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YOUR GUIDE TO FOSTERING
YOUR GUI DE TO FOS TERING
Contents 4 What Is Foster Care? 5 Why Did I Have To Be Fostered? 6 What Do Foster Carers Do? 7 Who Will Choose My Foster Carer? 8 Settling In 9 Money 10 House Rules 11 When Can I See My Family? 12 When Can I Go Home? 13 What If I Can’t Go Home? 14 Complaints And Your Rights 16 Is It Just Me? 18 What About School? 19 Who Decides What Happens To Me? 20 What Happens At A Review Meeting? 21 What Is A Care Plan? 22 What Is A Personal Education Plan? 23 What Is A Health Plan? 24 Will I Have To Go To A Court? 25 What If I Feel Sad Or Lonely? 26 Who Can I Talk To? 27 Get Involved 28 Other Organisations That Can Help You
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This booklet is your guide to being in foster care. It tells you what being in foster care means and how your foster carer will look after you. If you’re not sure about anything in the guide, please ask your foster carer or your social worker. Your foster carer and your social worker are there to make sure that you are safe and happy and to make plans for your future. They will talk to you about what is happening to you and will ask what
YOU
think and feel about everything.
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What Is Foster Care? Being in foster care is when you go to live with a foster family because for some reason you can’t live with your own family.
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Why Did I Have To Be Fostered? Young people are fostered for lots of different reasons. For example, your parents are too ill to look after you or you have been harmed or neglected in some way. Whatever the reason, social workers will have decided it is better for you not to live at home while they are trying to sort out the problems, but they will always try to see if there are other relatives or friends that can look after you before deciding to place you in foster care.
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Who Will Choose My Foster Carer?
Your social worker will ch oose a foster carer who they think is the best person to look after you and wh o you’ll be happy living with. If you are unhappy living with your foster carer, yo u need to talk to your socia l worker, but it’s worth waiting a bit to see if thi ngs get better. Ask your foster carer to tell you about th emselves
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Going to live with a foster carer can be a very difficult and confusing time. You might find it hard to settle with your foster family because you miss your family, but most children find that they come to like their foster family as they get to know them better.
SETTLING IN
If you are finding it hard to get on with your foster family:
Try talking to them first, and tell them how you feel.
See if you can agree on some changes that will make life better.
If you have tried talking about it and you still feel you really don’t get on with your foster family, this will be taken on board when plans are made for your future. So make sure you talk to your social worker about how you’re feeling. 8
Talk to your social worker about it as they will be able to help you and your foster carer talk through any problems.
MONEY Foster carers get an allowance from Camden to look after you. This allowance is for your food, clothing, personal care, activities and pocket money. If you are aged between 11 and 16, your foster carer will get £65 a week for clothing and personal care for you and £25 a week for activities and pocket money. Young people should meet with their foster carer and social worker to decide how this money should be spent, and how much they should be given to spend themselves. Learning to manage money is an important part of becoming independent, so this is a good time to start. If you don’t spend all your pocket money, you can ask your foster carer about opening a savings account.
What has been agreed about how much of your pocket money should be given to you?
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House rules All families are different and have different rules, and your foster family will have rules about things. The best thing to do is: Find out from your foster carer what their house rules are. They’ll be happy to explain the rules as it means it’s easier for you to settle in if you know what’s expected of you. Remember that rules in foster families are there to protect you. Examples of rules are times to come home, looking after your room, going to school or college, helping out in the house, not using drugs or alcohol and respecting other races, religions and cultures. If the house rules are different from what you’re used to, or you don’t like them, tell your foster carer. By talking to them, you can try to reach an agreement that will make things easier for everyone. If you break a really important house rule, like not coming back when you are expected, your foster carer may have to discipline you. Foster carers aren’t allowed to use physical punishment, but they can stop privileges like pocket money or going out. You need to talk to your foster carer about things like how late you can stay out and try to reach an agreement with them. What are the house rules where you live?
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When can I see my family? Your social worker will help you to keep in touch with your family. If there are people you want to see, like grandparents or friends, tell your foster carer or social worker and they will try to make arrangements. Keeping in contact with your family can sometimes be upsetting but if everyone agrees that it is good for you to see them and you want to, you will be able to. If you don’t want to see your family, you can probably stay in touch by telephone, letters or email. Your social worker and foster carer will help you with this. 11
Write down all the people you want to have contact with . . .
You may want to tell your social worker the next time you meet.
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When can I go home? It depends on the reasons you are in foster care. You could be in foster care for one night, a few weeks or several months. Your social worker will need to be sure that it is safe for you to return and will work together with your parents and family to make this happen. If everyone agrees that you can go home, plans will be made for you to return.
