familylife 2012 guide to parenting... from bringing baby home to choosing a school
WELCOME TO PARENTHOOD
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ELCOME to the wonderful world of parenthood! Your new role as mum or dad is set to last a lifetime as you watch your precious new bundle grow up into adulthood. A new arrival is sure to turn anyone’s world upside down and you will need help and guidance in getting used to your new role. A new baby is bound to bring new challenges into your life and questions
every step of the way. This Family Life supplement is full of useful tips and advice on how to meet the demands of parenthood, from preparing the nursery to healthy eating. You’ll also be introduced to our featured family who tell us all about how the birth of their baby has changed their lives for the better. We meet young Jacob who today marks the milestone of being six-months-old since his birth at Huddersfield Royal Infirmary in October.
Bringing home the new member of your family
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T’S that time, the day has dawned and you are about to bring home your new baby. Everything is ready. The nursery is freshly decorated and you have everything to hand to make your new arrival feel at home.
As proud parents, there’s nothing more exciting than bring your bundle of joy home from hospital for the first time. But often, parents-to-be are so swept up with the anticipation of the birth that they forget to look beyond the big event so those first few days at home with your new arrival can be a bit of a shock to the system. One minute you're on cloud nine, cooing over your bundle of joy – the next, you're down to earth with a bump, getting used to a new routine and surviving on a few hours' sleep. It's exciting and exhausting all right, getting to know your son or daughter and learning how to care for their every need, but these early days can be made a little easier with some forward planning. A few weeks before your due date, (presuming junior arrives on time!), stock up on groceries and make lots of meals which you can freeze. Then when you come home, you don't have to worry about slaving over a hot stove. Try and get the cleaning out of the way before you bring baby home – hey, maybe that's a job for dads to do in between hospital visits? Then you can relax in the knowledge that you are bringing your newborn into a nice, clean environment. You could even rope some well-wishing relatives into ensuring your pad is spick and span. This leaves you free to enjoy a 'babymoon,' taking time out to snuggle up and bond as a new family without chores getting in the way. And even though they may be knocking your door down, visitors should be kept to a minimum or you will be bombarded with hoards of family and friends eager to catch a glimpse of the new arrival. Explain to people that you just need a little time together and to adjust to your new role as parents – they will understand. Then when you feel ready, invite them round in your own time. And don’t be afraid to put them to good use! When visitors do pop round, don’t feel obliged to cater for
BRINGING BABY HOME
them or make endless cups of tea – ask them to put the kettle on and make snacks for you, or even wash a few dishes – most people won’t mind. They will be glad to help and remember what it was like to be a new parent. It takes a good few weeks for a family to settle into a routine, learning to share responsibilities, as well as getting used to a change in sleeping patterns. One thing people always advise new parents to do is to take time to rest during the day. They say – when baby sleeps, you should sleep – which is good in theory, but in reality, it’s easier said than done when there's a mountain of pots in the sink or you've run out of clean clothes. But try to heed their advice and take the opportunity to enjoy a ■ BABY: He or she will soon settle in and you’ll feel as if your new arrival has always been with you little catnap whenever you can. Before baby takes up residence in your abode, there will be a certain amount of things you need to buy – from a car seat to a cot – which can be very costly. But there's no need to rush out and buy everything on the baby books' 'what to buy' lists. There are some essential purchases which you need to make before junior's arrival, such as a car seat for transporting your newborn from hospital, but with some items it might be better to wait and find out if you really need them before splashing out. For example, will you be breast or bottle feeding? The beauty of breastfeeding is that, there is no equipment necessary to feed your little one – although a breast feeding pillow can be useful. If you decide to bottle feed, however, you will need to invest in a steriliser (steam or electric), as well as around six bottles with teats and lids, a bottle brush to ensure the bottles are really clean, and a tin of formula milk. Moses baskets are a popular choice of bed for babies as they are lightweight, can be easily moved around the house and can be placed alongside the parents' bed. However, it's not worth spending the earth on one, as babies grow out of them so quickly and before you know it, they will be ready for a cot. If you're strapped for cash, you will find many bargains in charity shops and car boot sales, which are as good as new. However, if you buy a Moses basket or cot second hand, it's a good idea to buy a new mattress.
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CREATING A NURSERY
A special place for your baby
E
VERY baby is a star in its proud parents’ eyes but celebrities certainly like to give theirs the red-carpet treatment from the moment they’re born.
