issue8-inunison-2010 by USU Students' Association at Unitec

Issue 0 Is 07 7

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FE AT U R E S

Kris Teals Teaches You How To Improve Your Life

Campus Wars – Mt Albert VS. Waitakere

Get A Drink, It’s On Studylink

R E GU L AR S 04 E Ed dit itor oria ria ial 05 Le L ttteerrs rs 06 Prreesi sident dent de nt’s ’s Co ollum u n 07 7 Neew ws 07 7 Go oiing g Up/ p/G Go oiin ng Do own wn 09 News ews Ho ew Houn ou un nd 11 Carrto t on ons 11 C Ca am mp p pus us Fas us ashiion n 12 V Vox ox Pop ps 20 Wha hatt’’s On n? 32 Barrbi bie ie 32 S Sp plliintteerr 33 Wha hakaro haka ka aro rongo ng n go M Ma ai 34 Grra adu uat ate Prro ofi fillee 35 Wha h t To To Do 35 Ho orros osco op pees 36 Reev v vie iieew wss 38 Dri rink ink k Of Th Thee We Week Week k 38Re Reci Re cip pees Next Issue: The Obscure Issue, Out u 2ndd Aug ugus usst 20 2010 10 10 Edit Ed itor orria iall In Inqu quir ires es ph. h (09) 815 4321 ext 7927 79 7 in nun unis ison on@u @unite t c.ac.nz Adve Ad v rrttiissin ve singg In Inqu quir ires es ph. (09) 815 4321 eexxt 7384 7384 73 4 us usua sua u dv dver erti t sing ti n @unitec.ac.nz

Editor: Amanda Haxton Graphic Design: Mark Lovatt

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Contributors: SSuussaan nn nah Mac a Doona n ld ld, Al A an MacDonald, Dianne Ruth Rimmer, Joseph Harper, Barbie, e, SSpl p in pl inte teer, Ste ter, teph phan an niee Freeel elan and, d, New ws Hound, Jessie Colquhoun, Caitlin Dug ugg ga g n, Phi h lllippa Br hi Brow ow wn n..

IN UNISON

EDITORIAL

I WENT TO THE NORTH SHORE CAMPUS OF UNITEC the other day for the first time since becoming the editor of In Unison. Now, I know you are probably thinking to yourself: “What! There is a North Shore campus?” The answer is yes, there is. It’s hidden away in the depths of Takapuna amongst cute boutiques, juice bars, pubs and bistros. Those Takapuna students are lucky - all we have at Mt Albert 2010 Editor is KFC and Trinity of Silver- both pretty average. The Amanda Haxton Waitakere campus has an Gloria Jean’s and a Westfield. I’m not a fan on capitalist coffee chains, but I’d sure love a movie theatre next door. If you are now thinking: “What! There is a Waitakere campus?” Then I sincerely worry about you, did you think those shuttles fell into an abyss when they left the Mt Albert campus. Or did you think the drivers just took

“

Did you think those shuttles fell into an abyss when they left the Mt Albert campus?

“

them for a little joy ride? Even if you are right onto it and know about Waitakere, Mt Albert and Takapuna I bet you didn’t know about the fourth, Newmarket campus. Neither did I. It has got the best deal of all though, it’s on the fourth floor of Westfield 277, shopping central. It took me about three hours in the Editor’s job before I realised there is some major campus rivalry here at Unitec. Not just between North and West, but within each campus itself. Some people act like students from the Mt Albert Hub are of a different species to those down by Building One. Forever labelled by location,

LETTERS TO THE EDITOR

they are known only by the blanket term “Building One Student”. That doesn’t happen at the lovely little Takapuna campus. I doubt they bother to distinguish the students studying on level two from the students studying on level one. There’s something about the smallness that keeps everyone united. Mount Albert with its wide open spaces, sprawling wetlands, dominant pukeko population and inter-campus shuttles remains divided. The Waitakere campus, flung out in the West, is comparable to the annoying “little brother”. Some Mt Albert students seem to think it unreasonable that Waitakere expects the same services students at Mt Albert are entitled too. In turn Waitakere wants everything its older brother has, even if it’s not old enough or big enough for it yet. Sounds In The Sun, the major USU orientation event, is held at the Mount Albert campus. Some students feel that’s not fair to the other campuses. But with a crowd of over 8,000 where would you fit the event at Waitakere? To welcome students both old and new back to semester two this issue takes a look at the services, campuses and students across the whole of Unitec. While we point out differences it’s important to keep in mind all the heart-warming things you have in common. Where Waitakere has a courthouse, Mt Albert has The Mason Clinic. All campuses get free copies of In Unison every second Monday of term time. Students from all four campuses can also contribute to In Unison, as writers, photographers or cartoonists. See, you’re not so different after all. You may note this issue is extra large. Size XXL if you like. We have received some feedback and made some adjustments, like adding horoscopes, so you can find out your future - in advance! There is also practical advice on everyday student issues, like what to do if you have failed a paper. Your feedback is always welcome, send a letter to the Editor at inunison@unitec.ac.nz.

Letters should be 250 words or less. You MUST include your real name, phone number and address so we don’t get sued (we won’t print them if you don’t want us to). We won’t spell-check it, but we might edit, abridge, or decline it without explanation. Send letters to: inunison@unitec.ac.nz or, USU Students’ Association, Builing 180, 139 Carrington Road Auckland

IN UNISON

LETTERS DEAR AMANDA, Sometimes I feel that Unitec’s computer labss could co ld be transformed into student spaces that would only require tables, chairs and a reliable power supply to achieve the same effect. This realistic change can occur through the almighty computing power of netbooks. Yes, netbooks! All I’m suggesting, in a dull and incoherent fashion, is that the next time a Unitec student enrols, they could be given the option of tacking on a $400 charge to their tuition fees to cover the supply of a low cost netbook. Desktop computers may still be required for architecture and design students, but the rest of us could probably cope just fine with a shitty sub-laptop (if we don’t already own one). Granted, perhaps some of that surplus cash cluttering up Dr Ede’s office might need to be invested in upgrading the campus’ Wi-Fi network, and yet this whole netbook fetish does seem to have some flimsy rationality to it. Doesn’t it? Not saying much. Just saying. Hi Amanda, All my love, Sadly I have graduated from uni STEVE. and have to find new, exciting ways to procrastinate when I’m to The Editor, at work. I have discovered that Just wanted to let you know Facebook isn’t really accepted that publishing stories such use of time in the workspace as A Day At The Supermarket and since my screen is visible I Would Never Forget (May by everyone who walks into 10) being based on erotica the room it is plainly obvious of any kind is pretty vulgar when I’m quickly trying to get and totally made a mockery my fix. I use RSS feeds as a way of what it was claiming to procrastinate, hidden among to celebrate, particularly the industry related feeds are offensive was the graphic things like Perez Hilton or nature of the story. Phoenix whale blog. RSS feeds allow me Foundation is a fantastic to browse my favourite time NZ band who deserve to wasting sites in an email format have their music and talents so it looks like I’m busy working. exposed and celebrated, rather I would love if you could please than made fun of with “fan” add RSS feeds to the In Unison fiction. Keep your dirty dreams website so that I may read your to yourself thank you. magazine from my email box. NAME WITHHELD. Alternatively maybe some of your readers could suggest good A Day At The Supermarket I Would sites that I can get RSS feeds Never Forget, by Joseph Harper from as to occupy myself at my – was published on the In Unison otherwise boring job. website on May 10. Thanks

You could get vouchers, prizes, or tickets to gigs/movies/plays for your efforts. On top of these incentives, contributing to In Unison looks great in your CV or portfolio.

