Quench - Issue 108 by Cardiff Student Media

VOYEUR...4 FEATURES...6 FOOD... 11 BOOKS...15 FASHION...18 Travel...26 PHOTOS...29 LGBT+...32 ARTS...34 MUSIC...38 Film...46

VOYEUR

Issue 108 April 11

WORTH A TRY! I do not care for the Royal Family, the up coming wedding merely holding a confusing self undeniably intrigued by the dress dull Kate chooses to wear, and anger at the prospect of its price tag at our expense. I do however love bunting. Sandwiches with crusts cut off. And the idea of young children running around gaily, complete with massive protective parents have allowed them to play outside on the street with little Jack and Silly from number 32. Basically, I like street parties. The idea of having one is hugely appealing, in my head the event morphing into the perfect advert for community spirit - a hovis ad, with a lovely helping of United Colours of Benneton universality. Annoyingly, Kate right in the middle of Easter holidays, and right before exams. No street party for me. No community spirit. And I will bet a lot of money her dress can be described along the vein of "classic, simply and overpriced." Aka

I studied Illustration in Southampton Solent University and have been based in Cardiff for the last couple of years, building up my graphic portfolio with gig and band posters. I'm inspired by movement and texture, so my portfolio is also quite heavily themed with drawings of birds and trees. I'm hugely can folk art. I work both on location and in my studio, usually using Indian ink and acrylic. Lucy Bur ns kindly illustrated this amazing Royal Wedding themed cover. If you wish to get in touch with Lucy please do so via quench@gairrhydd.com

it seemed too bigger event to simply let pass with our Royal Wedding Special! Easter is around the corner, so I wish to hit you with a little bit of sentimental drivel before you all run off and consume too much chocolate. The end is nigh. Today I had my last ever university lecture. I only just realised as such. As an event it passed me by, as so many things do, in a blur of stress and hunger. By the time I had gobbled down a panini and reassured myself that time was on my side, and that yes of course I would get everything done, I looked back and realised that this momentous occasion was momentous in no way whatsoever. It had felt like every other lecture, but yet it will always be my last. Frustratingly, it wasn't even a very good one, so I can't say it ended on a high. I will not allow this to be the case for my university life more generally. One more term of university ever for me, and the same is true for a lot of you out there. Do not let it pass in a blur of stress and hunger, but rather appreciate it as the end of something great, and the hugely scary transition period into the big bad world. End on a high.

Dom Kehat

vouyer@gairrhydd.com

Quench Quickie The Royal Wedding is the bookies dream. Here are the Odds, get those bets in fast! The Length of Kate's Train Less than 2 metres 6/4 2.01 to 5 metres 5/4 5.01 to 8 metres 4/1 More than 8 metres 8/1 The Birth of the next King/Queen (urgggh!) 2012 13/8 2013 7/4 2014 5/1 2015 6/1 2016 or later 4/1 Royal Wedding CD to reach No. 1 in Album Chart 2/1 Yes

VOYEUR

y r a n o i t c i D e n a Urb

Stuckism (noun)

nd is a paradoxically bla n Mozart, Stuckism tha r he eed rat ind t m bu ine 99) Em red on Inception, (19 For those of you rea tive in ter ms of its art. For ent, in that it's for ma vem ditional concept of mo g tra a itin on exc t d en an ist ins s, air ch e from arm cam ed in fusty te that the word its ideas seem foster etic fallacys, then no gen l ica stuck'. , log ck mo stu , ety ck to e rn ing style was 'stu those of you more bo p that his traditional paint cu BF tea ex ow r all he sh d tol yet o ted floridly decora Tracey Emin, wh the in rm level sto a the d en ate Giv ally cre itish art world. Stuckist's have gradu imthat post-moder n) Br an is is (or s n thi , der art Mo g sin the th the press dicus they believe to be wi d ate , oci art l ass tua lly cep ngs typica that moder n con of portensious gawbli tly, their insistence ish en wn rec r clo s he res rat t cyd bu , ng e, and fan mediatedly good thi inters at a disadvantag hment. or representative pa ch of the art establis mu th wi s ad has placed figurative he ger log at d I'm m an the s t les pu art ze er pri ow, inauthentic, he mocking of the Turn g other things; shall I feel I . on ion am ess is, rec art l the tua for ull They argue concep en Hirst's Diamond Sk ir ideas, Stuckist blame Dami og if I concur with the pd La n nia pretty sure I heard a joh tle Lit a ng wearbei I'm of nk on thi ati us bly acc tweed you proba continue to risk the skin tur ning into the e tir en my of k ris but sadly, at the dualistic have a ruddy point. a continuation of the ing, I think they may usly close to fostering ll (as I ero we ng y da ma m it see ci, s ist Vin While the Stuck to Picasso or Da in Em y ace pleasTr d g an l rin ple compa a more fruitfu fuckwhittery of peo n meager pleasure) be ow t as r bu you re, for r the ho ng tap rdi me tunnel (dodgy wo continue my clumsy porary we even in a fucking e tem Ar con ce. in en in) eri it exp ve to urable tunnel worse nature will lea ving you laughed at, my d for their lacking of it may be the only thi be insistently mocke to m ty to see ive s na ina ne ret sti my illi rt Ph sta d the British art? For a room is angry they ha to be seum light, as if the Also, the tunnel seems is. l ne tun the sion by a scalding mu at wh nd use sta exc der w un No r . ce' eve pie uld , but a 'performance all presume to think I wo at l ne tun out a be ow t that it may no ist's want to thr ironically supposing d neither do the Stuck an , n't do do y I d the t an r, Bu ho in. metap moder nist shit my lazily constructed ch ter than it did a postMu . wa th art y ba rar the po th tem wi icism of much con the Moder nist baby cyn the t at ou ab gre w int ho po d t prescien ness'. You rea have an unnervingly its own shallow 'clever it, on t ou ise ab pra d ve rea pti n't -em did pre lf you of it seeks to lavish ge to convince yourse ion beyou just about mana hting of the transact lig gh 'hi the t a bed in a museum is, ou ab ty gh mi d histry an sop h e hig rat po all ling this kind of cor and you walk out fee Not current painters, it's te. for eli ly all sad sm ll a We de r'. tsi we tween art and vie t alienate people ou bu ng the thi no ps ha es do per t it elf, and n art is bad, bu which mocks art its y, n and even post-moder wr der Lo d mo an all t con no Ba d an of fact that the land the all galleries are elite, up e ak sh to eds itish art ne Stuckists are what Br little heed to paint. s pay sh Na d an Turner

FEATURES

THE ROYAL WEDDING

With the 'biggest wedding of the century' dominating ever more tabloid inches, the Features team investigate.

quenchfeatures@gairrhydd.com

FEATURES

A Word of Advice Failing to be swept up in the patriotic furore, Jack Doran instructs the future monarchs on how to spice up their wedding plans.

Whether you are a staunch monarchist, drinking breakfast tea from your ‘Kate and Wills’ mug, or a raging anarchist with Sex Pistols blaring from the headphones, one thing is for sure: you will not be able to escape the claws of the Royal Wedding. With all the hype, the exclusives, the revelation of intricate details, I can’t help but feeling I really, really don’t give a shit. The news of the engagement splashed across the headlines with incredible vigour back in November. It is at this point that I ask you to take an alternative readthat a couple were to get married, a couple of state-sponging Londoners whom we have never met. And guess what, despite knowing the colhotel room in which they will royally bang, they have no intention of inviting us whatsoever. I wouldn’t go as far as to say I’m antimonarchy, it’s just I am honestly struggling to care. It could be Alan and Charlene of Bognor Regis getting married in Butlins and I wouldn’t feel any greater amount of fervour. Sorry Wills. Sorry Kate. So, whilst I could have sat on my laurels, spewing forth bile, I have instead come up with a few ideas for the happy couple that could inspire a greater level of interest from the apathetic amongst us. A lesson could be learnt from out brothers and sisters in the Khevsureti region of Georgia, as their pre-wedding rituals really might inject a bit of life into the proceedings. They practise a symbolic rite of bride abduction, whereby the groom arrives at the home of his wife-to-be during a time of feasting. She feigns resistance as he takes her captive, to be imprisoned in the

for Hello! dation in the following 120 hours. The next big issue to tackle is the location. Thankfully, this indulgent ramble of an article has allowed me to do a lot of web research and I have duly shortlisted some interesting alternatives to the altar. For example, what about getting hitched underwater (China), in McDonald’s (Hong Kong), at a funeral home (USA), in a phone booth (Norway) or on a plane (USA) etc etc. I could go on. Sort it out, Windsors, the world is your oyster. Whilst the details of the honeymoon are being kept far from public view, I feel I may have a chance to intervene with a few suggestions of my own. Here’s hoping Big Willy is reading. So, Hooray! There’s always talk of ‘once-in-a-lifetime’ experiences and ‘memories you’ll never forget’; well Libya has it all! Who needs sun loungers or national parks when you could be on the front line of a bloody revolution. If that’s not going to cut it, I wonder if the pair have considered the beautiful isle of Japan? There’s nothing worse than being bored on holiday, so I’m suggesting to get right in there, Fukushima must be the one. There are endless amounts of outdoor activities to keep our freshly-married prince and princess occupied. Read on for more incredible insight and exclusive news on the big day. On the following page Jenny Pearce investigates the breadth and depth of tripe and shite you can buy in the name of this holy congregation. As the TV schedules take a break from their usual programming, Claire Dibben explains the rules of way to get you through what will undoubtedly be hours and hours of footage of absolutely

big day. I can see it now, the abduction televised on 24 hour news channels with exclusive access

quenchfeatures@gairrhydd.com

FEATURES

THE ROYAL WEDDING

1. If

DRINKING GAME

the Queen is on the screen you must be drinking. The woman has ruled the country for over 50 years; the least you can do is get royally wrecked in her honour.

