Enter the Terrordome, pg.6 • YouTube’s Diva Supreme, pg.19 • ‘50s Fur and Cowboy Boots, pg. 26
FOURTEENTHSTREET fourteenthstreetmag.com
Hung Over?
Last night’s wild party deserves today’s amazing brunch (pg. 15)
March 2010
STREETGUIDE Editors’ Letter
pg. 3
Short Cuts: Take a detour with these quick, fun reads.
MUSIC&ENTERTAINMENT
pg. 5
Ad
pg. 6
Living in Terror: There’s no place quite like a house venue.
pg. 8
From Shad Fishing to Rock ’n’ Roll: Fishtown is the city’s new live music hub.
SEX&LOVE
pg. 9
pg. 10
Put a Ring On It: Are you a “mate poacher”? Find out here!
pg. 11
This Modern Love: Romance in the era of texts and tweets.
FOOD&DRINK
pg. 13
pg. 14
pg. 19
pg. 15
Br
pg. 19
JB Check out this hot tranny success.
pg. 23
pg. 26
Awakening the Green Fairy: Go ahead and get a little absinthe-minded. A Hard Day’s Brunch: Mimosas and eggs headed your way. It’s Johnny Boy, Bitches:
HEALTH&LIVING
pg. 24
The Green Diaries: A carnivorous smoker starts hugging trees.
pg. 26
Unearthed Vintage: Discover vintage beyond Retrospect.
pg. 28
Spanish Lessons: Love equals confusing, even en Español.
ShortCuts FOURTEENTHSTREET Dear Readers,
A week before this publication was sent to be printed, Philadelphia bloomed. For anyone who spent this exceptionally snowy winter hibernating indoors, the past few warm-weathered days have served as a reminder of why we live – not just reside, but live – in this city. Deserted no longer, Beury Beach is polka-dotted with breezy dresses, Ray-Ban sunglasses and melting Mister Softee cones. Rittenhouse Square is lined with picnic blankets. Up and down Broad Street, people are walking, biking, sitting out on stoops and blasting music from their cars. We’ve been anticipating this for awhile. With this first issue of Fourteenth Street, we’ve tried to capture the infectious energy found throughout the city by presenting you with some of Philadelphia’s movers and shakers – like Johnny Boy, a transgendered teen pop star who’s stirring up a storm on YouTube. We’ve also got the goods on some of the city’s hottest trends – like impromptu, wordof-mouth house shows and big, hearty, hangover-curing brunches. These bright spots are the synapses in the city’s chemical composition. So take off your sweater, nestle your toes between blades of grass and let the excitement born from the ascending temperature bring you back to the first moment you stepped on Temple’s campus or saw City Hall. We’ll be right there with you.
Emily Freisher
Anna Hyclak
editors-in-chief EMILY FREISHER ANNA HYCLAK publisher MELANIE MENKEVICH music & entertainment editor CARLENE MAJORINO sex & love editor CHRISTEEN VILBRUN food & drink editor LAUREN HERMAN health & living editor DANIELLE ZIMMERMAN creative director KRISTON BETHEL designers LAUREN CORREIA CHELSEA LEPOSA photo editors SANDE FRIEDMAN KIM WOOD online editor STACY LIPSON senior writer THOMAS MATES contributing writers COLIN KERRIGAN NICOLE SAYLOR contributing photographers ELLIOT ENSOR CODY GRISWOLD COLIN KERRIGAN MARIA POUCHNIKOVA SARAH SCHU ALEX UDOWENKO CHRIS ZAKORCHEMNY models JENNIFER GRATZ BEN HYCLAK SAMANTHA RISE ROBERSON special thanks TIGER WOODS Fourteenth Street is sponsored by the Temple University Journalism Department. The student-run publication appears as an insert in the Temple News twice every spring semester. For questions or comments, please contact Professor Laurence Stains at lstains@temple.edu.
FOURTEENTHSTREETMAG.COM twitter @14thstreetmag contact 14thstreetmag@gmail.com photo by CHRIS ZAKORCHEMN
14 Questions with...
kill 14 minutes before class
You probably know her better as the “Hipster Grifter” – the tiny girl with the pixie haircut who stole thousands of dollars from unwitting hipsters all across Brooklyn, faked having cancer, faked pregnancies, faked book deals and conned her way into a job at Vice magazine, all before her 23rd birthday. An article published in the New York Observer last spring aired her dirty laundry for all the world to see and sent her on the lam – only to be caught in Philadelphia by Hermit Thrushes drummer Sam Tremble and thrown into prison. Now, almost a year later, she’s free again – and something of a hipster legend. In between guest blogging for Gawker and weighing porn offers, the girl who used her wit and charm to scam hundreds of American Apparel devotees found the time to answer a few of our questions. 1. What was the worst thing you ever bought with someone else’s money? Fried chicken. Just kidding, a fake abortion. 2. What was your last indulgence? Sex in a hospital bathroom. Hearing the swoosh of the paper nightgown really gets my (at the moment, non-existent) britches wet. 3. If you were sentenced to the electric chair, what would you choose as your last meal? A large veggie burrito from Beto’s Mexican Restaurant, a side of mash with gravy and seventeen pounds of creme brulee. 4. If you were President for a day, what would you change about the country’s justice system? I would let crack-cocaine come through the doors, but no lighters. I would then film the ensuing chaos and hawk it to word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word word
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MEMOIRS
Kari Ferrell
Vh1, because you know that's far more interesting than any of their other programming. 5. How many tattoos do you have and what are they? I have three: autistic flaming bird on my chest, life string on phallic-like thimble and scissors on my wrist, “I Heart Beards” on my lower right back/upper right ass. 6. You’re known for your pick-up lines. What's the worst line you've ever gotten? “Hey, baby, come here often?” in jail. 7. Besides getting arrested, what was the craziest thing that ever happened to you in Philly? Running into a burning barrel in the middle of the road while being chased by singing transients on South Street. I wish I was kidding. 8. Who would you want to play you
by ELLIOT ENSOR
in the movie of your life? Danny DeVito. The resemblance is uncanny, don't you think? 9. Do you have any secret talents? I can talk like Goofy and shoot projectiles out of my geejay (girl jewels). 10. What’s your favorite song right now? “Pony” by Ginuwine. 13. Given that they’re dropping like flies... in your opinion, which celebrity will be the next to die? One can only hope that it’s Angela Goethals. Remember what a bitch she was to Kevin in Home Alone? (“You're what the French call les incompetents.”) 14. Without naming names, tell us about your most recent kiss. Well, instead of a tongue, it was a penis, so that’s good.
by ANNA HYCLAK
I got everything I wanted, then realized that I wanted all the wrong things.--Kami Mattioli | Being at an Urban Super Liberal University made me irritated with bleeding heart lefties.--Bill Yaeger | Living the life I want would be much easier if I were Bradley Cooper.--Nick DeLorenzo | Pretty girls are lucky, but girls who feel pretty are luckier. Be pretty inside.--Phoebe Stolzenberger | “You'll always be a child of two worlds” doesn't even begin to explain it.--James Morgan | The way you treat yourself sets the standard for others. --Sonya Friedman. That's all.--Emily Royce | Instead of saying “Yes,” say “Fuck it.” Instead of saying “Fuck it,” say “Yes.”--Katherine Albin | It’s hard to enjoy life now when you’re constantly thinking of your future ambitions.--Kirsten Stamn | I walk confidently; strangers ask for directions. I don't know where I'm going, either.--Kayla Hilliard | I dream of owning a bookshelf large enough to hold all my books. --Katie Ionata | Around the world and back, I realized what I want doesn’t depend on geography.--Tal Stuhl | Traveling is my only real passion in life, which not many people truly understand.--Sarah Hutton | I traveled. I helped people. I fought forest fires. I am now a valet.-Greg Trainor | It’s 4:39 at night and deadline is approaching with dawn. Hit the snooze button.--Jimmy Viola
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&
MUSIC ENTERTAINMENT
From Salinger to “sextrology,” we’ve got your spring reading list covered.
14 Books You Should Buy Right Now! – tells the story of his life as an obsessed Eagles fan (and touches on issues of love, loss and family along the way).
Nine Stories by J.D. Salinger
You all know Holden Caulfield – now it’s time to get acquainted with some of Salinger’s other notable characters, like Seymour Glass, a young war veteran who reaches a breaking point of insanity during a seemingly idyllic summer vacation.
The Complete Persepolis by Marjane Satrapi
This comic strip memoir – which tells the story of Satrapi’s coming of age in Tehran during the Islamic Revolution – is the city’s “One Book, One Philadelphia” choice for 2010.
I Don’t Care About Your Band by Julie Klausner
The subtitle says it all: “What I Learned from Indie Rockers, Trust Funders, Pornographers, Felons, Faux-Sensitive Hipsters, and Other Guys I’ve Dated.” Recently heartbroken? Keep this book by your side (along with a big ol’ bottle of vodka), and you’ll be laughing in no time.
Sextrology: The Astrology of Sex and the Sexes by Starsky and Cox
Has your newspaper horoscope ever told you which sex positions are best suited for your sign? I didn’t think so.
Invisible Monsters by Chuck Palahniuk
A model is shot in the face, leaving her disfigured and setting her on a path of motion that leads to pharmaceutical heists, revenge arson and a life-changing friendship with a pill-popping, dream-chasing transsexual named Brandy Alexander.
Bury Me in my Jersey: A Memoir of My Father, Football, and Philly by Tom McAllister
McAllister – who teaches creative writing at Temple
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Grunge by Thurston Moore and Michael Lavine
Sonic Youth’s Thurston Moore and rock photographer Michael Lavine offer a photographic history of the greasy-haired bands and flannel-sporting fans that emerged in the late ’80s/ early ’90s grunge scene. Perfect for anyone who grew up listening to Nirvana and Pearl Jam.
Jesus’ Son by Denis Johnson
This collection of short stories – named after a line in the Velvet Underground song “Heroin” – is so fastpaced it’s almost dizzying and packed with plenty of harrowing tales of car wrecks, overdoses, abortions and addiction. Think the ’60s and ’70s were all peace, love and Beatles songs? Think again.
Bright Shiny Morning by James Frey
Frey sticks to what he knows best: fiction. Great, spellbinding fiction that explores all that is real, fake, good, evil, beautiful and ugly about Los Angeles.
Eating Animals by Jonathan Safran Foer
Part memoir, part philosophical investigation, this book makes a well-researched, compassionate
plea for vegetarianism.