Revviewerrs, colu umnists, news writers, featurre writers s, carttoo onists, photographers and artis sts wanted. Tip-offs You can be a secretive news source if you know th hat something’s going down and thin ink it willl make a good story th hen gett in touch.

NAME WITHHELD.

Con ac Cont ct: t IIn Un Unis son 09)) 81 815 5 43 4321 1 ext 792 927 7 Ph (09 Email iinu uni niso son@ n@ @un nit itec ec c.a ac. c nz Orr pop iin: U O USU SU Offic SU fffic ices, Bu Buil ildi ding ng n g1 180 80,, 80 U ittec Un ec,M Mt Allb be ert c cam ampu pus. s.

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IN UNISON SON

PRESIDENT

WE COME BACK TO ALL RE--ENROLLE WEL ED STUDENTS

an nd welcome to the party for all those of o you with your t rtiary lives kicking into geaar for the first time this te seme m ster! May I be the first to o congratu ulate you on your decision to study here. Make the most o of the experience, m et as many new faces as yo me ou can and d if you have any trouble, my door is always op pen. I hope the returning studen nts amonggst you got t roug th u h your exams in one piiece. I know w personally that exams have a tendency to bring i outt th the worstt iin people; l you always forget that one thing you neeed, you know? Like k to bring your book to an open-bookk exam. Or - if ggiive v n a take-home ome exam - where you live live. Whether it’s a calculator, a ruler, your student ID or that coin you flip when you don’t know how to answer a particular true2010 President or-false question, there’s always something. And even Pete Hodkinson in those situations where you do have all the required equipment, there’s still a chance that you’ll get the day wrong or arrive an hour late. Or maybe that’s just me?

Well, regardless, I’m sure you all went hard and got the t results you deserve. If you feel the result wasn’t what yyou deserve, don’t forget that you can come and have a chaat with one of our USU Advocates about grade appeals. Or O if you know you didn’t do that well, and want to work on your study skills, it might be worth setting up an appointment with Unitec’s learning support centre Te Puna Ako. But all academic tom-foolerance aside, it’s great to see you back b k on campus. Unitec U it isn’t i ’t th the same without ith t ya! You’ve surely enjoyed the holidays and despite some labelling it a “study break” you probably managed to do all the things that make free time crazy and exciting; mini golf, Monopoly, Rubik’s Cubes and the like. And don’t think the excitement has to stop there! We have some wicked events rolling out for Re-orientation. Keep your eyes peeled for what’s on and get involved with everything you can!

STAYING HIP IN CHANGING TIMES: WORKING FULL-TIME AT THE USU, I don’t get holidays in the traditional student fashion anymore. But in order to not feel left out, I took a week’s leave during the break and went on a road-trip! It was absolute madness. Auckland to New Plymouth, to Wellington, to Taupo, to Rotorua, to Raglan and then back to Auckland in six days. Next time you get the chance, find a group of eight friends, rent a couple of caravans (around (arou $180 per person), chuck in $100 gas each, plan your route and hit the road! There aren’t many things more extreme than road road-trips, trips, get g in on the action!

ROSE (22) is a General Exec member in her third year of a Bachelor of Performing and Screen Arts, with a directing major at the Mt Albert campus.

GET TO KNOW YOUR

EXEC ROSE DAMON

What have you done for

the IP Officer and have begun work

Sweet, sour, or spicy and why?

students so far this year?

on an environmental sustainability

Spicy! I’m in Beijing at the moment

I have represented students

policy for the USU. But there is a

and there’s almost no other option!

on the Faculty of Creative

lot more I would like to do by the

Plus it makes eating an adventure.

Industries and Business Academic

end of the year! If any students

How long has this street vendor

Committee, encouraged student

would like to contribute to a new

had his pork out in the hot Beijing

representation, addressed

environment policy for the USU, or

sun today? Don’t know - too spicy

student concerns about Unitec’s

have any other issues, then I would

to tell! But we’ll find out tomorrow,

Intellectual Property Policy with

love to hear from them.

won’t we.

IN UNISON

NEWS

Female builder wins national competition

(proving girls really can do anything boys can)

Piako gourmet yoghurt. The mixed berry and passionfruit Haxton flavoursAmanda are the best. Available at NOSH and selected food retailers. Facebook friend culling. Cut back approximately one quarter of your Facebook friends. Life, and your news feed, will feel way less cluttered. Ria Van Dyke. She beat fellow contestants including Miss Auckland Caren Freeman to win Miss Universe New Zealand. Tip Top Marshmallow Icecream. They have finally mastered the Memphis Meltdown Rocky Road, and it’s awesome.

PHOTOS: UNITEC

Shanghai Lil’s. The 1930’s oriental themed bar, formally in Freeman’s Bay, closed last year and is now bigger and better, open in a new location in Parnell.

GOING UP A female Unitec student has taken out first place in a national apprentice competition, proving wrong those who told her building wasn’t a suitable career choice for girls. Kartika Mutselburg (31) was the first and only female apprentice to make the Queenstown national finals of the Third Year Apprentice Challenge last month. She beat all 12 male finalists at the Auckland Regional Finals before beating out the seven male contestants at the nationals. “It’s great to win, but it wouldn’t have mattered if it was against guys or girls,” she says. Currently studying in the second year of a Diploma of Carpentry, Kartika says building was something she always wanted to do. She previously worked in tourism and shipping, having been told building wasn’t a good career choice for her, that the physical challenge of building would be overwhelming. She says it is no different from pushing yourself that bit extra at the gym. Kartika says she has never been treated differently at Unitec because she was a

girl, but that being the only one gives her an added incentive to prove she’s capable. She would encourage other girls to do the course and get into the industry. “I love it.” The Third Year Apprentice Challenge was run by Certified Builders Association of New Zealand and Industry Training Associating Building and was open to all their apprentices. The prize was a three week Outward Bound trip. Kartika is employed by the Unitec Carpentry Apprentice Training Trust who work closely with the industry in finding work placements for the 40-plus Unitec apprentices under the scheme. Trust Manager, Joe Hede, says Kartika’s achievement is huge for Unitec but he is not surprised at what she’s achieved. “It’s quite rare to have a female come through our carpentry programmes but to have someone like Kartika stamp herself as one of the country’s top apprentices is a fantastic achievement. “She has such a great attitude towards what she wants to do. She’s not here to prove a point, she’s here because she genuinely wants to be a builder.”

