Roc Parent & She Rocs March/April 2018 by RocParent

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Roc Parent Magazine

March/April 2018

Join us at Camp Fair on Sunday, April 8

Roc Publishing LLC Roc Parent | She Rocs 2280 East Ave. Rochester, NY 14610 (585) 348-9712 Salley Thornton Publisher Dresden Engle Managing Editor Sara Hickman-Himes Art Director/Designer Lindsay Warren Baker Calendar Editor

Since the magazine’s beginning nearly a quarter of a century ago, we have hosted the annual Summer Activity and Camp Fair at Eastview Mall in the early spring. That tradition continues this year on Sunday, April 8. Once the Easter Bunny leaves his center court post, dozens of camps and attractions hop into place for an energetic day. As parents you’ll have the opportunity to meet camp representatives and learn more about options available for your child—whether the traditional sleep-away camp with cabins, or more hands-on day camps that teach computer coding or acting skills. There are camps for sports and sailing, martial arts and music, dancing and do-it-yourself pottery, and of course much more. We remember the summer fun of heading to camp. Those life-long friend we made and the life skills we learned. Simple experiences with profound effects on us as we grew—the lessons more willingly learned by someone else other than parents. We’ve listed 30 of our top favorite in Christina Katz’ article “What I learned at summer camp ... ” on page 38. So now we give that to our own kids ... to help them become more wellrounded humans. And maybe just as much so we can have a few minutes to ourselves this summer. We all win.

Paul Olcott Business and Distribution Manager Photographers Nancy Carr Dresden Engle Miguel Samper FEATURED WRITERS Breanna Banford Dresden Engle Christina Katz Dawn Kellogg Sally Parker Linda Quinlan Tom Rand Vonjula Thompson Leslie Youngblood Deena Viviani COLUMNISTS Dr. Amy Jerum Deanna King ADVERTISING Salley Thornton salley@rocparent.com

Salley Thornton Publisher 4

March/April 2018

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Dresden Engle Managing Editor

Linda Covington linda@rocparent.com

WRITERS IN THIS ISSUE AMY JERUM, DNP, CPNP-PC, PMHS, is a doctorally prepared pediatric nurse practitioner and board-certified pediatric mental health specialist. She is also the mother of three boys (11, 11, and 13 — wow, right?). She gets asked a lot of questions about healthcare and parenting and now she’s sharing her answers with Roc Parent readers. She is the director of Workforce Development at URMC Complex Care Center, a faculty member of CAP-PC (Child and Adolescent Psychiatry for Primary Care), and assistant professor of Clinical Nursing at University of Rochester, School of Nursing. CHRISTINA KATZ is a freelance writer, author, journalist and writing coach. She spent ample time outdoors as a child, which fostered her love of nature, gardening and trees. She believes children of all ages deserve to regularly experience the wonders and richness of the wilds

DEENA VIVIANI works by day as a young adult services librarian at Brighton Memorial Library and by night she writes for children. She has a bachelor’s degree in Creative Writing and Communications from SUNY Brockport and a master’s degree in Library Science from the University at Buffalo. Deena is a fan of traveling, Muppets, Project Runway, and baking gluten-free recipes. She lives in Rochester with her young daughter, musician husband, and a large number of guitars, computers and, of course, books. TOM RAND is a senior an Irondequoit High School, where he is the editor-in-chief of his school’s newspaper, a title he also holds with a literary magazine he founded titled “Chickenscratch” (ihschickenscratch.wordpress.com). He plans to study journalism in college.

COLUMNS

Flipping over Gymnastics Training Center Celebrating 30 years as a local institution

28 Ask Dr. Amy What to do when you feel like your kid’s ATM

Sensory-friendly shows Local arts groups embrace all audiences Special camps for special needs A focus on four local camps Rochester mom invents Vidget chair Sandra Turner helps kids rock their worlds

30 Book Nook April is National Humor Month 32 The Cynical Mother School fundraisers = stress for mom plus lame prizes EE

DAWN KELLOGG is the communications manager for Geva Theatre Center. She has been in the arts for most of her life and considers herself very lucky to work in an industry that she loves.

6 10 11 12 14 18 24 35 38 40 71

FEATURES

DEANNA KING is the mother of three pleasant surprises ages seven, 10, and 17. Clearly, she isn’t good at family planning, but has mastered the art of writing — especially the honest truth about parenting. She created the blog CynicalMother.com several years ago. King also worked for more than a decade in Rochester in TV news as a reporter and producer. Nowadays, Deanna’s sarcastic wit can be heard every morning on The Brother Wease Show on Radio 95.1.

CONTENTS

Terrific Teens Roc Parent introduces three terrific teens and two pre-teens

MARCH/APRIL 2018

ROCPA

24th Annual

Summer Activity CamP Fair Sunday, April 8

11 am 6 pm Eastview

Curated calender A guide to family fun — full calendar at rocparent.com Play = Learning Pal-Mac schools embrace play each day Summer Camp & Activity Guide Life skills you learn at camp 30 things you can pack up and take home YMCA’s happy campers “The best summer ever” Pediatric Dentistry Special Section Roc Parent Magazine

Mall, Victor

SUMMER 2018

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Dance • Music Special needs• • Educational Enrichment Coding • • Art Outdoor Activities • Gymnastics • Drama & Theatre

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ON THE COVER

Zoe Dae Ferraro, left, is featured as one of our Terrific Teens on page 14. She is a senior at Bishop Kearney High School. On right is Olivia Rowcliffe, a senior at Victor High School, who is a summer counselor with YMCA’s Camp Cory, located on Keuka Lake in the Finger Lakes. PHOTO BY MIGUEL SAMPER

March/April 2018

gymnastics training center

flips into 30th year

Dream-come-true continues for Sarah Jane Clifford By LINDA QUINLAN

Her dream was to open a gym and have the best gymnastics facility that could be built. And more than 30 years later, Sarah Jane Clifford’s dream has long been realized. She opened the Gymnastics Training Center (GTC) in rented space across from Penfield’s Panorama Plaza on Oct. 7, 1987. An indoor pool was filled in to give her a total of 8,000-square-feet of space. She soon had 800 students and a waiting list of 750. Six years later, she put together a loan package for $1.2 million and built the 22,000-square-foot, state-of-the-art

PHOTOS PROVIDED BY SARAH JANE CLIFFORD

March/April 2018

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“After we opened, everything I had ever dreamed about came true” —SARAH JANE CLIFFORD

facility in June 1994, which that still houses the center today. GTC is located at 2051 Fairport Nine Mile Point Road, just north of Route 441, in Penfield.

The center currently serves 1,500 to 2,000 students a year, and still often has a waiting list. “After we opened, everything I had ever dreamed about came true,” Clifford said. The center is open every day but Sunday — 9 a.m. to 9 p.m. Monday through Thursday; 9 a.m. to 7:30 p.m. Friday, and 9 a.m. to 3 p.m. Saturday. Some, like 9-year-old Madison Van Gorder of Fairport, train there three hours a day, three days a week. Madison originally was following in her older sister’s gymnastics footsteps, Madison says, but has continued since her sister moved on.

“I like Sarah Jane and how she cares about everyone,” Madison said. “She is understanding when you are having trouble with something — or me, it was a tuck — and helps you get through it,” Madison admitted she is still “afraid” of the narrow balance beam. She wants to be really good at the uneven bars, but said her favorite is tumbling during the floor exercise. The program at the center is regimented, said Madison’s mom, Tammy Van Gorder, “But there are no drill sergeants here ... It’s very welcoming and there’s a lot of flexibility in the program. They (students) have a fun time and enjoy what they’re doing. They make great friendships, too!” Clifford’s niece, Megan Clifford, 11, agreed. She has been attending classes at the center since the age of 2. “There are a lot of people you can count on here,” Megan said, noting she would like to follow in her aunt’s footsteps and teach someday, too.

Following her passions

Clifford tumbled into gymnastics later in life than most of her students. She spent her early years in Princeton, N.J., where

she said her parents involved her in several activities — horseback riding, ballet, swimming, skiing, skating — to get her out of the house, where she was “bouncing off the walls.” She noted that today she may have been

diagnosed with ADHD (Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder) as a child. But she said she was “blessed” to be successful in everything she tried.

Roc Parent Magazine

See GTC on page 8

March/April 2018

"Begin Here, Go Anywhere" Summer Program June 25 - August 25

• 1/2 Day and Full Day Camps (AM/PM) • Summer Classes • Gymnastics • Pre-School • Ballet • Cheer/Tumbling • Trampoline Classes • Ages 1 to Adult • For Boys & Girls I 1 1 Drmomtl•aJJrollicir f

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Sarah Jane Clifford, left, with her mom, Ellie Bernhardt, who is 102. PHOTO BY SARAH JANE CLIFFORD

GTC, from page 7 When her father was transferred to Rochester via a pharmaceutical company with which he worked, Clifford auditioned for the former Botsford School of Dance. She was told she was too short for the company (at her current height of five-foot, three inches) and it was suggested she try gymnastics. She did. Her gymnastics coach saw her desire and within a month, Clifford went from training one day a week to five days a week. She progressed at a rapid pace and was put on a gymnastics team, while she also continued diving, horseback riding, and ski racing. After graduating from Pittsford schools, Clifford attended Ithaca College, where she continued to compete in gymnastics. She also was able to continue horseback riding at Cornell University, and still took dance lessons and skied. She graduated magna cum laude. Since her parents had by then relocated to Atlanta, Clifford went to live with them after college and started training and teaching with the Atlanta School of Gymnastics, which at the time was a national training center.

Returning to Rochester

� QYMNASTICS TRAINING CENTER OF�. INC.

©GTC 2018

www.gtc-rochester.com • 585-388-8686 2051 Fairport Nine Mile Point Rd. • Penfield (Rt 250, North of Rt 441)

She moved back to Rochester after two years, and at one point was working five jobs — for recreation programs in Henrietta, Irondequoit and Pittsford; running a nursery school in Irondequoit, and waitressing. “It got crazy,” she said with a laugh. A young man, Tim, who had been unsuccessful in asking her out for a date, actually enrolled in one of her gymnastics classes in Henrietta to get her attention. She finally said “yes,” to a date, five weeks later. They were married in 1989 and she has two stepchildren. In addition to running GTC, she currently is also a full-time caregiver for her husband, who had a serious motorcycle accident. She called the accident “a life-changing moment that gave me more patience and strength.” She said she also learned it’s OK “not to do it all.” Today, Clifford teaches the advanced classes at GTC while also owning and running the Botsford School of Dance, which she purchased in 2001, and Fit By Five, a preschool program she bought in 1999. 8

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Education is key

Clifford believes education is a way of life and it remains one of her passions. “I truly appreciate Sarah Jane’s commitment to academics, and to safety,” said parent Kristine Robertson, who has three children in the GTC program — two daughters, ages 11 and 10, and her 8-year-old son. “While goal-setting is important here,” Robertson said, “athletics and staying healthy are, too. It’s not a focus on gymnastics at all costs.” Clifford has been to six Olympics as a “friend to athletes” and as a spectator, and also has traveled to 10 world championships. While some of her Atlanta gymnasts competed at the Olympic level, Clifford said her goal for her Penfield-based c enter is for her students to earn college scholarships. “That’s a much more realistic goal,” she said, “and one without the pressure of being an Olympian.” Another of the center’s missions is “Safety first, last and always.” As a national safety and risk management instructor, Clifford travels around the country to teach injury prevention. She also quickly became a national level judge for gymnastics. “I’m not reactive, I’m proactive — in everything,” she said. When the recent sexual abuse in gymnastics was exposed — something she called a “national tragedy” — Clifford was concerned, but not about her center. “We don’t do anything unsafe because we already have safe practices in place,” she said.

Finding the remarkable

Every child at GTC learns specific skills in a specific order, but at their own pace. “It’s a never-ending sport,” Clifford said. “That’s what makes it so cool.” More than 160 different classes are offered at the center each week. Students currently range in age from one to 59 (yes, there are adult classes, too). She has a staff of 35, including 28 professional teachers. “No other sport, other than swimming, will build the self-confidence, strength, flexibility, and coordination that gymnastics does,” Clifford said. “There’s no other word for it – it’s remarkable to me.” Unlike some sports facilities, Clifford doesn’t offer eight- or 10-week sessions. Rather, when a student signs up, they “own” their spot for the full school year. Tuition is paid monthly. She requires only a two-week notice to withdraw. She

allows “observations” of classes every 10 weeks or so, and has regular parent meetings. “When you join, you’re part of the GTC family,” Clifford noted. She regularly offers on-site field trips, including a 20-year program with Cancer Action and she trains and works with about 100 kids with cancer each year. GTC works with a Special Olympics team and Clifford has been on the Special Olympics board for many years, and is also its safety advisor. She is a member of Rochester’s Press Radio Club and is also involved with the Monroe County Sports Advisory Council. Clifford is currently president of the New York State public high school gymnastics officials.

“You make time for the big things,” she said with a shrug. “It’s part of my personality … everything I do, I have to get involved. I like things to be run well.” She has won numerous accolades and awards, including being named a New York State Woman of Distinction by the New York State Senate. At age 62, there is no end in sight for Clifford. And that’s despite two screws in an ankle, six in her neck, and four in her shoulder, all from past injuries. “I keep saying what’s next? What else can we do? It’s a never-ending process,” Clifford said. “I’m always asking, ‘What more can I give from my heart to make the world — or Rochester — a better place?’ That’s the biggest motivator for me.”

Roc Parent Magazine

March/April 2018

Rochester arts organizations offer sensory-friendly performances By DAWN KELLOGG and DRESDEN ENGLE

Come on in ... and enjoy a live stage performance where your kid can fidget, ask questions, laugh out loud, not be startled by loud noises or a dark theater, and feel relaxed and welcome. That is music to many parents’ ears, as inclusive performances are being designed especially for children and young adults with sensory sensitivities, who are on the autism spectrum, or have other special needs. A number of theater and dance groups in Rochester are working to offer relaxed and accessible performances. This entails tailoring the live-show experience, by leaving the lights on in the theater, although dimmed, for those who fear the dark and also allowing families to come and go as they need. Loud noises, sudden movements, and flashing lights onstage are reduced or modified, so guests are not overwhelmed or startled. Also, quiet rooms with fidget toys are provided.

RAPA’s sensory-friendly Treasure Island is set for May 6. PROVIDED PHOTO

Some theaters, such as Nazareth Arts Center, limit seating to blocks of four to six so there is adequate space around groups. Other theaters encourage parents to choose their own seats and request space between seats or rows if desired. The Rochester City Ballet has been creating a sensory-friendly performance each winter for four years. The dance company’s Cinderella performance on March 11 was a sell-out, as the RCB team made the family outing to the ballet fully inclusive, including crafting pre-events that

Our students say it all. Appreciation of learning is what it’s all about for students at Rochester School for the Deaf.

Since 1876, our students have been discovering the art of communication and education in a nurturing, inclusive environment—at no cost to families. As a private school, our dynamic educational programs employ skilled professionals who educate students in a vibrant multicultural and bilingual scholastic setting which includes American Sign Language and English. H Building futures for deaf and hard of hearing students H Focusing on infant, early childhood, K-12 grades, up to age 21 H Sign language learning programs and community outreach services Get in touch today and give your student an appreciation for learning.

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eased children into the experience. RCB’s program, under the direction of Executive Director Nichole Gantshar, was created to welcome children on the Autism Spectrum to live performances. However, RCB has found many families with children with special needs are concerned that a child might disrupt the performance. They feel welcome at the sensory-friendly show for many reasons. “We call it the performance where no one says ‘shush,’” Gantshar said. One of the first theater companies to offer sensory-friendly performances was TYKES at the JCC, and the group has already offered such performances during the 20172018 season. RAPA Family Theatre added sensoryfriendly performances to its current season, with performances at Kodak Center on West Ridge Road. Audience members are welcome to bring their own manipulatives, seat cushions, comfort objects, and extra support items to the show. RAPA also offers a preview social-story, to increase engagement, as well as gluten-free concessions, since many children with special needs have dietary restrictions. The next sensory-friendly RAPA show will be Treasure Island on Sunday, May 6, at 4:30pm. For more information, visit rapatheatre.org. “RAPA’s sensory-friendly shows strive to create a welcoming environment for people with disabilities, and their families and friends, to participate in a high-quality creative arts experience with additional supports,” said Barb Martorana, director of the Department for Exceptional Children at Monroe 2-Orleans BOCES, which with AutismUp helped RAPA create their new program. Nazareth College Arts Center’s welcomes the Vital Theatre Company’s performance of Pinkalicious in May, with a sensoryfriendly performance at 11 a.m. Saturday, May 5 at Nazareth Arts Center. To reserve tickets visit www2.naz.edu/arts-center or call the box office at (585) 389-2170. The Shaw Festival in Niagara-on-theLake has just announced a relaxed performance of its production of The Magician’s Nephew (based on the C.S. Lewis novel) at 2 p.m. Thursday, Oct. 4. The production will have “a relaxed approach to noise, movement, sound, and light.” Learn more at shawfest.com/visit/accessibility/.

