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ISSUE 10 oct 30th, 2008 www.theHvoice.com
HOW WE LOST OUR VIRGINITY: THE HYACINTH MACAW SHOW
Great special effects, amazing performances How to survive an indie party?
The louder you scream, the more naked you’ll see!
Voice Writer Zach Sniderman offers an easy-to-use manual
INSIDE Halloween parties, how to kill your gpa, Crema Cafe...
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VOICES
between, after or during class.
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this is where you tell the campus what you think
featured The courage to blogger write this blog Juli Min
I raised my hand and asked her timidly when it was that she knew she was a good writer. Elizabeth Strout crossed her long legs and answered, “i think i’ve known since very early on that i had the capacity to be a really good writer. But it wasn’t until ‘Amy and Isabelle’ that i knew i was doing really good stuff. At that point, I was forty.” Saying that you want to be a writer is different than saying that you want to be a banker, or a consultant, for more reasons than the obvious. Sure, the hours are different, the pay is a hell of a lot different, and the life-
post
style is, to say the least, not as glamorous. But the main issue is that you’re not legitimately recognized as a “writer” until you’ve gotten something material, something real, some pretty, clean book in your hands with your name on it in big braille letters, to prove it. The road to being a writer is an unthankful one, an anonymous one, and one that is wracked with doubt from all parties including your very own. There is no set path, no distinct levels of success that one must be promoted to each year. And so the thing that one needs more than anything - or
your weekly agenda
LEM SETS...
NEVERMIND THE PROB
at least that i need more than anything in this process - is not so much a Case in Point guide, or a meeting at OCS, but instead simply words of encouragement, support, and inspiration. I think i’ve been telling my mother for the past few years that I want to write. And I’m pretty sure she’s been in denial about it for the past few years in return. This summer, things came to a head when she encouraged me to pursue e-recruiting; i wanted to get a fellowship and travel; i wanted to work in publishing; i wanted most of all to write.
Saturday November 1st
ALUMNI VOICE!
ERIC KESTER ‘08
• Class of ‘08 • Winthrop • Anthropology and Archaeology • Currently @ New England Patriots Business Development
The Low-Down: “When you step through the Harvard gates don’t fall into the trap of labeling yourself. Drop the stereotypes – pre-meds, I-bankers, etc. Follow your passions, but also make sure to experience a wide range of things.”
from the EMAILS “Is this zombie competition for real? Where did you guys gey the food for it??”
“Dear Allison is still not replying to my emails. :-(“
“I love your reviews page! Short, funny, informative. But why not do more movies and books?”
“Cover student groups! There’s a lot going on.”
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Have your say!
Join the online discussion!
“I want some juicy gossip. Thank you.”
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shows festivals culture concerts parties lectures sports
Heaven & Hell Meet Again Heaven & Hell: Your favorite places to be nice and naughty all under one roof in the same night. Get hot and sweaty in chaste and devilish costumes with your gorgeous friends.
Catwalk in Annenberg Costume Catwalk in Annenberg: Freshmen bond in this annual costume contest. Strut your stuff on the catwalk and wow the judges with your impersonation. Though freshmen may not win something as cool as you could at a real club, we prepare them well for the real world here at Harvard don’t we?
A supercharged show you can’t miss
Saturday, November 1st
ts n e v e com! e r i o . e m c i t o ou heHv k c e ch www.t at
Theater Oct 30-Nov 1 at 8 PM Oct. 25 and Nov 2 at 2:30 PM $8 for students. $12 for others A supercharged performance of dancing and acting. Expressive and poignant, this is a must see of the season. Tantalize your imagination with unexpected props and themes, a diverse cast and this fast paced performance.
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Parting Glances: Gay life in the late 80s BGLTSA Screening: Pforzheimer House on Tuesday November 18 at 9PM—“Parting Glances” examines gay life in the late 80s. Michael and Robert are a couple in New York and Robert is leaving for a twoyear work assignment in Africa. The couple deal with this change as well as issues with friends, including AIDS.
Friday, October 31st
The Slumber Party Massacre Friday at 10pm, Underbar, Tremont St, Boston Transformed into a cheesy ‘80s horror set, complete with killers, sexy women, and beds, Underbar will host a great dance party. The best part is: the winner of the costume contest and his or her friends will instantly be upgraded to VIP status with a reserved table and all the amenities. Also included in the prize are free tickets to Benny Benassi and David Guetta. Cover: $15.
