The Gadfly “To persuade and reproach” - Socrates, The Apology
Vol. VII, Iss. IV October 30, 2007
Dispelling the Steubenville Smog We all know it: Steubenville stinks. Literally. Some mornings the very air burns the throat and makes the eyes water and blink. But just how bad is the air pollution in Steubenville? I don’t know about you, dear readers, but this is something I have wondered about quite a bit over the past three years of my attendance at this fine university. What are the health effects of living in such unhealthy smog? Are there any precautions which could be taken? To find out the truth of the matter, I went to talk to Dr. Slater. For those of you who don’t know, Dr. Slater is a professor of chemistry here at the University. Furthermore, he is eminently qualified to speak on air pollution, as he has been collecting air pollution data here on campus for many years and has taught a
course on the subject. Steubenville’s main sources of air pollution are the steel mills and the many surrounding power plants. The fact that we live in a valley doesn’t help, either – a cold front moving in can “cap” the valley, trapping the air pollution along with the warmer air underneath. The air pollution itself is largely made up of particulates, or small particles of various industrial materials (iron oxides, aluminum oxides, etc.) The Federal Health Standards for this sort of thing? 15 micrograms per cubic meter, or lower, is considered safe. Steubenville, Ohio averages 21. The other morning, the readings were at 60. To put this into perspective: in the summers of 1999 and 2000, Harvard came to
Steubenville to collect data for the most comprehensive air pollution study ever done. The city of Steubenville was compared to five other cities around the country, including St. Louis, Missouri and Kingston, Tennessee (both considered “dirty” cities.) Out of all six cities studied, Steubenville was the worst in terms of air pollution. Should this be concerning? We can’t, after all, hold our collective breath for the remainder of our time here on campus. The answer for us students is both yes and no. A lifelong exposure to pollution like this carries an increased risk of both chronic cough and bronchitis. However, these problems result from a cumulative build-up – a four-year exposure as a student probably won’t cause any future problems. For those Continued on page 7
Culture Of Life Week: Beating a Dead Horse? Recently our school was graced by the presence of Star Parker, a nationwide speaker and anti-abortion advocate. If you think back to her visit you will remember that she was one of many speakers during a week dedicated to life awareness. Culture of Life Week was sponsored by Students for Life in order to raise awareness about the issue of abortion and expose our campus to these talented speakers. In addition to spending their own money, the organization requested and received $1000 from FUSA to pay for Star Parker’s honorarium (her stipend) while outside organizations paid for transportation and housing. I am a firm opponent of abortion and an advocate for spreading awareness of this issue, but it is baffling to me that Students for Life went through such great lengths to get one more speaker to our campus. The total support of this issue by our campus is witnessed to by the hundreds of students who travel weekly to Pittsburgh or the multiple hundred who attend the March for Life in Washington D.C. There is possibly no greater point of unity on campus than on the issue of abortion. Why then did we bring in one more speaker when she could have spoken somewhere where her message could have made a greater impact? Perhaps Students for Life is try-
ing to reach the huge minority (perhaps 2%) of the student body who supports abortion secretly in its hearts. If that is the case, I think the environment of the university would have already hardened these students and they would not even attend such events, if they heard about it at all. Perhaps these speakers were brought in for the sake of the local community? This is not the case because advertising was limited to the campus. Perhaps this extra speaker was brought in to impassion those who support the issue but do not do anything about it. This could be a very good thing, but once again, the advertising was too late and too weak to stir this type of person enough to come to a talk. So, what was the result of this week and this particular speaker, Star Parker? Those who care about abortion and already put countless hours into this cause were affirmed. Perhaps a smaller number of lesser supporters were brought by their friends and convicted into action. A lot of very good things were planned and said, but they fell on the ears of those already convinced. Franciscan, I’m glad that the students of Students for Life were willing to put the time and effort into the event for the good of the school, but let me raise two points. First, if FUSA is willing to help fund this, why don’t we introduce issues to campus which are less known or are perhaps more debated? Last year the whole campus was moved by the story of
