Insights Magazine: Number Nine, 2019

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NUMBER NINE, 2019


In this issue 3

The Legacy of Learning

6

A Clean Slate: How to Forgive Someone Who Has Hurt You

charles r. swindoll

insight for living ministries

9 Grandparenting

charles r. swindoll

12 How to Recognize Influence in Your Life

�nnalisa �atenaude

Q&A 13 How Should Christians View Sex Education in Schools?

steve johnson

Beyond the Broadcast 15 It's Time to Celebrate—Not Complain Insights is published by Insight for Living Canada, the Bibleteaching ministry of Charles (Chuck) R. Swindoll. Chuck is the senior pastor-teacher of Stonebriar Community Church in Texas. His international radio program Insight for Living has aired for more than 35 years. We hope this publication will instruct, inspire, and encourage you in your walk with Christ. Copyright © 2019 Insight for Living Canada. All rights reserved. No portion of this monthly publication may be reproduced in any form without prior written permission from the publisher. Unless otherwise noted, all Scripture passages are taken from the NLT. Unless otherwise noted, photography and illustration by Tim Schellenberg. IFLC is an autonomous ministry and certified member of the Canadian Council of Christian Charities. Printed in Canada.


by charles r. swindoll

Cover & Article Photo: Max van Den Oetelaar on unsplash.com


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lice it any way you wish, ignorance Our own nation saw the need for being is not bliss. Dress it in whatever garb knowledgeable...for perpetuating an eduyou please, ignorance is not attractive. cated, well-trained body of godly people Neither is it the mark of humility nor the who could proclaim God’s message with path to spirituality. It certainly is not the intelligence, authority, and conviction. companion of wisdom. Our oldest institution of higher learning— On the contrary, it is founded only 16 years What can you do the breeding ground after the landing at for fear, prejudice, and Plymouth—was estabto receive fully the superstition...the feeding lished for the purpose mental riches God trough for unthinking stated on its cornermakes available to animals...the training stone. That marker still field for slavery. It is blind you? How can you get stands near an iron gate and naked (Tennyson), that leads to the campus started today? the mother of impuof Harvard University: dence (Spurgeon), it brings despairing darkAfter God had carried us safe to New ness (Shakespeare), never settles a question England and we had builded [sic] our (Disraeli), nor promotes innocence (Brownhouses, provided necessaries for our ing). And yet it remains the favourite plea of livelihood, reared convenient places the guilty, the excuse of the lazy—and even for God’s worship and settled the civil the Christian’s rationalization for immaturity. government, one of the next things We dare not fall into that trap! Our spiriwe longed for and looked after was to tual fathers didn’t. Trace your heritage back advance learning and perpetuate to to Moses and you find that the people were posterity, dreading to leave an illiterate given the Truth of God in written form that ministry to the churches when our they might know and that their children present ministers shall lie in the dust. might know the right path to follow. This continued until European liberalism, In Samuel’s day, a school of the prophets with its subtle narcotic of humanism and was formed to dispel the ignorance among socialism, began to paralyze the nerve centhe people. tres of theological thought and educational This philosophy carried into the New philosophy. Doubt and despair replaced cerTestament as Jesus frequently rebuked His tainty and hope. Mental discipline, honed listeners for not reading, not knowing the on the wheel of exacting academic requireunderlying principles for living. How often ments and intellectual integrity began to lag. Paul expressed similar convictions with Permissiveness became the order of the day. such strong words as, “I do not want you This evolved into a mentality that now conto be unaware.” Dr. Luke commended the siders deep thought and thorough study a church at Berea because they were “exam- joke. Thank God, there are some exceptions. ining the Scriptures daily to see whether But they are precious few...especially among these things were so” (Acts 17:11 NASB). the saints.