Special camps for special needs While many summer camps around the Rochester area are inclusive and welcome all abilities, here is look at four camps that focus on the special needs of kids with disabilities. Autism Up

Camp Smile

AutismUp provides a myriad of support services and activities for individuals with Autism Spectrum Disorder, and their families, in the Greater Rochester area. Innovative programs are offered in a multi-sensory learning environment custom-designed with autism in mind, such as art and music for relaxation, exploring play and sensations, cooking with friends, and fitness classes. AutismUp’s summer camp is a social skills program offered in collaboration with the Greater Rochester YMCA at the Bay View Family Branch. AutismUp programs, including summer camp, is open to children ages 4 to 16 with Autism Spectrum Disorder or related disabilities. Dates: To be announced soon. Cost: Families have an option to become a member for $25, which includes a network of autism professionals, community organizations, and volunteers. Fees for summer programs and summer camp will be announced soon. Location: Summer program are offered at AutismUp headquarters at Publishers Parkway in Webster, with a summer skills program offered at Bay View YMCA in Webster. Contact Info: contact@autismup.org; (585) 248-9011; autismup.org

Camp Smile provides an exciting camp experience for kids who are blind or visually impaired. Run and funded by the Webster Lions, the experience encourage campers to be independent — although each camper is assigned a one-on-one counselor — giving them the chance to succeed or fail with things they encounter daily. Camp Smile provides bus transportation to and from camp, as well as daily lunches to accommodate any camper’s diet. Dates: July 11-Aug. 5, 9 am-3 pm (Campers can attend for one, two, three, or all four weeks) Cost: Free Location: Kiwanis Lodge, Webster Contact info: contact@campsmile.org; (585) 203-5000; campsmile.org

Heritage Christian Services AutismUp and YMCA team up each summer to offer a social skills program at Bay View Family Branch in Webster. PROVIDED PHOTO

Heritage Christian Services supports thousands of children and adults with disabilities annually and offers a summer respite program for children and adults. Activities include swimming, fishing, nature walks, and arts and crafts, as well as hands-on farm activities. Summer programs are offered for those with developmental disabilities, ages 5 to 21. Dates: July and August dates to be announced Cost: Free Location: Springdale Farm in Ogden and Rotary Sunshine Camp in Rush Contact: info@heritagechristianservices.org; (585) 340-2000; heritagechristianservices.org

Rochester Rotary Sunshine Camp For two weeks every summer, the Rochester Rotary Club offers Sunshine Camp to children with disabilities, thanks to generous contributions from Rochester Rotarians and the community. Activities include a climbing wall, splash pad, archery, boating, fishing, mini golf, swimming, arts and crafts, digital photography, music, nature trails, and sports. Sunshine Camp is open to children ages 7 to 21 with any of the following disabilities: Asperger’s syndrome, asthma/allergies, autism, cerebral palsy, diabetes, down syndrome, dyslexia, head injury, impairments in hearing, speech or vision, heart conditions, learning disabilities, multiple sclerosis, muscular dystrophy, Obsessive Compulsive Disorder, seizure disorders, spina bifida, and terminal illness. Dates: Session 1 (ages 7-15), July 15-July 20; Session 2 (ages 16-22), July 22-July 27 Cost: Free Location: Rush Contact info: Brandi Koch, Partner Director; (585) 546-7435 ext. 210; brandi@rochesterrotary.org; sunshinecampus.org

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Roc Parent Magazine

March/April 2018

Rochester mom invents ® Vidget for those who fidget Groundbreaking chair enhances learning for all kids By DRESDEN ENGLE

“Sit still.” Like many children, Sandra Turner was told that as a child, despite struggling with attention issues. Fast forward a few decades, and she has launched a product that moves beyond the norm, beyond the stiff four-legged classroom chair with a straight back. The Vidget® actually moves, from side-to-side and front-to-back, quietly and safely, with a rocking motion that helps release energy and allows children to be in control of their own physical movement. It cannot tip backward and ultimately helps children and adults self-regulate and focus. “This is the first time a seating device is working,” said Turner, who invented the Vidget® and founded Rochester-based company Viggi Corp. with Christalyn Snyder, and with support from Rochester business Richard Kaplan. Together they have helped students nationwide, from age 2 through adult, get the sensory input they need to match their output abilities. The end result is improved focus and attention; increased time on task; and reduced frustration and feelings of confinement.

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“It’s not just about getting the movement but it’s about inspiring and encouraging the movement,” Turner said. “When I was a kid I felt like I was different because my body needed to naturally move.” The Vidget® stemmed from Turner’s

thesis research for her MFA degree while studying at Rochester Institute of Technology. She worked to find the balance between a child’s need for a spontaneous release of energy and that same child’s need for perceived control. “We needed to inspire natural movement and I believe we’ve accomplished that as a company,” Turner said, noting there are hundreds of Vidget® chairs in classrooms around the Rochester area and in classrooms across 48 states. “I wanted to design a seating device that would not stigmatize a child or any person,” she said. “The Vidget® is colorful and looks fun rather than therapeutic.” Turner tests The Vidget® at local BOCES, where she lets the teacher and student experience the chairs organically grow in the environment. The ladies at Viggi Corp. get feeback on The Vidget that when using it, children feel free to explore and feel physically and cognitively safe. Research proves that sitting for more than 10 minutes at a stretch reduces our awareness of physical and emotional sensations and increases fatigue. Playing, running, jumping, and feeling a sense of freedom is not only a desire but a human need, Turner noted.

social. sensory. fitness. recreation. readiness. She is the mother of three, adopting her three-year-old and six-year-old children during the time she founded and has grown her six-year-old company — three years spent researching and developing and then selling the products since fall 2015. “All children need to move, but some kids with ADHD, autism, and sensory processing disorder need more movement.” she said. “Another ‘aha’ moment was to add recessed handles on the sides with sensory bumps on the top surface — kids’ fidgety fingers naturally find the bumps which provide a temporary sensory input for children needing to promote calmness and focus.” Teachers who have incorporated flexible seating in their classrooms have noticed positive results. Dan, a sixth-grade special education teacher, saw changes in less than a week. “I have observed a noticeable increase in on-task behavior from students who use them,” he said. “Students who sit in the chairs participate more and demonstrate greater self-management. I am extremely excited and grateful to have these ‘tools’ as part of my classroom.” Turner wants children to embrace the idea that a chair doesn’t have to be just a chair and inspire them to use their imagination, perhaps also using the chair as a desk. And rather than telling students to sit still, teachers instead can encourage quiet fidgeting to help students learn. “With the Vidget®, we are not just moving our bodies, we are changing the way we look at the learning environment,” she said. “Creating healthy and flexible spaces that inspire collaboration, creative and critical thinking, is what builds innovative spirits and ideas. The Vidget® is just one tool that helps in the process.”

With the Vidget® we are not just moving our bodies, we are changing the way we look at the learning environment.

have FUN

FIT

make

FRIENDS

AutismUp

is the leading, local organization supporting individuals with autism, and their families, by providing opportunities to improve quality of life. Visit our website to become a member, and register for programs.

INNOVATIVE PROGRAMS for all ages & abilities MULTI-SENSORY Learning Environment CUSTOM DESIGNED with autism in mind Alpha U Art & Music for Relaxation AU Fit Basketball Skills & Drills Birthday Parties Boys Zone Caregiver Events Connections Cooking With Friends Exploring Play Exploring Sensations Family Events Family Navigation Fitness Classes Girl Power iCan Bike Camp Minecraft Open Sensory Gym Play Parent Consultation Parent Training & Workshops Personal Training SCAN at Nazareth Self Regulation Skill Building Summer Camp Teen Kinect Teen Socials Teen Techies Vision in Motion

www.autismup.org

— SANDRA TURNER, VIDGET® INVENTOR

855 Publishers Parkway | Webster, NY 14580 | 585.248.9011

Roc Parent Magazine

March/April 2018

Roc Parent introduces some These cool kids balance school, talent, passion, and compassion By TOM RAND (fellow Terrific Teen)

There is a definite admirable quality in those teenagers who go out of their way to help others as they juggle family and school responsibilities and find their way in the world. Zoe Dae Ferraro, an 18-year-old senior at Bishop Kearney High School in Irondequoit, is a model of that virtue. Zoe was crowed Pageant Queen at the 2015 Miss Puerto Rico of Rochester Cultural Pageant. The pageant is a component of the annual Puerto Rican festival, a 48-year-old cultural celebration in a city that proudly boasts the state’s second-highest Puerto Rican population. At first, the idea of a pageant turned Zoe off. “I realized, and I was taught, that it is a cultural pageant not a beauty pageant, so it doesn’t matter how you look,” Zoe said. Participants in the pageant must meet a litany of requirements, including a GPA minimum, a submitted essay and resume, volunteer service hours, personability, and knowledge of their heritage and origin in Puerto Rico. She and other contestants worked for weeks in preparation of the pageant — work that paid off with her victory. “I fell in love with the girls and it became a sisterhood,” she said. “It was more just like a hobby than it was like a competition.” She has continued her connection to her heritage by volunteering with ¡Soy Unica! ¡Soy Latina!, a local advocacy group that meant to provide Latina youth with confidence in their ethnicity through seminars and stations based on interests. Zoe has been in Catholic school her entire life, and at Bishop Kearney since middle school. The experience built for Zoe “a nice family spirit and I feel like getting involved there is easy.” As a student at Bishop Kearney, Zoe exemplifies what a busy lifestyle can mean for teenagers. She runs three seasons of track and field: cross country, indoor track, and outdoor 14

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track; participates in National Honor Society; performs in the school’s musical each spring as lead dancer; is active in the school’s campus ministry; and performs volunteer service in the community. That volunteer service earned Zoe the Do The Right Thing Award, an annual award given by the Rochester Police Department to foster a positive relationship between the police and Rochester youth. It is not the recognition, but the work, that Zoe remembers. She returned to her work with Greentopia as a favorite experience. Greentopia is a local advocacy group geared to developing sustainable green spaces in the city of Rochester. Zoe’s grandfather, Martin Pedraza,

works as a civilian advocate for city green spaces, enabling Zoe to grow up around nature and gardens. “I felt really empowered teaching them something I already knew,” she said. As a graduating senior, next up is college and Zoe has applied to Fordham, Syracuse, Cornell, University of Buffalo, and St. John Fisher. She intends to study political science and social services in college with the goal of becoming a lawyer practicing children’s law, advocating for children in custody cases, welfare cases, or juvenile justice. “I feel very connected to kids who have had hard home lives and hard backgrounds, and I feel like they cannot cognitively represent themselves appropriately in court, if say something like sexual harassment happens at home, or domestic violence, so I’d like to advocate for them,” Zoe said.

To put it simply, Baylee Morrison is doing what she loves. The 13-year-old is a student at Palmyra-Macedon Middle School who works professionally as a dancer, singer, actress, and model. “I love to perform in front of people,” she said. “It’s a God-given gift and I think I should share that with other people, too. I love the adrenaline and I like to make people happy when they listen to my music.” And perform she has … Baylee has sung the national anthem more than 200 times at sporting events, from the Amerks to the Buffalo Bills to NASCAR races. And it all started with karaoke. On vacation, her grandpa encouraged her to sing with a karaoke machine in the lobby of their hotel. At first, she was nervous about it, “but I decided on doing it, and when I got there I sang 50 songs because I loved doing it. That’s when I figured out I loved performing in front of people.” After that, it was the national anthem at Palmyra’s local dirt track and ultimately the Buffalo Bills. “It’s a one-in-a-million chance,” Baylee said. “There are so many people watching you, all eyes are on you. But I really don’t get nervous because I’ve done it so many times.” But that visit to the Bills’ stadium included a mix up with famed Bills quarterback Jim Kelly. “I went up to him and I thought it was Jim Carrey, so I was like ‘Hi, Jim Carrey!’ and my mom’s like ‘It’s Jim Kelly’ and I was like ‘Oh...hey!’” Baylee said. Also a songwriter, personal experiences have driven her lyrics and context of her song. Real-life inspiration was at the center of Baylee’s first-released single,

“Discommunication,” due to her sisters’ refusal to play with her and her friends’ inability to look up from their phones and talk to each other at lunch in school. Baylee is currently in the process of shooting a music video for “Discommunication.” Besides the achievement of having a single released, Baylee had it produced by Elvio Fernandes, the Rochester-based multi-instrumentalist member of the platinum-selling band Daughtry, and Johnny Cummings, a local member of the band “Something Else.” Baylee met Elvio through participation in Camp ROC Star, of which she is now in the ROC Star Academy, the year-

round evolution of the summer camp, and performs with the band she formed there. “It’s amazing, he’s such a good guy... it was really fun getting advice from him,” Baylee said of Elvio. Baylee is represented professionally by Mary Therese Friel, LLC, a modeling agency based in Mendon, which is f ostering a professional arrangement for Baylee with Damon Elliott, a producer who works with Beyoncé, Britney Spears, and Christina Aguilera. “I feel like he could really enhance me in this kind of business,” Baylee said. “You see Beyoncé, she’s so successful, but that’s all I really want to be is successful.”

Roc Parent Magazine

March/April 2018

Jeremiah West, 12, and his brother Joshua West, 9, are true champions of change. For their continued and tireless work of helping the homeless, they’ve been guests at the White House and also on Ellen. (And although Jeremiah is a few months’ shy of being a teenager, the West brothers are clearly Terrific Pre-Teens, so we happily include them in this feature). The West brothers fundraise and organize events for the needy in Rochester year-round, with a focus on helping the homeless. They have presented at the local TEDx conference and have written and published two books: Champions of Change: Live to Give and Champions of Change: Princess for a Day, which have sold more than 7,000 copies. Their organization, Champions of Change, was founded in 2013 with the support of their parents, Olivia and Norm, as well as their seven-yearold sister, Jordan. The counter on their website boasts 3,000 people helped since 2013, across Rocheser and in Austin, Texas; Flint, Michigan; and Los Angeles. The organization’s slogan is “Little deeds, HUGE impact.” Jeremiah and Joshua are featured on Rochester news outlets regularly for their work and have received recognition from Mayor Lovely Warren and Senator Kirsten Gillibrand. News of their good work reached Ellen Degeneres, who featured the family on her show in September 2017. “The impact they have had in Rochester has been amazing,” Degeneres said on air during the interview with the Wests. (To see video of this show, Google “Ellen Champions of Change”). “It all started when we went to New York 16

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City, and as it tells in our book, we helped a homeless man by giving him a hot dog and an orange soda, and really that one moment turned into an entire movement,” Jeremiah said. “We wanted to do even more for people in need, because we felt so good after we helped that homeless man. We wanted to have an even bigger impact and we wanted to help even more people.” Within months they had organized the first of their Homeless Christmas Parties. “Our homeless friends get to come and have hats, gloves, hoodies, hot meals,” Joshua said. “We have a D.J. that plays music and it’s just a really great time. It’s great to see that they have a smile on their face and it puts a smile on our face, too.” Champions of Change also organizes events, such as the Fight Cancer with Camren Fun Run in 2014, to benefit a sixyear-old Rochester boy with cancer.

“We raised enough money to help him with his medical bills,” Joshua said. Today Camren is cancer-free, and his mother has begun fundraising efforts for families with children with cancer inspired by the West’s work. Despite their busy lives of entrepreneurship and charity work, Jeremiah and Joshua find time for fun, playing basketball and video games. The Wests are homeschooled and also attend community classes. The Wests are expanding their organization to Charlotte, N.C., an effort begun while on an extended stay taking care of their great-grandmother with their parents. Sales from their book in Charlotte have been donated to children in homeless shelters. “We want to expand by helping even more people. We want to impact even more lives and we want to help even more homeless people,” Joshua said. “We just want to help even more people.” Learn more about the Wests and their organization at championsofchangeusa.org.

