THE VIRGINIA HOME EDUCATOR | WWW.HEAV.ORG
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THE VIRGINIA HOME EDUCATOR | SUMMER 2016
HEAV BOARD & STAFF HEAV Board of Directors Anne Miller | President | Williamsburg Patrick Ryan | Vice President | Purcellville Jennifer French | Treasurer | Williamsburg Linda Linder | Secretary | Manassas Rick Boyer | Board Member | Rustburg Cherrie Moore | Board Member | Virginia Beach Stephanie Konicki | Board Member | Midlothian Advisory Board Lauren Bell | Virginia Beach Yvonne Bunn | Murfreesboro Maureen Bittner | Winchester Kevin & Katrina Hoeft | Goochland Craig Konicki | Midlothian Al Linder | Manassas Joseph & Tiffani Miller | Newport News HEAV Staff Anne Miller | Executive Director Yvonne Bunn | Director of Homeschool Support & Government Affairs Lauren Bell | Convention Director Kevin Hoeft | Director of Development & Public Policy Helen Wright | Finance & Administration Manager Ann Miranda | Office Manager Lora Howard | Assistant Office Manager Morgan Langowski | Receptionist Angela Palomo | Transcript Editor
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Publications Team Maureen Bittner | Director of Publications & Marketing Mary Kay Smith | Magazine Editor editor@heav.org Melissa Barnes | Editor Kathleen Lansing | Advertising Director advertising@heav.org Robin Stephens | Director of Event Sponsorships Kathleen Dillie | Update Manager Karen Sweeney | Update Content Editor update @heav.org Linda Mesibov | Update Editor Arielle Potter | Copy Editor & Above-the-Fold Writer Maya Barnes | Update Layout Laurie Sitterding | Editor Michael Grice | Webmaster Alyssa Mulhearn | Web-Content Editor Mary Musick | Writer Linda Mesibov | HTML Coder Susannah Miller | Graphic Designer Amanda Schwatz | Graphic Designer Sandra Modersohn | Social Media Manager Kelly Pedone | Communications Coordinator Karen Coon | Convention Publications Coordinator Sarah Dillie | Marketing Assistance
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SEND ADDRESS CHANGES TO: Home Educators Association of Virginia, 2100 W. Laburnum Avenue, Suite 108A; Richmond, Virginia 23227; Fax: 804-278-9202; E-mail: office@heav.org; Phone: 804-278-9200; or Web: www.heav.org. For fastest service, send your former and new addresses.
DEPARTMENTS
14 Five Flavors of Homeschooling
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Sonya Shafer
Kathy Kuhl
18 The Importance of Teaching History
The purpose of the Virginia Home Educator is to provide information, resources, and encouragement to Virginia homeschool parents. The views expressed in this magazine do not necessarily reflect those of the Home Educators Association of Virginia. All Scripture quotations are from the King James Version unless otherwise noted.
Rick Boyer
20 Teaching Our Children About Disappointments
From the Editor Mary Kay Smith
6 From the Director of Homeschool Support Yvonne Bunn
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Freedom Watch
21 Classified Ads
Joy Moore
22 To Grade or Not to Grade
The Virginia Home Educator is sent quarterly to Virginia’s homeschooling families without charge. To receive a free subscription, sign up at www.heav.org. To inquire about advertising or submitting an article, please contact HEAV at PO Box 6745, Richmond, Virginia 23230-0745; or e-mail us at advertising@ heav.org or editor@heav.org. HEAV reserves the right to edit for style and space or to refuse any submission deemed inappropriate for our publication.
FEATURES 16 Homeschooling a Child Who Learns Differently
Check your mailing label to see if you are a member; if not, join today!
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Linda Lacour Hobar
2016 VIRGINIA HOMESCHOOL CONVENTION
Permission is granted to reprint any news items from this magazine, providing proper credit is given; all other material is copyrighted. For reprint permission, please contact the editor at editor@heav.org. © 2016 Home Educators Association of Virginia SUBMISSION DEADLINES: ER Fall 2016 (Issue 3)—June 15 REGIST Winter 2017 (Issue 4)—September 15 Spring 2017 (Issue 1)—December 15 G EAV.OR Summer 2017 (Issue 2)—March 15 WWW.H
AT THE!
DOOR
Alex
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THE VIRGINIA HOME EDUCATOR | SUMMER 2016
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remember when I first heard about homeschooling. I was newly married and living in San Francisco, and a new family moved into the community. They had three cute school-aged kids they carted everywhere, many times with books in tow. The children were fun-loving, well-behaved, and smart, and it wasn’t too long before our conversations led to the family’s school choice. They introduced me to Raymond and Dorothy Moore and their books Home Grown Kids and Better Late Than Early. I was hooked! The arguments for homeschooling made sense, and I loved the idea. My husband and I agreed we would do it—and I was not even pregnant. It helped that I was not at all concerned about the (at that time) unorthodox approach, as I had some unconventional schooling myself. I did most of my high school work by correspondence courses from an American university, the overstuffed airmail envelopes winging their way back and forth across the Atlantic from Africa. And then I went to college without even finishing the high school program. Alternative schooling works just fine! What fun to pour through the immensely helpful The Big Book of Home Learning by Mary Pride and make curriculum choices and place orders when we were ready to start several years later! Now, homeschoolers have co-ops, Google, chat rooms, and Face-
book to find information—and especially the HEAV convention, where you can hear speakers on every conceivable homeschool-related topic, as well as view curricula, math manipulatives, DVDs, science equipment, books, and just plain fun stuff first-hand. It just makes you want to take a huge grocery cart up and down the exhibit-hall aisles, doesn’t it? How exciting! Another year behind; a new year ahead. Blank pages, sharpened pencils, fresh ideas, new plans. I’m just as thrilled about the promises of homeschooling today as I was more than thirty years ago, and I’m sad to only have one more year with my nephew. Guess it’ll soon be time to see if my niece will let me start messing around with her little girls!
THE VIRGINIA HOME EDUCATOR | WWW.HEAV.ORG
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From the Director of Homeschool Support Yvonne Bunn
L
ong before “educational choice” became a popular cry for change, freedom-loving parents took responsibility for educating their own children instead of accepting government-controlled education. HEAV’s homeschool roots began in 1983 when Dr. Mary Kay Clark set up a card table outside a General Assembly committee room during a public hearing on home education so interested people could communicate through a newsletter. In order to be effective, parents needed a strong, unifying voice. This was the beginning of Home Educators Association of Virginia. HEAV then sent an official letter on behalf of homeschooling parents to all Virginia legislators, appealing to them to pass reasonable homeschool legislation. Their determination paid off, and the homeschool law passed in 1984. HEAV led the way for Virginia homeschoolers, and today HEAV continues to be on the forefront of educational change for Virginia homeschool families. Our mission statement, Teaching Our Children Today – Building Hope for Tomorrow, reflects the truth and optimism that is possible only through the support of dedicated and concerned families like yours.
specific bills, and had a full-time lobbyist working on your behalf. FREEDOM: Freedom and growth go hand-in-hand. Because our freedoms have grown, the number of homeschoolers in Virginia have increased to almost 40,000. We generally see a nine- to twelve-percent yearly increase in the number of children being homeschooled. Our annual convention attendance has increased to more than 13,000, with hundreds of workshops presented by nationally known speakers. Curriculum choices have exploded, covering preschool to high school and special needs to advanced learning—with many texts geared to specific learning styles.
are interested in home instruction have access to how-to-homeschool information and legal requirements through individual counseling or by checking our website. Support-group leaders come to us with local issues and school-board policies, to discuss important questions about the Virginia homeschool law and clarify how the statute applies in different family situations. HEAV provides a forum for sharing practical and encouraging information leader to leader at HEAV’s statewide leadership conference and on our dedicated leader Facebook page. From the Department of Education to local superintendent’s offices, HEAV connects with state and local education officials. We offer clarification when there is a questionable application of the homeschool law. In turn, some officials call us when they have concerns or questions. You have a voice in the media and with public officials as HEAV participates in radio, television, and newspaper interviews and sends out press releases with important homeschool information. We speak with legislators and the governor concerning homeschool issues.