To be sure, there are dangers connected with being knowledgeable. Solomon warns us of the worst in Ecclesiastes: pride—the wearying, futile pursuit of knowledge, a flesh trip that can cause a head to outgrow a heart. Mere intellectualism can be only “striving after wind” (Ecclesiastes 1:17). But my single desire is to support the premise that knowledge, rather than being an enemy of the faith, is an ally...perhaps one of our strongest. I call upon C. S. Lewis to state my cause, and with him I rest my case. If all the world were Christian it might not matter if all the world were uneducated. But, as it is, a cultural life will exist outside the Church whether it exists inside or not. To be ignorant and simple now—not to be able to meet the enemies on their own ground—would be to throw down our weapons, and to betray our uneducated brethren who have, under God, no defense but us against the intellectual attacks of the heathen. Good philosophy must exist, if for no other reason, because bad philosophy

needs to be answered. The cool intellect must work not only against cool intellect on the other side, but against the muddy heathen mysticisms which deny intellect altogether. Most of all, perhaps, we need intimate knowledge of the past...the learned life then is, for some, a duty.1 Daniel and his three fellow Hebrews mentioned in Daniel 1 provide one of many biblical examples of human intellect employed for God’s purposes. As you read it, notice the quality and the source of Daniel’s intellect. What can you do to receive fully the mental riches God makes available to you? How can you get started today? Excerpted from Come Before Winter and Share My Hope, Copyright © 1985, 1994 by Charles R. Swindoll, Inc. All rights reserved worldwide. Used by permission. 1 C.S. Lewis, The Weight of Glory (New York: HarperCollins, 1978), 51

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A CLEAN SLATE How to Forgive Someone Who Has Hurt You by insight for living ministries

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alking closely with the Lord means we must come to terms with forgiving others. Yes, must. We can’t avoid or deny the fact that relationships often bring hurt and the need to forgive. Whether we have been wronged by another or the responsibility is ours, Ephesians 4:31–32 beautifully summarizes how we can have a clear conscience and be free to love and serve God with all our heart: Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice. Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you. (NIV) In different stages in our life, we may be confronted with the difficult task of forgiveness. The following chart and steps help us get started toward a choice of obedience and godly love.

Cultivate a Heart of Forgiveness 1. Deepen your understanding of God’s forgiveness through Bible study and meditation. God has been astoundingly, absurdly generous to us. Let that grace prompt humility and gratitude. See Romans 5:8 2. Learn to recognize the signs of a forgiving heart: letting go of the need for punishment, looking at the offender with pity and compassion, and choosing to reach out in love 3. Learn to respond well when old feelings come back. Rely upon the Shepherd’s help to change your heart. Turn (repent), tune in to the Shepherd’s voice (depend), and travel His path for us (obey) Steps to Forgiveness 1. First, realize that forgiveness is risky. Even a repentant offender is likely to fail again, perhaps in the same area


Image: Benjamin Elliott on Unsplash

2. Second, rely on God. Cry out, “Lord, I Test yourself by the standards found in lean on You for the grace and strength 2 Corinthians 7:8–11. If genuine, then God’s to love this one who has hurt me and to forgiveness is sufficient. Realize, too, that forgiveness can be a process. They may work for what is best for him” 3. Third, actually cancel the debt. need time to be willing to forgive. May the following prayer help you get Through prayer, express to God that you relinquish the right to collect debt started on the journey of forgiveness today. Dear Forgiving Father, on any level and to Thank you for your release your bitterness Walking closely with greatest gift, Your Son 4. F o u r t h , e v a l u a t e the Lord means we Christ Jesus, who came whether you should tell must come to terms that we might be forthe offender what you have done before God with forgiving others. given. Thank You so much for Your mercy. 5. Fifth, if appropriate, Yes, must. Give us the courage to verbally offer them forgiveness. If they repent, your show that mercy and the humility to ask relationship can resume. If not, the for it. When we have offended, make us relationship cannot be resumed; but quick to acknowledge our wrong and do with forgiveness offered, good can be whatever is necessary to be reconciled. And with those who have hurt us, may returned for evil (Romans 12:21) What If Forgiveness Can’t Be Had? we release all resentment and grudges. If you want to make things right Enable us to forget all that holds us back with someone you’ve hurt, but they are from a grace-filled life. Finally, may we find our greatest joy in unavailable, allow God’s forgiveness to suffice. Trust Him to intervene on your granting others what they don't deserve... behalf to ease any heartache you have and thereby modelling Your mercy that caused. It may help to confess your sin to has set us free. Amen. a trusted friend. If the person is available but refuses to Copyright © 2002 by Insight for Living. All rights forgive you, ask yourself, Does their refusal reserved worldwide. indicate that I haven't genuinely repented?


