Rift Valley Odyssey Bike Challenge

Several Muthaiga Members recently took on the Rift Valley Odyssey cycling challenge. Here one of them breathlessly peddles the upside of this long, gruelling ride (great views, clear air, being fit) and freewheels the downside (numb bum, lycra and - surprisingly - 'bonking').

If you share disdain for Mamils (middleaged men in lycra) and are even more despairing of Fosils (frighteningly old specimens in the same slinky stuff), then this might not be for you. On the other hand, if you have a mountain bike and are hankering for a challenge, then the Rift Valley Odyssey is worth thinking about.

In late September, several Muthaiga Members took part in the Rift Valley Odyssey, riding between six and ten hours a day for five days (there is a three-day version, but if you’re in for a penny then you might as well be in for a proverbial), and it was tough. All off-road, mostly on narrow tracks and remote paths, the route was never flat. But here’s the thing: it took us through some of the most outstandingly beautiful parts of Kenya, finding places and viewpoints that we would otherwise never have seen – and that’s why it’s recommended.

Climb and distance

This year, the route was about 450km. More intimidating, there were nearly 8km of hills to climb. That’s at least 1,500 metres of ascent every day, sometimes pushing bikes up through steep woods, sometimes slogging up long stretches of gradual incline. Still, what goes up also comes down and there were some thrilling sections, which those of less nervous disposition would hammer down at 60kph or more.

Training

Needs to be done, otherwise – as the blurb has it – the Odyssey will be an Ordeal. You’ll need to be riding between 10 and 15 hours a week before the event and, crucially, you should be accustomed to longer rides of at least four or five hours at a time. This particular fosil put in the hours but regretted not having practised longer stints because saddles can become bum-numbingly sore.

Pick your partner

For safety, you’re required to enter the Rift Valley Odyssey in teams of two or three. My partner was patient, practical, easy-natured, good company, and onethird my age; he fixed punctures, took pictures, stayed calm, poured beers, kept smiling. Other teams comprised either semi-professionals (people flew in from South Africa, Zimbabwe, England, even Alaska), geeks (turns out some people really know and care about bicycles), or enthusiasts who like a challenge. One competitor from the UK admitted to only recently having tried out a mountain bike; the wrong side of 60, living at sea-level, he loved the countryside, the companionship and the challenge. That’s the kind of hardy person you need in your team (he later admitted it was the hardest thing he’d ever done). In 2022 (the event has been going

for 12 years) no woman took part, which perhaps proves that ladies have good sense.

Lexicon

Leaving aside talk of derailleurs (which is French for ‘Don’t f*** with it’), cassettes, droppers and hydraulics (it’s only a bicycle for goodness’ sake!), your correspondent learned about bonking. Previously encountered as a fun recreational activity to be carried out whenever possible, it turns out to be a cycling term that means ‘hitting the wall’ – the moment when your legs simply can’t pedal any more. (The etymology is unsubtle but makes sense.) Still, the RVO is not a race and never will be. As our race official advised at the start, “If you’re not stopping to take pictures, then you’re the fool”. Viewpoints are ideal for bonking, providing an excuse to drop your bike and admire the scenery. Route – Limuru, Lake Naivasha, Mount Suswa, Loita Hills, Maji Moto, Maasai Mara. Day 1 - you start at Brackenhurst, climb 50-odd km through the Gatamaiyu Forest and southern tip of the Aberdares before descending another 40-something km through Hell’s Gate to Carnelleys in Naivasha. Day 2 - is shorter but arguably tougher as you head through Hell’s Gate up the Mau Escarpment and then double back to Mount Suswa where, fortunately, you no longer need to cycle to the rim. Local landowners find sweaty cyclists unsettling on the spirits and so we found ourselves in a small, seldom-used lodge, far from any beaten track. Day 3 - has 100km of rough and rocky bush tracks taking you to the confluence of the Seyapei and Ewaso Nyiro rivers, and onward to Maji Moto. Day 4 - another 100km eventually finds you in the Loita Hills. (We arrived in a basic camp in the back-of-beyond to be greeted by the Rusty Nail’s excellent team and treated to cold beer and delicious food.) And, at last, the final day sees you skirting the border with Tanzania as you ride through glorious rolling savannah to finish at the Instinct of the Mara luxury camp.

Highlights

Cyclists are a funny bunch – there were only about 20 of us – and some are genuinely amusing. So the company is good, the views are breathtaking, the dawn starts are magnificent, the air becomes clearer and cleaner than any Alpine breeze, you see places and peoples that you would otherwise never… and you will feel fit. Highly recommended.