Chicago-Maroon-10-10-26

CHICAGO

MAROON The student newspaper of the University of Chicago since 1892

Round-up of the day NEWS, p. 2

TUESDAY, OCTOBER 26, 2010 • VOLUME 122, ISSUE 9 • CHICAGOMAROON.COM

OBITUARY

ADMINISTRATION

Memorial celebrates Div School's Browning

Stimulus ends, but work-study still strong The U of C watches funding rise, even as work-study dollars plummet nationwide

By Jonathan Lai News Staff

Professor and minister Don Browning bridged religion, philosophy, psychology, and the law. He died at 76.

COURTESY OF THE UNIVERSITY OF CHICAGO NEWS OFFICE

By Sara Hupp News Contributor Family, friends, former colleagues and students of the Divinity School’s Don S. Browning (BD '59, AM ‘62, PhD ‘64) gathered on Saturday to honor Browning’s life at a memorial service in Bond Chapel.

Browning died of cancer in his Hyde Park home on June 3 at the age of 76.

An ordained minister and a Divinity School professor of religion and ethics for 37 years,

Browning was known for making the academic study of religion more accessible by studying how religion and real life intersect in issues like marriage and psychology. His academic work branched into several fields, including religion, philosophy, psychology, and law.

“He had an amazingly capacious mind that could see how religious and moral questions need to be explored from a variety of vantage points,” said Divinity School Professor William Schweiker, according to a June 8

University News Office obituary.

“He could pinpoint the strength and weakness of an argument and indicate this in a forceful, but gentle way.”

Browning was dean of the Disciples Divinity House from 1977 to 1983, and authored three books.

Browning made a lasting impact on those around him both as a Divinity School student—he received all his degrees from the school—and as a professor, according to those who spoke at

BROWNING continued on page 3

The DREAM Act: Hip-hoppers break it down Workshop raises awareness on campus immigration issues

Rebel Diaz, a Chicago-based political hip-hop trio, gave a performance on “Hip-Hop and Immigration,” as part of a workshop on the D R EAM Act last Friday at 5710 Woodlawn.

The DREAM Act, which has yet to be passed in Congress, would offer undocumented students in good standing a path to conditional permanent residency.

It recently became a nationwide campus issue due in part to a provision that undocumented students would need to attend a four-year institution of higher education to be considered eligible.

Rebel Diaz, which consists of brothers RodStarz, La Tere (not present at this performance), and G1, threw down songs about injustice and political resistance before discussing hip-hop from a historical perspective.

“I thought the workshop was informative. It showcased the immigration movement from a different lens,” said second-year Noemi Garcia, a member of the Organization of Latin American Students.

Hip-hop has moved hand-inhand with immigration, Rebel Diaz said, getting involved in issues ranging from the DREAM Act to border security. The group wanted to raise awareness about immigration issues on campus after confusion among both students and the administration on the University’s policy.

Th e U o f C C o a l i t i o n f o r Immigration Rights (U C C I R), which helped sponsor the workshop, petitioned the University last spring to endorse the DREAM Act. Presidents at other universities, including Harvard, Princeton, and Yale, have publicly supported the act.

The University has not given a

statement on the DREAM ACT, citing the Kalven Report, which dictates political neutrality on such issues.

But earlier this month the administration clarified the policy on undocumented students in a meeting with UCCIR and through a press release, stating that the University admits undocumented students and provides them with private financial aid funding.

Although the administration did not make a statement on the DREAM Act itself, UCC I R said they were pleased with the statement that was issued and understood the rationale behind the administration’s reading of the Kalven Report as it applies to undocumented students.

Re b e l D i a z w a s b r o u g h t t o campus “in order to create an environment for students to discuss openly and safely issues regarding the DREAM Act and immigration issues in general,” Garcia said.

WORK-STUDY continued on page 4

HYDE PARK

Burns eschews appointment, angles for votes

By Ella Christoph News Editor

CAMPUS LIFE

By Danny Rosa News Contributor

As some universities and colleges around the country struggle with drops in Federal Work-Study funds of over 30 percent, the University’s federal work-study funding increased for the 2010-11 school year, according to Director of College Aid Alicia Reyes.

The number of students eligible for work-study at the University has not changed significantly, Reyes said, and the University has experienced “nothing like what other schools experienced,” in part because of the relatively little federal work-study funding the University received last year.

The Department of Education received $200 million in stimulus funds for the Federal Work Study Program for 2009, which led to slight increases in work-study funding for some colleges nationwide. But the non-renewable Recovery Act funds were unavailable this year, and many schools dropped back to pre -stimulus levels, worrying some students

who rely on work-study funding at those schools.

New York University received 36 percent less federal funding for work-study this year compared to last year, according to the Washington Square News, NYU’s s t u d e n t n e w s p a p e r. G e o r g e Washington University’s (GW) GW Hatchet reported a drop in federal work-study funding of 34 percent.

The Hatchet reported that one GW sophomore, Matt Freeman, couldn’t find a work-study job after losing the one he had last year. “This year, I applied to seven different work-study jobs but I was unable to get any offers back,” Freeman said.

Nationwide, the cuts in workstudy translate to a loss of over 162,000 work-study jobs—and that number may go as high as 768,000 jobs, according to an article in the U.S. News and World Report.

But Reyes said the University of Chicago actually received slightly higher federal work-study funding this year. While the precise fig-

Will Burns (A.B. ’95, A.M. ’98), state representative for the 26th Ward, will run in the open primary for Fourth Ward Alderman on November 2 rather than put his name forward for an appointment.

Current Fourth Ward Alderman and candidate for President of the Cook County Board Toni Preckwinkle had announced in April that she recommended Burns to Mayor Richard M. Daley as a replacement.

However, Burns asked her not to recommend him after he learned from constituents that they often view appointments as an unfair advantage that give politicians planning to run in the next election a leg up.

“I don’t want anyone in the ward to feel they didn’t have a say in my selection for City Council,” Burns told the Hyde Park Herald in the Wednesday article “Burns unappointed.” Said Burns: “The ward has a number of constituents who believe in fair play. Appointments are viewed as unfair, and I agree with them.”

Preckwinkle declined to com-

ment to the Herald on whom she would recommend as “caretaker,” telling them she would consider it after the November 2 election.

In addition to Burns, George Rumsey, president of the Hyde Park-Kenwood Community Conference, Norman Bolden, owner of the banquet facility Room 43, and financial consultant Brian Scott are also running for Fourth Ward Alderman.

Will Burns will run in the Nov. 2 open primary for Fourth Ward Alderman rather than seek appointment.

CHRIS SALATA/MAROON

2

CHICAGO MAROON | NEWS | October 26, 2010

The humanities were on full display this weekend, as the Humanities Division presented 30 lectures on literature, religion, philosophy, history, art, and more.

The MAROON has a round-up of some of the day's best offerings.

Professor of Radiology Michael Vannier speaks about the radiological evidence he obtained for the Meresamun project using CT scanners. Vannier spoke Sunday as part of the Chicago Humanities Festival's Hyde Park day.

MATT BOGEN/MAROON

Bodies cross borders

Cloning Jewish life in images of war '20s Baghdad

Cohen cracks code of jokes

Sri Lankans find solace in lit

By Jingwen Hu News Contributor

By Anamaria Hernandez News Contributor

By Ivy Perez MAROON Staff

By Linda Qui MAROON Staff

By Anna Jones News Contributor

The directors of the U of C Human Rights Program (HRP) discussed the evolution of human rights and its relationship with illegal immigration.

Susan Gzesh, one of HRP’s directors, touched on the theme of the Humanities Day festival, “The Body.”

She gave the example of how when a human body crosses a state border, it changes from being a citizen with rights to an alien devoid of rights.

“The body, by crossing the border, may become vulnerable by being a non-citizen, but it should not lose its human rights,” Gzesh said.

Gzesh said that even though there are many legal protections for illegal immigrants in the United States, they lack economic, social, and cultural rights. But treating the problem will mean going to the source, Gzesh said, because “migration doesn’t begin at our borders.”

She used an analogy of a village situated downstream of a river. One day, the people in the village see an abandoned baby in the river. They rescue the baby. The next day, they see two babies in the river and rescue both. The third day, they see more babies in the river, and finally someone suggests that they should go upstream to find out where the babies are coming from.

The problem hit home when an

The uncanny similarities between the hooded man in the Abu Ghraib prison, Christ, and iPod dance ads influenced the public’s perception of the war on terror, English and Art History professor W.J.T. Mitchell said at a lecture.

Th e u n c a n n y , a c c o r d i n g t o Mitchell, involves a threshold where there is a state of ambivalence and uncertainty. The fi gure of the double, including the clone, both literally and metaphorically, figures the uncanny, he said.

While the war on terror may no longer make the top story in newspapers, Mitchell said, it is still prevalent in people’s minds because of its uncanny nature.

The image of the uncanny was exemplified in the infamous picture of the hooded man in the Abu Ghraib prison, “the ghostly figure that is going to haunt the war on terror,” Mitchell said.

“This is supposed to be the picture of the terrorist captured and brought to justice. Instead it turns it into a kind of composite Christ welcoming, Christ mocked image.”

