Coming Out and Coming of Age: The Complex Role of Fashion in the LGBTQ+ Community

COMING OUT AND COMING OF AGE

THE COMPLEX ROLE OF FASHION IN THE LGBTQ+ COMMUNITY

The entrance into college is a time of self-discovery and +self-reflection for every student. Being exposed to new ideas and being able to express oneself in different ways is an exciting part of the development of a young student’s identity. However, for LGBTQ+ students, it can be the very first opportunity to express their true selves and partake in that self-discovery outside the bounds of their own mind. Being away from home for typically the first time, many young students are able to come out, or at least begin to express their gender and sexuality apart from the constraints of their home lives or small-town high schools. Fashion is a vital component of self-expression, and the development of a specific style directly impacts the self-actualization of adolescents in the LGBTQ+ community.

Fashion exists at the crossroads of identity and self-expression. The unique environment of college allows for students to experiment with their particular style and identity. Young members of the LGBTQ+ community are able to seek out and connect with one another, and the strength in those numbers creates a network of like-minded individuals who offer unconditional support during the adolescence of college. For many students, this is the first time they are able to do so without fear of retribution or punishment from parents, guardians, or their peers. Discovering a community of fellow LGBTQ+ students can aid in having the support necessary to come out, as well as to figure out how one wishes to express themselves. The repressed feelings and identities of LGBTQ+ students finally have an outlet, which can result in a renaissance of self-discovery and style.

This unique coming of age is best told by actual members of the LGBTQ+ community. All four of the interviewees have their own unique experiences to share, many of them centering around their newfound ability to express themselves, whether that be due to coming out or moving out. All four speak to the experience of seeing fashion as a tool that they can reclaim for themselves, rather than one that can be used to keep them in a box, or trap them between binary forms of expression. All four speak to their experience of fashion being a key component in developing their own sense of self, espe-

-cially in helping them to find community with other members of the LGBTQ+ community.

Alexis Attard is a sophomore at USC whose life has been impacted by her ability to express herself through fashion. To Alexis, fashion is a way to consciously or subconsciously represent her identity as an individual. When she got to college, it was the first time she dabbled in expression, as she had come out just a few months prior. Her Catholic high school had required uniforms, and due to this, she was never able to fully express herself through her clothes. She sees the transition to college as a time to play and find things that make her feel grounded in her being and in her identity — an experience that she believes is universal for young members of the LGBTQ+ community. She believes that fashion is really just a reflection of what you like and how you feel in a certain moment, and is special for LGBTQ+ individuals because it gets away from the patriarchal notion of what fashion has traditionally meant. The self-exploration is critical when first coming out, as you can find who you are through fashion. She explains that being out has allowed her spectrum of clothing to broaden, and also has helped her to actually become excited and think about what she wants to wear, and how she is expressing herself. She feels as though “when you aren’t in an environment that is homophobic, you get a free chance to explore yourself without guilt or harm from outside perspectives.” Her style is ever-evolving, and she believes that a person’s fashion and character will never be in a place where things stay the same.

To Tahlia “T” Wise, fashion is the realization that they can dress how they want. Ever since their realization that they are non-binary, they have been able to branch out into fashion styles that are more comfortable and better represent their identity. T loves to be able to dress according to how they feel, rather than how they want to be perceived. Some mornings they wake up feeling more masculine, and some they wake up feeling more feminine, and others they feel neither at all, and being able to express and affirm those feelings through their fashion is incredibly important. Between high school and college, a lot has changed in terms of fashion, but the items in their closet have not. They enjoy reinventing new looks out of

old t-shirts by adding layers and accessories to create a fuller look. Growing up, T often didn’t feel as though they knew how to dress themselves, and while living in a majority conservative and white town, clothes were just something that they had to do, and they weren’t an indicator of who they were. Now, however, their relationship to clothes has vastly improved as they are able to surround themselves with other community members. They believe that fashion in itself is an art form, and for the LGBTQ+ community, art is how they express themselves — it’s a way for people to tell the world that this is who they are. T admits that self-discovery is difficult during a coming of age, but fashion can be used as an aid for that. They reference the fact that they struggle with whether or not they want to dress feminine for the sake of themselves, or as a performance for men and the overarching patriarchy. Because of this, T is trying to be who they want to be, outside of the bounds of both the male gaze and the gender binary, and the freedom that fashion provides for them is invaluable.