Young actors and models in the spotlight, the ones we see on television or in a magazine, seem almost unattainable, unknowable people, blessed with fortunate circumstances that earned them the rare opportunity of having their name in lights. But Tyler Aser, a 15-year-old model and actress based in Webster, defies that perception, with her immediate friendliness and eagerness to reach out to others. “It’s really an incredible business,” Tyler said about the performing arts. “I get to meet so many friends and designers from around the world.” Tyler began her career with classes at RAPA (Rochester Association of Performing Arts), an organization in the city known for classes and productions tailored toward educating young people in theater. “I love playing sad or happy roles,” she said. “I would say I’m best at playing a character with attitude or drama. It’s teenagekinda life, so it comes naturally,” Tyler said, laughing. She has been the lead in two local short films and the principal in three others, as well as an “extra” (crowd-scene or background actress) in national shows on CBS, Fox, and Comedy Central. Tyler said performing as an extra on CBS TV drama Blue Bloods was one of her favorite professional experiences. “I got to go in all the hair trailers, the

makeup trailers, got to hang out with all the stars, which was really awesome,” she said. And the bonus? “I got to give the stars doughnuts and eat donuts with them all day.” She evolved her acting interests into

modeling and has found great success, appearing on the cover of the first issue of NYFW Magazine and modeling for Love Baby J Couture. “The feeling I get in the moment, it’s almost like a warm family feeling, and you feel like you belong there, and you almost wanna do it for hours and days just nonstop,” Tyler said. “It just makes you feel incredible about yourself. It feels special.” Locally, she is represented by Two Sues Casting & Coaching and was a leading contender in the categories of Top Female Model and Best Actress for the 2018 Roc Awards. Tyler attends high school in Webster. “A lot of my friends think it’s really cool and a lot of people around school do, too,” Tyler said. “Some people are a little iffy about it, and people pick on me because of it.” She’s learned to adapt, however. “Honestly, I’ve been picked on it for years, but it’s almost like I’m at an advantage when I get picked on. I learn from it.” She draws strength in dealing with bullying from a past film project, performing in the 2015 short film about teen suicide titled “Never Too Late.” “I can relate to it,” Tyler said. “One of my friends committed suicide, and one of my other friend’s sisters has tried, and I can see the struggles people are going through. The fact I can help people, and make a film that can help people out is amazing.” Roc Parent Magazine

March/April 2018

CURATED

CALENDAR A selection of things to see and do in March and April

PERFORMANCES An American in Paris Rochester Broadway Theatre League/ Auditorium Theatre March 20 to 25; Ages 8+ An American in Paris is the new Tony Award®-winning musical about an American soldier, a mysterious French girl, and an indomitable European city, each yearning for a new

beginning in the aftermath of war. Acclaimed director/choreographer and 2015 Tony Award®-winner Christopher Wheeldon brings the magic and romance of Paris into perfect harmony with unforgettable songs from George and Ira Gershwin in the show that earned more awards than any other musical in the 2015 season! Don’t miss this stunning Broadway hit when it arrives in Rochester on its first national tour! Tickets: $38 to $83 Where: 885 East Main Street, Rochester More info: rbtl.org

Madagascar: A Musical Adventure TYKEs / JCC Hart Theatre April 7 to 15; Ages 3+ Join Alex the lion, Marty the zebra, Melman the giraffe, Gloria the hip hip hippo and, of course, those hilarious, plotting penguins as they bound onto your stage in the musical adventure of a lifetime. Madagascar follows all of your favorite crack-a-lackin’ friends as they escape from their home in New York’s Central Park Zoo and find themselves on an unexpected journey to the madcap world of King Julien’s Madagascar. Filled with outlandish characters, adventure galore and an upbeat score, Madagascar will leave audiences with no choice but to “Move It, Move It!” Tickets: $16/$15 JCC Members Where: 1200 Edgewood Avenue, Brighton More info: jccrochester.org The Addams Family Nazareth College Arts Center April 20 to 22 It’s every father’s nightmare. Wednesday Addams, the ultimate princess of darkness, has grown up and fallen in love with a sweet, smart young man from a respectable family—a man her parents have never met. And if that weren’t upsetting enough, Wednesday confides in her father and begs him not to tell her mother. Now, Gomez Addams must do something he’s never done—keep a secret from his beloved wife, Morticia—just as his entire, ancient family hosts a dinner for Wednesday’s ‘normal’ boyfriend and his parents. The Addams Family features an original story where two worlds collide, causing everything to change for two families on one fateful night. Tickets: $15/ Seniors $13/Students $7.50 Where: 4245 East Avenue, Pittsford More info: naz.edu/arts-center Oliver! RAPA at Kodak Center April 21 to 28 The Tony and Olivier Award-winning show, and one of the few musicals to win an Academy Award for Best Picture, Oliver! is widely hailed as a true theatrical masterpiece by actors and audience members alike. The streets of Victorian England come to life as a malnourished orphan, Oliver, escapes to London and finds

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CURATED CALENDAR acceptance amongst a group of petty thieves and pickpockets led by the clever Fagin. When Oliver is captured for a theft that he did not commit, the benevolent victim, Mr. Brownlow, takes him in. Fearing the safety of his hideout, Fagin employs the sinister Bill Sikes and the sympathetic Nancy to kidnap him back, threatening Oliver’s chances of discovering the true love of a family. Tickets: $19.50 to $49.50 Where: 200 West Ridge Road, Rochester More info: rapatheatre.org/main-stage-season

Best of Broadway Cobblestone Arts Center April 28 Enjoy classic hits from Broadway musicals including Les Miserables, Rent, Oklahoma and more! Fun for the whole family. Tickets: $15 Where: 1622 State Route 332, Farmington, NY 14425 More info: cobblestoneartscenter.org Treasure Island RAPA / Kodak Center for Performing Arts Studio Theatre April 28 - May 6 *Sensory friendly performance on May 6 Sixteen-year-old Jim Hawkins sets his course for adventure to find secret treasure with Doctor Livesay and Squire Trelawney. They quickly decide to outfit a ship—the Hispaniola—and travel the sea. Aboard ship, Jim meets Long John Silver, who befriends him. But Jim quickly learns who Long John really is and what his plans are. Once the ship anchors at Treasure Island, the pirates turn on Jim and his companions. Jim takes on the responsibility to save the ship and his shipmates to secure that treasure! Tickets: $10 to $20 Where: 200 West Ridge Rd., Rochester More info: rapatheatre.org/ rapa-family-theatre See CALENDAR on page 20 Roc Parent Magazine

March/April 2018

Is Your Medicine Safe at Home? Only YOU Can Secure Your Rx!

CURATED CALENDAR

Help us prevent addiction, accidental poisoning & protect the environment!

MONITOR– count your medication regularly

SECURE– lock up any medication you do not want anyone to access

DISPOSE– drop off any unwanted/unused and expired medication to your local disposal site

Medication Drop Box Locations: Bristol: Town Hall

Farmington: State Troopers

Canandaigua: FLCC (Keuka Wing) The Medicine Shoppe Ontario County DMV Office Thompson Hospital (lobby) Mental Health Clinic Police Station (lobby)

Clifton Springs: Hospital (Lobby) Geneva: North St. Pharmacy Police Station

Phelps: Community Center

Richmond: Town Hall

CALENDAR, from page 19

Rushville: Village Hall

Shortsville/Manchester: Red Jacket Pharmacy

MUSEUMS

Victor: Mead Square Pharmacy Questions, please call us at 585-396-4554.

Panorama Pediatric Group -Exceptional healthcare, education & health promotion for children adolescents and families-

220 Linden Oaks Rochester, NY 14625 www.panoramapeds.com

-We are accepting new patients AHP Provider Drs. Lisa Colton, Elizabeth Machiele, David Sulla Carla Romeis, PNP, Patricia Huselton, FNP 585-381-4830

Drs. Laura Kopp, Laura Jean Shipley Drs. RobertTuite, Margaret Callahan Danielle Stratton, PNP, Eleanor Weinstein, PNP 585-381-4836

Drs. Eric lngerowski,Jane Pardee, KimberlyVogelsang Ann Marie Kidd, PNP, Michelle Bernardi, PNP 585-381-4832

Strong National Museum of Play More info: museumofplay.org Superhero Weekend March 24 and 25 Meet official Marvel superheroes (Saturday - Spider-Man, Sunday - Captain America) at a designated time by picking up a free ticket in the Adams Atrium the day of the event. (Tickets are available one hour prior to designated superhero appearance times while supplies last.) All weekend long, receive drawing and writing tips from professional artists, create your own headband to transform into a superhero, and more. Storytime Club (Sponsored by Roc Parent magazine) Mondays at 10:30 a.m. and 11:30 a.m. Readings of classic children’s tales. Have your Storytime Club passport punched once during each visit. Collect five punches and receive a free children’s book! March Theme: Silly Stories—Enjoy books featuring tongue twisters and silly rhymes. April Theme: Things That Go—Fly, ride, and zoom through tales about transportation. Rochester Museum and Science Center More info: RMSC.org Genome: Unlocking Life’s Code Exhibit open through April 29 Do you have your mother’s dimples? Or your father’s hairline? What is it about us that makes us us? And how much of it actually sets us apart from not only other human beings but from every other living thing on Earth? Genome: Unlocking Life’s Code begins to unravel the mystery behind the complete set of instructions needed for every living thing on Earth to grow and function: the genome. See yourself in a new way: as an individual, as a member of a family, and as part of the diversity of life on Earth. 20

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SPRING CLEANING?

DON’T SWEAT Strasenburgh Planetarium: Dolphins Giant-screen film through April 28 This colorful film was nominated for the Academy Award for Best Documentary Short. From the dazzling coral reefs of the Bahamas to the wind-swept seas of Patagonia, go under the water’s surface for a romp with inquisitive Atlantic spotted dolphins, acrobatic dusky dolphins and the familiar bottlenose dolphin. Follow Dr. Kathleen Dudzinski and other marine biologists as they research the communication of wild dolphins. 45 min./For all ages Mess-tival March 31 to April 8, 11 a.m. to 3 p.m. A festival of mess! Discover the wonders of science through messy hands-on activities. Get your hands dirty while you experiment with different gooey and yucky substances. Come back throughout the week to make new creations each day. Strasenburgh Planetarium: Animals in the Sky Ongoing Star Show Take a seat in the Star Theater and find animal shapes in the clouds in the indoor sky. Then “Carl,” the friendly star projector, shows us animal constellations among the stars of the night sky, including dogs, a swan, and eagle, a lion and a whale! Finally, on an imaginary trip, we find no animals living on the moon—only on Earth. 25 min./Ages 2-5

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Make their next birthday PETACULAR!

Cumming Nature Center Snowflakes Up Close Exhibit open through April 1 In the exhibit, visitors explore the scientific art of snowflake photography and delight in the beauty of more than 30 snowflake images as they have never been seen before. For a fully immersive experience with these ice crystals, guests walk through Michael Peres’s photographic process and examine a snowflake under a microscope while answering the big question—are any two snowflakes alike? Camouflage & Habitat Ongoing Exhibition Several interactives clustered around a highly detailed mural by regional artist, Mary Mullard, depict animals, birds, reptiles, amphibians and insects in their natural camouflaged habitat. The mural demonstrates how well animals actually hide in their environment and depicts a screech owl blending into the bark of a tree, a black bear hidden in the dark recesses of pine branches, a coyote standing whose fur matches the exact shade of dried grasses and a fawn bedded down in fallen oak leaves. Inspired by artists such as Bev Doolittle who skillfully render hidden images in their detailed paintings, the mural encourages visitors to really look for these creatures while hiking on the nature trails, paying careful attention to appreciate and learn more about their habitat. See CALENDAR on page 22 Roc Parent Magazine

March/April 2018

Petacular Parties Include: • Decorated private party poom • Behind-the-scenes shelter tour • A pawesome activity • Favor bags for party guests • Goodies for the birthday guest

Book today! lollypop.org/birthday

99 Victor Road, Fairport, NY 14450 • (585) 223-1330 • info@lollypop.org

CURATED CALENDAR CALENDAR, from page 21

NYS MAPLE SUGAR EVENTS During Maple Weekend maple farms across New York State invite visitors to their “sugar houses” to experience firsthand how pure, mouth-watering maple syrup and other related products are made. Visitors also have the opportunity to enjoy fun, family-friendly activities, taste New York’s freshest syrup and purchase maple products. For a complete list of participating farms, visit: mapleweekend.nysmaple.com

Kettle Ridge Farm Where: 515 Log Cabin Road, Victor More info: (585) 683-7506; kettleridgefarm.com Maple Weekend Activities: Visit our maple/honey sugarhouse and tour our beautiful 11 acre sugarbush. Free samples. Adopt-a-Maple families, come see your tree in action! Lots of parking. Your kids will love our chicken “chunnel,” too! Products available: Maple syrup and maple cream. Pancake Breakfast Dates: March 24, 25 Keyes’ Trout Brook Sugarhouse Where: 296 Taylor Road, Honeoye Falls More info: (585) 624-5648; troutbrooksugarhouse.com Maple Weekend Activities: Sugarhouse tours/See and smell maple syrup being made. Products available: Maple syrup, maple sugar shapes, all-natural oatmeal pancake mix.

Packard Valley Farms Where: 438 Macedon Center Road, Macedon More info: (585) 329-4216 Maple Weekend Activities: Horse-drawn and tractor wagon rides. Tour of the sap house. Petting zoo. Birds eye view of the sugar bush. Craft sale. Kid’s activity zone. Maple products and baked goods for sale. Free samples of syrup and other delicious maple products. Products available: Maple syrup, maple sugar shapes, maple cream. Pancake Breakfast Dates: March 24, 25 Schoff’s Sugar Shack Where: 1064 Willis Hill Road, Victor More info: (585) 924-3769; schoffssugarshack.com Maple Weekend Activities: Family operation that produces about 200 gallons of syrup a year. We will be boiling on our wood-fired evaporator. Reverse osmosis and bottling demonstrations will be conducted when sap and syrup is available. Maple videos and hands-on demonstrations throughout the day. Products available: Maple syrup, maple sugar shapes, maple cream Shadow Hill Where: 7285 Lakeside Road, Ontario More info: (585) 265-4849; shadowhillmaplesyrup.com Maple Weekend Activities: Tour our Sugar Bush and Sugar House, see how sap is collected and made in to maple syrup, cream and candy. Hike the gravel trails through the Sugar Bush and see how a modern tubing and vacuum system works. Property is fully handicap accessible. Products available: Maple syrup, maple cream. Pancake Breakfast Dates: March 24, 25 Genesee Country Village & Museum Where: 1410 Flint Hill Road, Mumford More info: (585) 538-6822; gcv.org Maple Weekend Activities: During the Maple Sugar Festival at Genesee Country Village, 19th century interpreters showcase sap boiling, candle-making, coopering, a replica sugar shack from the 1800s and much more. Products available: Maple syrup, maple granulated sugar, maple sugar shapes, maple mustard, maple coffee, maple tea. Pancake Breakfast Dates: March 24, 25

Karen Penird, MD and Susan Miller, MD

Stoney Ridge Farms Where: 625 County Road 28, Palmyra More info: (585) 733-0814; stoneyridgefarmsny.com Maple Weekend Activities: Sugar house tours include an explanation of the sap-to-syrup process, history of making maple syrup and farm history. Kids will have the chance to drill and hammer a tap into a tree with assistance. The tour includes cooking demos with samples of different grades of maple syrup. Products available: Maple syrup, maple granulated sugar, maple sugar shapes, maple cream, maple mustard. Pancake Breakfast Dates: March 24, 25 Sweet Time Maple Where: 5680 Webster Rd., Wyoming More info: (585) 495-6803; sweettimefarms.com Maple Weekend Activities: Take tours, taste free samples, and the great smell of syrup boiling. Local honey, maple cotton candy and popcorn, candy and creams, maple crunch snack

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CURATED CALENDAR sap and discover the different processing techniques while enjoying the outdoors. Pancake Breakfast Dates: March 17, 18, 24, 25

Letchworth State Park (Humphrey Nature Center) Where: 6787 Denton Corners Road, Castile More info: (585) 493-3683 Maple Weekend Activities: Maple sugaring displays. Three techniques for boiling sap—Iroquois Stone Boiling, Iron Pot Fire Pit Boiling and modern evaporator. Maple syrup grading demonstration. Pancakes at Trailside Lodge served by the Friends of Letchworth. All day on the hour, Short Maple Tree identification walks with Parks Naturalists. Brief instruction on how to tap a tree from the technique used by the Iroquois to modern day sap collection. Products available: Maple syrup. Pancake Breakfast Dates: March 17, 18, 24, 25 mix and maple walnut topping and lots more. Products available: Maple syrup, maple granulated sugar, maple sugar shapes, maple cream, maple coated nuts. Pancake Breakfast Dates: March 17, 18, 24, 25

RMSC Cumming Nature Center Where: 6472 Gulick Rd., Naples More info: 585.374.6160; rmsc.org Maple Weekend Activities: Help celebrate 40 years of serving up steaming-hot stacks of pancakes. Take in the gorgeous landscape, enjoy a hearty, locally sourced meal, and wander the trails. On the trail, learn how a tree makes

Cartwright’s Maple Tree Inn Where: 4321 County Road 15A, Angelica More info: (585) 567-8181; cartwrightsmapletreeinn.com Maple Weekend Activities: For over 50 years this familyrun restaurant has served their famous, original all-youcan-eat buckwheat pancakes and pure maple syrup. During Maple Weekends they will be serving their pancake breakfast meals, demonstrating making maple syrup and hosting tours. Products available: Maple syrup, maple granulated sugar, maple sugar shapes, maple cream, maple coated nuts, buckwheat pancake mix.

Superheroes Weekend! Meet Spider-Man Saturday, March 24 10 a.m.–5 p.m.*

Meet Captain America Sunday, March 25 Noon–4:30 p.m.* * Pose for a picture with your favorite superhero at a designated time by picking up a free ticket in the Adams Atrium the day of the event while supplies last. One ticket per person. Space is limited.