Besides the uncanny similarity to Jesus, when the Abu Ghraib image was reproduced in the mass media, which had also been broadcasting the iPod dance ads, people noticed

HUMAN RIGHTS continued on page 4

UNCANNY continued on page 4

With a vision of 1920s and ’30s Baghdad as bustling with culturally productive and engaged Jews, Professor Orit Bashkin argued against the commonly-held belief that Iraqi Jews were always a segregated and oppressed minority.

Her talk, “The Jew in Babylon,” traced the rich history of the people, alluding to a golden era in which there was peaceful coexistence between Arab Iraqis and the substantial Jewish population in Baghdad.

Although the 1941 farhud, a violent pogrom directed against Baghdad Jews, is often seen as the beginning to the end of Jewish life in Baghdad, Bashkin contended that it was a time of strong ties between Arab and Jewish communities of the city.

Throughout the ’20s and ’30s, there were about 120,000 Jews living in Iraq, most of them centered in Baghdad and other urban areas.

Je w i s h c o m m u n i t i e s , B a s h k i n argued, were an integral part of Iraqi society, citing examples of Jewish intellectuals and artists in the city, such as Iraq’s first Minister of Finance, Sassoon Eskell, and the musician Salim Pasha.

But tensions escalated in Iraq when people conflated Jews and Zionists, who argued for a Jewish repatriation of Israel, Bashkin said.

At the same time, German propaganda began to invade Iraq, with Mein Kampf appearing in Iraqi newspapers.

Even so, Bashkin said that only some Iraqi nationalists wanted an alliance with Germany, and that they were not necessarily motivated by anti-Semitism. The thinking was: “The enemy of my enemy... is my friend,” she said. In conflict with England and France, Iraq befriended Germany.

After the collapse of the Iraqi government during the June 1941 coup d’etat, riots broke out in Baghdad while the city was in a state of instability. Riots and violence engulfed the city, much of it directed at Jews.

What do you get when you cross Humanities Day and an academic humorist? One Wilde time.

Philosophy professor Ted Cohen lectured on metaphors and joke— “Instruments of Freedom”—and explained the mechanisms behind his favorite punch lines.

Jokes and metaphors “require and resolve from the breaking of rules,” Cohen said. When these rules are broken, a sense of freedom is gained.

He praised Oscar Wilde, one of humanities’ most notable wits, as someone who could break these rules with ease.

“When a group of English gentry were asked to find a subject to discuss, one said, ‘Queen Victoria!’ Oscar Wilde immediately responded, ‘Queen Victoria is not a subject!’

“If you gave me a stack of paper, a week, and some water and food, I might have been able to think of that,” Cohen said.

A joke is much more than entertainment, Cohen said. It’s a unique form of human expression.

“Your joke-telling is a hope. You take a chance when you make a joke or metaphor,” Cohen said. “When your joke or metaphor does work with me, then we share humanity, then we share the world.”

Cohen recited passages from Shakespeare and the Hebrew “Song of Songs,” which uses a garden as a metaphor for romance. “Some have insisted that these lines are not about young sex.

Fat chance,” he said.

Cohen also distinguished between a story, a joke, and wit. He spoke of the role of the “staircase wit,” who comes up with a good comeback after the moment has passed.

Cohen stated that few things could offend him. Rather, he enjoys specificity in ridicule. He also said that he firmly believes in the power of laughter. “There is great virtue in shared laughter,” he said.

First-year Eliza Clark accompanied her father to the lecture for Parents’ Weekend. “I loved the jokes. They were hilarious. He was engaging. It was a discussion more than a lecture, and that’s the type of learning I like.”

Professor Sascha Ebeling spoke on the necessity of wartime literature, both as an emotional outlet for victims and as a tool for understanding for the world at large.

His presentation, “War, Trauma, and Humanism in Literature from Sri Lanka”, was devoted to the largely ignored Sri Lankan civil war that went on for nearly three decades.

The country’s two major ethnic groups, the Sinhalese and the Tamils, were locked in a bloody conflict from 1983 until May 2009, when the government declared the war was over.

Sri Lanka is now trying to recover from a near genocide that left thousands dead and a generation of Sri Lankans who have never known life without war, Ebeling said.

To define a particular war, Ebeling argued, we must look to the stories of people who have lived and witnessed the consequences. Stories of traumatic experiences are the most honest representation of war, more illuminating than studying photographs or statistics, he said.

He cited three kinds of literature that tackle the Sri Lankan civil war.

The first is the witness testimonial, which shares a personal experience so that it becomes part of a shared memory.

The second is what Ebeling called a “cosmopolitan humanistic approach,” which considers the Sri Lankan civil war in the context of wars throughout history.

The final category he described was stories of exile. He discussed the 2001 novel Gorilla by Shobasakthi, a Tamil writer and former child soldier who sought asylum in France. Gorilla expresses the crisis of identity faced by many Tamil exiles, whose population is now estimated at almost 1 million.

Ebeling ended the lecture by stressing the necessity of literature as a foundation for democracy itself, as the only consistent means to “keep the dialogue about values alive.”

He noted literature’s ability to close gaps in cultural understanding. “We must learn each other’s languages and read each other’s books,” Ebeling said.

Susan Gzesh and Michael Geyer discuss the evolution of human rights during Humanities Day. JINGWEN HU/MAROON

BASHKIN continued on page 4

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CHICAGO MAROON | NEWS | October 26, 2010

Margaret Mitchell, dean of Div School, honors Browning at memorial BROWNING continued from front page the service.

“Don was not perfect, but very little was lost in his life,” said Kristine A. Culp (Ph.D.’89), dean of the Disciples Divinity House and associate professor of theology.

The service consisted of a welcome and closing from Margaret M. Mitchell, dean and professor of New Testament and early Christian literature, as well as tributes from Culp and Schweiker. Ethics professor Jean Bethke Elshtain and Elizabeth Marquardt

Lecture & Reception: Sweet Home Chicago DATES

Chocolate and Confectionery

Oct. 29

Production and Technology in the Windy City

TIMES 4:00 - 5:30 pm LOCATION Crerar Library Zar Room

Beth Kimmerle, curator of the “Sweet Home Chicago” exhibition and author of Candy: The Sweet History and Chocolate: The Sweet History, will speak about chocolate and confectionery production and technology in Chicago. This event is free and will be followed by a reception. RSVP: 773-702-7569

lib.uchicago.edu/e/crerar/

(M.Div. ‘99), vice president for family studies at the Institute for American Values, also spoke.

All five spoke of Browning’s genuine personality and his utter lack of self-pity in his final weeks.

Instead, he seemed to be filled with generativity, Schweiker said, a concern for the future, and a desire to help guide younger generations.

Elshtain said it would take ten people to fill the gap that he left.

CORRECTIONS The October 22 News article “U of C Posts $500 Million Gain In FY 2010” incorrectly described the increase in the University's endowment in the last fiscal year. The endowment grew about 9 percent during fiscal year 2010.

The October 22 News article “Lawful Israel Unfairly Criticized, Israeli Politician Says” incorrectly attributed a quote spoken by Arthur Lenk to a doctoral student in the audience.

The October 22 News article “Wandering Talk On Pakistani Floods Riles Audience” incorrectly named the event's sponsors. The talk was sponsored by the Center for International Studies, the South Asia Language and Area Center, the Committee on Southern Asian Studies, and the Pakistan Club at the Booth School, in cooperation with the American Institute of Pakistan Studies. Though UChicago for Pakistan presented information on flood relief efforts, the organization did not sponsor the event.

The MAROON is committed to correcting mistakes for the record. If you suspect the MAROON has made an error, please alert the newspaper by e-mailing Editor@ChicagoMaroon.com.

M

Got a tip? Let us know.

E-mail us at News@ChicagoMaroon.com.

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CHICAGO MAROON | NEWS | October 26, 2010

All of humanity affected by breaches of human rights, Geyer argues HUMAN RIGHTS continued from page 2 audience member told her story to the hushed crowd.

The woman said she has been stuck in the U.S. for 16 years because she immigrated illegally as a child. She has a Ph.D. in economics but she cannot work here. She can return to her home country, but she cannot bring her child with her.

At the lecture, she wanted to know how she can exercise her “right to live.”

HRP’s other director, Michael Geyer, posed the problem of justifying human rights as being

Arabs hid Jews during fahrud

particular to humans, and why. “Even if we agree that human rights exist as rights for every human, what difference does it make?” Geyer said.

Noting the many international groups and conventions intended to promote and protect human rights, he reasoned that human rights are particular to humans because humans can feel pain and recognize it in others, have the capacity to do good and evil, and are accountable for their actions.

Furthermore, crimes against humanity are considered crimes against all mankind because

“Everybody, directly or indirectly, is affected by the breach,” Geyer said.

“I feel both enlightened and overwhelmed,” said Sharon Eiseman (M.A. ’64), a lawyer who in her spare time advocates for women’s rights. She said the lecture broadened her view on how to frame questions of inequality.

Another attendee, Noel Hertz, said the lecture was a step toward addressing these issues.

