Lola A. Åkerström is an award-winning writer, speaker, and photographer. She regularly contributes to high profile publications such as AFAR, the BBC, The Guardian, Lonely Planet, Travel + Leisure and National Geographic Traveller. Lola is also the editor of Slow Travel Stockholm, an online magazine dedicated to exploring Sweden’s capital city in depth, as well as an expert on all things lagom. She lives in Stockholm with her husband and two children, and blogs at www.lolaakinmade.com Publicity enquiries: Phoebe Swinburn phoebe.swinburn@headline.co.uk 020 322 6267 Marketing enquiries: Viviane Basset viviane.basset@headline.co.uk 020 322 6282 LAGOM HARDBACK 176 X 126 mm 192pp 978 1 472 24933 3 10TH AUGUST 2017 £12.99 Uncorrected sample material. Not for sale or quotation 2
NOTES FROM THE AUTHOR
SOCIAL LIFE + PLAY
Usage + Definition
WORKPLACE + BUSINESS
CULTURE + EMOTION
FOOD + FESTIVITIES
BEAUTY + FASHION
FINANCE + MONEY
SUSTAINABILITY + ENVIRONMENT
LAGOM IN A CHANGING WORLD
HEALTH + FITNESS Summary
DECOR + DESIGN 2
References Acknowledgments
INTRODUCTION + USAGE
Lagom är bäst — The right amount is best — Swedish Proverb
We’re living in times of undue pressure that demand we constantly remain plugged in and connected with the rest of the world, stay on top of breaking news by the second, and keep up with the dizzying speed of technological advancements, lifestyle changes, and new pop culture norms. We move at unnatural paces trying to keep up with others, to stay relevant, and to avoid getting metaphorically left behind. We continually feel the internal push against external pressures from our surroundings – from work, play, relationships, and society. We constantly derail off our own natural tracks in life and are sometimes forced to push our individual reset buttons. So, we disconnect, detox, and shut the world out in an effort to relax, recuperate, and rejuvenate our bodies emotionally, mentally, and physically. These solutions, no matter how revitalizing they are at the precise moments we activate them, are often temporary and ephemeral. So in our continued quest to find new ways of balancing our lives and inching closer to our happy mediums, we often look outside our boxes of comfort to draw inspiration and learn from others. What are others around the world doing well that we can emulate? What are they doing poorly that we can avoid as lessons? While the Swedish word lagom has recently emerged as a new lifestyle trend to consider adopting into everyday living, this isn’t the first time we’ve borrowed foreign words from other cultures as daily inspiration in our own lives to help centre us and get us back on our individual paths. 6
“Hakuna matata” given to us by the Swahili language means “No worries”. This perspective-giving word means we need to invite more calm into our lives by breaking out of our uptight shells. It doesn’t mean taking a carefree attitude towards every situation in our lives, but rather, stepping back with clarity to look at the bigger picture and to avoid making mountains out of mole holes in our lives. “Carpe diem” which is Latin for “Seize the day” implores us to grab opportunities as they come and take advantage of today because tomorrow may never come. The future is not guaranteed us and we should fill the day with meaningful experiences. The German word “Fernweh” denotes wanderlust and a craving for travel. The constant need to be somewhere new, different, and distant from the familiar. A pull that drags us from our mental homes of cosiness and juts us into the unfamiliar to explore it. Our Danish cousins have given us “Hygge” which, on the surface, encompasses cosiness, intimacy, and relaxation with our loved ones as well as with ourselves, but on a deeper level, denotes an emotional state of contentment and happiness at specific moments in time. Now the Swedes have loaned us the word lagom. This term is the fundamental key to unlocking the very mindset of this Nordic culture. Lagom is not just a word used in the language but the very essence of what it means to be a Swede and live like one. It is the secret that holds the explanation to the Swedish lifestyle of social consciousness, moderation, and sustainability. But like the other borrowed expressions above, how can lagom fit into our own lives and what does it aim to teach us about ourselves? Over the centuries, why have Swedes proclaimed “lagom is best” as the old proverb says? And what does lagom truly mean?
