Polaroid (2nd Issue)

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I woke up this morning and felt stronger than ever before. But it was just until I put my feet on the carpet and felt the ground with all the reality I face everyday… I kept sitting on the bed perched on the corner. How little would I need to keep my balance?… Finally I’m awake. The stream from the shower washing away my dreams and secret possessions. But I’m still strong. I grew up this way. I cover my body with firm clothes… Just like 20 years ago when my

brother and I used to go and play wars in the woods… I look in the mirror to make sure that it’s truly me standing in front of it. I whisper goodbye. I’m ready… Ready for a new start - a new beginning. Something ordinary that I could treat as my own. On my way I whisper the lyrics I wrote when I was thirteen. It reminds me of the questions I want answers to…

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Who can tell me… Why my mummy’s eyes do not shine as they should? Why we have to face so many glimpses of sorrow from the woods? Why did my dad have to go to the place Where I’m not allowed? Why I can feel him beside but cannot reach his smile? Why can’t I argue with him? Who can tell me… Why I lose my breath and my eyes drown When I’m thinking of him? Why the pain in my heart is full to the brim? Would it make me a better person today? I know only one thing… I’m different from you Because I have an invisible Orphan’s tattoo…

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I

fin rep a ally eat ca sm r it lu n b all b each a co n br ch uy isc m up no eak bre fr uit y le o A t th s a ak esh fac des f t lik fter e re s w . Bu co tor tina ime all as ell t I ok y w tio s a A e or ctua cook , ev on f as don ies her n. nd an a b lly ie ery or the ’t h for e y It’s m d h oy , I d s. Th bod me co ave yo ou m ine is g as on e y k com oki lun ur ev ost . He end I’ve ’t kn rea now ing es a ch he re hi er m is er ne ow son s th s gu hear elan the is s ver if is I do re. i er it d. c n o m se i e… ar It ho ne pl en t’s a he… ’t St ring ma lic wh y a his gi an s ke m o gu fa rl di ou s p ng t j m elod lay ess o ce in ust e th ies s th f fro be in e nt cau k t i’ve of se hat hi I’m m .

I w giv m ays e h Bu e a …A im m t I sm nd my al usi hav ile b I k co on one c a e to ack now oki go fo th e; sh ly in ny I ow a t the lon . I r a at h like ne hop s up inn dar ger can mo e g alfe xt e h th y li k c . I ’t en men ives bo ct p stop e lik e si ght orr lea joy t. hi fa ok lac is es lho fro idor ve s yo vou an e to a co my uett m o wh him sit ffe coo e o ut ere no ur rite d ro t f no sm enjo do e sh kie f hi side sh w… or se. ell y i wn, op. … m. Th t t B A t o o m op u e t m As day t t f co wh ake per e h y o y s ff il t he fee oon or is p ee e yo our ch t im a eve lea tic ur a ng me s I n t sure kles in d en om i i g ro atel ter or- s o y th m . brin e g

9. 5 m mo pe aki re ju op ng mi I st t le w coff nut re kno o f ho ees es a n ad w ollo co . I nd o t Ev ses and hem w t me ma I’m k an ery th w a he he e a ou d d d e m hich ll; w ir d re the lrea th r m rin ay h os sm ha aily eve m dy fe e s en ks d e t. E ell t b ro ry d for po els ame u. Th iff brin xce tic ook uti ay is e eren gs pt f kle s th ne. w in s o t ha ill r I’m fam his only t be a n rom s th ey e i A s n un a lia sm th ve ew o ir wh nd eve out frai r to ile. ing rage bo ne. o h I’ll r ha of d t m It tha fro ok h e s t d e is. leav fro the at o … A ome stay m e w m dri ne t ho s i th our nks da som w n m t yw e h o e an nu. at h e e s w er of