“Getting the question formulated is the most important part of addressing the question,” he said.

Prof says uncanniness of Abu Ghraib image changed America's narrative of the Iraq war UNCANNY continued from page 2 that the characters in the ads also looked similar to the figure.

The uncanniness of the two figures took away the last excuse for the invasion of Iraq, according to Mitchell. “The weapons of mass destruction were the first alibi.

Connections of al-Qaeda were the second.

The only thing left was that we were liberating,” Mitchell said.

That image of torture meant America

could no longer claim innocence, he said.

Mitchell compared the images of a Google search for “terrorists” with an image of the Stormtroopers from Star Wars: Revenge of the Clones. In both cases, the warriors are faceless and anonymous, both marching off to battle.

Mitchell explained, “This is the new image of the army or the crowd, in which you don’t get your individuality back when you leave the crowd,” he said.

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The lecture was based on his upcoming publication, Cloning Terror: The War of Images, 9/11 to Present, which will be released by the University of Chicago Press in November 2011.

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BASHKIN continued from page 2 Bashkin pointed out that much of this violence, however, was due to social conditions in the city, and that the city’s many homeless urban poor were responsible for much of the looting.

Some Arab communities, families, and individuals protected Jews or hid them in their homes, Bashkin said. In many cases, Arabs intervened with the rioters on behalf of the Jews; while poor Jewish communities were the most affected, those communities with both Jewish and Arab families suffered much less damage.

“The image of defenseless Jews is inaccurate,” Bashkin said, “But mostly, it was friendship, people remembering neighborly relationships.”

Bashkin ended her lecture by showing a series of YouTube videos of Jewish Iraqi musicians that had comments by current Iraqis, whom she identified as mostly Arab. Most of them expressed nostalgia for the time when Jews were an important presence in Iraq.

Work-study funding increases $100,000, to almost $2.9 million WORK STUDY continued from front page ures were unavailable, Reyes estimated an increase of around $100,000 from over $2.7 million for the 2009-2010 academic year to almost $2.9 million this year.

Each September, the University submits an application to the Department of Education for the Federal Work-Study Program, along with a report of how workstudy funds were used in the previous year, Reyes said. The requests are evaluated, and tentative decisions are received in the spring for work-study funding. The final award decision arrives in late March or early April, Reyes said.

The reason for the University’s relative stability in work-study funding is two-fold, according to Reyes. The University didn’t get much stimulus funding last year, and the total work-study allotment overall was relatively small compared to other schools.

Some schools turn down money, Reyes said, which schools can apply for as supplemental funding. The University received some of that funding for this year, she said, “so we made up in a sense what we lost [this year] through the stimulus.”

The total work-study funds are distributed by the University to undergraduate and graduate students. The Office of College Aid names about one thousand undergraduate students eligible for work-study, a number that takes into account the number of students who will not make full use of their work-study eligibility. “We know there are certain students that will choose not to work. Some students will choose jobs that are not work-study eligible, and others won’t work the entire year,” Reyes said.

Work-study jobs are critical for students, according to Jake Stillwell, communications director at the United States Student Association, a group that lobbies for students on local and national issues.

“The unemployment rate for young people is already well above the national average, and when you look at it for students of color, it’s even worse; without the work-study jobs there, the chances of getting a part-time job are really small,” he said. “When you just take what you can get, you don’t get to take time off or change your hours for exams, or classes, or anything like that. It’s a bad situation in general, you get more flexibility from a work-study job where they understand you’re a student.”

5

CHICAGO MAROON | VIEWPOINTS | October 15, 2010

VIEWPOINTS

EDITORIAL & OP-ED OCTOBER 26, 2010

EDITORIAL

CHICAGO MAROON

The student newspaper of the University of Chicago since 1892

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Prepping for the A-Level The University should facilitate student understanding of library resources.

The University requires almost every first-year to pass the swim test or, if that doesn’t pan out, to take a swim class, presumably so they won’t sink the next time they find themselves hanging out in open water. Of course, drowning doesn’t seem a terrible threat in these climes, where bodies of water are mostly either freezing cold or frozen solid, but if you want a fair idea of what drowning feels like, just try to make sense of the Library’s collections, its website, or any of the numerous databases it subscribes to, without first having some training or orientation.

While rudimentary knowledge of the doggy paddle is a non-negotiable requirement for a Bachelor’s degree at the University, you can make it through O-Week, and in many cases your entire college career, without the first clue of how our libraries work, what they include, or where to find in them the materials you need. Surely no

one would argue the Australian crawl is anything less than an indispensable component of the comprehensive liberal education, but still, doesn’t the short shrift given the Library seem a little bit incongruous?

In fact, permitting students to go without at least a basic understanding of what the Library offers makes less sense now than ever before. As the body of knowledge stored in electronic databases grows, so do the benefits student researchers stand to reap if they can sift through the Library’s numerous online resources. Unfortunately, a lifetime of Googling won’t make you a savvy searcher on complicated databases like ProQuest and Web of Science, and when you don’t know how to work the Library’s increasingly high-tech resources, they can be more a hindrance than a help.

Familiarity with the old-school physical collections is worthwhile, too. There

STATE AND MADISON

OP-ED

Insulting our intelligence Negative campaign ads are more annoying than informative

By Jake Grubman MAROON Staff Woman who looks like Sigourney Weaver’s less attractive sister: “I don’t think he has a clue about unemployment.” Man who looks like your best friend’s dad: “How can you vote against tax cuts for middle-class families?” The woman again: “His whole political career is probably a lie.”

This could literally be any campaign commercial for any politician anywhere. The candidate has taken to the streets (the working man that he is) to find out what actual voters think about his opponent. And then, because this is Illinois and because this is an Alexi Giannoulias commercial against Mark Kirk, another woman comes on at the end with the killer line and surely the decisive idea that will swing every last undecided voter: “I would not trust him with my left shoe.”

Someone actually said this. Fine. I would probably trust Mark Kirk with both of my shoes, if for some reason I needed him to watch them for a few minutes. But worse than the fact that a fellow Illinoisan chose those words to assess Kirk is the fact that Giannoulias’s campaign decided to air them. And people, apparently, just keep on listening.

CAMPAIGN continued on page 6

are troves of raw data and primary sources to help you finish assignments, or blockbuster DVDs and bestselling novels to help you put off assignments, whichever is more your style. But even if you realize those things are somewhere within the Library’s collection, it’s not always obvious where to find them, and it’s easy to give up before you do.

There’s no reason for students to be floundering through the Library’s offerings, or avoiding them altogether. A few keystrokes in the O-Book could change Library orientation from “optional” to “required.” If the Library doesn’t have the staff to accommodate a mandatory program, or if the University is hesitant to impose an across-the-board requirement, then more professors ought to take advantage of the Library’s in-class information sessions. Librarians can prepare training programs tailored to a specific course’s research needs, and even if some students have heard a

similar presentation before, it won’t hurt to have a refresher. If nothing else, the professors will enjoy a bit more breadth and creativity in their students’ source work when reading final papers.

The libraries on this campus aren’t just big buildings; they’re also big investments and big resources, and they should be treated accordingly.

The University should no more assume students will intuitively know how to use the libraries than it assumes they know how to read Marx, or write deltaepsilon proofs, or swim two laps in the pool. The University and its faculty take those things seriously, and they ensure that each student grasps them in full.

The very same should be true of library research.

The M AROON Editorial Board consists of the Editor-in-Chief, Viewpoints Editors, and an Editorial Board member.

Researching opportunities Research assistantships can clarify post-graduation plans

By Cynthia Liu Viewpoints Contributor It’s the time of the year that fourthyears dread: application season.

Whether you are applying to graduate school or planning on taking a gap year, it’s time to put away your summer and think about the future.

It’s too late for many of us now.

Well, at least regarding this application cycle. You still have time to apply (get those recommendation requests out fast!), but unless you’re waiting for Fall 2012, your accomplishments thus far are locked down.

There is no time to start a charity, become president of a service organization, or join a lab and have your last-ditch efforts save you from your wasted undergraduate years.

But for all the rest of you who aren’t applying yet—there’s hope: Research.

Now, research is normally only associated with science, but it’s also important in economics, the social sciences, and even the humanities.

If you have ever had an inkling that graduate school might be your future, or considered your future at all, now is the time to get your feet wet.

One of the most compelling reasons to do research is to find out what drives you. After all, you shouldn’t start assembling letters of recommendation and writing personal statements if you don’t truly know what you want to do. Research provides you with an opportunity to figure out whether or not grad school is actually right for you. Biology might seem exciting on paper, but daily Westerns and minipreps might not be your bag.

You might love sociology, but not sifting through statistics. Or maybe your passions soar above all tedious

tasks of everyday graduate work.

In 2007, The Chronicle of Higher Education reported that only 57 percent of doctoral students end up with their degrees within ten years. And even if the programs are shorter, students in the sciences should consider that mathematics and the physical science graduate programs have the highest drop-out rates among academic fields. Although there will always be extenuating circumstances, I’m sure that much of the other 43 percent could have benefited from early experience. Getting a research position in your field will give you a taste of academia and also surround you with grad students, post-docs, and professors whose experiences will augment your knowledge.

