“Knowing others is wisdom; Knowing the self is enlightenment; Mastering others requires force; Mastering the self needs strength�
~ Lao Tzu
Personal Learning Paper Nilotpal Ray PGP-12-198
Personal Learning Paper
1.0
2012
Discovering myself: Who am I? From the time a child is born, he tries to search for his identity. This is what makes the child cry, makes him to search for attention. But the child is totally unaware of it. Now, as time fly by and the child grows up, this ‘knowing me’ factor slowly becomes more pronounced. His social circle starts to develop. He makes new friends. He learns that there is also a world waiting for him outside his comfort world of ‘mom & dad’. And most important, he has to make an identity for himself in that world. This makes the urge to knowing thyself much more. Slowly from childhood, he moves towards puberty. Then a boy becomes a ‘boy’ and a girl becomes a ‘girl’. It is an amazing journey filled with excitement, fear, trepidation, mood swings, joy, despair etc. All emotions carved together in a kaleidoscope, changing colors now & then. Finally, he becomes a man. But does it stop the process of knowing thyself? Possibly not. To me it seems that that a person is in the process of knowing thyself right from the cradle to the graveyard. I think that no person in any point of their life can say that ‘I now know myself completely’. It is a process that is perpetual. The destination is immaterial. It is that journey that really matters. The basic purpose of the People & Performance Program of S. P. Jain Institute of Management & Research is to facilitate this learning process. Through a number of psychometric tools and analyses, it creates an epiphanous self of oneself in front of him or her. This mining of one’s character brings forth a number of nuances of the character which he or she was not aware of before. So, what is the takeaway from this program? Simple, ‘knowing thyself’ and finally finding out the areas of one’s strength and working on them. Bottom line: Develop your strengths and play on them.
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I, me & myself: Self Esteem, Self-Efficacy & Self Knowledge: Every man has a mental picture of himself in his mind. This encompasses the questions like: ‘How will I be as a boss?’ or ‘How will I be as an employee?’ or ‘How will I be as a Manager?’ or ‘How will I be as a husband?’ or ‘How will I be as a father?’ etc. Every man has a basic knowledge of self-efficacy & self-knowledge. The domain of one’s knowledge base and efficacy base is pretty much known to a person. But the paradox is, most of the time, a man judges himself not by situation, but by belief. To explain, to see how he is as a boss, he most first become the boss. To see how he is as a father, he must first become a father. To perceive how he will behave as a teacher suppose, he must be in that role at least once. Moreover, the zodiac sign of a person hugely influences his/her personality traits. Now, through this P&P Program, I got to know a bit about these factors. The whole Personal Growth Lab at Lonavala directed me towards getting to test some of these role-plays of life in some way or the other. At times I was the boss, at
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Personal Learning Paper
times I was the employee, at times I was the teacher. So, in the following chart I will enumerate what were my beliefs, and eventually what were my revelations. What I thought
Self Efficacy
Self Knowledge
Self Esteem
3.0
What was revealed
Though I was right with my confidence, I I thought I was quite self efficient. learnt that there are many things in life Any work that comes my way, thatcannot be done alone. You need to however big or mammoth it may be, I work as a team. In all domains of life, this will always be able to handle it. I 'one man army' type attitude do not go. have that 'one man army' type Hence, I learnt the values of dependency attitude. & team-work.
I was quite confident about my knowledge base. What I did not know, I tell it explicity. But what I know, I know it in and out.
This was true indeed. In most of the inbound & outbound group activities, my knowledge base paid off.
I always hold myself in high self Though having a high self esteem is a good esteem. Being a taurus man, my ego thing, but one should know how to control part is very strong. If somebody hurts it. Otherwise it can ran amok sometimes my ego, I retaliate,and I retaliate very and ruin professional & personal badly. relationships.
My house and my curtains: The Johari Window: The development & subsequent analysis of my Johari Window gave a lot of insights to my personality. It is really a very useful personality development tool created by Joseph Luft & Harry Ingham. This gives a very deep insight into ones character and explicitly shows up regions which one need to work upon. By working upon my Johari window, really gave me a feel about which arenas of my character I need to work upon. This concept is clearly related to the ideas propounded in the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator program, which interestingly in turn derive from theories about the personality first explored by psychologist Carl Jung.
