Dating, or “Courting” Through the Years

In celebration of Valentine’s Day, Happenings discusses the evolution of dating.

Dating or “courting,” as it was called in earlier history, involved a gentleman intentionally spending time with a young lady, usually both members of the same community. Some courtships were arranged by parents, often with financial status as a prerequisite. The young couple would simultaneously get to know each other and evaluate for marriage. The courting was often conducted in the young lady’s home with her family present.

In the 1930s and 40s, dating shifted to places like dance halls, restaurants and theaters. Dating activities also included going on picnics, seeing movies (especially at drive-in theaters), dancing, listening to live music, dining out and visiting bars. Couples met at school, work, weddings and through friends (haven’t we all heard,“My cousin/ friend/ coworker would be great for you!”) The gentleman picked up the tab for any dating expenses.

Today couples connect on dating apps, such as Tinder and Bumble, that geographi cally match available candidates who are looking for love. Share a few fun facts and photos of yourself and you might find that your next Friday night drink is around the corner! Dating apps became even more popular with the pandemic when the only chance to meet someone was a fleeting encounter at the pharmacy or grocery store. The only way to tell if that attractive person in the vitamin aisle was smiling at you was to see if the eyes were crinkling above a mask. Meeting up for dinner or drinks in busy restaurants turned into having dinner or drinks on Zoom. Suddenly everyone knew what it felt like to be in a long distance relationship!

The way couples communicate certainly has changed a great deal also. In the past, with landline-only phones, privacy was limited! Gentlemen would “telephone” the lady’s home to ask for a minute to chat. No telling who might pick up on the other end while sweet nothings were being whispered. Today, text messaging, Instagram Direct Messages, FaceTime video calls and even Snapchat conversations are all forms of staying in touch with your crush without having anyone else know!

While women have become a great deal more comfortable exuding confidence, many still expect the man to initiate the first date. Decades ago, when a young lady returned from a first date, she would be expected to tell her parents how it went and if she anticipated a second call from the gentleman. Either candidate now can certainly take more initiative and that is a welcome sign of the times.

Now Happenings wants to hear from you. Share a fun dating experience and you just might be featured in a future issue! Email us at info@happeningspa.com H