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What if I can’t go home? Sometimes the problems at home are so difficult that young people cannot return home. Your social worker will find you foster carers who can look after you as part of a family for the long term and will try to find a family that is similar to your own culture, ethnicity and religion so that you feel comfortable and can settle. If you find it too difficult to live as part of a foster family, your social worker will think about what other kind of placement would be best for you.
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Complaints and your rights If you are really unhappy about where you are living or anything else to do with your care, you should talk to your foster carer or social worker first to see if they can sort out the problem, but if they can’t, ask your social worker about making a complaint. Your social worker will arrange for you to talk to an independent advocate – this is someone who speaks up for you but who does not work for the Council. You can also ask to speak to your social worker’s manager. Your complaint will be sent to the Children’s Complaints Officer, and they will work with you, your social worker and your advocate to sort out any problems. If your social worker makes a complaint for you but you don’t think it was taken seriously enough, you can make a complaint yourself by writing to The Commission for Social Care, which is an organisation that checks the work of fostering agencies. The Commission for Social Care 33 Greycoat Street London SW1 2QF www.csci.org.uk
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Is It Just
Me? There are many famous people who have been fostered Pierce Brosnan - aka James Bond 007
Oprah Winfrey – Chat show ho
Ice-T – Rappe
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40,000
children and young people At least in the UK are in foster care, so you are not the only one. Research shows that one in three people has some connection to fostering – that’s about 20 million people! If you want more information about being fostered, or you’re being bullied or teased because you are in foster care and you want to find out how to deal with it, you can: Read books about being fostered like ‘The Story Of Tracy Beaker’. Check out websites like the ones listed at the end of this guide. Call helplines like Childline to talk to someone about it – the numbers are also listed at the end of this guide. If you’re being bullied or teased because you’re in foster care, make sure you tell someone about it so they can help stop it. Remember, there is nothing strange or wrong about being fostered and it’s a lot more common than many people realise. What helplines or websites have you used that you would tell other looked after young people about?
ost in the USA
er and actor
Goldie – Musican and actor Kathy Burke – Actor and director
Malcolm X – Black civil rights activist in the USA . . . and many, many more . . .
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What about school? If you can stay at the same school, your social worker will sort out how you will get from your foster home to school and back each day. If it’s not possible, your social worker will help find another school for you. Changing schools can be stressful, so make sure you tell your foster carer and social worker if you have any worries or if anyone is bullying you, or you just need to talk about it. Your school will have a ‘designated teacher’ whose job it is to help you sort out any problems you might have. Make sure you know who they are and speak to them about any problems or worries – it’s their job to help you.
My designated teacher is
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Who decides what happens to me? You, your parents, your foster carer and your social worker will go to review meetings to decide on the plans for you while you are in care. You will have a say in who you want invited to these meetings (you might like your teacher to attend, for example) and everyone has to listen to what you want. Sometimes it might feel like other people are making all the decisions, but they are there to try to help you, so it’s a good idea to work with them. If you don’t feel comfortable talking in a meeting about what you want or how you feel, talk to your social worker and they will explain to everyone else. Or you can get an independent advocate.
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What happens at a review meeting? The review meeting gives you a chance to talk about what has happened in the past, what is happening now, and what should happen in the future. You will also be able to talk about school, your health, contact with your family and friends and your hobbies and interests. From this, your care plan will be decided. Your first review meeting will happen when you have been in foster care for one month. The next one will be in three months, and then they will happen every six months. For more information about your review meeting and care plan, ask your social worker for a copy of The Review Meeting cdrom. It was made by a group of young people who are looked after and explains what the review meeting is about.
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What is a care plan? Your care plan explains what will happen while you are in foster care and the plans for your future. It also has information on: How long you will live with your foster carer. This may only be for a short time (a short-term placement) or you may stay there for a while (a long-term placement). What arrangements have been made for your education, your health and family contact. The care plan will be updated at each review meeting, so if you’re not happy with something, make sure you say so at the meeting, or get your social worker or independent advocate to.
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What is a personal education plan? While you are Looked After by Camden, you will have your own Personal Education Plan (PEP). This is a plan that sets targets for your learning and lists who will do what to help you reach your targets.
The PEP will be written at school with you and your teacher, the designated teacher, your foster carer and (if possible) your parents present. Your education is important and your foster carer and social worker will support you to do well. Most foster homes have a computer to help you with your school work.
