HONORING YOUR

Honoring Your Parents on Your Special Day

By Michele Robert Poche

Maybe it’s because they were always at your basketball games, dance recitals and school plays. Maybe it’s because they were always there to pick you up when you were down. Or maybe it’s simply because they’re bankrolling your whole wedding. Like many brides and grooms, you may relish the opportunity to show their love and appreciation to their parents on their wedding days. We’ve put together a few ideas on how to do just that.

The obvious choice is to wear your mother’s dress.

MUSIC. Walk down the aisle to the same music your parents used at their wedding. Or at the reception, use the song they chose or even borrow “their song” for your first dance as a couple.

BOUQUET.

Incorporate a family heirloom or miniature framed photographs into your bouquet, or ask your florist to include flowers that can be nestled, but not fastened, into the bouquet. Then, as you walk down the aisle, surprise the mothers by presenting one to each of them.

ATTIRE. An obvious choice is to wear your mother’s dress. Other alternatives would be to wear her veil, garter, or jewelry. A swatch from her wedding dress or a garment belonging to your father could be incorporated into your wedding attire via a handkerchief or some other memento.

CAKE. Use the cake topper from your parents’ wedding to adorn your own cake, or decorate the cake table with frames of original photographs from your parents’ weddings.

SPEECH. Include a meaningful reading about mothers, parents, or family as part of your ceremony. Or prepare a well-worded toast to be given at the reception.

As with everything else, each wedding is different. In some cases, the couple will want to honor just the mothers. In others, they may choose to celebrate all four of their parents, or even stepparents or grandparents. Special dedications can also be made for loved ones who have passed on and are unable to share in the experience. In any event, this opportunity is one that you should make your own to ensure that your wedding is a memorable one for all in attendance.

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Deadlines & Details

By Michele Robert Poche

THERE ARE SO MANY THINGS TO REMEMBER WHEN PLANNING A WEDDING. TO ENSURE SUCCESS -- AND YOUR SANITY -- THE KEY IS ORGANIZATION. WE’VE COMPILED A DETAILED CHECKLIST THAT PAYS SPECIAL ATTENTION TO TIME-SENSITIVE DEADLINES, SO YOU CAN CREATE A FOOLPROOF CALENDAR AND TO-DO LIST.

12 months +

 Select date, time, and place. Then reserve venues!  Decide on wedding size and style.  Hire wedding consultant (if applicable) and create wedding website.  Shop for gown.  Begin guest list.

9-12 months

 Research honeymoon destinations.  Book musicians, DJ, florist, photographer, videographer, and limousines.  Order invitations.  Purchase gown and begin alterations.  Ask friends to be in wedding party and order bridesmaid dresses.

6-9 months

 Finalize guest list and send save-the-date cards.  Book appointments for hair, nails, and make-up.  Reserve attire for groom and groomsmen.  Order cake(s).  Purchase rings.

3-6 months

 Secure bridal accessories (such as shoes, jewelry, garter, and mementos)  Give musicians a list of songs you want them to play. (Or not play!)  Make food choices with venue.

2 months

 Mail invitations.

1 month

 Give photographer a list of pictures you want taken.

1 week

 Give final head count to reception venue.

The day before

 Hold rehearsal ceremony and dinner.  Deliver everything to site and work out any kinks.  Give marriage license to officiant.  Present gifts to wedding party, parents, and any other honored guests.

The day of

 Give rings and officiant’s fee to best man.  Designate liaison for photographer to ensure all necessary pictures are taken.  EXHALE!

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