Francis Bok, a modern day slave from Darfur. Ecumenical speakers or Catholic economic teachers could benefit the entire campus, raising meaningful discussion and allowing students to form holistic and wellfounded opinions. Second, since the issue of abortion is so well understood and supported on our campus, why don’t we use our resources to enter dialogue with other local colleges or the local community? If students began talking with pro-life groups at Pitt, Duquesne, or Carnegie Mellon, they could find a way to bring speakers like Kimberly Hahn and Star Parker to an audience that has never heard this message. If someone approached Catholic organizations in other schools as friends and brothers, not as teachers who have it all together, both parties could grow in faith, knowledge, and solidarity. Even a group of six students who drove into Pittsburgh every week could start something lasting and life-changing. We have a campus full of selfsacrificing, faithful students and a student organization that is willing to do what the students want. The potential here is enormous and it is in your hands. ~MS
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LETTERS TO THE EDITOR
Staff:
Please inform Heather Bartlett how delightful I found her poem. It was full of wit and charm, and it entirely captivated me while meandering from the Book Store to Egan, where boring paper work awaited me. Oh, and I am fully in agreement with her sentiments as set out in her splendid Letter to the Editor. An amazing human being, if she can’t find a husband here then it had better be due to a thousand young men
marching off to join the Trappists. What a great GADFLY you've got going here. Keep the wit and waggery (if not the wine) flowing. Gratefully in Christ, Dr. Regis Martin, S.T.D.
Ubiquitous Bubble-Burster: Mike Andreola (MA) Brian D’Amico (BD)
FUSA Writes In
Emily Davis (ED) Gary Klump (GK)
Dear Gadfly,
Jamie Kropka (JK) Mad Scientist Correspondent: Callie Langworthy (CL) John Mario Levri (JML) Andy Moe (AM) The Goodkind Gnostic: Michael C. Pezzulo (MCP) High Inquisitor: Mark Schreck (MS) Dan Tysz (DT) Business Manager: Sarah Bartley (SB) Layout Editor: Manuel Garcia (MG)
If you really want you readers to know what FUSA is up to, please consider printing this, which might also make up for the weird and unclear cartoon about the emu trainer. Besides, I think I found a sleeping horse: At FUSA’s formal meeting on October 10th, in what was perhaps an attempt to placate a disgruntled student body crying out for a safer campus, Vice President David Schmiesing told FUSA of a new “Student Life Advisory Committee.” “The goal,” he said, “is to provide another means” of communication - both from students to administrators, and vice versa.
Editor in Chief: Cate Shultis (CS)
** Please note that the views held in the articles do not necessarily express the views of the whole staff.
Interested in joining our staff? Email us at notestothegadfly@gmail.com
~Mission Statement~ The Gadfly is an attempt to “bite the sleeping horse” in the spirit of Socrates. It is a student publication whose purpose is to facilitate discussion concerning campus and cultural issues as they pertain to students of Franciscan University. It aims to be a forum for open, well-thought out, and honest discussion towards the end of knowing and loving truth in its most robust sense.
Advisor: Dr. John White Advisor Extraordinaire
While this development might appear to answer FUSA’s call for a student group to work directly with Jefferson Security, it does not. Quite frankly, the new advisory committee is something altogether separate, and really seems superfluous, since FUSA is already fills the role of “students advising administrators, and viceversa.” Unless another solution is offered to foster direct communication between Jefferson Security and the Student Body, FUSA's solution ought to be implemented. No amount of superfluous committee-forming will make our campus any safer. When it comes to campus and student security, Student Life is an unwieldy organization which has proven itself to be a hindrance in certain ways. FUSA’s proposed group would work directly with Jefferson Security, and would bypass Student Life in these respects. It seems fine that Student Life should set contract and policy with Jefferson, but there also needs to be a direct line of communication between Jefferson and the student body. Why is it that “Student Life is not,” as Schmiesing said, “prepared to engage,” in the way FUSA has advised?