2. Any time Prince Harry appears, all players must produce a Nazi salute. The last player to do so must consume 5 mouthfuls for their tardy antics. 3. If Elton John is spotted, the last person to shout "Candle in the Wind" must drink. 4. You must drink every time comparisons are made to Diana and Charles' Big Day or any other previous Royal Wedding.

5.In the name of ruddy-cheeked, bacon-gobbling Britishness, every rendition of the National Anthem must be accompanied by a hearty and patriotic chug from your drinking vessel (preferably a Toby jug). Needless to say, you must stand up as well. 6. player, to ensure the cup has a good mix of drinks.

7. Following on from Rule 6, The last person to shout "God save the future King!" upon the proclamation of "I now pronounce you man and wife" has to down the Future King's Cup. 8. Our favourite racist Grandad, Prince Phillip, has found a warm place in many of our hearts. Accordingly, whenever he is shown independent of the Queen (to avoid complicaties can be dealt to anyone who makes no attempt to imitate his accent. 9. disparage him in a torrent of witty expletives is allowed to come up with a rule of their own. Why not enjoy a bit of anarchy from the comfort of your sofa!

quenchfeatures@gairrhydd.com

SILLY SOUVENIRS The Royal Wedding is a lucrative business, with all sorts of companies jumping on the souvenir bandwagon. Jenny Pearce goes window shopping for the best of the (very bad) bunch.

fuss being made over the wedding du jour a tad nauseating. Luckily for those people there is now a sick bag commemorating the special day. Not the most romantic souvenir, but at least you can feel that little bit more classy whilst emptying your stom ach.

plastered across the front. Not to eve

ard fridges. Cool.

picture of the wrong prince, Prince Harry. What could be better than sip ping a nice cuppa out of a mug that is adorned with this massive faux pas.

quenchfeatures@gairrhydd.com

FOOD

The good people at Las Iguanas contacted Quench last week, imploring us to attend the opening of reluctant because the Bay can be a hassle to get to and I have never held chain restaurants that claim to offer an ‘authentic’ taste of Latin America in particularly high regard (e.g. the greasesoaked, jalapeño-jammed shack of cheese that is Chiquitos). However, I then discovered that the evening would involve bringing a friend, eating for free and taking an almost vulgar approach to the open bar. ‘Sounds promising’, I thought. So, last Friday, I brought my friend Mel (a lady with a particularly discerning palette and thirst for liquor) along with me to enjoy the evening. This opening was a big deal for Las Iguanas; not ment to put their service skills to the test, but it was also an opportunity to gauge customer reaction to the entirely revitalized menu. The menu, however, is not the only part of Las Iguanas to have undergone an overhaul. Las Iguanas have also rebranded themselves with some sleek new signage and a décor scheme that strikes a happy balance between equatorial hippy-club and Seattle coffee shop (think Starbucks with gratuitous amounts of Bamboo and an atmospheric Salsa soundtrack). When we weren’t sinking the free Caipirnha cocktails, we were having various miniatures from the menu thrust into our hands. The lamb empanadas, a crispy pastry dish with braised lamb and smoked chilies, were rich and tasty, as were the Pato Taquito, which comprised of chilijam, roast duck and plenty of garlic. Unfortunately, their Calamari left a lot to be desired. It was far too greasy and the aioli sauce that accompanied it was in short supply. All in all, Las Iguanas offers a variety of Latin American inspired food in a warm and cosy setting. It is the perfect place to head for dinner with a view, and has ample bar space to hang around for some stiff post-dinner drinks. A word of warning though, with starters ranging between £5 and £7 and mains costing up to £15, this is not, perhaps, the most student-friendly eatery around. But ideal if the parents are visiting and fancy footing the bill!! Gavin Jewkes

Competition ! Prize: a voucher for a meal for two people to the value of £50 to be used at Cardiff's newest Las Iguanas before 30 June 2011 Q: Where in Cardiff is the new Las Iguanas located? Please send your answers to food@ gairrydd.com before 15th April 2011. A winner will be picked at random. food@gairrhydd.com

Dancing in the Street ? Will you be hanging bunting or a Royal Wedding...

It has recently been disclosed that only one in three councils have received a single application to host a street party in celebration of the nuptials of Prince William and Kate Middleton. It seems the ever so quintessentially British tradition of gathering up your neighbours, some of your best garden furniture and anything red, white or blue to mark a royal occasion is slowly, but surely, waning. Back in the day when community spirit guided people through the smog of working life and wartime

Hovis advert â&#x20AC;&#x201C; the boy, loaf in hand, running through the festivities taken aback by the camaraderie, the

of number ten with paper plates and plastic cutlery. A royal success! matter. There are so many awful things happening in the world all the time - surely on the rare occasion we have something to celebrate we can open our doors, get together on the street and celebrate in style Anouska Moller-Butcher

food@gairrhydd.com

FOOD

Wills and Kate have sent out their invites and I seem, perhaps unsurprisingly, to have been overlooked. I wondered if I might have been privy to an invite, care of Sam-Cam, to the Downing Street street party hosted by her and our spoon-faced PM in celebration of the nuptials of our future King and Queen. However, it seems that I’m not welcome in SW1A either. I had not adequately prepared myself for this series of rejection. Thus, I have been forced into a state of panic about what avenues to consider for the ‘big day’ on 29th April. Now that I know I won’t be toasting with Chaz and Camilla at Buckingham Palace or hanging bunting from the sash-windows of No. 10, I feel less inclined to celebrate and in favour of an altogether more negative approach. Thankfully, the Internet is awash with shouty anarchist types who have nothing better to do than churn out acidic missives explaining how and why we should force the blue-blooded out of their golden cage and set them loose among us common folk. Furthermore, the general consensus of the growing number of anti-monarchists in Britain suggests that the public should rally together in opposition to this month’s forthcoming Royal Wedding. So, if I’m not going to a street party to have a cream-tea supper

with the neighbours (or Dave and Sam), or watching on a big screen as the royal carriage bobs its way down the Mall, then perhaps I should indulge in any number of anti-wedding activities being promoted online? Whilst I can’t say I particularly relish the thought of a ‘Fuck the Royals’ punk gig in Bristol, nor the idea of staying inside and downloading multiple copies of the Sex Pistols ‘God Save the Queen’ on iTunes, I am somewhat taken by the offer of a 5-day retreat at a campsite in Machynlleth that is touting itself as ‘the ultimate getaway and distraction from the mayhem of the royal wedding’. Out with Gavin Jewkes

food@gairrhydd.com

Fancy Food Speculation is rife about all elements of the upcoming Royal wedding. Jasmine Joynson and Melissa Parry take a look at what other famous couples have served up on their big days.

Jay Z & Beyonce

Brand Beckham

One way of keeping your wedding simple and frugal is by providing your own food. If you happen to have a really good cook in the family then even better! Beyonce and Jay Z reportedly cooked their own food for their wedding, with Beyonce supplying Creole dishes and Jay Z’s grandmother cooking oxtail soup. Well, if Beyonce can do it...

The Beckhams' wedding seemed to be an all round British affair. For the starter guests were served baby tomato and red pepper soup, followed by the main meal of roast potatoes with corn fed chicken. Dessert was sticky toffee pudding for the boys and pink champagne jelly with summer berries for the girls. Although dessert sexism seems to be an issue here the menu actually sounds delicious.