ALLOWS US TO BE THE EYES, EARS, AND VOICE FOR YOUR HOMESCHOOL
WHY HAS HOMESCHOOLING CHANGED? LEGISLATION: With HEAV’s leadership—and with the support of many homeschooling families—the homeschool law has improved greatly, though we have much yet to accomplish. There is a fragile balance between the freedom we have to homeschool and the passage of intrusive laws. Some legislators are quick to let us know they support our efforts, others strongly oppose parents’ rights to teach their own children, and still others are unaware of the negative impact their proposed law changes have on homeschoolers. We know you can’t be at the General Assembly to hear the general attitude that “educators know better than parents,” that sports are a “privilege for public school students only,” or that “religiously exempt parents should be closely monitored”—but HEAV is there to stand in the gap. This year alone, your HEAV legislative team reviewed thousands of legislative proposals, tracked thirty-three 6
Without your financial support through memberships and donations, HEAV would never be able to reach out to the thousands of parents who are searching for an educational alternative. Home instruction is the only true educational choice offering parent-controlled education. Parents can now choose the curriculum that works best for their child instead of using one-size-fits-all public school curricula. Parents can choose the type of evaluation that best measures their child’s progress instead of teaching to the required SOL tests. Parents can work one-on-one to educate their child for success instead of the child receiving group instruction. We have these freedoms because you have worked together with HEAV to strengthen homeschooling. HOW HAS THIS HAPPENED IN THE SHORT SPAN OF THIRTY YEARS? HEAV has its finger on the pulse of home education in Virginia. We work for you each and every day. Hundreds of anxious, concerned parents call our office each month, and we communicate with individual homeschoolers on a daily basis, listening to questions, hearing concerns, and working to meet parents’ home-education needs. Parents who
THE VIRGINIA HOME EDUCATOR | SUMMER 2016
HOW CAN WE WORK TOGETHER TO STRENGTHEN YOUR HOMESCHOOL FREEDOMS AND ENCOURAGE EVEN GREATER HOMESCHOOL SUCCESS? HEAV works hard to make it easy for us to stay connected through our website, magazine, legislative updates, Facebook pages, and weekly on-line newsletters. We want you to know immediately about potential threats to your homeschool freedom. While HEAV supports ALL homeschoolers—members as well as non-members—your membership allows us to provide services and continue to be the eyes, ears, and voice for your homeschool. We must remain vigilant to guard our homeschooling freedoms. For just $35 per year, you can help us monitor and guard Virginia’s homeschooling rights as well as help others learn about this successful educational alternative. Call our office or go to http://heav.org/joinrenew/ heav-member-benefits to join or renew and see the many additional benefits of being an HEAV member and supporter! We can’t do what we do alone—join us!
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HEAV: WATCHING AND WORKING FOR HOMESCHOOLERS Education was a major topic during this legislative session, and “innovation” was the trigger word for the change that is coming. How some of these changes could affect homeschoolers remains to be seen, but from the proposals and discussions, HEAV is aware that some legislative trends could make a difference in homeschooling as well as change the opportunities homeschool students have for higher education and job training. HEAV’s on-site lobbyist, Ann Hoopsick, heard numerous unnerving committee discussions. One heated debate centered on a law that would allow parents to opt out their high school student from reading what was considered a pornographic book. One legislator stated that the “professionals” should make educational decisions because only they—not parents—know what good education is. Some outspoken legislators (and former teachers) did not want parental involvement at any level. Our legislative team kept a careful eye on many educational bills that passed and, thankfully, some bills that failed—including multiple attempts to implement mandatory early childhood education. Legislation to fund the development of certifications and credentialing
through community colleges was discussed as the newest “innovation” in education. Early in the session, HEAV took initiative on several threats to homeschool freedoms. Our face-to-face meetings with legislators at the General Assembly resulted in the successful passage of legislation protecting the rights of homeschool parents in the following important ways: protecting the right of parents to make immunization decisions for their children; protecting parent-taught classroom and behind-the-wheel driver training from elimination; and protecting the right of parents to allow release of homeschool information in a public forum, such as a school board meeting, if the parent chooses to have a public discussion. See all the legislative outcomes below. LEGISLATIVE OUTCOMES Sports Access HB131 (Bell, R-Albemarle) and SB 612 (Garrett, R-Buckingham) These two companion bills state that no public school can be a member of an organization that does not allow qualified homeschoolers to participate in sports and other interscholastic activities, e.g., the Virginia High School League. The legislation passed both the House and Senate for the second year in a row and then was vetoed for the second time by Governor McAuliffe. FAILED Parental Choice Education Savings Accounts HB 389 (LaRock, R-Loudoun) This bill allows qualified public school students to move state funds into a savings account. The funds will be restricted for payment to a private school, sectarian or nonsectarian school, or preschool. Passed then VETOED BY THE GOVERNOR. FAILED. Dual-Enrollment Tuition HB 30 (Bell, R-Albemarle) This budget amendment requires the Department of Education, in collaboration with the Virginia Community College System, to ensure that the policy for dual-enrollment tuition payments shall be the same for public school students and homeschooled students. PASSED.
Certification of Online Driver Education Courses HB 748 (Greason, R-Loudoun) This bill changes the Virginia Code to allow online driver education courses to be provided only by driver-training schools that administer behind-the-wheel exams. The patron failed to realize the impact on homeschoolers. HEAV requested an exemption to protect parent-taught classroom instruction and parent-taught behind-thewheel training. PASSED Removal of Exemptions for Immunizations HB 1342 (Stolle, R-VA Beach, Filler-Corn, D-Springfield) This proposed bill removed language that has historically given parents and guardians the opportunity to make decisions concerning immunizations. It removed a parent’s right to claim a religious exemption as well as the right to present a medical professional’s statement. Phone calls and e-mails got the attention of the patron and committee members. THE PATRON REQUESTED THAT THE HEALTH, WELFARE, AND INSTITUTIONS COMMITTEE STRIKE THE BILL. Teacher Tax Credits SB 151 (Reeves, R-Fredericksburg) As proposed, teachers, instructors, counselors, principals, or aides would receive a state tax credit equal to $500 for materials used in teaching. HEAV requested removal of the reference to “900 hours” and asked that teacher tax credits apply to all teachers, including homeschooling parents. The bill’s sponsor would not consider either change, stating there is no funding for the bill as it is. FAILED Consent to Disclose Information SB 780 (Black, R-Loudoun) This technical amendment improves last year’s HEAV-initiated law prohibiting the release of homeschool information that could be included in longitudinal databases. Parents may now consent to release homeschool information for public discussion in school board meetings. PASSED
THE VIRGINIA HOME EDUCATOR | WWW.HEAV.ORG
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John & Julie’s story: College student
Members for three years
Freedom to choose own provider
Chest pain
Go to: mysamaritanstory.org
John & Julie “When I had my need, I talked to a gentleman who was able to answer all my questions and even prayed for me on the phone.”