Facebook “f ” Logo

CMYK / .ai

Facebook “f ” Logo

CMYK / .ai

museumofplay.org

Roc Parent Magazine

March/April 2018

Pal-Mac school district is a leader in exploring and embracing play in education to help young kids learn By DRESDEN ENGLE

Hey, want to play? The answer is “yes” at Palmyra-Macedon Central School District, where play is a priority for educators and young learners. “Look into every classroom and you will see children actively engaged in collaboration, you will see children communicating, you will see children playing, you will see joy,” said Brian Brooks, principal of Pal-Mac Primary School, who is often called “the play guy” by his colleagues. The vision for the Primary School, set by Brooks along with Superintendent Dr. Bob Ike and the faculty, is focused on five words: Play, Explore, Discover, Create, and Learn. Brooks explains it like this: “Through PLAY, children often EXPLORE, and as you EXPLORE, you DISCOVER. As you DISCOVER, you are often able to CREATE, and if you are able to CREATE, you LEARN.” The environment at the Primary School is one that embraces the child’s ability to explore. Area school districts have been reaching out to Pal-Mac leadership to consult on the importance of play in education. Brooks has served on panels regarding the subject, including a recent seminar at St. John Fisher College and the “Play = Learning = Play” conference at The Strong National Museum of Play. While Pal-Mac and other local school districts are embracing play, unfortunately play is disappearing from many classrooms across the country. “Even though we know play is learning for young kids, we are seeing it shoved aside to make room for academic instruction

March/April 2018

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and ‘rigor,’ ” noted a Washington Post article. “I could not have foreseen in my wildest dreams that we would have to fight for classrooms for young kids that are developmentally appropriate.” Brooks communicates regularly with the Primary School teachers about the importance of play. A recent survey of the teaching team revealed a 100 percent “yes” response to the question, “Does your classroom environment support play?” When asked, “How much time do you think children should play during the school day?”, most of the teachers replied one hour to 1.5 hours. “I am at a school where no one thinks children should have less than one hour of play a day,” Brooks said. “This reassures me of our vision and philosophy; there needs to be a balance of academics and play and we are balanced.” Pal-Mac teachers facilitate the conditions where children feel safe enough to explore, take risks, share their learning, and ask

questions. There is a focus on inquiry-based learning, whereas children develop connections to their life and to their world around them. “It is so fulfilling when you have a child share with you an experience or say, ‘Look at what I found on the nature trail’ or ‘Did you see the map we’ve created?’ or ‘Look at what I wrote,’ ” Brooks said. “When you see children excited about what they’re learning and you see that happening everyday consistently across all grade levels and all classrooms, it becomes a culture.” In Brooks’s office you will find inspirational quotes by author Dr. Seuss painted on the wall and Legos in a jar with which children can play. He is a fan of using Legos to spur imagination and creativity. “What’s really fascinating is watching a child create something totally new,” Brooks said. “They write a story in their mind, from beginning to middle to end without pencil or paper. They create characters and a plot, plus problems and solutions—and that’s language arts—but it’s happening through play.” The Pal-Mac philosophy is backed by many studies, including one conducted by the University of Rochester in 2015 titled, “Why recess is important: The role of recess

Play is a staple of a student’s day in the Pal-Mac school district. PHOTOS BY DRESDEN ENGLE

in child development.” The findings state the wide-ranging benefits of recess, including improvements in social skills, cognitive and academic achievement, physical health, and classroom behavior. “The genius of play, at its most innovative and dramatic stage, is being skipped over in favor of programmed lessons meant for older students,” said Vivian Gussin Paley, author of You Can’t Say You Can’t Play.

But, alas, not at Pal-Mac—where free play and structured play, as well as outdoor play and community walks, are a part of the regular school day for young students. “We are making play a fabric of our schools,” said Superintendent Ike, “and Pal-Mac is happy to share examples of our successes with other districts so we can learn how best to educate kids through play and the overall importance of play.”

Through PLAY, children often EXPLORE, and as you EXPLORE, you DISCOVER. As you DISCOVER, you are often able to CREATE, and if you are able to CREATE, you LEARN. — BRIAN BROOKS, PRINCIPAL OF PAL-MAC PRIMARY SCHOOL

Roc Parent Magazine

March/April 2018

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Helping our kids make sense of money Dear Dr. Amy: Our kids, ages 12 and 14, are always asking for money! They are supposed to do chores to earn their weekly allowance, but they never do. My wife and I give them everything they ask for, but they always seem to want more. Our daughter just told us that she wants Ed Sheeran for the entertainment at her Bat Mitzvah next year! They have no sense of what things cost or what it takes to earn money. I do not know what to do. Signed, My Kid’s ATM

Dear Daddy Warbucks: Let me start by saying how fortunate your children are to have such generous parents. That concludes this section on compliments. You are welcome. Unfortunately, when we give our kids everything they want without having any skin in the game – be it cash or sweat equity — we are reinforcing the notion that they are somehow entitled to these things. Beyond the fact that we are not giving kids a chance to experience the satisfaction and self-respect that comes with planning, earning, and saving, we are also

setting them up for a very rude awakening as they get older and start to navigate the often blinding light of the Real World. For example, one of my patients was shocked when she got her first-ever paycheck working in the library during college. I’ll never forget her saying, “Take-out sushi costs more than what I made this week. I’m being taken advantage of!” I just said, “Oh sweetie, I know you think you are.” I get it. Just the other day, my 14-yearold son was complaining about needing money for something he wanted that he knew I wouldn’t buy for him. I told him to

By second or third grade, kids’ math skills are to the point where they start to understand the concept of earn and spend. Include the kids in the basic day-to-day discussions about money. 28

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get a job. He reminded me that he is only 14 and, in his words, “child labor is illegal.” The spirits of my ancestors from long ago suddenly possessed me as I told him about all the ways I made money when I was his age. At some point during this dissertation, I was able to stop myself and voice some practical ideas. I suggested he get his certification and start babysitting. “Hmmm,” he replied. “Sitting on babies feels like a bit of a moral gray area.” Very funny. If he could make money by being sarcastic, he would be wealthy. In any case, from piggy bank to credit cards, there is merit in helping kids learn healthy habits around money. Teaching our kids to be fiscally responsible early on will help them cope with challenges like planning, setting limits, and resisting impulses. Here are some tips to help your child become a wiser miser.

Start early and talk often

By second or third grade, kids’ math skills are to the point where they start to understand the concept of earn and spend. Include the kids in the basic day-to-day discussions about money. Talk about what things cost and how you decide to get one thing and forgo another at times. Talk about why things cost money, such as the

cost of a well-made product that will last or spending more for something because you believe in it, such as vegetables produced using sustainable farming practices.

Discuss the difference between WANT and NEED.

Remind them that even when we need something, we have a budget for what we will spend on it — then stick to it! For families who can afford to buy the latest and greatest, ask yourselves if you really should. We often tell our children that they can be whatever they want when they grow up – make sure they know that our bank account is not included as they decide who they want to be in the world.

Model responsible behavior

Children look to their parents to get direction about behavior. Show them the Vacation Fund bank statement and discuss how the money gets there. The same goes for buying a new car or talking about the value in fixing something instead of throwing it away.

Teach your kids about making money

One of the easiest ways to do this is with

an allowance. Even a small amount can be a meaningful teaching tool. Allowance is for the work one does beyond the general expectations. Perhaps there is a chore that you would be willing to pay for? One of the things I pay my boys for is cleaning toilets. I hate cleaning toilets. For me, with three boys in the house, “Game of Thrones” is finding a toilet no one has peed on. I am happy to shell out for toilet cleaning.

It is okay to make mistakes

The feeling that they have spent their hard-earned money impulsively or on something flimsy will not be lost on them. Rarely, however, do kids feel regret when it is our money that was spent. Let’s face it, have you ever gotten handed something for free and seriously regretted even taking it when it turned out to be underwhelming? We are never going to get everything just right. It is never too late to do better. We can even learn from our kids as we go through these teaching moments. My kids have seen me salivating over a pair of Jimmy Choo’s and then heard me say that I’m going to be responsible and NOT get them. Do I grumble a bit? Of course. Being responsible isn’t always fun.

Roc Parent Magazine

March/April 2018

AGES 8 TO 12 Elizabeth and Zenobia By Jessica Miller

LOL through April — it’s National Humor Month Who says laughter is the best medicine? These books do! By DEENA VIVIANI

AGES 3 TO 7 I’m Awake!

By Maxwell Eaton III It’s morning! Well, not quite. The sun isn’t actually out yet. But this little hamster is rearing to start the day, and she wants her dad to know it. She’s already made pancakes (kind of), done her chores (sort of), and practiced her dad impressions (spot on). Why isn’t dad ready to play? The bright, comic book style illustrations have easy-to-read speech bubbles, and the detailed page spreads of the early morning shenanigans are fun to examine. The story is relatable to kids, parents, and anyone who hasn’t been ready to start their day. Fans of this book can graduate to The Flying Beaver Brothers graphic novel series by the same author for more silly stories. (Knopf, 2017, hardcover, $16.99) 30

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After her mother runs off with an opera singer, Elizabeth and her scientist father move to dreary Witheringe House, his childhood home, where she learns she had an aunt who disappeared as a child. This may not sound like the set-up for a comedy, but Elizabeth’s morbid friend Zenobia comes along who prefers fog, beetles, poisons, and ghost hunting to other things. The juxtaposition of the friends’ voices is clear, and Zenobia’s macabre sensibility, world view, and dialog make this novel a highly entertaining and often hilarious read. During the climax of the action, readers may wonder how the author will resolve the loose ends, though they will most likely be satisfied with the heartwarming conclusion. Fans of dark comedies should enjoy this one. (Amulet, 2017, hardcover, $16.99)

AGES 15 TO 18 The Gentleman’s Guide to Vice and Virtue By Mackenzie Lee

Monty’s father expects him to take his Grand Tour of Europe, then return home ready to handle the family’s estate as a gentleman of England. Except Monty has never done what his father expects of him before, so why would he start now? When his shenanigans abroad lead him, his sister, and his best friend and secret crush running for their lives, he must decide who and what he values most. Hilarious one-liners, scenarios, and sibling rivalries fill this LGBT-historical-light fantasy novel from beginning to end. The adventure and quest are second to the relationships and characters, but all come together in a fun romp. Another book would be welcome in the series. (Katherine Tegen Books, 2017, hardcover, $18.99)

PICTURE BOOKS AGES 3 TO 7 A Cat Is Better

Written by Linda Joy Singleton Illustrated by Jorge Martin (Little Bee Books, 2017, hardcover, $16.99)

AGES 4 TO 8 Crocodali By Lucy Volpin (Little Bee Books, 2017, hardcover, $16.99)

AGES 5 TO 8 Nothing Rhymes with Orange By Adam Rex (Chronicle Books, 2017, hardcover, $16.99)

AGES 6 TO 9 Seven Rules You Absolutely Must Not Break If You Want to Survive the Cafeteria

Written by John Grandits Illustrated by Michael Allen Austin (Clarion, 2017, hardcover, $16.99)

EASY READER AGES 4 TO 7

MIDDLE GRADE AGES 8 TO 12 Bean Stalker and Other Hilarious Scary Tales

AGES 15 TO 18

The Loose Ends List

What Goes Up

By Carrie Firestone (Little, Brown, 2017, paperback, $9.99)

By Katie Kennedy (Bloomsbury, 2017, hardcover, $17.99)

By Kiersten White (Scholastic, 2017, hardcover, $16.99)

AGES 8 TO 12 Ben Franklin’s in My Bathroom

Written by Candace Fleming Illustrated by Mark Fearing (Schwartz & Wade, 2017, hardcover, $13.99)

AGES 8 TO 12 Frazzled: Ordinary Mishaps and Inevitable Catastrophes By Booki Vivat (Harper, 2017, hardcover, $12.99)

YOUNG ADULT AGES 12 TO 18 The Greatest Zombie Movie Ever By Jeff Strand (Sourcebooks, 2016, paperback, $10.99)

There’s a Pest in the Garden!

AGES 15 TO 18

By Jan Thomas (Houghton Mifflin Harcourt, 2017, hardcover, $9.85)

By Don Calame (Candlewick, 2016, hardcover, $17.99)

Storytime Club Mondays, March 5, 12, 19 & 26 Silly Stories Delight in books featuring tongue twisters and quirky rhymes.

Mondays, April 9, 16, 23 & 30 Things that Go Fly, ride, and zoom through tales about transportation. Readings at 10:30 and 11:30 a.m. Collect a punch on your Storytime Club passport. Earn five punches to receive a free children’s book! Sponsored by

Dan vs. Nature

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The a King n n a e D y B

School fundraisers = asking family and strangers to buy stuff so your kid can get prizes School fundraisers help prepare children for life’s disappointments. I cringe every time a child brings home the fundraising folder. It’s homework for me. I was naive to think I would never have to do homework again once I graduated from college. I often spend long holiday weekends gluing yarn and beads on poster board. Sure, my kids put their name on the assignment, but who are we kidding? Parents do most of the work. I drive to

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the store to buy supplies. I operate the hot glue gun. I clean up the mess. I didn’t know a consequence of pushing a baby out of my womb was having to take a job as a traveling salesman. I have to hawk wares to help pay for field trips. Do you know how many people want to buy overpriced wrapping paper or cheese spreads? Unless they are selling an evening with Ryan Gosling I am not interested either. I want to throw the fundraising folder in

the trash. Unfortunately, with the catalog comes the prize pack. It’s “game over” once your child lays eyes on the prizes. My daughter’s school held a fundraiser recently. Among the prizes was a lava lamp for those nights when my 5-year-old is hosting a joint-rolling party. There was also a few toys, a tablet, and a flat screen TV. She came skipping home with an unrealistic goal. She wanted not one, but two prizes.

She was giggling with excitement as she opened the bag. It was (wait for it) a pencil. She won a pencil ... It would be a great prize if we had been writing with rocks until now. The problem is I would have to ask the following people to purchase an item: relatives, friends, co-workers, the guy I saw once in the hallway in high school who friend-requested me on Facebook, the barista at the local coffee shop, and the entire population of Maine. That wasn’t happening. So, the only thing she had a shot of winning was the “mystery prize.” It sounds exciting, doesn’t it? My daughter asked me every day for two

weeks when she would get her prize. Then, the day finally arrived. She was giggling with excitement as she opened the bag. It was (wait for it) a pencil. She won a pencil. I bought an expensive bowl and made a few immediate family members do the same for a damn pencil. It would be a great prize if we had been writing with rocks until now. My daughter was crushed. They couldn’t give her a toy ring or a small plastic toy made in China? Chuck E Cheese gives

away better prizes. If nothing else give the girl a pen. I try to teach my children to be thankful for whatever they receive. They are pretty well trained. You could give them a bag of actual garbage and they would say thank you. I couldn’t lie to her this time. “You’re right. That prize sucks!” We laughed and put it in the pencil case. It will serve as a constant reminder that you don’t always get what you want.

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ROCPA

24th Annual

Summer Activity CamP Fair

Sunday, April 8

11 am - 6 pm Eastview Mall, Victor

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Dance • Music • Educational Enrichment • Art • Gymnastics Special needs• Coding • Outdoor Activities • Drama & Theatre • and much ore!

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Inside

Should your kid go to camp?

Roc Parent looks at the many benefits of summer camp

Camp Guide Index A Magical Journey Stages Summer Theatre ..... 42 Alfred University .............................................................. 42 Allendale Columbia .......................................................... 43 Autism Up ............................................................................ 44 Bach to Rock ....................................................................... 44 Ballet Prestige ....................................................................... 2 Best Foot Forward ........................................................... 45 Bristol Hills 4H .................................................................. 45 Camp Hickory Hill ............................................................ 46 Camp Sisol/TYKES .......................................................... 46 Camp Stella Maris ........................................................... 36 Camp Whitman ................................................................. 47 Cobblestone Arts Center ............................................... 47 Corning Museum of Glass ............................................. 48 Created By Us Pottery .................................................. 48 Doodle Day Camp ............................................................ 49 Drama Kids ......................................................................... 49 Draper Center .................................................................... 50 Earthworks Institute ...................................................... 50 Eastman School of Music .............................................. 51 Falloneâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Funtime Center .............................................. 51 Forrestel Riding Camp ................................................... 69 Genesee Country Village & Museum ...................... 52 Generations .......................................................................... 52 Girl Scouts ............................................................................ 53 Greece Community Education .................................. 53 Gymnastics Training Center ....................................... 54 The Harley School ............................................................ 54 Hochstein School of Music ............................................ 55

Idols Dance Studio ........................................................... Kanack School of Musical Artistry .......................... Lollypop Farm .................................................................... Main Street Players ........................................................ Mary Therese Friel Modeling ...................................... Master Kim Taekwondo ................................................ Meadows at Mendon ...................................................... Memorial Art Gallery ..................................................... Midtown Athletic Club .................................................. Naughty Nits ....................................................................... Nazareth College ............................................................... Our Lady of Mercy .......................................................... RIT Lil Kids on Campus ................................................. RIT K-12 Academy ........................................................ Rochester Museum & Science Center .................... Rochester Yacht Club ...................................................... Roseland Water Park ..................................................... Aerial Adventure Park .................................................. Seneca Park Zoo ............................................................... Sport Aviation Camp ..................................................... Rochester Fencing Club ................................................. Tennis Club of Rochester ............................................... Twelve Corner Day Care .............................................. U of R Summer Sports Camps ................................. Vista Teach ........................................................................... Webster Theatre Guild ................................................... Writers and Books ........................................................... YMCA ......................................................................................