Even if you already have plans for post-graduation, research experience will help you figure out the details. I knew that I wanted to be a chemist, but classes did little to help me decide on the field. Organic? Physical?

Spending time in a lab helped me decide on a specific program. Not only that, but talking to my principal investigators has helped me compile a list of graduate schools based on more than a copy of U.S. News & World Report.

Once you discover your passion, research will then help you to learn more about it. That seems really obvious, but it isn’t when you’ve been learning from textbooks for most of your student life. Your parents aren’t paying $50,000 just for classes, but to provide you with an academic community that supports exploration and learning outside of the classroom.

Organic chemistry class might teach you that alkyl lithiums are reactive, but a small explosion really teaches you that alkyl lithiums are reactive.

And it’s only by talking to people in the field that you can learn more about it. Current professors and students can tell you about the field now, while many classes focus on old news.

The last thing is that research experience sets you apart. Every graduate application that I’ve come across has a section solely dedicated to your research experience. And if your experience amounts to poking at fruit flies for a total of three days for some required lab, you won’t be at the head of the constantly expanding pack of prospective students.

A fantastic recommendation letter written by your research supervisor will ameliorate (but not rescue) suboptimal grades or middling GRE scores. Basically, research experience and the connections you make during it are extremely important.

Besides résumé padding, research helps you actually accomplish something. Whether that something is an honors BA or a publication, your heart will beam as your nerd flag flutters proudly in the wind. Sure, nobody else might care, but if the work you do helps you in figuring out your future path, you will.

So talk to professors who have taught classes you’ve loved. Comb through FROGS and search through abstracts and papers. Talk to advisors and classmates. Correspond with professors by e-mail and phone, even those who aren’t in Chicago. And maybe, at this time in 2011, 2012, or 2013, when you are applying for grad school, you’ll be full of excitement instead of dread.

Cynthia Liu is a fourth-year in the College majoring in Chemistry.

6

CHICAGO MAROON | VIEWPOINTS | October 26, 2010

Negative advertisements are poorly-made and boring

OP-ED

CAMPAIGN continued from page 5

By Adam Ahmad Viewpoints Contributor

It feels like every campaign season has especially bad negative advertising, but this one in particular is pushing my patience while leaving me completely disillusioned with both of Illinois’s senatorial candidates. It was in early October that Giannoulias and Kirk met with the Chicago Tribune’s editorial board to discuss taxes, war, and—you guessed it—campaign advertising. That was the low point in the campaign (and the high point of dirty advertising), with Giannoulias calling Kirk a liar and Kirk calling Giannoulias a “mob banker.” When the Tribune board asked the candidates if they would renounce negative advertising, the answer was predictable. Giannoulias said he would do it only if Kirk agreed to, and Kirk responded, “I think we’re going to have the full First Amendment in this race.” And the fighters retreated to their corners, preparing for another round of bad ads.

It feels like this will always be the case for every election everywhere. That’s an exaggeration, but not a big one. I’ve resigned myself to the fact that campaign commercials will always be predominantly negative because voters remember those best, and if enough people really cared about eliminating negative ads, they would just do it.

That’s how the game has to be played. The voters ultimately do get to say what works and what doesn’t and what goes and what doesn’t, because at the end of the day they’re the ones who have to be convinced. The unfortunate effect of negative ad wars is that politicians have zero room for specifics and instead just bludgeon voters to death with stupid advertisements. I’ve always heard clamoring over the mudslinging, but clamoring is all it’s ever going to be.

Has anyone else stopped listening to these ads completely? Is anyone else bored? Because as much as I love bad Photoshop jobs, gruff voices, distorted fonts and poor coloration, I just don’t care anymore, even when I do care about the campaign.

I can actually feel my brain turning off when those commercials turn on (which I guess means it’s good that the ads are only 30 seconds long, because I’m not great at being alive while my brain is nonfunctional). The ads are so bad, so poorly made, and so obnoxious that I actually feel better about the target of criticism than I did before.

The Supreme Court’s Citizens United v. F.E.C. decision handed down in January is having multiple effects on political campaigns, all of them bad.

The case essentially allows any person or corporation to contribute anonymously to groups that produce campaign advertisements. If you could do something—anything—anonymously, do you think that thing would be positive or negative?

Would you be extra-ethical under the protection of anonymity?

That it’s been hard to identify the Citizens United commercials in the Kirk-Giannoulias campaign is an indictment of the role this decision is playing in American politics. If this case were resulting in any positive ads, we would know it because the groups behind positive commercials always—always—make sure people know who’s behind them. Citizens United means more of the usual, just now there’s even more of the usual.

If the question is not whether or not they will continue to exist, it has to be: Who listens to these commercials? Who believes them? Every election season, I pray to the Board of Election Gods that voters will be able to find their way around the negative ads, because they’re so often wrong and they show such disregard for the truth. If these politicians are willing to say anything to get the job, I can’t help but feel suspicious of everything they say. These ads succeed only in creating that suspicion, while doing nothing to actually convince me that either candidate is good for the job.

After weeks and weeks of negative advertising, Kirk and Giannoulias have done little to prove themselves as viable candidates.

So while I’d be happy to entrust Kirk (or Giannoulias) with my left shoe, their ads don’t have me so sure I can trust them to be my senator.

Jake Grubman is a fourth-year in the College majoring in Law, Letters, and Society.

Go easy on Pakistan: In response to Zalmay Khalilzad One of the most pressing issues in the Middle East is the deteriorating relationship between the U.S. and Pakistan. President Obama is trying to maintain congenial relations with Islamabad because of its geostrategic importance in the fight in Afghanistan against al-Qaeda and the Taliban, which may dwell on the Pakistani border.

However, recent U.S. operations within Pakistan, such as increased drone attacks and the killing of two Pakistani soldiers by U.S. aerial strikes, have greatly soured this alliance. Similarly, the Pakistani government’s perennial support for extremists and reluctance to vanquish militants within its borders frustrate U.S. public and military officials.

If you browse through the October 19 issue of The New York Times, you will find the op-ed “Get Tough on Pakistan,” by former ambassador to Afghanistan, Iraq, and the UN during the George W. Bush administration, Mr. Zalmay Khalilzad, now counselor at the Center for Strategic and International Studies (CSIS). There is no doubt in my mind that Mr. Khalilzad is an intelligent man with years of government service. Nonetheless,

his article suggests that the Obama administration demand that Pakistan cut ties with extremists, on the penalty of U.S. military involvement in Pakistan without Pakistani approval. He goes on to say that Pakistan is more than capable of countering any potential repercussions that may arise because of unilateral U.S. action.

I think Mr. Khalilzad misunderstands two things.

One, Pakistan is not going to readily disentangle itself from the extremists. Why would it when the militants are willing to provide some strategic leverage to Pakistan in the fight for influence in Kashmir and Afghanistan? It is a relationship that has lasted the past twenty-five years and will not just end because of Western pressure. Mr. Khalilzad wants Pakistan to isolate the militants, which will result in tremendous consequences, as the extremists will increase attacks against the Pakistani state.

Essentially, he is insisting that U.S. forces go in, achieve its goal, and leave Pakistan to deal with the resulting conflagration. This scenario is not in Pakistan’s best interest, especially at this time, as it is trying to recover from the recent floods. A better strategy would be for the U.S. to use Pakistan’s special relationship with the Taliban to further push this militant reconciliation initiative, a project that

should have received more attention months ago.

Second, undermining Pakistan’s sovereignty is one of the worst things the U.S. can do for its perception in the country. Pakistanis don’t want their government to cede authority over to Westerners that don’t have the country’s best interest in mind.

This is the reason Pakistanis were displeased with former President Pervez Musharraf.

Pakistan may react by closing its supply line to Afghanistan. But its leaders could also respond to Khalilzad’s suggestions by not sharing intelligence on Afghanistan or forbidding the U.S. to perform any operations within its borders.

One must remain cognizant of the fact that the Pakistanis want the U.S. to treat them respectfully.

This is a key ingredient to any alliance. If we accept Mr. Khalilzad’s proposals, Pakistan will indisputably react negatively and the consequences for the U.S. will be substantial, a prospect Mr. Khalilzad plays down. In my view, the U.S. can no longer pursue its national security interests with complete disregard for the concerns of our allies or the public they govern. This all seems dangerously obvious to me.

Adam Ahmad is a graduate student pursuing an M.A. in International Relations.

Jean Mitchell Watson Lecture 2010 Department of Ecology and Evolution

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Dr. Green is the Director of the National Human Genome Research Institute (NHGRI)— the largest organization in the world dedicated to genomic research. For over 20 years, he has been extensively involved in efforts to map, sequence, and understand the human genome. Join us to hear Dr. Green’s insights into the current state of genomics research and the future of genomic medicine.

Reception: Immediately following the lecture in the BSLC lobby.

Persons with a disability needing assistance, please call 773-702-1988 in advance.