7
Defining the undefinable
Lagom (pronounced “law-gum”) has no precise definition. Rather, it is a series of explanations and loose translations that try to demystify this very Swedish word. On the surface, it is often defined as “just the right amount” and “everything in moderation” which carries with it an air of appropriateness. That air is further filtered down to mean no need for excess, exaggerations, unnecessary public displays, and unwarranted showiness. If you open up a thesaurus, other synonyms for lagom you will readily pull out include: just enough, in moderation, appropriate, the right amount, just right, sufficient, fitting, suitable, equilibrium, balance, golden mean, the happy medium, fit, apt, proper, seasonably, precise, reasonable, harmony… But lagom is so much more than our literary quest to put it into a predefined box of synonyms which mean moderation. In its most powerful form, lagom denotes as close to contextual perfection and satisfaction as we can get. While lagom doesn’t literally mean perfection which in itself is unachievable, it means the optimal solution, the most harmonious wavelength at which we can and should operate. It exemplifies a subconscious utopia where the specific choice you and I make regarding a situation, a moment, an interaction, is the perfect choice for us as individuals or for the group in which we find ourselves. If one were to boil down the true essence of lagom to its very core, it means striving for the ultimate balance in life that, when applied to all aspects of one’s existence, can help guide you towards operating at your most natural effortless state.
10
Like the heroine of British Author Robert Southey’s 1837 children’s fairy-tale, Goldilocks and The Three Bears, on her quest to find the chair, bowl of porridge, and bed that were “just right” for her. Papa Bear’s bowl of porridge was probably lagom for him. As was Mama Bear’s own bowl. We never really consider this but rather, are steered towards Goldilocks’ own perfect portion. The state and measurement of lagom means different things to different folk. My level of satisfaction may vary from your own level of satisfaction but we’re both satisfied. Lagom represents the ultimate sweet spot or golden mean in your own life and more importantly, encourages you to fully operate within that sweetness that’s just right for you.
11
C U LT U R E + E M OT I O N
Each person forges his own happiness — Swedish Proverb
Did you know Sweden has a rather telling nickname? It is called “Landet lagom (The Land of Lagom)” by Swedes themselves because lagom has fundamentally been accepted as the way of life in the country.To live like a Swede means to adopt cultural elements of lagom in various aspects of our lives. When it comes to tempering our emotions, lagom takes on the shape of moderation without extravagance. And to begin to understand the Swedish psyche is to take a closer look at the word and examine just how deeply it permeates all facets of life – from culture, fashion, and daily life, to business, relationships, and society in general.
A step back in time
But first, we need to understand how lagom was born, when it surfaced culturally, and when it began seeping into and permeating the Swedish mind. In the early 1600s, the word “lag” which means “law” in Swedish started appearing in text and its plural form at the time was “lagom”. No one can really pinpoint the exact moment lagom entered the collective Swedish consciousness but many say its roots anchored in community can be traced back to the Vikings between the 8th and 11th centuries. The word “lagom” itself has also been accepted as a shortened version of the phrase “laget om” which translates to “around the team.” 14
The most popularly-held belief surrounding the true origins of lagom is that this mindset of being a team player and taking your fair share was bestowed and passed on from generation to generation through the Vikings. It is said that communal horns filled with mead – a honey-fermented alcoholic beverage – was passed around as everyone sat around fires after a hard day’s work or pillage. Each one was supposed to sip their own share in moderation so everyone else could also get a fair gulp. I imagine a Viking not adhering to that rule of conduct met a not-soteam-like demise. This is when lagom began taking on its different personas – symbolizing moderation, not too much, not too little, just right. Sweden’s historically Lutheran Christian values have also added puritan layers over time to lagom to denote modesty, harmony, and being social keepers of our brothers and sisters by ensuring everyone is treated fairly. Historically, this strive for fairness and equality ultimately became the core thread in Sweden’s political DNA as a social welfare state where moderation, sharing of wealth by fair taxation, and equality is legislatively enforced and promoted among citizens. So, over time, what we witness today as the collective Swedish mindset is shaped by how we should exist within communities as well as how we should live our own lives in a way that doesn’t negatively impact or inconvenience others.
15
TIPS: MIND OVER MATTER
Maybe the ultimate lesson for us here is to learn how to listen more and speak less?
There are so many opportunities and details we miss when we dominate conversations and take up space. This doesn’t mean deferring to others, but rather, giving them their own space to shine as well.
Maybe we learn to respect each other more when we pause to listen to each other?
Is stating the obvious in conversations really necessary or could that time be spent talking about more meaningful things that enrich and teach?
Could the envy we feel for others stem from the fact that we see them operating closer to their ideal lagom state when we could be focusing on finding our own balance?
Maybe we should cease to operate from a mentality of scarcity and move from an emotional space where there is enough to go around?
When it comes to our emotions and feelings, we must accept and come to terms with our needs and not be ashamed of them. That will drive us closer to emotional contentment.
SWEDISH PROVERBS
The deepest well can also be drained
Each person forges his own happiness
Better an honest ‘no’ than an insincere ‘yes’
Better to be silent than speak ill
Where there is modesty, there is virtue
Over-praise is a burden
Lagom är bäst – The right amount is best
One should eat, otherwise one dies
18
19