GOING DOWN Fake plastic stick-on nipples. WTF? Sex And The City #2. It has none of the witty cynical ponderings of the original series and too many corny one-liners. The circus that was Heidi Montag and Spencer Pratt’s ridiculous marriage. The Hills stars have filled for a legal separation– thankfully - before they had the chance to start breeding. Cookies and Cream Primo. Tastes suspiciously like plain vanilla-flavoured milk if you ask us. Top Shop at The Department Store. The hype is embarrassing. Should the British low-rent brand, equivalent to Glassons, be treated like designer wear just because it’s from overseas?

IN UNISON NEWS

Sluttiest parts of the country revealed, Auckland in 9th place, Hamilton surprisingly not in first. By Caitlin Duggan

Karate Kid heads to championships By Amanda Haxton

Dedication and passion have paid off for one Unitec student who is being sponsored to compete internationally at the World University Sports Championships. Second year Bachelor of Sport student Jasmine Holland (19) is travelling to Montenegro this month where she will be competing in the karate championships. It is only the second time a Unitec student has been invited to compete at the prestigious week long event, and the first ever school of sport student to attend. Jasmine will be sponsored jointly by the USU Students’ Association and Unitec. The sponsorship will cover her airfares to the event and provide her with a uniform featuring the logos of both organisations. Jasmine says Unitec and USU have been “awesome” in supporting her. “I talked with Ray Masila, the sports co-ordinator, and from there he and [USU Student President] Pete Hodkinson approached the USU Executives and they agreed to support me on my journey.” USU Sports and Clubs co-ordinator Ray Masila says Jasmine’s selection shows she has reached a high level of achievement both nationally and internationally. “I’m proud and privileged to be associated with someone who’s going over there to represent USU and Unitec,” he says. “She is really committed and very focused; she has a passion for her sport.” “I’d like to see more [students] going over and, by the sounds of it, there will be more going over next year.” Students must be selected by their national body to compete in the championships. In 2009 Jasmine represented USU and Unitec at the national Uni Games, winning their first ever women’s gold medal. Following this success she was selected to represent New Zealand at the WKF Junior Champs last November in Morrocco.

A recent survey has revealed Auckland has the ninth highest rate of Chlamydia out of 14 District Health Board areas. Gisborne girls are more likely than the rest of the country to have a sexually transmitted infection says the latest Environmental Science and Research (ESR) study. ESR said yesterday that Gisborne has the highest overall rate of chlamydia with nearly 1400 cases reported between January and March this year. Chlamydia is the most common sexually transmitted infection in New Zealand with 7000 cases recorded across the country in the three months of the study. The second highest rate of chlamydia was in Rotorua. Three quarters of those who contracted chlamydia were aged 15-24. The highest rate was found to be in females aged 15 to 19 years with just under 5000 cases. There were fewer males recorded having the infection, with close to 1700 cases, which is less then a third of the cases reported by females. Males were most likely to contract between ages 20 to 24. These numbers do not represent every case, as some DHBs do not submit their information on sexually transmitted infections so some underestimations can occur.

For gonorrhoea the highest rate was again in Gisborne with over four times the number of cases than any other place in the country. The Ministry of Health says that New Zealand has a problem with sexually transmitted infections. “Rates of infection are many times higher than rates reported in Australia and the UK.” General Practitioner Gail Houng-Lee says the issue is that people do not know enough about chlamydia. “It often doesn’t have symptoms. People don’t realise they have it.” She agrees with other health specialists that condoms are the best way to stop contracting the infection. “Condoms are your best friends, they’re free from Family Planning and from your family GP. Just make sure you get the right size.” A warning for those of you that are heading to Rhythm and Vines this year watch out: don’t sleep with the locals. CHLAMYDIA FACT BOX: Chlamydia is the most common sexually transmitted infection in New Zealand. Three quarters of those who contract Chlamydia in NZ are aged 15-24. Chlamydia often does not have visible symptoms. Condoms are your best friend, and they are free from the Family Planning Association (FPA)..

Leading technology helps kittens By Amanda Haxton

Unitec is using the latest overseas technology to bring a simulated learning environment to veterinary students. The Simulated Veterinary Teaching Clinic was officially opened by New Zealand Veterinary Association (NZVA) Chief Executive Julie Hood on July 6. The clinic, in Unitec’s Department of Natural Sciences, is the first of its kind in New Zealand and has been equipped with the latest technology from Europe and the United States. The clinic is designed to simulate a real veterinarian clinic so that students can get hands on experience and students were also involved in the clinics “testing” process.

Head of the Department and Associate Dean of Research, Professor Natalie Waran, says the simulated clinic is a first in New Zealand and will give students confidence when entering a real veterinary clinic. “This simulated clinic is certainly very unique to Australasia and aids in our students’ learning capabilities by giving them the real-world learning experience that Unitec is well known for,” Natalie says. “It’s a very exciting time for us as a department and to be able to give our students an experience they’ve never had before is fantastic.”

IN UNISON NEWS

NEWS ROUND UP WITH THE

NEWS HOUND IN NEWS FROM THE US, scientists claim to have developed life saving undies. The men’s briefs have a waistband with an electronic biosensor which measures heart rate, blood pressure and other vital signs. Members of the US military are set to be the first recipients of these special jocks.

PHOTOS: UNITEC

IN SIMILAR UNDERWEAR RELATED NEWS, a former mayor of Lancashire, England has been sentenced to two years jail for stealing underwear from people’s homes. Police raided his house to find the underwear carefully sorted and labelled with the names of each of the women he had stolen them from.

Top: The BDA delegation at the Unitec Te Noho Kotahitanga Marae. Bottom Left: Athina Tsoulis presents a certiﬁcate to Beijing dancer, An Yushen.

Unitec plays host to world famous dancers By Amanda Haxton

Over the mid semester break Unitec played host to the world-famous Beijing Dance Academy. The Bejing Academy boasts Li Cunxin of Mao’s Last Dancer fame and Hollywood actress Zhang Ziyi (Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon, Memoirs of a Geisha, Rush Hour 2) among their past graduates. The delegation was welcomed with a traditional powhiri at Unitec’s Te Noho Kotahitanga Marae on their arrival. The Beijing delegation consisted of 29 dancers and administrators, including a former Unitec dance graduate Zhang Ping, who now teaches at the Beijing Dance Academy in China. An 18-minute performance by dancers

studying at Unitec’s Department of Performing and Screen Arts was incorporated into the programme on both nights. The Academy performed two shows in June at Takapuna’s Bruce Mason Centre. Unitec’s piece, called “Colony”, was choreographed by renowned New Zealand dance choreographer Michael Parmenter. Dance curriculum leader at Unitec Charene Griggs, says it is great to see a former student return to Unitec. Griggs says the visit builds on the close relationship Unitec already has with the Beijing Dance Academy through student exchange programmes.