4 campus buzz
between, after or during class.
CARA LONERGAN
THE HYACINTH MACAW PREMIERE:
More pics on
theHvoice.co
A SPECTACLE! With fantastic special effects and even better performances. BY BRIAN SHEN
like a young Uma Thurman, speaking quirkily from her soul. And the charismatic Jack Cutmore-Scott, Alex Breaux, and Zach Sniderman add comic relief to the revela-
Spectacles abound in Harvard’s premiere of “The Hyacinth Macaw” on a grand set that realistically portrays a country house in a moonworld far different and yet so similar to ours. Sarah If you like a new Sherman genre of theater that is beyond postperforms like a modernist, where young Uma t i o n s form and meaning Thurman of the do correspond but women in absurd verbosity is the story. equally present, then Though, not this is the production for a play for any you. Breaking beyond the Friday night, the audithree walls of theater, this ence at this premiere play acknowledges construcwas in awe of the briltions of fiction and entices the liance of the perforaudience with strange utter- mance. ances, fantastical special effects, and an intellectually challenging story. Tali Friedman, playing Susannah, provides “The Hyacinth Macaw” a not so innocent, yet naive at The Loeb Mainstage perspective of Directed by Marcus Stern the world. And Sarah Sherman, Produced by Allison Kline playing mother and Beth Shields Dora, performs
FROM THE PREMIERE GALA: AUD
CARA LONERGAN
5 MNEMONIC Show that justifies the pleasure of theater
Probably the best show to see this season BY BRIAN SHEN
CARA LONERGAN
om
Mnemonic begins with leaves. That’s really all I can tell you. It begins with leaves, and ends with nakedness. So, seeing this show is the perfect way to make love to fall. Mnemonic is the number one performance to go to this season, and my favorite of any show I’ve seen at Harvard. Poignant without being preachy, searching without particularly caring to find, funny and sexy the whole way through
with an awesome sound- neously, so your eye and track, Mnemonic imagination are never is huge fun. in want of stimulaIt combines tion. It explores dance, telememory with The vision, a cast as dishow is fabric that verse as it is incredibly h a n g s talented, as fast-paced from the explosively ceiling, ice, energetic as it and many is defiantly uniother good fied. Every so ofthings into one ten a show arrives cohesive hourthat justifies the pleaand-a-half show. sure of performing and It is incredibly fastthe pleasure of theatre paced, often with many going. Mnemonic is such scenes occurring simulta- a show.
Bestiality, love, homosexuality and pedophilia
ALISHA RAMOS
CARA LONERGAN
DIENCE WAS IN TOTAL AWE
BY BRIAN SHEN Nearly every seat was filled at the opening night of “The Goat, or Who is Sylvia?” at Adam’s Pool Theater last Thursday, October 23. Despite a couple stutters, the audience was wowed by the often perplexing play—at times hysterical and at times physically uncomfortable— that left viewers’ mouths gaping in utter disbelief. Situational irony, a prodding pace of
the realization of Martin’s own realization (or lack thereof) of what he’s done, and random slapstick comedy scattered about work well together to create an emotional and cognitive rollercoaster not unlike what the characters themselves experience. Defamiliarization of the idea “The Goat, or Who is Sylvia” at The Adams Pool Theater Directed by Davida FernandezBarken Produced by Jan Luksic and Jack Turban
of love, word games, and grammatical arguments among anguished shouting, smashing objects, and shattered glass—not to mention the superb acting which oddly reminded me of Dr. Haan of “Grey’s Anatomy” and Emmet Honneycut from “Queer As Folk (USA)” —made this play incredibly entertaining. This play explores ideas of bestiality, homosexuality, and pedophilia. Viewer discretion is advised.
6 reviews
listen, read, watch, sing, inhale.
After getting himself into electric guitars last week, our Review Czar Doubet crawls back towards pop
Funhouse
A Hundred Million Suns Snow Patrol
Pink
Bombastic house of fun, Sigur Rós with words Pink’s latest album, Funhouse, starts off on a silly, immensely fun note with the album’s first single, “So What.” It’s a great track full of power chords, twittering synth, and some respectable rock n’ roll singing by Pink, and the track’s a fine start to the album. Unfortunately, there’s some real stinkers sprinkled in with the good cuts on the album. “I Don’t Believe You” was too slow and too unmemorable to hold my attention, and “Crystal Ball” sounds kind of like Fleetwood Mac’s “Landslide” if it was boring and not good. Still, I’ve got to give it to Pink, she’s a powerful singer, and,
on “Sober” there are faint echoes of Janis Joplin in her voice. That’s only a plus in my book. Overall, Funhouse does what the title might suggest: it provides a fun fifty minutes of listening. Pink’s songs on this album are, at times, the female equivalents of Andrew W.K.’s party ‘til you can’t party any more anthems, if less bombastic. The production’s a little quirky, much like the production on Fergie’s The Duchess, and you’re guaranteed to bob your head along to a good part of Funhouse.
