Shutting the gate after the weekend has bolted.

Went to Bunnings last weekend. Needed a new gate for the side fence.

Measured up the gap which seemed standard so off we go, shouldn’t take long, the job will be fnished in an hour, all done by lunchtime.

In the garden section were the directions, right down the end of the megastore, which mercifully isn’t as mega as Ikea stores and equally

Pankhurst Wines

Canberra District

‘Dorothy May’

Cabernet Sauvignon

2018, $40. Dorothy it’s laid out like Adelaide, drawn up using graph paper as opposed to Ikea’s Sydney by Maurits Escher.

May cabernet has a nice ring to it even if there’s no explanation on the label. It’s a mystery like Bunnings and a forally fragrant wine, clearly well made, unlike our gate. 9.4/10.

Anyway, found the gate, in aisle 36, the last one on the rack, and began looking for hinges and a missing rubber insert thingy. After 10 minutes searching adjacent aisles without success, I went searching for an assistant which took another ten minutes and ten aisles, and was lucky enough to fnd

(Trescowthick Wines)

The Elusive Bogie Panther Strathbogie

Ranges Pinot Noir 2019, $35 That’s pretty exxy for a frivolously named wine and indeed it is also an amazingly good wine for such frivolity. Lighten up snobs, this is serious, weighty and delicious stuff. 9.4/10.

Hesketh Coonawarra two at once, chatting to one another happily. Well, it was a weekend.

They were both too young to vote and likely even drive but there was hope and after a further ten minutes using a combination of gestures, shadow puppetry and apparently archaic language the reply came as if by thumbnail dipped in tar, “we have no idea what you are looking for but you could try aisle 46”, yes, that way, at the other end of the megalopolis.

Cabernet McLaren Vale Shiraz G.A.R. (Great Australian Red) 2021, $60. About halfway from McLaren Vale to Coonawarra would be around Keith, but you’d never call a wine that. Quite a clever combination and surprisingly light at 13.5 per cent, but it feels so much bigger, and cleverer. 9.5/10.

Pondering why gates and hinges would be at opposite ends of the store proved as fruitless as the search of aisle 46, which as it turned out was a blessing in disguise as evidently gate number one was not the type we needed anyway and the correct gate for the purpose was itself in aisle 46 which made some measure of sense, even if the measurements didn’t,

Hesketh Penola Coonawarra Cabernet Sauvignon 2021, $34. It’s funny that cool climate cabernet is supposed to be more sophisticated while it’s always the higher alcohol ones that lure you back for another glass, as this one did, repeatedly. 9.4/10.

Tapanappa Piccadilly knowing the hinges were right there, well, sort of. There was only one left.

Oh well, let’s get a latch while we are here, you know those ones that wrap around the tube like a fnger when the gate bumps it?

“Huh?”

More archaic language and ASLAN failed again.

“You could try aisle 36 or aisle 10 where the other latches are”.

Valley Chardonnay, 2022, $49. This is one of the cheapest in a range of what is likely Australia’s fnest chardonnay stable, and if you’re looking for somewhere to start you’re rewarded with something not that far from the top. 9.5/10.

Tapanappa Piccadilly Valley Tiers Vineyard Chardonnay 2022,

Max Crus

Why there were two types of gate at opposite ends of the megalopoly was almost as puzzling as why latches would be in a completely different aisle altogether, but gosh, look at the time.

Oh well, that’s taken care of the weekend, let’s have a glass of wine and settle in for the evening while we google fencing and gate contractors.

$110. It is almost impossible to get the double consonants correct with this wine, but that is irrelevant, it is such a delicious chardonnay it is almost sacrilege to put it in the fridge and dull the favours even the slightest. But if you must, or if you live in the tropics. Perfect wine for a coronation. 9.7/10.