Connect Through The Magic of Storytelling

by Christa Melnyk Hines

“Why do you have a badger skin?” inquired my six-year-old nephew.

My family, along with a small group of other adults and children, formed a semicircle in the shadowy quiet of a reconstructed Native American encampment earth lodge at a children’s nature center. Christine Freeman, an employee, had been guiding us through the Kanza Indians’ lifestyle, showing us how the Plains’ tribe crafted bows and arrows and used turtle shells for soup bowls and as calendars.

She reached over and picked up the skin. “This is actually a raccoon,” she said as she placed it over her shoulder. Sitting down, she ran her hand along the fluffy, circled tail. “If you have time for a story, I’ll tell you how the animals worked out night and day,” she said.

We all leaned in a little closer.

By listening to Freeman recount the myth about the animals, we learned how Native Americans taught their children why days are split into nighttime and daytime.

Freeman, who is also a mom of two adult sons, knows that her audience is more likely to listen and retain the information when she weaves information into a story. “Storytelling is ageless. It appeals to everyone,” she says. “With children, it’s a great way to catch their attention.” alone in our human experiences. Stories serve to entertain, inspire, teach compassion and other values, and stoke admiration and respect for the generations of individuals who came before us. Studies also show that storytelling enhances a child’s language development, emergent reading, and comprehension skills.

“A story is a way to be in connection with our children and be in empathy and sympathy with them without giving advice or laying down the law,” says Robin Moore, professional storyteller and author of Creating a Family Storytelling Tradition: Awakening the Hidden Storyteller.

A penny for your thoughts? Nicole Keck, mom of three boys, ages 6, 4, and 2, found storytelling is like a window into her children’s minds. Her sons take turns telling stories before bedtime. “(The stories) may be funny or serious, true or fiction. We like that it gives us precious insights into what they’re thinking about,” Keck says. “Knowing what makes them tick is an invaluable tool in guiding and supporting them. Besides, they’re very witty, and it’s just great entertainment!”

Expand creativity. Just like imaginative play, stories help children sort through problems and work through issues. “The more stories that kids can relate to others, the more ability they have to use their imagination and to become problem solvers,” says Joyce Slater, a professional storyteller and performing arts teacher.

“My favorite thing about storytelling has to be showing my kids how fun it is to really embrace one’s own creativity and not to be shy about exploring and sharing one’s imagination,” says Kevin Doyle, a children’s book author and father of two, ages 7 and 3. He began telling stories to his daughter when she was just a toddler.

Doyle’s children especially desire imaginative, adventurous stories with pretend characters. “Those are my favorite to think up and the kids’ favorites to hear. Bedtime is our primary storytime. That’s the best time to unwind and help everyone relax,” he says.

As an author, Doyle knows a thing or two about spinning yarns that appeal to kids. However, you don’t have to be a professional storyteller to entertain your kids with your tales.

Tell life stories. Kids love to hear about parents’ adventures when they were kids. In particular, family stories shape a child’s understanding of his family’s values, a sense of right and wrong, and appropriate social behavior both in the family and in the world.

“One of the stories that kids should always know is the story about their birth,” Slater says. “‘What was the day like? Who was there? Why do I have this name?’ It becomes a real self-identifying process if you know how you came into being and why somebody chose your name.”

Encourage listening. Most of all, storytelling creates space for you to connect with your children. Begin with books. “Find a subject that you like, read the story, and then talk about it. It’s a great way to open up a conversation with your children,” Freeman says. “Listen to each other. Sometimes we don’t listen enough. There’s nothing wrong with just sitting and talking.”

Other Segues to Storytelling:

Use a puppet or act out a story instead of reading it.

When your child asks a question, try providing the answer in story form.

Look through the family photo album together and share stories about the people in the photos.

Play charades to tell a story.

Take turns pulling an object out of a box or bag and telling a story about the object.

Integrate old photos into your home: the decor of grandparents, interesting relatives, or ancestors to spark storytelling opportunities.