Smartphones just keep getting smarter. But what apps are necessary for your urban survival? We break down the fun, the useful and the can’t-believe-you-ever-lived-without. by CARLENE MAJORINO
Entertainment
The Savoy Cocktail Book by Harry Craddock
The ultimate guide to class and cocktails, written by the bartender who popularized the dry martini. Originally published in London in the ’30s (when Americans were fleeing across the Atlantic to avoid Prohibition), this book contains more than 750 recipes perfect for a dorm room speakeasy.
White Noise If you’re the type of person who can only fall asleep to a grandfather clock or a soothing oscillating fan, this app is for you. It simulates those conditions to help sleep come a little easier. Other simulated sounds include a thunderstorm, extreme rain pouring and that airplane you undoubtedly frequent on your weekends off.
My Wonderful World of Fashion by Nina Chakrabarti
Fashionistas, take note: this isn’t your little sister’s coloring book. You can learn how to make a sari and turn a scrap of lace into a Lady Gaga-esque mask while coloring in whimsical drawings of cowboy boots, henna tattoos, graffiti tees and paisley stockings. No need to stay inside the lines.
Shazam
The Rules of Attraction by Bret Easton Ellis
How many times have you been in a bar and fallen in love with that song the entire room began to dance to at 1:30 a.m., never to be heard again? Handy especially for the memory-impaired, this app instantly informs you of the song and lets you relive that drunken stupor one more time.
An ode to college life: the raucous parties, the drugs, the sex, the ennui, the pseudo-intellectual banter. Make it a point to read this before you leave Temple and enter “the real world.”
Bicycle Diaries by David Byrne
The former Talking Heads frontman shares his thoughts on urban planning around the world, from Sydney to New York City, making observations and suggesting solutions as he rides around on his trusty fold-up bicycle, taking everything in. by ANNA HYCLAK
Utility
Fandango
Shots From the Street by JESSIE FOX FOURTEENTHSTREETMAG.COM
Short on time but desperate for a little visual entertainment? Download this app to scour through new movie releases and reserve tickets at your local theater. Fan ratings and movie trailers let you size up unknown flicks, and plugging in your location brings up a shortlist of theaters in your area. Blackberry Alternative: Moviefone
Cheap Gas Just what it sounds like, Cheap Gas offers a database of stations close to your location and sorts prices from lowest to highest. Prices are up-to-date, but beware, Philly residents: this app is not afraid to send you across the bridge for the sake of 10 cents.
Around Me A phone with internal GPS is one of those things people don’t know is necessary for survival until they own it, just like the Kindle and transition lenses. Around Me scopes out your location and then you name it, it finds it: bars, coffee shops, hospitals and supermarkets are all listed for your convenience.
Mixology Perfect for the adventurous and the inexperienced alike, Mixology is the type of technology that may put human beings (i.e., bartenders) out of work someday. With the ability to browse drinks, search a random selection, or choose the liquor, you’ll spend less time ordering and more time on the dance floor. Blackberry Alternative: Easy Bartender
Productivity Dragon Dictation Texting while driving isn’t just life-threatening — it’s illegal! Thanks to this app, it’s still possible to shoot your friends a quick note while keeping your eyes on the road. After dictating a message, you can choose to e-mail it, send it as a text or just keep it for yourself as a personal reminder.
Whole Foods Who doesn’t wish they could be told, at 9 p.m. on a Tuesday night, which preservative-filled canned goods in their kitchen could make a feasible meal? The “on-hand” tab asks for three ingredients and finds a dish that incorporates them. Fear not to be adventurous.
Personal Assistant If you live on your own, this app serves as the mom you wish still organized everything in your life. With the ability to track all credit card spending, bills and bank accounts, there’s no way forgetfulness will be an excuse for your debt anymore. Unfortunately, you’re probably just broke. Blackberry Alternative: Evernote
MUSIC&ENTERTAINMENT
LIVING IN home is where the hardcore is. by THOMAS MATES and CARLENE MAJORINO photos by CODY GRISWOLD
“H
OW MANY of you started listening to punk rock because you were pissed off?” The female singer/guitarist and occasional drummer of the Philly band Layers/Quake shouted passionately to the audience. “Because I did.” The dark-haired girl, who sat behind her bandmate’s drum set at this early February show, told a story of the drug-ridden gay community she grew up in and the way she avoided it: by playing and listening to punk music. She told this story to a living room with over 50 people, in a West Philly house dubbed the Terrordome. The residency’s façade, near 48th Street and Haverford Avenue, looks like any other West Philly home, but
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the inside gives the impression that Fight Club’s Tyler Durden may have once lived there. “Welcome to the Terrordome,” so the song goes. The Terrordome is a house venue that primarily hosts hardcore punk shows, and has gained some measure of infamy in Philadelphia by hosting, on average, about ten shows a month. The Terrordome is also home to five people. “It sucks,” said Dennis Casey, one of the five residents. “It’s like living at a venue. I come down in the morning and there are broken beer bottles all over and bodies everywhere because bands sleep here all the time. It looks like we have non-stop parties.” The “stage” is an elevated portion of the living room about two feet off the ground — an architectual feature that
home-sweet-homes. Breakfast and Dessert, another West Philly house venue, handles things a little differently. For starters, all of their shows are held in the basement, which has the capacity to hold 150 people with less difficulty than the Terrordome. “It makes a big difference [doing basement shows],” Casey said. Nick Fanelli lives at Breakfast and Dessert, playing promoter for the space as well as booking all-ages shows at the Fire, another concert house on Girard Avenue. After a brief period of adjustment, Fanelli stopped caring about the problems that arise living in a house venue. “It can be a little weird sometimes,” Fanelli said. “I mean, it’s what I’ve wanted for a long time. It’s why I moved in. You just take the bad with the good and enjoy having it – and at the end of the night, I don’t have to walk home.”
BUT NOT all house venues fall victim to this physical devastation of their
BY NOW, Casey’s used to finding chain-bearing, pasty teenagers wandering Haverford Avenue at 9pm on a Tuesday searching the dark cityscape for his Victorian-style house. Anyone who arrives at the intersection, which is the only hint of locale printed on most show flyers, will likely find kids lost, confused and attempting to follow the sound of music to their destination. “It’s the entire reason we live this far out in West Philly,” Casey said. “We looked for houses that we could do shows in.” The Terrordome’s owner lives in England, and the building was abandoned until Casey and his roommates moved in. Dirty and unfinished, the back door of the house had a four-inch gap between it and the frame, letting in the bitter cold and the occasional wildlife. “Things were supposed to be finished in the first month, but none of
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came with the house — and serves its purpose justly. Some bands prefer to set up right in the middle of the room for a more intimate concert, but either way, because of the nature of the performances, the house gets “destroyed all the time,” as Casey put it. “Destroyed” may be a conservative word choice. The stone tiles of the floor are shattered; there are holes in the walls and a hole in the floor with a cautionary sign that reads, “Don’t step here.” When his attention was brought to the sign, all Casey could say in a flat, deadpan voice was, “People don’t listen.” The word “obliterated” may be more appropriate.
those things were finished,” Casey said. If Casey’s landlord had any idea what the house she pays mortgage on was used for – let alone named – the party would be over. But she’s a world away, and won’t be clued in until the
lease is up later this year. “That gives us the ability to neglect the house so much,” he said. “We’re definitely not getting our security deposit back. That’s for sure.” WITH SO many house venues in the city, battling with countless professional music promoters — like R5, Village
Green Productions and Ticketmaster – could incite rivalry among the houses. But unlike Ticketmaster, house venues are a network of friends with a common, selfless passion for music. Casey and Fanelli don’t need to compete. “We [only] joke around about it sometimes,” Casey said. “If it’s late in the night and we’re kind of drunk, we’ll start fights about it.” Fanelli and Casey both know that their houses are differ drastically, from the holes in the walls to the beer stains on the floors, and they appreciate that every band that comes to Philly can be accommodated in at least one of the houses. “I don’t think anyone necessarily does it any better,” Fanelli said. “There are certain shows that we’ll do here that wouldn’t be great anywhere else, but they’re great here because this is the right place for it.” The Terrordome and Breakfast and Dessert aren’t in the business for personal compensation. It wouldn’t amount to much anyway. Yet for the bands that come from thousands of miles away with a shitty van, no place to stay, and out 20 bucks from their last gas-and-cigarette pit stop, every dollar is a mile closer to home. “We give everything to the touring bands so they can eat well and drive,” Casey said. The shows at both houses are open to all ages and are B.Y.O.B. Shows can get reckless at times – and dangerous. The fear of cops already looms with every chord struck and underage sip taken, but there is only so much a few “house rules” can do. Casey recalls an abnormal night that epitomized this fear. “People had fake blood and stuff, so there was a huge mess,” he said. “People were crowd surfing, and crowd surfing on top of crowd surfing.” Although the night was particularly crazy, a couple of bloody noses are not an uncommon appearance at the >>>
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MUSIC&ENTERTAINMENT Terrordome, or indeed any house venue. It’s all in good fun, but in a house, house rules go: respect the belongings of others; don’t touch the bands’ equipment, even when it’s right in front of you; and always, always look out for those around you – especially when they start to get riled up. LUCKILY FOR the Terrordome and Breakfast and Dessert, their respective neighborhoods have embraced their brand of fun. “Most of [our neighbors] are happy to see it,” Fanelli said. “They’re supportive. We’re not trying to live by their
rules, but we are trying to be neighborly.” The Terrordome is similarly well-regarded. The infamous hardcore venue has become a staple of the community it resides in. “Our neighborhood loves us,” Casey said. “[Our neighbors] used to come by and hang out. One guy used to bring a cooler and sell alcohol and soda.” After his lease is up, Casey is going to call it quits for the Terrordome. But that doesn’t mean he’s done promoting house shows. “I just don’t want to live this far away anymore,” Casey said.
He thinks he’ll end up pooling resources with the residents of Breakfast and Dessert and Ava House, a house venue in South Philly, to create one large venue. “We’ve talked about it,” Casey said, “and we’re probably all going to live together next year.” Opening up one’s home to be demolished by musicians and their rabid fans can’t be an easy decision to make. But Casey wouldn’t have it any other way. Though his time at the Terrordome is coming to an end, he still looks back on the nights of music and drunken antics fondly. •
SEX&LOVE Fourteenth Street Singles These eligible bachelors and bachelorettes are just waiting for a Missed Connection. by MELANIE MENKEVICH and NICOLE SAYLOR
if house shows aren’t your thing... story and photos by COLIN KERRIGAN Though you might not realize it, Fishtown is close. Really close. The historic neighborhood, which was once the center of the city’s shad fishing industry, is now the hub of Philadelphia’s live music scene – and it’s just a five-minute drive, seven-minute bike ride or twenty-minute walk from campus. Next time you’re looking for a cheap beer and some guitar riffs, head to one of these three bars – without them, the city just wouldn’t be the same.
