Marianna “Muffin” H.M. O’Brien March 28, 1930 – January 9, 2021 by Thomas B. Hoopes ’79, P’18 and David W. Rimmer ’79
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n January the Groton School community lost a dear friend in Muffin O’Brien, a woman who contributed to the school in numerous ways: as a faculty spouse, sports fan, social organizer, dorm parent and affiliate, faculty mentor, and form mother. So many were touched by her warmth and support during her twenty-five years at the school, including students, parents, faculty, and trustees—but especially the advisees or English students of her husband Junie, players on his baseball or hockey teams, and, later, the female students she brought under her wing through one of the most welcoming kitchens on campus. We consider ourselves fortunate to have known that love and, like so many others, are forever grateful. Muffin arrived at Groton in the fall of 1955 after a summer marriage to Junie, who had been teaching and coaching at the school since 1948. They, along with Charlie ’44 and Clare Rimmer, were the first couples to run a dormitory, the newly renovated Pest House, which was divided into two separate wings. A few years and a child or two later, the O’Brien family settled into the brick house on Farmers Row across from the Dining Hall, with the Rimmers eventually moving into the white one next door. With nine children between the two families, there was constant traffic between the two houses. But it was that brick house, more than any other on campus, that became a home away from home for countless students, often offering a fresh batch of chocolate chip cookies, warm from the oven. It was a refuge for adolescents navigating the rigors and challenges of boarding school life, whether they were relaxing over games at “Parlor” or teammates enjoying some homemade food after a game. Sports were often featured, whether bumper pool, ping-pong, a Bruins game on TV, or the occasional street-hockey game in the driveway and garage, with Junie’s seemingly endless cardboard boxes of books acting as the goal. Following a 1969–70 sabbatical year in London, Muffin, with her four children growing and in school full time, took on a greater role with the school, while
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Junie moved from the classroom and athletic venues to focus on development and alumni affairs. Headmaster Rowland Cox hired Muffin the year he came to Groton, and she served on the Women’s Committee when girls first arrived in 1975. Muffin and other faculty spouses’ subtle influence and support helped guide the school through that transition. Muffin also started the Student Activities Committee, was director of special events and student affairs, and later, as special assistant to Headmaster Bill Polk ’58, became greatly involved in planning new student orientation, Parents Weekend, Reunion Weekend, the school birthday, and numerous other events. After the O’Briens retired from Groton in 1980, Muffin continued her work in the secondary school world, founding a consulting business with Junie in Boston to help families navigate secondary school placement and also continuing as a trustee of Miss Porter’s School, where she eventually served as interim head during 1992–93. From the perspective of two lifelong family friends and Groton alums, it is abundantly clear that what delighted Muffin most was bringing family, friends, former students, and faculty together, embracing and sustaining long-standing relationships emblematic of those formed at Groton School. That embrace was no stronger or more inviting than through the O’Briens’ Edgartown house on Martha’s Vineyard, which she and her wonderful family opened to many for more than fifty years. Like the iconic brick house on Farmers Row, “Havoc House” (as it came to be known), framed by the harbor and Muffin’s beautiful flower garden, was an enduring symbol of the hospitality, warmth, and love that defined her life. Muffin spent her final years there, where she was happiest sitting on the porch on a warm summer evening and looking out over the harbor, surrounded by her children, grandchildren, former students, and family friends, enjoying the warm conversation and laughter filling the air. We all will miss Muffin’s unconditional hospitality, radiant smile, and friendship.
