Issue II Journalists
Zahra Khan Jack Sargent Joseph Caulfield Nina Ramaswamy Hannes Holemans Bartosz Kubiak Verna Lukka Milana Yandieva Fiachra Kelleher Niamh Fitzgerald Editors Nora Jekabsone Gregor Bauer
EDITORIAL Dear delegates,
the session has come to its conclusion, but your engament in, perhaps addiction to EYP has only begun. We have gone far beyond the morning ritual of a day’s dainty dish, we are now feasting on our new experience with all the passion and glory of a tuna sandwich! We, as the whole Media Team, must thank you with sincerest gratitude for participating in our activities, from dancing, over coffee break polls, to simply looking great, you have helped us a great deal in covering the session. Most importantly, you made this weekend fun, you made our work as enjoyable as can be, you turned this weekend into a fantabulous event. We hope that you enjoyed the session at least half as much as we did and present to you the second and farewell issue of our team. Yours, Nora and Gregor
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CONTENT Ingrid the bad advice delegate......................................4-5 EYP Insights....................................................................6-7 The Life of a Humanitarian Worker.................................8 The Plane Crash..................................................................9 Smile!.................................................................................10 Three types of delegates.............................................11-12 Unnecessary Rhyming.....................................................13 Taut as a bowstring.....................................................16-17 Meet your Chair..........................................................18-19 Anonymous Compliments........................................20-21 Coffee Break Haikus........................................................22 A beginner’s guide to PED........................................26-27
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Ingrid
the bad advice delegate I
n preparing for GA, we caught up with our most notorious delegate, Ingrid Incognitus, in order to get a few hints and tips. Study them closely and you might some day end up as successful as some other past-EYPers, including John Green, Nina Simone and Michael Flatley.
1. 2.
3. 4.
Politeness is a sign of weakness. Beware of constructive feedback while speaking at GA. The best delegates only ever contribute negatively to other committee’s resolutions. Offering a solution to a problem will not give a good impression. Never hesitate to lie, cheat, steal, mock others, swear, jeer, catcall, or chew with your mouth open.
Common courtesy dictates that you put your phone on the Outdoor profile when in GA, it would be extremely rude if you were to miss a call.
5. 6. 7. 8. 9. 10.
Stay hydrated. Just ask your chair for an alcoholic beverage. Toilets are so mainstream.
Your chainmail, mace, and crossbow must be in perfect working order for GA. Jousting is also allowed (and encouraged). It is important to prioritise; it does not matter so much what you say, rather how good you look when you are saying it. Observe the dress code: Spandex and bandanas are the basics, togas and crocs for the adventurous. Always appear disinterested while other committees are presenting their resolutions. Maintaining casual conversation with a fellow
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committee member is sure to undermine the confidence of a speaker, and a relaxed, blasé attitude will convince them that you have a sound resolution of your own.
11. 12. 13. 14. 15. 16. 17. 18. 19.
Cocky is the new confident. Make sure you remember your fireworks for GA this year, we wouldn’t want you embarrassing yourself. Please note, rhyme is the essence of great speech writing. Introductory clauses go at the end of your resolution, just before the advertisements page. Writing your resolution in the blood of your enemies is a really great way to show your commitment to the cause. Pets are welcome. Animal sacrifice is a big part of EYP culture. Keep tweeting the session hashtag! #LeinsterRS15
Use cute nicknames and abbreviations like “my reso,” “general assemblo,” “multiculto,” “govno,” and “disco” to make your resolution more relatable and hip.
20. 21. 22. 23. 24.
Peckish? Post-its make a lovely snack. You can buy extra speaking time with air fresheners. If a delegate you fancy criticises your resolution, it is a sign that they want you to ask them on a date. Yes, the reading of introductory clauses is an acceptable time for flanter. And a further yes, a rooftop selfie is exactly what your resolution needed.
Fiachra Kelleher (IE) 5
EYP Insights S o you are coming to terms with your EYP experience, you survived the watershed moment of big team building; from surprisingly nimble big fat ponies, to the trials and tribulations of the anonymous Aley-ley. You have resurfaced after the plunge off the deep end. Perhaps you are even feeling confident.