Jean Cadeau, 23, straight
Sell yourself in five words: My native language is French.
Max Nathans, 21, straight Turn on: Someone happy. No negativity. Turn off: A bad drunk.
Quinta Brunson, 20, straight
Sell yourself in five words: I’m 4’11” of mass destruction.
The Barbary 951 Frankford Ave.
Kung Fu Necktie 1248 N. Front St.
Tucked away under Market-Frankford blue line, the small, intimate Kung Fu Necktie has a dark, gloomy, almost medieval atmosphere. The walls are lined with strange religious items and there’s a TV constantly playing weird sci-fi films. But don’t worry – you’re gonna have a good time here. Whether you’re hanging out by the pool table, dropping quarters in the jukebox or checking out one of their frequent concerts (local bands like Blood Feathers and Drink Up Buttercup play alongside national acts), KFN is the perfect place to spend a Saturday night.
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The Barbary is well known for a couple of reasons: 1. It hosts some of the most intense dances parties in the city, 2. It has three floors (yes, three floors) – each with their own bar, and 3. It’s the only bar in the city that offers all-ages concerts (hear that, freshmen?). Kids from all over the city and suburbs flock to The Barbary for these shows, which give young music lovers the opportunity to see some of their favorite bands perform live. But those of you over 21 can enjoy the Barbary, too – after the shows, the bouncers kick the young’ns out and the real party begins.
Johnny Brenda’s 1201 Frankford Ave.
Out of the three Fishtown bars, Johnny Brenda’s offers the best experience by far. Unlike The Barbary and Kung Fu Necktie, Johnny Brenda’s has a full menu of locally grown food and locally brewed beer. The menu, written on a big black chalkboard that hangs toward the back of the seating area, frequently changes, sometimes even in the middle of the day – which says something about the venue’s dedication to fresh food. Don’t expect to see any imported beers here – all lagers and ales sold come from breweries located within a 90-mile radius of the venue. But when it comes to music, Johnny Brenda’s hosts bands from all across the U.S. and beyond – recent guests have included Sufjan Stevens, Portugal. the Man, White Rabbits and several other popular indie acts.
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Sean Svadlenak, 21, straight
Turn on: Girls with bigger feet than mine.
Mia Cammisa, 20, straight
Turn on: Mohawks. They’re hot. Turn off: John Mayer.
Gabby Ryan, 19, lesbian Sell yourself in five words: Too sweet to be sour.
Zack Knauss, 21, bisexual Turn on: Hair in up-dos. Turn off: Nose rings.
Felix Albert, 20, gay Turn on: Guys with glasses. Turn off: Girly guys.
Melody Lam, 20, straight
Sell yourself in five words: Yeah, I’m kind of awesome.
SEX&LOVE
Put a Ring n It!
Just so we know you’re already taken...
“I
by EMILY FREISHER
think it’s something about the way you smell,” he said. I turned away and diverted my eyes to the window, the blank television screen—anything in the room that shifted my attention away from the boy slumped lazily next to me on the couch. “I smell of bad decisions and immorality,” I half-jokingly muttered back, before quickly jumping up to make a cup of tea. He had a girlfriend, and a fairly serious one at that. At this particular moment in time they were back from a summer-long hiatus in California and about to move in together and I, unattached and without a particularly strong moral compass, had chosen to complicate things. Everything backfired, of course. I’m still single, he’s still dating her and we’re both still barely talking. I took the fall, blamed it on my apprehension for relationships — I’ve never been in one — and moved forward. I Facebook-friended the adorable boy with glasses and fluent Spanish in class and proceeded to drop somewhat obvious, and often reciprocated, hints at attraction. Soon after, his status lit up my news feed: in a relationship. I was speechless. One had been a mistake, but was two a trend? Could I continue my pursuit in feigned ignorance, or did this finding necessitate a swift and divisive cutoff? And what was he doing, anyway? Sociologists have been
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text me and I could see her ter relationships building off consuming and the exact across the room and know of that third person. reason so many people dehe wasn’t texting her. That Then there are those who fer emotional relationships made me feel powerful.” value the detachment and in pursuit of physical ones There’s also, of course, indefinable nature of this in- without serious implications. the lust factor. The whole volvement. Whatever the reason, hidden romance deal. RoThis is my own personal both men and women manmanticism may have age to successfully Mate poaching typically involves fuck up healthy relaenlightened the latter half of the 18th cen- an intricate web of social deception, tionships by engaging tury, but gushy poetry interpersonal conflict, and intense in mate poaching. and tales of illicit love Psychologist David emotionality. still pervade the modSchmitt said it best. ern girl’s fantasy. conviction, defining my- “Mate poaching typically A 2003 study by the self as an independent and involves an intricate web of Center for Marital Health avoiding emotional depen- social deception, interperconcluded, “Committed re- dence at all costs. The first sonal conflict and intense lationships carry with them time I cried over a guy I was emotionality.” an expectation of sexual crying more for the loss of Egos are boosted, chalmonogamy... thoughts of my independence than any- lenges won — but what sex with another person, thing he had actually done. are the ultimate gains from flirtations with another and Nothing prompted my tears mate-poaching? A few nongenital physical intima- more than the fact that they shameless nights of crycies often provoke guilt and were falling at all and I was ing and bitterness towards secrecy.” pissed off at myself for let- couples in long-term relaThis “unrequited lust” ting someone else dictate tionships? gains impetus from the dis- how I felt. Emotional availMaybe we’re better off parities in mutual attraction ability is emotional vulner- single. • and ultimately serves to fos- ability, and it’s scary and
“
”
photo courtesy of SARAH SCHU
piecing together the laws of ly – that disrupts thousands trait, and we want it – bad. attraction for decades, con- of couples within the elusive It’s a universally attractive ducting studies that confirm context of physical attrac- trait, one that incites comthese bizarre mating habits. tion. But why bother? petition among sexes. ConThe technical term is mate We love confidence. Our fidence isn’t just attractive to poaching, a phenomenon own insecurity after yield- you, it’s attractive to everyidentifying people who find ing to the aesthetic ideals one at the party, and if you the struggle, confidence, of others all day long leaves can nab that person, your inner turmoil and generally no room for extraneous self- sexual status is immediately elevated elevated. People emotional Emotional availability is emotional vulnerability, want to be populevel of among their it’s scary and consuming and the exact reason lar attraction peers and part of to taken many people defer emotional relationships in that perception p a r t n e r s pursuit of physical ones. lies in this attenso addiction. tive. doubt. There’s something “I always felt like I was A 2005 study at Florida intriguing about someone winning this weird battle,” Atlantic University proposed who doesn’t hesitate when said a friend who recently that 49% of people have at- they smile, speak or envel- ended a complicated twotempted mate poaching. A op you in a hug. They must year relationship as the othheartbreaking figure – literal- possess some desirable er girl. “At a party, he would
FOURTEENTHSTREETMAG.COM
This Modern Love
In the era of Facebook, Twitter, texting and über-confessional blogs, what’s a single gal or guy to do? SANDE FRIEDMAN serves as your relationship Geek Squad.
A
certain type of mythical male still exists: the one who doesn’t Facebook. The one who doesn’t know what “smartphone” actually means. The one who considers Twitter the lazy person’s way of
reading the news. The one who couldn’t give two hoots about checking his email. Well, voila! He exists and I dated him for two years. Want to give your technology addiction a swift kick in the butt? Find your own version of this mythical male
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and do the same. But if you can’t find said Facebook-less partner, I’ve got some rules for you – rules that will help you navigate the world of tech dating while still retaining your dignity.
Rule 1:
Phones go away during dates. No arguments. Intelligent reader, hopefully you’ve adopted this courtesy already, but it still stands to be mentioned. It’s always rude to break out your cell phone around company, but especially so on a date. Consider it both an insult and a sign of disrespect, a visual reminder that someone else is more important than your current company. Many of us are obsessed with answering messages as quickly as they come in and keeping up-to-date with every moment of everyone
FAMOUSLY POACHED MATES
PRINCE CHARLES:
No one is quite sure why Camilla ParkerBowles found this Royal so charming, but her persistance triumphed when the couple married in 2005 after his previous wife, Princess Diana, was killed in a car accident in 1997.
BRAD PITT:
When Angelina famously leaked that she had begun her affair with Brad on the set of their film Mr. & Mrs. Smith, all hell broke loose. Breaking up Hollywood’s power couple doesn’t come without a price, and since then, supporters and haters have donned “Team Aniston” and “Team Jolie” shirts.
LIZ TAYLOR AND EDDIE FISHER: Fisher divorced Debbie Reynolds to become Elizabeth Taylor’s fourth husband in 1959 – a huge scandal at the time. But the marriage was short-lived, and by the early 1960s, Taylor was poached by Richard Burton during the filming of Cleopatra. The couple married nine days after her divorce from Fisher in 1964.
else’s lives. But are the people you text and Twitter-stalk and Facebook really that important? Turn off, silence or store away the devices! Even if you’re not doing anything wrong, it will still come across as shady if you’re texting rather than appreciating every moment with the person sitting next to you. A former roommate of mine had a huge crush on one of her classmates for a long time, but the guy never seemed to reciprocate her feelings. Night after night, they sat on our couch together, doing homework – but he never made a move. She assumed he wasn’t interested, so she kept a few other guys on hold, and spent much of their study time texting them. Why not? The one she wanted was ignoring her every advance. Then, fed up, she drunkenly texted him one night
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Unless you plan on being the next Carrie Bradshaw, put nothing about your per-
to
o ph m Ki by d oo W
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that LiveJournal created for me. These days, it’s harder to write about your feelings on blogs or social networking sites without accidentally baring your soul to your friends, significant other, family members, even professors. A single tweet in my case – “why do I always miss my ex-boyfriend when I fight with my current one?” – became a point of reference during many a heated argument in my last relationship. During one particularly massive fight, he actually whipped out a handwritten list of my “Best Insulting Tweets,” something he’d been holding onto in preparation for our next battle. Psychotic? Absolutely. But these were, in fact, all tweets I’d written. People will see the things you write on the Internet – and, in some cases, hold your words against you for a long, long time. If you need to write things out, I’d suggest investing in a journal instead. One with a lock.