For more than twenty years, Samaritan Ministries’ members have been sharing one another’s medical needs, without using health insurance, through a Biblical model of community among believers. Samaritan members share directly with each other and do not share in abortions and other unbiblical practices. Come see what our members are saying and start your own Samaritan story today at: mysamaritanstory.org
Biblical community applied to health care 10
THE VIRGINIA HOME EDUCATOR
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• More than 60,000 families (over 196,000 individuals)* • Sharing over $17 million* in medical needs each month • The monthly share has never exceeded $405 for a family of any size* samaritanministries.org 888.268.4377 facebook.com/samaritanministries twitter.com/samaritanmin
SUMMER 2016 * As of April 2016
33RD ANNUAL VIRGINIA HOMESCHOOL CONVENTION
n
JUNE 9, 10 & 11
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RICHMOND CONVENTION CENTER
REGISTER
AT THE
DOOR!
WWW.HEAV.ORG
Alex Kendrick Heidi St. John
Mike Farris
Shaun Alexander
Joel Salatin
Kirk Martin
BRING THE WHOLE FAMILY—THERE’S SOMETHING FOR EVERYONE. HIGH SCHOOL WRITING Presented by humorous and engaging founder of WriteAtHome, Brian Wasko, the “High School Essay Clinic” provides excellent information and hands-on experience for high school students! $29/student. CONSTITUTIONAL LITERACY WITH MIKE FARRIS FREE for convention attendees! Come to this three-hour crash course designed to teach the original meaning behind the Constitution—and how it differs from today’s interpretations. EXPANDED COLLEGE FAIR More than 30 colleges will be on hand Friday and Saturday to answer June 10 & 11, 2016 your questions about admissions, financial aid, scholarships, campus life, and more!
Expanded
FREE! SHUTTLE BUS End your parking woes! There will be a FREE shuttle bus service all three days of the convention. Park your car—free of charge—at the Diamond stadium and ride the shuttle right to the convention! Buses run all day. CAMP INFINITY ROBOTICS TEEN PROGRAM Science and technology meet ROBOTICS Truth in this one-of-a-kind camp CAMP that combines STEM education with creation apologetics training!
DON’T SWALLOW THE PIZZA WHOLE! Writing can be fun? Well, if not fun, at least… done! This piece-by-piece approach to writing by Matthew Stephens of Essentials in Writing shows middle schoolers that writing doesn’t have to be painful. $19/student. HANDS-ON SCIENCE! Hissing cockroaches, anyone? Stop by Sciexperience’s booth for an upclose look at these incredible critters! BUY IT HERE! See it here. Buy it here. Keep ‘em here! Support the exhibitors by purchasing in the Exhibit Hall when you can. Plus, for every $25 you spend onsite, you’ll be entered in a $100 drawing. There will be one drawing EACH day of the convention!
FREE! First-time parents of just preschoolers can attend the whole convention free of charge. FREE! “How-to-Begin Homeschooling” workshops on Thursday afternoon from 1 p.m. to 5 p.m. are open to anyone! Free exhibit hall shopping afterwards (5-8 p.m.). No need to pre-register; just come to the door. SCHOLARSHIPS ARE ALWAYS AVAILABLE Please don’t let a sincere financial need keep you from the convention! If you, or someone you know, need a partial or full scholarship, submit a request online www.heav.org/scholarship), give us a call (804-278-9200), or bring a written request with you to the convention. We want to bless your family.
BRING A FAMILY!
YOU can make a difference! Hundreds of distressed parents seek help for their child who struggles with learning disabilities, bullying, cultural shifts—and more. These famFREE BOOK GIVEAWAY! ilies need to know that there is hope, that A copy of “Rush Revere: Time-Travel Adventures with Exceptional Americans,” will be given they have options, and that HEAV is here to away to all attendees at a keynote session, comhelp. Please let your friends, church groups, pliments of Rush and Kathryn Limbaugh! MOPs groups, and online communities know ALL-NEW CHILDREN’S PROGRAM about the convention. Let your children experience “All the Children Resources are available of the World,” with live animals on stage during special presentations by Wild Earth Encounters! at www.heav.org THE VIRGINIA HOME EDUCATOR | WWW.HEAV.ORG 11
SCHEDULE-AT-A-GLANCE
This is a tentative schedule subject to change.
Room
FREE BEGINNER SESSIONS
Ballroom Building
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WORKSHOPS ROOMS E-11 A/B/C 1 pm – 2 pm Homeschool High School Joy Moore 2:30 pm – 3:30 pm Preparing for College Joy Moore 4 pm – 5 pm How to Ace the “New” SAT Jean Burk ROOMS E-21 B/C Noon – 2 pm High School Writing Brian Wasko 3 pm – 5 pm Shark Dissection Sherri Seligson ROOMS E-23 A/B Noon – 2 pm Don’t Swallow the Pizza Whole (A Piece-byPiece Approach to Writing) Matthew Stephens 3 pm – 5 pm Understanding Art Basics/ A Strong Foundation Sharon Jeffus ROOM B-22 1 pm – 5 pm Photography Workshop James Staddon
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MUSIC COMPETITION ROOM B-15 A & C Competition 1:30 pm – 5:30 pm Presentation of Awards 6:30 pm
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EXHIBIT HALL HOURS THURSDAY 5 pm – 8 pm FRIDAY 9:30 am – 8 pm SATURDAY 9:30 am – 6:30 pm FREE SHOPPING SATURDAY 3:30 am – 6:30 pm
Exhibitor Workshops
Friday Session 1 10:30 – 11:30 am The Five Flavors of Homeschooling ~ Sonya Shafer Why You Need to Teach Geology… and How to Do It ~ Patrick Nurre
B-15 A
Ballroom Building
B-15 B
Director’s Breakdown Script to Edit ~ Chad Burns
B-15 C
When Bible History & World History Meet Face to Face
Ballroom Building
Ballroom Building
Matthew Stephens
Friday Session 2 1:30 – 2:30 pm
Heidi St. John
Friday Session 3 3:00 – 4:00 pm
Easy Ways to Incorporate Literature Analysis into Your Language Arts Program ~ Matthew Stephens
Overview of Components That Are Needed for a Balanced Language Arts Program ~ Matthew Stephens
Marine Biology & What the Oceans Have to Say About Evolution
Why Teaching Science Is a Critical Part of Education (Even for Poets)
Sherri Seligson
Sherri Seligson
Lessons From the Valley
Buttons, Beans, and Coins: Making Math Come Alive ~ Sonya Shafer
Sonya Shafer
Seven Renaissance Artists Everyone Ought to Know
To Grade or Not to Grade:A Practical Workshop on How,When,&Why to Keep Grades in Homeschool ~ Linda Hobar
Linda Lacour Hobar
Linda Lacour Hobar
B-11
Multi-Age and Multi-Subject,All Together,Without Mom Losing Her Mind ~ Biblioplan for Families
Classical Conversations
College Prep in K5? The Practicality of College Preparation
Bryan College
How to Teach the American Founding
Ballroom Building
Virginia Baptist College
B-12
Teaching Lifelong Entrepreneurship
Ballroom Building
World News Group
B-13
I Hate Math, But I Want My Kids To Love It ~ RightStart Math!