To help this newfound sense of understanding, we have decided to expose the human side of the officials team, through an exploration of their unique qualities. To start this journey into the human dimension of the people that hold the session together, I will begin with arguably the most important of them all; our President, Lucy Bradfield. The most senior official is hugely cultured. Ms. Brad6| Munsters Regional Session 2015
field is able to speak five languages to high degrees of fluency, and previously has lived on the continent, in Italy for a year. In addition to being quite the polyglot, Lucy is able to say the alphabet backwards in an EYP record setting time of under five seconds. It is now time to discuss the quirks of the hard working resident Editor and Editress; Gregor and Nora. The former is a professional actor, featuring extensively on Czech TV as well as participating in numerous ensembles where he showcases his interest in percussion instruments. The latter, however is equally unique. She is the caring owner of Bruno, a fifteen year old turtle who is the size of [her] head. Aside from latent honesty, Nora is also a hero. She apprehend-
ed a toy store thief and likely saved Christmas in the process. Nora enjoys the simple pleasures in life, namely the graffiti painting of a unicorn simultaneously eating cupcakes and regurgitating rainbows, that adorns her bedroom. Last but not least, are the Journos and Organisers, who ensure the running and vitality of the session. For this, Journalist Joseph Caulfield and Orga Tom Cantillon gladly volunteered. My colleague Joseph is quite the human contortionist, being able to move his shoulder blades into seemingly impossible positions. Additional unique qualities include a predilection for the number four, arising out of its prominence in shapes as well as serious musical talent. Tom on the other
hand, names his veritable menagerie of pets in alphabetical order; ranging from Alfie the dog, to Esmerelda the goldfish. Aside from this, he is also quite possibly immortal, having narrowly avoided being run over by a bus in Times Square. Last but not least, is the humorous Chair Ben English, who is quite unique himself. He is a firm believer that Alexander Bell invented the phone to call him specifically. Additionally he has also given an attack speech on the wrong committee, only realising when he had finished said speech. Lastly he also considers himself to be a comedian, exercising his wit with topical jokes; slyly telling people to Crimea river.
Jack Sargent (IE) 7
The Life of a Humanitarian Worker
W
hat is it that drives humanitarian workers to put themselves aside and risk everything for someone else? Well for starters it is definitely not for the honour or satisfaction they would receive by helping others, cause it is actually quite the opposite. People often forget the downside of humanitarian work: being consistently in contact with war, sickness, poverty and other tragic situations, without nearly any time to rest, takes its toll on anyone. Studies have found that around 80% of aid workers experience distress symptoms, and that 3-7% suffer to an extent that interferes with their duties. So even the ones who manage to fulfill their mission physically unharmed, have to undergo a recovery process. So then what does drive them? Well of course the previous mentioned arguments play their parts, but the real thing that keeps these people going is very simple: they want to help people who are in trouble; because they
have the right to live free of the risks associated with disasters, both natural and man-made. And even though this is a very common feeling among Europeans these days, it takes a lot of courage and effort to actually go do these kind of things. Since in general people will not intentionally hurt themselves in order to help others, when that is in fact what humanitarian workers choose for. Taking all of this in consideration, we can but conclude that it is a path walked on by a handful of people; who need our support to continue this work. Because it is only through these people that the situation can improve! There are of course different ways to support these people, two of many examples are: the creation of communities consisting of people in similar situation and, improving the local accommodations and schedules so they might actually have some time to theirselves.
Hannes Holemans (BE) 8| Munsters Regional Session 2015
I
The P ane Crash
t is the scene from your worst nightmare: You are trying to sleep on a long flight. The plane sudden turbulence snaps you awake. There is a loud bang and the cabin lights flicker, you feel the plane start to descend. The pilot buzzes over the intercom that a plane engine has failed and you are going to have to make a crash landing. It is unthinkable for us, but that is the situation that the unfortunate 13 members of DEVE 1 had to deal with on Friday the sixth of February. The plane descending rapidly, the pilot sought the council of DEVE 1. Who else would have the reasoning and cooperation necessary to deal with the conundrum he faced? He gathered them in the cockpit and explained that the emergency supplies on board were making the plane too heavy for asuccessful landing on a nearby abandoned island: They would need to jettison some of the supplies. But how does one compromise the essential? The team set too it, time was of the essence. James, nervous, quickly proposed the utility of the magnifying glass.
Eimear, cool and collected despite the danger remarked that the pen and paper there were useless. Cathal, the logistical mastermind pointed out the blankets could keep them warm and clean water. They operate quickly and narrow the list to five items: emergency provisions, blankets, rope, a magnifying glass and signal flares. However disaster strikes again, another turbine bursts into flames and the island can be seen approaching the plane. More weight must be lost and the surprisingly heavy flares and rope are discarded to compensate. The pilot gives the controls a final heave as the plane screeches into the sand of the desert island. Its momentum shatters the wings and tears the hull, but eventually the plane judders to a stop. The plane is beyond repair and the people inside are thoroughly shaken but miraculously uninjured. The sand settles around the plane as the committee consider their outlook. That morning they had been afraid of the tedium of the flight, now it seems that the ordeal has just begun.
