2 minute read
On Running For President
Ziploc bags, found a way to travel to the moon, convince 3000 people to be stuffed on a ship sailing to Mexico for bad food and drinks while paying thousands of dollars for the privilege and developed meat that doesn’t need to be refrigerated so you would think they could take the simple step of spaying and neutering their pet to reduce the population; then there will be enough room, love and resources for all of my compadres!
Japanese Chin friend, Yakimoto.
Edwina: What's your biggest pet peeve?
Henrietta: First of all, the phrase “pet peeve” seems a bit harsh doesn’t it? But I guess I would have to say the archaic ordinance that dogs are not allowed in restaurants. Do they think we smell or something?
Edwina: What is the first thing you would do as President?
Henrietta: I would call Felicity Fancy Pants and gloat. Next, I would make Pig Skins the national snack, install a “watering hole” in the West Wing and put a 5 MPH speed limit on squirrels.
Edwina: What would you outlaw?
Henrietta: After serious consideration to outlawing cats, I recognize that would violate the very freedoms of our country that I am valiantly working to uphold; so, I would take this one step further for the benefit of Felines by outlawing the declawing of cats. It’s much more of a sport for us to catch them when it’s a fair fight.
Edwina: So basically you are saying you could be the first woman President? You actually think you could handle all those men hounding you in a debate?
Having said that, I must also say that I love globalization and I’ve learned much from my worldly friends. The best kiss I ever had was from a French Poodle named Jaques, I learned to listen to my inner self from a Tibetan Terrier (and my inner self told me it would like more chicken), and my love for sushi would never have been realized without my
Henrietta: My life experience has taught me to never put down my gun to hug a grizzly bear. I would use this same rule of life when dealing with ALL pawliticians. It looks like my opponent would be between one person whose goal in life is to have a mental disorder named after him and another who'd likely be stuck in a corn maze during the entire campaign season so I think my odds are good.
Edwina: So what is your campaign slogan going to be?
Henrietta: Who Do You Want For President, The One Who TAKES A Poop or The One Who PICKS It Up?
Offering designer canine accessories that are imported from countries all over the world and throughout the United States, including an exclusive collection of dog spa products that are free of genetically modified organisms and harsh chemicals. Other products include swarovski crystal collars, pet jewelry, designer style dog carriers, high-end clothing and more; all while donating a portion of the sales revenues to dog rescues in Katy and the Greater Houston area.
We offer high-quality third wave coffees, teas, specialty beers, wine, pastries, charcuterie (Italian Salumi) boards and other sharable options. Enjoy a snack while your furry friends indulge in tasty treats from the upscale dog “PUCCI Barkery”. The 2,000 square foot back features live music right on the LaCenterra Lake, as well as a fenced Bark Park for the puppies.
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