Experience Excellence in Writing
Ballroom Building
Institute for Excellence in Writing
Parentalrights.org
B-14
Understanding Your Artistic Child
Do Not Eat The Bread of Idleness
Math from a Biblical Worldview?
Ballroom Building
Creating a Masterpiece
The Bread Beckers
Master Books
B-16
Veritas Press
B-17
Introducing Essentials inWriting (Writing Curriculum on DVD) ~ Essentials in Writing
B-18
Margaret Sanger’s Nemesis:Anthony Comstock ~ Family Vision Resources
Ballroom Building
Ballroom Building Ballroom Building
The Best College Plan Often Starts as Early as Middle School Age
B-19
Ballroom Building
Your College Planning Coach
Knowing Who You Are and How to Get There
B-20
Ballroom Building
B-21 A/B/C
Ballroom Building
E-10 A
Exhibit Hall Building
E-10 B
Exhibit Hall Building
E-10 C/D
Exhibit Hall Building
E-11 A/B
Exhibit Hall Building
James Glenn
KEYNOTE A B-21 A/B/C Ballroom Building
Music Competition Winner
Keynote: Train Up! Shaun Alexander
The Father’s Big Four Shaun Alexander
Help Parents of Struggling Learners Munday, Olbris, Kuhl, & Westscott
Preschool Science:Encouraging a Lifetime of OrderlyThinking ~ Lesli Richards Constitutional Literacy 1: Limitations on Government Power ~ Mike Farris Stop the Yelling, Lecturing and Power Struggles ~ Kirk Martin
E-11 C
Exhibit Hall Building
E-21 A/B
College Panel Discussion
E-21 C
The Digital Dulling of Our Children
Exhibit Hall Building
Exhibit Hall Building
E-23 A/B
Dr. Carol Reynolds
Critter Study
Exhibit Hall Building
Dr. Lainna Callentine
E-24 A/B
Evaluating Student Writing
Exhibit Hall Building
Brian Wasko
E-25 A
The Truth About Wheat
Exhibit Hall Building
Sue Becker
E-25 B
Homeschooling Math Without a Plan? You’ve Got to be Kidding! ~ Tom Clark
Teen Track E-22 A
Camp Infinity Robotics Teen Program 10:30 am – 4:00 pm
Exhibit Hall Building
Heritage Foundation
Leadership Luncheon at the Marriott ~ Katrina Hoeft
ROOMS E-10 A-D 1 pm – 2 pm Introduction to Homeschooling Yvonne Bunn 2:30 pm – 3:30 pm How to Begin: What You Really Need to Know Yvonne Bunn 4 pm – 5 pm Know the Law: Notifying and Testing Demystified Yvonne Bunn
B-10
Friday Keynote A 8:30 – 10:00 am
11:30 am – 1:30 pm LUNCH
Thursday, June 9 1:00 – 5:00 pm
Brian Wasko
Parental Rights at a Tipping Point
College Preparation & the Homeschooled Student ~ Regent University Getting to the Heart of It All BJU Press
Making Men with Chests:Why Christians Should Read the Classics ~ Memoria Press
Benefits of a Strong Focus on American History ~ GeoMatters
“The Early Years Without Tears
X and Y Got Nothin’ on Me: Algebra Like a Boss ~ Ruth Cooper
Have You Ever Dreamed of Owning a Family Business Built on Biblical Principles? ~ Office Pride
“What Do You Think You Think?”: Critical Reasoning & Thinking Skills
Understanding the Homeschool Law, Educational Trends, and Your Rights ~ Yvonne Bunn
James Glenn
Ready-Made Preschool
Constitutional Literacy 2: Religious Constitutional Literacy 3: Judicial Liberty & Parental Rights ~ Mike Farris Activism & Cultural Destruction ~ Farris Teens,Technology, and the Truth Jean Burk
Encouraging Your Child Kathy Kuhl
Family Fiefdoms Joel Salatin
Hypergraphia Genius: Good Notes, Good Grades ~ Jean Burk The Classical Preschooler: Building a Foundation of Wonder ~ Lesli Richards Ten Threads of Success for Starting a Farm ~ Joel Salatin
Discipline That Works: Get Your Kids Celebrate ADHD & Special Needs: to Listen the First Time ~ Kirk Martin How to Motivate Your Child Without Crushing His Spirit ~ Kirk Martin Vocal Master Class
Piano Master Class
Liberty School of Music
Liberty School of Music
How to Fit Your Size-16 Day into a Size 10 ~ Heidi St. John
Better for Best: Keeping Christ as the Center of Your Home ~ Heidi St. John
Why College Freshmen Fail: A Teaching Your Children the Story of Professor’s Perspective ~ Dr. Reynolds Christian Music ~ Dr. Reynolds Adapting Instruction – Modifications & Accommodations ~ Judi Munday
Mountain Building: Geological Apologetics ~ Patrick Nurre
Character Lessons from World War II
Teaching Mathematics with Art
Rick Boyer
Tom Clark
Transitions: Childhood to Designed for Purpose: Help Your Adolescence to Adulthood ~ Joy Moore Children Discover God’s Call ~ Joy Moore Understanding Learning-Related Vision Problems ~ Dr. Kenneth Westcott
Learning Accommodations
Camp Infinity Robotics Teen Program 10:30 am – 4:00 pm
Camp Infinity Robotics Teen Program 10:30 am – 4:00 pm
Dr. Kenneth Westcott
SHARON JEFFUS
Joy Moore
Friday Keynote B 4:30 – 6:00 pm Exhibitor Workshops
Dr. Kenneth westcott
Dr. Lainna Callentine
Room
Saturday Keynote C 8:30 – 10:00 am
Sherri Seligson
Saturday Session 4 10:30 – 11:30 am
B-10
Producing a Film from Concept to Completion ~ Chad Burns
B-15 A
How to Identify Those Rocks Your Kids Are Bringing Home ~ Patrick Nurre
B-15 B
The Apprentice: Getting High School Credit for Internships ~ Sherri Seligson
B-15 C
Unleashing the Power of World History
Ballroom Building
Linda Lacour Hobar
Ballroom Building
B-11
Ballroom Building
Ballroom Building
Ballroom Building
11:30 am – 1:30 pm LUNCH
Linda Lacour KIRK Hobar MARTIN
Dr. Carol Reynolds
Saturday Session 6 3:00 – 4:00 pm
Charlotte Mason and Her Methods Sonya Shafer
Laying Down the Rails:The Power of Good Habits in Your Homeschool ~ Sonya Shafer
Beyond the Books:Take-Away Thoughts for Heading Home ~ Linda Lacour Hobar
Creation Geology:The Key to Unraveling Earth History ~ Patrick Nurre
Homeschooling & Homemaking: From Mis-organization to Miss Organization!
When You Have a Child Who Is Not Driven
Sherri Seligson
Sherri Seligson
Brian Wasko
How to Do Literary Analysis That Doesn’t Ruin The Book ~ Brian Wasko
How to Build Lifelong Learners With Math-U-See ~ Demme Learning
Setting Your Children Up for Success
Breathing Life Into Language Arts
Foreign Language For Kids By Kids
Total Language Plus
Starting Your Own Homeschool Business 101 ~ World News Group
The Fundamental Right to Food: Whose Choice Is It? ~ VICFA
Heritage Foundation
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Why Are ADHD, Learning Disabilities, & Autism Spiking? ~ Brain Balance of Richmond
Teaching with Tapestry of Grace
Walking With Jesus
Tapestry Of Grace
Daughters of Decision
How Audio-Visual Processing Dysfunctions Affect Learning,Autism, and Behaviors ~ Moore Auditory Integration
How To Achieve Success in Photography ~ Lenspiration
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Cultivating Men of Integrity
Ballroom Building
Alert Academy
B-16
Picture This
Religious Liberty, Common Core and the Threats to Homeschooling in Virginia ~ The Family Foundation
B-17
Keep It Simple: How to Teach Your Whole Family Together ~ Simply Charlotte Mason
TheThree College P’s:Preparation & Planning with Purpose ~ Paideia Academy Tutoring
What is HSLDA Online Academy?