IF YOU EVER GET INTO A FIGHT with some members of the Hell’s Angels, your best weapon of attack is not a puppy. In Bavaria, a German student provoked a fight with a group of motorcycle gang members by showing them the finger. He then hurled his puppy at them before escaping on a stolen bulldozer. The puppy assault worked on this occasion, but in the future this form of attack will no longer have the element of surprise. Hell’s Angels members worldwide are now alert and on the lookout for potential puppies that may be thrown at them. IT’S HARD TO DECIDE what to have for dinner when you have so many exotic options in your freezer. Like a tiger, several turtles, a monkey and the remains of a chimpanzee. The dead animals were found in a freezer during a police raid of a suburban home in England. Skulls of a baby seal and penguin, alongside lemurs, sparrowhawks, buzzards and owls were also found in the house during the raid. IN LOCAL FOOD NEWS, the ongoing saga of West Auckland’s ice-cream thieves continues. Four teenagers appeared in court over the theft of dozens of ice creams from the Ranui Food Bar and Takeaway Store. The store owner reportedly recognised them from another robbery on New Year’s Eve when they wore Santa hats. Apparently they just couldn’t wait another year for Christmas.

IN UNISON NEWS

Rate My y Course a success,, Big Brother definitely watching

By Amanda Haxton

The revolutionary Rate My Course program is proving popular and gaining attention from outside of Unitec just four months since its launch. Rate My Course, run by the USU Students’ Association, gives students the opportunity to anonymously provide feedback on their classes and programmes using a sliding scale rating from one to 100. Since launching on April 19, Rate My Course has seen 104 courses rated by students and the results are visible on the USU website. After a month the average course rating across the board was 7.4 out of 10. USU Students’ Association President Pete Hodkinson says the system is allowing students to have their feedback presented in a live forum for the first time in Unitec’s history. The Rate My Course section of the USU website has already received over 15,000 views since the program was introduced, says Hodkinson. “Not only are students interested in having their feedback presented but they are also interested in seeing what other students are saying and seeing that conversation taking place.” The feedback has been mostly positive and many initial concerns have been addressed, says Hodkinson. “There was a lot of initial concern from both staff and students about how the information would be used, how it was going to be presented and how confidential and anonymous the feedback would be.”

Measures were put in place to ensure the ratings are accurate, 10 per cent of any class must give a rating before results are visible. In line with legal responsibilities defamatory comments or comments that name lecturers are removed or edited to ensure they are constructive, rather than used for spam or to abuse staff members. Over 600 comments with constructive feedback have been posted online so far. Only four comments have been deemed too inappropriate to publish, with many more undergoing editing to remove offensive content or a lecturer’s name. “Students are learning how to present their feedback in a way that is going to be actionable, which would never have been possible in previous systems because they would put their comment down and it would just sort of disappear,” says Hodkinson. “They did not get their comments presented back to them and lectures did not have the opportunity to say ‘can you be a bit more specific’. That interaction is happening for the first time.” Hodkinson says many of the comments had to be moderated because they mentioned lecturers by name, but in a positive light. “Because we have this anonymity thing, where you can’t mention names, we have to remove these names just as much as ones that say so-and-so is a dickhead.” Hodkinson says the reaction from Unitec staff has been “a mixed bag” but better than expected.

“We expected a lot more hesitance and resistance from academic staff, initially. But through presentations we put through [Unitec’s] faculty academic committees we’ve gained some useful feedback.” “There are a number of lecturers who have been looking at their everyday ratings thinking ‘oh I had a 7.6 and now I’ve got an 8 out of 10’,” says Hodkinson. “The feedback that we have been getting from lecturers about how they are using the student feedback as a tool is really exciting.” Feedback from students has also been both good and bad. This is in part because of a lack of understanding about how the system works, says Hodkinson. “There were some questions [from students] around the information being publicly viewable and whether that would affect the quality of their degree." “If an employer sees a bad rating on a course that is up on the web are they going to use that as a tool in the employment process?” Hodkinson stresses that because Rate My Course is a live dynamic system students can go back and change their rating if improvements are made in the course. “There have been certain issues, but students are generally pretty happy,” he says.

HIGHEST RATED PAPERS AT UNITEC 1. Creative Practice 1 10.0/10 2. Playwriting - Full-length Play 9.9/10 3. Counselling in Practice One 9.9/10 HIGHEST RATED LECTURERS AT UNITEC 1. Daniel Stamp (Sport) 2. Susan White (Nursing) 3. Scott Wilson (Performing & Screen Arts)

IN UNISON EXTRAS

Fashion

CARTOON

WITH H STEPH PH

BY DIANNE RUTH RIMMER

Rachael Dryland Landscape Architecture

On Campus

Ashley Ware Graphic Design and Animation

Alex Oliver Graphic Design

BOND

Alan MacDonald

SHREK

TITANIC Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;m sick of all these vampire movies...

IN UNISON

VOX POPS PHOTOS: PHILLIPA BROWN

In Unison asked some students at Waitakere what they thought about their campus. 1.

Would it be more convenient if there was just one Unitec campus? What is the best thing about your campus? What is the worst thing about your campus? How many campuses do you think Unitec has?

Alie Al ieta ta

Siew

Diploma in Business Waitakere 1. No. 2. It’s close to home. 3. Needs more study rooms. 4. N/A.

Ba achelor of Nursing Wa Waitakere 1. No, three is good. 2. It is linked to the library so we can get the resources from the public library as well, and there’s a mall. 3. Nothing. 4. Three.

Grant Works at the reception at Student Central Waitakere 1. No, because Waitakere is unique, It’s different. Takapuna is unique as well, we have some things here that they don’t have at Mt Albert. 2. It’s unique and we’re more involved with Henderson and the community. 3. There’s not enough space. 4. Three that I know of, although someone said there was one in Newmarket…

Arth Just finished a course in Foundation Studies at the Mt Albert cam mpus and is about to start a Nursing course at the Waitaakere campus. Because of his unique viewpoint we also asked him which campus he thought was betteer. He said: ursse.” “Mt Albert of cours 1. If it was all in Mt Albert it would be much more convenient. 2. It is huge [at Mt Albert] quite spacious. This one [Waitakere] is quite small. 3. There’s not enough parking [at Mt Albert] honestly, I can’t find parking. 4. Three.

Kevin Bachelor of Nursing Waitakere 1. No. 2. It’s near my house, it’s like a five minute drive. 3 Nothing. 3. 4 Four, yeah I’d say four, I’m not sure though, 4. just guessing.

Imran

Saloite Diploma in Business Waitakere 1. No. 2. It’s nice and quiet and it’s close. 3. There are not enough study rooms like at the Mt Albert campus. 4. N/A.

Information Technology Mt Albert (just visiting the Waitakere campus) 1. I don’t think so, they are just different branches, here [Waitakere] they do nursing… and I don’t know what else, at Mt Albert they do all sorts. 2. There is a lot of space [at the Mt Albert campus]. 3. There is no worst thing about Mt Albert. 4. There is one here [Waitakere], Mt Albert, North Shore, so three? I think…

ANSWER: UNITEC HAS FOUR CAMPUSES

TERTIARY 2010 CHALLENGE FRIDAY 6TH AUGUST AT WAIKATO UNIVERSITY

One huge sports day with 16 tertiary institutes from around the north island, competing to win the Tertiary Challenge Shield.

