his excellent morals and conduct.

3. When a believer has good morals, he can be elevated to the level of those who are absorbed in worship. The noble Prophet defined this in one of the traditions in these words: “By his good character, a believer will attain the degree of one who prays during the night and fasts during the day.” This should not be misinterpreted. Worship is extremely important in terms of displaying servitude to God. But in addition, a believer who lives in a society must comply with the conduct necessary in relationships between people within that society. When he achieves this, or in other words, when he is a person of good manners and conduct, then his worship would have reached perfection.

4. Having good morals is the means by which a believer may enter Paradise. When a man asked the noble Prophet which act would lead the people into entering Paradise the most, he replied, “Piety and good manners,” which signifies the importance of good manners together with worship.

5. Good manners signify perfection and maturity in religion and faith. The noble Prophet identified two characteristics not found in a believer—greed and bad manners. Again, he affirmed that the best among believers regarding faith were those of good manners.

6. Good manners and conduct are also forms of servitude to God. In other words, having good manners is a form of worship. Indeed, the noble Prophet stated that the simplest forms of worship are refraining from speaking unnecessarily and good conduct.

7. Displaying good manners is a sign of love for God and His Messenger. This is clearly defined in the tradition stating that those closest to the Messenger of God on the Day of Judgment will be those of good conduct. When God loves His servant, He grants him good manners.

8. Good manners eliminate sin in the same way that the sun eliminates frost: good manners melt away sin as water melts ice. The noble Prophet explained that bad manners spoil a good deed just as vinegar spoils honey. Therefore, we should all recite this supplication of the noble Prophet: “O Lord! I ask You for health, restraint, trustworthiness, good character and contentment with the decree. O most Compassionate! I ask You to grant this by virtue of Your compassion.”

The noble Prophet Was Extremely Mild Mannered

The most important aspect of good character is gentleness and mild manners. Gentle manners are one of the most significant elements of a movement or action embedding in the heart. In the

Holy Qur’an, this characteristic of the noble Prophet is conveyed in these words:

It was by a mercy from God that . . . you (O Messenger) were lenient with them (your Companions). Had you been harsh and hard-hearted, they would surely have scattered away from about you. Then pardon them, pray for their forgiveness, and take counsel with them in the affairs (of public concern); and when you are resolved (on a course of action), put your trust in God. Surely God loves those who put their trust (in Him). (Al-Imran 3:159).

The noble Prophet was not only gentle and lenient while conveying his mission, but he was mild mannered in every aspect of his life. Anas—who was with the Messenger of God from a very young age, served him for many years and was granted his blessing—related these words regarding the noble Prophet:

The Messenger of God was the best of all people in his manners. One day when I was still a child and serving the Messenger of God, he sent me on an errand. And with a child’s impulse I began to play with some children I came across in the street. I was so occupied playing with them that I forgot to fulfill the duty given to me by the noble Prophet. Then after a while, the Messenger of God caught me by the back of the neck; I looked up at him and he said smiling, “Little Anas, did you go to the place I told you to go?”

I replied, “O Messenger of God, I am going now.”

Anas went on to say, “By God, I served him for nine years, and not once did he say to me, ‘Why did you do that?’ or ‘Why did you not do that?’ about something which I had not done.”

The beloved Prophet encouraged his followers to be gentle and kind. He defined mild manners in these words: “Gentleness adorns everything.” In another of his traditions, the noble Proph- et said, “Indeed God is gentle and loves gentleness, and gives due to gentleness that which He does not give to harshness.”

Universal Compassion

As defined at the beginning, the Messenger of God was a symbol of mercy from whom not only the believers, but also the disbelievers, polytheists and the whole of mankind, benefitted. Believers reaped his knowledge and wisdom, because he said, “I am closer to believers than their own selves.” Believers have more love and affection for him than they do for themselves; and he equally loved those who harbored deep affection for him, because he was a man of immense kindness and gentleness. This was affection of reason and logic. In other words, this emotion of love was based on spiritual knowledge and depth of wisdom. If this affection is embedded in the heart, it flourishes to the extent that the individual searches for the Messenger of God everywhere, just as a lover searched for his beloved. He continues to search, and every time the beloved one’s name is mentioned, he experiences a shiver deep in his soul, considers every day spent without him a loss, and continues to echo in his soul like a whining flute. Indeed, the Messenger of God is closer to us than our own souls. How could we believe to the contrary when, a majority of the time, our egos cause us harm and suffering? We never witness anything but kindness, gentleness, compassion, tenderness, and words of wisdom from the noble Prophet. He is God’s vicegerent of mercy on earth. Thus, it is quite natural that he is closer to us than ourselves: “I am closer to believers than their own selves, so whoever of them dies while in debt and leaves nothing for its repayment, then we are to pay his debts on his behalf; and whoever dies leaving some property, then that property is for his heirs.”