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Why Aren’t You Earning College Credit in High School? ~ Liberty University Online Another Way to Look at Learning Difficulties: How to Unlock the ‘Smart’ in Your Child ~ Learning RX
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Money and Your Children
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AE Money Quests
Preparation of the Future – The Art of Learning ~ Accelerated Christian Education
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Personal Awareness & Self-Protection
Teaching Art at Home
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Mark Langowski
Sharon Jeffus
B-20
ADHD & Vision: Unlocking the Mystery
E-10 A
KEYNOTE C B-21 A/B/C Ballroom Building
Music
Gospel Fluency ~ Shaun Alexander PASTORS ONLY – Will This Be the Last Generation That Knows True Religious Freedom? ~ Michael Farris
Exhibit Hall Building
Competition Winner
E-10 B
Keynote: Transforming Our Families & Our Nation
Helping Teens Overcome Learning Challenges ~ Kathy Kuhl
Michael Farris
Jean Burk
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E-10 C/D
Keynote: Courageous Fatherhood
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Alex Kendrick
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Limited Language, Limited Mind
E-11 A/B
Messy Marriage Stuff: Ten Things Your Spouse Desperately Wants You to Know ~ Kirk Martin
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E-11 C
My Kids Hate School! Setting Them Free with Passion-Driven Learning ~ Marilyn Boyer
E-21 A/B
The Distracted Mom (iMom)
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Heidi St. John
E-21 C
A Year of Playing Skillfully: Getting Organized for Young Learners ~ Lesli Richards
Exhibit Hall Building
E-23 A/B
The Battle That Wages Within: Our Immune System & Its Endless Combat on Microbiological Enemies ~ Dr. Callentine
Exhibit Hall Building
E-24 A/B
Unlocking Reluctant Writers
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Matthew Stephens
E-25 A
Hospitality
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Sue Becker
E-25 B
Scholarships
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Teen Track E-22 A
3:30 pm – 5:30 pm Class of 2016 Graduation Ceremony
Ballroom Building
HSLDA Online Academy
Dr. Kenneth Westcott
Single Parents’ Luncheon in the Hilton Hotel Restaurant – 11:30 am – 2:00 pm
Yvonne Bunn
Saturday Session 5 1:30 – 2:30 pm
How to Teach the American Founding
B-21 A/B/C
Competition Winner
Sue Becker
B-12
Ballroom Building
Legislative Update
JAMES R. GLENN
Great Books for Regular Students
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Music
Kathy Kuhl
Ballroom Building Ballroom Building
KEYNOTE B B-21 A/B/C Ballroom Building
Joel Salatin
Amazing America – How to Make Your Kids Love History ~ Rick Boyer
Our First 30 Years of Homeschooling: Lessons Learned from Three Decades of Teaching 14 Kids ~ Rick & Marilyn Boyer
When Handwriting & Spelling Don’t Come Easily ~ Kathy Kuhl
When Math Doesn’t Come Easily
The 12 Most Important Soft Skills to Teach Your Children ~ Jean Burk
Freeze Your Teenagers Until They’re 23
Ten Ways to Stop Defiance, Disrespect & Meltdowns ~ Kirk Martin
Wild Earth Encounters
Beauty over Decadence: Winning the Battle Against Pop Culture
Developing Unit Studies: A Hands-On Approach to Learning
Kathy Kuhl Jean Burk
Dr. Carol Reynolds
Dr. Lainna Callentine
Biblical Discernment in an Unbiblical Age ~ Heidi St. John
The Secret in the Sunset
Equipping Your Child for a Focused Future James Glenn
Critical Skills Your Child Needs to Be Successful ~ James Glenn
The Power of a Blessing
Intentional Parenting
Joy Moore
Joy Moore
Slaying the Giant of Selfishness
Fathers: Building Relationships Through Effective Communication ~ Matthew Stephens
Marilyn Boyer
Heidi St. John
What’s Making It So Hard for My Child to Make Progress? ~ Judi Munday
Not By Bread Alone
Lorraine Santa Lucia
Is Math Straining Your Relationship with Your Children? ~ Tom Clark
Simplifying Algebra for the Hesitant Learner (“When Are We Going to Need This Stuff Anyway?”) ~ Tom Clark
Camp Infinity Robotics Teen Program 10:30 am – 4:00 pm
Camp Infinity Robotics Teen Program 10:30 am – 4:00 pm
Camp Infinity Robotics Teen Program 10:30 am – 4:00 pm
Sue Becker
HOMESCHOOLING SONYA SHAFER
SPEAKER!
D
on’t you love to look through recipe websites? I just found a great recipe app for my computer. Now any time I see a recipe I like, I can click and drag it into that app, and it magically transfers all the information to my collection of recipes. That’s the easy part. The hard part is looking through page after page of mouth-watering photographs and recipes and deciding what to serve my family. You know, the more I talk to homeschoolers around the country, the more I’m convinced that the world of homeschooling is a lot like the world of food. There are so many possibilities for what educational food can look and taste like, it can get overwhelming. Let’s simplify the options. THE FIVE FLAVORS In the food world, there are many different flavors—Italian, Mexican, Chinese, or American dishes, to name a few. In homeschooling there are also many “flavors.” You might prefer traditional, classical, Charlotte Mason, unit studies, or unschooling. What’s the difference? Here’s a quick overview. TRADITIONAL HOMESCHOOLING is probably similar to what you grew up with in the classroom. It usually involves textbooks and workbooks for various subjects. You read the assigned chapter in the textbook and answer questions about the content. Usually the workbooks contain fillin-the-blank and multiple-choice questions. 14
CLASSICAL is another flavor. Classical homeschooling is based on teaching children in three stages, called the Trivium. The Grammar Stage (ages six to ten) focuses on absorbing information and memorizing the rules of phonics, spelling, grammar, foreign language, history, science, math,
etc. The Dialectic Stage (ages ten to twelve) emphasizes logical discussion, debate, drawing correct conclusions, algebra, thesis writing, and determining the whys behind the information. The Rhetoric Stage (ages thirteen to eighteen) continues the systematic, rigorous studies and seeks to develop a clear, forceful, persuasive use of language. CHARLOTTE MASON is the third
THE VIRGINIA HOME EDUCATOR | SUMMER 2016
type. This approach to homeschooling uses rich literature and “living books” rather than textbooks. Charlotte was a British educator in the late 1800s and early 1900s who emphasized respecting each child as a person and giving him a broad education. This flavor of homeschooling includes nature study, art and music appreciation, and handicrafts, as well as the usual academic subjects. It seeks to “spread a feast” before the child and let him digest what is appropriate for him at the time. And it uses methods that will nurture a love for learning and reinforce good lifelong habits; it does not just present a body of information. UNIT STUDIES, the fourth option, takes a theme or topic and incorporates all the school subjects into that topic. For example, when you study Ancient Egypt, you read books about Egypt (history), make a salt dough map of Egypt (geography), determine how to calculate the height of a pyramid (math), explore how Egyptians irrigated their farmland from the Nile (science), read a historical fiction book set in Ancient Egypt (literature), build sugar cube pyramids (art), and learn how to spell “pyramid” (language arts). UNSCHOOLING can go by many names, but it basically follows the interests of the child. There is no set curriculum. If a child is interested in butterflies, you research and learn about them until the child is satisfied. If he develops an interest in race cars, you give him information on race cars.