■ NURSERY: Create a special place for your new arrival
When it comes to creating a nursery, nothing but the best will do and no luxurious detail is overlooked, whether it’s furniture embellished with glittering crystals, elaborate fantasy murals, or exquisite hand-built furniture. Singer Beyonce and her husband Jay-Z reportedly spent around £1m kitting out three nurseries in their various homes for daughter, Blue Ivy Carter. As well as a miniature pink bath, studded with 45,000 Swarovski crystals, and a matching high chair (£10,000), they’re also said to have a solid gold rocking horse as one of their daughter’s first toys. If your income isn’t quite in the
same league as Beyonce, not to worry. You can still create a haven for your precious new arrival. Parents always view the nursery as a special place. It’s their child’s own room and one in which they spend their early years. Today many parents are opting for colour and personality in their nursery rooms and moving away from neutral colours. The days of basic pink or blue seem to have passed and parents are choosing bright and cheerful in a range of colours to suit both boys and girls. Many are choosing to decorate in a host of bright colours and choose themes like zoos, rainbows, ladybirds, bumble bees etc. Hand painted murals are also extremely popular. Once you’ve decided on your colour and theme, try to find special accessories to dress the room.
■ BRIGHT: This nursery has a range of strong colours, ideal for both boys and girls
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MEET JACOB
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A real water baby ready to find his feet
been a really good baby and although he's not sleeping through yet, he is in his own room and he does very well.' Last Sunday Ash and Charlotte celebrated Jacob's christening at Lepton Parish Born on October 28 in the Church followed by a get hospital's new birthing centre, together with their families and Jacob Jack Derek Dunstan is the friends. son of Ash Dunstan and True to form Jacob behaved Charlotte Apedaile of Shelley. himself and a great day was had Weighing in at 8lbs 1oz, Jacob by all. arrived after a trouble-free Now Jacob is six-months-old pregnancy for Charlotte and he's ready for off and has surprised everyone by arriving started sitting up, rolling over on his due date, which is quite and even shows signs of trying unusual, especially for a first to crawl. He is very alert and is baby. quickly learning to socialise As well as being a welcome with other babies when he goes arrival for the two families, swimming and out and about Jacob also created something of with mum and dad. a stir when he was born with a Charlotte and Jacob have caul over his face. recently completed a Sure Start This is a rare occurrence and five week baby massage course ■ BATHTIME: Little Jacob loves his babies born with a caul (a which is good for relaxing portion of the birth membrane) bubbles in the bath young babies, particularly after over their faces are said to be bath time to get ready for bed. lucky. Once born, the thin translucent lining is peeled “He still likes me to massage his legs and it does seem off the face and the baby looks like any other ■ HAPPY: Little Jacob’s nearly always got a smile on his face to relax him, although now he is too busy trying to roll newborn. over and set off,'' said Charlotte. Looking back in history, His parents are already looking forward to Jacob's babies born with a caul next six months during which time he should find his were regarded as special feet and start taking his first tentative steps. and destined for greatness. In no time at all he will be marking his first birthday Much mention is made of and changing from a small baby into a toddler, ready this in historical literature to investigate the world around him. and it is always deemed to bring good fortune and success in life. His mother Charlotte said: “We were told this is very rare and it looked as if Jacob had a veil over his face. Jacob's was a water birth and it seems now that he loves the water. I take him swimming regularly and he just loves his bath time.'' Although the first six months of Jacob's life have flown by, Charlotte and Ash have loved every minute of life with their new son. “Nothing can prepare you for a new baby and how this will change your life. It's just been a magical time and Jacob has changed our lives for the better. He's now in a regular routine with his feeding and naps during ■ SUNDAY BEST: All dressed up ready his big day, the day and his evening ■ PROUD: Parents Ash and Charlotte in the early days when Jacob was just a few weeks old the christening held at Lepton Parish Church bath and bedtime. He's
ODAY is a landmark day in the life of young Jacob Dunstan – it's exactly six months since he arrived bang on his due date at Huddersfield Royal Infirmary.
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HEALTHY EATING DAILY MENU SUGGESTIONS
■ GOOD EXAMPLE: Eat well and your children will follow your lead and eat healthy both at home and at school
● A typical day’s recommended meals might be: ● Breakfast: Starchy food such as low or medium-sugar content cereal with milk, or toast, and fruit juice or dried fruit. ● Morning snack: Half a muffin with spread and a portion of fruit, plus a drink of water or milk. ● Lunch: Fish pie with seasonal vegetables, with a dessert such as apple crumble with custard. ● Afternoon snack: Low-fat breadsticks with egg, tomatoes and a drink of milk. ● Tea: Risotto or a stir-fry, with a fresh fruit salad dessert.
Healthy eating is essential from day one E
NCOURAGING your child to eat his or her greens is often one of the most difficult aspects of parenthood.
