NUMBER SIX, 2016
Positively Influencing
In this issue
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6
11
You Can Make a Difference charles r. swindoll
11 30 Days to Effective Fathering steve johnson
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The Perfect Father annalisa patenaude
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Dress Your Dreams in Denim charles r. swindoll
Beyond the Broadcast 15 What If Someone Kicks You When You’re Down?
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Insights is published by Insight for Living Canada, the Bible-teaching ministry of Charles (Chuck) R. Swindoll. Chuck is the senior pastor-teacher of Stonebriar Community Church in Texas. His international radio program Insight for Living has aired for more than 35 years. We hope this publication will instruct, inspire, and encourage you in your walk with Christ. Copyright Š 2016 Insight for Living Canada. All rights reserved. No portion of this monthly publication may be reproduced in any form without prior written permission from the publisher. Unless otherwise noted, all Scripture passages are taken from the NLT. Unless otherwise noted, photography and illustration by Laura Vanderwel. IFLC is an autonomous ministry and cover image by tori nikkel certified member of the Canadian Council of Christian Charities. Printed in Canada.
by charles r. swindoll
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verwhelming odds can make cowards of us all. Because there is so much to be done, we can easily lose heart and do nothing at all. Because there are so many people in the world to reach, it is easy to forget that God wants to use us to touch those within our sphere of responsibility. Have you ever felt like that? I have too. I remember the first time I felt overwhelmed regarding ministry. My life had been quiet and manageable. From my birthplace in a south Texas country town, I moved with my family to Houston, where we lived through my high school years. Our home was small and secure in a quiet neighbourhood. After getting married, serving a hitch in the Marine Corps, and attending seminary, Cynthia and I became involved in ministries that were like our past…small, pleasant, and fulfilling. Our children were young, our lives were rather simple, and our scope of God’s work was limited and quite comfortable. But then God called me to minister in California, which suddenly changed all that. In fact, it was as the plane descended over Los Angeles when we were going out there to candidate to lead a growing church that I got this overwhelming feeling. I
looked out the little window on the plane and watched as mile after mile of houses and freeways and buildings swept by beneath us. I tried to imagine ministering to this fast-paced, sprawling metropolis of never-ending humanity. I thought, How can I possibly get my arms around this monstrous task? What can I do to reach the multiple millions in Southern California? Suddenly, it was as if God gently reminded me of something I tell myself often: I will never reach them all—that is humanly impossible. But I am responsible for those I come in contact with, and with God’s help, I will make a difference in their lives. I stopped paying attention to the enormity of the impossible and started pouring my time and energy into the possible: the people and the place to which God had called me to serve Him. Call my vision limited if you will, but it has made all the difference in my peace of mind. It can do the same for you. You cannot do it all. You can’t get your arms around the vast boundaries of your city or your entire state. No one can! But you are able to touch those who come into the scope of your influence. Peace of mind comes in knowing that in at least their lives, your touch can make a difference, even if it is only one here and another there.
I’ll never forget a story I read recently. A businessman and his wife took a few days of relaxation at an oceanfront hotel. One night a violent storm lashed the beach and sent massive breakers thundering against the shore. The wind finally died down, and shortly before daybreak the man slipped out of bed and took a walk along the beach to see what damage had been done. As he strolled, he saw that the beach was literally covered with starfish that had been thrown ashore and helplessly stranded by the great waves. Once the morning sun would begin to burn through the clouds, the starfish would dry out and die. Suddenly, the man saw an interesting sight. A young boy was picking up the starfish, one at a time, and flinging them back into the ocean. “Why are you doing that?” the man asked the boy as he got close enough to be heard. “Can’t you see that you’ll never be able to get all those starfish back into the water? What difference can you make when there are just too many?” The boy sighed as he picked up another starfish and tossed it into the water. Then
"HOW WRONG WE WOULD BE
to stop helping anyone because we cannot help everyone." as he watched it sink, he looked at the man, smiled, and said, “But I sure made a difference to that one.” The businessman paused… and he also began picking up starfish! True, one person cannot beat the odds. There will always be more people to reach than time or energy or commitment can provide. But the truth is that each one of us can touch a few. How wrong we would be to stop helping anyone because we cannot help everyone. You can make a difference. And because you can…you must. Count on the Lord to honour and multiply your best efforts, even though they may seem small. Last time I checked, He was still rewarding faithfulness. Charles R. Swindoll serves as the senior pastor-teacher of Stonebriar Community Church in Frisco, Texas.