PLANNING THE MENU Do any of those flavor descriptions whet your appetite? Just as you can find restaurants and stores that cater to each food cuisine, you will find publishers that cater to each flavor of homeschooling. And those publishers will be gathered at your annual homeschool convention. Think of the convention as a “Taste-of-Homeschooling” event. You will be able to learn more about each flavor of homeschooling and take a closer look at different publishers’ materials. Shopping for curriculum and materials is a lot like shopping for a meal. You can buy a ready-made meal to go, like pizza. Some publishers offer that: all subjects in a grade are packaged for you—sort of like third grade in a box. The publisher gives you everything to do for that child for that year. Ready-made schoolin-a-box is convenient but not customized. An alternative to ready-made is shopping for different components of your meal. Instead of getting a pizza to go, you might shop around for ingredients for a crust, sauce, and toppings to make your own customized pizza. It’s the same with homeschool materials. You have freedom to choose components from various publishers and put them all together. It’s not as con-
venient as school-in-a-box and might take more time to plan or prepare, but you can customize for each child. MAKING ADJUSTMENTS Whatever flavor you choose, make sure it is one that you enjoy and works well for your family during this season of life. The key is to teach the child, not just teach the curriculum. Feel free to tweak the spices in the sauce or change the toppings you use as you go along. One of the great things about homeschooling is the freedom you have to make changes as needed. If you’re not enjoying something or discover that it’s not your child’s taste, make adjustments. Swap out an ingredient. Trying a different flavor might seem a bit scary at first, but give it some time and gain a little experience, and you will settle into your favorite flavor of homeschooling. Soon you will find that you are navigating the homeschool world with ease. Sonya Shafer will be giving several workshops about the Charlotte Mason approach at the HEAV convention. If you’re interested in this flavor of homeschooling, she would love to help you learn more about it at the convention, or you can go to www.simplycharlottemason.com.
tory s i H Is Fun! for Homeschool Families at Jamestown Settlement & Yorktown Victory Center September 10-25, 2016
Families will become immersed in hands-on history at these two museums that tell the story of America’s beginnings. Touch reproduction artifacts. Explore re-created living-history areas. Interact with costumed historical interpreters and learn all about Jamestown, America’s first permanent English settlement and the American Revolution.
Visit... www.historyisfun.org/learn/homeschool-scouts/ homeschool-program/, or contact Group Reservations at (757) 253-4939 or group.reservations@jyf.virginia.gov to find out more about these exciting opportunities.
www.historyisfun.org
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THE VIRGINIA HOME EDUCATOR | WWW.HEAV.ORG
15
SPEAKER!
WHO LEARNS DIFFERENTLY KATHY KUHL
O
ften parents ask me about starting to homeschool. Here’s what I’d say to anyone starting out:
DON’T PANIC You’ve always been responsible for your children’s education— you just outsourced it to a school. Now you’ll do lots of it yourself. You might still outsource some, though, to fellow homeschoolers in a co-op, to tutors, or to community classes. Think of yourself as facilitating your children’s education, not necessarily teaching every subject—especially as they grow older. (We outsourced Spanish, biology, chemistry, driver’s ed, and one math class.) You’ll need to educate yourself about home education. The HEAV website hosts several of my favorite introductory videos that help build a great foundation for homeschooling. Also, don’t forget the workshops for beginning homeschoolers offered the first day of the HEAV homeschool convention. Feeling intimidated? Here’s a way to think about this change to your child’s education and your life. Imagine you’d never done laundry before but, instead, had dropped everything off at the cleaners. Washing clothes at home might sound tough: learning how to use a washer and dryer; keeping up with the sorting, folding, and ironing; and keeping track of what needs special handling. “What a hassle!” you might think. But there are more choices in each part of the process when you do it at home, just as there are with homeschooling. You can avoid that detergent (or curriculum) your child is allergic to, you can keep closer track of what clothes (relationships or subject) need mending, and you have more control over getting the exact care for each piece (child). With homeschooling, you are the one who determines what your
child is studying. You can pay more attention to his particular needs and preferences as well as your own. Want to take a field day to go rock climbing, visit a political rally, take a hike, or hear a symphony? Do it! IDENTIFY YOUR GOALS If your children face learning challenges, don’t come in expecting to “fix them” in a year. Set a few goals. When you set goals, consider emotional, moral, and practical goals, not just academic goals. Academic: Understand what’s hard for your children, and find alternative ways to teach. A special-education consultant can help you understand test results and show you how to work around problems and strengthen areas of weakness. Books can help you understand different learning challenges and how to cope with them. Emotional: If your child has become discouraged by school or thinks he or she is stupid, aim to restore a love of learning. Build on his or her passions. Moral: As they struggle with discouragement, many of our kids don’t recognize how important character is. What traits do you want to encourage? Practical: What life skills will you nurture this year? Whether it’s washing hands or washing laundry, setting the table or setting a budget, your child has lots to learn. Some of our kids need more detailed, explicit, and repeated instruction in these skills.
WE TEND TO FOCUS ON THE PROBLEMS, BUT OUR CHILDREN’S SUCCESSES AS ADULTS WILL LIKELY GROW OUT OF THEIR STRENGTHS.
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THE VIRGINIA HOME EDUCATOR | SUMMER 2016
BUILD ON THEIR STRENGTHS Whether our kids have learning difficulties, are gifted, or both, we tend to focus on the problems. But their successes as adults will likely grow out of their strengths. Build your homeschool around those. Watch them and ponder, “What are they good at? What do
they enjoy?” Look for ways to build your homeschool around their passions and abilities. For example, my son has a phenomenal memory for story and loves history, so we built on those.
riculum options, and connect with other homeschoolers, you can build on his strengths and create success. Though it is more work, homeschooling can be much more satisfying to everyone.
SHOP AROUND FOR CURRICULUM The question prospective homeschoolers ask me most often is, “What curriculum shall I use?” Some of us wish for an easy answer, like “Buy Super-Amazing-Brand Homeschool Curricula, and just follow the directions.” But if school wasn’t working for your child, you may need to use curriculum from a variety of publishers and adapt them. It is work to put together, but it is not as hard as it sounds. To see the selection of curricula available, I strongly recommend going to a homeschool convention, even if you aren’t sure you want to homeschool. With your goals in mind, browse catalogs and the Web, and read up on the different curricula ahead of time. Then hit the convention floor to see and handle materials for yourself. Many people working at booths have used or written what they sell; they can talk to you about it. As you shop, notice that each curriculum has assumptions behind it. For example, some writers create curriculum to go with a particular teaching style, such as Charlotte Mason, unit study, or classical. Decide which style is for you.
Kathy Kuhl, author of Homeschooling Your Struggling Learner and other books, is speaking at the HEAV convention in June. She reviews books, speaks internationally, and gives private consultations. Visit her at LearnDifferently.com.