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Personal Learning Paper
My Johari Window (Area Distribution) Known by 0% self 10%
Known by others
Unknown by self
Arena
Blindspot
Faรงade
Unknown
100%
24%
Unknown by others
100%
My Johari Window (Attributes) Known by 0% self
Known by others
10%
Unknown by self
100%
Trustworthy Honest Sincere
Intelligent, Smart, Friendly, Closed, Attractive, Bold, Fexible, Friendly, Submissive, Good Team Member, Open, Sesitive
Creative, Warm, Hardworking, Caring, Emotional, Courteous, Passive
Unknown
24%
Unknown by others
100%
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Personal Learning Paper 4.0
What Kind of a person am I and how does it affect my relationships:
This was analyzed by the Big 5 Locator Tool:
Big 5/OCEAN Locator Plot Conscientiousness
63
Agreeableness
54
Openess
46
Extraversion
46
Negetive emotionality
36 0
Low
10
20
30
Medium
40
50
60
70
High
Conscientiousness: I rank pretty high in conscientiousness. High conscientiousness deals with a dependable, organized, disciplined, cautious and stubborn attitude. Due to this reason I am perceived to be a very good team member. High conscientiousness is a quality required in manager where a very quick decision is to be arrived at as a team. Agreeableness: I rank quite high on agreeableness. This can be looked upon as just an extension for my high rank in conscientiousness. Because, agreeableness & conscientiousness goes hand in hand. This also implies that I am a bit submissive type and often try to avoid differences of opinions by quickly agreeing to what others are saying. As per the Big 5 Locator sheet, I am trusting, humble, altruistic, tam player, conflict averse and frank. Openness: I am moderately open. Openness of ideas is an important trait of a manager. In organizations, many a times a good idea goes unnoticed due to the fear of speaking or expressing oneself. So, one must be diplomatically open for the good of the company. Extraversion: I am moderately extrovert. This has changed over time. Two to three years back, I was a very introvert kind of person. Now, due to more mingling with different sorts of people at S.P. Jain I have added to my extraversion. Negative Emotionality: I rank very low in negative emotionality. This is because most of the times, I do not want to show emotions in public, lest others think of me as a weak person. So, I am more if a coconut, hard from outside, soft from inside. Nilotpal Ray (PGP-12-198)
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Locus of control: It is the degree to which people believe that they are masters of their own fate. Internals – Individuals who believe they control what happens to them Externals – Individuals who believe that what happens to them is controlled by outside forces such as luck or chance. I am a very internal kind of person. I believe man decides his own fate. At the end of the day, it is our choices that make us who we are. Machiavellianism: It is the degree to which an individual is pragmatic, maintains emotional distance, & believes that ends can justify means. I think this suits me quite a lot. In every aspect of life, I try to see the practical implications. I am emotionally attached to a very few persons, and they are very special indeed. So, others think of me as a non-emotional person. Narcissism: It is the tendency to be arrogant, have a grandiose sense of self importance, require excessive admiration, & have a sense of entitlement. Yes, I am a bit narcissist, not excessive although. Whenever I do a new job or project, and the project is really of value to me, I do it with my full dedication. But, the catch is, even if the job is not up to the mark to my boss or superiors, I really find it difficult to look into any flaws in it. To me, what I do must be perfect. Moreover, it also happens sometimes that I feel dejected when people do not give me enough importance. Self-monitoring: It is a personality trait that measures an individual’s ability to adjust his or her behavior to external situational factors. There is a saying, ‘When in Rome, be a Roman’. I am really very talented in this front. With most of the people, I am able to forge my emotions & behavior. This has both a positive & negative implication. To be a diplomat, you must not show your true emotions at wrong places. I strongly believe in this value. Type A personality: This involves aggressive involvement in a chronic, incessant struggle to achieve more and more in less & less time &, if necessary, against the opposing efforts of other things or other people. I am not that much of a type A personality. I do not feel at ease to be in a rat race. Being in a rat race always places me in a discomfort zone. I believe that winners stand apart and if I am good at something, I do not have to worry about my competitors. I am more of a Type B personality. Proactive personality: They are the people who identify opportunities, show initiative, take action, and persevere until meaningful change occurs. I am at optimality when it comes to proactive approaches. If some project is of my interest, then it is easy for me to be proactive. But, when a project does not impress me, it becomes very difficult for me to show proaction. I take time to acclimatize in new environment. So, I take time in deciphering new possibilities in an unknown domain. But, once I get my hands on a new idea or niche domain, I get determined to reap gold out of it.