On The Air
JUNE 16-AUGUST 3
Get to know the calmness of God's grace and glory. Can’t tune in on the radio? Listen to the broadcast online, anytime at insightforliving.ca
The
Perfect FATHER by annalisa patenaude
When I was a child I thought my dad was perfect.
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e could do no wrong. I mimicked him and followed him from place to place. As a teenager, I still expected my dad to have all the answers and to be the perfect father. But I discovered he didn’t and he wasn’t. Back then much of my identity was formed from my parents. I yearned for more quality time with my dad but he was often away for work. Although there was never a doubt in my mind he loved me, I resented him for his many absences. I struggled with insecurity about who I was and looked for someone to blame—my dad. Deep down I felt angry and lost. As a young adult I still felt a void and I began reading the Bible, searching for answers to my purpose and identity. Combing through Scripture, I was fascinated to learn what being created in God’s image means. The Bible not only reveals my true identity as a child of God, but the Sovereignty and perfect love of my heavenly Father. This was most evident to me in the Parable of the Prodigal Son. This story features a man who has two sons. The younger son runs off with his portion of his father’s estate and—while finding himself—he squanders it all. After some time he returns to his father, confessing his sin. Instead of blame and reprimand his father holds out his arms and celebrates the son’s return (Luke 15:11-32).
I connected with the son. The parable made me aware of my own imperfections and need for God’s grace and forgiveness. This realization helped me release my dad from the unfair blame I had placed on him. Then I began to learn and understand through Scripture what my identity in Christ is all about. I am, • Forgiven—Jesus’ death on a cross conquered sin and gave me hope of eternal life with Him (John 3:16) • Made new—By repentance and acceptance of Christ, I am free from sin. My purpose is to glorify God (Isaiah 43:7) • A gift, deeply loved—God made me special and desires a relationship with me (1 John 4:16) So often I feel lost like the son in the parable and find it difficult to grasp God’s perfect love for me. But He knows me, Annalisa, intimately and He knows every imperfection (Proverbs 8:17). Knowing this I imagine God has a similar reaction as the father in the parable when we live according to the purpose He designed for us saying, “But we had to celebrate and rejoice, for this brother of yours was dead and has begun to live, and was lost and has been found” (Luke 15:32). Annalisa Patenaude served as the development co-ordinator at Insight for Living Canada.
DRESS YO U R DREAMS IN DENIM by charles r. swindoll
ome collegians think manual labour is the president of Mexico…until they graduate. Suddenly, the light dawns. Reality frowns. And that sheltered, brainy, fair-skinned, squint-eyed scholar who has majored in medieval literature and minored in Latin comes of age. He experiences a strange sensation deep within his abdomen two weeks after framing his diploma. Hunger. Remarkable motivation accompanies this feeling. His attempts at finding employment prove futile. Those places that have an opening don't really need a guy with a master's in medieval lit. They can't even spell it. Who cares if a truck driver understands European poetry from the 12th century? Or what does it matter if the fella stocking the shelves at Safeway can give you the ninth letter in the Latin alphabet? When it comes to landing a job, most employers are notoriously pragmatic and unsophisticated. They are looking for people who have more than academic, grey wrinkles between their ears. They really couldn't care less about how much a guy or gal knows. What they want is someone who can put to use the knowledge that's been gained, whether the field is geology or accounting, engineering or plumbing, physics or barbering, journalism or welding. That doesn't just happen. People who are in great demand today are those who can see it in their imaginations—then pull it off. Those who can think—then follow through. Those who dress their daring dreams in practical denim work clothes. That takes a
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measure of gift, a pinch of skill, and a ton of discipline! Being practical requires that we traffic in reality, staying flexible at the intersections where stop-and-go lights flash. It also demands an understanding of others who are driving so as to avoid collisions. Another mark of practicality is a constant awareness of time. The life of a practical person is fairly uncomplicated and usually methodical. The practical mind would rather meet a deadline and settle for limited objectives than accomplish the maximum and be late.
Dreamers don't mix too well with pragmatists. They irritate each other when they rub together...yet both are necessary. The favourite expressions of a practical soul often begin with "what?" What does the job require? What do you expect of me? What is the deadline? What are the techniques? Or "how"… How does it work? How long will it take? How much does it cost? How fast can it go? Dreamers don't mix too well with pragmatists. They irritate each other when they rub together…yet both are necessary.
