It Aint Mine But It Hits Good

BY MSS OREGON

Everyone's had that one spliff that just keeps going out no matter how many times you light it. You look at your perfectly rolled blunt and question your own skills like: did I roll it too tight? Or maybe the weed was still wet… wait wait nah nah it was the paper that's right the rello that was defective & it’s no way it could have been you. Cause with all the effort and right ingredients this shit should be hitting like a pro. I swear that’s how dating feels. Things seem great then they just go out & you keep trying but the shit ain’t right.

Like it's not always about the looks. It could be beautifully rolled. You can even make sure you have the best intentions stuffed inside. For the most part, it hits and shit tastes good but you gotta keep lighting it or stopping it from running, WHY? Why can't shit just catch on its own? Why do we put so much effort on some shit that ain’t gonna stay lit long enough to get you high or do shit for you? No one likes wasting their weed or their heart. But we've all done it.

For 5 months I was smoking someone else’s weed or should I say dating someone else’s man and didn't even know it. It tasted so good & everything except one key element seemed perfect... He'd leave in the middle of the night. We could spend the entire day together but once 4am hit, that blunt was gone! I was in no rush to play house and so him leaving never bothered me and was secretly preferred. To be honest, I never buy just one kind of weed when I shop anyway. So when he had to go, I could tend to my other priorities. Them good morning text come in strong after 7 AM and if you’re in my bed you’re gonna hear every damn ding. And I mean I'm not a player, I just crush a lot & my life brings on lots of prospects. But that all gets ignored when you think you got that right match, even with them big ass red flags. Literally, a red flag could fall on my head and I'd ignore it because he fucks me good, buys me jewelry, doesn't call too much & feeds me tacos upon request.

I mean they all look like white flags when your twitterpated and each kiss is the equivalent of your 1st hit of weed.

You know the way the smoke feels on your tongue and your head starts feeling clouded. There are no real thoughts coming in just stares and giggles. We'd lay and play with each other’s fingertips and talk about running away together. I was so high off this perfectly rolled blunt that I didn't even realize it was some reggie & I never questioned where it came from when in all realness I shoulda pulled up leafly info on this MF.

I mean I had other weed I could have rolled up but I thought I had found a strain that I liked and I swear I was gonna try and grow that shit at home myself. Recently it has come to my realization that no matter how I try to roll with this weed it’s gonna run. The rello is irrelevant, there is no backwood, swisher or dutch that could help keep shit running smoothly. Some strains are just not that good in blunts & your better off just trying something else.

What's a side piece?

A side piece is someone you are intimate with on a regular basis. The catch is your spouse doesn't know. Often as a side piece you can expect a half ass relationship because the person is not fully yours. Most of us wouldn’t want to be someone's dirty little secret. Then there are some who see value in the rewards of this position such as gifts, getaways, good sex, money and someone else does thier laundry. Being or having a side piece can be dangerous and cause a ton of drama. Be wise in your decisions and remember that what comes around goes around.

5 ways to tell if your a side piece:

They don’t stay the night

They don’t take you out in public

You’ve never spent a Holiday together

They’re always in different vehicles

They don’t take no pictures with you

Don’t be a lost nug under a couch, if you have a dating story that should be shared please send them to+ my IG @Mss_Oregon for a chance to be featured in this column.