Dog droppings drop middle class in it.

There are several signs of ageing : Going to bed earlier, listening to ABC radio, people remarking how loud your radio is, buying comfortable but ugly shoes for your morning walk during which you do laudable but sometimes laughable things like picking up other people’s rubbish…and counting dog poo.

Actually, not that many people count dog poo. Even for old codgers that’s weird and not the sort of thing to which one admits. However

(Mr Riggs) Mr Brightside

Fleurieu Peninsula it provides telling insight into our neighbourhood and community.

Picpoul, 2023, $24. This little known, little grown French grape feels silly to pronounce but has a charming scent and a slight chalky appeal not unlike chenin blanc. I reckon it deserves its place ahead of pinot gris. 9.1/10.

That an otherwise law abiding (except when it comes to speeding when thinking the police aren’t watching), tax paying (except when they’re rich or think the ATO aren’t watching), charitable (except when no-one is watching), civic minded person would leave their dog’s droppings on a footpath or nature strip, just goes to show that all their law-abiding, tax paying, charitable, civic-

(Mr Riggs) Mr Brightside Adelaide Hills ‘Eurotrash’, 2021, $24. “A blend of varying European varieties”, thus aptly named, but unlike much Eurotrash, has a fair whack of alcohol to go with its alluring fragrance making it very rewarding mindedness is just a show and as soon as no-one is watching, they become hardened criminals.

At frst it appeared to be a socio-economic thing, and to some extent it is, but not as clearly cut as you may think.

Many would believe that lower socio-economic neighbourhoods would be overrepresented when it comes to dog poo, but university tests (mine) show so called middle-class neighbourhoods are the worst offenders. People who have enough money and good value. 9.4/10.

Adina Vineyard Hunter Valley La Belle Helene Semillon 2017, $30. Not sure who Helene was, a friend of Troy perhaps, but also a predictably ‘Hunteresque’ clean and remarkably fresh semillon belying its advancing

Grape Expectations by Max Crus

to buy a medium-priced designer dog but not the wherewithal, life skills, moral compass or sense of community to pick up after their Siberian-groodlehund.

Meanwhile in wealthier neighbourhoods, expectedly, it is rare to fnd unwanted poo on the footpath. Clearly they are happy to pick up two poos from their expensively manicured bichon-doubleshih’t-teser, they just draw the line at picking up a tax tab and sticking to the speed limit.

years. 9.4/10.

Adina Vineyard Hunter Valley Pinot Grigio 2021, $35. Very fashionable and uncomplicated grigio perfect for a lunch of similar adjectives. How neat and you will not fnd this lying around the streets half empty (or full). 9/10.

Pindarie Barossa Valley

Sure there are times when you can leave your dog’s doings dangling from the dandelions, and it is a simple equation : will someone step on it? Will a child pick it up and eat it? Does it mean we’re never going to win Tidy Towns ever again after our 1987 triumph if we leave it there? Sadly, it seems my immediate neighbourhood has slipped (or risen) into middle-class, and the abandoned doggie doo count has increased noticeably recently. So what’s the solution?

‘T.S.S.’ Tempranillo

Sangiovese Shiraz 2021, $26 (2022 out now).

This is like a wider family xmas, everyone brings their specialty to the table and you get that ‘superadditivity’ as an added bonus. What a delightful gift for the occasion. 9.4/10.

Maybe we could start a campaign for old people to pick up poo as well as rubbish, which would be much easier than educating someone to do it themselves and pay tax.

But sadly, poo is indicative of a wider trend. Just the other day I saw another sign of entitlement, a half-empty (or full) bottle of low-alcohol wine. Fitted right in, that stuff is sh*t. Maybe I should dump some of these around the neighbourhood to lift the tone:

Pindarie Barossa

Valley ‘Small Block’ Montepulciano 2020 (2021 out now), $32. Sounds like a small engine, little brother to the big block, and as the saying goes, good things come in small packages. Clearly Montepulciano is one of them. 9.3/10.