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What I learned at summer camp …. 7

By CHRISTINA KATZ

Feeling anxious about sending your child away to camp? Fret no more. This list of life skills will remind you of the reasons to send kids to camp in the first place. Remember, being away from the comforts of home offers your camper growth opportunities in a wide variety of competencies. Best of all, once kids are safely dropped off at camp, parents can sit back, relax and enjoy some much-needed down time, knowing the cherubs will return home transformed by their experiences. Here are 30 skills to remind parents why camp is a good idea, as well as a panacea for favorite kid activities.

Summer camp allows kids to master physical skills during camp while having fun, like these Master Kim karate students have done. PROVIDED PHOTO

Hand-eye coordination. At camp children can participate in activities that encourage process mastery like archery, karate, horseback riding, or rowing. Having to learn an ordered series helps kids focus and execute tasks.

Waterfront activities abound at Camp Stella Maris.

Healthy risk-taking. Is your child an adrenalin junkie? Do you worry that she will go too far testing the limits of what’s humanly possible? Counselors can help campers channel a zest for risks into safe outlets while honoring camp rules.

PHYSICAL SKILLS

Fitness. If your child is passionate about virtual realities, camp is the perfect motivation to get off the couch and get moving. You will be pleased when your child returns home more fit and inspired to keep moving.

Proficiency. Does your child complain of boredom? Exposure to skill-building activities can convert pouting into pride. Aptitude, discipline, and confidence come from doing new things.

Safety awareness. Do you find yourself fretting about your child’s wellbeing? At camp she can learn about first aid, water safety, and other safety protocols that go hand-and-hand with learning new things. When she gets home, she can teach you a thing or two about safety awareness. 38

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30 life skills kids can pack up and take home

Accountability. Do you wonder if you do too much for your child? At camp she needs to be prepared all by herself, whether she has to pack her own backpack for an overnight hiking trip or show up wearing activity-appropriate shoes. When it comes to accountability, daily practice is always on tap at camp.

Time management. If your child is often running late, camp is a great place to learn timeliness. Your child will swiftly master punctuality when engaged in activities she enjoys. And this proactive habit can carry over into everyday life during the rest of the year.

Open-mindedness. Kids sometimes live in homogeneous rather than diverse environments. If all the other kids are the same race, class, and social status where you live, how will your child learn to be open-minded? Camp is one place kids can experience more diversity and new friends.

Assertiveness. When kids’ lives are scheduled from morning to night year-round, they miss out on opportunities to speak up for what they think, need, and desire. Camp offers opportunities to practice healthy communication all day long because no one is smoothing the path before them.

EMOTIONAL SKILLS

11 Taking risks can be fun in controlled environments, like the Roseland Wake Park in Canandaigua. PROVIDED PHOTO

INTELLECTUAL SKILLS

Decision-making. Does your child waffle when making decisions, take polls of other people’s opinions or go along with the crowd too easily? Then camp is the perfect practice-ground to determine what he wants and needs on a regular basis. Choosing is a crucial ability for creating satisfaction in life.

Self-care. Going to camp puts kids’ self-care muscles to the test. Navigating a new environment with unfamiliar people helps kids learn to trust their intuition and honor their instincts.

Listening. Do you get weary of nagging and feel your child just doesn’t listen anymore? Kids can certainly develop listening fatigue with parents and authority figures. But after tuning in closely to some new-to-them camp leaders, they just might bring better listening abilities back home.

Playfulness. Got a perfectionist on your hands? Sometimes within

and nurture the leader inside. Every child is a boss at something. You may not think of a prolific reader as a leader, but what a terrific example she can set at camp for those who avoid books altogether.

the rush and rigors of daily life, families forget how to relax and enjoy life to the fullest. Camp is a great place to remember how to lighten up and enjoy the day.

Grit. This trendy term means the combination of courage and resolve. If your child does not bounce back quickly from disappointments, camp is a great place to learn tenacity, conflict resolution, and problem solving.

Self-appreciation. Camp is a place where kids can discover new things to like about themselves. Increased self-reliance is often the first step toward building higher self-esteem.

Diplomacy. With bullying at an all-time high, diplomacy is needed more than ever. Camp offers ample chances to find common ground, share mutual respect and practice win-win-win relating.

TYKES theater camp gives kids a stage and behind-the-scenes experience.

ENVIRONMENTAL SKILLS

Self-expression. At camp kids find fresh audiences for the countless ways to share who they are and what they think and feel. Increased self-expression leads to unfolding self-discovery.

OCCUPATIONAL SKILLS

21 Hochstein students enjoy camp with like-minded musicians.

Mentoring. Camp counselors provide excellent examples of what a constructive mentor-mentee relationship is like. Go ahead and encourage kids to become counselors in the future if they wish to experience both sides of this educational relationship.

SOCIAL SKILLS

Lasting connections. Remember pen pals? At camps, kids can make new friends and find ways to keep in touch until they meet again. This is a great way for kids to maintain long-distance friendships and build an extended social network.

Cohabitating. If you want your child to learn new things, put him in a tent with roommates and watch the lessons unfold. Sharing space and resources with others is a crash course in self-awareness and peacekeeping.

Earth stewardship. One of the best ways to teach kids about personal responsibility is to teach them about wilderness conservation. Learning about flora and fauna can spark kids’ innate respect for the natural world.

Navigation. You won’t likely be able to convince kids that they need to learn old-school map techniques while they have a GPS in their pocket. But put them in the middle of the woods with no Internet connection and they just might feel differently.

Survival. Would your child know how to build a shelter, purify water, start a fire, and find food if lost in the wilderness? Learning naturalism empowers kids to feel competent and confident in every area of life.

Sociability. Do you have a shy or introverted child? If she lacks peers who are enthusiastic about her passions, an interest-based camp can help her meet more like-minded people. Socially awkward kids feel more accepted and appreciated every time they make a new friend.

Unplugging. Virtual realities are great when balanced with the real world. If you can’t make a dent in your child’s obsession with technology, why not let the trained staff at camp try.

Emotional intelligence. If you have siblings who bicker a lot, they may benefit from being arounf kids who are not kin. Camp counselors have a way of expecting thoughtfulness and encouraging kids to practice it.

Counselors provide great examples of what a constructive mentor-mentee relationship is like.

Collaboration. Perhaps during the school year, teamwork is limited to sports and cooperation is confined to the classroom. At camp, every endeavor from cleaning a cabin to climbing a rock face becomes a new way to understand the importance of working together.

Groundedness. The first step to recovering from too much anxiety is a sense of earthiness that comes from being in touch with the natural world. Kids benefit in numerous ways from slowing down to the speed of life and keeping their feet firmly on the ground.

Negotiating. Your kids benefit from learning how to sort things out between themselves at camp. Discussing, bargaining, and coming to agreements that make sense for everyone involved is tool for creating a richer life.

Leadership. Camp provides opportunities for kids to discover

Kids benefit from touching base with nature, as these YMCA campers are doing by creating natural bird feeders. PHOTOS PROVIDED BY RESPECTIVE CAMPS

Roc Parent Magazine

March/April 2018

The YMCA hosts thousands of happy campers each summer The YMCA camps DAY CAMPS • Camp Arrowhead (Pittsford) • Camp Bay View (Penfield/Webster) • Camp Corning (Corning) • Camp Cory (Penn Yan) • Camp Eastside (Penfield) • Camp Monroe (Rochester) • Camp Northpoint (Hilton) • Camp Northwest (Greece) • Camp Southeast (Pittsford) • Camp Thunderbird (Rochester) OVERNIGHT CAMPS • Camp Cory (Penn Yan on Keuka Lake/Finger Lakes) • Camp Gorham (Eagle Bay on Dart Lake/Adirondacks)

SAILING & LAKEFRONT PROGRAMS: • Camp Bay View (Irondequoit Bay) • Camp Cory (Keuka Lake) • Camp Gorham (Dart Lake/ Adirondacks) CAMP SAMPLER: For nervous campers—or nervous parents—considering overnight camp at Camp Cory, you can enjoy the “Camp Sampler” at Bay View or Arrowhead. Attend half the week at day camp and the second half at overnight camp — arriving at Camp Cory on Wednesday and stay three nights through Saturday.

From day camp to overnight camp, the Y promises “the best summer ever” By DRESDEN ENGLE

More local children go to YMCA of Greater Rochester camps than any others in the area. Roc Parent looked into “why” the Y, and found out the reasons are many. “Camp is a very special place as it puts all kids on a level playing field, and it’s solely built for their enjoyment and their appreciation, to give them the skills and tools you simply can’t get at home,” said Mike Stevens, senior vice president of association advancement for the YMCA of Greater Rochester. “You need to be in a caring, enriching, nurturing environment, whether it’s for one week of your summer, or for two weeks, or for four weeks,” he said. “It’s an experience that you’ll look back on 10 years from now, 20 years from now, and think about the memories made at camp.” While many camps in the region focus on skill development—such as swimming, archery, and ropes courses—the YMCA day camps and overnight camps offer a more holistic approach. Y camps focus on relationships, a sense of belonging, and achievement. At the end of a week of sleep-away camp at Camp Cory in Penn Yan on Keuka Lake, the campers and counselors say aloud, “Camp wouldn’t be the same unless we were all here.” “The more unique you are, the more you shine at camp,” said Michele Rowcliffe, vice president of camping services for the YMCA of Greater Rochester. “If a child is feeling anxious and not feeling part of a group, that’s where the Y comes into play.” And why do unique kids shine at Y camps? “Because we hire staff members who were unique kids,” Rowcliffe added. These counselors are only three to 10 years older than the campers, so they can relate to and with them. “I hear from the parents all the time, ‘I don’t know what you did, because my kid had the hardest time in middle school, but 40

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when we showed up, everyone was hugging them and making them feel like a rock star,’ ” Rowcliffe shared. “If I could package that and sell that, who wouldn’t send their kids to camp?” Parents do not realize how much they talk for their kids and make decisions for them, she noted. Their world can be changed when they are away from their

adventures, outdoor adventures, rock climbing, archery, and activities on science and technology. camps.rochesterymca.org/campeastside; (585) 341-4000

CAMP MONROE 797 Monroe Ave., Rochester Monroe Y camps are smaller, more personal day camps and provide a sense of adventure. Camps include a fun-and-fit camp, sports camp, gymnastics, taekwondo, and teen cooking. camps.rochesterymca.org/campmonroe; (585) 271-5320

parents and are forced to be independent and responsible. Rowcliffe realizes this may make a parent sad, because we as moms want it to be “me, me, me,” but she even sees a “different kid” at camp with her own teen daughter, Olivia, who is a counselor at Camp Cory. At overnight camp you give up your phone and you leave the school cliques at home. No one is taking selfies and you are talking and laughing with everyone and anyone. There has been a new (or renewed) focus in recent years for letting the campers slow down, Rowcliffe noted, building time into the day for kids to chill out together, to huddle up and talk and rest and have meals together. “The demands on kids with school and athletics are getting so intense, so it’s more important than ever for them to unplug and get their exercise playing Marco Polo in the pool or hiking in the woods, vs. running 10 miles on a busy road,” Rowcliffe said. While parents know the Y camps have pools, and sports, and arts and crafts, Rowcliffe said what parents cannot see is “the special sauce, the whole experience that kids can’t articulate to their parents,” like goal-setting, or making three great friends, or finding a role model in a 20-year-old counselor. “Parents are leaving their most-prized possessions with us, for eight hours a day or for a full week or two weeks,” Rowcliffe said. “We have to do our due diligence, we have to have trained staff, and we have to provide the resources to ensure all children are safe and care for.” By comparison, a town rec center summer program may have a 1-to-20 counselorto-camper ratio, while the YMCA ratio is 1-to-6 for younger kids and 1-to 10-for older kids. This ensures safety and peace of mind, Rowcliffe noted, for parents as well as Y leadership.

Day Camps 2018 camp dates are June 25 to Aug. 24 or Aug. 31 (end date varies by camp) CAMP ARROWHEAD 20 Arrowhead Road, Pittsford At YMCA Camp Arrowhead we create a safe environment for kids to have an unforgettable summer. While our campers are taking part in unique experiences and adventures, they’re also building self-esteem, developing social skills and making lasting friendships and memories. camps.rochesterymca.org/camparrowhead; (585) 383-4590

CAMP NORTHWEST 730 Long Pond Road, Greece Activities at Camp Northwest include gymnastics, dance, and aquatics at Northwest Family YMCA. camps.rochesterymca.org/campnorthwest; (585) 227-3900

CAMP SOUTHEAST 111 E. Jefferson Road, Pittsford Camp themes include Fun and Fish, Youth Sports, Gymnastics, and Taekwondo. camps.rochesterymca.org/campsoutheast; (585) 385-4665

CAMP BAY VIEW 1209 Bay Road, Webster Camp Bay View offers a wide range of different camps, including day camps, specialty camps, preschool camps, plus waterfront activities including canoeing, kayaking, water-skiing, and wake-boarding. camps.rochesterymca.org/campbay-view; (585) 341-4001

CAMP THUNDERBIRD 1 Round House Road, Rochester Campers enjoy daily activities tailored for each age group in Genesee Valley Park. camps.rochesterymca.org/campthunderbird; (585) 263-4282

CAMP CORNING 127 Centerway, Corning Our camp is an all-day adventure, with campers bused to the scenic Watson Homestead, which boasts miles of hiking trails, a swimming facility, miniature golf course, a climbing tower, an archery range, athletic fields, and so much more. camps.rochesterymca.org/campcorning; (607) 936-4638 CAMP CORY 140 East Lake Road (Route 54), Penn Yan Camp Cory is expanding its day camp this year, with six new acres on the shores of Keuka Lake campcory.org; (800) 316-3977 CAMP EASTSIDE 1835 Fairport Nine Mile Road, Penfield Camp Eastside offers a wide range of activities, including arts and crafts, group activities, aquatic

CAMP NORTHPOINT North Greece Road, Hilton Activities at Camp Northpoint include climbing tower, canoeing, swimming, archery, nature activities, group games, and more. campnorthpoint.org; (585) 784-3800

Overnight Camps CAMP CORY 140 East Lake Road (Route 54), Penn Yan (Finger Lakes) Camp Cory provides campers with experiences like cabin life; land, aquatic, and creative activities; and building relationships with kids their age as well as counselors. They also offer options for day camps instead of overnight camps. campcory.org; (800) 316-3977 CAMP GORHAM 265 Darts Lake Road, Eagle Bay (Adirondacks) At Gorham, campers are immersed in the traditions of camp, on a private lake and hundreds of wooded acres. Activities include swimming, rock climbing, kayaking, sports, and horseback riding. campgorham.org/overnight/ traditional-camp; (888) 518-5671

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Created By Us Pottery Summer Camp A FuN & ArtSy KiNdA CaMp!

Monday – Friday, July 9th – August 17th 9am – 12noon OR 9am – 4pm

Ages 5 – 9: Enjoy Weekly Themed Camps Painting Pottery & Canvas, Crafts, Games & More! Ages 10 – 15: Learn a variety of painting techniques on Pottery, Canvas, Glass & Wood!

CALL TODAY! 585-223-8210 3 Railroad Street, Fairport NY 14450

www.createdbyuspottery.com 48

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Experience summer at

children's program

creative movement ages 3-4 pre-ballet ages 5-6 July 5-31, 2018

two week programs* July 9-20, 2018

four week senior intensive* July 30-August 24, 2018

For more information call 585.461.2100 or visit www.drapercenter.com *Audition Required

Photo Credit: Tim Wilkes

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FALLONEâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;S

Funtime Center & Recreational Hangout

OUR SUMMER PROGRAM ROCKS! School Age Program offers: * Summer clubs and Boating * Weekly themes and Field Trips * Counselor in Training programs\ * Developmentally appropriate curriculum ages 5-15 * NY State licensed center

Child Care Center offers:

* Children 6 weeks to 4 years * Developmentally appropriate curriculum * Certiď&#x192;&#x17E;ed staff * Educational coordinator, visiting nurse

124 Whittier Rd, Rochester, 14624

585-594-2552

www.Fallonesfuntime.com www.facebook.com/fallonesfuntime Roc Parent Magazine

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"Begin Here, Go Anywhere" Summer Program June 25 - August 25

7-TIME -:. WINNER I

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www.gtc-rochester.com • 585-388-8686 2051 Fairport Nine Mile Point Rd. • Penfield (Rt 250, North of Rt 441) 54

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les

s of Mendon S w o tab ead

Spring Break Horseback Riding Program April 2 - 6 Beginner - Intermediate - Advanced Full day 8am to 4pm, Half day 9am to 1:30pm $330/per rider Register at www.meadowsofmendonstables.com (Registration is on front page) Ms. Amy

Spring Family Riding Program Classes are held Thursdays and Saturdays, March - June 10 classes at - $395/per rider Register at www.meadowsofmendonstables.com (Registration is on front page) Ms. Amy

Spring Childrenâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Horseback Riding Programs Classes held Saturdays, 3/31 - 6/23 12 classes at - $600/per rider 40 minute lesson Register at www.meadowsofmendonstables.com (Registration is on front page) Ms. Amy

Spring Youth Horseback Riding Program Classes held Saturdays, 4/2 - 6/23 3 hour class, 10am to 1pm, 11am to 2pm, 12pm to 3pm 10 Classes for $500.00 40 minutes lesson

www.meadowsofmendonstables.com 58

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March/April 2018

From magical wizardry to exciting experiments, the offerings in this Summer Science Camp at Nazareth College are sure to capture the imaginations of budding young scientists from around the region.