Charles & Di Prince Wills Apparently Prince William has requested that one of the royal wedding cakes be made out of rich tea biscuits, condensed milk and dried fruit. It is set in the freezer rather than baked in the oven and was his favourite treat as a child. Aw, bless!

At Prince Charles and Lady Diana's wedding luncheon 120 guests were served brill in lobster sauce, chicken breasts stuffed with lamb mousse, and strawberries with Cornish cream. The royal couple had 27 cake made by the Naval Armed Forces. The ceremonial sword, featured the prince’s coat of arms, Diana’s family crest, an ornamental “C” and “D”, and was topped with roses, lilies of the valley, and orchids. So it was a low key affair, then...

Mini Clinton Chelsea Clinton (former US President Bill Clinton’s daughter) had a wedding menu consisting of mainly vegan and vegetarian food, with meat eating guests given the option of corn fed organic beef. There was also a vegan and gluten free wedding cake and gluten free chocolate cookies for guests in their hotel rooms. The bride should always get what she wants and since Chelsea is a vegan it makes sense for her food choices

food@gairrhydd.com

Fact: In 1997 Pakistan's Supreme Court imposed a ban on serving food at wedding receptions held in public places. The court ruled the ban was not against Islamic teachings and should remain in force as it discourages extravagant displays of wealth. The ban on serving food at wedding functions held in public places is largely ignored in practice as to uphold it would only allow the serving of tea or soft drinks.

BOOKS

Stephen Vizinczey

REVIEWS Thomas Harris

In Praise of Older Women

Silence of the Lambs

‘This book is addressed to young men and dedicated to older women – and the connection between the two is my proposition.’ So begins In Praise of Older Women rator, Andras Vajda, and a series of women he encounters throughout his life. Far from being a

Thomas Harris’s Silence of the Lambs is a

presentation as a series of mini-essays. Although the narrative occasionally gets bogged down in detail (especially when dealing with Hungarian history), and the tone comes dangerously close to being self-pitying once or twice, it is a playful and

Rob Lloyd

novel. The antagonist is not the murderer, but the terrifying-yet-very-appealingly-and-verydangerous Dr Hannibal Lecter. For those not familiar with Harris’s work, you may want to start with Red Dragon, the book that launched the character of Lecter, before moving on to Silence of the Lambs. For me, though, it is the somewhat underrated Silence of the Lambs which is the most gripping of Harris’s novels. Hannibal Lecter utterly dominates the book. calm manner which conceals a bloodthirsty, savage cannibal-criminal and is eerily attractive. One word sums things up: danger. Danger sizzles from the pages and keeps you hooked throughout. Lecter is terrifying and this is a psychological thriller like no other. Harris, as author and director Clive Barker says, goes 'where few writers have the talent or sheer nerve to venture’. Read the book. And then – if Isabelle Roberts

books@gairrhydd.com

BOOKS

How'd ya like your books? Hardback vs paperback, a true quandary for any self-respecting literacy lover. Claire Travers has a think... We all know books rock, but the rivalry between paperback and hardback crops up all the time. Some argue for paperback and others for hardback Some argue for electronic books but that’s a whole difwhich is better – paperback or hardback? vantages. They are both cheaper and lighter than hardbounds. I like to carry a book with me at all times and a hardbound book is a lot less practical for this particular venture. I mean, try reading a few pages of Edgar Allen Poe’s cumbersome Complete Works whilst waiting for your coffee, as opposed to a slim paperback of his Selected Poems. It just doesn’t seem as feasible. Some people also state a few advantages, though, that seem erroneous to me. Firstly, that they are more comfortable to read. I know of nothing more comforting than a sturdy hardbound copy to curl up with. Hardbacks give you the sense that they will anchor you sturdily during your inevitably intense voyage through their pages. on a shelf, without resorting to jigsawing heavy volumes in at all angles. Personally, I would be more inclined to just get another bookshelf. But then that's me, and I can understand not everyone aspires to having their own personal library. In any case paperbacks, let’s not forget, tend to disintegrate far more easily than their brawnier hardbacked counterparts. After, say, two or three years of reading, storing and re-reading, paperbacks' pages become yellowed and creased and they just look quite dirty. The leaves get dog-eared quicker than the more substantial paper in a hardbound copy. So let us turn our attention to hardbacks. One supposed advantage attributed to hardback books is their longevity, and this is correct to a degree. Hardbacks tend to be better bound and have better quality paper, thus being more durable and having a longer life. But I suppose that if you have a treasured paperback, there seems no reason why care and repair cannot keep it in good health for as long as you. a table or in a cabinet, hardbacks tend to have more care and attention put into their display, both inside and out. And I have to say that I agree. There is a certain type of dedication put into them that paperbacks just lack - inscriptions and illustrations seem to have a dimension that paperback art just on cheap glossy paper. There are of course some major disadvantages. The weight and, more importantly, the price of So, hardbacks are heavy and possibly pricey but are they worth it? That depends. With or without the conscious effort of the literary industry paperbacks and hardbounds and just made for different purposes, depending on the nature of your reading. Take paperbacks. They wooden forks. They last just long enough but don't withstand years and years of heavy usage.

books@gairrhydd.com

BOOKS

Soft Or Hard?

This correlates with the nature of their intended consumption. They are transportable, made for quick reads- a chapter here, a few pages there - on your lunch break, on the train, in a sun lounger between dips in the pool. They hold with them a feeling of impermanence and accommodate modern literary enthusiasts, who read, as with many other fundamental activities, on the move. Yet some bestow upon paperbacks the kind of respect that seems, at least to me, disproportional to their actual status. Paperbacks are all well and good, but at the end of the day, they do not compete with a hardback. The hardback is made for permanence, made to last the times, to be passed on and be preserved. It is made to be pored over, kept at home in the warmth ready to be slowly digested over hours or days. It is the difference between fast food on the go, and a sit down candle-lit meal for two. I mean, would you would buy a ÂŁ2.50 salad from Costa Coffee and take it home to have at the table? But Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ll underline it, attach notes, inevitably stain it with tea, and I will eventually pass these on, or donate these. I must confess, my true heart will always belong to the hardbound editions. I treasure cans. I would never dream of writing in them, or even breaking the spines. They are to be read slowly and carefully, and well away from drinks of any kind.

Having spent many years lugging stacks of books around, I can understand the heaviness argumuch difference in terms of weight whether the cover is hard or soft! Aesthetically, a library of nice old uniform hardbacks can be rather nice to look at, but very few people outside of the minor aristocracy have the space and access to them. If you want a nice-looking bookshelf, surely a uniform hardbacks of different sizes and colours. Ultimately, though, the price has got to be a factor. Unless

months later. But this argument is surely on its way to irrelevance. Give it a generation and, for better or (arguGR

@gairrhydd.com

FASHION Maxi Dress £16

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FASHION

Brutal Brights Ditch your inhibitions Dazzle the grey days away fashion@gairrhydd.comm

Dress: Primark ÂŁ11

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FASHION

Shirt £5 Necklace £4 Harem pants £6 for 2

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Styled by Lucy Trevallion Photographed by Tom Armstrong Modelled by Migle Mikulenaite Makeup by Jess Wretlind Clothes by Primark

Top ÂŁ6 Skirt ÂŁ16

TRAVEL

PROS AND CONS TO

TRAVEL GUIDES Travel guides are quick and handy, but can their hackneyed prose hamper your sense of adventure:

Whether you are planning a 10 day break somewhere sunny or preparing for a gap year, travel guides are an essential part of any successful trip. You don’t have to have your head in a book for weeks before the event, Lonely Planet you can instantly maximise your holiday potential. You’ll know the best places to eat, the safest (and most dangerous) places to stay, the most exciting activities to do, the best methods of transport, and how to get value for money. As soon as you arrive your tailor- made holiday can begin. And, don’t think because it’s in a guide book everyone will be doing it- if you are more of a lone ranger and prefer to explore off the beaten track, there are plenty of independent guides like www.Notjustaholiday.com which offer impartial, practical advice to help you create an extraordinary travelling experience. Saint Augustine once wisely noted that ''The world is a book and you skip straight to the best bit! Anouska Moller-Butcher Guide books are a great starting point when planning a trip. They provide information tailored for any

Lonely Planet companion who held the solution to every disaster and the inspiration for any route; without it my advenfollowing of every suggestion it offers. Lonely Planet exactly that, a guide. They are there to indicate and suggest, not to prescribe. After using the guide book for Kitty Imbert

TRAVEL

India's hostels are notorious for their rooftop cafes. Visit any of these cafes in the evening, and table upon table will be accommodated by travellers or-

mountain's cooler climate had attracted so many tourists, that most hostels were full. It was through word of mouth that I discovered a tiny nearby village

their hefty Lonely Planet Guides (in an array of different languages), folding over pages and underlining the most culturally-stimulating destinations.

chilled atmosphere and sensational scenery.