Gadfly Factoid: What is the Student Life Advisory Committee? The purpose of the Student Life Advisory Committee is to provide an opportunity for broad student input to the Vice President of Student Life regarding issues affecting students at Franciscan University, and to provide the Vice President of Student Life with another means of communicating information to the student body. Currently, it consists of 17 student leaders, including seven FUSA officers and senators. Perhaps it is because, as Schmiesing further commented, that Student life doesn’t want to set up an organization that “results in frustration and no results.” Ok. This is certainly a situation well avoided, but the avoidance plan related by Schmiesing, to have no organization at all, is ridiculous. My solution? FUSA’s solution? Set up an organization that doesn’t “result in frustration and no results;” set up an organization that results in positive change! Student security is nothing to be taken lightly. FUSA did not simply ask for a student organization to foster higher quality Frosted Flakes in the Cafe. Such an issue would deserve to be shrugged off and dodged in the manner that this request has been dealt with. This is the kind of issue for which you re-think resources and come up with the ability to foster such a group. The current system has already grievously failed the students once, by not alerting students to a serious and clearly present danger - until it was useless, too late, and the danger had almost passed. Please, administration, take FUSA’s request seriously, and thereby do not fail your students again. Kevin J. Mohan P.R. Liason, FUSA
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St. Paul, patron saint of journalists and newspaper staffs, pray for us.
LETTERS TO THE EDITOR Dear Gadfly and its many respected writers, In the spirit of Procrastination, it is my pleasure to submit this editorial an issue late. The issue I am referring to is The Gadfly Vol. VII, Issue II which was published October 2, 2007 and is entitled “To Be Or Not To Be…Pro-Life”. There are several clarifications I would like to make about the events that took place in that class, I was actually there, as well as some criticisms as to the language of the article published. Also I would like to articulate some of my own thoughts and opinions regarding the pro-life movement in general. So let me begin with the clarifications. When I speak of clarifications I am referring to things inaccurately represented in the article which Randall Terry explicitly did not say or did imply in his presentation. First, Randall never said and never implied for pro-lifers to “take up arms”. I understand this term “taking up arms” can often times seem trivial and is often not used to mean its literal meaning; yet to publish such a statement can very often be misconstrued and can present an assumption which in Randall in no way implied. Next, Randall never called mothers who have abortions murderers and never demanded “we tell them so”. Throughout his presentation he did argue that we ought to speak the truth of the matter to both mothers and abortion doctors that innocent babies are being killed. This, however, does not necessarily translate to calling mothers murderers. Randall also never said that if we “weren’t willing to get arrested, then we weren’t really pro-life”. In his presentation, Randall made the analogy of the pro-life movement to war, and in many ways it is a war. He said there are many different roles of the soldiers in the war. He made the distinction between soldiers, generals, and medics. Although Randall’s main goal of the pro-life movement was in fact that the law be changed, he never said it was the only goal. Back to the analogy, Randall described the sidewalk counselors as medics and even though medics have an essential role in the pro-life movement, they by no means should take the role of the general and lead the army against the war on abortion. As to why the law being change is the most important goal of the pro-life move-
ment, Randall used the immoral and unjust law of slavery. It made a huge difference to the slaves once slavery was abolished and even though the hearts of the slave owners were not necessarily changed, the law made it illegal to own a slave and thus the slaves were in fact free regardless of the slave owners’ motives. If a slave owner wanted to still exploit slaves after its abolishment, he could be punished because of the law and also the slaves now had rights, the right to freedom. This same analysis can be juxtaposed to the legal slavery of child killing. Unborn babies are in desperate need of freedom, the freedom to life, and regardless of what either side argues, it is undisputable that changing the law will have a tremendous impact in regards to abortion, even if the cultural still remains vastly secular in its views regarding life. Even though abortion probably would still exist if Roe vs. Wade would be overturned, the deterrence of the law would have a significant effect since abortion would no longer be categorized as a medical alternative but rather as an illegal action. Anyways, going back to the article, the article stated that the main goal is to “change the law, by any means necessary.” By throwing in “by any means necessary”, the article went a bit too far. Randall is in favor of civil disobedience and believes that social tension is an inevitable means to social change. However, he did not proclaim, at least at this time, for pro-lifers to rise against the government using any means. In my humble opinion I think both facets of the pro-life movement, the changing of the hearts of the culture (sidewalk counseling, AIM pregnancy centers, etc) and the direct attack against the unjust laws proclaimed by our government by civil disobedience (protest, boycott, frequent annoyance of public officials to change laws, etc.) are both crucial to the advancement of the pro-life cause. Instead of bickering and fighting against one another, if the pro-life movement would unite, how much more momentum would the dignity of life gain both in our culture and in our legal system.