SCIENCE CAMPS AT NAZARETH COLLEGE Magic of Harry Potter . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . July 9-13 Superhero Science (New for 2017) . . . July 16-20 Magic of Harry Potter . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .July 23-27 CSI: Mystery at Hogwarts (Ages 9-13) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . July 30-Aug. 3 The Summer Science Camps at Nazareth College are for students age 6-13 (except for CSI Camp) as of Fall, 2018. Camps will be held at the Nazareth College Campus. Camp runs from 9:00 am to 4:30 pm (Drop off beginning at 8:30 am and pick-up by 5:00pm). Lunch and snacks are included in tuition ($350) per week with a discount of $50 for families registering for multiple weeks.

Visit our website for more information on registration and scholarships. www2.naz.edu/dept/chemistry/summer-camps Camp Phone - (585) 389-2580 Email - scicamp@naz.edu 60

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Where fun, talent, and friends meet! Choose from full-day, half-day, morning, or afternoon

Recreation Camp Music Theatre Camp Dance Camps Athletic Camps

Themed Camps Including • Art Camps • STEM Camps • Cooking Camp

These are just a sampling of the great camps available!

For more information and to register

www.mercyhs.com Roc Parent Magazine

March/April 2018

Rochester Institute of Technology Summer Camps for Students in Grades 1-12 Lilâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; Kids on Campus

Robo Camp offers hands-on A full-day summer program SMASH Camp is a oneengineering activities in the designed for children entering week intensive summer field of robotics for different 1st-4th grade with hands-on, math experience for girls skill levels including beginner, theme-based activities that entering 8th grade advanced, and expert stimulate imagination.

CBET offers bioscience RIT College of Imaging exploration camps for middle Arts & Sciences provides RIT Athletics department and high school students with summer workshops for offers a variety of summer an interest in biology, life students preparing an art sports activities utilizing science, or medicine portfolio for college entry our world-class facilities

A STEAM (Science, Technology, Engineering, Art, and Math) based day camp for kids entering grades 5-12. Workshop topics include but are not limited to computer coding, digital arts and other technologies with breaks for recreational and social activities

Registration opens online March 1 www.RIT.edu/K12Academy

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EST 1980

FORRESTEL RIDING & SPORTS CAMP

W&B

Girls overnight riding camp Located in Medina, NY 1, 2 & 4 week sessions for girls ages 7-17. Tennis, Woodworking, Art, Paddling, Archery, Riï&#x192;&#x;ery, Team Sports & More!

March/April 2018

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Pediatric Dentistry Special Advertorial Section

7 ways to encourage your kids to brush twice a day (even if you didn’t) By CHRISTINA KATZ

When I was a kid, I was expected to brush my teeth in the morning before leaving the house. This habit stuck with me over the years and was challenging to improve. Today we know that brushing once a day is not enough. Even kids who brush once a day religiously can get cavities. I should know since I passed the habit of brushing once a day on to my daughter. So there was only one thing to do — encourage her to brush twice a day. Thankfully, this simple shift has made all the difference and now going to the dentist is a lot less stressful. Even if you didn’t brush twice a day when you were a kid, here are seven ways to encourage your kids to take excellent care of their teeth.

Establish a routine early on. Healthy teeth can last a lifetime and repetition helps form positive habits. So be sure to impress on young children that teeth need to be brushed twice a day, morning and night. Keep reminding them as they grow up and don’t be afraid to check up on them and make sure they are doing two thorough brushings a day. You can’t control your child’s oral inheritance, so emphasize the long-term cavity-prevention game instead. Help kids understand that they have the power to prevent cavities simply by brushing regularly.

Have fun showing them how. Show your kids that tooth brushing can be fun and empowering by brushing along with them. There might be a bit of a mess from shared early toothpaste adventures, and that’s OK. Keep disinfectant cleaning wipes handy to make tidying up after brushing quick and easy. If you need help getting in the brushing mood, check out this list of fun songs: mouthhealthy. org/en/kids-brushing-playlist.

Use electronic toothbrushes. Combining electricity and water can seem counter-intuitive at first. Our dentist recommended the Sonicare elec-

beyond the bathroom can make up a little teeth-brushing dance to help them pass the minutes quickly while reaching every tooth.

tronic toothbrush system for the whole family. Now that we are using the system, we all get fewer cavities at our bi-annual checkups. If you don’t have an electronic toothbrush timing your tooth-brushing, keep a simple two minute timer in the bathroom that older kids can use to make sure they are brushing long enough.

Supply the tastiest toothpaste. The taste of toothpaste can make or break a good brusher. And, of course, taste is extremely subjective, so choose toothpaste flavors family members like. And don’t worry if you have four different flavors —they won’t cost you any more in the long run and encourage happy brushing.

Let them wiggle. Staring at yourself in the mirror for two minutes twice a day is not exactly entertaining. So let your kids wander around a bit while they are brushing. Kids who are naturally kinesthetic may actually do a more thorough job if they don’t have to stand still and can focus on the sensation of moving the toothbrush all around their mouths as they walk around. Wiggly kids who are too young to manage brushing safely

Educate them about pitfalls of neglect. Focus on the positive initially rather than using use fear to motivate kids to brush. Down the road, leverage disappointing results into an opportunity to motivate kids to brush more often and more thoroughly. Perhaps share some of your dental disappointments with your kids and encourage them to avoid the same stress and discomfort by taking conscientious care of their teeth.

Reward good oral hygiene. Of course, there is more to good dental care than merely brushing twice a day. There is also flossing regularly and making regular visits to the dentist for check-ups, x-rays, and treatments. Some of the best rewards for good dental hygiene are the simplest ones like biting into a crisp apple or enjoying sugar-free gum once in a while. Of course the best reward of all is that toothy grin and feeling of pride that emerges each time the dentist announces, “No cavities this time.”

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Pediatric Dentistry Special Advertorial Section

Prevention & Good Habits Ensure a Healthy Smile

A well-rested body—young or old—functions a lot better on a good night’s sleep.

Sleep and Dental Health in Kids LAKE COUNTRY DENTAL

Sleep plays a huge role in overall wellness, especially in children. It makes perfect sense if you think about it. A well-rested body—young or old—functions a lot better on a good night’s sleep. But did you know that children can suffer from sleep disordered breathing issues just like adults? Sleep disordered breathing in children is often characterized as loud snoring, gasping or teeth grinding while asleep, mouth breathing, ADD/ADHD symptoms, bedwetting, and dark circles under eyes. Breathing issues in children can also affect their dental health and manifest itself as crooked, crowded teeth and improper development of the jaw. If you feel your child is experiencing sleep disordered breathing, it’s important to work with a dentist that takes a comprehensive approach to your child’s overall wellness and oral health, and has advanced training in dental sleep medicine. The most effective treatment strategy will involve the cooperation between doctors and dentists.

DR. JUDITH M. SHEA

Starting early with prevention and good habits will help build a life-long smile and relationship with Dr. Shea, a certified pediatric dentist, and her team. Our goal is to deliver the best possible dental care for children. By using the latest state-of-the-art equipment, we make sure your child has access to everything he or she needs at their dental visits. We constantly evaluate our materials and keep current with new technologies

For more information, visit www.lakecountrydds.com

Did you know that kids’ dental health can be affected by sleep? Your Child’s Comfort and Happiness is our focus!

Many kids show signs of sleep disorders, such as snoring or teeth grinding. Healthy mouth and teeth are an important part of a child’s development and overall wellness. Adding a dentist as a resouce to your health care support team who understands how a healthy mouth and body are connected can provide ongoing peace of mind for your entire family.

Kids and adults welcome!

Lake Country

315.789.3067 lakecountrydds.com

DENTAL

We Look Out for Your Dental Health

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Lisa Mulkin, DDS 404 William St., Suite 5 Geneva, NY 14456

Accepting nts New Patie

• Preventative Oral Hygiene • Restorative Treatment • Orthodontic Treatment

Infants • Kids • Teens We offer Nitrous Oxide and Digital X-rays Now also participating with Blue Choice Option plans 2669 Chili Ave Rochester, NY 14624

585-247-6230 | www.judithsheadds.com

Pediatric Dentistry Special Advertorial Section

to make sure you have the best options available. We pride ourselves in practicing ethically and honestly, always taking the time to explain our findings. Dr. Shea considers all appropriate treatment options and presents the most conservative plans whenever possible. We offer information, direction, and answers to any questions you might have so that parents can make the best decisions about their childrenâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s dental care. Thanks for trusting us with one of the most joyful gifts your child has to offer â&#x20AC;&#x201C; their smile. We love what we do. Let us know how we can help. For more information, visit www.judithsheadds.com

State-of-the-art Dental Care for Kids ROC KIDS SMILE

We provide specialized and comprehensive dental care for children from infancy through adolescence in a fun, safe, and state-of-the-art environment with a focus on prevention and education for the families. Our office, conveniently located in Brighton, is custom designed for treating children. We have digital radiography, which uses less radiation, and mobile x-ray units, which allow the provider to be with your child when x-rays are taken. Nitrous oxide, laughing gas, is available for children to ease their anxiety. Silver diamine fluoride is also an alternative, non-invasive option for arresting dental caries. A small drop of liquid is applied to the cavity to stop decay. Our friendly staff is highly trained, caring, and available to answer your questions. Roc Kids Smile has been trusted for more than 15 years to care for children in the Greater Rochester community. Our goal is to make sure your child leaves our practice with a healthy smile and a positive attitude toward dental care. We accept coverage from many different insurance companies. For more information, visit www.rockidssmile.com

Our goal is to make sure your child leaves ... with a healthy smile and a positive attitude toward dental care.

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Pediatric Dentistry Special Advertorial Section

CEREC technology allows the dentist to make and place a dental crown in-office in one visit.

Restore Your Smile in a Single Visit PINNACLE FAMILY DENTAL

The dental visit as you know it has been revolutionized by CEREC® technology. Pittsford dentist, Dr. Howard Silver at Pinnacle Family Dental, can now restore your smile with a dental crown in a single visit. CEREC technology not only speeds up the treatment timeline—a convenient benefit for busy schedules—but there are other advantages, too. CEREC technology allows the dentist to make and place a dental crown in-office in one visit. CEREC crowns are durable, long-lasting and natural-looking restorations. “Our patients appreciate the convenience that comes from not having to wait weeks for a dental crown to come from a lab and having to wear a temporary crown in the meantime. Within a one-to-two hour visit, patients can usually go home with their smile restored—no need for a second visit, no temporary crown that is at risk of falling out, and no goopy impressions,” adds Dr. Silver. For more information, visit www.pinnaclefamily.dental

Put Kids on the Path to Good Oral Health KENNETH TIRONE, DDS

Good dental health habits start at an early age. The oral health habits we stick with tend to be those established when we are young. Teaching your children proper brushing and flossing techniques, and taking good general care of their smile is important in developing a crucial life-long routine. A healthy mouth (and body) isn’t just about brushing and flossing. Eating a balanced diet and drinking plenty of water—especially in place of sugary drinks and soda—play a significant role in oral health.

make a lasting

impression Learn more about our compassionate approach and modern dental care that can help establish a lifetime of healthy smiles.

Help your child establish good, life-long dental habits by teaching proper brushing and flossing techniques, balanced nutrition and maintaining regular dental visits. Taking these little steps now will help your child grow up with healthy teeth and gums, a positive outlook on dental care and good overall health.

most insurance accepted new patients welcome

585.586.1780 drtirone.com 74

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15 Fishers Rd, Suite 115, Pittsford, NY 14534

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Pediatric Dentistry Special Advertorial Section

The practices we help your children learn today can make a lasting impression for a lifetime

One location — Two Specialists TWELVE CORNERS DENTISTRY

It’s also important to bring your children to our office for routine dental visits. This gives them the opportunity to view going to the dentist in positive terms and helps to reinforce good oral health habits. “Together, the practices we help your children learn today can make a lasting impression for a lifetime,” adds Dr. Tirone.

We specialize in dentistry for kids, and orthodontic treatment for kids and adults—all within one location for convenience. Our goal is to help your child develop a positive attitude about dental care. We provide a relaxed, supportive and FUN environment for both the child and the parents. Our pediatric services includes routine oral health exams, sedation dentistry (nitrous oxide), interceptive orthodontics, dental sealants, dental fillings, Invisalign, sports mouthguards, special needs dentistry and more! Whether you’re searching for a new pediatric dentist, orthodontics, Invisalign, including preparing for your child’s first visit to our office, or looking forward to your child’s routine checkup, our top priority is helping children achieve and maintain a healthy, beautiful smile into adulthood. See the difference individualized care can make! Dr. Abra Caroci and Dr. Michael Molisani welcome new patients and look forward to meeting you and your family.

For more information, visit www.drtirone.com

For more information, visit www.TwelveCornersDentistry.com

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Pediatric Dentistry Special Advertorial Section

Open wide … and relax … at the dentist Sink your teeth into some coping tips from the American Dental Association Everyone is afraid of something … whether it be spiders, rollercoasters, heights, the dark, maybe even the dentist. But while you can avoid heights and rollercoasters by staying close to the ground, you can’t avoid the dentist. Developing coping skills can help us all get through a dental appointment or procedure. Here are some tips from the American Dental Association — for your kids and also mom and dad — for getting through a dental visit with a smile.

Speak up

Let the office know your child is anxious. Tell the receptionist when you book the appointment, and tell the staff members when you arrive. And most importantly, tell your dentist. Let him or her know what makes your child nervous or if he had a bad experience in the past. It is especially important to let the dentist know if your child has felt dental pain before. Sometimes patients experience unnecessary pain even though they have been given a local anesthetic. Often a larger dose of anesthetic at the beginning of treatment often works better than trying to give more once the treatment starts.

Ask questions

If you are curious as to what is going to happen before and during the procedure, ask the dentist what the treatment involves.

Take a break

Agree on a signal your child can give — like raising her hand — if she needs to take a break during treatment.

Breathe

Deep breathing brings oxygen into your body, helping slow your heart rate and relax your muscles. You can practice deep breathing anywhere — on the way to the appointment, in the waiting room, or in the chair before treatment begins.

Distract yourself

Help take your mind off the dental work. Here are some options and/or your child: Bring headphones and some music to listen to Occupy your hands by squeezing a soft stress ball or playing with a fidget toy. It may sound silly, but go to your happy place. Try imagining yourself someplace else, to escape your surroundings. Ask your dentist about other options that might help. These are just a few coping techniques. It’s best to work with your dental team to develop a plan that not only gets you and your child in the door, but keeps you both coming back fear-free on a regular basis.

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MARCH/APRIL 2018

Say ‘ahhhhh’ at the spa A colorful palette of sip & paint places Local author fulfills her writing fantasy with Disney book deal

Dr. Meami Craig is loving life — and herself

WRITERS IN THIS ISSUE BREANNA BANFORD is the Yelp Rochester community director. She brings the online community offline, connecting people to great local businesses through collaborative events and marketing partnerships. As a Rochester native, Breanna lives, breathes, and eats for this city. When she’s not hosting events for the Yelp community, you’ll almost always find her with rosé in one hand and french fries in the other. SALLY PARKER is a writer and editor who has worked in journalism and marketing for 25 years, including 14 years with Rochester Business Journal. She said she is “still blown away that people share their stories with me and I get to tell them. These stories are everywhere, and many of them seem to pique my curiosity … Stories celebrate the human spirit and the drive to create and to make a mark. These stories will always be with us.” Learn more at sally-parker.com. LINDA QUINLAN had a more than 30-year career in community journalism. She likes to say she is “semi”-retired today. She is a freelance writer, enjoys volunteering in the community, and is excitedly expecting her first grandson this spring. She has been married for nearly 39 years, has three children, a beloved granddaughter, and a cat named Bella, who never hesitates to show her much larger dog Murphee just who is in charge. Quinlan likes to read, garden, and collect salt and pepper shakers.

VONJULA THOMPSON holds a bachelor’s degree in communications from SUNY Brockport and recently completed an internship with Roc Parent/She Rocs magazine.