Nilotpal Ray (PGP-12-198)
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Personal Learning Paper
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2012
Emotional Intelligence-The EQ Map:
The above is my plot of the different emotional intelligence factors. As expected from my previous discussions, my trust radius and personal power are at its best. On the other hand, my work pressure and satisfaction, personal pressure and satisfaction and intentionality are at the lowest points. So I need to be aware of these issues. My resilience, interpersonal connections, constructive discontents are above average. So is my outlook and intuition. I am in the vulnerable region for my compassion. This means that though I am aware of others feelings, I am always not that spontaneous to express them. With my interpersonal connections and constructive discontent ranking above average, I can say that I am pretty decent in handling conflicts. Moreover, if I look at my Big 5 OCEAN Locator once again, it will be augmented by a high score in conscientiousness and agreeableness. My personal power is at the best position. Hence, I can bounce back as a crazy ball from the deepest pitfalls of my life. My trust radius is also very high which implies that in my deepest dark days, I still find people whom I can trust. I should start working upon some of the vulnerable areas of my EQ Map viz. work pressure, personal pressure and intentionality. Somehow, I tend to yield to pressure very easily. So I have to build on that. I should try to be more compassionate towards my friends and peers. This is how I will be able to build up a more social circle. As a domino effect to this, my social life, quality of life, relationship quotient etc. all will start to increase. Nilotpal Ray (PGP-12-198)
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Personal Learning Paper 6.0
My Motivational Needs:
Firo-B Score Profile
I
C
A
e
3
5
0
w
0
0
5
Motivation is the processes that account for an individual’s intensity, direction, and persistence of effort toward attaining a goal. As per the FIRO Score sheet, my needs of life can be analyzed as follows: Social Inclusion Expressed (3/9) & Social Inclusion Wanted (0/9): This means that I am typically a loner kind of person who loves to be alone. My personality is more of a ‘thinker’ kind. More of like John Nash of the movie ‘A Beautiful Mind’. This may be due to the fact that I am very fond of ruminating over my thoughts. I am a person who loves to retrospect. Work Control Expressed (5/9) & Work Control Wanted (0/9): This implies that I am not that kind of a proactive person who will jump into anything or nothing at hand. I always look before leaping, probably at time too much. But if some job is assigned to me, I take utmost care for its completion. Personal Affection Expressed (0/9) & Personal Affection Wanted (5/9): I am very protective about my emotions. Maybe this is due to the fact that I have been bitten by the sweet-tooth of love once. Since, then I have become more cautious about expressing my emotions. It is not due to the fact that I fear the probability of rejection, but more due to the fact that when something like this happens, there is a very erratic flow of emotions in my mind, body & soul which becomes difficult for me to stand. On the other hand, I do want personal affection. I am a loner kind of person and hence, this is natural for any man like me. But things do not click with me all the time. But I am a patient person who does not complain of waiting. I strongly believe that ‘The best things in life take a little longer to find’.