Lonely Planet had written a measly two sentences about this hidden gem of a place and barely recom-

Lonely Planet, or any other highly-rated travel publication, will undoubtedly be the most important adventures. that you have read William Sutcliffe's novel Are you Experienced? Lonely Planet to the Bible. And there are numerous other people who wholeheartedly echo this sentiment, explaining why travel guides are quite so popular. huge emphasis on budget travelling found within such publications. For us students, this is crucial,

and travel fares. Without mine, for example, I would not have discovered the Shanti Guesthouse in India's holy Hindu city, Varanasi. It was the ideal traveller's haunt and less value for money. This meant meeting a huge range of people within the bustling hub of the city. Of course, staying in a hostel swarming with fellow travellers may not be everybody's ideal scenario, but ple from all over the world. (Note: do stay there if you visit Varanasi!)

unspoilt, and to stay a small secret amongst the privileged travellers that come across it, surely we want places that the country in question has to offer? It was this village that made me question my Lonely Planet writers had missed out other mind-blowing locations. Afterall, India is an overwhelmingly large and diverse coutry. Those who are free-spirited and venturesome may not want to plan their journey according to through world-wisely locals and more experienced travellers, and would probaby argue that the trip is more exhilirating as a a result. In a way I agree allows for a much more satisfying feeling when you stumble upon something brilliant. However, I can't help but argue that although travel guides are bursting with valuable information, they are similarly so condensed they don't tell you absolutely everything about a place. Once they have

exploration, and do try to send you off the beaten highly susceptible to the unavoidable 'Delhi Belly', it's ideal to have a guide that tells you what has been tried and tested, and recommends places to try the best local cuisine without suffering the next day. Travel guides are very upfront about which places are good and those which you should avoid at all costs. There are of course those who prefer to 'go it alone' without the aid of a guide, and there are interesting reasons as to why the travel guide isn't always implemental. One of the most picturesque places that I visited in India was a village that I came across

of the customs that can be expected. Why learn the trip in your beloved guide? There are many pros and cons, and it really does come down to personal choice, but rather than place yourself in a 'for' or 'against' category, in my mind there is no harm in purchasing a travel guide for your journey. Whether you choose to utilise it or not, it's worth having... just in case. Lia Martin

bus journey through the Himalayas, I found that the

travel@gairrhydd.com

W TRAVEL

THE ROYAL HONEYMOON: BRITS ABROAD

Since the announcement of the Royal Wedding, there have been wild speculations as to where the couple will be heading off for their honeymoon after their union at Westminster. Although Will and Kate have announced such things will only be discussed among a close circle of friends, ac-

While Charles and Diana went on their honeymoon they decided to stop at Gibraltar as a royal nod to the islandâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Britishness. So for their sonâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s honeymoon, jumping on the same bandwagon, class lads that invade the Spanish city every year. They will of course be staying at an all-inclusive The Sun nearby. Royal lager louts will be in order as night time approaches.

romantic way to enjoy the setting sun, although staying out any longer may put their lives in dan-

Alexis Gunner

travel@gairrhydd.com

Eleanor Hughes wins the 'Geometric Beauty' theme with this perspective defying photo. Next issue we're looking for your best travel photos so, as always, send your entries to quenchphotos@gairrhydd.com

PHOTOS

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In The Public Eye The business surrounding celebrities is a big one; this will come as a surprise to no one. The documentation of famous characters - their glorious rise, glamorous life, and, to the delight of some, gruesome

Heat and Hello! mags, our scowling brows are aimed at you), there is something distinctly amiss about how our ideas regarding someone can be so effortless shaped by a snapshot in time. Photography holds many a peculiar trait, but none so mislead as of his or her personality. Traditional portrait photography, as with the paintings from which it stemmed, was and is commonly used to symbolise the desirable aspects of the person in front of the lens- namely wealth, beauty, social graphic truthâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; that is created can deny people their own identity, as the person captured is nothing but -

and reinforced numerous times before. Their identity has been manufactured and pre-packaged to the

are like.

their focus. Photographs that show those always surrounded by this cloud of manufactured character as something of a real person can bring this cult of celebrity crashing down. If done so in an un-malicious Heat

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PHOTOS

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"Bacardi

LGBT+

SHUH-MYON-CHKO INTRODUCES... Campness and butchness have been a mine of jokes and giggles since the dawn of comedy. Taking our stereotypes with a pinch of salt, we are looking onscreen and online at “the only gays in the village”, “Biebians” and other sources of homo-hilarity diligently dug up for your delectation… Although painfully ridiculed we can’t help but chuckle at Dafydd Thomas, estranged in a Welsh village, or be endlessly amused by uber-camp Alexander in Queer As Folk, who in one of

The examples are everywhere; we may even encounter these characters on our way to a club ity that alters the seemingly one-dimensional reality around us. We should embrace the way make it our own. the "vicious homophobic" world, such as The Birdcage Queen of the Desert others.

. And so many

travaganza that is enjoy! Anna Siemiaczko

and coke, please, Myfanwy!" After bombarding yo u with the heaviest LGBT+ issu es for the past couple of weeks, we’ ve decided that it’s time to sit back and have a bit of a good ol’ chuckle.

A WORD WITH THE BOD FINDS EVERYTHING HOMO-HILARIOUS

We’re students - we all use computers and the majority of people I know spend most of their free time online. As an internet-addict, I’m in a good place to judge. Aside from compulsively checking my email/facebook and renewing my library books, the majority of that time involves poking around the queer blogosphere that I frequent. Maybe you too follow various blogs based on your interests and personality – you could be a budding fashionista, using blogs to track down the lastest look, or a maths student who can’t get enough of xkcd. It just so happens that I am a lesbian who the queerer side of the internet seems to be really fucking funny. Maybe it’s because there’s a fair amount of piss-take ammunition or maybe it’s a quick-witted form of defence. It’s certainly harder to poke fun at folks who are already laughing at themselves. Either way, on with the comedy! Has anybody heard the term ‘Biebian’? In case this particular portmanteau is all Greek to you – this is a neat little phrase which has emerged to describe all those lady-loving ladies who could easily be mistaken for a certain teen pop sensation. That’s right - there’s a whole website with real life pictures (lesbianswholooklikejustinbieber) acting as evidence – lesbians do look like Justin Bieber, and not infrequently. There is also a clothing range, one which I have been fortunate enough to see in action. I did genuinely once bump into a lesbian wearing a t-shirt saying ‘I’m not Justin Bieber’, proving that this is not an exclusively internet-based phenomenon. Think about it – tousled hair, cute smile, baggy low riding jeans and a t-shirt – total lezza. Plus both Bieber and Biebians both wear high-tops. I declare that it has been proven – they are the same. So yes – in addition to gratuitous pictures of doppelgangers too close to be anything other than uncanny, I like lists. For a good-natured giggle at the species that is the common lesbian, check out ‘Stuff Lesbians Like’ - a list compiled by the Sapphic bloggers on gracethespot.com who enjoy nothing more than a nice spot of self-mockery. And it’s quite realistic, a prime example being ‘Stuff Lesbians Like Part 5: the post mullet.’ As someone who has been known to cut her own hair (badly) and spent a few hours this week giving her friends dubiously shaven haircuts while under the in-

Bend it like Beckham Fried Green Tomatoes? Point proven. It would be somewhat redundant to state that the majority of websites I look at are lesbian-based blogspot.com, pretty hard-core dyke-humour, is funny whoever you are. Who could fail to appreciate the triumphant moment when a blog points out a universal truth that you knew all along, but just

the relentless search for signs of queerness is probably because, subconsciously, we’re always looking to reassure ourselves that we are not alone? Something like that anyway... Kate Boddington