VOICES

ARTS & ENTERTAINMENT OCTOBER 26, 2010

THEATER

BOOKS

refutes U of C's reputation Aukin directs Old Masters Grad by penning dating guide Alum returns to city to direct Steppenwolf's latest

By Hallie Grumer Voices Casanova Among the many traits UChicago students are known for, dating prowess is certainly not one of them. So, it may be surprising that University of Chicago grad Vijay Chokal contributed to Ofer Batt’s new dating guide, How to Succeed with Women Without Being Weird. The book encompasses many aspects of dating, from how to understand what women want to where to meet them, and all the way to how to seduce them.

The Maroon sat down with both Chokal and Batt to discuss wooing the ladies.

CHICAGO MAROON: How and why did the two of you first enter the field of dating advice?

Ofer Batt: [Vijay] and I met while we were students at UCLA business school. I noticed that many of my classmates, who were good-looking and professionally successful, had a lot of difficulty when it came to meeting women and dating. They were afraid to approach women or didn’t know what to say or do on a date. We took a couple of these guys out with us and started giving them dating advice. Their subsequent success made me realize that I could really have an impact as a dating coach. That was two years ago.

I decided to dedicate my career to helping men to improve their success with women. I think that my work as a dating coach is as important as my work as a physician. More than anything, I am proud of the positive impact I have had on my date-coaching clients.

Director Daniel Aukin and Steppenwolf Director of Artistic Development Polly Carl observe a rehearsal of The Old Masters.

COURTESY OF STEPPENWOLF THEATRE

By Ben Sigrist Voices, With More Feeling!

If you think the U of C’s theater program is overshadowed by our counterparts at DePaul and Northwestern, then there’s someone you should know. Daniel Aukin graduated from the University of Chicago in 1993 with a degree in Religion and the Humanities. He then went on to cofound a theater company in Austin, Texas and later became the artistic director of the esteemed Soho Rep in New York City. Embarking on his own path as an independent director since 2006, Aukin has returned to Chicago to direct The Old Masters, written by Sam Marks, as part of Steppenwolf Theatre’s New Look series.

With his feet propped up on a plastic fold-out table and his script binder positioned on an adjacent music stand, Aukin appears both relaxed and intent as he watches his actors rehearse a scene from The Old Masters, even as the regularly passing El trains rattle the rehearsal space.

Occasionally he quickly calls out a direction—“stay looking at her” or “try this while sitting down”—or stops the

scene entirely to hustle over to the actors and whisper instructions or suggestions to them. Adam Ganderson, the show’s stage manager, leaned over to me during the rehearsal I attended to explain that Aukin deliberately keeps

THE OLD MASTERS Steppenwolf Theatre Through November 14

his voice down so that his directions will only be audible to the actors in question.

Speaking from his own experience workshopping new plays, Aukin explained, “It’s very useful, if you’re giving Actor A a direction privately, for Actor B not to know and to experience it with no anticipation of what happens. And whatever that provokes is going to be different than if they knew what was coming.”

Aukin’s efficient directions and confident persona in rehearsal testify to years of experience, but he can also remember a time when he wasn’t so seasoned.

“I’m really pleased that I didn’t

study theater,” said Aukin, recalling his undergraduate years. “I’m really pleased that I got to do theater. For me, doing it has always been the greatest education.”

In 1990, during his first year at the U of C, he directed The Zoo Story by Edward Albee. “I didn’t really have any idea what the hell I was doing,” he recalled. “But that hasn’t changed that much.”

Nevertheless, he was grateful for such an opportunity, which he thinks would have been “virtually impossible” for a freshman in a large theater department to have.

In his fourth year, Aukin teamed up with classmates Steve Moore and Michael Martin to write and produce a play titled Love and Happiness. “In my mind we came down as an actor/ director/writer combo,” said Moore, who co-wrote the play. Aukin worked on the script with Moore during the writing phrase and directed Martin in the production.

Inspired by the avant-garde plays of Richard Foreman, Love and Happiness features a character named X who stays at a hotel filled with bizarre ten-

AUKIN continued on page 9

CM: When did you “join forces,” so to speak? And what is it like to co-author a book?

Vijay Chokal: I think that Ofer and I are the classic case of “synergy.” I’m extremely outgoing and have absolutely no fear of rejection.

Ofer is a natural leader, has strong “frame control” and never lets anyone get the better of him in an argument. Individually, both of us are great with women, but together we were unstoppable. That is why we started a company together.

OB: [Vijay] is right. Our personal strengths complement each other.

[Vijay] concentrates on helping men to overcome and approach anxiety and meet women. I concentrate on teaching them to take leadership on dates and behave in a way that is attractive to women. Both skills are critical to dating success.

VC: Ofer was the primary author of the book, but I wrote several chapters, including the “Approaching Women” chapter and the “Phone Strategy” chapter. I also edited and re-wrote large portions of the book based on my own experiences. In the final two edits, we went line by line through the entire book together to ensure that everything we

wrote was clear and addressed all of the important issues men needed to know in order to improve their skills with women.

CM: How did you come up with the name Hollywood Wingmen, the name of your dating coaching company?

O B : The Holly wood part came because we were living in Holly wood while we attended UCLA business school. Also, we took many of our initial date coaching clients out in Hollywood.

Hollywood is a fun town.

The Wingmen portion came from our teaching methods. After experimenting with different teaching methods, we found that the best way to help a guy to improve his

HOW TO SUCCEED WITH WOMEN WITHOUT BEING WEIRD Released August 23

skills with women was to take him out to a nightclub, shopping center, or busy area and instruct him how to approach women. This way you could give him real-time feedback, ensure that he was following through on the advice you gave him and actually talking to girls.

Before college, I was an instructor in the Israeli air force. In the air force, a “wingman” accompanies a lead pilot on a mission to ensure that the mission objectives are fulfilled. As dating coaches, we were real-life “wingmen.” I guess it’s a little cheesy to say, but by taking our clients out in Hollywood, we became “Hollywood Wingmen.”

CM: What sparked the name for the book?

OB: Many dating coaches for men (aka “pickup artists”) are performance artists such as magicians or comedians. They teach men to use cheesy pickup lines, do magic tricks or dress eccentrically to meet and date women. Just read The Game, by Neil Strauss.

I realized that most men are not performance artists and feel uncomfortable using these cheesy techniques. I tried to write a guide to dating for men that avoided this kind of behavior. After reading it, one of the clients told me, “This is the first time I have read a book that teaches how to succeed with women without being weird.” I decided to use this as the title for the book because I think it conveys the essence of what we tried to achieve.

CM: How did you decide to structure the book?

OB: Based on our experience as dating coaches, we structured the book in such a way to tell men how to improve their skills with women in the most logical way. The first part of the book (“How to Attract

DATING continued on page 8

8

CHICAGO MAROON | VOICES | October 26, 2010

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Foodents: No hurry for curry from Chicago Curry House “Baseball is 90 percent mental, and the other half is physical.” – Yogi Berra, 1957 Going out to eat is a very particular experience, and it is one that requires a number of elements to make it enjoyable, many of which have nothing to do with food. The lighting, the atmosphere, the service, the location, the conversations you have, and the things you remember: These things matter.

As with comparable experiences in life, dining out is often the most rewarding when it hits you with something unexpected, serving both the food itself and a new idea of what it even means to serve food. For us college students eager to understand the grand mysteries of the world, the latter is even more important. A night out on the town is not merely that. It is an unusual respite, a chance for us to free our minds from the disconcerting rhythms of organized life, to once again climb back on top of Time and declare ourselves its dubious master.

So, pause with us a moment. Pause with us and remember the greats. The Thai restaurant nestled snugly between the daycare and dance studio of a Young Women’s Christian Association. The ever-elusive Taco Truck that one can only find when one is not looking for it. Eastern European bars with clientele drawn exclusively from the

same construction company. Legendary abalone shacks run by proprietors with dark, criminal pasts. Amish caravans that hold parking-lot pig roasts the third Sunday of every month. Diners in old train cars. Drive-ins the size of cubicles.

Eat-in sausage factories.

Our trip to the Chicago Curry House ultimately did not make this list of greats. It is a very good Indian and Nepalese restaurant, but it is entirely, shamelessly preoccupied with serving you food and only food. New experiences have no place here. The food is quasi-memorable, but the experience is not. And the food is memorable only if one sits down on the old thinking stool and has a good ol’ think about the Nepalese goat stew one ate last night. It’s not unlikely that one will reach a positive verdict, but it’s going to take a disappointingly long time.

It’s time to level with you, dear reader. We don’t particularly want to be writing this column.

I mean, it’s not like the Curry House was terrible or anything. It was good. But, goddammit, this column is coming out about as easily as a Calvinist in 16th-century Geneva. So, not very easily.

Nothing changed when we went to the Curry House. Our rhythm continued uninterrupted and our weekend stayed uninspired. Devoting this much space, positive or negative, to the

Curry House just seems wrong, like zooming in too closely to some corner of a painting or just listening to a solitary note in a song. The Curry House as an isolated island of experience wasn’t just disappointing; it was downright nonexistent, falling comfortably into the category of “Things We Did on Saturday” rather than standing on its own.