WE NEED YOU TO REPRESENT USU AND UNITEC AND JOIN ONE OF OUR TEAMS:

FOOTBALL

TOUCH

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REGISTRATIONS CLOSE WEDNESDAY 28 JULY REGISTER AT USU RECEPTION OR EMAIL USUSPORT@UNITEC.AC.NZ usu

WWW.USU.CO.NZ

IN UNISON

MUSIC

P MONEY, A.K.A PETER WADAMS, ADAMS,, is one of the country’s

most talented music producers/DJ’s. His 2004 album Magic City went to d collaborations with rappers Scribe number two in the charts and featured g” featuring the number one hit by and Akon. His third album “Everything” his year. the same name was released earlier this

Q: You’re coming up to 10 active years in the music industry, how does it feel? It is great and a real blessing to continue to do what I love for a living. The privilege is not lost on me. It’s a pretty special thing.

Q: You are playing re-orientation shows at a fe few other campuses, how is a student gig different from other events? Students can get pretty ruckus at uni shows in my experience. I think it’s to do with cheap beer.

Q: What’s changed since you first got on the scene? What hasn’t changed? The whole internet has turned the record industry on its head. There are tonnes of new ways to interact with your audience and distribute music, which is real cool. But at the heart of it, real talent and good music still rules, which is great.

Q: How do you go about finding collaborators and artists to work with? I just work with people I like. If I dig your sound and ability and we get along, chances are we can work on something. omething. But usually I make my choices depending on what the track sounds like. It goes music first, voice and lyrics rics second in my world.

Q: What sort of response has your latest album “Everything” had so far? It’s been very positive. People are telling me they dig the variety of styles on the album. It’s good to have it out there and show the other sides to P Money. Q: There was a big gap between the release of “Everything” the single and the rest of the album. What have you been up to inbetween? When I released the “Everything” single I had no interest in making an album. I was content to just drop singles whenever I had a good song. Towards the middle of last year I started amassing a number of really good songs and fans were asking for the album so I took it upon myself to complete a record and put it out this year.

Q:: Who have you enjoyed working with most thus farr in your career? Anybody ybody who has mastered their craft and an can deliver a good consistently. People like Scribe, Vince od performance perfo Harder, David Dallas and PNC are solid in the studio every time. Q: What can we expect to see from you in the near future? More show-stopping DJ sets and solid singles. Hopefully I can maintain a long career producing and performing, this is what I love to do.

P Money will be playing at ReOrientaion 2010 alongside Kidz in Space, North Shore Pony Club and Computers Want Me Dead on Friday 30th July. Check out the Gig Guide on page 20 for more info. usu 19 JULY

30 JULY

MUSIC M

KIDZ IN SPACE (ASHLEY HUGHES, MAT AARON AND MATT FORM THE NORTH SHORE A PONY CLUB, a cross-genre, 80s disco, white and gold P trash t a dance group. They are busy guys, travelling all over tr the t e world and performing at festivals up and down New th Zealand. Amongst all that, they somehow manage to fit a Z Ze talk show into their busy schedule every Friday night at BFM called Ping Pong Pony. In Unison chatted to the guys about cal the best of the 80s and Aja Rock. Q: What was the inspiration behind your name? W It waas simply a case of manifest destiny... A.K.A “if you book them m they will come” sort of thing. Q: H How does the literal North Shore Pony Club feel about you u using it? We im magine they’d be a little confused and suspicious Q: Ho How did you meet and start the group? We botth responded to an ad in the TV Guide for auditions for Starrlight Express. We bonded over cigarettes and shared a lack of rroller-skating experience and shiny outfits. Q: Wha What are your favourite locations to play a gig at? Festivalss, they are the dope diggys, like Splore and the Big Day Out boileer circus. And changing rooms. Q: You’v You’ve seen international success on MTV UK, how was that experience? expe It was preetty funny, we made it over to Rio de Janeiro where we played at a wrap-party for the first Iron Man movie on a super yach ht with the Scissor Sisters. We also spent two months in Jam a aicaa writing our forthcoming album with local gang members. R.I.P R Chucky L. Q: Any pla plans to relocate to the UK now, or you staying put on the Sh Shore? We are in pre-production meetings with Prime TV for a special live DJ set on Takapuna Beach on the first Monday of summer. We are going to unite every unemployed person in the country and get them dancing on the sand. So yeah, North Shore all the way. Q: You pay homage to the 80s a lot. What are your favourite aspects of the decade? Jerry curls, giant cell phones, Where’s The Beef? Bill Cosby sweaters and Reebok Pumps. Q: What can we expect to see from you in the near future? An album, a couple of tight music videos, more girls on the dance floor and a workout DVD with Aja Rock, naked.

NESHAT AND JOSH FOUNTAIN) landed on the earthly music scene at the 2009 Big Day Out and have been putting their intergalactic sound out on NZ radio waves ever since, recently taking out the My Space Peoples Choice Award for best dance/elektronica group. In Unison chatted to the group about the band’s reclusive behaviour and their impractical spaceship. Q: Which planets do Kidz In Space draw their musical inspiration from? We usually just muck about in the studio doing nothing until all the planets align and then there’s a mad rush for about 30 minutes when everything just falls into place. Then it’s back to square one. Pluto was a huge inspiration for us, but unfortunately it’s no longer considered a planet. Q: Can you describe your spaceship? It’s pretty much just a balloon with a triple seater bicycle inside. We take turns being at the front. It’s not very practical. Q: Why haven’t you been showing your faces in your clips? Is there some flesh-eating skin condition you’re hiding? Yes there is and it is a sensitive issue. Q: You’ve previously chosen to conduct interviews through a spokesperson rather than in person. Why is that? Well at first conducting the interviews this way was to us a lot more interesting and fun, and that is why we chose to do it. But, after finding out how hard it was to pull it off at every interview, we pulled the plug on it. It became a mission with the lighting, suits and everything, and was less fun and more of a hassle. It was fun collaborating with the media in pulling those interviews off though. Q: You launched the band at the Big Day Out, will you be back for a third year in 2011? Hopefully! We love the Big Day Out and we definitely have a soft spot for it. It’s where we played our first ever Kidz In Space gig! Q: Where are your favourite locations to play a gig? We had an awesome time down in Dunedin. The gig was full of technical difficulties and faults but no one seemed to care. They’re a different breed down there. Big Day Out is also great because you get to watch all the other bands for free! Q: What can we expect to see from you in the near future? We’ve just shot the video for our first single “Ghost” which hopefully will be out by the time this goes to print. We’re putting the finishing touches on the album and planning a New Zealand wide tour. It’s going to be a big year.

IN UNISON

FEATURE

HOW DID UNITEC C FU FUNCTION UNCTION W WITHOUT ITHOUT T THE HE A ANGELIC NGELIC R RAY AY OF OF LIGHT THAT IS CHRIS RIS P PEEL? EEL? W Who ho knew knew that that Unitec Unitec h had ad a llibrary! ibrar y! Or Or that that you you could get a student loan while stud studying! We are hoping he’ll uss h how use dying! W ea re h oping h e’ll tteach each u ow tto ou se tthe he bathroom soon. We reckon on well overdue. While n a tutorial tutoria al vvideo ideo o n tthat hat iiss w ell o verdue. W hille we wait for such a video to be commissioned Unison’s delinquent Kris Teals presents a ioned In Uni iso on’s rresident esident d elinquent K special written report on how Unitec possibly, get arrested). w to get by at Un nitec ((and and p BY JOSEPH HARPER ILLUSTRATION BY SUSANNAH MACDONALD D

Disclaimer: This is a work of ﬁction and in no way does USU or In Unison condone or encourage you to follow these suggestions.