There is a story behind this tradition. One day a funeral procession arrived to perform the Funeral Prayer. The noble Prophet asked, “Does he have debts?” Those present replied, “Yes, O Messenger of God, he has debts.” So the noble Prophet said, “I cannot perform the Prayer of an indebted man; you offer the Prayer of your friend.” However, this disturbed him immensely. After he attained wealth through conquests, the beloved Prophet would say regarding a deceased believer, “I am responsible for his debt.”

The noble Prophet, being closer to believers than their own selves both in this world and the Hereafter, is a great favor, and this favor will continue for eternity. He is a blessing for the hypocrites. Due to this extensive mercy, the hypocrites did not face punishment in this world; they came to the mosques, lived and roamed amongst the Muslims, and were given all the rights granted to the Muslims, but their hearts did not bear the faith of a believer. However, the Messenger of God never exposed them, although he was aware of the true identities of a majority of these individuals, which he communicated to Abu Hudhayfa. According to reports, Umar ibn al-Khattab would follow Hudhayfa and not participate in any Funeral Prayers Hudhayfa did not attend. In addition, Islam never exposed them. They constantly lived among the believers, and their definite disbelief was at least turned into doubt and hesitation. Therefore, all their worldly pleasures were not turned into bitterness. Indeed, it would be impossible for a person who awaits destruction to enjoy the pleasures of the world. When disbelief is disguised by doubt to the extent that they say, Maybe Paradise exists; perhaps life is not that miserable. Thus, in these terms the noble Prophet was, to an extent, a form of mercy for the hypocrites.

The disbelievers also reaped the benefits of his mercy. In contrast with people and nations destroyed by God en masse due to their disbelief and disobedience, after the Messenger of God was sent to the people, the Creator revoked the destruction of masses and they were therefore saved from such punishment. This was a sign that the beloved Prophet had been sent as a mercy. God addresses His Messenger regarding the subject in these words:

But God would not punish them so long as you were among them; and God is not to punish them (or other people) while they implore Him for forgiveness for their sins. (Al-Anfal 8:33).

Indeed, God revoked the destruction of masses out of consideration for His Messenger. But consider the value the noble Prophet was given in the eyes of God when He told Prophet Jesus, “If you punish them, they are your servants” (al-Maedah 5:118), while He told Prophet Muhammad, peace and blessings be upon him, “But God would not punish them so long as you were among them” (al-Anfal 8:33). In other words, for as long as you live among them, they will not suffer God’s punishment. For as long as you are remembered and commemorated on the earth, or for as long as they follow your path of righteousness, God will not cause them destruction. One of the means of disbelievers benefitting from the compassion of the noble Prophet was him saying, “I was sent to you not as a cursor but as a mercy.” In other words, he was sent as a mercy from God; he was not sent to curse and ask for the destruction of the people. Thus, the beloved Prophet always supplicated to God to show guidance and mercy, even to the greatest enemies of Islam.

Even the Archangel Gabriel benefitted from the light brought by Prophet Muhammad, peace and blessings be upon him. One day the noble Prophet asked Gabriel, “Do you have any share in the mercy contained in the Qur’an?” The Archangel Gabriel replied, “Yes, O Messenger of God.” Then he explained, “I was not certain about my fate, but when this verse was revealed, I felt secure”: “One obeyed (by his aides) and trustworthy (in fulfilling God’s orders, most particularly conveying the Revelation)” (at-Takwir 81:21).

In another of the traditions, the Messenger of God said, “I am Muhammad, I am Ahmad, I am the effacer, and infidelity shall be eliminated through me; I am the assembler. People shall be assembled on the Day of Judgment after my time. And I am the last in the sense that no prophet will succeed me.” Another tradition reads, “I am the Prophet of repentance and mercy.”

The gates of repentance are open until the Day of Judgment; indeed, the noble Prophet is the Messenger of repentance and his authority will continue until the Day of Judgment. When he saw a child crying, he would sit beside the child and weep also and sense the suffering of a weeping child’s mother deep in his soul. This is a tradition narrated by Anas ibn Malik displaying the noble Prophet’s outstanding compassion: “I stand for Prayer with the intention of prolonging it, but on hearing the cries of a child I shorten the Prayer, because I know that the cries of the child will incite its mother’s passions.” The noble Prophet would prolong his Prayers, in particular the voluntary Prayers; even the Companions found it difficult to keep up with him. He would stand with the intention of performing worship in this manner, but when he heard a child crying while leading the Prayers, he recited shorter verses of the Qur’an. As in those days, the women would also join the congregation to perform Prayer lead by the noble Prophet. On the presumption that his mother was in the mosque praying, when the Messenger of God heard a child crying he immediately cut the Prayer short, thus eliminating the mother’s anguish.