CHICAGO CURRY HOUSE 899 South Plymouth Court (312) 362-9999

In the Curry House, the conversation actually transitioned from pre-feudal agrarian systems to politics. For your Foodents, this was rather unsettling (the preferred topic of conversation being things that could be or have been utterly shattered.) We left with about eight different dishes, all packed carefully into the sort of container usually reserved for pico de gallo.

The Curry House feeds, but it cannot satiate. It intrigues, but it cannot inspire. Someday, maybe, we will return to the Curry House. Perhaps, after a couple of years, the non-memory of the Curry House will have mostly left our minds, leaving

Ofer and Chokal explain how their backgrounds influenced How to Succeed DATING continued from page 7 Women”) will teach men the core principles they need to know to attract women and to dispel any misconceptions they may have.

The second part of the book (“How to Succeed with Women”) will teach men, in chronological order, the absolute essentials needed to succeed with women: What to wear, where to go to meet girls, what to do on a date, and so on. The third part of the book (“Advanced Topics”) addresses more advanced subjects such as sex, criteria for selecting women, and Internet dating.

CM: Now, Vijay, you are a UChicago alum.

How did that influence the advice that you gave in the book (knowing the reputation that our school has)?

VC: First of all, my experience at UChicago probably was not typical. I was the social chair of Psi Upsilon fraternity, and I had a car, so I spent a lot of time clubbing downtown or hanging out with my fraternity brothers.

I also had a serious girlfriend for my last two years. I knew that UChicago was not a terribly social school, so I made a point to meet people outside of school and have a good time.

I was also a classmate of Tucker Max. I respect the guy, but I am not going to pretend that we were close friends. I’ll be the first to say the kid has game—but you don’t have to be quite so much of a (self-described) asshole or alcoholic in order to enjoy more success with women than you dreamed possible.

I think that my UChicago education actually helped me as a dating coach. At UChicago, I developed an analytical mind and the ability to teach what I learned (After all, UChicago is the “teacher of teachers.”).

The truth is that there are a lot of guys who are successful with women. These guys instinctually know how to act around women, but they couldn’t teach a frog to jump and they don’t understand what aspects of their behavior attract women (being self-confident, aggressive, taking

leadership, not fearing rejection, and not caring what other people think) and what aspects are just strange personality quirks (doing magic tricks, using cheesy pickup lines, dressing eccentrically, drinking too much, or generally acting like a dickhead). I understood the difference, which made me a better dating coach.

A dating coach has to be good with women but he also has to have an analytical mind and the ability to teach what he knows to other men. UChicago helped me with the last two parts.

CM: Dr. Ofer, how has your background as a physician aided you in writing this book?

OB: As a physician, I noticed that patients that are not from the medicine world have a hard time understanding medical terminology and sometimes couldn’t understand things that seemed very trivial to me. I implemented this lesson in the book: We avoided pickup community terminology such as kino (physical contact) or AFC (Average Frustrated Chump) and tried to explain as much as possible assuming the reader has no prior knowledge whatsoever.

VC: I guess it’s worth mentioning that I also went to medical school after I graduated UChicago, but ultimately dropped out.

CM: What is the best piece of advice you’ve ever received?

OB: The best piece of advice I ever got was something that [Vijay] told me. He said, “Logistics, it’s all about logistics.”

[Vijay] made me realize that dating is a game of logistics. You can be the most charming guy in the world but if the logistics are unfavorable, you will fail. For instance, a girl could be madly in love with you, but if you don’t have a private place where you can be together, chances are good that she is not going to be with you tonight. I still remember the time that [Vijay] followed a girl into a Brazilian favela [slum] because we didn’t realize until too late that the hotel in Rio

De Janiero we were staying in did not allow female guests. Bad logistics.

VC: You have to plan good logistics—you have to schedule a convenient time to meet a girl, plan interesting activities, make sure you have contraceptives on you at all times, and make sure that your date ends at a comfortable place where you can both be alone together.

Don’t underestimate the importance of good logistics in dating! And for your information, nothing bad happened in the favela.

CM: What is your number one tip for anyone going out into the world of dating?

OB: The best advice I give is to “take a chance” or as [Vijay] says, “Roll the dice.”

There are so many times that a single guy will see a beautiful woman and want to talk to her or be on a date with a woman and want to kiss her, but he’ll be afraid to make a move because he doesn’t want to get rejected. This is a huge mistake. If you just talked to that girl or tried to kiss her, you’d be amazed how often things go your way. It is so much worse to miss an opportunity with a girl than to step up to the plate and strike out. In fact, women will respect you more for being bold even if they do reject you. Remember that opportunity never knocks twice.

CM: What’s the worst date you’ve ever been on?

VC: The problem with online dating is that sometimes women don’t accurately portray themselves. They’ll post a picture that is 10 years old back when they were 30 pounds lighter and you don’t know until you meet them in person.

I met a girl online and agreed to see her at a local coffee shop. When I arrived, she was totally different than her profile photo. So I told her I didn’t appreciate the fact that she lied to me by sending old photos and left. She basically stalked me for a month afterward.

Now, if I meet a girl online, I always videochat with her before I agree to meet her in person.

only the vestigial concept of a Nepalese/Indian restaurant in the South Loop of Chicago.

But it must be said that the Curry House serves very good, and possibly interesting, food.

The Nepalese items on the menu are intensely flavored in ways that are unfamiliar to the average Western diner. Please take a look at this last sentence and reread the word “intense” a few times, because that’s how their dal Bhuteko Kauli tastes. Their mango lassis as well.

We would like to apologize for all of this negativity. But unless you acknowledge the clouds, how much can you truly know of the blueness of the sky?

Farewell, stay well, eat well. :( As a postscript, a note on what we ordered: The Non Veg Bhojan—a vast sampler of Nepalese food—consisted of khukurako Maasu (chicken with bone and Nepalese spices), Khasi Ko Maasu (goat with bone and Nepalese spices), Aloo (cubed shaped boiled potatoes), Tama Bodi (potatoes, bamboo shoots, and black-eyed peas), Nepali dal Bhuteko Kauli (Nepalese-style yellow lentils) with Bhat Roti and Kheer (meat with bone). This was twenty dollars, a good deal. This was markedly better than a Tandoori platter that we also ordered.

Review: Succeed with Women relies on clichés Sections in How to Succeed with Women Without Being Weird verge on the comically absurd, possibly as the result of it being written by two men. The views expressed about women often seem to reveal more about the psychology of the authors than about actual dating. Some of their suggestions may appear degrading or inappropriate, particularly given their often overly simplistic discussion of feminine mentality. Although generalizations are necessary for a dating guide with such a wide scope, these broad overviews diminish the usefulness of otherwise helpful comments and can make them appear insensitive.

The advice offered in each section is written in a simplistic way and provides practical solutions to problems or fears of the dating world. While the counsel given in the sections is constructive for the most part, many are uninspired, commonplace suggestions such as “be confident” or “dress well.” However, encouraging advice like this is also mixed with misleading suggestions like “be a player” or “make subtle insults.” This makes it hard to utilize the positive instructions without including negative ones as well.

While many of the tips given seem intuitive or obvious, it is helpful to remember that the book is intended for a specific audience with very little experience in the dating world. For those men who are more confident or capable in their romantic interactions, this book is probably unhelpful in that it will not offer any new perspectives or specific details. If, however, you are someone who finds talking to women prohibitively uncomfortable, this book may serve as a useful starting point for engaging in deeper, more enduring relationships. Which, at a school like the University of Chicago, can only improve a guy’s prospects.

But, as they say, this is the school where the only thing that goes down on you is your GPA, so don’t get your hopes up.

—Hallie Grumer

9

CHICAGO MAROON | VOICES | October 26, 2010

From NYC to La Jolla, College alum Daniel Aukin puts new work on stage AUKIN continued from page 7 ants, such as an egg-obsessed proprietor and a fanatic experimentalist.

“We just bit off more than we could chew,” Moore said. “The set was very elaborate. It was two levels that had to be lit in different directions. There was a stairway that was deliberately ramshackle, but still had to be safe for actors.

Whatever I did in my life, I could not go through that again.”

While they were very passionate about theater at the U of C, both Moore and Aukin fondly recall their academic experiences. “I was a Religion and the Humanities major, under Jay Z. Smith, and he was like blowing my mind on a weekly basis,” said Aukin. “And talking about story and narrative and how people can start an argument in a narrative and the politics of storytelling—in a certain way, as disparate as studying religion and making theater might seem at first glance, there were always crossovers.”

Following their graduation in 1993, Moore, Aukin, and Martin moved to Austin and founded the Physical Plant, a small theater company that grew to become a venerable venue in Austin’s thriving theater scene. Later, in 1998, Aukin became the artistic director of New York City’s Soho Rep, a company whose mission was, and

still is, to produce little-known contemporary plays and new works.

With only one other employee working at Soho Rep and significant financial concerns looming for the company, Aukin faced a difficult challenge in his new job.

“The first thing I did was hire an executive director at a full-time salary that we couldn’t afford. She knew that when she was hired. We didn’t know where the money was going to come from,” Aukin said.

However, once Aukin and the new executive director, Alexandra Conley, started to produce plays, the Soho Rep’s prospects began to turn around.