CONNECT WITH OTHER HOMESCHOOLERS Get in touch with other homeschoolers online and in person. Both kinds of connections have advantages, as I described in an earlier article. (“Finding Support When You Homeschool a Child with Special Needs,” The Virginia Home Educator, vol. 19, issue 2, p. 14.)
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PLAN YOUR TIME AND SPACE Make a plan for your year, quarter, week, and day. Write in pencil or on a computer, because you will change it. I kept a copy of our weekly schedule posted on a whiteboard. Set up the physical space where you will homeschool. You may not have a designated room, but your child will benefit from a seat that lets his feet reach the floor and a setting that doesn’t distract the distractible child. But also remember this: when you homeschool, the world is your classroom. Get out and enjoy it! So, if you have a child who learns differently, homeschooling is a great answer. Once you identify your goals, check out the cur-
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17
TEACHING
HISTORY RICK BOYER
SPEAKER!
I
was chatting one day with a teenage boy who worked for me, and somehow the conversation turned to the subject of history. Young Sam didn’t see the point of it. “Why,” he reasoned, “should I care about things that happened before I was even born?” Personally, I believe that history is the most important academic subject we teach our children. It matters far more than most people think. The events of the past made the world we live in. Today, things are happening that will determine what will happen tomorrow. “Now” is the meeting place of “eternity past” and “eternity future,” and it is not possible to separate the three time periods. They are siblings—in fact, conjoined triplets. Why do your children need to know history?
HISTORY PROVIDES VICARIOUS LIFE EXPERIENCE History is a great source of experience at somebody else’s expense. Thomas Fuller, English churchman and historian, said, “History maketh a young man to be old…privileging him with the experience of age, without either the infirmities or inconveniences thereof.” Kids can learn positive lessons from Thomas Edison who, for the most part, educated himself and became the world’s most prolific inventor. Or they can take warning from General Custer, whose excessive pride led to his death and the deaths of his entire troop at Little Big Horn. There is no need to make all the mistakes in the world if you’re willing to learn from the mistakes of others from the past. Sometimes individuals, families, and nations can avoid disaster by learning what caused disasters in time gone by. As journalist Norman Cousins said, “History is a vast early warning system.” We should all hope that the phenomenon of Adolph Hitler is never forgotten, lest whole nations again be deceived by a charismatic leader and the Holocaust repeated. Those who say it could never happen again have not read deeply in history. Hitler was not the first tyrant.
THE MOST IMPORTANT REASON FOR IMMERSING OUR KIDS IN AMERICAN HISTORY IS THAT THEY ARE RESPONSIBLE FOR MAKING IT.
HISTORY PROVIDES A SOURCE FOR CHARACTER TRAINING History is a tremendous source of character training. Do your children whine? Do they think life is tough because they have to clean their rooms and mow the grass? Do they not appreciate the comfort in which they live every day? Maybe it’s because they’re only comparing their situation with some friend whose life seems easier. Tell them about George Rogers Clark, and let them compare their challenges with his: During the Revolutionary War, Major Clark led his unpaid, undersupplied militiamen on a 180-mile trek across what is now Illinois to take the fort at Vincennes from “Hair-buyer Hamilton,” a British officer who paid the Indians in gold for American scalps. They made the secret expedition in February, across icy, rain-flooded prairies. Day after day they marched—hungry, wet, freezing, exhausted, and sometimes unable to find a dry hill on which to camp at night. When they finally arrived at the last river between them and the fort, they found its icy floodwaters spread out for five miles. By the time they waded across, carrying their sick in canoes, some of them were so far gone they collapsed while still partly in the water. 18
THE VIRGINIA HOME EDUCATOR | SUMMER 2016
HISTORY REMINDS US OF THE TRUTH As Americans, we should value the study of history more than any other people. Why? Because our history is something special. Our country is the first republic established by Christians and intentionally built on biblical principles. That is what has made America the leading nation of the free world for most of our history. America has recently been portrayed as greedy, selfish, tyrannical, and unjust. We’re also told that our Founders were Deists, agnostics, and atheists who were motivated only by greed and self-interest. If you believe that myth, it’s because you’ve only read modern history books rather than the diaries of men such as Franklin, Madison, and Adams. If you haven’t read the Declaration of Independence for yourself, you may not know that the founders believed that the rights of men
come from “their Creator” rather than from government. When Benjamin Franklin stood up in the Constitutional Convention to suggest daily prayer in that body, he referenced Scripture at least half a dozen times in that brief speech. If a sparrow cannot fall without the notice of God, he asked, how can an empire rise without His aid? Franklin was among the less religious of our founding fathers, so that should tell us something about our heritage. The vast majority of the men who made America in the extraordinary years of the late 1700’s were godly or at least God-fearing. That’s why our laws reflect the Ten Commandments. That’s why the freedom of religion is dealt with in the very first Amendment in the Bill of Rights. It’s only because we don’t understand the godly roots of American government that it was ever possible for modern Supreme Courts to twist the Constitution as they have. If the Court of 1961-62 were correct in saying that prayer in school is unconstitutional, why didn’t the very men who wrote the Constitution know it? Why was it okay to pray in school for nearly two hundred years under the Constitution? People who know our history demand answers to such questions. Roe vs. Wade (1973) could not have happened a hundred years earlier. Justices would have been impeached over such a travesty. Why? Because in 1873, Americans knew their history and clung to our early values. But after a hundred years of educational malpractice, most of us just believe what our leaders tell us and just go along to get along. TOMORROW’S HISTORY IS MADE FROM TODAY’S DECISIONS The most important reason, I think, for immersing our kids in American history is that they are responsible for making it. What
your children and mine do with their lives will have a part in shaping the events that are recorded by the historians of tomorrow. If we fail to learn and to teach them the lessons of the past, godless social engineers will determine America’s course. If our kids don’t rise to leadership and reverse that course, another few decades will find the United States of America looking like Europe, with more families dissolved and churches abandoned—haunted by the outraged spirits of ideals that once glowed throughout the land. In 1630, Governor Winthrop stood on the windswept deck of the Arbella and delivered a bold sermon to the hardy souls who would soon establish Massachusetts Bay Colony. Without even knowing it, he laid a great proposition before generations of Americans to come: “…Consider that we shall be as a City upon a Hill, the eyes of all people are upon us; so that if we shall deal falsely with our God in this work we have undertaken and so cause Him to withdraw His present help from us, we shall be made a story and a byword through the world, we shall open the mouths of enemies to speak evil of the ways of God… Beloved, there is now set before us life and good, death and evil in that we are commanded this day to love the Lord our God… Therefore let us choose life that we and our seed may live by obeying His voice and cleaving to Him, for He is our life and our prosperity.” Rick Boyer is a speaker/author who tackles the challenges of parenting head-on, offering practical, effective solutions based on Scripture and more than forty years of parenting experience. He and his wife, Marilyn, also wrote the Bible-based Character Concepts curriculum.
THE VIRGINIA HOME EDUCATOR | WWW.HEAV.ORG
19
TEACHING OUR CHILDREN ABOUT
Disappointments
JOY MOORE
SPEAKER!
L
ife doesn’t always go the way we plan, and everyone experiences disappointment, but how we deal with it can impact our families. Here are some ways to be a positive role model.
restoration or change the outcome. When kids blame others, encourage them to take the responsibility that is theirs and then to trust God to handle the rest.