Joseph Caulfield (IE) 9
SMILE! W
ithin a millisecond of producing a camera, we are often hit with choruses of protests, proclamations of “I look awful!”, and fierce demands to “put it away immediately!” as if a lightweight machine gun was being brandished under their noses, or a click of the camera would act as a bomb trigger mechanic. Covering their hands with their faces, desperately avoiding eye contact with the camera lens as if Medusa herself flickers within the red light, these are the pictures that I often find myself taking. Instead, flash a big smile, a silly pose, or simply just jump at the chance to have yourself in the present day, immortalised. Photographs capture an ephemeral moment, and make it permanent. A fantastic chance to solidify memories, much like Dumbledore’s Pensieve, but a far more muggle opportunity to revive stored memories. Pictures are very
real, tangible, moments that we have a wonderful opportunity to cherish forever. They catalogue parts of ourself, adventures we’ve been on, and people and places we have seen, they function so that we can look back upon them years from now and they could remind us of a time that we might have forgotten. They help us share, and communicate far more effectively and quicker than anything we could say. So do not shy away from the camera, give the media team a big old smile and help keep your fond new EYP memories immortalised. No more ducking, or hiding or turning around, leave a legacy worth thousands of words behind in the form of photographs. (Do not forget to post your selfies, photos and snapchats under the hashtag #MunsterRS15 and share your moments with everybody!)
Zahra Khan (IE) 10| Munsters Regional Session 2015
THE THREE TYPES OF DELEGATES
T
omorrow, the session will come to its end in the form of the General Assembly. As it is somewhat new and maybe a bit unnerving, the Media Team will try and predict your experience for you, so you can avoid making the most common mistakes and actually enjoy your first ever EYP session to the fullest. Are you the one to sleep your way through GA, or will you stay up all night writing your defence speech? Will you be the one hogging all the floor points, or the one pinning questionable post-its to your friends’ backs? Take this quiz and find out!
1. A) B) C)
What was the first thing you packed for the session? Pyjamas in the hope you actually get to use them. Party dress for the disco. iPad for taking notes.
2. A) B) C)
What are you like in the mornings? Sleep through breakfast and end up having to run to catch the bus. Wake up early to have a shower, straighten your hair and do your make-up. Crawl out of your room to get coffee after a sleepless night spent working.
3. A) B) C)
Where in Europe would you like to travel next? Sweden. Nature, peace and quiet. Spain. Lovely, sunny beaches and great parties. Brussels in Belgium. Important people and a busy atmosphere.
4. A) B) C)
Pick the song that best describes you Robbie Williams - Feel Chainsmokers – #SELFIE Imagine Dragons – Warrior
5. A) B) C)
Pick your favourite colour. White. Neutral and calming. Pink. Sweet and energetic. Blue. Official and respectable.
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6. What is your favourite part of the session? A) Teambuilding. At least that ends early enough for you to get a good night’s sleep. B) Coffee breaks where you get to socialise. C) General assembly where you get to show off your knowledge and great debating skills. 7. A) B) C)
How would your fellow delegates describe you? The quiet one with good points. The loud, mood-boosting one. The one leading the discussion.
Now, count what your most common answer was and read the tips below! Mostly A answers: The sleepy delegate You are the calming component of your committee. You like to observe others working, but contribute to the discussion with some really good, thoughtthrough comments. Make sure to drink loads of coffee before the GA to stay awake and energetic in order to get the chance to share your great points with everyone else. Mostly B answers: The fun-loving delegate. You are the one to cheer up your committee with your loud and radiant personality. You thrive in all the more social parts of the sessions, but remember to try and get some rest before the GA. Remember that even the more academic parts can be great fun if you concentrate enough to listen and contribute to the debates. Mostly C answers: The super delegate. You are the one that keeps the discussions going with your clever comments and good background knowledge. In the GA, you are probably ready to fight tooth and nail to pass your committee’s resolution, but keep in mind that EYP is all about teamwork and not just speeches and debates. Kick back and relax and give yourself the chance to enjoy the session and the people around you, unfortunately it will all be over sooner than any of us would like!
