Kerr’s slur stirs Tory tempers after Sam spews forth following taxi chuck.

Oh, Sam, you’ve let the team downteam Australia that is, no-one gives two hoots about Chelsea.

Equally we’re not talking about what she said.

Calling someone a ‘stupid white bastard’ is hardly a jailable offence when most Australians know it’s a term of endearment, well, two thirds endearment, one third embarrassment.

Calling someone stupid

(Witches Falls/Ricca

Terra) ‘Orange you glad we did this? (Skin contact wine)’, Grenache Blanc / Zibibbo, 2023, $30. Reminds one of that annoying knock-knock joke…’orange you glad I didn’t say banana’. And you would be. And what’s wrong with a little skin contact? Or a lot. The more skin the better I say. From is a slur, and therefore endearing if you know them well enough to know they are stupid, or not, in which case it is ironic and why you should never call Americans ‘stupid’ because they won’t understand it or may vote for Donald Trump and/or have a gun and don’t understand the term ‘insurrection’.

Similarly, the word bastard is high praise whether they are or not, the obscure grenache blanc and zibibbo grapes, this is remarkably favoursome, satisfying and interesting stuff. 9.4/10.

(Witches Falls) Bird Dog

SA Rosé 2023, $19. T”A simple pleasure”, says the label, such are dogs (bird or otherwise) and wine and they go together so well. Just be careful what you throw when it comes to and generally is reserved for occasions where friends surprise us with either their good fortune or cleverness.

So Sam’s legal team have many avenues of defence should it come to that, notwithstanding that since she is unlikely to have been friends with the arresting offcer, certainly not now, none of them will work if the police invoke that they are offended by either being stupid or bastards, playing fetch. Warm rosé with enough acid for any lunchtime fare. 9.2/10.

(Witches Falls) Bird Dog SA Pinot Grigio 2023, $19. The tell-tale pink of pinot grey gets the palate ready, and it needs to be. This is a favour packed PG that leads serious wine types straight to the thesaurus and others straight back to the bottle while the fnish regardless of truth, unless as GK Chesterton observed about one’s anger at libel and satire (one because it is false and the other because it is true) given that bastards outnumber nonbastards two to one, hardly a minority, it will likely not be seen by a judge or jury as justifable cause.

Regarding someone’s whiteness as slur of either a racist or colourist nature, good luck prosecuting that is typically slightly bitter grigio. 9.1/10. when there is only one single recorded instance of anyone being offended by the term, which is Andrew Bolt, who clearly has good cause to be ashamed of his whiteness, although he’s not, and therefore insulted, which he is.

Margan Hunter Valley Verdelho 2023, $17. Verdelho can be insipid stuff, indeed that often seems its purpose, so it’s a delight to get one that has depth and character. Perfect for a well-acted SBS Viceland series, with cheese and biscuits. Go easy on the cheese. 9.2/10.

No, Sam, you should be ashamed frstly for backchatting a police offcer, something you would never do on the pitch, but more so for chundering in a taxi.

Margan Broke Fordwich

Ceres Hill (Single Vineyard) Semillon 2022, $40. NWhich came frst, long lunches or the perfect wine for them, semillon?

You can see why there’s so many long lunches in the Hunter, it’s clearly the go to (and from) place for the breed, and the more you spend the better they get. 9.5/10.

Max Crus

Disgraceful. What sort of example is that for the million kiddies who adore and emulate you.

That sort of behaviour is the exclusive domain of male footballers. You have let the team down Sam, unless it was a dodgy curry…but good luck prosecuting that.

Warning : Drink in moderation, and don’t abuse umpires or police.

Margan Broke Fordwich

Ceres Hill Single Vineyard Chardonnay 2022, $60.

Ceres Hill grows some ‘ceriously’ good grapes, and lots of them. There’s barbera, semillon, albarino and of course chardonnay and they’re all cerious stuff, as evidenced by this lemony, limey, lovable adaptation. 9.5/10.