With child obesity rates rising, it is essential to get your child into good eating habits from day one. All parents want to give their children the best start in life – and a vital part of that good start is a healthy diet. But with 66% of mothers now working full or part-time, more under-fives than ever are attending childcare, and responsibility for their diet lies with child carers as well as parents. As most parents know, providing healthy food for toddlers is far from easy. But, after an independent report flagged up demand from both childcare providers and parents for clearer guidance on what to feed children under five, the School Food Trust (SFT) has stepped in with new voluntary guidelines that it hopes regulated childcare settings including nurseries, childminders, nannies, pre-schools, children’s centres and playgroups, will follow. Non-regulated settings, such as parent and toddler groups, are also encouraged to use the guidance when providing food and drink for children. The Eat Better, Start Better guide includes information about the foods child carers should offer young children, portion sizes, sample menus and recipes, advice on tackling fussy eating, and how to involve children in food and cooking activities. School Food Trust nutritionist Tricia Mucavele
explains: “The guidelines were brought in in response to demand by both childcare providers and parents, who said there was significant confusion about how to feed children well in early years settings.” It’s also important that children under five eat a diet appropriate for their age, rather than for older children and adults, as young children are growing quickly and have high energy and nutrient requirements for their size. They should also eat smaller amounts than older children and adults. Tricia points out that more than a fifth of children are overweight or obese by their first year at primary school, and says the guidance will help to address the issue. She says: “A diet for older children and adults is inappropriate for the under-fives, because an adult diet should be low in fat, sugar and salt and high in fibre, but if you had a low-fat and high-fibre diet for children under five it would be too bulky.” The guidelines are based on the four food groups of starchy foods; fruit and vegetables; meat, fish, eggs, beans and other non-dairy sources of protein; and milk and dairy foods. Mucavele points out that some children may be in childcare for 10 hours a day, so 90% of their food and drink is consumed at the setting. Others may move from one setting to another during the day, for example from a childminder to a pre-school class. “If all settings use the guidance,” she says, “that means that even if a child has breakfast at one setting and lunch in another, they’ll still be getting the appropriate daily amount of energy
■ LUNCH: These schoolchildren are tucking in to a healthy and nutritious meal and nutrients.” Commenting on the new guidelines, Children’s Minister Sarah Teather said: “Healthy eating is at the heart of helping every child get the best start in life.
“Nurseries play a vital role in getting children to develop good eating habits – but many lack the expert knowledge of what is the best food to serve.”
SAFETY AND EDUCATION
Safety on the move for your little ones F
ROM the moment you discover you are going to become a parent you are plunged into a whole new world of bewildering decisions about ‘what is going to be best for your baby.’ Even before your little one leaves hospital a crucial decision has to be made about the best way to protect your bundle of joy from danger on their journey home. Midwives now insist that every baby should leave hospital in an appropriate car seat when they are travelling by car. It is the law to use a car seat from birth until your child reaches either 135cms in height or 12 years of age – whichever comes first. And it is the driver’s responsibility to ensure that children under the age of 14 years old are restrained correctly.
As small babies sleep so much, you can often move your baby in and out of the car in the car seat while they are sleeping without waking them up. Infant carriers have a carrying handle to make this easier. They also usually come with little pillows known as head huggers, which make sure that your newborn baby's head doesn't wobble about as they travels in the car. You will need to use these for the first three months or so until your baby can hold their head up on their own. Some infant car seats can also be used as a handy rocking chair to get baby off to sleep at home. Three-in-one
Many of today’s three-in-one travel systems incorporate a car seat which can be fitted straight into a pushchair or pram – very handy for going out shopping! Correct weight Your first car seat will usually only last for the The weight of your baby first nine to 12 months, determines the correct until you need to buy a group of car seat to use and second-stage, you will need to buy a new forward-facing Group 1 seat when your baby seat. outgrows its current one. However, be guided by You will start off by having your baby’s weight, rather a rear facing car seat or than his/her age. infant carrier (Group 0) You can, however, buy which will accommodate a combination car seats baby up to 29lb (13kg) and ■ SAFETY: Road Safety Officer Angela Hewitt which start off facing gives your baby’s head and checks 18 month-old Harry Tilston's child safety seat backwards but can be to ensure that it has been fitted properly at a recent neck vital support. converted to a safety event As long as the crown of forward-facing seat as your baby's head does not your child grows. stick up above the top of the seat, he or she should stay When it comes to choosing a car seat, always try facing backwards for as long as possible before it’s time before you buy as different makes and models suit to invest in a forward-facing seat. different cars.
■ CAR: Get a professional to check your car seat is fitted correctly. Even as your children grow, they will still need a car seat for many years to come
Important educational choices to make
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O give your child the best start in life, you need to give him or her a good education.
Choosing the right nursery and school will be important decisions for you to make. If your child shows signs of being very bright, it is important to choose a nursery or school which give the necessary support. It’s vitally important that your child is happy with the choice of nursery and school as he or she will spend
many hours there. Make a point of visiting local nurseries before you make a final decision. Most will welcome you to look round and see how their children are playing and working. You can also meet the staff and see how they interact with the children in their care. Look at work on display to see the kind of work the children do. Try and gauge how welcoming the nursery or school is and also think about how easy it will be to travel and to and from your eventual choice.
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