Rule 3:
The profiles and pages of your friends are a reflection upon you just as much as your own. A joke or statement posted to your Facebook wall by a girlfriend says something about you, not just her. If it’s inappropriate, delete it or hide the comments. It may not be offensive to you or them, but absolutely can be to someone else. This applies in the other direction as well – comments you leave other people will be seen by their/your significant other and buds, because let’s face it, we all stalk and check out everyone’s profiles. Recent Montclair State graduate Rachel Hansen learned this the hard way. Her Facebook page was full of four years’
worth of drunk photographs posted by her friends – which she considered silly memories. That is, until she started dating a Penn grad shortly after college. When the two made the everterrifying step of becoming Facebook friends, he made an awkward joke about her obsessive love for boxed wine and homemade margaritas and Vladimir mixed with just about anything. And then he disappeared. Coincidence? Not a shot. Rachel heard through the grapevine that an ex of this boy’s had cheated on him during a drunk night out with friends. He never got over it. Rachel still thinks about it today. “I’m still embarrassed,” she said. “I never thought stupid photos could be a deal breaker, but apparently they’re enough to incriminate you early on. He was so cute, too.”
D
oes all this mean we need to jump ship and abandon our Facebook pages and Twitters and blogs if we have any hopes of finding or keeping a respectable significant other? Of course not. But just as the future of everything in business and media is becoming more Internetcentric, our own social lives are headed in the same direction. Personal business is personal for a reason – keep your Google name searches clean and make sure your statuses and Facebook photos don’t give anyone the wrong idea about the fabulous person you are. •
Fun Fact:
77.8%
of students polled use the “poke” application to flirt with others
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FOOD&DRINK
Even at our hungriest, there are times when cafeteria food just won’t do. We asked three of Philly’s hottest chefs to cook up some quick, tasty, dorm-friendly recipes. by LAUREN HERMAN
Mitch Prensky
“
Michael Solomonov
Head Chef and C0-Owner, Supper
This is one of those great ideas to have up your sleeve for when you want something good, fast and cheap.
“
Rule 2:
sonal life on the Internet. Ever. Ever. Ever. Did I say ever? As those of us in our early- to mid-twenties will fondly remember, LiveJournal and Xanga were the coolest things ever in high school. Even if you’ve long since deleted the error-riddled online journals of your youth, you know that the phenomenon of the personal blog never truly died. Unfortunately, there’s this funny thing about writing about your life on the Internet: even people who don’t keep blogs are fond of snooping around on others’. Anything you write about your personal life can and will come back to haunt you. My high school years and first long-term relationship were chronicled in a LiveJournal with Radiohead lyrics for the title. It’s a blast to read when I’m feeling nostalgic. But I try to avoid slipping back into the shareeverything mentality
South Philly Flatbread
Difficulty: I
1 ball pizza dough 1 pkg. sliced provolone 1 small jar eggplant caponata
1 small jar hot pick- led pepper rings Dried basil, oregano, parmagiano cheese, salt and pepper
The Flatbread 1. Preheat oven to 450 degrees. 2. Divide pizza dough into four balls. Flatten by rolling with a rolling pin. 3. Place on an oiled pan and bake in oven until just baked through (about 5-7 minutes). Remove and let cool. This can be done ahead of time, cut into individual portions and wrapped up and put in the freezer. 4. Spread flatbreads with some eggplant appetizer and pickled peppers, then top with slices of cheese. Sprinkle with herbs and parmagiano and place in oven until the cheese is bubbly and browning (about 7-9 minutes).
“
Head Chef and Owner, Zahav
It’s great for students because it’s both cheap and dangerous to make. It’s fried food at its best.
Fried Califlower
“
and asked, “Why haven’t you ever tried anything with me?” His message back put her in her place: “Maybe if you didn’t text so many other guys when I’m sitting right next to you, I’d actually believe your flirting a bit more.” When people ask her about what happened with him, she simply shoves her phone into her bag and groans.
Difficulty: I I
1 Head cauliflower ½ cup Greek yogurt Vegetable oil (to fry) 1 tbsp of each salt and pepper (chopped): dill, 2 cloves of garlic parsley,chives 2 tbsp lemon juice 1 tsp chopped mint The Dip 1. Puree the garlic with the lemon juice and let stand for 15 minutes. 2. Add the yogurt and herbs. Pulse to mix. 3. Season to taste with salt and pepper. 4. Cover up and refrigerate for up to 24 hours. The Cauliflower 1. Heat the vegetable oil in a heavy-bottomed pot to 350 degrees. 2. Remove the cauliflower florets from the core and separate the florets so that they are approximately one inch in diameter. 3. Fry the florets for approximately four minutes until deep golden brown. 4. Remove the florets with a slotted spoon and drain on paper towels to remove excess oil. 5. Season immediately with salt. Serve with the prepared dip.
Gene Guiffi
“
Head Chef and Owner, Cochon
This is perfect for college students. It uses an affordable cut of meat, and will feed 10-12 hungry people.
Pork Butt Chili
“
SEX&LOVE
Difficulty: I I I
For Puree: 12 pasilla chiles 1 head of garlic 1 red onion 2 roma tomatoes 2 poblano peppers 2 tsps oregano 1/4 tsp cumin
1 cup orange juice For Chili: 5 pounds diced boneless pork butt 2 red onions chopped 5-10 cloves chopped 1/4 teaspoon cumin Chicken stock to cover
The Puree 1. Toast chiles and de-seed. 2. Char garlic, onion and tomatoes in a pan. 3. Roast peppers, peel and seed. 4. Combine above ingredients and orange juice in s pot and simmer for 30-45 minutes. 5. Season with salt and pepper and puree until smooth, then strain. The Pork Butt Chili 1. Brown meat over high heat. The deeper the brown, the more flavor. 2. Set aside meat, then add new oil, onion and garlic to the pot. Sauté until lightly brown. 4. Add cumin and toast briefly. 5. Add one cup puree (above). Cook for 10 minutes over low-medium heat. 6. Add pork and cover with chicken stock. 7. Simmer until tender and thick. 8. Season with salt, pepper, tabasco, cumin, lime and cilantro to desired taste.
FOOD &DRINK IS YOUR HEAD STILL IN A BLUR AFTER LAST NIGHT’S KEG STAND? WE’VE FOUND THE PERFECT CURE...
Awakening the Green
Fairy O
by CHELSEA LEPOSA
scar Wilde once said, “After the first glass, you see things as you wish they were. After the second, you see them as they are not. Finally, you see things as they really are, which is the most horrible thing in photo by Alex Udowenko the world.” Absinthe has enjoyed an important, yet mystifying role in the cultural green fairy,” as the drink is affectionhistories of the both the United States atly referred to, hit her peak during the and and Europe. Vincent Van Gogh’s Starry Bohemian Revolution in France th America at the end of the 19 centuNight, Mark Twain’s The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn and Wilde’s The Im- ry and became the drink of choice of portance of Being Earnest all probably many artists, writers and actors. The owe their existences to the devious popularity of absinthe in this country concoction. Absinthe’s century-long came to a halt in 1912 when the govban in the U.S. only helped solidify the ernment banned the drink, fearing its alleged negative effects and hallucinoaperitif’s illustrious fame. Traditionally, drinking absinthe is a genic properties. It was also banned in highly ritualized event. The elaborately most of Europe. The state Liquor Control Board catadecorated, slotted silver spoon is ballog now licenses eight brands of Abanced atop a cold crystal glass filled sinthe for purchase in Pennsylvania with the bright green liquid. A white liquor stores, insugar cube sits cluding Philadelupon the spoon, Perfectly Absinthe-Minded phia’s own Vieux waiting to sweeten 1½ oz. Vieux Carré Absinthe ½ oz. Sweet Vermouth Carré. The spirit the bitter elixir. A ½ oz. Dry Vermouth ranges in price large carafe slowly ¼ oz. Grand Marnier drips ice-cold wa- 3 Dashes Fee Brothers West Indian Orange Bitters from $40 to $75 for a 750mL bottle. ter over the glass, Just how did the Combine all ingredients into a mixing glass gradually melting chartreuse spirit filled with ice. Stir 20-25 times. Strain into a the sugar, and as martini glass and garnish with an orange peel. find its way to the the water beats stills of the Philarhythmically down delphia Distilling into the drink, a cloud begins to apCompany? pear. The louche. Drop by drop the “We wanted to be on the forefront,” drink begins to develop a milky opalesAndrew Auwerda, a representative cence and releases its aromatic herbal from the distillery, said. “It was a once flavors – the green fairy has awakened. in a lifetime opportunity to market a Medicinal use of wormwood, a key product without competitors.” ingredient in absinthe, can be traced The anise-flavored elixir was legalized back to ancient Egypt, but absinthe in May 2007, but not without strings. wasn’t distilled as a spirit until the Distillers and importers must follow 1790s in Switzerland. Legend credits Dr. Pierre Ordinaire as the creator three rules set by the Alcohol and Toof the modern absinthe recipe. “The bacco Trade Board, which includes insuring that the product is “thujone-
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Fourteenth Street staffers have diligently and lovingly curated a list of Philadelphia’s best brunches, all worthy of an early morning trek to epicurean elation. Get going - that headache’s not going to subside anytime soon! photos by COLIN KERRIGAN & SANDE FRIEDMAN free.” Absinthe is now widely available across the city in bars and restaurants, and even chain restaurants are offering their customers the chance to mingle with the green fairy. “I haven’t seen anyone lose their minds from it,” Todd Petty, a bartender at Hard Rock Café, said. At Hard Rock, customers can savor the absinthe at one of 15 seats at the red and yellow bar. Even with a Harley-Davidson motorcycle as a backdrop and many other bottles lined up behind the bar, the bottle of absinthe manages to stick out — luring people with its mystique. While the traditional method of consumption is still available, many current consumers of absinthe prefer it in cocktails. One reason absinthe is gaining a steady following, Aurwerda said, is because “mixology is becoming more important and popular.” “There is currently a big demand for classic cocktails and pre-Prohibition things,” Todd Rodgers, owner of Noble American Cookery, said. You can find absinthe in some of the signature cocktails at his Sansom Street restaurant. Try the Kansas City Card Shark if you’re feeling adventurous — it’s a unique, incisive drink composed of absinthe, brandy and other mixers. Rodgers believes the recent hike in absinthe’s popularity has to do with its former untouchable nature. He said, “Anything that was once prohibited is definitely something that appeals to people.” •
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Temple Rainbow
2156 N. Broad Street (at Susquehanna) 215-232-8347 BRUNCH: Every day, All day
Sabrina’s Café and Spencer’s Too
1804 Callowhill St. | 215-636-9061 | BRUNCH: All day, every day
Sabrina’s gets a ridiculous amount of hype – and rightfully so. Besides serving up gigantic portions of delicious breakfast classics and employing a wait staff that attentively keeps tabs on the status of your coffee, Sabrina’s serves breakfast, lunch and dinner all day, every day. You’re in luck even if you just can’t seem to get out of bed early enough for a
THE HANGOVER CURE
true “morning after.” The atmosphere in this Art Museum-area BYOB can only be described as charming, with dim lighting and an old-style diner feel. Get there early or call ahead for brunch this excellent – lest you spend your morning waiting for a table to clear.
by LAUREN CORREIA
Huevos Rancheros ($10.99) Not much can brighten up the drowsiness of a hangover like this fiery dish does. Fried blue corn tortillas topped with a smoky chipotle chorizo and red bean tomato sauce, fried eggs, limecilantro, sour cream and spicy red pepper guacamole… delicious!
