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ABSTRACT CITY
I LEGO NY
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When she suddenly awoke, we had to beg At times I have needed support from those around me. A few years back I was her not to remove her left hand and right watching a Knicks game with a friend. By knee from under that pillow. strategically switching salsas late in the third quarter we had managed to engineer a turnaround. The Knicks were up by two as regulation time was winding down. Meanwhile, my pal’s girlfriend had fallen asleep on the sofa in an awkward position. Obviously there was a direct correlation between her posture and Marcus Camby’s remarkable free throw percentage.
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ABSTRACT CITY
To save a close game, I have often had to sit through an entire quarter with my tongue stuck in a beer bottle. However, with all those commercial breaks, a quarter can easily last forty-five minutes. When you are almighty, you have a very tight schedule. Consequently I had to end my NBA career in 2001, to focus on other responsibilities. Look at what has happened to the Knicks since.
MASTER OF THE UNIVERSE
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Speaking of breakfast, why does this guy begrudge me that last bit of marmalade?
Even more annoying is that our dishwasher is always—always!— already full or not yet emptied.
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ABSTRACT CITY
Whenever I have to jot down a phone number, the writing tool I find on my desk will be: a) dried up. b) of some useless color. c) utterly disfigured, because the other day I used it to open a shrinkwrapped package, which I know was not a good idea, but I couldn’t find those darned scissors.
All the while, the one operational pen is hiding in some ridiculous spot. Joined by the scissors, for all I know.
HAUNTED HOUSEHOLD
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