Belle Alatorre describes their style as “do-it-yourself” — a notion that leads to a more ethical and creative approach to fashion. They are able to create their own clothes and try out new makeup and hairstyles, which has helped in their self-expression. The more they started dressing like themselves, the more confident they became in themselves and their skin. Belle grew up in a Mexican immigrant family, and they cite this as a reason behind their inability to completely express themselves before moving out for college, due to the strict rules they had to adhere to in terms of fashion. After moving away and arriving at college, they realized they can wear what they want without fear of judgement, and that many people would actually accept them as who they are. Belle doesn’t think of themselves as artistic in a drawing sense, but they do see their body as a palette — they love to do creative makeup looks and dye their hair, anything to express their individuality and their feelings. They feel that “to have things myself and to make them, they make me feel original…I just like to make them feel like myself.” Belle defines their look as alternative, and also believes that those who express themselves with an alternative look often are queer because they are fighting against the norm of everything — fashion is a tool here in

helping to fight against the heteronormative and patriarchal cookie cutter shape of what society says things are supposed to be. They point out that clothing isn’t gendered, and when toxic gender roles are thrust onto young children, and projected onto clothing, fashion can be used as an instrument to restrict — but members of the LGBTQ+ community do not fit those standards, and instead break the mold of society’s notions of “normal”. Belle’s coming of age stems primarily from the idea that fashion and self-expression are fluid, and that they know in their heart that if seven-year-old them saw themselves now, they would be so proud and so awed by who they’ve become and how they express themselves — and that is the most important way for Belle to stay true to their self.

When looking at the role fashion plays in young adults’ lives in the LGBTQ+ community, specifically in college, fashion can allow members of the community to signal their membership to others, without alerting individuals outside of the community. This kind of signaling often relies not on stereotypes, but on the trends present in the LGBTQ+ community. Mel, a non-binary lesbian, states that they believe that “[Fashion] helps me to talk to other queer people.” Following many of these specific trends is quintessential to the experience of LGBTQ+ youth. Mel believes that fashion helps young members of the community to find each other, and that “it’s nice to have someone who is also gay to bounce ideas off of.” This sense of community is often first found in college, which is coincidentally a time when many people are also discovering their sexuality or gender identity. Furthermore, Mel believes that despite many people being separated due to the pandemic, the quarantine has actually allowed for a lot of self-reflection. When comparing how they used to dress in high school as compared to now, they say that “I still dressed like a queer person, but I didn’t dress how I wanted to dress — there were still things that I wanted to do but that I was too intimidated to do. The pandemic has actually helped with that because most people don’t see me every day.” The pandemic has provided an opportunity for everyone to cast an eye inward, both in terms of fashion, as well as in terms of identity. Mel describes their personal style as indescribable — while they lean towards certain items, they also believe that they

are figuring out how they want to look, especially in terms of their gender identity. They go on to explain that fashion does not equal gender identity- it is only used as a physical manifestation of identity, it is not identity itself. They describe this manifestation as transformative and necessary. “When I shaved my head it felt like a fresh start for me… it’s just hair but it’s not just hair. It changed my whole face, it changed my whole personality…This is the coming of age I’ve been waiting for. And I’m really excited for it. I’m looking forward to becoming the person that when I was twelve or thirteen I wanted to be.”

Fashion is used as a tool by the LGBTQ+ community in order to reach their coming of age. Young students must navigate difficulties surrounding their identities and adolescence both from others, and from internalized issues within themselves, but fashion becomes a strong defense against this. Fashion has so often been used as a barrier to try to fit people into both certain gender roles, as well as into a false gender binary. Members of the LGBTQ+ community are able to reclaim their fashion and their identity from those who seek to police it and punish them for it. This reclamation, combined with the often newfound ability to connect with other members of the LGBTQ+ community in college, is proof that fashion is a necessary factor in the coming of age of LGBTQ+ youth.

Sara-Anne is a photographer based in Chattanooga, TN. Her work utilizes “themes of surrealism, time, multiple realities, and beauty to create a juxtaposition between distress and confusion, nostalgia and memory, past and present.”

Photographer Sara-Anne Waggoner

Models Francesca Prado Briah Gober Gabrielle Lasater Tiara Macenti Writer Allison Walsh

Wardrobe Stylist Francesca Prado

HMU Artist Gabriella Bordo