So you went out and got wasted with your friends last night instead of studying for Psych and getting the requisite eight hours of sleep. Temple Rainbow feels your pain. With prices starting at just $2 and topping off at $8, this breakfast stop is perfect for the student on a budget. The menu offers the usual standby of toast and eggs, prepared however you wish, as well as steaks, cheeseburgers and other supplementary lunch dishes. Just be careful not to overeat and catch the “itis” – no falling asleep during class!
THE HANGOVER CURE
Hungry Man Special ($7.95) It’s impossible to walk away with an empty stomach or a headache after this one. Two hot cakes, two pieces of French toast, two eggs, home fries and bacon or sausage… you just might have to break out those elastic-waist sweatpants buried in the back of your closet.
ALSO TRY THIS
Breakfast Platter ($5.65)
by CHRISTEEN VILBRUN
ALSO TRY THIS
Stuffed Challah French Toast ($9.79)
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FOURTEENTHSTREET THE HANGOVER CURE
Honey’s Sit ’n Eat
Breakfast Numero Uno ($7) Two eggs, white rice, black beans and your choice of bacon, chorizo or vegetarian sausage round out a spectacular celebration of all things Tex-Mex and brunch on the same plate.
800 N. 4th St. (at Brown) | 215-925-1150 | BRUNCH: All Day, Every Day
As most Northern Liberties residents will tell you, there’s brunch… and then there’s brunch at Honey’s. The restaurant’s cozy, grandma’s-kitchen atmosphere and eclectic menu of Jewish and soul food staples has made it one
of the city’s most revered bruncheonettes, a place where hip young things in skinny jeans will wait more than two hours for a table (and never breathe a word of complaint). If your stomach’s grumblings don’t require immedi-
ate attention, head to Honey’s, put down your name, and settle down on the outside curb for a bit of people-watching. Trust us, the potato latkes are well worth the wait.
ALSO TRY THIS
by ANNA HYCLAK
Eggs Benedict ($9)
by CARLENE MAJORINO
Mugshots
THE HANGOVER CURE
Enfrijoladas ($7) They’re packed with just enough eggs, beans, and veggies to get rid of those morning-after shakes. Honey’s is BYO, so swing by the Foodery at 2nd and Poplar on your way there and pick up some beer – because everyone knows that the best way to cure a hangover is to start drinking again.
2100 Fairmount Ave. 267-514-7145 BRUNCH: All Day, Every Day
ALSO TRY THIS
The Bargain Breakfast ($3.95)
M-Room
15 W. Girard Ave. 215-739-5577 BRUNCH: Saturday & Sunday
Most people limit a visit to the M-Room to their popular nighttime shows, but by avoiding the early hours they’re truly missing out. The M-Room boasts all the familiar qualities of a dive bar we know and love: cheap drinks, regular patrons, and charismatic bartenders. Yet it’s still widely unknown that the M-Room serves food — including a solid weekend brunch. You won’t find many surprises on their menu, but that’s why we like it. It’s simple, greasy, diner-worthy fare.
THE HANGOVER CURE
Hungry Hipster ($8) There’s not a trace of irony in the M-Room’s famous Hungry Hipster meals. There are four hefty versions to choose from, depending on what you’re craving, all for under $8. If you found yourself doing too many Citywide Specials (that’s
16
a shot of whiskey with a PBR to wash it down) at the M-Room the night before, nothing settles your belly the next morning more than the meat-laden version of the Hungry Hipster: three eggs any way you like, two strips of bacon, two sausage links, two slices of scrapple or ham, French toast, pancakes and roasted potatoes. Whew.
ALSO TRY THIS
worthy fruit plate to hold you over until your veggie and faux meat meal arrives. Unlike most places that carry one standard, sub-par, vegan-friendly option, MiLah has dedicated its entire brunch to those among the animal-free crowd.
Monte Cristo ($7.50)
by DANIELLE ZIMMERMAN
MiLah Vegetarian
218 S. 16th St. (at Chancellor) 215-732-8888 BRUNCH: Saturday & Sunday
Better known for being a top-notch take-out destination in Center City, MiLah Vegetarian whips up a surprisingly impressive weekend brunch. Inside, the tables are packed together, forcing patrons to talk amongst each other in hushed tones. After taking your order, the attentive wait staff treats you to a nibble-
THE HANGOVER CURE
Yards Beer-Battered Seitan over Belgian Waffles ($10) If you’re looking for a true gutbusting remedy, this powerhouse breakfast just makes sense. Vegans may even feel a little guilty for having so thoroughly enjoyed MiLah’s creative take on fried chicken and waffles. Carnivores will leave scratching their heads, unusually satisfied from the meat-free meal.
ALSO TRY THIS
Coconut-bronzed Mushroom ($3)
- DZ
White Dog Café
3420 Samson St. 215-386-9224 BRUNCH: Saturday & Sunday
This University City café might make you wish you’d
at least remembered to brush you hair after your allnight drinking binge. Set in an old Victorian brownstone, White Dog Café has worked its way up the restaurant ranks to become a nationally renowned eatery suitable for even the most sophisticated palate. Founded by social activist Judy Wicks, the restaurant is an active promoter of sustainable and healthy living and focuses on finding fresh, local ingredients for its sweet and savory dishes. This is a brunch you can feel good about. Wash down your green cuisine with one of the restaurant’s top-shelf American beers (from local breweries, of course), or try its very own Leg Lifter Lager.
THE HANGOVER CURE
Harvest Bread Basket ($6) These homemade breakfast pastries and breads will saturate every remaining drop of last night’s booze. Tasty spreads like honey, apple and pear butter will add a
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sweet sugar kick to help you think straight (and remember what you wish you didn’t).
ALSO TRY THIS
Pear and Blue Cheese Panini ($13)
by MELANIE MENKEVICH
Memphis Taproom 2331 E. Cumberland St. 215-425-4460 BRUNCH: Saturday & Sunday
When the Memphis Taproom opened in Spring 2008, it quickly claimed its place as a neighborhood favorite. Despite its stellar team – which includes Chef Jesse Kimball of Matyson and Lacroix fame – and extensive Belgian beer offerings, Memphis Taproom maintains a cozy, unpretentious atmosphere. The restaurant has gained notoriety throughout the city for its oddball happy hours, like the First Wednesday Redheaded Happy Hour, and its monthly Mommy & Me gettogethers. On Saturday and Sunday afternoons, Mem-
phis Taproom’s tiny dining room is often packed to the brim. Those who are forced into waiting don’t complain – they simply order a drink at the bar.
THE HANGOVER CURE
Steak Bomb Spuds ($13) If you’re aiding a serious hangover, this is the only entrée that will do. It employs all of our brunch favorites in true atomic bomb fashion. Provolone cheese-smothered steak, pepperoni, potatoes, peppers and onions topped with an egg, sunnyside-up. Eat up all of the food on your plate and head back home for a nice, long nap.
ALSO TRY THIS Belgian Witbier Mimosa ($5)
- DZ
Cantina Los Caballitos
1651 E. Passyunk Ave. 215-755-3550 BRUNCH: Saturday & Sunday
A South Philly favorite for Tex-Mex fare, the Cantina is a surprising-but-
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delicious brunch hangout. Easily the brightest building on East Passyunk, its hot orange facade conveys a personality all its own, while the inside resembles a vibrant Mexican fiesta with its colorful lights and streamers. Indie music has been known to blast from the speakers as the Cantina’s staff runs around dishing out fajitas, quesadillas and other Mexican favorites, complete with complimentary homemade chips with salsa. An appropriate home for the breakfast burrito on weekends, the Cantina also serves up four different kinds of huevos to satisfy that earlyafternoon craving. If you're more of a traditional morning eater, the menu also includes items like pancakes and French toast – with their own Southern twist.
The restaurant may get its clever name because of its location directly across from the Eastern State Penitentiary, but in reality, Mugshots is a cozy, ultralocal daytime destination. Stop by anytime after sunrise and you’ll find patrons diligently working on laptops and sipping smoothies. Vegetarians need not worry – Mugshots prides itself on supporting fair-trade, buying local and providing a variety of vegetarian and vegan options. With a brand new room for extra seating, it’s easy to enjoy a book and a coffee here on any weekday. Beware of weekend mornings, however. The shop gets crowded and it’s not uncommon to see four or five people squeezed onto a single sofa.
THE HANGOVER CURE
Venice Island ($4.50-$5.50)
This perfectly sweet drink, which mixes strawberries, orange juice and bananas with vanilla soy milk, pulls double duty by quenching your thirst and curing what’s left of your headache. Round two anyone?
ALSO TRY THIS
The Scapegoat ($6.95)
- CM 17
FOURTEENTHSTREET THE HANGOVER CURE
Hawthornes Cafe 738 S. 11th St. (at Fitzwater) 215-627-3012 BRUNCH: Friday, Saturday & Sunday
Located in Bella Vista, Hawthornes Cafe is a beer boutique, gourmet eatery and quiet spot to crack open a cold one, play a couple of board games and relax. If you’re the kind of person who can’t make such important decisions as whether to order breakfast or lunch before you’ve had your morning coffee, you’re in luck – you can order a lunch entrée and share a breakfast for dessert! The impressively stocked menu will relinquish any thoughts of the impending “food babies” your girth might inherit. You’ll leave feeling refreshed and revitalized – or slightly drunk from all of the Yards brews you just threw back.
