Wines

Grape Expectations by Max Crus

The prescience of unprecedented precedence

“The use of the word unprecedented is unprecedented”, The Big R proclaimed loudly, snickering at his cleverness and we all laughed.

Well, we would have laughed if we hadn’t all been so heartily sick of the word unprecedented and happy to never hear its utterance again, with even the use of the sharpest wit and humour insuffcient to quell the aural jar.

Perhaps we would have laughed too, if we hadn’t heard the joke already at which time we had also thought of it, but weighed up that it wasn’t that funny. A point which we immediately regretted when the person who was brave enough to voice it met with much mirth and merriment for their perspicacious pun.

Yes, the word ‘unprecedented’ has become the most frequently used in the English language, and possibly other languages too, although as I cannot speak Spanish, maybe ‘sin precedente’ is a hit too, nor French, so who knows, ‘sans precedent’ might be a thing , and has anyone heard Putin exclaim ‘беспрецедентный’?

Anyway, the problem is journalists and media generally are too lazy to get off their bums (or thumbs) and open the nearest thesaurus. Okay, perhaps they have an excuse since Google took over the world’s thesauri and the rapid decline into Americanisation began, but they could at least try, couldn’t they?

In illustration, ‘Miraculous’ is one such Google offering, which does rather reveal the religious bent of Americans and Scott Morrison who are happy for such things to the point of ignoring the meaning of the word they are synonymising in the frst place.

But how about the colourful and classic, ‘heretofore unheard of’?

How good is that?

Sure you will sound like an actor in an Emily Bronte performance, but you are guaranteed to gain attention, and who wouldn’t agree that the use of words containing ‘tofore’ are far too infrequent this millennia?

Theretofore such frequent use of the word unprecedented was, in the words of The Big R, heretofore unheard of.

Is that a tautology?

‘Uncommon’ and ‘extraordinary’ don’t really cut it, while ‘unparalleled’ does rather suggest something might be running alongside unprecedented with equal claim to the point.

‘Preternatural’ is a lovely word, but people will look at you as if you have two heads when you use it, confusing the term with supernatural or just plain, completely unnatural.

Henceforth and heretofore I am happy to move on from unprecedented, please, except that as it happens, the number of wines we reviewed this week is unprecedented, indeed could even be described as anomalous, but you try saying that after tasting 12 wines in a row.

Max Crus is a Clarence Valley-based wine writer and Grape Expectations is now in its 26th year of publication. Find out more about Max or sign up for his weekly reviews and musings by visiting maxcrus.com.au

Sandalford Swan Valley ‘1840’ Cabernet Merlot 2018, $50. (Bottle No. 0809). Very WA, very cabernet, well, what else could it be? So sensible, you could imagine school principals loving it. 9.3/10. Mount Eyre Vineyards Chardonnay 2020, $53. Solid yet sharp chardonnay, completely unsuitable for coalition cohorts. Try saying that ten times after a couple of glasses next election night. 9.4/10. Mount Eyre Vineyards Three Ponds Hunter Valley Fiano 2021, $33. Fiano is so mainstream now, no-one even jokes about Fionas any more. Faonis and foanis are still fair game however. Good characterful stuff without the burden of having to write home about it. 9.2/10. Tahbilk Ngambie Lakes Cane Cut Marsanne 2017, $25.70. There’s a few cane-cut wines out there still, so this isn’t unprecedented. However precedented isn’t really a word, so we can’t use that. Meanwhile this is lovely stuff that has just the right amount of sticky for those who don’t like a lot of sticky. 9.2/10. Tahbilk Ngambie Lakes Riesling 2021, $20.30. Tahbilk love odd prices that don’t even make sense when you take off the GST, but their riesling makes perfect sense on a summer’s day and is suitably different to mainstream offerings of the grape to make you question “Is this unprecedented”? 9.3/10. Sandalford Estate Reserve Chardonnay, 2020?? $38. Sharp without being pointy, soft without being fuffy, this is a bit of a baby bear chardonnay, just right, alas without a fairy tale ending…the bottle eventually ran out. Is there a fairy tale where it doesn’t? 9.4/10.