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QUO VADIS? Why do people get drunk? This question has been bothering me since, oh, my freshman year of high school, and I think it’s about time that I find an answer for it. Of course, there are as many answers to that question as there are drunks, but it seems like there may be something of a common root. I am going to propose that the common root is the desire to be, for a little while, something different. Three scenarios of drunkenness have presented themselves to me in the past year or so: young people getting drunk in bars, young people getting drunk at home, and middle-aged and older people getting drunk.
BOTTOMS UP!
least he has fun as his aim, but then comes the question – what is so fun, so glamorous, about ending your night vomiting into the toilet while your host mother shouts at you in Spanish? Wouldn’t, perhaps, a nice game of cards provide equivalent entertainment? Why alcohol? It’s not even a novelty here, and it’s certainly not a way to experience the culture, or be “more Spanish.” My host sister, for example, simply exclaims, “Es patético! Patético!” when speaking of drunks. So wherein lies the allure? It seems like the only explanation is that alcohol provides a temporary escape from life, a chance to be something other than what you are.
I’ll start with my current peer group – the (American) students I study with here in Spain. They do seem to get drunk an awful lot, and I started listening to what they were saying about any reasoning behind such activities. One girl simply said, “Getting drunk is all we have left.” What? I asked her to explain, and she said that she is so frustrated by the difficulties that she has in her classes that she gets drunk to forget her worries.
I will now move to my peers back in the states: those who drink mostly in project houses or slummy apartments. And I’ll admit, I am stumped: though many have tried to explain it to me, I have no idea wherein lies the attraction of getting drunk, making poor decisions, and slogging yourself home to the dorm. Maybe it’s a way to be counter-cultural, but I must say, it is a fairly uncreative way to be different. Learn to play the accordion or something – it’s at least a conversation piece.
Other people have insinuated that they think they are more attractive when they are belligerently drunk. This leads me to think that maybe alcohol was not the only drug they were abusing…but that’s beside the point. Another guy in our group said that he’s “not going to go out and not get drunk, because that would be boring.” All right, at
Some people have told me that they drink to loosen up a little, just to feel more comfortable in conversation. That’s all well and good, but then I have to wonder – what happens in the real world, when you have to be amicable and social sans alcohol? Maybe you were the life of the party back in the projects, but the odds are good that
whatever social skills you pick up there won’t be remembered the next day and probably can’t be used outside that social context anyway. And really, drinking to “loosen up” seems like just another way to flee life, and pretend that you are someone else. That being said, I’d like to comment on the future of young drunks: old drunks. This past summer, I worked among a fairly blue-collar population. Most of them would talk, in all seriousness, about getting drunk after work, and how they “get drunk to forget” and drink to get “comfortably numb.” What are they trying to forget? That they work at a thankless job, earning just enough money to get by? Are they trying to forget the lives they might have had had they done things differently? Regardless, they are drinking because they are not happy because of where they are in life. They want to be something else, someone else, somewhere else. Sound familiar? So maybe this is just an embittered rant because I don’t enjoy being intoxicated. Prove me wrong, and come up with another reason to drink. You don’t even have to send your answers to notestothegadfly@gmail.com, either (though you certainly may) – just live them. The odds are good that you will be who you are the rest of your life, so now is a good time to get comfortable with that reality. Man, this is a heavy topic! I’m going to go have a beer. ~ED
A Hopefully Enlightening Inquiry for All Those Concerned About America: Part Two As you may know, my first article in this series was a short summary of the merits of Senator Brownback as opposed to the other Republican candidates. Unfortunately, life has thrown me yet another speed bump. The jolly Senator has indeed dropped out of the race as of 10/19, as I’m sure you all know. I am beside myself with grief. Beside myself. (Are you noting the irony?) But, I digress. The main point I am trying to get to here is my firm belief that Ron Paul is the best choice for Amer-