The Angry Neighbor ($8) This sandwich, named after an actual neighbor who complained about the construction of Hawthornes, is a veggie delight. A combination of sharp cheddar, avocado and homemade grainy mustard infused with five types of beer, this sandwich will add a hop to your lunch – literally.
ALSO TRY THIS Waffles Bananas Foster ($8)
- MM
Saint Stephen’s Green
1701 Green St/ 215-769-5000 BRUNCH: Saturday & Sunday
The unique food selection at Saint Stephen’s Green sets this Irish-inspired gastropub apart from the rest. Where else in Philadelphia can you find cornmeal-crisped calamari or a catfish BLT? Just as many items on the menu are seasonal, so is the pub’s atmosphere,
y xe
with a fireplace roaring through the winter and outdoor seating during the warmer months. If your idea of a hangover solution is drinking more, Saint Stephen’s has you covered. The restaurant’s extensive wine list and domestic and imported beers are served at its intimate basement bar.
S
THE HANGOVER CURE Morning Walk ($11) There might not be too much walking done after this monstrous meal. Black and white pudding, rashers (Irish bacon), bangers (Irish sausage), fried tomato, baked beans, muffin and two eggs done any style will fill you up like nothing else.
ALSO TRY THIS
The Croque Madame ($10.00)
- LC
Swift Half Pub
1001 N. 2nd St. | 215-923-4600 | BRUNCH: Saturday & Sunday
Tucked away in a corner of Northern Liberties’ sprawling Piazza at Schmidt’s, Swift Half Pub offers a friendly, jovial atmosphere, extensive beer list and all the greasy-but-scrumptious food of a traditional British pub – minus the jetlag-inducing transatlantic flight. Expect speedy service and witty banter from the waiters, lots of cheering on game day and a jukebox and dartboard to keep you occupied while you wait for your food or a table. Best of all, this gastropub has weekly access to the Piazza’s Saturday morning farmers’ market where they pick up fresh, local products to use in their brunch specialties.
THE HANGOVER CURE Breakfast burrito ($9) A hearty serving of eggs, peppers, onions, tomatoes and jack cheese, topped with roasted tomato and black bean salsa and served with a potato and caramelized onion hash.
Your hangover will be gone before you hit the bottom of the plate.
ALSO TRY THIS
Apple Cinnamon Pancakes ($7)
- AH
Who’s that girl?
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Turn the page to find out 19
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be working at a car dealership. He was expelled from North Catholic High School for Boys during his sophomore year because of a fight he had with a teacher who mocked him for being gay. Later, he got kicked out of an online school for truancy. As a Plan B, Johnny intends to get his GED and then go to Jean Madeline Aveda Institute. But what is Plan A? Johnny Boy is a singer, comedian, model and diva sensation. He makes money off of his YouTube videos – but almost stopped because they chas-
tised him for being too vulgar. “I always had this ghetto persona, so I posted a few videos showcasing my crazy side,” Johnny Boy said. “It was mainly [out of] boredom. I had dropped out of high school and had nothing to do all day so I would wake up at, like, 3 p.m. and turn on my camera and bitch to the whole world, and people found it funny.” Yeah, he said things like “pussy,” “dildo” and “penis.” But YouTube knew that was his deal. “I had my first video on [YouTube] in February 2007 and that Web site was nothing back then compared to what it is now,” Johnny Boy said. “Bitches.” He was excited when he was first offered a partnership with the company – not because he was going to be paid, but because he was finally getting recognition for attracting and inspiring viewers. He had a lot of hits, and YouTube wanted in on the action. But he set everything up on his account, including Google ad sense, then went on vacation – and when he came back, he found that he was no longer a partner. No phone call or e-mail, just cut out of the deal. He had to wonder: if YouTube thought he was too crude, then why did they ever offer him the partnership in the first place? “From the bottom of my heart, I feel like they don’t support me,” he said in a YouTube video explaining to his fans why he stopped posting after he lost the partnership. “This Web site is a part of my past.” In December, he had 22,000 unread messages in his inbox and his followers were posting comments online, claiming that he stopped making videos
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It’s Johnny Boy, bitches! With the recent release of his EP and clothing line, this boy just wants to be a girl and have fun. But is the world ready for his trannylicious style and daring sense of humor?
W
by MELANIE MENKEVICH photos by KIM WOOD
ith his long, platinum blonde hair, pouty pink lips and milelong legs, Johnny Boy is usually the prettiest girl at a party. And he’s more than just pretty. Johnny Boy just released his debut album, Trannylicious, which peaked at No. 40 on the iTunes Pop Charts, and his clothing line of the same name is
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now available in stores. Not only that, but he’s been a YouTube superstar since he was 16. “It’s crazy to think of what my life would be like now if I never did a YouTube video,” the 19-year-old tranny said in his trademark ghetto Northeast Philly accent. “Like, what would I be doing right now? I’d be working at, like, a car dealership.” If Johnny Wallace, more commonly known to his YouTube followers as “Johnny Boy,” didn’t have his popular Internet persona, he probably would
because he wanted to be a boy again. So Johnny Boy came back to YouTube and posted one last video in response to their claims. The video, called “the turning point,” got more 30,000 hits. His followers had missed his offensive comedy – and YouTube took note. The next day, he had six missed calls from the company. Now he has his partnership back – and spends several hours bleeping out the curses on the videos he posts at least twice a week.
lace became Johnny Boy. “Johnny Boy is a more exaggerated version of myself,” he said. “I’m cocky. I can be a bitch. I talk ghetto. But Johnny Boy is, like, me amped up – not faking it, but acting a bit. But it’s still part of me. Everyone has two different sides. I have the comedy side and then the part that has a story to tell. One of the main reasons I’m popular is because I never had surgery or took pills and I’m a boy, but put me next to a boy and I don’t look like one.”
ohnny Boy’s come a long way from the person he was at 14 – a person who was so insecure that he refused to walk down the street without his mother, paralyzed with fear that someone would say something mean to him. When he made his first YouTube video, he was still at North Catholic and didn’t think anyone would watch it. Then one day, he was walking down the hall and heard someone quote his video. The next day at school, everyone knew – and they weren’t so nice about it. “I think that’s what honestly got me popular,” he said. “All these shit-talkers.” He acted like it was no big thing, but his classmates’ taunts pissed him off – so he would go home and yell about it in his camera. “I started posting videos mainly because I had times where I felt alone, and I already had a following on MySpace, so instead of posting a blog I just picked up my camera and spoke what I was feeling,” he said. “And people understood what I was going through. It helped me a lot.” Practically overnight, Johnny Wal-
ohnny Boy wouldn’t even know he was a boy if people didn’t keep reminding him. “I mean, technically, I am a boy, but ever since I can remember, I’ve been feminine. I think women are beautiful and that’s what I am,” he said. He clearly has a “dick” – but talks about his “pussy.” “I don’t consider myself a tranny,” he said. “Like, if I woke up tomorrow and no one reminded me that I did YouTube videos, I honestly would just think I was a girl. ’Cause before I go out, I put my push-up bra on, I put my fake boobs in, I do my makeup and my hair. I don’t do anything like a boy does.” He stops to think. “Oh, no, I pee like a boy!” He does. Johnny Wallace has never had an operation or taken hormones to alter his sex – yet. He’s recently started taking a birth control pill to get his body adjusted to estrogen and he’s ordered pills to lower his testosterone. He doesn’t necessarily see this as the first step to becoming a girl – hormones keep his skin soft and prevent further maturation of his male physique. If he does decide to have surgery, he wants to do it while he’s young. “I don’t want to be 30 and want [the surgery] and think, ‘I could have done it earlier’,” he said. “I don’t want >>>
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I started posting videos mainly because I had times where I felt alone... I just picked up my camera and spoke what I was feeling. And people understood what I was going through. It helped me a lot.
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FOURTEENTHSTREET to be 30 and dress like a girl but still be the camera. “You’d think having a big a boy. I’d want it while I’m young and mouth would be a good thing in a restill have stuff to experience.” lationship, you know what I mean? He thinks he will make the decision It’s like, what’s wrong with you guys? by his 21st birthday – but he already That’s a plus here in Philadelphia.” knows that he definitely wants boobs. Sexual innuendos aside, he wants Johnny Boy admits he hasn’t done more and he thinks he deserves it. much research on the surgery that “In all honesty, I have the worst would make him a woman, but he did problem with relationships,” he said. watch MTV’s True Life and knows how “If you know me in real life or you know much a boob job me personcosts. ally, then you “[Sex-change know that surgery] is, like, I do get hit $40,000. That’s on a lot, I do a lot. That’s, like, get asked www.youtube.com/user/johnnyboyxo a mobile home! out a lot, or Just to snip it off? but I just am Twitter: @johnnyboxo I think they should so strongcharge that much to willed and so change a vagina into a penis, ’cause strong-minded.” He either turns guys that seems really hard, ’cause how away or makes them run, he said. could it even look like one? I’m asking “I need a psychiatrist or something.” you and I’m the tranny,” he said, laugh- He isn’t just referring to his relationship ing at himself. issues. Every morning, he puts on his Victransgendered person has a diftoria’s Secret push up bra, and he has ferent mental perception of their real A-cup boobs to fill it, too. He used gender or role than the two genders to be overweight, but then dropped 90 that exist in modern society. pounds at Bally’s and toned everything A transsexual is a person whose in– except for his chest. ternal representation of their physical
The many faces of
Johnny Boy
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by DANIELLE ZIMMERMAN
YOGA You know the drill. Yoga is the alignment of the mind, body and spirit. It’s come far from its roots as a meditative, body-toning experience – now it’s generally so low-impact that its practitioners use the classes to catch up on gossip with friends.