GRIEVE, DON’T EXPLODE Disappointment is defined as “the feeling of sadness or displeasure caused by the non-fulfillment of one’s hopes or expectations.” We think of grieving when someone dies, but grief is processing loss in any area of life. If you feel angry, privately find time to cry, pray, yell, journal, or whatever you do to process. Be honest about the loss, and allow yourself time to grieve. When children face disappointments and are angry or emotional, give them time and a safe, secluded place to deal with their emotions. Take time to listen to their concerns, worries, and fears.
OWN, DON’T DEFINE Sometimes we are the cause of our own deep disappointments and failures, or at least it seems that way. Ask God what you could’ve done differently, and accept responsibility. But also be willing to accept “Nothing” as His answer. Sometimes God asks us to do something that doesn’t turn out the way we expected. Know that God has a plan, even if it looks like the plan failed. His ways are not our ways. Our disappointments and failures do not define who we are. Maybe we failed, but we are not failures or disappointments. We need to speak these words to ourselves and to our children when they have failures and disappointments. We are loved by a God who offers us mercy and forgiveness.
WE CAN’T LET DISAPPOINTMENT DISCONNECT US FROM OUR DESTINY.
WAIT, DON’T JUDGE One reaction to disappointment is to judge its purpose. Why would this happen? What is God doing? But, you’ve heard it said that hindsight is 20/20, and it works that way with disappointments, too. When kids question the purpose of disappointments, explain that they may understand more in the future, but whether or not they receive answers, they can continue to trust that God’s plan is the best. ASK, DON’T ASSUME Before we can truly process a disappointment, it is important to ask ourselves what exactly is causing us to feel disappointed. Is it because the particular situation we wanted didn’t happen or maybe won’t ever happen? Is it because of what we believe people will think about us? Is it because we believe the disappointment affects our future personally, financially, or professionally? Ask God for His truth and His perspective about your concerns. When children experience disappointment, it’s important to find out why they are disappointed and then to speak truth to them about their current situation. TRUST, DON’T BLAME The Blame Game is the oldest game in the world. Adam and Eve invented it, and it seems that every child is born knowing the rules: “I didn’t do it! She did!” It’s easy to blame a spouse, a child, a friend, or an organization, but even when blame is deserved or can be assigned, it isn’t beneficial. Casting blame doesn’t bring 20
THE VIRGINIA HOME EDUCATOR | SUMMER 2016
USE IT, DON’T LOSE IT One of my young adult daughters who experienced great disappointment in the past year shared this idea. She realized she could lose the chance to grow in faith or use disappointment to trust God more. MOVE ON, DON’T STAY A disappointment is really only one part of one chapter of our lives. Instead of focusing on the past, we need to focus on the future God has in store for us. We can’t let disappointment disconnect us from our destiny. In our home, we aren’t allowed to say “I should have.” I learned this from my mom who experienced incredible disappointment and recognized its destroying powers. She taught me to hold on to this promise: “And we know that all things work together for good to those who love God, to those who are the called according to His purpose.” (Romans 8:28, NKJV) Joy Moore is the wife of Harold, and is a twenty-year homeschool veteran who has taught their four daughters from kindergarten through high school. She is the author of the popular Lady Day: Letters to a Daughter About Becoming a Woman and regularly shares her experiences through workshops on parenting and homeschooling and at www.Daughters4God.com.
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LINDA LACOUR HOBAR
SPEAKER!
T
o grade or not to grade? While answers will vary, depending on whether a family is relaxed or highly structured, all families can benefit from developing a philosophy toward grade keeping that grows with them over the years. Simply put, if you grade a little or grade a lot, grades can help you manage, measure, and motivate your students when properly handled. Here are a few thoughts for establishing your philosophy on keeping grades. MANAGE To properly manage students with grades, let’s start with a biblical worldview of authority. In God’s grand scheme of the universe, there exists hierarchy, order, and a chain of command. Our children are our responsibility to lead, train, and teach (Deuteronomy 6:6-7). While this may seem obvious, the right to homeschool and manage your children’s grades will always be threatened by those who don’t hold to a biblical worldview or agree on the value of home education. So, value the right to use grades when and if you desire, and manage them with integrity and in accordance with your state standards. MEASURE To properly measure students with grades, consider what is age-appropriate. For example, there is little need to use grades to measure learning with younger students (K-3rd grade) because parents are so highly involved in the teaching process. Sitting side by side with a little one, you know what they’re learning. What younger students need most is acknowledgment, which can be offered through hugs, praise, and stickers—or whatever reward is needed! Middle students (4th-8th grade) are a dif22
ferent story. Once a child is able to read and final GPA doesn’t define the worth of that write, the parent is usually less involved in student or of you, but that doesn’t mean we the teaching process. For this reason, grades can’t use grades along the way to help us find for independent work on a few subjects can problems. Poor grades might alert us to anxbe valuable in determining what students are iety issues, special needs, or the unfortunate learning without assistance. Quizzes, tests, reality that we’re not doing our job well. and homework grades— written or oral—can tell GRADES CAN HELP YOU you what the student realMANAGE, MEASURE, AND ly understands or doesn’t MOTIVATE YOUR STUDENTS. understand and what needs more attention. Generally speaking, Second, another way grades may fail us is this age group still needs praise and acknowl- the fact that “good” grades won’t inspire all edgment, but additionally needs pushing personality types. Grades may mean more to in some areas and pulling in others. Grades highly driven overachievers and less to creative can be especially useful to leverage hard work free spirits who have other things on their from students who are prone to test authority. minds. So, when considering whether or not Older students (high school) come with a you will keep a few grades or a lot of grades new set of issues because most homeschool on your students, consider their God-given parents are “required” to count high school personalities. When grades don’t matter, be credits with grades. The path to success with creative with self-paced courses, pass/fail this age group is developing a clear purpose options, credit for mentoring positions, and for their education (determining if a student work-grade contracts (i.e., earn grades based is college bound, heading into the work force, on work rather than final test scores). or starting a family); establishing a plan to In summary, homeschool families will vary reach that purpose (learning subjects at home on how, when, and why they keep grades. or taking outside classes); and creating ac- However, all families can benefit from forcountability (deciding who grades the work, mulating a philosophy of grading that evolves keeps the records, and creates a transcript). with the needs of the family. In proper With a purpose, plan, and accountability, you context, grades can help most of us manage, can use grades to document the fulfillment of measure, and motivate our students. credits and measure academic success as you move your student to the next station in life. Linda Lacour Hobar, author of The Mystery of History (www.TheMysteryofHistory.com), is MOTIVATE a follower of Christ, a genuine people-person, To properly motivate students by using and a fan of comfortable high-heels. Formerly grades, we should first agree that grades a missionary, she graduated from Baylor Unimight fail us in one of two ways. First, be- versity, where she first fell in love with world cause of stress, learning disabilities, or a lack history. Join her at the HEAV convention to of test-taking skills, quiz and test grades learn more about grade keeping. don’t always reflect true learning. A student’s
THE VIRGINIA HOME EDUCATOR | SUMMER 2016
An Academic Home as
Strong as Their First
Josh, Edward and Sarah call their transition to Regent University ”seamless” and its values “a natural fit.” These former homeschooled students grew up in environments that encouraged academic challenge from a Christian foundation. Today, they’re experiencing this and more, thanks to Regent’s high-quality degree options, honors program, and expert professors who also serve as mentors. Ready to join our family? Learn about our homeschool-friendly admissions policies and tuition discounts for HSLDA members. Associate | Bachelor’s | Master’s | Doctoral ON CAMPUS & ONLINE Top 7% Most Affordable Undergraduate Christian Colleges - CCCU Survey, 2015
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