Take away the former and you've got a predictable and occasionally dull result. Remove the latter and you've got creative ideas without wheels, slick visions without handles…and you go broke trying to get it off the runway. The Bible is full of men and women who dreamed dreams and saw visions. But they didn't stop there. They had faith, they were people who saw the impossible, and yet their feet were planted on planet earth. Take Nehemiah. What a man! He had the task of rebuilding the stone wall around Jerusalem. He spent days thinking, praying, observing, dreaming, and planning. But was he ever practical! He organized a mob into work parties…he faced criticism realistically…he stayed at the task without putting out needless fires…he met deadlines…and he maintained the budget. Or take Abigail. What a woman! She was married to a first-class fink, Nabal by name, alias Archie Bunker. Because of his lack of wisdom, his greed, prejudice, and selfishness, he aroused the ire of his employees. They laid plans to kill him. Being a woman of faith, Abigail thought through the
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plot, prayed, and planned. Then she did a remarkable thing. She catered a meal to those hungry, angry men. Smart gal! Because of her practicality, Nabal's life was saved and an angry band of men was calmed and turned back. It is the practical person, writes Ralph Waldo Emerson, who becomes "a vein in times of terror that commands the admiration of the wisest." So true. Amazing thing about the practical person—he may not have the most fun or think the deepest thoughts, but he seldom goes hungry! Just now finishing school? Looking for a job? Is this the reason you're discouraged? Remember this—dreams are great and visions are fun. But in the final analysis, when the bills come due, they'll be paid by manual labour. Labour…hard work forged in the furnace of practicality. I encourage you…get with it. Be practical, that is. Excerpted from Come Before Winter and Share My Hope, Copyright © 1985, 1994 by Charles R. Swindoll, Inc. All rights reserved worldwide. Used by permission.
Charles R. Swindoll serves as the senior pastor-teacher of Stonebriar Community Church in Frisco, Texas.
TO EFFECTIVE FATHERING
image by tori nikkel
This article is designed to create a better understanding of effective fathering. For the next 30 days read the questions and allow them to spark deeper personal reflection and life change.
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cripture reveals God as an effective Father. It also shows us many examples of ineffective fathers. One of the results of ungodly, ineffective fathering is the negative impact on descendants. But by God’s grace the opposite is true: godly, effective fathers can have an impact lasting generations and ineffective fathers can become great fathers.
DAY 1
Read 1 John 3:1,18. God, the perfect Father, delights to lavish love on His children (see James 1:17). What acts of love can you lavish on your children?
DAY 2
Read Luke 15:20-23. What characteristics of an effective father does the Prodigal Son’s father display? How does this reflect the heart of your heavenly Father?
DAY 3
Read 1 John 1:9. God the Father is forgiving. What impact will it have on your children if you fail to forgive them when they have done wrong?
DAY 4
Read Psalm 68:4-5. God is a protective Father. What steps can you take to provide protection for your children in this day and age?
DAY 5
Read Isaiah 9:6. God is called everlasting Father. He is always available. What steps can you take to be more available to your children?
DAY 6
Read Genesis 34. Jacob did nothing when his daughter was raped. He also did nothing when his sons killed the rapist. What could Jacob have done instead?
DAY 7
Read Genesis 34:30-31. Rather than concern for his daughter or his sons’ behaviour, what was Jacob’s concern? How did his passivity affect his family?
DAY 8
Read 1 Samuel 2:12-35. When Eli’s sons were blasphemous and immoral, and since Eli feared them more than God, what did he do? What was the outcome?
DAY 9
Read 1 Samuel 2:29; 4:18. Eli also participated in the sin of his sons. How did that contribute to Eli’s passivity and ultimately his and his sons’ deaths?
DAY 10
Read 2 Samuel 13:1-22. David’s eldest son Amnon raped his halfsister Tamar. What did David do? What role did Absalom take on and why was it significant?
30 Days to Effective Fathering
DAY 11
Read 2 Samuel 13:23-25. David refused Absalom’s invitation to celebrate with him and his other sons. How do you think Absalom took David’s refusal to be involved with him?
DAY 12
Read 2 Samuel 13:26-39. Absalom killed Amnon and escaped to his grandfather’s, staying with him for three years. Again, David was passive. What should David have done?
DAY 13
Read 2 Samuel 14. Joab brought Absalom home but two years passed before David saw him. How did David’s passivity worsen Absalom’s resentment?
DAY 14
Read 2 Samuel 15:1-12, 16:21-22. Absalom’s resentment toward his passive father became rebellion and insult. How did David’s passivity toward injustice contribute to Absalom’s attitude?