Listen!
Editor’s Choice: So What, Sober, Please Don’t Leave Me, Bad Influence
The Metal Playlist
by Vjeran Pavic
1. 2. 3.
Black Metal - Venom Hate Crew Deathroll (live)- Children Of Bodom War Is My Sheppard - Exodus
I can’t remember more than a handful of lyrics from Snow Patrol’s latest, A Hundred Million Suns, but that’s not really the point of the music. Snow Patrol excells in majesty and dense production more than they ever excelled at pop-oriented hooks. And that’s both a strength and a weakness. It’s a strength because on this album Snow Patrol gives us music that’s easy to get lost in. A Hundred Million Suns is all soft and plush, there are no hard edges to jar you or hurt your ears. If you let it, the music will wrap around you like a familiar comforter. The mu-
sic sounds like Sigur Rós with words. On the other side of the coin though, is the weakness. “A Hundred Million Suns” tends to become one big mushy stream of sound. It’s enjoyable to crank up and let the sound wash over you, but there’s not much to differentiate one song from the next. Your ears might perk up to “Lifeboats,” but only because the song doesn’t attack you with a wall of sound quite so much as the other tracks on the album. Still, while most the song’s sound similar, the album as a whole presents a journey worth taking.
Listen!
4. 5. 6. 7. 8. 9. 10.
Fear Of The Dark - Iron Maiden Nothing Else Matters - Metallica Raining Blood - Slayer Bark At The Moon - Ozzy Glass Prison - Dreak Theater Rapid Fire - Judas Priest Through Fires and Flames - DragonForce
What are your fav metal songs?
7 ALBUM REVIEW: In yet another alt / indie extravaganza, Voice Reviewer Matt Sachs explores the Okkervil River
A lively mix of Johnny Cash, Motown ballads and indie rock A little less pop-based, with some unconventional
instrumentation
BY MATT SACHS The band for this week is a little less pop based and utilizes more unconventional instrumentation. There is a chance that you’ll be turned off from the first couple notes, but give the songs a try and I promise you’ll come to appreciate what you hear. Okkervil River formed in 1998 in Austin, Texas and immediately fell into the indie rock/ folk rock scene. After recording their first album in a garage, they were invited the play in the South by Southwest music festival and got a record deal. Their most recent album, The Stand Ins, was released in September as a sequel to last year’s release, The Stage Names. The CD as a whole lends itself at times to a folksy-bluesy feel due to the guitar timbre, interesting percussion and the mournful, soulful voice (reminiscent of the 50’s vibe of the band The National) of singer Will Sheff. The first song on the album, Lost Coastlines, opens the CD with a tingly guitar part, backed up with a banjo and Sheff’s syrupy voice. Flowing effortlessly into a chorus driven by unusual percussive beats, the song is one of the best on the album. The CD experiments with more rock and roll, Jonny
Okkervile River: The Stand Ins Cash-like songs and even a Motown inspired ballad entitled The Starry Stairs. Complete with a sultry horn section, rock guitar rifts, eerie organ playing, and string accompaniment, it’s hard to predict where each song, or even the CD for that matter, is going. The CD ends with, in my opinion, the best song on the track. Bruce Wayne Campbell Interviewed On The Roof of the Chelsea Hotel, 1979 begins very
dark and depressing, but slowly builds with the addition of the drums and accordion riffs. As Sheff’s voice grows and the keyboard drives the suspense, the song erupts into a catchy, upbeat, indescribable tune that reminds one of Mark Knopfler. The song ends with only the keyboard and string section sustaining the final chords, leaving the listener yearning for more, yet satisfied at the same time.
If you’re into any type of folk/blues music, seriously consider looking into Okkervil River for a change of pace. If you’re not, there is enough rock and roll vibes in the CD to get you going. As always, feel free to make a suggestion as to a band you want me to cover. Enjoy!
reviews I was really out of ideas on what to write here. Alex Doubet is the golden god of our galaxy?
