Reaching Out to Differently Abled Peers

By Deaconess Sarah Gaffney

Yo! ‘Sup? Hello! Catch someone’s eye, the wave, the nod, the fist bump…getting someone to look at you, acknowledge your presence. Hello.

It’s simple yet so important.

What if we don’t say hello? Why is that?? Doesn’t it send a message when we don’t say hello? We’ve all been the one who someone didn’t acknowledge—at least once—and it can be painful.

While we live in a time when personal interaction is decreasing (which is ironic because there is more “communication” going on than ever via social media) there is a population that is regularly ignored more than others: people with disabilities. And it takes place in all sorts of places… school, church, etc.

How often have you walked right by that person at school…you know, the one who goes to class in that special room? He might look different from you. She might communicate strangely. Maybe he doesn’t say much at all. How frequently have you put your head down or looked the other way, so as to not initiate conversation? I mean it’s uncomfortable sometimes, right? Maybe we don’t speak because we’re afraid we’ll say the wrong thing.

People with disabilities are just that: people. They don’t wake up one day and decide to acquire a disability. They don’t spend a long day at the mall picking out the perfect disability. The reality is this: disability happens. And when you have one, life can be a challenge. Did you choose to have blue eyes or brown ones? Did you choose to be short or tall? Did you opt to be stocky or rail thin? Of course not. You are how God made you. You are who you are. It is the same with your differently abled peers.

We aren’t the only people to avoid interaction or even have negative feelings toward the disabled. Luke 18:35-42 reads: “As [Jesus] drew near to Jericho, a blind man was sitting by the roadside begging. And hearing a crowd going by, he inquired what this meant. They told him, ‘Jesus of Nazareth is passing by.’ And he cried out, ‘Jesus, Son of David, have mercy on me!’ And those who were in front rebuked him, telling him to be silent. But he cried out all the more, ‘Son of David, have mercy on me!’ And Jesus stopped and commanded him to be brought to him. And when he came near, he asked him, ‘What do you want me to do for you?’ He said, Lord, let me recover my sight.’ And Jesus said to him, ‘Recover your sight; your faith has made you well.’” We see in this passage that Christ has great compassion and reaches out to needy people—people who society has cast aside.

From Bible times until modern day, people with disabilities have been relegated to the lowest positions in society. It is only very recently that we see the popular tide turning for such folks, especially in the United States where there are actual laws protecting them. Such laws ultimately do not change hearts, however.

So why might it be a struggle just to say hello to a differently abled person? Sometimes what makes us uncomfortable with a person is that they are different from us. It might help to look at the similarities: everyone desires friendships, everyone hopes to be successful, everyone wants that boy/girlfriend to attend the dance with them, regardless of whether they have a disability or not. If you get to know someone you might discover they have gifts and skills, too. You might even find they share some of the same interests as you.

What we ultimately have in common is that we are all made by God, in His image. Psalm 139:14 acknowledges this, “I praise you for I am fearfully and wonderfully made. Wonderful are your works; my soul knows it very well.” Ephesians 2:10 reiterates this truth, “For we are his workmanship, created in Christ Jesus, for good works.”

Even deeper than that, your “hello” or other conversation starter might connect you with another baptized child of God or with someone who desperately needs Jesus. Your differently abled acquaintance is your neighbor—it’s as simple as that. Because you are forgiven in Christ, you are free to love your neighbor with Christ’s love. That Good News, for you and for me, is what changes hearts.

I minister through Voice of Care, an organization that helps congregations reach out to this often-ignored population and include them. Visit voiceofcare.org and download the free disability awareness kit. Pass that kit on to your youth group leader. Those materials will help you learn to understand what someone with a disability may be experiencing. Voice of Care can also help you learn what it looks like to be inclusive of people with disabilities and host Bible studies that are appropriate for all, regardless of ability.

As a deaconess, I care for people with disabilities since it is a part of mercy work, but you don’t have to be a church worker to reach out. It all can begin with a hello.

Deaconess Sarah Gaffney is a teacher at St. Paul Lutheran School in Brookfield, Illinois. She is also a ministry facilitator with Voice of Care. She addressed this topic in a breakout session at the Sanctified 2018 conference in Kansas.