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Personal Learning Paper 7.0
My Position in Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs:
I am Here
8.0
Me as a Manager: My HJS Management competency plot goes as follows:
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Communication: With respect to managerial competencies, I rank pretty close to communication skills. I am a good presenter. I am also a good speaker. Previously I also emphasized upon my diplomacy. Hence, mostly I tell people what they want to hear. This connects me to my audience. I am also able to catch the nerves of the audience. Planning & Administration: With respect to skillset in planning & administration, I rank nearly close to the managerial capabilities. From the childhood, planning & administration has always been my forte. Structured thinking of complex problems and work breakdown structures are something with which I am very much at ease. However big and complex the problem may be, I never panic with the state of the affairs. Teamwork: I am still building upon my capabilities of being a team member. From, my Big 5 OCEAN Locator, it is evident that I am high on agreeableness & conscientiousness. These are the most inherent capabilities to run a team. Moreover, I am also a thinker king of person and hence I can bring in new ideas and innovations within the company/team. Strategic Action: I rank very much low in strategic action with respect to a manager. This may be due to the fact that I am still not that much exposed to any strategic decision making situations. So, this is a domain which I need to work on in future to gain excellence. Global awareness: I am still to build upon this skillset. I have to work hard on this to take me up to the level of a manager in this attribute. So, to initiate the process, I have started to read current affairs form newspapers, articles, business magazines etc. Moreover, the plethora of resources available at S.P. Jain if used smartly can add value to this attribute of mine. Self-Management: This attribute of mine is pretty high and ranks close to a manager. This is due to the fact that if we refer to my EQ Map, my self-control quotient ranks high there too. A manager should have a high degree of self-control. He should stick to his decisions, if he thinks them to be right. Sometimes it calls for going against the full workforce. This is obviously for a greater good. This requires self-control.
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Personal Learning Paper 9.0
2012
The Belbin Attribute Chart:
Implementer: The typical feature of an implementer is, they are conservative, dutiful & predictable. Positive qualities include organizing ability, practical common sense, hard-working and self-disciplined. Some of the weaknesses from which they suffer include lack of flexibility, unresponsiveness and inhibition to new ideas. On a scale of 1-5, I rank 3 here. Hence, I have some of these qualities, but I am yet to build upon the positive ones and rectify the negative ones. Coordinator: The typical features of a coordinator include calm, self-confidence & control. Positive qualities include a capacity for treating and welcoming all potential contributors on their merit and without prejudice. It also has a strong sense of objectives. Drawbacks include no more than ordinary in terms of intellect & creativity. On a scale of 1-5, I rank 4 here. Hence, I have most of these qualities, but I am yet to build upon the positive ones and rectify the negative ones. Shaper: The typical features include highly strung, outgoing & dynamic. Positive qualities include drive and a readiness to challenge inertia, ineffectiveness, complacency or selfdeception. Negative qualities include proneness to provocation, irritation and impatience. On a scale of 1-5, I rank 3 here. Hence, I have some of these qualities, but I am yet to build upon the positive ones and rectify the negative ones. Plant: The typical features include individualistic, serious minded and unorthodox. Positive qualities include genius, imagination, intellect and knowledge. Negative qualities include always Nilotpal Ray (PGP-12-198)
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floating in the clouds out of reality and high inclination to disregard practical details and protocols. On a scale of 1-5, I rank 2 here. Hence, I have less of these qualities, so I am more to build upon the positive ones and rectify the negative ones. Resource Investigator: The typical features include extroverted, enthusiastic, curious and communicative. Positive qualities include a capacity for contacting people and exploring anything new. Negative qualities include liable to lose interest once the initial interest dies down. On a scale of 1-5, I rank 1 here. Hence, I have very less of these qualities, so I am yet to build upon the positive ones. Monitor Evaluator: The typical features of a monitor evaluator include calm, self-confidence & control. Positive qualities include a capacity for treating and welcoming all potential contributors on their merit and without prejudice. It also has a strong sense of objectives. Drawbacks include no more than ordinary in terms of intellect & creativity. On a scale of 1-5, I rank 2 here. Hence, I have less of these qualities, so I am more to build upon the positive ones and rectify the negative ones. Team Worker: The typical features include highly strung, outgoing & dynamic. Positive qualities include drive and a readiness to challenge inertia, ineffectiveness, complacency or selfdeception. Negative qualities include proneness to provocation, irritation and impatience. On a scale of 1-5, I rank 3 here. Hence, I have some of these qualities, but I am yet to build upon the positive ones and rectify the negative ones. Complete Finisher: The typical feature of a complete finisher is, they are conservative, dutiful & predictable. Positive qualities include organizing ability, practical common sense, hardworking and self-disciplined. Some of the weaknesses from which they suffer include lack of flexibility, unresponsiveness and inhibition to new ideas. On a scale of 1-5, I rank 4 here. Hence, I have most of these qualities, and I am yet to build upon the positive ones and rectify the negative ones.