ica, and I also think that he is the best option for all you former Brownback supporters. Perhaps we’ll throw in a Mike Huckabee as veep for good measure. But, in true Levar Burton style, don’t take my word for it. Listen to the knowledgeable words of actual, real-life Franciscan students who worked for the actual, real-life Brownback campaign over the actual, real-life summer: One of the questions I asked my interviewees was what they thought of Ron Paul and his beliefs, so I’ll concentrate on these answers instead of my original ques-
tion, “Why Brownback?” I think that one is a little useless at this point. Anyway, I’ll start with Mike Moehlenhof, a senior from Indiana and the Vice-President of FUSA. Mike agrees with Ron Paul on economic issues, such as social welfare, the IRS, and Social Security. And it certainly doesn’t hurt that Ron Paul is pro-life. However, he disagrees with his isolationist foreign policy, stating that “isolationism is asking for another 9/11.” Mike believes that “we should leave Iraq a stable country as best as Continued on page 6
St. Pancras, protector from perjury, pray for us.
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The Sleeping Horse: All The Cool Kids Are Doing It Stereotypes are nasty. Why? Most of the time there is some truth to them and the individual being stereotyped sometimes believes what others categorize him as. Therefore, any stereotypes having to do with households are important to discuss because we wouldn’t want this nastiness to pervade some of our most valued communities on campus. I have witnessed stereotypes affect household members. For example, it seems to me like there are certain individuals who join a household not so much for the covenant or charism as for the social status the household has. It reminds me a lot of middle school when people would act nicely towards certain people to “get in” with them so they could be part of the “cool crowd.” And it seems that once they are in certain households, individuals think they’re somehow cooler than they were before. It is sad that someone could think joining a certain club or community makes him worth more than he was before joining. Obviously, the stereotype I’m referring to is that some households are considered more popular or groovier than others. I am willing to say that all households are mainly about the covenant and a prayerful community, but I do think that some households have this extra feature. Being too cool is probably the best stereotype to have; it could be a lot
worse: people could not want to join a household due to a stereotype. Let us take the Prods for an example. I have heard too many times that the Prods drink too much, they’re too wild, the whole household goes to AA meetings for Lord’s Day, and the like. This needs to stop. I think the Prods should be the prototype for all households on campus. They seem to have the least petty nonsense among their members. They are real people. They love being Catholic. They don’t feel pressured into commitments; they genuinely want to go. Of course, my opinion is from an outside perspective and maybe someone from the Prods will e-mail me writing, “We drink too much, we are very petty, and none of us really like this household.” But I would be shocked. And it would be a shame if someone did not check out the Prods due to rumors that they’re too wild. In conclusion, I’ve witnessed stereotypes that affect male households in both ways: some stereotypes of a household make a student want to check out that household and other stereotypes make students not want to check out a household. Either way, they exist, are more prevalent than most people realize, and are detrimental to our unique spiritual communities. I encourage you all to step outside the household life, look at your household as an outsider would see it, and try and get rid of the petty aspect of a stereotype, but don’t lose
your identity. Each household is different and has an identity, and this is good. But when a student looks at this identity as a way of enhancing or potentially damaging his social status, the identity has become more of a focus than the spiritual community. Send accolades, diatribes, and equivocations to: notestothegadfly@gmail.com. Next issue will be the last household article for the semester. I’m going to summarize all the ways we should have grown and any concerns you have for me, as well as all reader submissions in response to this series. Peace and all good, as always,
~JML
Outside the Bubble Food Issues Around the World
Rome, Italy: The UN Food and Agriculture Organization hosted the World Food Day 2007 commemoration October 16th in the heart of one of the most prestigious culinary capitals of the world. Prominent speakers such as Dr. Jacques Diouf, director-general of the FAO, and Tanzanian President Jakaya Mrisho Kikwete sought to raise awareness of estimated 854 million people who suffer from chronic hunger in the world today. President Kikwete noted that poor nutrition
is the root cause of death for 40,000 children around the globe each day. Kiwete and the FAO agree that the best hope in dramatically reducing these numbers is to invest in agriculture on the African continent. Pope Benedict XVI reiterated at the ceremony that food is a human right, and to deprive individuals from it when the capability exists to offer it to them is a violation against human dignity.