Panic! Jonas Brothers! Halloween! YouTube Review: Panic! At the Disco – It’s Almost Halloween The members of Panic! At the Disco look like they had a great ol’ time making the music video for “It’s Almost Halloween.” Chances are, you’ll have a pretty good time watching it as well. The video has a homemade, herky-jerky feel to it that adds to the maniacal fun of the Panic! guys running around in truly goofy homemade (by the looks of them)
costumes. The scene switches back and forth from a forest to a room party, but regardless of where the camera’s looking, you’ll at least smile a couple of times.
YouTube Review – Lovebug – Jonas Brothers The Jonas Brothers’ “Lovebug” has a laidback feel to it, and I found myself thinking about Jack Johnson’s music for most of the video.
But “Lovebug” doesn’t have the coolness of Jack Johnson, the voice of Jack Johnson, or the hooks of Jack Johnson. Instead, it’s a story that looks to be set in the 1940s about newlyweds and a husband getting shipped off to war. I wrote the video off as completely boring until suddenly, out of literally nowhere, electric guitars come blistering through my speakers in a solo. But they didn’t make the video anymore interesting. It’s clichéd, slow, and fraught with singing that’s not quite good enough to carry it off.
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fashion & shopping
BOO! NEED A COSTU
Halloween is tomorrow. You have no costume (and refuse to go the cliche route). It’s election day in 2 w Dress up like a famous political figure! With everyone’s eyes on the campaign trails these days, it will d ate, not to mention convenient, to attire yourself in a celebrity-politician costume. Here are the Voice’s i
Boys Abe Lincoln
The wise 16th President of the United States is fairly easy to replicate. Find a top hat and beard, put on your best suit and most presidential bowtie… and maybe carry a log around with you, as a symbol of your beloved log cabin? Oh—and if you happen to have a copy of Uncle Tom’s Cabin around, that’s probably a good hint as well (albeit chronologically out of order).
Joe Biden
This may be a bit more strenuous, but some major Crest White Strips are needed, or if you’re willing to go all out, bleach your teeth. Make sure you’re constantly smiling and talking about how gorgeous your wife is, and how in love you are with her, still. Maybe carry a copy of “The Office” and remind everyone that you’re from Scranton, Pennsylvania, a very important state in this election.
Girls Sarah Palin
Dressing up as the former mayor of Wasilla, Alaska should be no problem. Just tease your hair and smooth it into a half-up, high bun, find some square Tina-Fey-ish glasses, don a form-fitting skirtsuit… oh, and a rifle of some sort is necessary. Perhaps some dead game too. Say “I can see Russia from my house!” and the word “maverick” as much as possible. And bonus points for getting a girl friend to dress up as her pregnant daughter and walk around submissively behind you.
M
G no cl be M sk pr cl
John Kerry
Easy: puff up your hair, wear a suit, and flip-flops.
Betsey Ross
ATTENTION READERS:
DO YOU WANT TO WIN A FULL MAKE-OVER (AKA HAIR, MAKEUP, FACIAL, THE WORKS) FROM CARRIAGE HOUSE SALON? THEN E-MAIL tong@fas.harvard.edu with the reason why you absolutely need it!!
Pay homage to the creator of our American flag by donning a cute little bonnet cap, and wrapping a flag around your body. Needle and thread optional.
UME?
weeks. What do you do? definitely be appropri—Irene Yuan ideas:
Monica Lewinsky
Good old Monica is a classic. Though ot actually a politician, she comes as lose as anyone to having celebrity-status ecause of politics (gone bad). For your Monica outfit, you’ll need a blue dress/ kirt-suit, a beret, bright red lipstick, and robably some mysterious stains on your lothes.
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spotted... ...in the Yard We spotted sophomore Ian Choe in front of Widener, and thought, “He’s technically not wearing anything out of the ordinary, but it just looks like a great outfit.” Choe says the key to his style is buying a lot of simple and fitted pieces. “I try to get the complexity out of combining items rather than buying really intricate items,” he says. “I have a lot of clothes in general.” For Choe, clothes are a form of personal expression. “I feel like taking the time to put a lot of consideration into your look is a good form of active communication even if you’re not reaching out to anybody in specific,” he told the Voice. —Anna Tong
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Hat, Fake BAPE bought in Korea, $20 “BAPE hats are both rare and expensive.”
2.
Shirt, Abercrombie, $18 “I felt like a scrub, but it’s comfortable and fitted.”