“I think the financial stability followed the work, as is often the case,” said current Artistic Director Sarah Benson, who had worked at Soho under Aukin. “Daniel focused on doing a few things remarkably well,” she added. “I think that that was a really smart decision on his and Alexandra’s part.”

As Aukin directed and produced more plays in New York, he began to build a team of frequent collaborators, which included actors, designers, and playwrights. Designer Louisa Thompson, who was one such collaborator, recalled that Aukin was particularly skilled at adapting new plays to Soho’s smallish space. “You’re dealing

with so many limitations, it kind of forces you to get to an idea that can hold an entire production,” she said.

One play that required Thompson and Aukin to take particularly daring risks was a play titled [sic] by Melissa Gibson, another frequent collaborator. Produced in 2001, the play explored the trials and heartbreaks of intellectual, creative twentysomethings, and the design combined both realist and surrealist elements. Within the general setting of an apartment building, the apartments the main characters occupied were represented by small, movable boxes while another apartment housing a constantly quarreling couple was represented more realistically.

Writing for The New York Times, Bruce Weber, like many other critics, approved of the ambitious design, which “works like a vise to squeeze the verbal stream of frustrations out of the characters.”

In 2006, after working for eight years to expand productions and raise artists’ fees at Soho Rep, Daniel decided to step down from his position to pursue new projects.

“Part of it was I felt like I had taken the company an awful long way and I could see what I thought was the next step for the company,” Aukin said. “And I just needed to step away from that kind of institution building.”

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Now, Aukin is using his extensive experience directing new work to bring The Old Masters to the stage for the first time at Steppenwolf. As the show approached tech week, there were still a few big decisions to be made, such as whether or not a monologue made it into the next draft or whether the characters order pizza or Chinese food on page 32 (which is much more important than you might think).

But these are exactly the kinds of questions that the New Look series is designed to help playwrights answer. Like the Soho Rep, Steppenwolf is dedicated to bringing new work to the stage, and New Look allows playwrights to gain new perspective as they see their works produced and performed.

Aukin is visibly passionate and dedicated to this kind of work, but you would be hard pressed to distinguish between work and fun after watching him joke with his staff or smile when something on stage goes almost exactly right.

After announcing that he “loved” the scene that had just wrapped up, one of the actors onstage turned to him and said, in a sarcastic deadpan, “I need you to tell me you love it more often.” Aukin instantly broke out into a chuckle, made a lighthearted remark, and then moved on to the next scene.

CLASSIFIEDS Classified advertising in the C HICAGO M AROON is $3 for each line. Lines are 45 characters long including spaces and punctuation. Special headings are 20-character lines at $4 per line. Classifieds are not accepted over the phone, and they must be paid in advance. Submit all ads in person, by e-mail, or by mail to the C HICAGO M AROON , Ida Noyes Hall, Lower Level Rm 026, 1212 E. 59th St., Chicago, IL 60637 attn: Classified Ads. Deadlines: Wednesdays and Fridays, 12 P . M ., prior to publication.

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10

CHICAGO MAROON | VOICES | October 26, 2010

The Fun Corner.

Tips and hints from your fellow students. Submit to grind@ChicagoMaroon.com and see yours published in next Tuesday's MAROON.

B63

:T

W S

Dear midterms week: You don't have to do this. It doesn't have to be this way.

To the beagle I keep seeing on 53rd: Thou art majestic. I respect you.

To the girl who wore red rights two days in a row: I noticed. Everyone noticed.

I know I should be supporting local businesses, but I can't help it. Chipotle is better than Maravillas.

To Martha Nussbaum: You are the Anna Wintour of philosophy.

To my dad: No, there is nowhere I want to eat on 53rd Street.

Dear Ted O'Neill's hair: Seriously. How do you do it?

To T-Lex: You are a destroyer of worlds.

To Majorette Tom: I know I seemed like a bad conversationalist but you should've heard the witty repartee I thought up shortly after you walked away.

Dear Bert: You are my favorite drunk.

Keep truckin'.

Dear Saffron: Your butter chicken has gotten far too red.

5`\2 ]T bVS

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Solution for 10/22 puzzle

Solution for 10/22 puzzle

Sudoku is provided by Laura Taalman (A.B. '94) and Philip Riley (A.B. '94).

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11

CHICAGO MAROON | SPORTS | October 26, 2010

VOLLEYBALL

MEN’S SOCCER

Chicago back on track at Elmhurst

Another late goal gets best of Maroons

By Jake Grubman MAROON Staff For a team that had lost three of its last five matches, three wins this weekend did wonders to help the Maroons put the recent rough stretch in their rearview mirror as the postseason approaches.

20th-ranked Chicago (25–9) won three of its four matches Friday and Saturday at the Elmhurst Invitational, including a key win over 15th-ranked UW–Oshkosh, to get the Maroons back on track heading into the final part of the season.

“We refocused on some things, and we played really well as a team,” head coach Vanessa Walby said. “It kind of feels back to normal.”

Third-year Isis Smalls represented the Maroons on the All-Tournament Team with consistent hitting and strong blocking throughout the tournament, and Walby also pointed to the team’s middle hitters and strong defense for the showing.

“It was a team effort. Give credit to the middle blockers, this weekend especially.”

Walby noted that “they’ve worked a lot with blocking... and they’re always a steady force in the middle. If our middles can close the block, it makes it easy for the defense to play around them.”

Chicago’s lineup was tested by Cornell’s big front line in the first match of the weekend, but the Maroons adjusted to win 3–1.

With Wash U, Emory, and NYU all boasting size on the front line, the South Siders’ success against Cornell could bode well for the UAA tournament on November 5 and 6.

“We figured it out, mixed up shots pretty well, made good adjustments, pushed forward instead of waiting two, three, four points to adjust,” Walby said.

UW–Platteville gave the Maroons trouble in the second match of the day, the first time these teams have met since 1992. Riding a nine-match winning streak, the 25th-ranked Pioneers topped Chicago 3–1, with all three of their wins coming by just two points.

From there, the Maroons took on a familiar opponent, defeating Wheaton for the third time this season, this time taking the match 3–1. With the Thunder playing characteristically resilient defense, the Maroons responded with a strong defensive performance of their own, led by second-year Sam Brown’s 22 digs.

The Maroons followed that win with one of the most important wins of the season, toppling UW–Oshkosh 3–1. After nearmisses against higher-ranked Wash U and Emory, the Maroons hit .400 for the match to beat the nation’s 15th-ranked team, a big upset for a team that will likely need to beat two higher-ranked opponents to have a chance at the UAA title.

“That’s a good win for us, it was good to finish,” Walby said. “We’ve played a lot of teams that have been ranked ahead of us, and we’ve had good matches, but we haven’t been able to finish. So it was nice to play consistently and well against a team ranked ahead of us, so the girls can see what that feels like.”

The Maroons will get another shot at UW–Platteville next weekend at the IllinoisWesleyan Tournament, where they will also meet Monmouth and North Park for three important regional matches over two days.

Walby said the team is expecting a 4–0 finish at the tournament, a result that would bolster Chicago’s résumé for NCAA bid selections and send them into the UAAs on a high note.

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By Matt Luchins Sports Staff It’s a new week but the same story for men’s soccer as a goal in the 89th minute doomed the Maroons to a 1-0 defeat at sixthranked University of Wisconsin-Whitewater last Friday, marking the fourth consecutive road game in which the Maroons have lost at the last minute to ranked opponents.

“I thought overall we played very well, especially on defense,” coach Scott Wiercinski said. “We talked about keeping the ball away from their danger players and we did that perfectly. They saw a lot of the ball in their own half and midfield, but we gave them very little room to work in attack.”

Though third-year Chris Giusto made four saves to the Warhawks’ one, the Maroons (7-6-1) had the better of the game’s chances as fourth-year Alex Clifford blasted two of the team’s six shots off the woodwork.

“When we won the ball, we countered them quickly and created a lot of chances,” added Wiercinski. “Not necessarily chances that show up in the box score, but we had a lot of crosses that were played a little too deep or through balls that didn’t quite find their man, but represented good opportunities.”

The defense limited the Warhawks (11-1-2) to a season-low five shots, but despite impressing at both ends of the field, a clinical finish from Sean Gilbert settled the game.

“The goal was really weird,” Wiercinski said. “It came a few minutes after a sequence where we had strung together 10 or 11 passes and then hit the post. From the goal kick they were able to play it up to a forward, whose shot was deflected straight to someone who was waiting for it and ready to put it right in the corner. Sometimes you have to make your own luck, but it was really unfortunate coming after we had put together such a good move.”

The Maroons will round out the regularseason with three conference games.

They start with their first home game in four weeks this Friday against New York University (8-2-3, 2-0-2), who come in unranked despite leading the UAA. Although finding themselves at the opposite end of the conference table, on paper this is likely the Maroons’ easiest game in a month and a win could catapult them from seventh to third in the UAA. A home win against a shaky Brandeis team the following week could make the regularseason finale at Washington University a winner-takes-all battle for the conference championship and the NCAA Tournament spot that comes with it.