TEMPLE IBC 1701 N. 15th St. Tues., Wed., Thurs.: 7am – 8am
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ust because he’s popular in Philadelphia doesn’t mean he has a lot of friends. Or, at least, a lot of real friends. “I really don’t think I’m famous,” Johnny Boy said. “I know that I’m popular in Philadelphia but you never can tell who’s real nowadays. It’s sad to say, but I don’t have any really good friends. Most of my friends would not be friends with me if I wasn’t popular. There are so many phony people who just want to be in my top eight on MySpace. Everyone will act like they like me and then will turn around and talk shit behind my back.” He’s not too lucky in relationships, either. “Johnny Boy and relationships, they just don’t go together,” he said in one of his videos. “They’re, like, nada.” He wants a boyfriend and a relationship. He just isn’t sure anyone can handle him. “It takes a strong man to love a luscious, ghetto tranny like me who has a big mouth,” he said, waving his blond head back and forth in front of
HEALTH&LIVING
HOT YOGA It was inevitable that someone would eventually come along and rob yoga of all its daintiness. Enter hot yoga. A typical session is practiced for an hour and a half in a room heated to a sweat-inducing 105 degrees. This activity is not for the faint of heart, as nausea and dizziness are likely side effects for first-timers.
sex does not match their physiological sex – such as a man who believes without a doubt that he is a female, or a woman who believes she is a man. So who is Johnny Boy? He loves KFC and fuzzy dildos. He’s a real boy who wants to be a real girl. He wants to move to Los Angeles to be a singer, but he wants a friend to move with him. He has a crush on Chase Utley and wants a version of the Twilight movie starring trannies. He lives in the Greater Northeast but hangs out in Fishtown. He is funny, real, sad and fake. He is as normal as anyone, really, because everyone is a little bit fucked up. “I identify as me,” Johnny Boy said. “So many people ask about my gender and what I like to be called and I don’t have a position, really. I’m comfortable with whatever people want to call me as long as it’s respectful. “But I am, and have always had, the mind of a woman.” He is himself. Herself. Itself. It really doesn’t matter. It’s Johnny Boy, bitches. •
BIKRAM’S YOGA COLLEGE OF INDIA 1520 Samson St. Daily
LAUGHING YOGA
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HIP HOP
TREADMILL
Fast-paced and impulsive, hip-hop music provides the perfect exercise motivation. Over the past few years, hip-hop-style workouts have gained popularity – not only do you pump your heart and burn calories, you can also learn a few more moves for the dance floor.
When weather makes jogging unbearable, the treadmills at the gym are always there and willing to take you back, even if you’ve ignored them for months. But despite their reliability and timeless appeal (the first treadmills were used in 1817), we’re constantly looking to upgrade with newer, fancier workout equipment.
TEMPLE IBC 1701 N. 15th St. Tues., Thurs.: 7:30pm - 8:30pm
TEMPLE IBC 1707 N. 15th St. Weekdays: 6:30am – 10pm Weekends: 12pm – 8pm
ZUMBA Sure, the motto is cheesy: “Ditch the workout. Join the party.” But Zumba is the new buzz word in the fitness world. The music is catchy and exotic, with lyrics sung in international languages. The moves are so sexy and natural that you’ll feel like you’re just grooving along to the beat of the songs, rather than working out.
TEMPLE IBC 1707 N. 15th St. Mon., Wed., Fri.: 7:30pm – 8:30pm
CAPOEIRA
Yoga is a great way to relieve stress. That is, until you start worrying about how you look in those tight yoga pants or what the guy behind you thinks about your butt or the fact that everyone can hear your stomach growl during the meditation sessions. Laughing yoga takes the edge off by turning participants into squealing, belly-holding howlers for a straight hour.
This high-energy exercise combines dancing, self-defense and game play. It was originally brought to Brazil by African slaves as a way to practice fighting without letting their masters know what they were doing. For those who’ve never tried it, capoeira looks like an elaborately choreographed scene from The Matrix – slow-moving, minimal contact karate.
WATER TOWER RECREATION CENTER 209 Hartwell Ln. Thursdays: 6:30pm – 7:30pm
THE PHILADELPHIA CAPOEIRA ARTS CENTER 756 S. 11th St, 2nd floor see full website for details: PhillyCapoeira.com/about.html
ROCK-N-GO “Awkward” is a word one could use to describe the Rock-N-Go. You straddle it like a horse and then it moves back and forth thiiiiiiissssss slow. It’s kind of like an adult version of that pony machine outside the supermarket – except without the cute miniature leather reins. Are these abrupt thrusts actually helping us tone?
ROCK-N- GO ZERO IMPACT WORKOUT MACHINE ($300) AsSeenOnTV.com
CRAZY FIT BODY VIBRATION PLATE The draw of the Crazy Fit Body Vibration Plate is that all you have to do is stand on the vibrating plate and supposedly your body will benefit. However, it seems that standing on the plate is unnecessary, as some devotees simply sit or lean with one arm on the machine. Also, the machine may cause excessive shaking of your internal organs. Yippee.
CRAZY FIT BODY VIBRATION PLATE ($280) Amazon.com
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The
even use it to brush your teeth. Well, I had to try this. What they don’t tell you is, even though the soap has a pleasant peppermint smell, it tastes like vomit. I did, however, enjoy using it as a body wash, as it left me feeling like I’d used Listerine on my entire body.
GREEN
Day 2:
After a brisk walk home from Center City, I felt the hunger tugging at my stomach like an impatient child. Oh, the fantastic meals I could make! My mind was racing. I could make some fried chicken, or a burger, or… oh, fuck, I’m pretending to be a vegetarian. This is the perfect time to try the seitan chipotle sausages I purchased, I might have thought... if I was an asshole. I wasn’t sure how to prepare my fake meat, so I guessed and braised the links in some vegetable broth. This was the sequence of events that followed: I made the sausages, I ate the sausages and then proceeded to regret the previous two actions. The texture was akin to wet toilet paper. They tasted like pure cumin. I felt as though I was trying to digest the Spanish Inquisition. I lied down in my cold room – because going green means little to no heat, apparently – and tried to exorcise my gastrointestinal demons. This was not to be; they wanted to be set free. So, I got a first-person perspective of a meal in reverse and, let me tell you, those sausages taste the same regardless of which direction they’re headed in. Eventually, I decided to try the food thing again and made a twice-baked tofu casserole. I pressed the tofu and marinated it in a soy and white wine sauce and
diaries
Can this environmental hazard be transformed into an eco-friendly health nut in just three days?
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by THOMAS MATES
y name is Thomas Mates and I live on meat, nicotine and bitter cynicism. Most people would agree this isn’t the most environmentally friendly way to exist. So, to see how the other side lives, I’m going to “go green” for the next three days. This means using little to no heat, trying out that thing called “recycling,” walking or biking instead of taking public transit, cutting down on packaging and keeping a strict vegetarian diet that will favor organic and all-natural foods. I’m regretting this decision already.
Day 1:
I started my first day of green living snowed in at my girlfriend’s house. Since my girlfriend has taste buds that she doesn’t hate, there wasn’t too much for me to eat (I’m convinced that health food nuts must feel vindictive toward their tongues). Because she felt some pity for me, my lady decided to help me route around for some form of sustenance. There was some whole-wheat pasta hidden in the depths of her cabinet, which I availed myself to, and let me tell you… it was gritty and unsatisfying. In fact, everything about the process of going green is gritty and unsatisfying, especially the toilet paper. I have to use toilet paper made from 100% re-
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cycled paper. I got to save a tree and pretend I was in the Soviet Bloc all in one visit to the bathroom. It seems to me that going green has become a religion. There are the zealots, those people who preach hellfire and brimstone until they gather as many converts as possible. Then there are the people who go green whenever it’s convenient to assuage their guilt about the various non-green behaviors they keep (which, if they believe the zealots, are probably killing the planet). Of course, being among the chosen people, there is nothing that can assuage my guilt. It’s bred into me. In an attempt to be more efficient and cut down on packaging, I purchased some hemp soap. Hemp soap can be used to clean everything from your floors to your hair to your body, dishes, toilet and much, much more. I have to admit that it is actually pretty impressive. Apparently, you can
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Really? C’mon! A study done by the American Dietetic Association showed that vegetarians are at higher risk of eating disorders. This may be linked to a newly diagnosed eating disorder called orthorexia nervosa, the symptoms of which cause the subject to obsessively eat foods that they consider healthy.
Foods and other goods produced in the U.S. require a three-year certification process before they can be labeled “organic.” However, when you see the word “natural” on a product. it means absolutely nothing and can legally be applied to just about anything.
Many “natural” soy bean products are produced with a chemical called hexane. Hexane is a petroleum derivative that is also a neurotoxin and a “hazardous air pollutant,” according to the Environmental Protection Agency.
The soy bean industry is one of the leading causes of deforestation in the Amazon rainforest, according to the Earth Policy Institute.
a little sugar. Then I baked it for an hour and added it to whole-wheat pasta, organic crème of mushroom soup and some cheese. I then baked all of this for another hour. While the recipe sounds good, the end result was a big letdown. Well, actually, only the tofu really tasted bad. The flavor just wasn’t there and the texture was squishy. I was really hoping it would be chewier, but alas, no meat consistency there. The experience didn’t do much to calm my stomach, either.
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Day 3:
It’s almost over! This was my prevailing thought for much of the day, especially on my freezing walk to work, through the ice and the snow, uphill both ways. I lugged my recyclables with me so that I could deposit them into one of the city’s many new recycling receptacles. I considered just sneaking my papers and plastics in with a neighbor’s, but figured it wasn’t quite in the spirit of my self-inflicted punishment. Fortunately, I spent much
of the day at work, which provided me with ample distraction from my temporary green lifestyle. Work ended and I began my walk home with a hand-rolled cigarette for warmth. Handrolled cigarettes are actually more eco-friendly than their factory-packaged brethren – there is less packaging and less energy expended in their production. I personally haven’t mastered the art of hand-rolling cigarettes, so I had to rely on the kindness of a more experienced friend. If you don’t like the taste sensation that is loose tobacco in your mouth, don’t smoke hand-rolled. I couldn’t even take a deep and satisfying drag, because every time I did, tobacco would fly down my throat and make me gag. As the clock ticked down to midnight, I anxiously awaited my return to normalcy. When the hour struck, I celebrated by turning my heat back on and making myself a sandwich containing no less than three different types of dead animal. There was cow and turkey and two kinds of pig. It was glorious. You really can’t believe everything that people say about going green. It’s become an industry, and like any other industry, it wants your money. I personally never got any impression that I was helping the planet – I just felt cold and broke, because, in case you haven’t noticed, organic food is ridiculously expensive. In my opinion, it seems like the green industry is lining its pockets with the money of the feebleminded. Saving the world is all fine and dandy, but there has to be a better way – a way that doesn’t involve tofu and ice-cold showers. •
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HEALTH&LIVING
U N E A R T H E D
Double-breasted suit jacket (1960s), $77 Oxford Shirt (1980s), $7 Brown bowtie (1970s), $15 Beatle boots (1960s), $48
We played dress-up at these little-explored vintage troves. by NICOLE SAYLOR photos by MARIA POUCHNIKOVA modeling by SAMANTHA RISE ROBERSON and BEN HYCLAK
REVERIE BOUTIQUE 205 Girard Ave.