The noble Prophet was a monument of compassion in almost every aspect. The cries of a child would upset the noble Prophet and make him weep. However, despite his immense compassion he was balanced in his emotions. For example, his overpowering compassion never prevented him from administering the religious obligations, and whatever it was, whenever necessary, he never abstained from enforcing punishment.

One of Muqarrin’s sons beat his servant. The servant went to the noble Prophet in tears. The noble Prophet called the slave’s masters and said, “You hit your slave unjustly, set her free.” One of the Companions said “O Messenger of God! She is the only slave they have.” He replied, “Then she can continue to serve them, but when they no longer need her, they should free her!” Indeed, if the retribution for this beating was left until the Hereafter, the punishment would have been much graver. Accordingly, the price for this beating should be freedom so the punishment for this in the world beyond would be lighter.

What Are the Signs of Loving the Noble Prophet?

1. The deep desire to see him, listening to his words of wisdom, and considering the deprivation of these a greater disaster than being deprived of anything in this world. When Abu Bakr learned that he was to emigrate with the noble Prophet, he wept with joy. One of the Companions told the Messenger of God that even if he was to enter Paradise, he was afraid of not seeing or being close to him.

When the noble Prophet repeated his request, “Ask from me what you wish,” Rabi’ah ibn Kab wanted nothing from him but his companionship in Paradise.

2. Being prepared to sacrifice one’s life and wealth for the sake of the beloved Prophet and the truths he conveyed. During the Battle of Uhud, one of the Companions from the Ansari shielded the noble Prophet. As Talha ibn Ubaydullah stood in front of the Messenger of God to protect him, he lost one of his arms and suffered over seventy sword and spear wounds but continued to shield the noble Prophet. Abu Dujana also shielded the Messenger of God in battle. Another member of the Ansari sacrificed his own life for the sake of the beloved Prophet, and died with his cheek on the noble Prophet’s foot.

3. Complying with the commands of God’s Messenger and avoiding the things he abstained from. When eating the meat of domesticated donkeys was prohibited by the noble Prophet, the respected Companions immediately discarded the donkey meat that was cooking in the pot. In the same way, they poured away alcohol found in their homes immediately after drinking alcohol was forbidden.

4. Complying with the traditions of the Messenger of God comprised of his words, actions and statements, guarding and supporting the truths he conveyed throughout his life. When the news spread of the death of the noble Prophet in a trench dug on the Muslim front, Anas ibn Nadr sacrificed his life saying, “What is the value of life without the beloved Prophet?”

In addition to the aspects mentioned above, we can also include the following points as signs of love for the noble Prophet:

- Enjoining good and forbidding evil (tabligh)

- Aspiring to live during the period in which he lived and sacrificing everything for his sake

- Complying with the traditions and actions of the beloved Prophet, and adopting our own lifestyles in accordance with his life

- Acknowledging the words of the Messenger of God and complying with his commands.

- Constantly invoking blessing and greetings upon the noble Prophet

A Person Is with Those He Loves

A man came to the beloved Prophet and asked, “O Messenger of God! When will the Day of Judgment come?”

The noble Prophet responded, “What have you prepared for that day?”

When the man replied, “Nothing except the love I have for God and His Messenger,” the noble Prophet said, “You will be with those you love.”

The Companions never rejoiced at anything as much as when they heard these words of the Messenger of God, Anas, who was present at the time, said: “I love the Messenger of God, Abu Bakr, and Umar, so I hope to be with them in the Hereafter due to my love for them.”

Questions

1) Who were the people who “came to the mosques, lived and roamed amongst the Muslims, and were given all the rights granted to the Muslims, but their hearts did not bear the faith of a believer”?

A) Believers C) Hypocrites

B) Disbelievers D) Polytheists

2) What is the name of the duty of the noble Prophet, in fact of all believers, meaning “Enjoining good and forbidding evil”?

A) Tayammum C) Tarawih

B) Wajib D) Tabligh

3) Which of the following is not an important sign of loving the noble Prophet?

A) The aspiration of seeing him and being in his company

B) Being prepared to be altruistic for the sake of the truths he conveyed

C) Making a career choice

D) Complying with the traditions of the Messenger of God comprised by his words, actions and statements; guarding and supporting the truths he conveyed throughout his life

4) Anas, a servant of the noble Prophet, said, “By God, I served him for nine years, and not once did he say to me, ‘Why did you do that?’ or ‘Why did you not do that?’ about something which I had not done.” Which characteristic was being emphasized?

A) His courage

B) His gentle nature

C) His generosity

D) His trustworthiness

5) After the Messenger of God was sent to the people, the Creator revoked the destruction of people and nations en mass, and therefore disbelieving and disobedient people were saved from such punishment. This was a sign that the noble Prophet had been sent as a ______? Which of the following should fill the blank?

A) Mercy

B) Prosperity

C) Repentance

D) Teacher