by charles r. swindoll


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t’s bad enough that, until recently, “Did you make your bed?” or “Have you finWebster omitted “parenting” in his ished your homework,” or “Isn’t it your turn dictionary...but continuing to disregard to do the dishes?” Grandparents’ favourite gesture is open “grandparenting” is somewhere between incompetent and inexcusable! OK, OK, so arms and their favourite question is, “What it isn’t an official word. So it lacks sufficient do you wanna do?” and their favourite roots in Anglo-Saxon linguistic lore to words are “I love you, honey.” They don’t merit a position in the ranks of Webster’s look for mistakes and failures; they forgive major reference work. So who cares about them. They don’t remember that you spent all that stuffy pedigree through which your last dollar foolishly; they forget it. And terms must pass to earn recognition in the they don’t skip pages when they read to verbiage of our American culture? I sure you...nor do they say “Hurry up” when you don’t...and neither do thousands of other want to see how far you can make the rock conscientious folks who are doing the very skip across the lake. They’ll even stop and lick an ice cream cone with ya. thing Webster chooses to ignore. But best of all, when you want to talk, Webster—the old codger—would’ve they want to listen. Long, been a good stand-in Grandparents. What loud lectures are out... so for Scrooge. Or maybe amazing gifts from are comments like “You he was like the late ought to be ashamed of W. C. Fields and just God. Generation yourself ” and “That’s didn’t like kids. On the after generation He stupid!” It’s funny, but other hand, he probprovides a fresh set of you somehow get the ably played everything them...an ever-present impression that things by the rulebook and like money and possesdidn’t let his emotions counterculture in our sions and clothes aren’t get in the way of his busy world. nearly as important as literary contribution. Too bad. Guys like that may make great you. And getting somewhere on time isn’t scholars, but little people who are look- half as significant as enjoying the trip. Grandparents. What amazing gifts ing for laps to sit on and hands to hold and somebody to sing with or help ’em from God. Generation after generation learn how to skate don’t give a rip about He provides a fresh set of them...an everadvanced degrees earned at snooty schools present counterculture in our busy world. or grammatical trivia. So what if the grey- Lest everyone else get so involved they no haired gentleman or gracious lady splits longer stop to smell the flowers or watch an infinitive or leaves a preposition dan- tiny ants hard at work, these special adults gling? What’s really important is that the are deposited into our lifestyle account. wee ones know that here’s somebody they They’ve made enough errors to understand can lean on, talk to, laugh with, learn from, that perfectionism is a harsh taskmaster walk beside, and, mainly, hug. And chances and that self-imposed guilt is a hardened are good those same grown-ups won’t ask killer. They could be superb instructors, but a lot of pin-you-to-the-wall questions, like their best lessons are caught, not taught.


Their Christianity is seasoned, filtered through the tight weave of realism, heartache, loss, and compromise. Jesus is not only their Lord, He’s their Friend and longtime Counsellor. Like a massive tree, they provide needed shade, they add beauty to the landscape, and they don’t mind being used. They’re there. Even if not much is happening, they are there. Why all this surge of what some would call sentimentality? Well, my life took on a new dimension some years ago. Another hat was added to those I was already wearing. It’s one that has become increasingly more significant as time passes, I realize. Ryan Thomas was born to our older son and daughter-in-law. A six-pound, eightounce grandson who provided my wife and me a chance to try again...only this time with a lot more to give and a lot less to prove. Stretching out in front of us are an uncertain number of years in which we’ll be able to reinvest our time and energy, our treasure and love. And even though Webster won’t acknowledge the word, grandparenting is ours to enjoy... thoroughly and continually.

It was back in 1961 that God first allowed us to call ourselves parents. How gracious of Him to give us a new title—grandparents. I remember reading back then the words of General Douglas MacArthur, entitled, “A Father’s Prayer,” a beautiful piece in which the aging leader asks God to build him a son of strong character, humble spirit, a person of compassion, determination, simplicity, greatness. His closing words almost brought tears to my eyes. After claiming all these things by faith, he adds: “Then I, his father, will dare to whisper, ‘I have not lived in vain.’” Today, the same prayer is on my lips and actual tears are on my face. The prayer is for you, Ryan, as it once was for your daddy. And the tears? Well, you’ll have to get used to them. That’s how it is with granddaddies. Excerpted from Come Before Winter and Share My Hope, Copyright © 1985, 1994 by Charles R. Swindoll, Inc. All rights reserved worldwide. Used by permission.