FEATURES

3 4 6 7 8 12

Photography opens doors Arleen Thaler’s mission Sip and paint places A palette of options Help from Yelp Say “ahhhh” at the spa Q&A with Leslie Youngblood Magic of local author’s writing catches eyes at Disney

Writers & Books essay “Poor Girls’ Palace” by Leslie Youngblood Community Spotlight Women’s Foundation of Genesee Valley

MARCH/APRIL 2018

Dr. Meami Craig is loving life — and herself INSIDE

• Say “ahhhh” at the spa • A colorful palette of sip & paint places • Local author fulfills writing fantasy with Disney book deal

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“Love Like Sky” caught the attention of a Disney-Hyperion senior editor who uses words like “sparking humor” and “heartfelt honesty” to describe Leslie Youngblood’s writing and her characters.

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LESLIE C. YOUNGBLOOD received an MFA from the University of North Carolina at Greensboro. She has been awarded a host of writing honors including Yaddo’s Elizabeth Ames Residency; the Lorian Hemingway Short Story Prize; a Hurston Wright Fellowship; and the Room of Her Own Foundation’s 2009 Orlando Short Story Prize. Her first middle-grade novel, Love Like Sky, will be published by Disney Hyperion in November 2018. Born in Bogalusa, Louisiana, and raised in Rochester, she is fortunate to have a family of natural storytellers and a circle of supportive family and friends.

CONTENTS

ON THE COVER

Dr. Meami Craig is a trusted and popular Rochester brand. You’ve seen her byline in newspapers and magazines and you’ve heard her sharing lifestyles advice on the radio. For our cover story, she invites us into her lakeside home and shares her positive views on life. PHOTO BY NANCY CARR

Opening doors through

photography

BY SALLY PARKER A toddler in a tutu, caught on film walking toward a window in a dark and dusty room, tells the story. The child’s mother works nights, a sex worker. She has three kids. The family has no bed and sleeps on the floor. Arleen Thaler takes a photo of the child’s silhouette and posts it to her Instagram account. Offers to help come pouring in—food, clothes, toys, furniture and other life-affirming resources. “People in Rochester are abundant. They want to give,” she says. “To have that photo with a few words to captivate people to give, that’s my thing.” This is Thaler’s mission: to be a conduit for the stories of people whose voices are rarely heard. With their permission, Thaler uses photography to open doors for communities largely hidden from society. Her hope is that more exposure will bring change. “I can say this is my ministry,” she says. “My ultimate goal is to capture the attention of the stake holders, agencies and community members that can offer help and work toward solutions. I am never on a mission to save the world. Some people want to remain where they are at, so if it is just some food, clothes and toiletries, that is a gift in itself.” That she steps into hidden worlds is no surprise to those who know her. Thaler grew up in a house full of foster kids. After her parents split up when she was 6, Thaler was raised on Braddock Bay in North Greece by her aunt, Peggy Merkel. Over the years, Merkel has provided foster care to more than 450 children from across the county. There was always room for one more. Now 81, Merkel is still at it; Thaler and her husband, Daryl Thaler, and her youngest son, Ethan Oliver, live in the family home, too. Her foster siblings, now grown with families of their own, come by to visit or share the holidays. “They are my brothers and sisters,” she says. “I grew up surrounded by these kids.”

Through her photography, Arleen Thaler, pictured at right, strives to tell stories of people whose voices are rarely heard. PROVIDED PHOTO

Because of her siblings’ different backgrounds, Thaler can’t understand why people build barriers against folks different from themselves. Life’s challenges cross boundaries imposed by race, ethnicity, geography, culture and financial means, she says; all of it falls away when real connection happens. “This is a story that’s always been unfolding in front of me,” Thaler says. Thaler has been a teacher and photo artist in residence at Flower City Arts Center, and she is an addiction counselor at Huther-Doyle. In conversation, she is down-to-earth. She listens closely and quietly. When she speaks about the people she’s come to know through her work, the words come tumbling out. “I meet someone right where they’re at, so much so that I’m almost walking right in their shoes with them,” she says. “I can hang around with all the homeless people I want, but until I immerse myself right into their world—sleep beside them, break bread with them—until then I consider it a drive-by shooting. … Behind that scene, there’s this whole story.” Often her work is heartbreaking. The mother of three sons, Thaler has a soft spot for young men caught up in gang violence,

and she counts them as friends. To help illustrate the complexity of their lives, she has photographed them in moments with their children, and she is working on a project that would allow them to tell their own stories through videography. Her photos are rich in juxtaposition. Taken after many months of becoming acquainted, they strip away stereotypes to reveal stark realities. A photo of the feet of women huddled in an abandoned garage shed light on sex workers, a virtually invisible population caught in a cycle of abuse, drug addiction and poverty. The image caught the attention of a homeless advocate who within a day was on the streets assessing their needs. Thaler is driven by her own experience. Domestic violence, poverty and the death of her infant daughter brought her a soft understanding of people in need. “Now I know what’s going through a battered woman’s mind. Now I know what it’s like to have a baby born dead, to have a family member suffering from being addicted,” she says. “So I pay it forward to others who are in need.” “I want everything I do to represent the people. I can capture the photo, but it’s not me.” She Rocs Magazine

March/April 2018

Sip, paint, and unleash your talent BY LINDA QUINLAN

Looking for something different to do, by yourself or with a group? Wouldn’t mind a glass of wine, but not into the bar scene? One of the more intriguing options out there is to “sip and paint” — meaning just what the name implies: Sip some wine (most often bringing your own) while you paint a piece of art you can take home. Not artistic? No problem. “Everyone has the urge to be creative; to let your inner-artist out,” said Melissa Salatino of Vino & Vernici Paint Parties. “Plus, going to a ‘sip and paint’ event is a less threatening, more fun environment to try something new.” Janice Meyer has tried several events. “If you don’t think you have [artistic] talent, the teacher will help you find it … and you’ll have fun in the process,” Meyer said. Her favorite is Splash Mob painting parties with Gloria Kreitzberg. “She actually teaches us things — techniques, tips, tricks,” Meyer said. Today, she not only hangs her paintings in her home, but has given them away to family and friends and has even sold a couple. Kreitzberg has been operating her business for two years while also holding down a full-time job in graphic arts and marketing. “A potential client had a retail store and asked me to do a group painting class there,” she recalled. The business blossomed from there. She combines the painting with music, dance, and sometimes even sing-alongs. It’s not fine art “I try to make people come out of their shells,” Kreitzberg said, adding that school … We’re a place the “surprise,” for her is that her to come, unwind, relax, own life has become so enriched by the new friends she has made. and enjoy the company. People bring wine to her classes, as well as food, and everyone shares. — AMBER DORITY, “It’s not fine art school,” said Amber PAINTING WITH A TWIST Dority, manager of one of four Painting with a Twist franchises in the area. “We’re a place to come, unwind, relax, and enjoy

March/April 2018

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Hosting a private party featuring Splash Mob’s painting classes is just one of the options for people looking for an artistic outlet — with an adult twist. PROVIDED PHOTO

the company. All ages are welcome.” Jami Cimino has owned and operated Created By Us Pottery in Fairport for almost 10 years. While “pottery” is in the name and you can certainly paint on pottery at her studio, she also offers opportunities to paint on canvas, glass and wood. An artist for going on 35 years, Lesley Shakespeare-Brogan has been offering “paint and sip” classes for about four years. “If you can take simple direction and hold a paint brush in your hand, you’re good to go,” she said with a laugh. “It’s something to do, other than going out for drinks. And, you get to go home with a finished product.” “It gets you out of the house, no kids, for [up to] three hours,” Rogina Davis said, “and you can go by yourself or with a group.” What’s not to love? To get you started, here’s a sampling (in no particular order) of the offerings out there locally. There are literally dozens of others, too, so don’t be afraid – go paint!

OTHER OPTIONS Color Me Mine

Painting on ceramics 3349 Monroe Ave. (585) 383-8420 980 Ridge Road, Webster (585) 872-5720 colormemine.com

Paint Class Wine Glass

522 McCall Road, Rochester (585) 340-7473 Paintclasswineglass.com

Roc Paint Sip

Mobile, around Rochester (585) 764-1062 rocpaintsip.com

Wine and Design

4165 Buffalo Road (585) 594-8007 wineanddesign.com

Vino and Vernici

Locations: Various, including Casa Larga, Perinton; A Gust of Sun Winery, Spencerport; Three Brothers, Geneva; and the New York Wine and Culinary Center in Canandaigua. Meaning of the name: Translated from Italian, it means “wine and paint” Owner/Operator: Melissa Salatino Website: vinoandvernici.com Phone: (585) 259-7189 Highlights: Salatino also does private parties. She will be at Casa Larga every Thursday in March and April Specialty: She is known for teaching painting on wine glasses, but also teaches painting on canvas and “switches it up” with painted wine bottles or pint glasses as well Time: Allow 1.5 to 2 hours for a class Cost: $25, minimum of eight people Designs: If taking a class, the teacher chooses; if hosting a private party, the host chooses Key quote: “A glass of wine helps the creative juices flow,” Salatino said. “It loosens people up a bit.” Since she wants people to be happy with their finished project, she will help them get “back on track” or touch a piece up, if necessary, she said.

Splash Mob Painting Parties Locations: Various, including some area restaurants; community and recreation centers, private clubs, colleges, and even a garden center. She also does team-building events; private parties in people’s homes; and parties for older children Owner/Operator: Gloria Kreitzberg

Website: splashmobpaintingparties.com Phone: (585) 310-2584 Specialty: She only teaches painting on canvas. Time: Allow 3 hours for a class, though she can do a shorter class if desired. Cost: $40 for a three-hour class. Designs: If taking a class, the teacher chooses; if hosting a private party, the host chooses Key quote: “I wanted to be different; not like anyone else,” Kreitzberg said, explaining that her focus is on quality and teaching professional painting techniques. “I actually teach students about art — not just painting.” Her emphasis is on fun, so she combines dance, music, wine and food.

Painting With A Twist

Locations: Part of a large franchise operation, there are four area studios in Fairport, Brighton-Henrietta, Greece, and Webster. Manager: Amber Dority runs the Fairport and Win-Jeff Plaza locations, owned by her parents Website: Go to paintingwithatwist.com, type in your zip code, and a list of local studios will come up Phone: (585) 321-5577 (Fairport studio) Specialty: Painting on canvas or wood cutouts Time: There are both two- and three-hour classes Cost: $35 for a two-hour class; $45 for the (more advanced) three-hour class. Designs: A calendar, with a picture of the design for each class, is posted

online the first of every month. You can reserve a seat for an individual or group. Private parties are offered for groups of 10 or more.

Created By Us Pottery

Location: 3 Railroad Street, Fairport Owner: Jami Cimino Website: createdbyuspottery.com Phone: (585) 223-8210 Regular hours: Noon to 8 p.m. (or 6:45 p.m., if there are no painters), Tuesday through Friday; 10 a.m. to 6 p.m. Saturday; Noon to 5 p.m. Sunday Specialty: Painting on pottery, canvas, glass, or wood door hangers Time: Walk-ins are welcome, unless there is a scheduled class Group reservations: Groups can reserve for a specific time and date; if all participants are over the age of 21, wine and beer may be brought in. Food is welcome. Groups have included team-building exercises, holiday and birthday parties, showers, etc. Cost: Varies, depending on project; there is also a $40 a year membership option available. Specialty: If you’re painting on pottery – there are a wide variety of options — you have to leave your piece for clear glaze and firing, then may pick it up in a week; you can generally take other projects home the same day. Key quote: “We have enough tools to help you; it’s fun for all ages,” Cimino said. She also goes out and teaches, particularly at Lifespan facilities and day care centers, and specializes in working with special needs students.

Hope In Art Studio

Location: Studio and gallery at 144 Mill St., Canandaigua Owner: Lesley Shakespeare-Brogan Website: hopeinartstudio.com Phone: (585) 727-4574 Specialty: Painting on canvas, but also offers ongoing, six-week classes in acrylics or colored pencil Time: Allow about 2.5 hours for a class. Cost: $25 for a one-time class. Reservations: Any group can reserve for a specific time and date, but she also has regular “date and paint nights” and “mother-daughter” classes. She will also go out to teach a class for a corporate event, “girls’ night,” or children’s party. She will be hosting an animal art exhibit for the month of April. Key quote: “I’m walking around constantly, offering little tips and individual attention,” ShakespeareBrogan said. She also does demos, recognizing that some students need visuals. She formerly taught at Monroe Community College. She Rocs Magazine

March/April 2018

Treat yourself, Rochester! MAKE ANY DAY A “SPA DAY” In need of a Zen day or just some “me” time? Go ahead and treat yourself to that perfect massage, mani, or pedi — as these go-tos will literally hit the spot. Take some time out of your busy schedule to kick back and relax. She Rocs magazine thanks Breanna Banford, Yelp Rochester’s community director, for curating this list of spas.

Happy Feet Spa

TT Nail Spa

626 Park Ave, Rochester (585) 730-8612 | happyfeetspa626.com

1697 Monroe Ave., Brighton (585) 271-3333

“The first part of the foot massage begins with a shoulder massage while your feet are soaking in a tub of hot water. While you relax in a very comfy lounge, covered in a blanket they work on your feet, calves, and thighs.”

“Amazing service ... Love the attention to detail when shaping the nails and cleaning the cuticles.”

— Natalie M.

3340 Monroe Ave., Pittsford (585) 264-9940 | scottmillerstyle.com

The Spa at The Del Monte 48 N. Main St., Pittsford (585) 419-3000 | delmontespa.com “I went for an aromatherapy massage and a body scrub … both the massage and scrub were the best I have had anywhere. The entire day was so rejuvenating and relaxing.” — Alison N.

Therapeutic Massage & Bodyworks

— Kristie D.

Scott Miller The Spa at the Del Monte. PHOTO POSTED TO YELP BY JENNA B.

La Salon Bianca 3259 S. Winton Road, Brighton (585) 272-0707 | lasalonbianca.com “I see Nick for my blowouts and he’s part of my glam squad ... The staff is pleasant and the prices are quite reasonable.” — Jen R.

Bodymind Float Center

20 Regency Oaks Blvd., Gates (585) 426-6130 massage-bodyworks.com

622-1 Park Ave., Rochester (585) 413-0616 bodymindfloatcenter.com

“Therapeutic Massage and Bodyworks has people that are trained to use lots of techniques to make the session fulfill your needs (hot rock, deep tissue, thai, body wraps, lots of skincare options, etc.). I like that they keep it up-to-date and cutting edge.”

“This is a deeply relaxing experience beyond what words can describe. You find yourself in this existence between being conscious, not asleep, but not awake. Time flies. It takes a bit of getting used to and perfecting the art of floating.”

— Nicole M.

—Janelle S.

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“I came to Scott Miller for a blowout and makeup lesson. At every turn, the attention to detail and the friendly professionalism of the consultants at Scott Miller were A+ top notch.” — Amanda C.

Skintopia 2354 Monroe Ave., Brighton (585) 775-7546 | skintopia.me “The newly-introduced foot soak incorporates the experience of the zero gravity [chair] and takes it to a whole new level. In a softly lit room, gorgeous tranquil music plays, while you sit in the heated, vibrating chair. Then, a foot scrub, followed by tingling mask.” — Brenda K.

help from

Leslie C. Youngblood is at her happiest when she’s writing Her realistic fiction has earned her two book deals with Disney-Hyperion get along, but we know that’s not realistic fiction. So I really had to go back in and say, “Leslie, you know it’s messy.” I had to bring that into the story.

BY VONJULA THOMPSON

Leslie C. Youngblood has moved mountains to reach a greatness that is seemingly destined. She has worn many hats as a daughter, sister, educator, and novelist — and the latter is currently elevating her name and career, as she is a newly signed novelist with Disney-Hyperion. Her story Love Like Sky caught the attention of Disney-Hyperion senior editor Laura Schreiber, who offered her a twobook deal and uses words like “sparking humor” and “heartfelt honesty” to describe Youngblood’s writing and her characters. The young adult/ middle-grades book Love Like Sky will be released this fall. With Disney-Hyperion’s support, Youngblood is expanding her short story about a blended family and infinite family love. “When I first started reading Love Like Sky on a January morning, I knew almost instantly these were characters that would become as dear to me as my own family,” said Disney’s Schreiber. “Leslie’s ability to convey the joy, melancholy, and messiness of family and love moved me deeply.”

What is your novel Love like Sky about? Love Like Sky is about blended families. The parents remarry and have two little girls who are trying to make sense of it all. How did you come up with the title? Love Like Sky is about how you love people. It’s how you ultimately love someone. You love them like sky and what is the end to sky? It’s never ending. When you love someone like sky, that is an infinite love. The protagonist tries to explain the fact that the little one is scared, that the daddy doesn’t love them anymore. When you’re in a blended family and a parent remarries, things change. The kids wonder, “Do they love us, do they love them more?” Parents may be trying so hard to win the affection of the stepchildren that they may put their biological kids on the backburner. So

PROVIDED PHOTO

that’s what it means, that infinite love that parents have for their kids and the love siblings have for each other. I was writing Love Like Sky while grieving a brother that was murdered. So, not knowing how to deal with grief, I just needed to write about love, about an endless love and that’s what came. That’s what “Love like Sky” means to me — how I love my brother, how I love all my siblings. It’s just a way to not only honor his memory, but really for all the kids out there that are struggling, that yearn for that type of love. I hope this novel touches them.

