Yet Another Season

By Rita Hamilton

When I was a young mother, one of the phrases I uttered on a pretty regular basis was “I can’t wait to be an empty nester.” The reality was that when it happened, I was devastated. My daughter got married, and my son entered the Air Force within months of each other. I amazed myself at my reaction and all the bitter tears I cried once they had both gone. I actually felt guilty that I had wished so often for the empty nest to actually become a reality.

The good news was that my husband and I had made a point throughout our marriage to nourish our own relationship outside of our kids. I had seen too many times marriages fail once the children left home to make lives for themselves. All too often couples get so involved in the lives of their kids that they never made time for themselves. After the last one leaves the nest they discover they really don’t have anything in common. I was determined that this was not going to happen to us – and it didn’t.

But given all that, I still missed so much about being a family. I missed Christmas morning, I missed birthdays when the first thing I would do was sing Happy Birthday as soon as they got up. I missed the laughter around the dinner table. I missed all the activity of my kids and their friends coming and going. I missed the chaos that only children can contribute to a household. I missed the arguments stemming from chores not being done or bedrooms not being cleaned.

Everything was so quiet and peaceful yet I hated the silence one minute and relished it the next. However, despite this mish mash of feelings and emotions over the departure of my children, in time I began to embrace this new phase of my life. Don’t get me wrong, I will always miss that period when I was raising kids, but I eventually came to cherish this new season and settled most comfortably into just being a couple again.

The memories we made during those years of living as a family are indelibly etched in my mind and sealed upon my heart. I wouldn’t trade that time in my life for anything. But life goes on and then the grandchildren start to arrive. Glimpses of the past chaos make themselves known at new and different family gatherings. And it’s all wonderful. It’s all a nat ural progression of what life is supposed to be. You think you love your kids, but with grandchildren comes another love and an equally important blessing.

Cherished memories are what has gotten me through some rough times. But I have had a life well lived and looking back provides me with a sense of satisfaction within my soul. It may not have always been a perfect life, but it was a good one. As our family grows and changes, we continue to make new memories –and more chaos– and then comes the departure allowing for the welcomed peace and quiet within the walls of my home to settle me back into the calm.

I have been blessed by every phase of my life, but I will admit, I am enjoying this empty nest chapter. There is more ahead for me on this journey of life, and I can’t wait to see where it takes me next.

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