Vibe: Hello, Hemingway! Go here for: That perfect pea coat Quirkiest thing in inventory: A Jacquelyn Smith Charlie’s Angel’s doll Outstanding factor: Art along with handmade goods Price range: $$-$$$
If you’re a fan of Bogie and Bacall films and dream of a time when chivalry was not dead, then Reverie Boutique is your Shangri-La. Walking into the store, you’ll be greeted by the sound of low-fi standards spinning on the turntable and a warm “Hello!” from the store’s three vivacious co-owners. When Brady Sanders, Ana Troncoso and Christa Cywinski met two and half years ago at Quince Fine Foods on Girard Ave., they instantly bonded over vintage fashion and their mutual desire to create a sustainable business that also supported local artists. Out of this desire, Reverie was born. “Brady is sort of fashion forward, Ana’s the collector and I’m the artist liaison,” Cywinski said. The result: an intricately displayed showroom packed with classic pieces from the 1940s through the 1980s, as well as vinyl, art and memorabilia. “I love ’80s cuts,” Sanders said of her fashion vision. “They’re reminiscent of the ’30s, with big shoulders and little waists.” Reverie also represents local
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Embellished jumpsuit (1960s), $38 Handmade Nina Campellone charm, $50
artists, like jewelry designer Nina Campellone, who weaves vintage semi-precious stones and sterling silver wire into jewelry. In addition, the three ladies take part in Second Thursday, an event that allows local businesses on Girard Ave. to feature local artists, live music and food. With around 120 consigners, Reverie always has something new to offer on its racks. “Anna’s been collecting vintage from her lifetime,” Cywinksi said of her partner’s extensive wardrobe, which includes embellished jumpsuits from the ’70s, ’50s fur hats and mod sheath dresses ala ’60s miniskirt inventor Mary Quant. Don’t be surprised if you walk in empty-handed and leave with a brown shopping bag packed with netted
pillbox hats, satin evening gloves and a Count Basie record.
Sazz Vintage 38 N 3rd St.
Vibe: Janis Joplin goes disco Go here for: Leather boots and shaggy fur Quirkiest thing in inventory: Moon Boots Outstanding factor: Baby vintage – like tiny Levis jackets Price: $$$
When browsing through Sazz’s racks, which are stuffed with lime-green bellbottoms, distressed
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AC/DC tees and Cosby sweaters, you’ll wish your parents had held onto their teenage threads for you. Vintage maven Amanda Saslow has created the ultimate shopping destination by stocking up on all the things Mom and Dad rocked once upon a time. Ten years ago, while hunting for an embroidered western shirt for her dad, Saslow discovered that vintage and thrift was the way to go for quality, one-ofa-kind pieces. It wasn’t long before she’d started her own one-rack vintage business by selling pieces that she collected on Ebay. Saslow quickly moved on to sazzvintage.com and then expanded
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even further by setting up shop in Philadelphia in 2008. Even though Sazz was originally a men’s vintage store, the inventory is now about 40 percent women’s clothing, according to Saslow. But it’s really the iconic men’s fashions that set Sazz apart from other vintage stores. Every decade is represented, whether it’s ’70s disco, ’80s street style or ’50s rockabilly. “There’s such style in men’s vintage that you don’t see [in modern clothing],” Saslow said. According to Saslow, the key to vintage is to simply have fun with your clothes. Quirky vintage tees, like a bootleg Grateful Dead shirt, are actually some of the top-selling items at Sazz. It’s also the best place to find boots, Hawaiian shirts and Don Draper-worthy suits.
Two Percent to Glory 1817 Frankford Ave.
Vibe: Mom and Dad’s closet (when they were cool) Go here for: Paper-thin tees and western shirts Quirkiest thing in inventory: A green sparkly jumpsuit that belonged to Isaac Hayes Outstanding factor: ’80s Members Only jackets and Beatle boots Price: $-$$
Spend five minutes in this Fishtown boutique and you’ll be searching for a spot to stick your bed. From the painted model airplanes swinging in the front window to the sofa/end table hybrid that looks like it was pilfered from Eric Foreman’s living room, Two Percent to Glory feels like your cool older sister’s closet. And if you think the sale racks are impressive, you should see owner Sarah Anderson’s back stock. When Anderson started Two Percent to Glory, she originally wanted a space to store her vintage clothing collection. Instead of renting a U-haul garage, she opted for the ground floor of a Philadelphia row home – and decided to share the vintage wealth. The Iowa native’s Middle American roots are evident in the shop’s collection of Woodstock-worthy
dresses and cowboy boots. “I don’t care if it’s trendy or not,” Anderson said. “It’ll come around again.” Anderson is a firm believer in sticking with the basics, like plain white tees and jeans, then adding vintage pieces into the mix – like rope belts, military jackets and bling that would trump Mr. T.’s. Vintage fashion is all about a “mixing of high and low,” according to Anderson. “You can get away with more adventurous things.” On top of it all, Anderson is also an aspiring designer. The boutique’s back room is her studio, and she’s filled it with vintage work lamps, a cutting table and look boards covered with pages of inspiration from magazines. Anderson described her line, Essae, as “wild separates” with eclectic, vintageinspired design elements. Don’t be afraid to ask Anderson for styling tips – if you’re looking for something specific, chances are she has just the thing hidden somewhere in her infinite clothing arsenal. With a wall of vintage tees, sweaters and denim jackets, she really is the Willy Wonka of vintage fashion. •
Gingko beaded and suede sweater (1980s), $50 Guess jean shorts (1990s), $30 Yellow Stephanie Kelian for Nine West Pumps (1990s), $40 (1970s), $15 Vintage bangles $8-40
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EndOfTheRoad
Love is difficult in any language.
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by MARY COYLE
swallowed a wince along with my first sip of the unfamiliar Spanish brew, determined to enjoy the best beer that a two Euro coin could buy. As the alcohol burned down my throat, a sharp glint caught my eye through the smoky haze of the bar, yanking my gaze from the brown liquid foaming in the bottle. A pair of deep-set chocolate eyes met my own dull brown. Dark, unruly corkscrews framed a chiseled, cream-colored face. A quick grin, then a dimple… no, two. And there, projecting from the central flesh of his pert nose, a metal ring that flashed underneath the lights. I gaped, dumbstruck, at this Spanish Adonis. He continued pulling draughts, seemingly unaware that my entire body had just short-circuited. His sex appeal oozed like a waterlogged sponge, one of superb form, whose ears sported cavernous gauges that set my heart aflutter. I knocked back half the bottle, in some effort to temper the flames smoldering just beneath my chest. Oh, yes. Yes. A flush crept up my neck and my hands fumbled as he shot a glance in my direction. I cursed the gray turtleneck sweater I wore and the group of American students I sat with, the same ones I had been laughing with only moments before, giddy with the freedom of our first week abroad. I studied the various scuffs on my boots for what must have been hours before surrendering to the urge to peek in the direction of the bar. Alas, he had disappeared. Not until several months later did I learn his name was Javier; by that time, I’d also gathered that he only tended the bar and schmoozed with patrons on the weekends. I dragged my girlfriends into the two-story bar at least twice a week, on the pretext of jamming to the excellent rotation of classic rock cuts. Less a bar for Americans than Spanish men with an affinity for mullets, denim cutoffs, and smoking assorted herbs, I ogled Javier when I wasn’t being gawped at myself. Soon forgotten was the inquiry I’d made of my host mother, Maria – a woman I often felt as though I towered over, a petite bottle-blonde whose funky
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jewelry rivaled my own. During my first week in the apartment, I asked if she had a curfew for her students. Maria looked at me, perplexed; then shok her head – charades were the only way to guarantee we understood each other. “Cuando tu quieres, Mary. Pasalo bien.” Whenever you want, Mary. Have fun. Week after week, my girlfriends and I rambled through the darkened, centuries-old streets surrounding the cathedral. Weekends, I lounged on the second floor of Javier’s bar, watching him clear tables of booze-soaked debris. Weeknights, we ventured into a discoteca that featured dated hip-hop and the entire discography of Beyoncé. A personal favorite, I ignored schoolwork in favor of its multiple playings of “Single Ladies.” One night, sweaty and decidedly un-sober, I sunk onto a bench after hours of the required bump and grind. My drooping eyes combed the room, finally resting on what seemed like a vaguely familiar form, a purple shirt wrapped around a muscled back. Delightful tingles shot down my spine. Javier turned to his right, shifting his attention to the man next to him. Intent on watching him slouch against the bar, I hardly noticed the half-full beer bottle on the floor until my foot knocked it over. My fingers brushed a strange hand, with digits as pale as my own, as I crouched down to pick up the shattered pieces. My pulse throbbed, its thunder drowning out that from the club’s speakers. Ever so slightly, I raised my head; my face met the amused grin, not of Javier, but his friend. He continued to hold my hand, and leaning in, his breath stroked my ear as he asked if I was all right. Oh. Oh, yes. Fernando wandered with me through the steep cobble-stoned streets, all but empty in those dim hours before dawn. Hesitantly, he linked his fingers with mine, a sweet gesture that persuaded
me to detour at his piso, only a block from where I lived with Maria. Later, I tiptoed out of Fernando’s apartment, a smug smile complementing the mussed state of my hair. We had lingered at the door; each of my halfhearted attempts to leave had been stifled, gently, as he covered my mouth with his. Finally, I pecked his cheek, and slid through the crack of the open door into the gloomy lighting of the hall. As I softly shut the door to the apartment, I heard footsteps approaching from the other end of the dark hallway. Carefully, I turned and crept around the corner, only to see a familiar silhouette standing in the shadows in front of me. There stood Javier, one arm propped on the wall as he faced me. I pictured the shadow and liner smeared around my eyes, my half-zipped jacket. It took approximately a millisecond to realize he was waiting for me to move from the front of the door –Javi’s door. Javi’s apartment. Javi’s bedroom. I squeaked. He cocked an eyebrow. I sprinted down the stairs and into the lobby, tripping over the black wedges of my boots. Inhaling, deeply, I assured myself that several hours of sleep and abuela’s fabada soup would erase the humiliation of this memory. As I ambled home, a brief stretch of street I’d been following for months, I closed my eyes and lifted my head toward the sun. Its early morning rays embraced me, teasing the corners of my mouth into a smile, a silly grin that pops up whenever I remember Javier. •
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Richie’s