ARTS

THE PASSION A SIGHT TO BE SHEEN Two months ago, whilst feeling rather peckish and a little frivalous, I set off to Swansea's new Indian restaurant on the seafront. Little did I know that whilst feasting upon a King Prawn Madras (my purse resented this choice) that I would catch sight of a Hollywood star... Sat tables behind me donning relatively understated cream jeans and a brown shirt was Mr. Michael Sheen. A little gobsmacked I teetered past in my high heels, having just been to the rather exotic toilets, and slumped back into my seat. Should I approach him and ask for an autopgraph? I decided against it given the fact he was also tucking into a rather large meal. Needless to say this got me thinking: why was Michael Sheen - perhaps best known for his portrayal of Tony Blair in The Queen and the vampire Aro in The Twilight Saga: New Moon - gobbling up a Korma at a restaurant in Swansea?! There must be some sort of valid reason... surely?? Alas upon my return home (and following numerous calls to friends to tell them who I had 'just eaten food with') I scoured the internet and stumbled across an interesting fact: Michael Sheen had returned to his hometown Port Talbot to creatively direct and act in National Theatre Wales' production of The Passion. This all takes place over the Easter Weekend (Friday 23rdSunday 24th April), so if you are intrigued (and would also like to catch a glimpse of Michael Sheen) have a little peek at our preview for more details. Katie Haylock

arts@gairrhydd.com

National Theatre Wales Port Talbot (in various outdoor locations) Easter Weekend

Port Talbot and Passion: an unlikely pair some might say but this year (and thanks to a certain Hollywood star by the name of Michael Sheen) Port Talbot will play host to National Theatre Wales’ production of The Passion – and this is certainly something that shouldn’t stay behind closed doors. Written by distinguished poet and novelist Owen Sheers, the play is inspired by a year of story-gathering, in which Sheers gives voice to Port Talbot’s tales of redemption, return and faith in a three-day event over the Easter weekend. Boasting a dazzling cast and the work of many local dance and theatre groups from the area, this play screams community amidst a time of hardship and strained bank accounts. Add creativity to the equation and you can forget the traditional theatre stage, curtain and popcorn because National Theatre Wales promises to deliver something a little more exhilarating having developed a reputation for involving its audiences as much as possible in innovative and daring ways. The Passion is no different. Grab the sunglasses (weather permitting), practical shoes and maybe an ice cream and be prepared to tour various outdoor locations from Aberavon Beach to the town centre. And (if you are on a budget) it is all free to watch provided you aren’t too fussy on your vantage point. The Passion and Passion", threatening to put the Easter Bunny out of a job: who needs a chocolate egg when you could have all this?! Tickets cost £5 (SA postcode), £20 (weekend wrist band) OR free if you don’t mind watching from the crowd! Catriona Camacho

'SHO' ME SOME MORE PLEASE

ARTS

'"Show": to exhibit, to be seen, to perform, to demonstrate, to make a point...a place to SHOoff art!' These are the words of the SHO gallery, an exciting and racy youngster on the art scene in Cardiff. The Gallery itself can be found tucked away just off Albany road at Inverness Place. Having only opened just last year, the bright white space houses a shop and gallery containing a mixture of original artworks, prints and designer homeware, t-shirts and jewellery. So if you were looking for a gift this wouldn't be a bad place to start (although perhaps most students wouldn't be all that excited with designer tea towels even if they did enjoy the brand name 'to dry for'!). However, if you are in the market for something a little less 'dishy' then the printed t-shirts might be a bit more up your street. Also on offer are the elusively titled 'Vinyl Art Collectables' (this creatures (at a loss as to how to describe them) poking their heads out of tea cups. These are the work of artist Matt Jones (a.k.a Lunartik), and if anyone is familiar with Mr. Scruff's tea-based merchandise this runs along the same lines (I am always pleased to see art that incorporates tea in some way!). The artwork is generally of an urban, cartoon-like style and does not take itself too seriously- several of the pieces are of a childlike and playful nature. It is 'modern' but not in the 'half a of places, everything is carefully arranged and welcoming. It is sometimes the case in small art galleries that you can feel under the watchful eye of the proprietor, but the SHO gallery manages a reasonably relaxed atmosphere. It is clear that the owners haven't put their feet up much since opening. They have already played host to several artists, most of whom debuted during the local art initiative 'Made in Roath' at the end of last year. More recently they staged a group exhibition entitled SHO-me Illustration, which boasted a vibrant mixture of hand-drawn and digital images from artists such as Poked Studio, Liz Price and Renato Pequito. On closer inspection I found I enjoyed (and related with) Pequito's description of his works the most. He says: "I like simple, geometric shapes and love to translate the world, as I see it, through them. I also like biscuits very much." So there you go: tea and biscuit themed work. What more could you want? Sonia Llewellyn

35 53

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Arts scene We WILL rOcK YOU We Will Rock You literally rocks you. It propels you loudly and blindingly into a futuristic world of Planet Mall, where Killer Queen rules the massive cooperation of Globalsoft. From this world individuality is echewed, along with live music, singing and instruments. Computerised identikit pop and cloned Ga-Ga Girls are all that is allowed. The Ga-Ga Girls dance systematically and talk in shrill tones providing a stark contrast to those The Underworld. This world upon the stage becomes disordered as we meet the Bohemian rebels. Each rebel is named after musical icons of our near past or present, thus engaging with all ages of the audience. The Rebels worship a musical text from a time called the Rhapsody. For Queen enthusiasts it may be recognised that Bohemian Rhapsody was Queen’s songs, encouraging us to become actively involved towards the end. Queen and Ben Elton have worked together to produce a performance that appreciates Queen’s Songs and their prestigious take on rock. The performance is crammed with sexual innuendoes, provocative dancing and of course, strobe lighting, disco balls, ‘techno’ gadgets and loud instrumentals. These material aspects conveniently disguise, for me, what could be considered a series of weaker sub plots. The two protagonists Galileo and Scaramouche sing and of the squashed ‘Living Rock’ is excruciatingly boring and quite simply, obvious. Minor pessimism aside you can be sure the music makes up for this. With Brian May and Roger Taylor participating as music supervisors, Queen songs have never sounded so majestic. Millie Flint

tWeLFtH nIGHt The Act One group have been stealthy this year. Unbeknown to anyone, they’ve been plugging away relentlessly at their scripts and polishing up their acting skills to give us, the viewing audience, a selection of fantastically performed visual delights. And delights, ladies and gentleman, they certainly have been. In Pride and Prejudice they brought us pompous English accents and Austen’s unbridled cynicism, in The Crucible, a bloody good soundtrack (salute to you, music master for Bonobo in the opening scene), and chair-gripping drama. And last week, reproducing yet another pièce de résistance, the cast of Twelfth Night proved they too were worthy of commendation. Every character was brilliantly evoked: Olivia, noble and demure, glided seamlessly across the stage, Sir Toby Belch was vulgar beyond all measure, Feste oozed with foolishness and wowed us with his vocals, and Maria showed us all that even a young waiting-gentlewoman can steal the limelight with copious amounts of wit and charisma. The plot was clear, stage well-dressed and seats comfortable, and there were even sweets to nibble on whilst you chortled away at Malvolio’s leaving- nothing-to-theimagination yellow tights. Another top performance from the gang, and one which has certainly left me gagging for more. Simone Miche

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OscilliatiOns People who shudder at the idea of the Broadway Dance Society, imagining some sort of Pineapple Dance Studios nightmare led by a local Louie Spence, would be pleasantly surprised by the truth, as discovered by me at the society’s show, Oscillations. From the striking Bollywood-inspired opening to the spectacusatisfy all dance tastes, showcasing ballet, tap, modern, contemporary, street and acrobatics. Furthermore, whilst including dance classics such as the iconic Dance of the Little Swans, the show also included many surprising and unexpected music choices, whichhelped to involve the uninitiated in the world of dance. I hadn’t expected to see a tap dance to Plan B, but it was great! Other highlights were a stunning performance of the Cell Block Tango from Chicago, a wonderful jazz routine to Bad Romance and displays of acrobatics that thrilled the audience. As well as impressive group performances, various soloists also shone in their numbers. All in all, the range of abilities, the diversity of the costumes and the variety of styles showcased made for a thoroughly enjoyable show. Congratulations to all involved! Becca Eustis

the histOry BOys I sat in anticipation to be introduced to the most recent cast of Alan Bennett’s The History Boys. With just a simple collection of props on stage, an acclaimed script set to an eighties soundtrack was all that was needed to hold this audience’s attention. The energy created by the eight schoolboys was overportrayed Bennett’s Northern pupils brilliantly. Deadon Yorkshire accents and comic timing created a true sense of companionship between these classmates. Most impressively, George Banks gave Dominic Copper a run for his money with his take on heart throb Dakin, making him smarmy but still charming. Literature-loving Hector (Phillips Franks) was expressed in precisely the eccentric way he should have been and Rob Delaney produced a wonderful portrayal of love-struck, sexually-confused Posner especially in his piano-led rendition of Barnett and Parker's Bewitched. The History Boys makes a mockery of the education system. But for me, the true morals of education were delivered just before the curtain fell. Stood in a single line, the eight former school boys are brought together for the parting song. Their harmonies and their performances were perfectly in tune with Bennett’s script. An A plus production. Laura Evans