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rowing up my parents had rules for with Christ. He works through lies and he what I could say and do. Although knows my weaknesses well.2 The temptation to stray from Christ is I fought them at times, I knew they wanted to teach me biblical values and real. I still remember a lesson from Sunday right from wrong. Now as an adult I see school years ago. The teacher had us dress clearly my fundamental need for discern- in cardboard pieces of armour, representment in a world with many influences ing the spiritual armour of Christ. Found in Ephesians 6:10–18, these verses encourcompeting for my heart, mind, and soul. But discernment is for more than age Christians to defend their faith against knowing the difference between truth all potential harm and reminds us who we and fiction, it’s also a key to keeping my are living for. For me, this is a convicting subject. It’s focus on God. so easy to gradually In The Way of Truth in The spiritual battle accept any new idea or a World of Fiction, Chuck Swindoll urges us to waged around me is not thought without God’s make God’s Word our always apparent but the perspective. I’m sure it primary source of truth. Bible gives me insight to will require me to say “no” when I’m more often “Any fraudulent sham is potential danger. tempted to say, “yes.” harmful, but none are more devastating than false prophets and Basing my life on the truth of God’s Word is phony teachers who present their lies as lived out when I filter what I put into my heart, religious or historical truth."1 I need to mind, and soul through Scripture alone. be aware of authority figures, media, and popular theories and their influence over Annalisa Patenaude is the Living Bridge Media assistant at Insight for Living Canada. my thoughts and convictions. The spiritual battle waged around me 1 Charles R. Swindoll. The Way of Truth in a World is not always apparent but the Bible gives of Fiction, Beyond The Da Vinci Code. Plano: IFL me insight to potential danger. Scripture Publishing House, 2006 (1) says Satan uses people disguised as those 2 Charles R. Swindoll. The Way of Truth in a World who are righteous (2 Corinthians 11:15). of Fiction, Beyond The Da Vinci Code. Plano: IFL His mission is to sabotage my relationship Publishing House, 2006 (5)


