QuickBytes: Robot Farmers, Lizard Dreams, and More

It’s a Bird! It’s a Plane! It’s a Burger!

Uber has undoubtedly shaken up the taxi industry, helping to make ridesharing the new norm when it comes to taking a quick trip while also providing people with a diverse array of cars to throw up in. However, the multi-billion dollar company is looking beyond replacing taxicabs and giving consumers what they really want: greasy cheeseburgers delivered by AI aircraft.

The Wall Street Journal has recently found a job listing for the company searching for an operations executive to help helm a planned drone delivery takeoff. This looks to be a part of UberExpress, Uber’s drone delivery alternative to UberEats (now that’s branding!). In fact, according to Business Insider, Uber CEO Dara Khosrowshahi was quoted in May about the project, saying, “We need flying burgers.” Interestingly, that doesn’t even crack the top 10 weirdest quotes from CEOs this year.

Do Lizards Dream of Electric Bugs?

Dreams are still one of the most fascinating aspects of the human condition. After all, who hasn’t spent hours analyzing that dream where they show up late to their classes on the day of the big test naked and begin falling? And everybody’s taken extreme joy in watching their dog “dream running.” But let’s get to the real question on everyone’s mind: Do lizards dream?

According to researchers from the CNRS and Claude Bernard Lyon 1 University, it appears that, much like birds and humans (along with other mammals), lizards exhibit two sleep states, corroborating similar studies involving the Argentine tegu and bearded dragon. Does this mean that scientists will discover more similarities between the scaly reptiles and the human race? A lizard can dream.

Tesla: Impossible

Don’t you hate it when your extremely expensive, technologically advanced car gets stolen? Yes, the one percent of us understand that can be a real pain. But what’s almost as bad as getting such a great piece of tech taken from you? Somebody posting a video of the vehicle being stolen on the world’s most popular video sharing website … which also acts as a guide on how to steal it.

In the recording posted to YouTube, the thieves utilize a tablet in order to get the passive signal of a Tesla’s key fob, which allowed them to easily enter the vehicle. The only flaw in their master plan? They couldn’t figure out how to unplug the vehicle, costing them several minutes of drivetime and ruining all dramatic flair.

While this may seem like a major flaw on Tesla’s part, the owner admittedly did not utilize such safety features as “PIN to drive” and left passive entry enabled. Regardless, one can only assume that Elon Musk will respond to the incident with a bizarre tweet that will cost the company billions of dollars.

Old Macdonald Had a Bot

From cashiers to receptionists, we’ve already seen our robotic companions begin to take over jobs. But, as you’re most likely already storing supplies and weapons for the impending robotic uprising, we assume you’re already aware. Well, in addition to the jobs we expect to be taken by machines in the future, such as taxi drivers, machine operators, and half-assed article writers, you might be able to add the American-asapple-pie occupation of farmer to that list.

Based out of Cincinnati, 80 Acres Farms is looking to utilize robotics and unique growing tactics to revolutionize the farming industry. The firm’s indoor farming methods and controlled environment, combined with robots to detect ripeness and disease, hope to increase profits and grow certain crops at any time of year. However, the farmer won’t be completely out of a job, as there will still be someone needed to input data on a smartphone. Just like our forefathers would have wanted.

Worms Just Wanna Be Young

What more can be said about worms? They’re slimy, they’re weird, and despite years or urban legends, they don’t grow into two separate beings when cut in half. (Bet you feel really sorry for mutilating all those innocent worms now, huh?) And, unless you’re impaling them to use for fish bait (you monster!), the common earthworm tends to have a lifespan of around six years. Until today, that is.

Researchers from Yale-NUS College led by Dr. Jan Gruber have recently created a pharmaceutical drug combination that can both delay the aging process and nearly double the lifespan of the Caenorhabditis elegans worm. Which is great news for all of you grieving your deceased pet Caenorhabditis elegans out there.

But while it’s great that these disgusting, monstrous creatures will live longer and look younger, what does this mean for us humans? Well, Dr. Gruber hopes that humans will benefit from this research with longer, healthier lives. Which we will need when we are inevitably overtaken by overpowered, nearly-immortal worms.

Betcha Can’t Inject Just One!

Whether it be the barbed wire tattoo you got in the 90s, the septum piercing you got at the mall after leaving your local Hot Topic, or the stretched-out ear gauges you got to shock and disappoint your grandparents, body modifications have become commonplace in our modern society. However, in this technological age, we have moved far past the simple times of analog body mods, as Swedish citizens have begun injecting microchips under their skin.

The procedure, which costs roughly $180, inserts an extremely tiny microchip under the skin, allowing users to access digital readers in order to open front doors and offices, as well as store information such as e-tickets and emergency contacts. The technology has been overwhelmingly popular, with Sweden’s leading chip company struggling to keep up with demand, which is disappointing, since my own freelance chip injecting company has yet to see one customer.