Mogadishu, Somalia: A United Nations compound was breached by government forces in Somalia last week taking prisoner the UN official supervising emergency food relief in the ravished capital. Food distribution has ceased as a result. Idris Osman is thought to be held captive somewhere near the presidential palace. The Somali government denies ever having set foot in the UN compound but pointed out that the World Food Program was Continued on page 6
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THE GNOSTIC SPEAKS: Praise God and Pass the Nietzsche, Part II As you loyal Gadfly readers will recall, last issue this column entered a discussion concerning intellectual openness. The view was suggested that theology (if understood as a speculative discipline) is a call to explore and develop doctrine. Our consideration now moves to the intellectual engagement that takes place in theology and other disciplines. In short, we are considering the intellectual mindset of a “dynamically orthodox” thinker. As the nature of orthodoxy is not our topic, I will advance a few basic assumptions that hopefully will not inspire much debate. For purposes of this discussion, an orthodox mindset, whatever else it is or does, accepts as true that God has revealed himself in Jesus Christ. Further, this view grants that Christ established a Church that teaches with authority and that her teaching is Christ’s. On the basis of this teaching authority she can evaluate and comment on all spheres of human activity, insofar as they are affected by Christ’s teaching. Thus the Church’s authority is definitive for theology. Any conclusion of a local theologian is subject to review and correction from the universal Church (mandatum, anyone?). She is infallible. But in-fallibility is negative; by definition it prevents error. Avoiding error is perhaps sufficient for personal formation and providing basic instruction, but it would seem that a theologian who seeks to make a positive contribution wishes “Outside the Bubble... ” continued from page 5
guilty of distributing food without receiving government permission. Naypyidaw, Burma: The World Food Program alarmingly reported last week that more than five million Burmese citizens are “A Hopefully Enlightening...” continued from page 4
possible and as quick as possible.” Lauren Pettit, a sophomore from Connecticut and the President of FUSA, told me that she originally supported Brownback because “always my first priority has been moral issues.” She did not specifically comment on Ron Paul’s policies, but instead commented on the enthusiasm of his supporters. Finally, senior Elizabeth Martin spoke a little more about her work experi-
to do more. Firstly, the grace and call of God are needed. As a discussion of these is beyond the scope of a philosophic column, we will turn now to what a would-be theologian needs that other scholars also need. I advance as self-evident that indispensable for scholars is humility. I may have been around for only 24.5 years, but it is clear to me that everyone makes mistakes sometimes (even a gnostic like me!). For scholars this means – probably not everything I think is correct! My mother, the Church, is infallible, but not me! Of course theologians have the vast resources of scripture and tradition to rely on for guidance. But other fields also have their histories. Yes, regrettable as it may be that I as a scholar am not the sole or even primary font of insight, I have a whole mess of predecessors who just may have been smarter than I am. I have to actually do the work of not only reading them, but doing my best to understand what they said and why they said it. But not even this exhausts the burden we scholars carry for that taskmistress intellectual humility! We have teachers. These intelligent and trained professionals in their respective fields have been at this longer than we have. If one of them say something I don’t like, I am bound as a scholar to seriously consider it anyway (not, say, to go run and tell my friends how stupid, evil or heretical my professor is). If I disagree, I should facing a desperate food shortage. The WFP had enough to serve only 500,000. After a visit last week, WFP regional Director for Asia said, “Humanitarian organizations can help, but we are faced with insufficient funding, and whatever we manage to acence with the campaign than the others did, which was very revealing. According to Martin, “we [the people of the campaign] were being pro-life to the unborn, but not pro-life to the people around us.” She tells the story of a group of inexperienced campaign workers who had little respect for the opposition and extremely closed minds. However, fortunately for Martin herself, she has since recovered. When asked about Ron Paul, she gave a very diplomatic answer about him being a possibly good
