Quakers Do it in Silence, Gwendoline Da Sousa Correa

So yes, fast forward to late May, when classes were completely done, apart from bits and pieces of the latest edition of the G-You Magazine ‘Up in the Air’. One of my bestest friends, Sara, who stayed in Portugal for uni studying Economics (random fast fact), asked if I wanted to join her and her uni friends in going down the coast. This trip was always something we’ve spoken about doing together since we had fi nished high school so I said I DO. Not knowing the people that were going was a little nerve-wrecking, especially for my anxiety-amused self, BUT knowing my friend Sara: she would only be with revitalizing people.

After a massive quarantine, I mean massive in all ways possible, it was time for me to turn off from my, let’s say, “Glasgow duties” and “family duties”, and tune in with the ocean, friends and the book Half of a Yellow Sun (which I highly recommend btw). We stayed in three different AirBnB’s along the way which I recommend if you do this trip because 1) it saves you from moving every day to a new place which wastes so much precious beach time and 2) if you’re a big enough group like us (8-9 people) time to do things takes foreeeeever!! Other than that our plans were to wake up with at least 5-6h of sleep (great, young-adult standards we know), eat, beach, dine and drink wine! Jk, that was just for the rhyme. We didn’t actually drink much wine, we drank Super Bock (the most wonderful Portuguese beer [lots of it]) and home-made Sangria! And that was it. It was ‘simple stupid’ as one of my 6th grade teachers would say. It was beautiful and silent.

The sunsets, sunrises, the conversations, and friendships that made the trip what it was, provided all the noise I needed, and little did I know how much I needed it. There were two memorable moments, one when we were on our second beach day and all I remember was listening to the ocean with my book in my hand and feeling this immense feeling of happiness like nothing else mattered; the other time was when we were in the car listening to Father John Misty’s ‘Chateau Lobby #4 (in C for Two Virgins)’ on our way to the beach after an intense drinking and fun night, again the same feeling of happiness which I hadn’t felt in a VERY long time. I really cannot explain the various ways this road trip healed me. I hadn’t properly slowed down for three freaking years (the rhythm at which I usually live is considered crazy for many) and before the trip, quarantine had helped me see a lot of things in hindsight. Going down the coast was defi nitely a sound fi lter that I desperately needed and yet I hadn’t realised it until I was in it. Even the music playlists we listened to during the trip refl ected a part of me that was way deep under my skin, yet I had lost the will and way to listen to it these past three years. The people which I didn’t know are now friends who I know I can count on for life. My friend Sara is my sister from another mister. And the Portuguese Southwestern coast will forever be my refuge, my home and have a place in my heart.

Quakers Do it in Silence

GWENDOLINE DA SOUSA CORREA

I love noise. Like, really bloody love noise. My main hobbies include public speaking and music, activities defi ned by their noise. And yet, as much as I love that noise, I have spent my life as a Quaker, worshiping in the silence.

The silence is magical. Once all the talking, music, hustle, and bustle stop, all that is left is a peaceful bliss that puts me far more in touch with myself then any amount of talking about myself ever has.

A Quaker meeting is set out with chairs in a circle around a central table with fl owers and religious texts for people to look at during the meeting. We sit in silence, not praying, but waiting for that of God within us to speak. Quakers don’t typically externalise their God. They/it is simply a concept to describe that voice within us that guides us through life’s trials and tribulations. Some people don’t even say God, they just talk about the goodness and light guiding us from within. The whole idea is just to observe and question our world and thoughts with what we trust is good.

It’s a wonderful feeling. Just to let go, to stop trying to solve everything, and just let your mind wander through whatever it wants to. Just letting go and accepting your thoughts and feelings.

And all ideas, actions, and convictions are considered equal within Quakerism. No one person out-ranks someone else and no meeting or contribution is more important. We have no priests or clergy. There is no set belief system. So much so that Quakers in Britain are a religious charity rather than a church as it is totally up to you how you interpret the silence. Traditionally we don’t pray but if someone were to come along and pray within the silence there would be no problem with that. We have no festivals or set day of worship as no day can be more sacred than another. Weddings are just normal meetings. And as no one is more or less important, everyone in attendance signs the wedding certifi cate as a witness. The silence is a truly equalising force, allowing us to experience our own version of faith, together.

Now, Quaker silence isn’t quiet. I know, the whole thing is an oxymoron. We sit in silence and, if we feel moved by the spirit or conviction of feeling, we share. We stand up and give our ministry to our fellow worshipers. And with no hierarchy in sight, absolutely anyone can share.

The whole idea is very alien for most people who haven’t experienced it. That you are in a room full of people, you stand up and you can say anything that has been on your mind, and then sit back down and the silence continues. It’s insanely nerve-wracking and, despite having spent my life familiar with the concept, getting no feedback to your contribution is odd. But the freedom? Now that is liberating. The rest of the meeting don’t have to understand, they don’t even have to try and help, but if you feel it keenly enough and feel moved to share, they will listen.