3.
Jacket, Banana republic, $135 “It’s nice and it’s not too heavy so it functions as just casual outerwear.”
4.
Jeans, AG Jeans, on sale for $60 “They’re comfortable but they have a slim fit.”
5.
Bag, Ferragamo, got it as a gift “It’s small and light but the size is great for carrying a few books.”
Ian Choe Sophomore Dunster House
12 a deeper look
it should matter to you, too. hopefully.
HOW WE LOST OUR VIRGIN BY ALISHA RAMOS AND KATE MA
Rocky Horror: The louder you scream, the more naked you’ll see! CHECK OUT THE AMAZING HALLOWEEN SCREENING!
What was it like to lose our virginity? Overall it was a little awkward, but there were a few mind-blowingly pleasurable moments to make up for it. And by “losing our virginity,” we mean that we finally attended a midnight showing of the cult classic, The Rocky Horror Picture Show (RHPS). Obviously. Our bizarre adventure begins at 11:45PM on Saturday night. As we approach the Loews Theater on Church Street, we’re greeted by the strange sight of people dressed as hookers, sluts, trannies, and other creatures of the night. The show doesn’t start until midnight, but already the line stretches down the entire street. There are girls in skinbaring fishnet bodysuits, guys in tight dresses, and a generous amount of leather all around - in the form of whips, jackets, and boots. One girl behind us tugs playfully on a chain – which is connected to a collar worn by her half-naked male friend. One male attendee is wearing a gold sequin dress, matching top hat, and rouged lips. He explains to us that he’s dressed as “Columbia,” a character in RHPS. “But you can also call me by my drag name: Ezmerelda D’Lite.” When we ask him how many times he’s seen RHPS, he confidently replies with, “Over fifty.” As it grows closer to midnight, Tracy the security guard goes over some ground rules for the night: “We’re like a high-class strip joint—we can touch you, but you can’t touch us.” She also gives us some tips: “The louder you scream, the more naked you’ll see!” With this pronouncement, the crowd erupts in cheers. There are men in black coats who saunter up and down the line, scoping for “Rocky Virgins.” Soon, we’re spotted and our foreheads are branded with bright red V’s: inconspicuous signs of our “virginity.” We’re both kind of nervous, so we ask some experienced Rocky-goers to give us Rocky Virgins their best piece of advice. The answers range from “Good luck” to “I’m trying to think of something appropriate for print.” Great! Soon, everyone
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NITY : A SPECIAL REPORT The wildest show in the Square!
If you asked us, we wouldn’t be able to tell you what Rocky Horror was about. We would probably say something along the lines of: “Transvestites, Susan Sarandon’s boobs, outer space, and lots of fishnet.” But knowing what the movie is about isn’t the point of going to see RHPS. In fact, our consensus after the show was: “What the hell just happened?” The point of going to see Rocky Horror is getting to throw rice and toilet paper at the screen, getting pelvic-thrust by someone you don’t even know during the “Time Warp”, seeing more of a man’s nether regions than you wanted, and yelling things like “SLUT!” and “ASSHOLE!” a lot. As the credits begin to roll, Dr. Frankfurter shouts, “Thank you for coming!” and the audience responds in true Rocky style, “I came twice!” Thus ended our first Rocky Horror experience. Virgins no more, we will a t tend the
“Thank you for coming... I came twice!”
files into the theater and waits for the show to begin – nervous virgins and sexy trannies alike. Before the show, nine Rocky Virgins are called up to the stage and asked to give their best lap dances to three lucky members of the cast and crew. A few awkward and hysterical moments later, a man dressed in drag is announced as the winner and has his “cherry” popped as a reward. A female cast member places a red balloon between
his legs, and proceeds to pop it with her teeth - a symbolic act of inducting not only the winner, but all of the Rocky Virgins into the RHPS cult. Rocky Horror begins with a pair o f
b l o o d red lips mouthing the words to the iconic song, “Science Fiction/
Double Feature.” Immediately, seasoned audience members sing along loudly, and even add in their own bits to the song. Meanwhile a female cast member sings and dances along. She’s wearing a hot pink bra and panties – but those don’t stay on for too long. The audience cheers wildly, and heralds the beginning of a very bizarre and very entertaining show.