Th so at’s by ha th gr exp rd t e re th edi er o c aso wi e su ents ime reat n w Bu th pe we nti e so hy ca t it me rvis ’ve ng w me I’m m n k ’s a for or got ith thi try er ana eep ll w wa gets . Ev all ng n ing be se ged h or ist re en the ew se en ven to im c th i ing ally thou inm e h se m d om t as her an gh pe issi im. ven onth o s ing lon sto gry an ne ng I f da s. o f h g ck as d t d. I in m eel l ys And or ere… as I . fr kin he wo y ike wh n ano I er om g m fir ke life som en ow, thse the ys st up sin e I c it’ e m b elf th th c th a s e a iscu . “W ing is e it ing n’t ga it f h I mo ha is in ac at d rn p?” to if id in r y th w g wi e g as ll n uy ev -


Coat_ Amy Pearson Trousers_Fran Dixon Barker



I’m part of his life as the guy from the coffee shop is part of mine. But unlike him, I’m not going to take away something, that does’t belong to me. This time I walked there faster then

ever. I bought a cookie and was about to go towards him… But he wasn’t there. There was just a little narcissus on the floor next to the mask he uses to cover his face.

Suddenly, I felt a hand on my shoulder and the voice behind me was saying,

“Thank you for your cookies…. and coffee”.


My heart dropped to my knees as if something started wriggling around and I’ve lost my balance. He was behind me - my biggest coffee shop secret. I turned around. Yes… It was the same smile that I used to see after I gave ether a cookie or a cup of coffee to the stranger. Suddenly I understood what’s happened with my life…Something that was ordinary that has become special.

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T-shirt & Trousers_ Meghan Weir



WOMEN



I’m on my way…It’s cold. Not easy on my own though… I wish I could go back to the day When loneliness was far away. When I was a sun and you were the orb of night… A day was mine And twilight was in your intention We both were full of flash contention… We thought we would share the world And make it brighter. But everything messed up When love became a fighter. Everything was over… The reason was a failure to accept That our feelings have never been in depth. And that our worlds were too far from one another. Because two orbits like us will never reach the Earth together. I wish I was a star… Today I am still on my way… It’s cold. Not easy on my own though.

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Fur Hood_Fran Dixon Barker



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Just go outside and stop in the middle. How many lives surround you now? Look at all of them and tell me who is the happiest? Is it a man who drove expensive cars and went to the bars where he bought all his friends with a shot of tequila? Is it a woman with a baby and loving man beside her? Yes, you are right. If your guess was the baby. That innocent creation who doesn’t know what it means to be like a King of Fear. Who doesn’t know his duties

in life yet and never faced a pressure to be something he is expected to be. But how long is he going to stay in this minority of happiness? How many birthday songs will have to be sang until he realises how full of fear and dictation the world is. The fear to not get what you want or to lose what you have already got. And his esteem will change for ever once he starts fighting for acceptance in the crowd.


But you don’t have to wait for it. You are surrounded by so many lives at the moment. Look at the boy. He has made it this far. You can tell who his father wants him to be - the football uniform says more than enough. All the strangers are passing them with a smile. A proud father with his perfect boy couldn’t cause any other reaction. Suddenly, the boy drops something from the bag whilst looking for his cap. A bunch of pencils that he was told to leave at home are now on the floor in a middle of the street. Father is not losing his control and quickly picks them up so people don’t see it. But you can tell he is nervous. And only he knows what life-teaching speech he is preparing in his head. And here you go - the first sign of fear appears in that little young face who has been told who he must be for the first time. The doubt in his ability to draw will be declared and salaries’ comparison between footballers and artists most likely will convince him to forget his inner desire to draw.


Blue & Red Unisex Jumpers_ Hena Iqbal



You may ask why the father is doing this? The answer is simple. Remember the first question? So, the father’s choice would be the man who got to drive cars and went to the bars as the happiest one in the crowd. And, of course, as he wishes all the best for his son he will do everything so his son becomes another “man”. Now take your pen and write down what you’ve learned: “If you want to be happy; learn how to recognise what happiness is”

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Editor in Chief Gintare Prialgauskaite

Designers

Amy Pearson Hena Iqbal Fran-Dixon Barker Jodi Worbey

Models

Dominyka Buc Martin Josefsson Eva Laura Valente Annlyse Lethinois

Special Thanks Hideto Omura Douglas Maclennan



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