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W
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When you move in with your foster family, you’ll see a doctor for a check-up. If the doctor says you need any treatment, this will be explained in your health plan. If you do have any health problems, don’t worry. Your foster carers will be able to help you get the right treatment. 23
Will I have to go to a court? Sometimes Camden might have very serious concerns about you returning to live at home and will not think that you should. If your parents disagree and want you to go home, your social worker will have to go to court so that a judge can decide. You will not have to go there yourself, as people like your social worker and a court social worker called a Children’s Guardian will talk to the judge for you. It is important that you let them know how you feel, and ask them what the judge has decided, so that you understand what is happening.
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What if I feel sad or lonely? Sometimes you may feel so bad about things that you have to let it out. There are good ways to do this such as:
talking to a friend listening to or making music writing a journal There are some not so good ways like: yelling at someone smashing things drinking or taking drugs These don’t help to make the situation better. The best way is to find a positive way to help you work through your feelings and deal with things. Talking to someone about how you feel won’t always make the feelings go away but it will make you feel better, and it will help other people to understand you better.
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Who can I talk to? There are lots of people you can talk to about how you’re feeling, such as your foster carer, your social worker, your friends, your family or a teacher. There are also special phone lines where you can call to talk to someone about how you’re feeling. They can give advice on all kinds of things. They are confidential, and are free to call – check out the ones listed at the end of this leaflet. By talking things through, you’ll not only feel better, you’ll also help people to understand you better. And by listening to their point of view as well, you can all work together to find ways to make life easier. There are lots of people who want to help you, so make sure you talk to them! Your social worker or foster carer can arrange this. Who do you talk to when you feel unhappy?
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What if I’m not happy? If you think something is wrong and not fair, you can get in touch with our complaints team. They are there to put things right for you and will find you an advocate. You can call them free on
0800 393 561 or write to them at:
Children, Schools and Families FREEPOST NW 413 London NW1 9ES
Get involved Camden has a Participation Officer who runs a young person’s consultation forum. The forum will give you the chance to meet up with other young people in Camden, some whom may be fostered like you. The forum lets you talk about things that are important to young people, and the Participation Officer makes sure the Council are listening. This helps the Council to make services for young people better. Ask your social worker about how to join the forum. 27
Other organisations that can help you There are lots of organisations that can help you while you’re in foster care. Some of them have phone lines you can call if you want to talk to someone about how you’re feeling, and some of them have websites with games and information. Check out some of these organisations:
Carezone This is a safe, interactive website for children and young people who are looked after. It has lots of information, competitions, and a chat room where you can chat to other young people who are looked after. www.czworld.org
Who Cares Trust The Who Cares Trust has a website for young people called Oi ! www.rhrn.thewhocarestrust.org.uk/wct/ user/oi with lots of information and advice on being in foster care.
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ChildLine ChildLine run a 24-hour helpline for you to talk about any problem, day or night – phone them free on 0800 1111. They also have a website www.childline.org.uk, which has a special section to help you deal with things like bullying.
NSPCC Call the NSPCC’s free 24-hour helpline on 0800 800 500 to talk about any kind of problem. You can also email help@nspcc.org.uk for advice and they will reply within 24 hours. Or you can visit www.worriedneed2talk.org.uk, the NSPCC’s site for young people, which includes lots of info about all sorts of problems.
National Youth Advocacy Service For free advice and info for young people, including free legal advice, you can call 0800 61 61 01, visit www.nyas.net or email help@nyas.net They will also send an independent advocate (someone who is not connected with Camden) to court and meetings to speak for you or to help you make a complaint.
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Voice You can call free on 0800 800 5792 or email them at info@vcc-uk.org if you would like an independent advocate to help you make a complaint or to speak for you in meetings or at court.
Carelaw www.carelaw.org.uk has lots of information for young people in foster care about your rights and what happens when you leave care.
Children’s Rights Director If you want to talk to someone about a problem you have, or about something you think is a big worry to other young people, or if there is a change you think should be made for young people, or you have a story that you think other people would like to hear, you can talk to the Children’s Rights Director. His job is to find out what young people and children think about living away from home or getting social services. He has to make sure that you are listened to and that your rights are respected. You can contact the Director in writing, by email or by phone. The Office of the Children’s Rights Director St Nicholas Building St Nicholas Street Newcastle upon Tyne NE1 1NB Freephone number 0800 528 0731 www.right4me.org.uk 30
These organisations can help you find an independent advocate:
Voice Of The Child In Care Free phone: 0808 800 5792 Email: info@vcc-uki.org
National Youth Advocacy Service Free phone 0800 616 101 Telephone 0151 649 8700
Children’s Legal Centre Telephone 01206 873 820 www.childrenlegalcentre.com
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