next Rocky Horror showing with heads held high and garters in place. Harvard Square’s version of RHPS is produced by the Full Body Cast, who put on the live show nearly every Saturday night. The cast and crew all have day jobs, and are amazingly not paid for their performances. “This is my secret night job,” jokes Tim, the actor who plays Rocky. The show is impressive for one entirely run by volunteers who take care of things ranging from security to lights. There are costumes and props which have been accurately reconstructed to resemble those used in the actual film, and the organization of the team seems to be impeccable. The Full Body Cast actively involves the audience throughout the show and isn’t afraid to push limits - which is part of the fun in going to one of their sexy reenactments. Whether you’re a Rocky Virgin or a die-hard fan, we recommend you go see the special Halloween showing this weekend. It promises to be kinky fun, including a costume contest on stage with “special prizes” for the winners (“A double ended dildo!” promises one cast member).
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15
food & drink
Finally, a place to relax... Voice Editor Kayla Feld might call “Starbucks” her local coffee shop, but Crema Cafe is more homey
BY KAYLA FELD Coming from Seattle, I can back with some degree of legitimacy the claim that Starbucks is my “local” coffee shop. But anyone who has tried to convert the crowded Starbucks Garage location into a habitual study base must have developed a vague sensation that this crowded, busy atmosphere that could have stimulated the mad coffee craze of Seattle. In a city so often accused of miserable weather, it seems fitting that the city would contrive the perfect anecdote to those bleak rainy days – a profusion of comfortable coffee houses that serve warm drinks and allow locals to sit and relax. In Seattle, coffee shops are widely varied, ranging from the plethora of street-corner coffee booths to the cozy local neighborhood model that Starbucks
attempts to emulate. In these by my conversation with Lisa, places, ample sitting room, free co-owner of the recently-opened wireless, homemade (often veg- Café Crema in Brattle Square, an) pastries, and a dedicated lo- when she echoed the same sentical following are the norm. ment. “We had a sense of what Since I have come to Harvard, we wanted from different cafes I have sought to reproduce this we’ve seen in our travels, and homey environment where I when we came back to Boston could study and meet up with we were always looking for that friends around the square, but same type of environment, but have encountered little success. never quite found a place where The coffee shops around we could eat and hang out here seem to seek to for a while,” Liza said. perform a more After graduating functional purpose from University of Cus– you get in, grab Michigan, Liza and tomares are your coffee, and fellow co-owners encouraged to rush off to your Tom and Marley share tables and next engagement. looked for a place make friends While the utility that would offer of this cannot be a combination of underestimated, I quality food and a was looking for a little pleasant atmosphere. more. According to Liza, “we wantApparently I was not the ed to combine our passion for only one looking for such food and people by creating a an environment, as confirmed relaxing atmosphere that facili-
tates work, meetings or casual conversations” They sought to create a place where people could come and feel a sense of familiarity and connection to the location, whether as a regular customer or a tourist just passing through. 29 April, 2008, Café Crema officially opened to the public, and it seems to have already gained a dedicated crowd of followers since then. The unfortunate result of this popularity is a bit of a line at the counter (although baristas are usually efficient at mitigating wait time), and some difficulty in procuring a seat during busy hours. Customers
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Have your say!
What’s your fav coffee place?
are encouraged to share tables and make friends, which fits with the openly friendly atmosphere the owners wanted to create in the first place. Serving up tasty-looking specialty sandwiches (such as turkey, brie, apple), unique pastries (thing rum-raisin bread pudding, amazing browning), and flavorful coffee, the food they offer lives up to their goals of quality. With its friendly staff and relentless desire to provide a comfortable and relaxing atmosphere, it seems this new addition to the Harvard neighborhood will be sticking around for a while.
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16 a deeper look
it should matter to you, too. hopefully.
RACHEL LIBESKIND
Behind on your readings?
Voice Reporter has some great advice on how to kill your GPA
Forget the coursepack. Read comic books... at 3 AM!
