Finding Mr. Right

Kristin Hopkins

How a Jersey City lawyer loved and lost on “The Bachelor”

Finding love in the time of COVID-19 can be tough. “I tried the apps at the beginning of quarantine,” says Kristin Hopkins. “They’re really not my vibe at all.”

But she is open to being set up.

Hopkins’s mom was watching “Good Morning America” when they announced that Matt James was chosen to be the first Black leading man on the reality TV show, “The Bachelor” after 25 seasons. The decision came after fans petitioned ABC to feature a Black leading man. Hopkins got a call from her mom. “She was like, ‘Oh Kristin, he’s fine, he’s cute, you should definitely look into it.’”

Hopkins Googled James, and she liked what she saw. “He’s 6-foot-5. He’s employed. He’s attractive. All of the boxes are being checked off here,” Hopkins says. Plus Mom already approved. “I was like, ‘Let’s see what happens’.”

A friend of hers, who’s a longtime fan of the show, submitted Hopkins’s application, and the casting process began. That’s when Hopkins, who had never seen the show, decided to watch a couple of episodes.

And the Rest is History

She realized that she isn’t the typical contestant. It’s not uncommon for contestants to have job descriptions like Social Media Participant or Aspiring Dolphin Trainer, but Hopkins is an attorney for a Manhattan firm.

“That was something that I thought about during the casting process,” she says. “I’m an attorney. Will people think that I’m not professional because I went on this show? But then I started to realize that I’m going on the show to find love, and if they see that as unprofessional then I don’t want to work for that person. I just tried to be who I am, and I don’t think that I’m an unprofessional person. I don’t think anything that I did was unprofessional, and I don’t think the show is that way. As long as you carry yourself well then you’ll be okay.”

Hopkins joined the most diverse cast of women that the show has ever featured.

Reflective of America

“I would not have applied if it weren’t a Black man who was the bachelor,” Hopkins says. “That’s just my preference for men. I was very excited about this opportunity because it’s the first time that they have a Black bachelor. Obviously, that comes with a more diverse cast than ‘The Bachelor’ normally has. I was very excited to be able

to share a more diverse love onscreen. That’s not something that you normally see. I hope that ‘The Bachelor’ continues to cast diverse contestants. I think that America’s changing. When I go out to a bar, and I’m trying to see if I’ll meet a guy there’s tons of people in the bar to choose from, not just Black, not just white, there’s everyone. I think that a dating pool should be reflective of America.”

Hopkins’s love story with Matt James lasted only three episodes.

Trouble in Paradise

All the love stories this season are overshadowed by online photos that surfaced after filming. One of Hopkins’s fellow contestants, Rachael Kirkconnell, who is white, was called out for social media “likes” that included images of the Confederate flag, and photos of her donning a hoop skirt at an Old South party.

Hopkins was called out online for her past behavior, but for much better reasons. A college classmate tweeted that Hopkins had helped her when a man latched on to her at a party and tried to follow her home.

Hopkins recalls the experience: “My college had an alumni event. I don’t think the guy who was trying to hit on my friend even went to my school. I think he saw a ton of people hanging around and just came over and started trying to talk to us. It was weird vibes the entire time. I was like, ‘Girl you can stop talking to him. There’s no need to keep talking to this man.’ As we were about to leave, he started following us to the subway. My friend lived in Brooklyn. and I was on the Lower East Side, so I was like, ‘You know what, I’m just going to ride with you to your apartment.’”

Hopkins had been assaulted on the subway in the past when a person kicked her, and no one intervened.

Matt James Key Art | ABC

The Final Curtain

As the season nears its finale, it’s clear that Kirkconnell has caught James’s attention.

The show’s host and producer Chris Harrison spoke out on Kirkconnell’s behalf in an interview with Rachel Lindsay, the first Black bachelorette who found love on the show in 2017. Lindsay is now a TV host on “Extra.” Harrison came under fire for the way he spoke to Lindsay.

ristin Hopkins ABC |Craig Sjodin

“Who is Rachel Lindsay, and who is Chris Harrison, and who is whatever woke police person out there, who are you?” Harrison asked during the “Extra” interview where he said that Kirkconnell deserved “grace” for her actions instead of demands for an explanation.

Top row: Chelsea, Sarah, Alicia, MJ, Sydney, Illeana, Emani, Magi, Serena C., Kaili, Mari, Rachael, Casandra, Lauren, Khaylah, Corrinne Bottom row: Alana, Abigail, Carolyn, Marylynn, Kimberly, Kristin, Kit, Bri, Matt James, Jessenia, Serena P., Anna, Kati

ABC |Craig Sjodin

“It was hard to hear some of the things that were expressed by Chris Harrison,” Hopkins says. “It was hard for me to watch, especially as a woman, and a Black woman at that. I have had that happen before where a white male was bulldozing over everything that I said and wouldn’t let me get a word in and wasn’t understanding my perspective. It was very upsetting to see how adamantly he was defending Rachael’s behavior.”

Backlash

After the interview received backlash Harrison apologized via Instagram for “speaking in a manner that perpetuates racism” and for the tone he used with Lindsay.

Days later, Harrison revealed that he would step away from his “The Bachelor” hosting duties. It was announced that football player and writer of “Uncomfortable Conversations with A Black Man,” Emmanuel Acho will be Harrison’s temporary replacement.

Hopkins and some of her castmates released this anonymously authored statement on social media:

“We are the women of ‘Bachelor Season 25.’ Twenty-five women who identify as BIPOC were cast on this historic season that was meant to represent change.

“We are deeply disappointed and want to make it clear that we denounce any defense of racism. Any defense of racist behavior denies the lived and continued experiences of BIPOC individuals. These experiences are not to be exploited or tokenized.

“Rachel Lindsay continues to advocate with ‘grace’ for individuals who identify as BIPOC within this franchise. Just because she is speaking the loudest, doesn’t mean she is alone. We stand with her, we hear her, and we advocate for change alongside her.”

Kristin Hopkins ABC |Craig Sjodin

We are Family

“It was really amazing to see how everyone came together to post that statement,” Hopkins says. “I certainly felt like maybe I’m the only one that’s offended by this interview, but no, mostly everyone in our cast was. To see everyone come together and post the statement, it made me feel like I was in a family.”

For Hopkins, it wasn’t the love story she imagined when she signed up. “It was not what I was expecting for sure, but I think that what has happened has highlighted a bunch of systemic issues within the franchise that needed to be fixed. Just putting contestants of color in the cast is not enough. You need to make those changes within the franchise itself to truly have a fair process,” which means hiring more diverse editors and producers.

Hopkins says she is hesitant to continue with the franchise, which typically casts former contestants in future shows. “I would like to see some changes before considering ‘Bachelor in Paradise.’ I wouldn’t want to show my love story where it won’t be handled with care.”

Hometown Barhopping

“Yes, I am still single,” she says, and she’s ready to mingle in Jersey City. When she was first introduced on the show, she spoke about her love of rooftop bars. Which spot was she talking about?

“There’s RoofTop at Exchange Place,” she says. “I like going there. There are so many people here. You can go to bars and the waterfront. The Ashford, Porta, all of those places I hit up when it’s warm. I enjoy that there is that culture over on that street.” That street is the Newark Avenue pedestrian plaza.

“Before COVID it was always popping,” she says. “Me and my friends would go down there and just hang out and pop from bar to bar to bar. It was just a really great place to meet and connect with people and hang out after work. I will definitely be back when COVID is over.”—JCM