THE PR SHOP

WITH DAVE BULLARD

WRITE WITH POWER: GET SHORT, SHARP AND SIMPLE

I taught broadcast newswriting a few times as an adjunct college instructor. On day one, my students arrived to find this on the whiteboard: “Short, Sharp & Simple.” It stayed there all semester.

That four-word mantra is my way of explaining how to write smart, powerful copy and it’s as good a guide for writing PR and marketing copy as it is for writing news stories.

Short: Use short words and short sentences. Commas can impair understanding by cutting a thought in half with a different thought between them. Semicolons are just two sentences jammed together and work just as well with a period between them. A long sentence is almost always a forced and unhappy marriage of two short sentences. Divorce them. There’s a small word that can take the place of a big word. Sometimes, it takes two or three words. Not everyone understands big words even though they look important in a news release or a statement. The whole purpose of “short” is to give everyone a chance to understand what you want to say.

Sharp: Use strong words to create sharp and unforgettable images in the minds of your readers. Start with strong verbs. The verbs “to be” and “to have” signal passive sentence construction. How many times have you written “the winner will be announced on Tuesday?” There’s that pesky, passive form of “to be” for us to deal with. How about: “The festival announces the winner Tuesday.” Even better, use “picks” or “crowns” instead of “announces.” All three are much stronger verbs in an active, present-tense voice.

Simple: Tell a simple story. Don’t jump around in time – keep things in a simple, chronological order whenever possible. The fairy tales we heard as children always began with “once upon a time” and finished with “and they all lived happily ever after.” They started at the earliest point and finished at the latest point. It’s effective because that’s how the brain works. Its filing system is sequential.

A former colleague of mine once said that a story should be able to be summed up in one sentence. Anything that doesn’t fit with that sentence is out. I think this works whether we’re talking about a slide deck presentation to a potential sponsor, a memo to the boss, a press release, or a social media post. A simple story is simply more memorable and more powerful.

So how do you apply this principle to your everyday writing?

First, edit ruthlessly. Chop and chop again. William Strunk, Jr., in Strunk and White’s indispensable writing guide “The Elements of Style,” said, “Vigorous writing is concise. A sentence should contain no unnecessary words, a paragraph no unnecessary sentences, for the same reason that a drawing should have no unnecessary lines and a machine no unnecessary parts. This requires not that the writer make all his sentences short, or that he avoid all detail and treat his subjects only in outline, but that every word tell.”

Start with qualifiers and modifiers. They are often the empty calories of content. Over, almost, barely, little, big, famous – these are some of the adjectives and adverbs that you can chop from your writing without harm. If the band you’ve booked is world-famous, tell me instead how many hits they’ve had and Grammys they’ve won. More words? Yes. But they’re better words – they show instead of tell.

Kill the prepositional phrase. “Following the race, the awards ceremony was held…” How many awards ceremonies happen before the race? “During the event, many volunteers came out to….” How many volunteers come after the event is over? We like to call something a signature event when we can explain why it’s so special. (PS: Nobody cares. If an element of your event is great, your customers will decide how great it is. If it’s truly as big as you think it is, they will tell you, not the other way ‘round.)

Once you’ve pruned as much dead weight as possible, you can think about what to put in. Use power words, like free, safe, easy and now to help guide people to make the purchase or put your event on their calendars. Stop and think about the reader: Their wants and needs are different from your event’s. Write from their point of view –the experience they will have, the ease of taking part, and most of all, the emotional benefit they will receive from being there.

These guidelines aren’t perfect. They are a way for you to start thinking about your writing in a way that will help you build better copy and spur you to continue your writing education. Everything we do in public relations, marketing and sponsorship begins with words (remember that images are just words in another language). We writers are mechanics. We need an intimate understanding of the tools in our toolbox to achieve the highest success.

Dave Bullard, CFEE is owner of FanFirst Events and Influence, consulting on production, public relations and marketing for events and festivals. He served for 10 years as PR and Marketing Manager of the Great New York State Fair, directing a $1 million marketing budget for the 1.3 million-attendance festival. Dave is available anytime to IFEA members to kick around ideas and brainstorm solutions. He also moderates the IFEA PR & Marketing Affinity Group. He’s at debullard@gmail.com and 315-575-6320.