BY JACK HOLKEBOER
f you ever walk by 99 Mt. Auburn Street in the wee hours of the morning, you might see Tony Davis reading comics. Though the store officially closes at 9 or 10 P.M. most nights, the proprietor of Million Year Picnic has been known to stay open much later flipping through his store’s dizzying collection. One of three comic shops in Harvard Square,
the Picnic has been around since 1974, originally the brainchild of the now-defunct Harvard Comic Club. Davis started working there in 1983; he later became their old comic buyer and eventually bought the store in 1989. A walking encyclopedia of comic book history, the warm and friendly Davis greets many of his customers by name. “Some people have been buying here for twenty-five years,” he said. A
The first step into the store can be a bit overwhelming whiteboard the wall est arriv-
o n shows the latals. There are
shelves, boxes, crates, and filing cabinets full of more comic books than you thought existed. Claustrophobes beware: The whole place isn’t much bigger than an average dorm common room, and the isles are narrow. “We used to have a lot more space,” recalled Davis. Rising rents and a fire in the nineties forced the Picnic to use its limited square footage wisely. But the cozy floor plan, only adds to
its unique charm. For someone like me who knows next to nothing about comics, the first step into Million Year Picnic can be a bit overwhelming. The back of the store is overflowing with old and rare back issues. There have all the superheroes you’ve heard of (Spiderman, Batman, etc.), and many more you haven’t (Lobster Girl, Emo Boy, a communist Superman). My personal favorite
was Larry B. Max, the superauditor from “a little-known department of the IRS” who hunts down tax dodgers all over the globe. But comics aren’t just about chasing bad guys anymore. “Fifty-five percent of our sales are actually books and graphic novels,” explained Davis. Many tell gripping tales from scenes like the Holocaust and the Bosnian War and cater to an older audience. So forget what you know about comics and the people who read them. The Million Year Picnic leaps over tall stereotypes in a single bound.
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RACHEL LIBESKIND
17 :
18 weekend fun
staying in? going out? read these for fun.
Voice Writer Zach Sniderman tackles the indie-kidz and advocates of high culture. With a bit of irony.
How to survive an indie-kidz party: a comprehensive survival manual for the inexperienced BY ZACH SNIDERMAN Indie-kidz parties can be terrifying if you haven’t read Joyce, or don’t own a lot of black. The Advocates of high culture sometimes assume that the rest of us can keep up, but it only takes one Indie-kidz party to show the necessity of some sort of manual. A how-to in surviving the many twists and turns of the skinny-jeaned, scarf-wearing few. Here, in easy categories, is this writer’s best attempt at creating that manual. Books: Any book you can’t really understand is a sure fire hit… Finnegan’s Wake is the consummate trump card. If someone mentions a writer you don’t know, say their Kafka-esque, then sigh, saying they’ll never really be Kafka. Terms to know: stream of consciousness, death of the author, penopticon. Music: If it sounds like you can dance to it and also cry, it’s probably going to go over well. The golden rule of music: no band is good anymore. You used to like them until this very moment. For example, Radiohead’s always good… but not lately. Conversely, it’s ok to like songs that were popular, then everyone hated: it makes you super
edgy. Terms to know: Velvet Underground, release party, first new wave. Fashion: It should look like it hurts to wear, especially if you’re a guy. Make sure to wear just enough pattern that when you walk, you look like an optical illusion – likes those pictures where if you stare hard enough, and for long enough you will see a
sailboat. It’s ok to Poetry: Like books, wear H&M if you find something say you hate it you can’t underAlways (you don’t have stand without a remember: it to hate it). Aldictionary, or a was better in the ternatively, wear couple drinks. original! big vests, fur Anything Allen hats, and plaid. Ginsberg did is Dress rugged, style great, his heart is hard work. Terms was in it. Every to know: comme des Indie Kid has a stock garcons, homosocial, of several poets they love, Una’s. but there is only one that re-
the voice PUBLISHER STEVEN R. DUQUE
Movies: Movies are a mainstream genre, they don’t count as ‘art,’ unless you made it for class. If you are forced to speak about movies, go foreign, Goddard usually works. Don’t worry if you haven’t seen the movie, no one else has anyways. Also, movies are fine, but the book is always better. Terms to know: nouvelle vague, semiotics, montage.
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ally speaks to them. This is the writer they think about when they write their own poetry. Come up with some of your own favorite poets, extra points if you completely make them up. Terms to know: hermeneutic anxiety, poststructuralism, diachronic anachronism. Theatre: This is true art. Theatre has a fourth wall that the
best actors like to break. If the audience knows they are watching a play, it is a good play… unless it’s a high school show, then it’s a ‘bad’ play. If you left the show happy, it wasn’t art. If you left feeling sick because of what the actors did – you can talk about it at the party. They’ll smile and nod: they’re going to New York to ‘make it.’ Terms to know: schadenfreude, abject
theatre, maitre-d. Role Models: Pretty much anyone that broke something on stage, on purpose. Test the water with names like ‘Courtney Love,’ or ‘Sid and Nancy.’ It usually helps if the role model ‘could have been so much more’ but was too sad to live up to their potential. Stay away from musical theatre, just, in general. Bonus points if you can dress up like them for Halloween. Terms to know: ennui, rebel, wayfarers. Small Talk/Jokes: Don’t laugh don’t laugh don’t laugh don’t laugh don’t laugh… Mention Spanish artists that weren’t Frida… who was Mexican, but people get that wrong all the time. Be confident and sensitive, and always leave promising you’ll do coffee later. Terms to know: death drive, insomnia, ‘venti.’ With this manual in mind, go out in the world as the new advocates of counterculture. Remember, if you ever get into trouble: it was better in the original, you never loved her, and, if all else fails – nobody really knows you anyways.