10.0
Analysis of McClelland’s Work Needs Assessment Inventory: The work needs assessment inventory gives us an idea about how the three important domains of work needs viz. Power Need, Achievement Need and Affiliation Need are prioritized in our personality. For example, if someone is putting more value on power needs, he is aspiring to get hold of power above anything else. One who is putting more emphasis on achievement need is trying to prove himself to the world over and above getting power or basking in love & affection. Finally, if someone is putting more emphasis upon affiliation needs, he is trying to gain more compassion & love from his friends and colleagues over and above his achievement or power needs.
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Personal Learning Paper
Now let us analyze my Work Needs Assessment Inventory. Here we see that the needs satisfied in ascending order are: Affiliation Need < Power Need < Achievement Need Hence, I am in more requirements of affiliation needs. My power needs are moderately satisfied, and my achievement needs are totally satisfied. Analyzing further, drawing my scores from the FIRO-B Chart, Personal Affection Expressed (0/9) & Personal Affection Wanted (5/9). Hence, it follows from here that my needs for personal affection is very high. My power needs are moderate. In times of my life, I have been sometimes in position of power and truly speaking I enjoyed it a lot. The feeling of power gives me a sense of power. Talking about the needs of achievement, as of now, they are less because till this point of my life I have achieved quite a bit. I am holding National Scholarships both at my X & XII levels, I have worked with a famous company like ABB Limited, and I have made into one of the top B-Schools of the country. So, the achievement needs as of now are less. The most interesting thing of this work need assessment inventory is, they change with time. For example as of now my achievement needs looks like being satisfied and my affiliation needs look unsatisfied. But it may happen that once I get married, the equation shifts in the reverse. That is, then my achievement & power needs may become hungrier than my affiliation needs.
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Personal Learning Paper 11.0
Conclusion: Balancing between the Id, the Ego and the Superego:
Extrapolating from the jargons and analyses as made till here, we can understand one basic thing. The whole purpose of this Personal Learning Paper is to know thyself better. Now, to manage oneself, there should be a perfect balance between the three psychic models of human kind: The Id, The Ego & The Super-Ego. Id, ego and super-ego are the three parts of the human psychic apparatus as defined in Sigmund Freud's structural model of the psyche. They are the three theoretical constructs in terms of whose activity and interaction mental life is described. According to this model of the psyche, the Id is the set of uncoordinated instinctual trends; on the other hand, the Ego is the organized and more of a realistic part. Finally the Super-Ego plays the critical and moralizing role. [1] Explaining Id, quoting from Sigmund Freud, New Introductory Lectures on Psychoanalysis [1933]: "It is the dark, inaccessible part of our personality, what little we know of it we have learned from our study of the DreamWorks and of the construction of neurotic symptoms, and most of that is of a negative character and can be described only as a contrast to the ego. We approach the id with analogies: we call it a chaos, a cauldron full of seething excitations.... It is filled with energy reaching it from the instincts, but it has no organization, produces no collective will, but only a striving to bring about the satisfaction of the instinctual needs subject to the observance of the pleasure principle." [2] The Ego acts according to the reality principle. It seeks to please the Idâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s drive in realistic ways that will benefit in the long term rather than bringing grief. Finally, the Super-Ego aims for perfection. It comprises that organized part of the personality structure, mainly but not entirely unconscious, that includes the individual's ego ideals, spiritual goals, and the psychic agency (commonly called "conscience") that criticizes and prohibits his or her drives, fantasies, feelings, and actions. [3] Be it in our professional life or personal life, we need to know how to strike a balance between these three mental psyches. Apart from that, internal reflection & retrospection through different psychometric tools will help us to identify our strengths and capitalize on them. ---[1] [2] [3]: Source: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Id,_ego_and_super-ego
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