I Believe that I Cannot Believe

By Rev. Tim Pauls

I was born on April 5, 1967. Having spent the past nine months before conceiving myself in my mother’s womb, I decided the time had come: I delivered myself into the world.

Yeah. Right.

I was born just like everybody—I was there, that’s all. My mom went through labor, the doctor stood ready with the net, and my dad…did whatever dads did back then. I wasn’t there to do anything; I was there to be done to.

Remember that: I was given life and born. I didn’t bear myself. I couldn’t will myself into being; that’s solely God’s work. However, the Lord did work through means to get me here. He didn’t just snap His fingers and—zap!—there I was. He used my parents to create that peculiar genetic casserole known as me. Pop quiz time: 1. Did you do anything to be born? 2. Did you come into being apart from means? Answers: no and no. You did nothing to be born, and you didn’t just appear out of nowhere. The Lord used means to create you (parents, pods, whatever—I’m not one to judge). Most people get these two questions right when it comes to being born.

But a lot of people get it wrong when it comes to salvation. There’s a big chunk of Christianity that says that you decide to follow Jesus. In other words, you choose to be saved.

In John 3, Nicodemus visits Jesus under the cover of darkness (the original Nick-at-Night!). Jesus tells him, “Most assuredly, I say to you, unless one is born again, he cannot see the kingdom of God” (Jn. 3:3). Huh? Born again? Nicodemus says, “How can I enter into my mother’s womb a second time?” which, I hasten to add, would not thrill his mother either. See his mistake? He’s looking to do something to be born. So Jesus patiently tells him not to do something, but to be done to—to be born of water and the Spirit. He’s talking Baptism. The Holy Spirit works through water and the Word to beget children of God.

Now, what did you do to be baptized? The answer is especially clear if you were a baby at the time: nothing. You might have been sleeping or causing a stink (in more ways than one), but you didn’t do anything. It was done to you, for you.

Did God just zap you with grace? No. He worked through means— water connected with God’s Word. Read all about it in the fourth chief part of Luther’s Small Catechism.

Speaking of which, look how the explanation to the Third Article of the Creed begins: “I believe that I cannot…believe in Jesus Christ.” That’s your statement of faith: you believe that you cannot believe by your own reason or strength. You cannot believe by your thoughts or efforts. You believe that you cannot believe in Jesus. BUT! “But the Holy Ghost has called me by the Gospel, enlightened me with His gifts, sanctified and kept me in the true faith,” continues the Catechism. You don’t believe by your own reason or strength. You believe by the work of the Spirit. You were born again and you have life in Christ by the Spirit’s work. It’s His doing, not yours, and this is really good news. What if it were up to your reason and strength? How smart would you have to be before God saved you? How much good would you have do before He adopted you? If you’re saved by your own reason or strength, you could never be sure you’ve gotten reasonable enough or strong enough. (And if your reason and strength play a part, you’re also saying that the Spirit doesn’t get the job done by Himself. To say, “I’ve chosen to follow Jesus” is to insult Him!) But if faith is the work of the Spirit, then you can be sure you’re saved. He doesn’t give partial grace or half-faith; He gives it all as His gift to you, for Jesus’ sake.

So it’s good news that the Holy Spirit is doing the work so that you’re born again and alive in Christ. Here’s more—you say exactly how He’s at work in the Third Article’s explanation: “by the Gospel.” In Baptism, He joins you to Jesus’ death and resurrection (Rom. 6:3-4). By the Word, He creates and sustains faith (Rom. 10:17). By the Lord’s Supper, He strengthens and preserves you in the one true faith unto life everlasting (Mt. 26:28). He’s working there for sure.These are the places He has promised to be for your good and for your salvation.

I mention this because many will say, “But Jesus says in John 3:8 that the Spirit moves where and when He wishes!” That’s absolutely true, but this doesn’t mean you can pinpoint Him working in bizarre places like a pine tree or a toasted cheese sandwich. What’s true is this: the Spirit moves where and when He wishes but He also tells you exactly where you can always find Him working for your good: in the means of grace. He doesn’t play hide and seek. In Word and Sacrament, He declares, “Here I am.”There He is for our good.

There He is, at work in Word and Sacrament, giving you faith to believe and keeping you in the faith and thus you believe what you can’t believe. You believe what God gives. You believe in Jesus. This is also His work, keeping you alive in Christ. There ought to be a word for it like faithing or enfaithening or fidelitizing. Actually, there’s a better word already: sanctifying. To sanctify is to make holy. The Holy Spirit sanctifies you with forgiveness. If your sins are gone, so is your unbelief; therefore, you have faith. And where there is forgiveness of sins, there is also life and salvation (Small Catechism, VI:3).

Rev. Tim Pauls is associate pastor and acting school administrator of Good Shepherd Lutheran Church and School in Boise, Idaho and on the editorial board of Higher Things. You can email him at tpauls@goodshepherdboise.org.