Do you have advice for blended families? I’m a product of a blended family. My parents have been married almost 31 years. A blended family is all I really know. Even though the book is of importance, it’s not autobiographical. What I would advise is just what they do in Love Like Sky — be honest with the children and do the best you can to keeping them grounded. Try to do as they do in the novel; they really make an attempt to get along. When I initially started Love like Sky, I realized it could not be too cotton candy and butterflies. I just wanted to write a good positive story. I wanted everyone to

Why do you think Disney was interested? The big thing about Love Like Sky being picked up by Disney is that it doesn’t have any magical realism. It’s strictly what I call realistic fiction. No witches or warlocks. The important thing that this family has is their own magic. They continually support each other and try to cheer each other up. I had two publishing houses bid for the book. Laura (Schreiber’s) vision was closely tied to my own and Laura’s excitement for the book exuded from her. Who cannot go with that? Why did you choose Rochester to relocate? I was raised here since I was five. I went to West Irondequoit High School. My mom and dad lived in the 19th Ward forever. So it was about coming back to Rochester.

Were you following your dreams? I was following my dreams and coming back to Rochester rooted me. The sense of family was here and high school friends were here, but my brother’s spirit is here. I really thought I couldn’t live here. He was murdered and buried here. The memories I thought would be too painful, but I feel his spirit here and it’s encouraging as opposed to being sad. I wish he was here, but who would of thought that coming back home would be a grounding experience? I just know right now for at least the next several years I see myself in Rochester. You have to follow your passion; you have to follow your dreams wherever it takes you. I’m so thankful that my family supports me here in Rochester.

So what’s is next for you after the novels? Wow, that’s the easiest question for me to answer. After this, all I’m going to worry about is writing more. I don’t do it for the money. It’s wonderful that Love like Sky has this deal, but I truly love what I do. It’s an old cliché, but if you love what you do, then you’ll never work a day in your life. I honestly feel that way. I am my happiest when I’m at my computer typing. That itself is a blessing. She Rocs Magazine

March/April 2018

Poor Girls’ Palace BY LESLIE C. YOUNGBLOOD

(Novel Excerpt. Chapter 3) Clarissa, the youngest, rode shotgun. Ronetta drove, and Debra, slumped in the backseat of the Dodge Colt, was as quiet as a stowaway. “Air conditioner’s out. This’ll have to do for now.” Ronetta cranked up the Isley Brothers’ “Summer Breeze” before merging onto I-85 South and into the scorching July heat of Atlanta. “You figure out what you’re gonna say?” Debra asked, absently touching the scar that sloped from behind her earlobe down to her collarbone. “Not really. Just want her to call Renee,” Clarissa said. “She’s only six. She misses her real bad. And this is the longest Mama’s ever been gone.” “How long’s it been?” Ronetta asked. “Bout four months now.” Debra squeezed Clarissa’s shoulder. They’d only been housemates for a couple of weeks. Debra tried to keep her distance but knew a 15-year-old, too-grown-looking girl wouldn’t fair well on her own coming from Greensboro to a city like Atlanta. When she’d heard what Clarissa was setting to do, she’d gotten Ronetta to drive them. Debra bit her lip when it dawned on her — there she was, helping someone’s daughter when she wasn’t allowed to spend time alone with her own. “You said your mama’s boyfriend gave you this address?” Ronetta asked, between patting her short Afro into place and keeping an eye on the road. Above them an airplane flew low. The control towers pointed to the sky. “One of her boyfriends.” Clarissa’s words fluttered in the air and trailed them all the way to Hapeville, Georgia. Fifteen minutes later, they exited the highway. “It’s Elmgrove, right?” Ronetta asked, making a sharp left. “Yeah, 520,” Clarissa said, holding a 8

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ripped envelope, her unpolished nails bitten to the quick. Ronetta slowed the car, checking for the address. Children played along the sidewalk and dogs barked underneath their laughter. She inched along. “This is it,” Ronetta said pulling in front. The house was one story with broken blinds and toddler-height weeds in the yard. When no one moved, Debra said, “I can go up and ask if she’s here.” “She is,” Clarissa said. “How do you know?” Debra asked. “Mama got a loan from Aunt Ida to ‘get on her feet,’ and came back with that.” Clarissa pointed to the lime-green Buick Regal parked in the driveway. “Hard to mistake that color. But they built more than one,” Debra said. “I can see her rabbit’s foot,” Clarissa added. “I bought it for her. Guess it’s not really lucky after all.” Clarissa’s heavily glossed lips trembled. “Plates missing, but that rabbit’s foot confirms it’s her car, huh?” Clarissa nodded. “That’s lucky,” Debra said. Turning off the engine, Ronetta said, “Let’s check it out.” Clarissa led the way. Debra and Ronetta stayed two steps behind like backup singers. Clarissa’s thick bangs nearly covered her eyes. A red, gumball-size ponytail holder fastened the rest of her hair on top of her head. Debra reached out and grabbed Clarissa’s wrist. They all stopped. “You sure you’re up for this?” Debra asked, meeting Clarissa’s eyes. “Once we knock, that’s it. Sometimes people just not ready to be found.” Debra remembered how she used to go missing for weeks at a time, losing herself, losing custody of her baby girl, Ashley, who was 10 now and living with Debra’s ex-husband and his new wife. Honing in on her mid-thirties, Debra was no longer that rail-thin, strung out

girl. But the ghost of her was only a thought away. Debra lowered her gaze. “It’s not fair to my little sister. If my mama was mad at me, she shoulda just put me out.” “Mad at you?” Ronetta said. “Bout what?” “What’s it matter?” Debra snapped. Once on the porch, the theme to Ironside belted out. Clarissa knocked twice and rang the doorbell. The TV went mute. A few seconds later the blinds to the front windows moved. “Who is it,” a lady asked. “My name’s Clarissa. I’m looking for Alberta Rice.”The door cracked open. “Well join the club. I thought you was her for a second. Gotta be related.” “Yes, ma’am. I’m her oldest daughter,” Clarissa said. “Kids? News to me,” the lady said and whipped beaded braids off her shoulder. The crystal beads glistened against her honey-colored skin. Clarissa peeked inside. “You sure she’s not here? That’s her car outside.” “Correction, sweetie pie, that’s my car. And it’s a piece of crap. She was here for a few weeks until some chump wired her a little cash. Sold me that clunker to get the rest. That was about a month ago. Ain’t seen her since.” “Where’d she go?” Clarissa asked. “If I knew that, I’d have already gotten my money back for that hunk of junk?” Clarissa eyed the car. “What she need the money for?” The lady chuckled. “Sweetie, we don’t ask those kinds of questions ’round here. But I’ve heard she’s still in Atlanta, maybe the West End.” “That’s our stomping ground, Clarissa,” Debra said. The bass of a man’s voice rose in the background. “Whatever they selling, we ain’t buying?” “I gotta go.” She started to close the door. “Just a sec!” Debra shouted. Ronetta, pressed her palm against the

door forcing it open. “What now?”The lady huffed. We didn’t get your name,” Debra said. “That’s ‘cause I didn’t give it.” “Well?” Ronetta said. The lady sighed. “It’s Sugar.” Debra rolled her eyes. “If you hear anything, Sugar, or she comes back, call us,” Debra said. Ronetta handed Sugar a card with Pink Fox Beauty Salon on the front. Sugar reached for it. “It’s a long shot she’ll show her face round here.” “She might,” Clarissa said softly. Sugar eyeballed Clarissa. “Let’s just say she didn’t leave. Let’s say, I kicked her out. Your mama likes to help herself to what ain’t hers. But you her daughter, you probably know all about that.” Then the door slammed. Clarissa, her eyes welling, faced Debra. “I’m ... I’m not like that. Mama thinks so, but I’m not.” “I know,” Debra said. Clarissa didn’t move until Debra put her hand on her back and eased her off the porch. “Don’t mind her,” Debra whispered. “She’s just mad about the car is all.”

She Rocs magazine is collaborating with Writers & Books to share a short story or essay in every issue, written by students or instructors. Writers & Books is a nonprofit literary center based in Rochester that fosters and promotes reading and writing as lifelong activities. The programs are numerous and varied, reaching more than 25,000 people per year. Learn more at wab.org

“At least you know she’s alive and kicking,” Ronetta said. Debra searched for words to console Clarissa. “Here’s something to think about,” Debra said as they headed to the car. “You wash hair at Pink’s, which is smack dab in the West End. Show your mama’s picture to the customers. Sooner or later, someone’s gonna recognize her.” “You best believe that,” Ronetta said, cranking up the car.

“Wait!” Debra yelled. “What’s going on?” Ronetta asked as Debra hopped out and hurried to the Regal. The air was thick with dust and heat. She tried the doors and found the passenger’s side unlocked. She opened it and snatched the rabbit’s foot off the rearview mirror, squeezing it until the tiny claws dug into her palm Debra hoped it would bring Clarissa the luck that she had stopped believing in years ago. “Let’s go, Ronetta,” Debra said rushing in, the Isley Brothers’ harmony underscoring her words. Before Ronetta rounded the corner, Debra glanced back at the house and saw someone on the porch, watching them drive away. Set amid the colorful backdrop of the mid-to-late 1970s, Poor Girls’ Palace is a novel in progress, spotlighting the lives of four women living in a rooming house that was coined the “Poor Girls’Palace.” The short story was originally published in the Indiana Review in Jan. 2009. The first novel draft of Poor Girls’ Palace appeared on KweliJournal.com in 2013. She Rocs Magazine

March/April 2018

PHOTOS BY NANCY CARR

Meet Dr. Meami Craig ... and see how learning to love herself has changed her life By SHE ROCS STAFF

Dr. Meami Craig is a popular columnist for She Rocs and has been a known brand around Rochester for more than 30 years, as a newspaper columnist, PR professional, and radio personality. She began writing for the Democrat and Chronicle and Messenger Post newspapers while working as assistant director for public relations for the University of Rochester Medical Center. Craig was the most-read blogger for “Her” magazine, which translated to a Monday print column in the D&C, and for 15 years wrote the weekly “Families” column for Messenger Post. At the same time this Harvard University graduate was live on the radio giving lifestyle advice on WARM-101.3 with Tony Infantino and Dee Alexander for almost 20 years, while raising her own two children. Her most recent radio show was “Change Your Life With Dr. Meami Craig!” on WHAM-1180AM. Our editorial team agreed that “She Rocs” and asked Craig to be our cover photo and cover feature. We also asked her about her passions and thoughts on empowerment. Here’s what she told us … 10

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women nowadays but I take a different twist on that — I say, as I did for myself, look inward and define your real needs being totally honest with yourself. I figured out for one thing that I need to live near water to feel connected to nature and be truly happy, so I took gradual steps to do just that. To be empowered I also had to look at my life and let go of toxic relationships that were draining my energy and hurting my soul’s spirit. I put boundaries on them that are flexible but strong. I also let go of shame and guilt, and forgave even those people in my life who don’t think they need forgiving, for my own sake and theirs too. Did you know negative emotions reside in our body in our fat tissue?

SHE ROCS: What makes you tick? What are you passionate about? MEAMI CRAIG: I put myself first. My family is right there, too, in importance to me, but I’ll bet you’re wondering if I think it’s selfish to put myself first. I struggled with that one for decades and—after years of putting my kids first—I finally reversed it and did the opposite. SR: Why? MC: Well, recently my 30-year-old daughter, Courtaney, spoke to me from her heart about the importance of seeing me, as her mother, love myself before anyone else. She got married in October and confided in me as we were planning her wedding that this was the one thing she needed most from me: to role model true self love and self care before all else.

SR: How do you serve as a role model for self love and self care? MC: It’s a lot more than just bubble baths by candlelight and mani-pedis — although I do include those on a regular schedule. I am very aware that women have to be able to financially afford these niceties. So, many times I’ve done my own mani-pedis because, for me, having my nails bright and happy help makes me feel bright and happy when facing the world with confidence. Self love begins with knowing who you are, owning your mistakes and your triumphs, while taking care of yourself as carefully as you would a small child you are raising. That means getting enough sleep, which we women always hear about, but how many of us really do? I used to stay up at night until I got it all done, right down to having permission slips properly signed in my kids’ backpacks, even if that meant I was up till 3 a.m. and then on the air at the radio station at 7 a.m. No more! Sleep is sexy. It lets me be vibrant and more alive during my waking hours. Women, rearrange your schedules if you have to, but figure out what self care is to you, as a form of self love, and do THAT as a first priority! Help each other with this, too. Your kids will see it and follow suit so they’ll grow up to be their best selves, too. SR: What empowers women? MC: Having counseled people for so

SR: Whaaaat?! MC: Yes, it is scientifically proven to be true! Recent research shows a protein substance in our bodies called I-l6 causes inflammation in our fascia, which is a layer of fat we all have on our bodies when overstimulated by negative feeling in our brains. It regulates metabolism and helps fight infection hence my theory that losing weight is more than just food-in and exercise-out. It’s a head game; one I have been working on most of my adult life.

SR: What do you do that’s lifeaffirming? MC: I force myself to be honest with myself. I ask myself if am I living my values, with kindness to myself and others, even strangers. I can’t change the past, but I am in total control of how much I let it affect my life in this moment.

many years, I have learned you really can transform someone by loving them who they are right now, in the skin they are in. Just being listened to makes anyone feel empowered and respected. And if there is no one in your life doing that for you then you have to do it for yourself. There’s so much talk about empowerment for

SR: What are you excited about right now, or looking forward to? MC: I am beyond thrilled to say that I am going to be a grandmother for the first time in May! My son Matthew and his beautiful Brazilian wife are going to have a baby boy! The happiest time of my life, so far, has been when my own children were babies and toddlers, so I can’t wait for this part two of that! My only question is what should my grandma name be? Glamma, Nana or Bamma? I ask your readers to call my Happiness Hotline at (585) 432-1010 and vote on my “grandma” name! Or go to my website at Changeyourlifeservices.com. I’d love to hear from you.

Own your mistakes and triumphs and take care of YOU! She Rocs Magazine

March/April 2018

COMMUNITY SPOTLIGHT

What is the mission of the Women’s Foundation of Genesee Valley? To empower and inspire women and girls to achieve economic self-sufficiency and reach their full potential by providing investments in community programs that give a “hand up” to women and their families who are struggling to survive and by providing educational and philanthropic opportunities that encourage teen girls to set career goals and give back to their community. How and when did the Women’s Foundation get started? The Foundation was established in 1994 by a group of nine women who wanted to create lasting social change for women and girls living in poverty in our community. They knew that women and children were disproportionately affected by poverty and began to raise funds for a permanently restricted endowment, interest from which would be used to award grants to programs that have proven successful in lifting women and girls out of poverty. Since that time, the Foundation has invested over $1.3 million dollars in programs offered by The Center for Youth, YWCA, Catholic Charities, Sojourner House and many more. Some of the categories supported are: re-entry after incarceration, employment readiness, financial literacy, college readiness and more.

Local business owner Tricia Lall volunteers as a purse model. PROVIDED PHOTO

What kinds of programming and services does the Women’s Foundation offer? We award grants to programs making a real difference in the lives over 1,200

Tell us about the Women’s Foundation’s partnerships in the community. The Foundation partners with approxi-

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women and girls each year. Increasing a woman’s ability to support herself and her children is the primary goal of our grant making. In addition, our Girls’ Initiative Program helps over 500 under-resourced girls each year set goals to stay in school and plan for a financially independent future through our After School Literacy Program, Voices of Experience event, and Girls Grant Making Committee.

mately 13 organizations serving over 1,000 women and girls each year through our grant awards. The Girls’ Initiative Program partners with over 40 schools, clubs, not-for-profits serving girls and more, reaching over 500 girls each year.

Tell us about the A Purse for Change event. A Purse for Change is the Women’s Foundation of Genesee Valley’s signature event; a fun night of shopping and friendship. In its twelfth year, the event will feature more than 150 brand new purses, ranging from $10 to $1,200, from namebrand designers (and local makers), including, Louis Vuitton, Versace, Michael Kors, Kate Spade, Coach and more. A Purse for Change will be held on Thursday, March 22, where we’ll transform Temple B’rith Kodesh in Brighton into a ladies night out dream come true. Tickets to attend are just $65 (with sponsorship options available that include tickets, advertising and more) and includes complimentary hors d’oeuvres (charitable calories don’t count), wine, purse silent and live auctions, fashion show by Panache Vintage, music and more. All proceeds will benefit women and girls from the Rochester community and the surrounding counties, helping them overcome challenges to become financially independent adults. Share the Women’s Foundation of Genesee Valley’s vision for the future. The Women’s Foundation of Genesee Valley will be recognized as one of the leading organizations in the greater Rochester area focused on women’s economic self-sufficiency, by: • Advocating for women and girls through fundraising, education, research and high-impact grant making • Partnering and collaborating with key institutions, agencies, foundations and corporations • Striving for excellence in all that we do. • Delivering measurable results We will promote greater social change for women and truly make a difference. To learn more and get involved, visit womensfoundation.org or contact Director of Development and Program, Alyssa Belasco, at abelasco@womensfoundation.org.