As Wiercinski pointed out, “If you don’t get the UAA’s automatic bid, it’s a completely at-large process [for making the NCCA Tournament]. They use all kinds of factors to compare teams, so I don’t know exactly how we would stack up. That means that from our perspective, a win against NYU is very important.”

Strong showing augurs successful seasons for swim teams SWIMMING continued from back page the 400-yard freestyle.

These performances are especially impressive since Boston College is a Division I team.

According to Katherine Crain, “The team did a great job rising up to the challenge of a Division I competitor, Boston College, and an even better job beating a fellow Division III competitor, Wheaton.”

Tara Levens added, “We were within reach of Boston College, which is great considering how early it is in the season. We also did much better against Wheaton than ever before—last year the women’s team only beat them by five points.”

The team is in almost universal agreement that this is an auspicious beginning. As Beck Schimdt explains, “I think our ability to perform so well against such stiff competition this early in the season bodes very well for Chicago!”

However, it is too early for the two teams to rest on their laurels. Jason Weber points out that there are some “technical things with racing and strokes” that the men have to address.

Nick Santoro explains the measures the team is taking to improve these small faults: “Our team will continue to re-analyze race strategy and improve endurance and stroke fundamentals through tough training. At 20-plus hours a week, our team’s practice schedule is on par with several Division I programs.” Ultimately, according to Santoro, “we expect to compete at a very high level because of this.”

At the end of the day, though, both teams did a fantastic job, and according to Santoro, nothing captures the collective sentiment quite so poignantly as “Still Dre” by Dr. Dre, featuring Snoop Dogg. To quote the Good Doctor, “I’ll break your neck, damn near put your face in your lap/ try to be the king but the ace is back.”

So, Maroon fans, get the word out: The ace is back. Go cheer them on this Saturday as they take on Illinois Tech at the Myers-McLoraine Pool.

Maroons not scared to host 7—0 Case on Halloween weekend FOOTBALL continued from back page The record is no accident, according to Maloney. “I’d say we spend three times as much time on special teams than most teams in the country. The players believe in what we’re doing.”

Maloney echoed the sentiments of Polanczky that while the record is not something they actively pursue, the Maroons will continue to be aggressive on special teams. “We’d love to return a punt for a touchdown every game,” laughed Maloney.

The Maroons begin conference play next week in a hotly anticipated matchup against the undefeated Spartans of Case Western at Stagg Field. Brizzollara downplayed the importance of playing a dangerous Case squad. “[We’ll prepare] the same way we do every week. We’ll make adjustments, put in new plays we think would be effective, and prepare as best we can to beat them. It’s just another game.”

Gormley’s strong play continues with shutout against 15th-ranked Pointers W. SOCCER continued from back page Chicago is the first team to shut the Pointers out this year with goalie Emma Gormley’s second shutout in a row and the sixth of her season. She made six saves on Sunday in comparison to Pointer Liz Hunter’s three. But it’s not just the Maroon defense that contributed to a deadlock against this top-ranked team.

“We were in the game the whole time, winning 50-50 balls in the midfield despite their pushing and rough play,” Hegel said.

Chicago dominated the game’s first half

as well as both periods of overtime play, outshooting the Pointers 10-5 and 5-1 respectively. The most solid assault from Wisconsin came during the second half, when they outshot the Maroons 11-1 but still could not get past Chicago’s powerhouse defense.

Such a great performance against a topranked team bodes well for Chicago’s future in conference play. UAA games resume Friday with a home game against the NYU Violets.

The Maroons remain ranked first in UAA Conference.

IN QUOTES

SPORTS

“A Mr. Brett Favre stopped by and dropped off this picture of a hot dog.”

—Kenneth, speaking to Jenna on last week’s 30 Rock.

FOOTBALL

Special teams dominate in win over Kenyon

By Moe Bahrani Sports Contributor Kenyon is nobody’s idea of a powerhouse football team. The Lords were annihilated last week by seventh-ranked Wittenberg, losing 52-0 while giving up 655 yards of total offense. The Maroons, however, took nothing for granted and came out swinging in their final game before conference play to win 35–14.

The Maroons struck first when fourth-year quarterback Marshall Oium, in his second game back from an injury, connected with fellow fourth-year Clay Wolff from 19 yards out halfway through the first quarter.

“Clay and I have developed such a great connection with each other that we always read the coverage the same and are thinking the same thing on routes.” Said Oium, “I can probably throw to him with my eyes closed.”

A 19-yard run from fourth-year Tommy Parks put the Maroons up 14-0 later in the quarter. The Maroons took a stranglehold on the game at the end of the quarter with an 80-yard bomb from Oium to second-year Dee Brizzolara.

“It was a simple post route with Clay running a deep out underneath me. Both the safety and corner cov-

Saturday, 10/23

Chicago 35 Kenyon 14 The Maroons scored off a blocked punt for the fifth time this season, tying an NCAA D-III season record and giving Chicago its fifth win.

ered him and I was left wide open down the field,” said Brizzolara. “I don’t think it broke [the game] open, but it definitely put us in a comfort zone being up by 21.”

Being ahead early was one of the goals head coach Richard Maloney set for his team going into Friday’s game. Last year the Maroons had to come back from 18 points down in the fourth quarter to win, and given that Kenyon had yet to win a game, Maloney did not want to give the Lords any extra motivation. “Coming out fast against a team like that is important. We scored 21 points on 19 offensive plays, so I think we accomplished that goal,” said Maloney.

Oium agreed that coming out early was a major priority for the Maroons, not just last Friday, but in every game that the Maroons play: “We try to jump on teams as early as possible and beat them physically and men-

WOMEN’S SOCCER

Second-year Alex Dzierbicki (front) and first-year Joshua Burandt (right) bring down a Denison rusher earlier this autumn at Stagg Field. This weekend, the team’s defense held Kenyon to 3.9 passing yards per attempt.

DARREN LEOW/MAROON

tally so they believe they have no chance of beating us.”

The rout turned historic in the second quarter. After pinning the Lords deep in their own territory, thirdyear Cameron Grimes blocked the Kenyon punt, which was retrieved

and returned for a touchdown by third-year Daniel Polanczsky, marking the fifth time the Maroons had returned a blocked punt for a touchdown this season. The score tied an NCAA Division III record set by Widener College in 1990.

“We had no clue that we tied any record,” said Polanczky. “But it’s pretty exciting… [this] should inspire our punt block team to turn up the aggressiveness and come out even harder against our UAA foes.”

FOOTBALL continued on page 11

SWIMMING

Pointers, Maroons play to scoreless draw Men and women split weekend meets

By David Kates Sports Staff

to spectacular defense from the Maroons’ backfield.

“Our back line players were definitely the MVPs of the game—I don’t remember Stevens Point getting any scary scoring opportunities because our defense was pressing them hard the whole game,” Hegel said.

“It’s especially impressive because Stevens Point has scored at least once in every other game they’ve played this season, but they couldn’t score on us!” continued Hegel.

Additionally, Stevens Points’s only loss came three few weeks ago in a 1–4 loss to Wheaton. The Thunder defeated the Maroons last month in a 1–0 game as well.

Men’s and women’s swimming kicked off their seasons this Saturday in back-to-back meets at the MyersMcLoraine Pool. The women’s team defeated Wheaton (Ill.) College 190.5 to 103.5, but sank against Boston College, 173 to 127. The same goes for the men, who drowned Wheaton 206 to 82, but were carried away by Boston College’s superior speed, 184 to 112.

Impressively, the women’s team had five individual first-place finishes.

Third-year Tara Levens stole the show in the 100-yard backstroke, as did second-years Katherine Crain and Becky Schmidt in the 1,000-yard freestyle and 1-meter dive, respectively.

First-year Vivian Yuen took the gold in the 200-yard backstroke along with fellow first-year Winifred Lau, who competed in the 100-yard butterfly.

Furthermore, Lau and Levens teamed up with second-years Kathleen Taylor and Andrea McPike to win the 400yard freestyle relay.

The men did well too. Fourth-year Ed Wagner took first place in the 100-yard backstroke. The gold medals for the 200-yard breaststroke and 200yard butterfly went to third-year Nick Santoro and second-year Charles Du, respectively. Lastly, the relay team of fourth-year James Schlabach, thirdyear Nick Santoro, second-year Kevin Yang, and first-year Eric Hallman won

W. SOCCER continued on page 11

SWIMMING continued on page 11

Third-year Allison Hegel fights for possession against North Park last week.

Tough defense held both teams scoreless in Sunday’s match.

DARREN LEOW/MAROON

By Gracie Sonnabend Sports Staff The Maroons dueled UW-Stevens Point (14-1-1) to a 0-0 tie in double overtime on Sunday.

“We had a really good game— we tied a team ranked #15 in the country and we could have beaten them with a little more luck in the final third,” commented third-year forward Allison Hegel.

The Pointers have had a spectacular season thus far, with Sunday’s shutout making a total of 13 games in which their opponents went scoreless. This game, though, was different: The Pointers couldn’t put anything on the scoreboard thanks

Second-year Bobby Morales plunges into the pool as the judges look on during the dive competition at Saturday’s home meet.

MATT BOGEN/MAROON