Woah woah woah! First things first. Do you know how to read? It’s pretty easy. Just learn what words are, then open your eyes and allow your brain to string the ideas and concepts together. Easy as pie right? Man, Unitec rocks. Now that we’ve got that little formality out of the way, we can really get cooking. Hi I’m Kris Teals. You probably recognise me as the

IN UNISON FEATURE

“

can put in your bag and take home and use? YES! As if that wasn’t enough, if you look around enough, you’ll crack onto some other sweet discoveries. Air freshener, liquid hand soap, tissues. You could even start a collection of really, really long hand towels by unravelling one of those handtowel stations. Same goes for rubbish bags. Just have a look at the bottom of your nearest bin. That’s where the cleaners normally store those bad boys.

PRO TIP #2:

MAMA UNITEC HAS GOT YOUR MILKY DELIGHTS COVERED!

Hungry? Thirsty? I know what it’s like. It’s pretty impossible to afford real-life groceries when you’re a student ay? What with the savage price of beer and the savage price of broadband internet bills. Don’t fret! There’s no need to starve it up. I’ve got a well stocked pantry for you. A little place I like to call the staff

you get the white bread. Don’t want to get stuck with that grain shit!

PRO TIP #3:

BETTER LIVING/TRADE ME STOCKS!

Cold? No wonder. It’s winter. And your house is poorly insulated and leaky and falling apart. You can’t really afford duvets or sleeping bags to walk around in. You can’t even afford pens and books and protractors and laptops. Sure, you got the $1000 course-related costs cash. But obviously you had to use that to buy an Xbox. Duh. I know what you’re thinking, “surely there’s no way Kris Teals can help me out with my home. Surely not!” Well you’re wrong! Ever noticed that occasionally the classrooms at Unitec are real warm? That’s because some of them have little fan/bar heaters in them. And guess what? They aren’t even secured to the floor! You can just pick them up, put them in your Honda Civic, and drive them home.

Y o u c ou uld even start a c o l l e ctiion of really, r e a lly lo ong hand towels

by unraveling one of those hand-towel stations.

PRO TIP #1:

DO DON O ’T BE A TOILET-HEAD!

Sm Smash some toiletries! It’s a scientifically proven fact act that all students use the toilet. ilet. So Some may claim to be immune mune tto the power of urinary function but these people are full of shit functi (not literally). This home truth can be a real bummer. Toilet paper is expensive enough for regular people, let alone students who have to spend all of their hard earned student allowance on rent and beer/ricadonna champagne. Lucky for you, Kris Teals has got your back. You never have to pay for toilet paper again! I know what you’re thinking, “sure Kris, but then I have to nail my number ones/twos on campus all the time!” Not true. Next time you’re in the bathroom at Unitec, have a poke around. Check out those cupboards. Oh what’s that? Heaps of free toilet paper which you

room. Here’s H the scheme, the best time to rock in is between 9am and 12pm. That’s when en most mo staff are “teaching” (more like lecturing). Just roll on in and have lik a peek in the fridge. What you’ll find is an unbelievable amount of milk! Mostly light-blue (bastard hybrid of green and real blue) but beggars can’t be choosers. Seriously, there’s so much milk. I’m sure they end up throwing most of it out anyway. You’d be doing your institution a disservice if you didn’t take it. While you’re in there, you may as well take a squiz at the other delights on offer. You’re sure to uncover some teabags (mean) some freeze-dried coffee (meaner) and possibly a sandwich (meanest). Not enough? You could always camp out overnight outside one of the cafes. Then when the evil bread company drops off their early morning bread delivery, you could pinch a loaf for yourself and one for your flat. Word of warning: make sure

“

handsome/big lead ac actor/classic comedy bro from such You Tub be sensations as, “Kris Teals’ Adventuress at Carrington’s” “Kris Teals Adventures at a Long Black Cafe” and of course, my finest hour, “Kris Teals Adventures on the Unitec U Shuttle”. Wee’ve had a lot of laughs hs. But unfortunatelyy for some stud udents those brief and fleeting moments of o joy are ab bou out the on o ly times they exp xperience haapp pines ess. Why? Simple. Bein ng a student i rea is e ll ea l y, really la l me. I know ho ow it is. I’m a 19 9-yyea earr ol o d second-year accou unting stud st uden ud nt af a terr all. I kno n w what it’s ’s like to liive in to t tal sq qualor and d be really cold c b ca be c us u e yo you’re poor and your housse is aw wfu ul. Not beiing able to o go see a no ormal do oct c or or, bu but than a kf an kfullly being able to o afford th he Un U ittec doc o to tor (jjust $5)! Itt’s ’ bec ecau use I know all abou ut these trou tr ou ublless thaat II’’m heere today tippin’ it up u and an d li l vi v n’ n it up up whi hile you ou’re st studyin’ it up p. He H re are my pr pro o ti t ps on ho h w to get by wiith t som o e of o Uni n te tec’ c’s untaapped c’ e resources es.

I’ve currently got five fan heaters in my bedroom. It’s like surround sound. But with hotness. That’s not the only thing you can take home. Ever realised the computers you use at Unitec are just regular computers? That’s because they are! Why not round up a few keyboards and a bag full of mice? Or swipe a dozen computer chairs? Or, if you’re feeling really adventurous, you could probably get one of the projectors down from the lecture halls. You can then sell it all on Trade Me for a massive 100 per cent profit! Life rocks that way. That’s not all. Just get creative. Keep your eyes open and you’ll uncover a whole swag-load of possibilities. Unitec is basically a treasure chest. And you’re basically a cool pirate. You just need to start plundering. Until next time, I’ve been Kris Teals. Stay coooooooool!

IN UNISON

MUSIC COMPUTERS WANT ME DEAD

are a two-piece electro-synth pop band consisting of Sam Harvey and Damien Daniels. These guyys are being billed as the next big Ne ew We Zealand band since their song “W Walk In Circles” featured on the C4 promo advertisements. The duo will be pe erforming during re-orientation and sharing th heir “erotic pizza music” with Unitec students.