Verna Lukka (FI) 12| Munsters Regional Session 2015
UNNECESSARY RHYMING The rifled paper of the coffee cups Is difficult to write your name upon. The lack of Mount Mercy College maps Makes getting lost a regular phenomenon. The Jesus statues are surrounding us And leading through a yellow corridor. The photos on the walls are not precarious But saviours from drag of draining bore. The loud roaring of excited delegates Would scare off a random Irishman. The chairs‘ confidence, however, truly elevates How rapidly the session’s turning into caravan. The coffee breaks have sandwiches of proper flavours – Egg salad, tuna with sweet corn and ham. The organisers do all of us cute favours – Make tea and coffee, clean, put music and not cram. The Munster Regional is running until Sunday evening While memories last longer – EYP cliché. The people haven‘t even thought about leaving But know that any arguments against are not touché.
Milana Yandieva (RU) 13
Draw your chair Draw your chair submitted drawings
Draw your chair Draw your chair
Draw your chair
Draw your chair
Draw your chair Draw your chair
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Draw your chair
Draw Lucy
Draw Lucy
Draw Lucy Draw Lucy
Draw Lucy Draw Lucy
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Taut as a bowstring
P
ounding heartbeat, sweaty hands and feeling faint. When speaking in front of a crowd, like most of us will be in the General Assembly tomorrow, some people get the same symptoms as when preparing for a battle for life and death. Getting nervous before speaking in front of a crowd is absolutely normal and usually positive performance booster. Some of us, however, have a tendency to become overly stressed before and during performing to the public. Those suffering from this condition often feel like they and their ideas are not appreciated by the others, and cannot focus on other than themselves 16| Munsters Regional Session 2015
and their stress when waiting for their turn. Whether they are familiar with the crowd is often not relevant; these ‘stresser-types’ can get sweaty palms and palpitations even when presenting a point to their fellow delegates, for example. Extreme performance anxiety, or ‘stage fever’, is an abnormally strong reaction to the nervousness caused by performing. This condition needs no other encouragement than a simple thought along the lines of ‘I’m a bad performer’, ‘the audience will not appreciate what I have to say’ or ‘I fail every time I perform’. This kind of anxiety can stem for just one former failure. Temper, previous experiences and
how you were raised can also affect your feelings towards speaking in public, so we are all different in that sense. For an extreme stresser-type performing, such as giving a speech or taking floor points, can feel like a battle. Stress, after all, is an automatic reaction to a situation we see as life-threatening, whether that really is the case or not. Performing to a crowd is obviously not dangerous, but many of us still react the same. For one suffering from performance anxiety it is impossible to relax and focus before the performance due to high adrenaline levels in blood. Fortunately, there are many ways to ease performance anxiety. Being well-prepared and having your
notes written down is a good start. It is good to remember that performing tends to get easier once you gain more experience in it, so if you think you stress performing a lot, you should try and challenge yourself by performing more, for example by taking a round of floor points in GA where you get to speak standing up from your. Last but not least, there is no shame in admitting to your audience that you are nervous. In the end it is important for someone who gets performance anxiety to try and form a new mentality towards performing. Nobody is ever perfect, so you should not be too hard on yourself either. Accept that you make mistakes and sometimes fail, and performing will become noticeably easier.
Verna Lukka (FI) 17
DEVEIIDEVEIIIEMPLENVIIENVIIINTAITRALIBEAFETAFCO
MEET YOUR CHAIR
Did you know that Julia has never seen Lord of the Rings, and Stan is in favour of wearing onesies during the General Assembly? The Media Team asked the Chairs some questions to reveal their real side – apparently, half of them are Iron Man wannabes.
What is your favourite hol- into really interestig topics quickly. If you could be one superiday destination? Jack – DEVE I hero, who would you pick? Bretanny, France. It is nice and quiet, and I like French girls. James – ENVI 2 Vietnam, because I love strange food.
What do you think about tinder?
Yannick – DEVE 2 Tinder gets hilarious if you will get someone else’s phone. However, one cannot say anything intelligent about it. Jack – DEVE I I like tinder, it gets straight to the point. Leo - EMPL I love tinder, because you can get
Nick – ITRE Spider-Man, because he always wins. Claudia – INTA Spider-Man, because I hate spiders and love men. Katie – ITRE Iron man, because I’m an engineer. David - AFCO Iron man - because he is rich and he is also an amazing genius. Stan – DEVE 3 Night Crawler - he’s got teleport and it would make attending Irish sessions easier as I am a lazy man. Harry Potter or Lord of the Rings? Varvara – ENVI 2 Definitely LOTR. It’s my favourite book and movie. I prefer hobbits to magicians.
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Munsters Regional Session 2015 I18| EV EDTEFA OCFA EBILARTIATNIIIVNEIIV
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Sophie – AFCO HP, because I grew up as a magician. Kate – DEVE 1 HP - the books were more relatable, also I am not of the size of the hobbit. Julia – DEVE 3 HP – I have never seen LOTR because I always fall asleep watching it.