BUSINESS TEAM DIRECTOR OF OPERATIONS NICHOLAS PAPAMICHAEL MAN. OF STRAT. ADVERTISEMENT CARMEN COLLYNS MAN. OF DISTRIBUTION ZACH FRANKEL DIR. OF COMMUNICATIONS MATTHEW LEE MAN. OF EVENTS DEREK FLANZRAICH MAN. OF COMM. RELATIONS CATHERINE CHUTER DIR. OF TELEVISION ERIC PATERNOT STRAT. ADVERT. CONSULTANT MARGARITA KRIVITSKI STRAT. ADVERT. CONSULTANT MARTA BRALIC COMM. CONSULTANT ELSA PAPAREMBORDE BUS. CONSULTANT THOMAS WIONZEK
REPORTERS ELIZABETH NICHOLAS CHARLOTTE AUSTIN IRENE YUAN ANDY LIVINGSTON PROF. JASON KAUFMAN ADAM GOLDENBERG MICHAEL GLADSTONE WOLF RADIC DOMINIC DENUNZIO ALLISON BAUM LAUREL TAINSH LINGBO LI BRIAN SHEN CRISTOPHER LIM JOSHUA FEBLOWITZ PAIGE HOLTZMAN
19
DEAR
ALLISON
Allison Baum Voice Columnist
I just found out my roommates are gay. And I’m homophobic :-/ Dear Allison, I recently had the honor of attending a really cool date event with this cute guy from one of my classes. We had a great time and I think I was a pretty good date, if I may say so myself. Even though I didn’t know him that well before the event, it felt like we connected. I haven’t heard from him since and I’m afraid I may have done something wrong. Why hasn’t he called? Sincerely, Dated and Confused Dear Dated, There are obviously a lot of things that could be going on here. 1) He has a girlfriend and hasn’t mentioned her. 2) You weren’t that great of a date and he’s just not that into you (sorry). 3) He’s busy with other stuff and will call you in a few days. It’s impossible to say, so your best bet is to stop worrying about it, occupy yourself with other things,
and wait it out. Be sure to look good when you see him in class and if he doesn’t call after that, just move on.
your relationship, but the scenario he is presenting is not only extremely e gotistical and unlikely, it’s pathetic and manipulative. If he felt neglected, he should have brought it up so that you could work through it together. Instead of finding the courage to speak up, he cheated on you to get your attention. Babies cry because they don’t have the ability to tell you they’re hungry or that
My bf cheated on me, and I was devastated. Then he blamed me for it.
Dear Allison, My boyfriend recently cheated on me and I was devastated. I thought things were going great and it came sort of out of the blue. I did what I thought was right and ended things right after I found out, even though I still love him. Now he’s begging me to take him back, but he’s also insisting it was my fault that he cheated. He says I didn’t love him enough and he felt “abandoned” so he had to turn to someone else for comfort. Could this be true? I want to be strong but I miss him so much. Sincerely, Still Attached Dear Attached, I don’t know anything about
i
they wet themselves. You deserve to be with a man, not a baby. Dear Allison, I just found out that two of my roommates are gay. I think one of them may have accidentally heard me making fun of him... I’m kind of homophobic. What should I do to avoid any further complications and awkwardness? Sincerely, A Fretting Freshman
of all, apologize to your roommates. Regardless of whether or not he heard you making fun of him, he is probably aware that you disapprove and that can be seriously damaging. It’s never okay to be judgmental of other people’s sexual preferences, and you should learn to live with your roommates as they are. If there are specific things you feel uncomfortable with, let them know, but otherwise just mind your own business and prove that you are intelligent enough to have an open mind.
Dear Freshman, Well, first of all, stop being an immature homophobe. Second
Have your say!
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