Q: How did you two meet and start working together? Damien Daniels: I first saw Sam at an office Christmas party, he had massive long black Goth dreads and was wearing a Nine Inch Nails t-shirt. It kind of stood out from the Santa hats and elf costumes. Sam Harvey: Damien introduced himself and we instantly started talking about music, 20 minutes later we ditched the party to go play each other demos in my car. Q: You’ve described your sound as “erotic pizza”. Can you give a detailed description of what erotic pizza sounds like for those readers who don’t know? Damien Daniels: Well, the logical answer here would be, Computers want it sounds like Computers Want Me Dead and thus begins me Dead will be the infinite paradox. playing at ReSam Harvey: I want to say cheesy, but that’d be about the Orientaion 2010 worst way to describe our music! We’re an Electro Synth alongside P Money, Pop duo, with various other genres thrown into the mix Kidz in Space and that change track to track. North Shore Pony Club on Friday 30th July. Check out the Gig Guide on page 20 for more info. usu

Q: Sam, you’ve been in Punk and Goth bands before, what prompted the genre change into electro-synth? Sam Harvey: A lot of the industrial Goth music I listened to was synth based anyway, so it was a natural evolution to follow an electronic path. Plus, a lot of synth artists sprang up in the 80s when I was a kid, so there’s a nostalgic push that way, which is why I particularly love the vintage synth sound too.

Q: You’ve been in the recent C4 Promo ads, how has that raised your profile? Sam Harvey: Yeah we’ve had a huge response to our debut track “We Walk In Circles” last year, and again now for the new track “In Your Blood”. It’s been really great to have that support from day one. All publicity is good publicity for sure! Damien Daniels: Except for that time we were on Police Ten 7... Err, moving on.

COMPUTERS

Q: The first big question is: Why do computers want you dead? Sam Harvey: If you’ve ever seen the movie Terminator, you’ll already know why... But to cu ut a long story short, I’m Arnold Schwarzenegger’s illegittimate child. Damien Daniels: Or, it could be thaat I got my Gmail password wrong three times in a ro ow the other day, so naturally we must all be exterminaated now.

Q: What are your favourite locations to play gigs? Damien Daniels: We just did a small tour with The Naked & Famous and Kids of 88 and played at the San Francisco Bath House in Wellington. I don’t know what it is, but there’s something quintessentially rock ‘n’ roll about the venue. The sound, the space, the grime, it’s just a solid set up to see live acts... and the green room is littered with, just the most amazing artwork. Sam Harvey: Anywhere there’s a huge sound system. The louder it is the more fun it is performing and the bigger the crowds. Q: What can we expect to see from you in the near future? Sam Harvey: We’re opening for 30 Seconds To Mars in August and we’ll be touring across New Zealand and Australia over summer.

$20 FOR DISCOUNTS AT ALL THESE PLACES??? making it cheaper to be a student

Black and White

Burger King

Bond and Bond

C Compass Communications

Contact

Contacts 2 Go

Dial A Cab

Domino’s Pizza

Fatso

FlatAccount.com

Interislander

Jeanswest

Liquor King

Mr Vintage

Vision Plan

Absolute Catering

Auto Clinic

Automax

EZ Rentals

Paradice Ice Skating

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Waiwera Inﬁnity

StudentCard is available online at www.studentcard.co.nz

IN UNISON

usu

WHATS ON? WEEK ONE

MONDAY 19TH USU FREE BBQ AT WAITAKERE CAMPUS Level 1 Courtyard - 12:30pm

USU FREE BBQ AT MT ALBERT CAMPUS The Hub - 12:30pm

WEEK TWO

Usu Free

MT ALBERT CAMPUS ORIENTATION Red Lecture Theatre

TUESDAY 20TH USU FREE BBQ AT WAITAKERE CAMPUS Level 1 Courtyard - 12:30pm

THURSDAY 22ND USU FREE BBQ AT MT ALBERT CAMPUS

MONDAY 26THH

USU FREE GAMING DAY

ILDING 1 USU FREE SOUP KITCHEN AT BUILDING

USU FREE BBQ AT MT ALBERT CAMPUS

The Hub - 12:30pm

MARKET DAY AT THE HUB

Uni Lounge, The Hub. 12 – 4:30pm

The Hub - 12:30pm

WEDNESDAY 21ST USU FREE BBQ AT WAITAKERE CAMPUS Level 1 Courtyard - 12:30pm

USU FREE BBQ AT MT ALBERT CAMPUS The Hub - 12:30pm

USU POOL COMPETITION

Uni Lounge, The Hub - 12pm Register at USU Reception

8TH - 29TH JULY

12:30pm

USU TABLE

Gold Theatre, The Hub 5.30pm Film: Crazy Heart

FRIDAY 23RD USU FREE BBQ AT TAKAPUNA CAMPUS 12:30pm

TAKAPUNA CAMPUS ORIENTATION

THURSDAY 8TH- SUNDAY 25TH JULY International film festival Various times and locations See www.nzff.co.nz Tickets from Ticketek

USU HYP GUY CAT Carringt Tickets $

USU FREE FILM NIGHT

OTHER

EVENTS

WEDN W EDN ED DN

TUESDAY 27TH USU FREE BBQ AT WAITAKERE CAMPUS Level 1 Courtyard - 12:30pm

MARKET DAY AT THE HUB

Hot dogs, Doughnuts, Clothing & Jewellry stalls.

20TH JULY, 27TH JULY AND 3RD AUGUST Unitec Presents: Forum of the Future: Supercity: Win or Lose? Come and share your opinion, ask some questions or find out more about the Supercity at a series of live debates. Speakers include, among others, Waitakere Mayor Bob Harvey and John Banks Mayor of Auckland. Unitec Theatre, Building 6, Mt Albert Drinks and nibbles from 5pm, debate starts at 5.30pm.

Uni Loun 12pm Register a

IN UNISON WHATS ON?

19 JULY

30 JULY

FRIDAY 30TH

DNESDAY D NESD 2 28

HYPNOTIST SHOW – CATER

ington’s - 7pm, ets $5 from USU Reception

TABLE TENNIS TOURNAMENT

Lounge, The Hub m ster at USU Reception

FRIDAY 23RD JULY Surf Friends - Single Release Party Whammy Bar St Kevin’s Arcade Karangahape Road From 9pm. Door sales only

UUSU SU PPRESENTS: RESENTS:

P-MONEY COMPUTERS WANT ME DEAD KIDZ IN SPACE NORTH SHORE PONY CLUB 8pm, Building 202, Gate 1, Mt Albert Campus. Student tickets $10 from USU Reception or www.undertheradar.co.nz

SATURDAY 24TH – SUNDAY 25TH JULY Speedshow ASB Showgrounds 217 Greenlane West, Epsom 9am- 6pm Tickets $17 from Tiketek or at the door

TUESDAY 27TH- SATURDAY 31ST OF JULY Play: Introducing Anna The Basement Theatre in Lower Greys Ave. Adults$18.00 Students $15.00 all tickets are $10.00 on Thursday. Email introducinganna2010@gmail.com for tickets Door sales available all nights. See more about this play on page 35

IN UNISON

FEATURE

IT’S ON STUDYLINK BY JESSIE COLQUHOUN AND AMANDA HAXTON

THREE YEARS OF STUDY AND $15,000 WORTH OF LIVING COSTS - ALL OF IT SPENT ON DRINKS AT THE PUB. It’s the stereotypical student spending we’ve all heard about. Every student seems to know someone who frittered away their allowance, or someone else who claimed living costs and earned interest at the Government’s expense. With student debt at a record high, In Unison asked students of all ages from around Auckland to shed some light on what they really spend their StudyLink money on.