If you could pick one person to be with you on the lonely island, why would it be your co-chair?
Michael – INTA We would have so much fun that I would forget that we are on the lonely island Julia – DEVE 3 He is the funnest person ever, we are the best team.
Is it true that Swedish people dress up in IKEA?
Karolina – ENVI 1 Yes of course, you look so fancy matching with the furniture.
Who would you like to be in 5 years time?
Andrew – LIBE An astronaut, because I would like to check how is it to drink in the space.
Why the introduction of onesies into the GA dress code would be a good idea?
Brendan – ENVI 1 Never before such a faux pas has been committed. Stanford – DEVE 3 There is a productive reasoning behind onesies - when you are comfortable you come up with better ideas. Personally, I have best ideas when lying in my onesie on a sofa.
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These are the some of the best compliments from our
Anonymous Compliments Box!
„Orlaith is like the Statue of Liberty – she gives great advice” „Madeline, love your lipstick!” „Norma O’Sullivan is the nicest, most genuine person I‘ve ever met and has the prettiest blue eyes” „Reidin looks like a TOPSHOP worker”
„LUCY IS THE LOVELIEST PERSON” „Shirley Carr, always admired you, thanks for bringing Diverbo and EYP into my life. Always an inspiration”
„Conall from EMPL has such a quiet confidence, v. funny guy” „Emma, you’re the luminous lady to my dancing panda”
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„Casey is fair sound, so funny and we both love food!”
„Beth: Really deep mind” „Sean is really quiet but he has amazing opinions. He’s a cutie pie” „Alison from LIBE is So outgoing and friendly. She‘s lovely”
„Sarah Ryan is my spirit animal, always doing her thing and being amazing” „ZoDo, wake me up before you go go!”
„Jaqueline McCarthy; The most stunningly beautiful person ever. When she is in the room, she is the only person, thing I see. Everyone else and everything else is a blur. She has a beautiful mind and a beautiful spirit. You make me a better person, my love.”
„Aisling O’Driscoll is genuinely the loveliest person ever. She‘s like the Holy Mary… but Aisling.” 21
coffee break haikus
Is there still coffee Don’t care if it is not hot I am hot enough
Wait, what. No Cookies You got to be kidding me the EMPL kid ate them
Finally a break CW did get on my nerves People talk too much
Nina Ramaswamy (NE) 22| Munsters Regional Session 2015
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The patient orange goes chin to chin, The session hijinks are soon to begin
The day begins A flurry of pens. Coffee and ties, The play time ends
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The hall light fades With the sinking sun. Resolutions presented Our session is done. photo by Verna Lukka (FI), written by Joseph Caulfield 25
PED A beginner’s guide to
Post-EYP Depression
S
o you have finally made it through your session. All the games, discussions, points of debate and exuberant “Just Dance” routines are finished and you can finally go home. A full meal, a warm bed, life’s pleasures that you have missed while debating European politics. For some it is your first session, however, seasoned EYPers are aware that you are not quite done with your EYP experience just yet. Before you can readjust to the real world again you have to transition through the doldrums of post EYP depression, what we in the busi-
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ness call “PED”. So here in the media cave we have compiled our list of top tips to help you get through it and out the other side. -Facebook: As always, the perfect tool to keep in touch with new friends. Add to that the Munster session Facebook page and you have a two in one combo for PED. Whether it’s catching up on the published articles or finding the perfect profiler; the grand media masters Nora and Gregor have got you covered with the Munsters 2015 page.
-Chocolate: Mr Cadbury, you may not be helping the endeavour of a healthy lifestyle but you make a mean chocolate bar. When it comes to cheering up you could not beat chocolate with a big stick. -Transition year coordinator: The end of the session means one thing: Back to school. Without those resolutions to write its back to the nine to four slog. However for those lucky enough to be in 4th year there are plenty of opportunities to get out of it, which is where your TY co-ordinator comes in. Casually offer to help with any jobs that need to be done and you can earn yourself a day of relaxing in the office, safe from the influences of Heaney, NĂ Grada and Pythagoras.
-Reunions: Meeting all those great people again is the best means of getting through the blues. Plan reunions, in EYP style if possible. Theres a lot to be said for just throwing on a suit getting some coffee and assembling in a random school hall. Follow those steps and you’ll be sure to get the EYP zip back in your step. Regular life can be boring without the odd game of ninja, which is why you should always try and throw the odd energiser into your daily life. Hopefully you have all had a great session, apply again next year lads!
Joseph Caulfield (IE) 27
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