DAY 15
Read 2 Samuel 18:1-18. Absalom was eventually killed while leading a rebellion, causing David to mourn. What lessons can you glean about the impact of passivity on a family?
DAY 16
Read Colossians 3:21; Ephesians 6:4. In these passages, fathers are warned not to provoke or exasperate their children. How does this happen? What should happen instead?
DAY 17
Read Deuteronomy 6:4-9. To fulfil these commands, how involved ought fathers be? What are some practical ways fathers can fulfil these commands in our day?
DAY 18
Read Job 1:4-5. In what ways do you see Job involved with his children? From Job’s example what is one way of keeping your family engaged?
DAY 19
Read James 1:19. How does this command apply to fathers with their children? When fathers don’t listen to their children, what message does it send?
DAY 20
Read Genesis 25:28; 37:1-35. Isaac favoured Esau while Rebekah favoured Jacob. Jacob then favoured Joseph. How does favouritism affect family unity?
TIP: Keep your Bible handy and refer to it as you read the questions
DAY 21
Read Genesis 37:3-8. How does favouritism affect the children who are not favoured? In Jacob’s family, what did favouritism lead to? How does this type of thing happen today?
DAY 22
Read James 2:9. How does James view favouritism? How can you prefer one child to another yet still be fair and not show favouritism?
DAY 23
Read Genesis 12:13; 26:7; 27:35. What is the connection between the deception practiced by Abraham and that of his descendants?
DAY 24
Read Genesis 27:41. What are some possible outcomes in a family when a father practices deception?
DAY 25
Read Genesis 29:14-35. Laban deceived Jacob and used his daughters as pawns for his own ends. What kind of family dynamic occurred because of his deception?
DAY 26
Read Proverbs 20:7. How does a father’s integrity result in blessing to his children? What steps can you take to strengthen your integrity?
DAY 27
Read Proverbs 22:6. What kind of direction does an effective father give his children? What might keep a father from giving good direction to his children?
DAY 28
Read Proverbs 19:18; Hebrews 12:7. Effective fathers strive to turn their children from evil through instruction and correction. How can you strengthen your instruction and correction?
DAY 29
Read Ephesians 4:1-3. How will obeying this verse help you be an effective father? What characteristics do you believe you need to develop?
DAY 30
Read 1 John 1:9. If you feel you have been an ineffective father what steps can you take today to become more effective?
30 Days to Effective Fathering
WHAT IF SOMEONE KICKS YOU WHEN YOU’RE DOWN? “God will always seem slower than we expect, especially when we’re going through unfair treatment!” - CHARLES R. SWINDOLL
In our day, everyone is ready to proclaim offence at one thing or another. Some are offended by certain words, while others are distressed by particular behaviours. Whatever the infraction, it had become almost faddish to exclaim, “I’m offended!” But what if someone hurts us? And what if the mistreatment comes when we’re already down? Because we’ve all gone through such harsh experiences, we should have no trouble understanding how David felt when he went through the misery of being pummelled with stones and cursed in public. Through this ugly scene found in 2 Samuel 16:5-14, we can learn much about how to endure mistreatment. By this time David was king but his sin led him on a downward spiral. When Shimei, a member of Saul’s clan, heard David was nearby, he took advantage of the opportunity to unleash some pent-up anger, calling David a butcher and a hellhound while hurtling stones at him (16:5-8 MSG). David had every reason to take offence. His men thought so too. Abishai, a man in David’s travelling party, responded by asking David if he could cut off Shimei’s head.
But David wasn’t offended. Instead, he told Abishai to back off and allow Shimei to continue saying, “Don’t bother with him; let him curse; he’s preaching God’s word to me. And who knows, maybe God will see the trouble I’m in today and exchange the curses for something good” (12). Here are four practical suggestions for those times when someone or something delivers a kick while you’re down. • First, ask God to give you a tougher hide. We need not be so sensitive • Second, remember God is ever aware even if He is silent. God is altogether sovereign • Third, rely on God’s grace when you deal with people like Shimei. God gives to us from His abundance of goodness and grace • Fourth, find comfort by resting in God’s mercy. When attacks come, we need somewhere to rest. We find an oasis in God’s mercy David’s response to a harsh critic provides a way forward for us as believers living in a culture that loves taking offence. It shows us how absorbing the hits of foolish people trumps reacting or retaliating.
“What If Someone Kicks You When You’re Down” is from Chuck Swindoll’s series What If...? You can stream this message online anytime at insightforliving.ca/audiolibrary.
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