5 minute read
Defining success on your own terms
Shannah Kennedy discusses how to decide what success looks like for you…
WEALTH? An expensive car? Your own business? Buying a home? Growing your own food? Having a close friends and an interesting social life? Travelling the world? Having time for creativity and hobbies? What does success mean to you?
This is a wonderful and simple, yet very powerful, question to ask ourselves before we plan, set goals, build habits, and work on our thoughts.
Each of us has a different and unique answer to this question. Depending on how you were raised, your ideals around money, wealth, the life experiences you have had and your own unique personality, you will have a different measurement of success than the person next to you. We can take a look around us and find many ways to measure success as well as thousands of articles and advice on how to be more successful, such as:
n how you position yourself on the career ladder, n how to achieve a profitable portfolio, n how to get better abs, n how to be a great podcaster, and on and on.
There is no shortage of advice, but, how you define success for yourself is one of the most empowering exercises we can do for our one and only true self.
Defining what success means to you, taking the time to think about it, write about it, and refine it allows you to control the controllable, focus in on what matters to you and your life, and build your own personal calm confidence. Without doing this, we tend to do live someone else’s dream or pursue another’s view of success, leaving us feeling a little empty and often leading to frustration, stress and burnout.
To live a truly successful life, perhaps we need to steer away from being a, “rushing achievement junkie” and move to a more meaningful and fulfilling life that you have created and constructed for yourself. Now, what is meaningful to you? For me, success is living the life I choose and adding value to the world—one conversation at a time. I work to educate and empower my clients, so they can have and experience personal clarity, purpose, and direction in their lives. I express creativity in my daily life through having a mindful mindset and approaching my days with lightness and joy, rather than overwhelm and anxiety, which I have trained my brain to do over the years. I live by and for my values and work on showing up each day as the best version of myself (which of course doesn’t happen all the time but that is the goal and the direction). I choose to be kind to myself and embrace the pace and progression, rather than perfection, and the list goes on.
So, do your current measures of success assist you in having more intimate connections with people in your life and greater fulfilment within your days, or are your measures keeping you from experiencing success on a daily basis?
Many people measure success with negative terminology, such as needing to be a certain weight in order to be happy, rather than focusing on being the healthiest version of themselves, or they strive for that certain dream car, banking their happiness on driving and owning it at the cost of all the other amazing things that are happening in their lives. Happiness is an inside job, and the science of happiness shows us that 10% of happiness is based on external factors, such as money, cars, clothing, online shopping, etc. A few weeks later that external object doesn’t give us the same feeling of success. About 40% of our happiness comes from intentional activity, such as our habits, routines, and rituals that we can control daily. Maybe we could add in some of those in our success measurements. For example, measuring success for me is asking myself whether I consciously took three breaths each time I washed my hands that day as that keeps me grounded, calms my nerves, recenters me, and also keeps my overwhelm at bay. This is more important than gaining more clients because if I don’t do the breathing, I will feel burnt out and be no good to anyone.
Vision boards are also amazing vehicles to imagine, visualise, and raise your energy toward success. My definitions of success are on there, how I want to feel is on there, some small external rewards are on there, but primarily my mindset is on there—what I am telling myself for today. Today is a gift, control the controllable, focus on being mindful and present, be impeccable with your words, do your best each day, and just go for it.
So, remember to ask yourself: What is your definition of success? How do you want to feel? Where do you want to be? What do you want in your life on a daily basis so that you can tap into the feeling of success each and every day?
What you imagine and define is what you create, and you can’t achieve it if you can’t see it. Having a picture of our own definition of success is an essential step in having your own personal life plan. The journey miles begins with a vision and a clear understanding of what success means to you, so you can plot, build habits, routines, and rituals to support you on the way to reaching your goals. And, don’t forget to celebrate all the small wins along the way.
Take some time out for yourself. You owe it to yourself, to sit and reflect, and connect with your true self. Simply follow these steps:
Write down your values and what is most important to you. Write down what your goals are. Plot out some dates and times to give the brain a roadmap, your life plan! Write down how you want to feel each and every day. Write down the daily habits that will enable you to feel successful on your life journey
We plan in decades, think in years, work in months, and live in days. To live today, mindfully and gracefully, while controlling the controllable, we need to have a clear life plan, a healthy definition of success, and some solid daily habits that support us in showing up as the best version of ourselves. n
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SHANNAH KENNEDY is
one of Australia’s foremost
strategic executive life and health coaches, working to transform her clients’ careers, well-being and lives. She is a bestselling
author, well-being specialist, keynote speaker, workshop facilitator, media contributor, and a wife and mother of
two. Visit shannahkennedy.com for free resources, information, and to make
inquiries for Shannah’s coaching packages
and public and corporate programs.