5337

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MUSIC

Editorial

This is the last issue before we all disappear home for Easter and get bogged down with essays and revision so make the most of it by coming to Quench Live, the Music section's AMAZING gig (no this is not a shameless plug!) Head down to 10 Feet Tall on Tuesday 12th April to see five incredible local talents. Starting off the night are two innovative acoustic acts. Then folk sensation Three Pairs of Shoes are on, followed by instrumental rock band Tigerline. Psychedelic country group No Thee No Ess headline the outstanding line-up, followed by DJ's late into the night. With music to suit all different tastes and 2-4-1 cocktails, it is well worth ÂŁ2 NUS! In the spirit of the Royal Wedding we had a debate as to what Will and Kate would have for their first dance. Prince Charming by Adam and the Ants was suggested, as was anything by Queen or Prince. But the real question is this: do they have a first dance or a disco for that matter? Will the Queen get down to Like a G6? If anyone is invited do let us know. Emma Wilford

gairrhyddmusic@gmail.com

DOING IT FOR THE GIRLS Emma Wilford met Kate Nash to talk about her tour, her afterschool club and why she doesn’t give a shit what the press say about her.

message I want to bring through my clubs. Is it important to encourage young people to be musical? I think a lot of people are discouraged because they’re told "you’ll never make it" but there are so many ways you can take your career into your own hands with the internet. You also gain creative skills that, at a young age, can give people confidence. Hi Kate, what’s your favourite part of touring? Just playing the show every night and hanging out with people that you like. Brigitte Aphrodite is supporting me and she’s really amazing. And your least favourite? Getting ill and not being able to do anything about it because of the late nights. Your last album My Best Friend is You has been out for a while; have you got plans for new material? Not this year 'cause I haven’t written it yet but I'm definitely going to write a third one. You've started after-school music clubs for young girls - what inspired you to do this? Last summer I did a panel talk for Miranda Sawyer from the Observer about the gender gap in the music industry as only 14% of royalties from songs go to female songwriters. After that I watched an interview about these summer camps in New York that get kids to play music and I thought it would be cool to bring it to the UK. Do you think new female solo artists are a good inspiration for girls? I can’t speak in terms of all of them as some are good and some are rubbish. I feel like there is only one way that women are presented as popstars and that’s the only thing you can be but there are loads of other options and that’s the

The music industry is tough. How do you deal with criticism? You have to be thick-skinned and try and avoid it as much as possible. It used to really upset me but now I feel a bit tougher. I think I’ve already been called all the worst things you could think of ! It's important to keep doing positive things and remember why you wanted to do music in the first place rather than worrying what the media thinks. No-one ever changed the world if they didn’t offend anybody and if you’re trying to do something good then you’ll probably piss a few people off. What music are you listening to right now? I'm really bad at new artists. I love Emmy the Great, Warpaint, Shrag, Romance and, of course, Brigitte Aprhodite. What do you do when you’re not being musical? I read a lot. My favourite book ever is Valley of the Dolls - if you haven’t read it you absolutely have to read it! I left the interview surprised: I’m not sure entirely what I expected but I didn’t think Kate would be so sweet and down to earth. She is opinionated and ballsy and clearly wants to make a change to the state of the music industry. Good on her!

MUSIC

JapaneSe VoyeUrS .

You were recently on the Rock Sound Exposure tour with Dinosaur Pile-Up and the Xcerts; how was that? Was there ever any rivalry with the revolving headliner concept? Steve [Wilson, drums]: Not at

What can we expect from Yolk? Any ballads? Johnny [Seymour, bass]: Weâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re R:

R: S:

Romily [Alice, vocals/guitar]:

got quite a range. R: -

J: R:

seeing everyone. The majority of the press liken you to the 1990s grunge scene; is that a fair comparison? S:

Considering his pedigree with the likes of Rage Against The Machine, Red Hot Chili Peppers bum be released and whyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s it and the Melvins, what was it taking so long? like working with Garth Rich- R: ardson on your debut album? S:

Tom [Lamb, guitar]: Grunge metR: Who would you say are your R: -

gairrhyddmusic@gmail.com

You originally entered the XFactor as Project A a couple years ago. What was the main impact of that experience on the group? We’d just started out but we thought ally far it did bring us together as a group and we started to believe in ourselves a lot more. We never expected to win so it wasn’t such a blow when we didn’t. Before [The X-Factor] we didn’t really have a ok this is what we need to do and what direction we want to go in.

slower ones too? It’s a goody-bag of treats; we have a few ballads on there already. We do a lot of harmonies so it is nice to show them off in the ballads. There is something for everyone; we are really proud of it. The fact that Kylie asked you on tour with her is pretty impressive. Kylie has not had an opening act support slot to be in arenas is so overwhelming; we are so lucky for that. She loved what we were trying to do and thought she would give us a chance which was really nice of her. The show is amazing; we watch it every night and are learning so much just watching her perform.

one cares at that age. Then we can and take them with us every step of the way. Music changes every will still take pop through with it. Any advice for other young singers? Practise every day as hard as you luck and being in the right place at the right time. You have to put and try everything- try things like X-Factor. People slate it and say it

Your new single, Girls Will Be Girls, is due for release on 18th April; can you describe it a bit for our readers? It is meant to grab your attention and get stuck in your head. It is Kylie has had a long and successful career throughout where she has experimented with her sound; is that something you about having fun! hope to do in the future? You have an album in the works, released towards the end of younger audience because we think they are the ones who will summer; is there a title yet? get us- all the fun and not taking say though that it does what it says things too seriously. We have a strong message we want to send on the tin.

and you learn a lot from it.

Will it be full of catchy upbeat have to be dressing like her or her. songs or will there be some They are all wearing short skirts

back.

A few student related questions: what’s your favourite fancy dress theme? Superheroes! Favourite food after a night out? a big kebab! Finally, what are your thoughts about Cardiff ? It is a really nice city and the people are really nice as well- a laid

Matthew Collins caught up

Ultra Girls?

MUSIC

ALBUMS Green Day: old dogs, new tricks?

Green Day

Awesome as F**k Reprise

7/10

decades, is pretty good, but true

cessful.

Holiday sounds absolutely mastracks. If Awesome as Fuck was just

some songs develop is fantastic.

Regardless of your opinion on -

would imagine sound a lot better metal is, at times, brave and very

corded in excellent clarity from sixteen worldwide venues, propteen-strong setlist performed at

album, not a single song really James Archer

plus a studio version of an unreleased track. An impressively ambitious of-

Armstrong's grandstanding vari-

Japanese Fighting Fish

Just Before We Go Mad Vandal Records

6/10

sounds relatively similar to Pixies and if you are a fan of bands

different performances makes it debut album Mad some slick editing between tracks. attracted a lot of critical atten- more inebriated version of Serj tion and are expected to be sucLuke Owain Bolt

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MUSIC

Mastodon

Live at the Aragon Reprise

7/10 Recent years have seen Mastodon hailed as one of metal’s most exciting bands and, with this, their foursome are intent on proving that their psychedelic, diverse approach to the genre can translate to a live setting. Indeed, for Live at the Aragon, Mastodon set themselves a formidable task in performing the entirety of 2009’s Crack the Skye but, fortunately, Live at the Aragon demonstrates their technical prowess on all levels. From the opening feedback which announces the arrival of Oblivion to The Last Baron’s unhinged, 15-minute rollercoaster journey, Crack the Skye is every bit as powerful as its studio incarnation, in some cases even more so thanks to the punishing rawness of the band’s live performance. However, considering that the album’s alleged story involves the art aesthetics of Tsarist Russia, out of body experiences and wormholes, it’s an odd

move to bury anything that pertains to the human voice so low in the mix, particularly when the vocal performances are, on the whole, on target. Nevertheless, Live at the Aragon remains an impressive release thanks to its accomplished production and razor-sharp riffage; in particular, Blood Mountain’s Circle of Cysquatch and closing cover The Bit (originally by the Melvins) are agonisingly brutal and threaten to rip apart the mortal speakers which transmit their omnipotent intensity. This is a powerful album, make no mistake, but the band’s decision to obscure their singing voice beneath a layer of guitars hints at a more fragile, self-conscious side, and this is not necessarily what one looks for with this particular selection of songs. Michael Brown