LASZOK QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS FRAGEN UND ANTWORTEN QUESTIONS ET RÉPONSES VRAGEN EN ANTWOO EGUNTAS Y RESPUESTAS CEISTEANNA AGUS FREAGRAÍ 问题和解答 DOMANDE E RISPOSTE ਸਵਾਲ ਅਤੇ ਜਵਾਬ пита повіді PYTANIA I ODPOWIEDZI MGA TANONG AT MGA SAGOT вопросы и ответы PERGUNTAS E RESPOSTAS CWESTIY ATEBION SPØRSMÅL OG SVAR FRÅGOR OCH SVAR KÉRDÉSEK ÉS VÁLASZOK QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS FRAGEN TWORTEN QUESTIONS ET RÉPONSES VRAGEN EN ANTWOORDEN PREGUNTAS Y RESPUESTAS CEISTEANNA AGUS AÍ 问题和解答 DOMANDE E RISPOSTE ਸਵਾਲ ਅਤੇ ਜਵਾਬ питання та відповіді PYTANIA I ODPOWIEDZI MGA TANONG AT GOT вопросы и ответы PERGUNTAS E RESPOSTAS CWESTIYNAU AC ATEBION SPØRSMÅL OG SVAR FRÅGOR OCH RDÉSEK ÉS VÁLASZOK QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS FRAGEN UND ANTWORTEN QUESTIONS ET RÉPONSES VRAG TWOORDEN PREGUNTAS Y RESPUESTAS CEISTEANNA AGUS FREAGRAÍ 问题和解答 DOMANDE E RISPOSTE ਸਵਾਲ тання та відповіді PYTANIA I ODPOWIEDZI MGA TANONG AT MGA SAGOT вопросы и ответы PERGUNTAS E RESPO ESTIYNAU AC ATEBION SPØRSMÅL OG SVAR FRÅGOR OCH SVAR KÉRDÉSEK ÉS VÁLASZOK QUESTIONS AND ANS AGEN UND ANTWORTEN QUESTIONS ET RÉPONSES VRAGEN EN ANTWOORDEN PREGUNTAS Y RESPUESTAS CEISTEA US FREAGRAÍ 问题和解答 DOMANDE E RISPOSTE ਸਵਾਲ ਅਤੇ ਜਵਾਬ питання та відповіді PYTANIA I ODPOWIEDZ NONG AT MGA SAGOT вопросы и ответы PERGUNTAS E RESPOSTAS CWESTIYNAU AC ATEBION SPØRSMÅL O QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS FRAGEN UND ANTWORTEN QUEST ÅGOR OCH SVAR KÉRDÉSEK ÉS VÁLASZOK PONSES VRAGEN EN ANTWOORDEN PREGUNTAS Y RESPUESTAS by steve johnson CEISTEANNA AGUS FREAGRAÍ 问 答 DOMANDE E RISPOSTE ਸਵਾਲ ਅਤੇ ਜਵਾਬ питання та відповіді PYTANIA I ODPOWIEDZI MGA TANONG AT MGA просы и ответы PERGUNTAS E RESPOSTAS CWESTIYNAU AC ATEBION SPØRSMÅL OG SVAR FRÅGOR OCH SVAR KÉRD VÁLASZOK QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS FRAGEN UND ANTWORTEN QUESTIONS ET RÉPONSES VRAGEN EN ANTWOOR EGUNTAS Y RESPUESTAS CEISTEANNA AGUS FREAGRAÍ 问题和解答 DOMANDE E RISPOSTE ਸਵਾਲ ਅਤੇ ਜਵਾਬ пита повіді PYTANIA I ODPOWIEDZI MGA TANONG AT MGA SAGOT вопросы и ответы PERGUNTAS E RESPOSTAS CWESTIY ATEBION SPØRSMÅL OG SVAR FRÅGOR OCH SVAR KÉRDÉSEK ÉS VÁLASZOK QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS FRAGEN TWORTEN QUESTIONS ET RÉPONSES VRAGEN EN ANTWOORDEN PREGUNTAS Y RESPUESTAS CEISTEANNA AGUS AÍ 问题和解答 DOMANDE E RISPOSTE ਸਵਾਲ ਅਤੇ ਜਵਾਬ питання та відповіді PYTANIA I ODPOWIEDZI MGA TANONG AT GOT вопросы и ответы PERGUNTAS E RESPOSTAS CWESTIYNAU AC ATEBION SPØRSMÅL OG SVAR FRÅGOR OCH RDÉSEK ÉS VÁLASZOK

HOW SHOULD CHRISTIANS VIEW SEX EDUCATION IN SCHOOLS?

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hildren and young people will learn under the guise of moral neutrality. So second, understand that morally about sexuality from someone. Their options are peers, pornography, “neutral” sex education is a myth. Due to media, teachers at school, experimenta- the intrinsic complexities of human sextion, and their parents. Biblically, it is the uality, the physical aspects of biological responsibility of the parents to ensure their reproduction cannot be separated from children are properly educated about both moral responsibility. If you're talking the biological and moral aspects of sexu- about sex, you're talking about morality, ality. Parents are to “bring them up with and if you're talking about sex education, the discipline and instruction that comes you're talking about someone's morality. from the Lord” (Ephesians 6:4). God holds There is no such reality as sex education parents responsible for the upbringing of without morality. By definition that cantheir children not schools, churches, or not exist. The only question is whose morality is it? Leaving your children’s governments. morals and values training to others is So what’s a parent to do? First, understand that sex education dangerous. Under the guise of neutrality, sex eduin schools is done by and large from the standpoint of explaining biology, anat- cation today presents every form of sexuomy, and preventing sexually transmit- ality as normal and merely a matter of ted diseases (STDs) and unwanted preg- personal choice and mutual consent. One nancies. Since many young people are of the problems with this is that since sexually active, the assumption is that if there are no adequate normative critethey are given this information they will ria to help young people choose among have the skills to make healthy decisions. competing lifestyles, their choices will While I agree it is important for them to not be free in any meaningful sense of be educated, the problem is that it is done the term. Instead, their choices will be