have a reason to do so. It may even be that I (gasp) am wrong. The same applies to those I read: I should assume they are intelligent until they prove otherwise and try my hardest to understand them before I assume they are unclear. Golly Gee! This applies in conversation with friends and classmates too! I might have to actually listen carefully and think about what they say, before replying to and/or dismissing their views. Imaginethey might be right too! This whole academic thing is not entirely, or even primarily, all about me! Having just exhausted the available supply of first person singular pronouns (not to mention exceeded this column’s semesterly quota of exclamations) we will consider this point made and move on. (Why the first person, you ask; furthermore, why have I written about intellectual pride instead of my topic of intellectual humility? Because like St. Bernard, I choose to write of what I know from experience and leave my reader to determine its opposite.) But wait! We have omitted the esteemed Herr Nietzsche. But we have also exceeded our space. Our most benevolent forbearer Nietzsche shall have to be considered in the third and final segment. Until then, I remain knowingly yours, ~The Goodkind Gnostic
complish in the current circumstances will only scratch the surface.” ~BD
choice, but I just looked on her Facebook, where it indeed shows that she supports Ron Paul. I knew she would come to our side eventually. In summary, vote Ron Paul 08 .
~MA
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St. Thomas Aquinas, patron saint of universities, pray for us.
COMIC CORNER
~AM
The Quest of the Hoi Polloi
“Dispelling the Steubenville Smog”
continued from page 1
with heart problems, though, the effects could be both immediate and deadly. The Harvard “Six City Study” mentioned above found that air pollution, and specifically high particulate levels, causes instantaneous elevated heart arrhythmias (an irregular heart beat). Arrhythmias have long been directly linked to heart attacks. Again, fellow students, we are largely young and healthy. Arrhythmias won’t be a problem for us, and we won’t be living here long enough to be at risk for some of the long term concerns. Have you
ever heard the phrase “jogging in Steubenville fog is like chain-smoking a pack of cigarettes”? This is greatly exaggerated – smoking will always be much worse for your body than any Steubenville fog, though jogging when it’s smoggy could possibly be equated to exposure to second-hand smoke. If you are going to jog around campus, the best time, according to Dr. Slater, is middle afternoon. Early morning, as we all know, is the worst time. So, the bad news is that we do live in an area of extremely high air pollution. The good news is that we are mostly young
and healthy. I, for one, am happy to know that I will be taking memories away from Franciscan University – and not bronchitis. I hope this article has served to shed a little light through the Steubenville fog and dispel some of the rumors. God bless and breathe easy. ~CL
j|Çx? j|à? tÇw jtzzxÜç All Hallows Eve Foolishness Hello everyone, It’s that time of year again. The leaves are turning, the air is getting a bit colder, and there is a slight hint of death on the wind. It must be time for Halloween. In the spirit of this great Pagan turned Christian turned secular holiday, we asked our professors: “What would you dress up as?” Here are their replies: Dr. Perozich, Biology - E. Coli
Actual size of one bacterium of E. Coli
Dr. Slater, Chemistry - a mad scientist with safety goggles. (Because he’s not so mad as to not wear safety goggles.)
Dr. Lewis, English - Louis Quatorze (XIV), le Roi Soleil (the Sun King) Dr. Klapakova, Spanish Snow White
Dr. Smith, Classics -Tinkerbell
Dr. Hildebrand, Theology - St. Maximus the Confessor
We then voted who we would most like to see dressed up in his/her proposed costume and Dr. Smith won. In recognition of his choice in costume, the Gadfly will be presenting him with his very own Tinkerbell wand. Happy Halloween!
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