Toy Horses

Toy Horses Albino Sparrow

3/10

last year, the father-son duo have received praise from BBC’s Tom Robinson and Steve Lamacq, become a ‘featured band’ on Xfm, and have even had tracks picked up by Radio One and 6 Music. Despite all the hype, their self-titled debut album is nothing I haven’t heard before. Opening track Play What You Want embodies the style of music that the band’s own press release has described as “perfectly packaged radio play”, which I would roughly translate as “manufactured garbage”. While some songs are quite chirpy and melodic, others are just damn whiney. A prime example would be second track And It Was You, which could easily be a reject from an album by The Feeling (although I do enjoy the irony of their decision to repeat the line “we’re just like everybody else” over and over). After thirty-three minutes of whimsical drivel, I’m relieved I suppose the music isn’t awful, it’s just boring. When so many bands already sound like this, I have to wonder whether we really need any more. If you’re a mas-

Cardiff ’s own Toy Horses are set to enjoy whirlwind success. this album. Since posting demos on MySpace

Joanne Southerd

gairrhyddmusic@gmail.com

MUSIC

Live

Katy Perry

Cardiff Motorpoint Arena 1st April Cardiff and California are hardly the most comparable of locales but, judging from the reactions from Friday’s crowd at the Motorpoint Arena, they might not be quite so distant after all. Such sun-kissed sensations came courtesy of Katy Perry and her exframed by the candy-dominated scenery of the California Gurls music video. With such a theatrical show, production and musical performance become inextricably linked and, as such, the songs which comprised Perry’s California Dreams set followed a loose plot: from her unsatisfying vocation as a butcher’s assistant to encounters with gay mimes, gingerbread lust, hash brownies and a quest for a suspiciously human-shaped cat (wittily named ‘Kitty Purry’), it is safe to say that Perry is, well, a bit mental. However, this is not with hits like Teenage Dream and Firework also demonstrating her impressive, and oft-overlooked, vocal abilities. However, the sheer number

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of costume changes which took place throughout resulted in a somewhat stilted performance, with story breaks often feeling tiresome. Fortunately, Perry’s band occasionally broke the tedium, with one particular instance of smooth jazz vamping eventually developing into a sultry rendition of I Kissed a Girl. Later, a number of acoustic covers provided welcome relief from the script, with Perry issuing a variety of Welsh quips to mark her it was these personal touches, in combination with the mammoth stage show, which made the night a success, displaying a human side to an otherwise otherworldly experience. Michael Brown

Kate Nash The Globe 30th March Wednesday was the night that Kate Nash and her girl gang rolled into town set on showing Cardiff how to have a good time. It quickly became clear that this was going to be one for the girls; before a single note was strummed there was a video explaining Kate’s recent work trying to get more women involved in music and song writ-

ing, and encouraging young girls to give it a go. Kate’s supporting act Brigitte Aphrodite (signed to Ms. Nash’s new mini-label) needed no encouragement however, getting the crowd dancing along with ease in the intimate venue. Thus it was even more of a shame when Kate and her “girl band” seemed to take a bit longer to whip up the same enthusiasm; hits like Mouthwash and Foundations got people singing and moving along, but they just couldn’t seem to keep it going, resulting in the odd inevitable breaks where some people seemed more interested in their Blackberries. But once the girls hit their stride half-way through, you knew that this was what a Kate Nash gig was meant to be about: having a good time and not caring how you looked dotivated, with the Globe suddenly becoming a much livelier place; pumping out after another. It was a great atmosphere and a triumphant end to the evening, but it was just a shame that Kate seemed to be let down at times by a somewhat unenthusiastic crowd. Eleanor Hughes

MUSIC

Kylie Minogue CIA 26th March 8:00pm and out onto the stage bound the Ultra Girls with energy in abundance. Each sporting a completely individual and seemingly personality driven

gle. The only issue I had was that the bass seemed slightly too loud and seemed to drown out a few of the lyrics but this is not a

supporting set with forthcoming debut single Girls Will Be Girls. The dance routine was as tight as you would expect from a group of former cheerleaders and the girls were most certainly pleasing on the eye but thankfully their appeal stretched beyond this as their visual performance was matched with strong vocals throughout. The beats were typically pop; infectious and easily danceable and the crowd responded well considering most had probably not heard

in fact I can see them doing very well based on this solid performance. A DJ then tied the crowd over with some rather uninspired the large drapes obscuring most of the stage disappeared and the main spectacle began. At this point I should make it clear that I doubt any words could quite translate the intricacy of costumes that ensued but it was

Singles

certainly theatrical and truly captivating. Kylie may not appeal to everyone’s taste however it is impossible to argue against how successful she has been and that is in part due to her knack for identifying a catchy song and personifying a feel good spirit. This was evident in every detail from her chosen set list to to mention an apparent attempt to outdo herself in every subsequent song. The night culminated with the of different coloured neon water shooting from the stage and and a highly memorable experience. Matthew Collins

Sarabeth Tucek

All The Young

PJ Harvey

The Glorious Land Island Records

Never Let me Go The Echo Label

6/10

For The First Time Warner Records

PJ Harvey is a treasure for manyou would have perhaps expected - pleasant voice perfectly suited to All the Young to harbour a much background music whilst workmellower sound. Their debut sin- and This Glorious Land is no difgle For the First Time - has made me intrigued to hear is primarily a rock record with poseful at the same time. In the energetic drums and commandare occasionally unclear due to ing vocals from Ryan Dooley. lyrics such as 'What is the glori- the mixing and so some of the No doubt it’ll be blaring across ous fruit of our land/The fruit is barbeques all over Britain. It’s deformed children.' would seem al events described is lost. For unobtrusive easy-listening with me this prevents this good song a distinctly British edge at its Harvey still retains an unnerving from being great. heart. theatricality. Matthew Collins Lia Martin gairrhyddmusic@gmail.com

Film. News.

While none of us will remember the original, â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;70s cop drama boot starring Ray Winstone and Ben Drew, a.k.a. Plan B. Anyone who saw Drew as a violent thug in Harry Brown will have no doubt in his capability to carry off a hard-nut cop. A bit of procrastination can occasionally lead to progress! A reliable IMDB site fruitfully produced the news that Abraham Lincoln : Vampire Hunter

While Speilberg makes a more wholesome biopic of the former Prez., we are curiously charmed by the idea that Lincoln's slavery

Pixar news at two for the price of none. Firstly, if you wish to see the Students' Union reach its cultural zenith ('cept for the lus and see 1,2,3! Pixar movies on the 14th of April (vote on the SU site to choose which). It may

TRAILER The Hangover: Part II

#22

TRASH

Face tattoos, inexpliccable hair (but not beard) loss and primates with a penchant for fellatio: not a list of themes for upcoming Thursday nights at Walkabout, but the most anticipated comedy of 2011. Indeed, the Wolf Pack are back, a fresh bout of alcohol-induced amnesia in tow. more of the same, you'll look forward to ROFL-ing wholeheartedly at the and co. hit Thailand with their lovable booze-fuelled idiocy. On the other hand, perhaps the gang might have thing that, y'know, isn't exactly the Matt Ayres

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just redeem the fact Come Play exists. In addition, Pixar have announced Monsters University, the follow up to ..Inc. Rumour is it's a prequel, which is a new move for Pixar. But with Up Producer and Toy Story 3 story artist Dan Scanlon directing an already warming and wonderful franchise, this should Care rather than Scare. EKB & LG

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BEST

FOR...

...saving the universe Serenity (2005)

...inspiring slackers Clerks (1994)

...escaping from prison The Rock (1996)

(and

was equally -

but -

Morten Wright

is one James Asher James Asher film@gairrhydd.com

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FILM OF THE WEEK Source Code Dir: Duncan Jones Cast: Jake Gyllenhaal, Michelle Monaghan, Vera Farmiga

8/10 Source Code is effectively the worst day of Jake Gyllenhaal’s life. As a U.S. Army pilot, he wakes up confused and alone, in a contraption that magically (with science) inserts him into the body of a Chicago commuter on a soon-to-be-bombed train in the hope that he can find the culprit and stop another attack. Perhaps understandably, he fails, and so spends most of the brief running time being repeatedly blown up and dumped back in the mysterious machine. Suspense takes an expected hit in this bizarre setup – neither the bomb nor the bomber feel particularly dangerous when the good guys (Vera Famiga as Gyllenhaal’s stern military handler and Jeffrey Wright as the enigmatic leader of this unlikely science project) have a healthy supply of do-overs, even with the vague time constraint presented by the second attack. Neverthe-

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less, go in with a willingness to put logic aside and it’s a glossy and hugely entertaining action thriller, supported by a charming and likeable lead. If anything, his many mistakes - ranging from socially embarrassing to horribly fatal - make success an increasingly irresistible prospect. It’s no slouch, either: the story hurtles forward at an excitingly brisk pace, though at the cost of what little plausibility it has to spare. A romance sub-plot with a fellow doomed passenger is so rushed it’s almost as unbelievable as the mind-swap technology, yet it suddenly bloats itself out well after the climax is reached and most of the audience have stopped caring. Still, a personal touch on Source Code’s delightful silliness isn’t entirely unwelcome, and turns out to be a mere sliver of fat on an otherwise lean and satisfying piece of cinema. James Archer

