The Hemisphere of Liars

Page 1

GRIMES & JONES (art superiors)


If you are reading this, then congratulations. You have entered The Hemisphere of Liars... or at least shown a moderate interest in being near one. Either way, you’re not that much better than us. Just ask yourself, why? Why did this ever happen? What happened in the minds of two pasty faced Yorkshire dickheads to trigger this sort of behaviour? Why are you even reading it? ‘The Hemisphere of Liars’ is the debut novel by the poignant and muscular art duo Grimes & Jones. It is an encyclopaedia of all things crap and lumpy, lump an illumination of a world that is dark, dingy and full of wankers. Years of enduring bad breath and poor customer service has evoked a knee-jerk reaction; and this is it. If nothing else, you can rest assured that every scribbled line and half-baked sentiment found deliciously hidden within this book has been delivered with pure thoughtlessness and absolute contempt. Welcome to your fat nightmare.

Grimes & Jones


family


dentistry


dinosaurs


Greg Cherry was very very very very very important to his friends he drove a brown Mercedes Benz he stayed out late on Saturdays and hung around with all the gays he got himself in lots of trouble But what a man, and what a bubble.

greg cherry


love


work


germs


greg cherry



lesbians


the like duck chicken


hitler’s fanny


driving


wisdom


obesity


maths


acrobatics


birdwatching





pomp and circumstance


milk onions


irritable bowel syndrome


depression


morals


woodland creatures


height


marriage


soul music


the internet


missing persons


imbeciles


the kissing disease


tits


zumba classes


suffrojets


old people


gordon’s gin


medicine


husbands and wives


nightmares


cures


the prime minister


school dinners


the truth


cereal


disability


pornography


Mum, Family 2013

“Excellent”

Mr Burns, The Simpsons

“This book really helped me to realise just how old i am getting” The Old Baby

“Like a dream where somebody gives you a big cheque, but then you wake up poor and fugly ” Foggy, The Wagglers Weekly

“Hot, tasty and crammed full of the best locally sourced lies on the market. ” Ingrid Hump, Feminist


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