arbitrary, based on only the whim of the very early. Although it may feel awkward, moment. When all sexual alternatives begin sex education early on, focusing on are presented as of equal value, young what is most appropriate at each stage of people will find it difficult to perceive the your child's life. Parents know their childifferent moral implications and social dren best and their unique characteristics and capacities enabling you to better consequences of various lifestyles. The “neutral” sex education received at teach your children than some blanket school undermines young people’s ability mass sex-education course. Before you allow a school system to to comprehend the deep moral implications of sexual behaviour. It makes them instruct in sexuality or morality, you insensitive to moral distinctions by con- must be sure your children have already veying the impression that there are no learned the truth. It is then crucial to absolute sexual norms: all forms of sex- stay abreast of what the children are learning and how they ual behaviour based Biblically, it is the are applying their on mutual consent are regarded as nor- responsibility of the parents k n o w l e d g e . Ke e p ing a constant, open mal and acceptable. to ensure their children are dialogue with your Thus, neutralizing sex properly educated about children is a key to education deprives both the biological and staying in charge of young people of the what they are learncapacity to distinguish moral aspects of sexuality. ing. When parents are between genuine love proactive in their children’s instruction, and exploitative sexuality. In addition, because of its “objective” those children have a basis upon which to and biologically reductive approach, recognize and reject errors that the world “neutral” sex education tends to use promotes as truth. By talking about the realities of the explicit sexual material, which violates young people’s moral sensitivity and human body, how men and women are natural modesty and thereby undermines made differently, and other matters related to sexuality, you help your chiltheir capacity for moral agency. Third, be aware of what your children dren feel comfortable to come to you with are learning and correct any misinfor- questions and concerns. Your child will mation given to them. That will require be informed of God's true design for sex that you talk to their teachers and find and be able to discern truth from lies as out what they are being taught. Educate they encounter sex outside of the home. your children in such a way as to equip You should also continue to educate the children to discern biblical truth from yourself as culture evolves and provide children with a positive model of what a cultural error. Finally, any sex education outside the healthy relationship looks like. home should be in addition to, not in place of, sex education at home. These Steve Johnson is the executive director at Insight for parent-child conversations must begin Living Canada.


It’s Time to Celebrate—Not Complain

“Complaining impacts the complainer, those around the complainer, and the leaders. Instead of complaining, let us be grateful for what God has done and trust Him for what He will do.” - CHUCK SWINDOLL

God brought the Israelites out of Egypt, provided water and manna to sustain them, wiped out the ruthless Egyptian pharaoh and his army, established a covenant so that He would be their God and they would be His nation, and then He dwelt among them in the tabernacle. All of this occurred within the span of about two years. Despite all these miraculous events, the Israelites let their glass-halfempty mentality drag them into complaining just after they departed Mount Sinai. The Israelites needed only to remember what God had done for them and tend to His Word because He promised to take care of them as His children. But that’s not what happened. As the Israelites marched along, they let their minds hone in on their dry tongues. This led them to focus on the “good old days” when they were slaves instead of the future bliss promised by God. In the Old Testament narratives, the Apostle Paul read about God’s past work to understand God’s more recent work through the

gospel of Jesus. In 1 Corinthians 10:1–13, Paul mentioned the Israelites’ complaining along with other events from the exodus. As Paul said to the believers in Colossae, Let the message about Christ, in all its richness, fill your lives. Teach and counsel each other with all the wisdom he gives. Sing psalms and hymns and spiritual songs to God with thankful hearts. (Colossians 3:16) For this study, reflect on what you’ve learned and how it relates to your current season of life. Simply pause. Don’t rush. Churn the passage over in your mind and pray in light of what you read. Ask God to seal His Word in your heart. Father, I trust You are working in me, giving me both the desire and the power to do what pleases You. I long to live as a bright light in this crooked and dark world—to do everything without complaining or arguing. Thank You for shining the light of Your Word in my life. Help me hold fast to it until the day I die or Christ returns. In His name, amen.

“It’s Time to Celebrate—Not Complain” is from Chuck Swindoll’s series Changing Wanderers Into Worshippers: From the Exodus to the Promised Land. You can stream this message online anytime at insightforliving.ca/audiolibrary.


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