Limitless Dir: Neil Burger Cast: Bradley Cooper, Robert De Niro, Abbie Cornish

7/10

Based upon the myth that we can only access 20% of our brain, Limitless poses the thriller genre’s ultimate ‘what if ?’ concept by exploring the notion of being able to fully engage with our mind. Enter Eddie Morra (Bradley Cooper), an epitome of a tragic loser. Early on, we see the desperately despondent nature of Eddie’s aimless life as he frusing his book for the nth time. This leaves him alienated from everyone around him, including his girlfriend (Abbie Cornish) who swiftly ditches him. After bumping into an old drug dealing friend, Eddie despairingly takes solace in the mysterious NZT pill. Within seconds, his neurological capacity to process any form of information and memory goes beyond comprehension. Suddenly, Eddie same evolution process that had

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previously left him redundant. This transformation pays testament to Burger’s exceptional visionary talent, illustrating the otherwise intangible processes of the brain. Likewise, the cinematography, particularly the use of the fractal lens camera to obscurely navigate through NY City is equally spectacular, without becoming a gimmick. Eddie then invests into the Van Loon (De Niro). But, as with any drug, the high preludes the emerge as we follow the calculating paranoia of Eddie in search of a solution. It's in this side that Cooper excels in. His vulnerable performance dispels the cursory depth attributed to his usual roles. Cooper proves that he can hold his own without the ensemble ‘wolf pack’ supporting him. De Niro also holds a commanding presence, which partially redeems his mid-life crisis in The Little Fockers. He skilfully encompasses the volatile element of his character, without sinking into melodrama. As for Cornish, she delivers a promising performance, but due to a lack of development, she largely resides in the backseat of this spiralling drug-fuelled trip that, otherwise, deserves a watch. Sally Chan

Archipelago Dir: Joanna Hogg Cast: Amy Lloyd, Christopher Baker, Lydia Leonard

8/10 I have to make this clear straight everyone. That is not to say it is not very good because it is, but it is certainly an acquired taste. The story of a family trip to the Scilly Isles before the son goes to Africa for a year of charity work is the perfect portrait of a silent hell. It’s a slow burner with lasting impact caused by some characters gradually getting under your skin contrasted with growing feelings of empathy for others without you even realising. Despite earlier saying that

at times of strain. It really is the characters that cast do them real justice in this case. The chemistry between Tom Hiddleston, Lydia Leonard and Kate Fahy leads you to think they are actually related off screen. With quick snipes and prolonged awkward silences each confrontation is performed to a tee, all the while being reluctantly observed by the family’s cook and artist friend. These beautiful performances are matched by a beautiful setting. isles provide moments of calm accompanied by the haunting sounds of the wind and birds. Underlying all these moments of tension however is the realisation that whilst the family infuriate each other what they really fear is losing each other. Morten Wright

will appeal to everyone, there is certainly something that evewhether it be the subtle sibling rivalry, the tension over the dinner table or the frustrating need to present the image of familial harmony when other people are around. These are all examples of Archipelago’s admirably realised representation of family life film@gairrhydd.com

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Norwegian Wood Dir: Anh Hung Tran Cast: Rinko Kikuchi, Kenichi Matsuyama, Kiko Mizuhara

6/10

To say that celluloid is slightly less inexpensive than paper as a means for conveying narrative is an understatement as misrepresentative as saying that the sun is slightly hotter than a conventional microwave. Such is the price gap between celluloid and paper that an intrinsic problem is faced by anyone attempting cinematic adaptations of particularly affecting pieces of prose. No matter how good the cinema version, there will always be plot lines that aren’t fully explored, characters that aren’t fully developed and narratives that aren’t fully executed. As such, the proposition of tion, written by one of the most mythical and transcendent con-

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temporary writers, the legendary Haruki Murakami, being adapted for cinema goers worldwide presented me with a real mix of emotions. On the one hand, Anh Hung Tran’s ability to aestheticise human relationships could lend itself ideally to the minutiae of Murakami’s creations, but the breadth of Murakami’s narrative scope within Norwegian Wood is something that would be a lot harder to translate to the big screen. Accordingly, I entered the screening with expectations that it would be hard, if not impossible, to live up to. From the outset, there are major plot lines that are completely removed, serving to completely undermine the subtley of the original narrative: various deaths (yes, it is quite a sombre affair, but anyone familiar with Murakami’s writing will know that anyway), events and relationships are left unexplained prior to their respective revelations- a descision which ultimately leads to confusion and irritation However, for what Norwegian Wood lacks in narrative coherence, it makes up for with

stunning cinematography. Tran’s camera work juxtaposes naturalistic imagery, both at macro and panoramic level, with an almost mercurial eye for that which is beautiful. Main protagonist Toru Watanabe 's burgeoning romance (a term I use extremely apprehensively) with the emotionally unavailable Naoko is framed by plush, expansive images of Japanese countryside, which equally enhances the overriding lonelicharacters. Claiming Wood

that

Norwegian

does most of its communicating on a purely emotional level. It’s impossible not to feel compelled by each protagonist’s downward trajectory into loneliness and despair, some more devastatingly than others. Yet, there is an ageof: that unless you’ve read the book you’re unlikely to go see the you're likely to be slightly disappointed. Jon Berry

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(...in which we reminice, repute and revere cinema's most

eponymous

)

Defining Film: The Red Shoes (1948)

Michael Powell & Emeric Pressburger

When Black Swan premiered around the world last

The Red Shoes is Powellâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s hallucinatory sequences are peppered with Hithcock-

erotic all at once.

Also Recommended: The Life And Death of Colonel Blimp (1943) A Matter of Life and Death (1946) Black Narcissus (1947) (1960) -

'60s a veteran director, who in the 1920s, worked on several Alfred Hitchcock on Blackmail. the direct expressiveness of theme seen

a spectacular career of his own. Howthe way it was killed stone dead after the release of the notorious Peeping Tom. It

career of someone with an intuitive un-

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Kings & Queens

of the Silver Screen

With the royal wedding fast approaching there are only three certainties: an excess of pointless crockery, nothing on TV and a stag night organised by Prince Harry which should put The Hangover to shame. For now though, the Windsors can take a back seat as Morten Wright takes a look at British acting royalty...

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KIng and Queen(S):

For me there is only one rightful king - Michael Caine. He is one of the most recognisable actors in the world and his acting prowess and charm is timeless. His career has spanned decades, including classics ranging from The Italian Job to The Muppet Christmas Carol and he still has a huge impact on cinema today, not to mention the fact that he is Christopher Nolanâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s lucky charm. Choosing the rightful queen is much trickier, however. A decision must be reached, and if Henry VIII could have six wives, then King Michael can have two. Helen Mirren and Judi Dench have both considered British acting royalty. More recently Dench is perfect as M in the Bond franchise and Mirren is still an actress in demand, frequently popping up on the big screen. Both have also shown, by making names for themselves on the small screen in Prime Suspect and As Time Goes By, that when 'one' wants to ascend the throne, it doesn't hurt to diversify.

FrInge royaLty: No Royal Family would be complete without the quirky, slightly eccentric and downright insane distant relatives who make up the fringe royalty. Julie Walters is the perfect example. She is Mamma Mia and Calendar Girls but also has great depth in more serious roles, not to mention her brilliantly spot-on appearances as Mrs gruff ex-military, with a soft side Duke. Again he is an actor with a great range of performances from The Long Good Friday to Hook and Who Framed Roger Rabbit. Like the queens of this family neither have shied away from the small screen, with Walters starring in numerous sitcoms such as Dinnerladies The Street. The British acting community needs these kinds of stars to provide a breath of fresh air with their lack of fear to try something different.

HeIrS to tHe tHrone: him? Whilst Jude Law is trying his best, taking on roles in remakes of the current kingâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s work in and Sleuth for me there is only one option for a future king, Michael Fassbender.

like Hunger and Inglourious Basterds, and with blockbusters on the horizon in the shape of X-Men: First Class and Prometheus, he is certainly going places and is a good bet to replace Daniel Craig as Bond. blow the rest of the competition out of the water, but for now I will opt for Gemma Arterton. She has The Disappearance of Alice Creed and is being noticed for roles in bigger, albeit fairly poor, blockbusters. However, if she makes a few better choices then the throne could well be hers. As for the future of the fringe royalty, Dukes Pegg and Frost of Winchester has a certain ring to it... film@gairrhydd.com

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