IN UNISON FEATURE

THE SPENDER: ROWS OF NEATLY PRESSED DESIGNER CLOTHES hang in Serena McCloud’s* closet

in her parent’s waterfront home in West Auckland. Parked outside is the late model Volkswagen polo she uses to ferry herself to swanky bars, an exclusive gym and into town and back. After graduating from AUT University she bought a $500 Deadly Ponies designer handbag with her first pay, as a “treat”. Serena may be the polar opposite of a stereotypical student. After a two-year OE to London, she returned home and enrolled in a postgraduate diploma. Having just turned 24 she qualified for the mature student allowance and got $150 a week free from the Government. On top of this, she was a nanny for two wealthy Remuera families, earning $17 an hour, under the table. Living with her parents, Serena says she was fortunate that she paid nothing on rent, board, food or bills. “I would have to pay for my clothes and social outings”.

THE SAVER: IN EPSOM, AT JUST 18, RACHEL JAMES’*

passport is decorated on almost every page. Each stamp tells the story of an overseas trip: to San Francisco, around the Pacific Islands, Los Angeles, Singapore, Portugal, and to Australia more times than she can count. Unlike Serena, who keeps her money where she can see it - hung up in her closet - Rachel chose to work up to 20 hours a week part time. But Rachel still gets living costs from the Government, which go promptly into a high interest earning savings account that she can’t touch. The idea is that the interest she earns on $165 per week will eventually pay off her student loan Rachel got the idea from her older sister, who claimed the $150 a week in living costs for three years of study. At the height of interest rates she was earning almost $100 a month on the lump sum she kept in a separate bank account.

THE MONEY WAS SPENT ON CLOTHES,

M OSTLY DESIGNER DRESSES “The money was spent on clothes, mostly designer dresses that I would lay-by and pay off week by week. It would also go on petrol, on which I would spend at least $50 a week, because I live in West Auckland and would travel into the city everyday. I also spent money on lunches, sushi, dinners with friends, drinks, movies, a gym membership, social outings and general living.” In 2009 the age at which StudyLink deemed you a “mature” student decreased by one year, applying to students 24 and over. If she studied a year earlier Serena’s parents’ high income would have made her ineligible for the allowance. Instead, she became just one of the many students whose frivolity contributes to the highest ever government spending on allowances in almost 20 years. Ministry of Education figures released last month show that the number of allowance recipients jumped by 26 per cent between 2008 and 2009, compared to five per cent each year between 2006 and 2008.

THE PARENT: THE LIVES OF THESE TWO STUDENTS

could not be more different to that of 41-year-old Mathew Ryan*. The father of three went back to studying in his mid thirties at Unitec. Unlike Rachel and Serena, who had copious amounts of disposable income, he struggled to make ends meet. Mathew was eligible for the over-24 allowance but he also earned up to $1000 a week under the table - a fact he didn’t disclose to StudyLink: “It’s the only way you can survive,” he says. A StudyLink spokesperson from the Ministry of Social Development says there are no specific restrictions relating to the number of hours someone can work while receiving a student allowance. “There are however limits to the amount a student can earn. This is because the student allowance is an income tested payment. If the student obtains funding through deliberately making false

The Student of Separated Parents: Lisa Kim, 20 Unitec Institute of Technology Lives at home with her mother and receives the student allowance. Doesn’t pay rent or board but helps out with expenses at home. The Struggler: Karen Miller, 22 AUT and Massey Universities Moved to Auckland from Mount Maunganui to study. Struggled to make ends meet on the student allowance without any financial support from her parents. The Drinker: Dillon McGill, 24 AUT University Received two $1000 scholarships as well as $50 a week in living costs and spent it all on alcohol. Wishes he had asked for the full $150 so he could have bought more drinks. The Saver: Rachel James, 18 Auckland University Lives in Epsom with her parents but receives living costs which she puts in a savings account and earns interest off. The Spender: Serena McCloud, 25 Auckland and AUT Universities Received the over-24 student allowance, lived at home rent free and worked part time under the table. The Parent: Mathew Ryan, 41 Unitec Institute of Technology A father of three who received the over-24 student allowance but had to work nights under the table to make ends meet.

IN UNISON FEATURE

declarations about their circumstances, however, that is fraud. The Ministry of Social Development has a zero tolerance policy to fraud. In every case where there is planned or deliberate fraud, we will prosecute.” This means Mathew and Serena, who worked under the table, committed fraud. And got away with it. Not everyone is so lucky. In the past 12 months The Ministry has successfully brought cases against 356 students who were found to have abused the student loan and student allowance schemes. The Ministry Spokesperson says a false statement or claim is a breach of the student loan contract and can result in restrictions on future access to student loan payments. “Serious cases may be referred to the police for prosecution.”

IN THE PAST 12 MONTHS

THE MINISTRY HAS SUCCESSFULLY BROUGHT CASES AGAINST 356 STUDENTS WHO WERE FOUND TO HAVE ABUSED THE STUDENT LOAN AND STUDENT ALLOWANCE SCHEMES.

Getting caught was a risk Mathew knowingly took. He says there’s no way he would have been able to support his children on just his partner’s income, the allowance, and the approximately 10 hours a week of part time work StudyLink allows. “Without the allowance I would have needed to find part time work, not just one but maybe two or three jobs. I see a lot of people break away from their studies because they can’t afford to live.”

THE STRUGGLER: THE INEQUALITIES BETWEEN STUDENTS

are impossible to miss. How can Serena and Mathew be eligible for the same amount of money from StudyLink simply because they are both older than 24? It hardly seems fair. Serena is the first to admit she didn’t need the allowance to live. “I was lucky and had a very generous family who looked after all those things so I didn’t have to worry about them. I didn’t have to pay any food or rent costs. If I did have to factor those into my finances then yes, I think I definitely would have needed the money to survive.” It’s this inequality that has recent

graduate Karen Miller* raging mad. The bright 22-year-old studied at AUT University and Massey University - a long way from her home in Mount Maunganui. When Karen swapped her trusty jandals for textbooks, she never thought studying and trying to earn a living would be so hard. It frustrates her that someone like Serena could be a student and afford designer dresses while she struggled to pay the rent. Because her parents earn under the threshold of eligibility, Karen received the student allowance; between $173 and $195 per week for four years that she doesn’t have to pay back. She was able to get the full allowance because she lived away from home, but students still living with their parents can receive a slightly smaller sum if they meet the criteria. Karen’s parents were unable to support her financially in any way during her four years of study, so the majority of her allowance was spent putting a roof over her head. “Most of it went on rent because rent in Auckland is really expensive. The rest of it went on power and water and things like that. I might have had like $20 left over occasionally which was generally for food, course costs or petrol.” She worked the maximum of around 10 hours a week and most of this money went to resources for her design degree, which has very high course costs. Unlike Mathew and Serena, Karen didn’t escape StudyLink’s watchful eye. She says whenever there was the slightest discrepancy with her work hours they would hassle her. “If you go over, or if they don’t know that you’re working, or if there is any sort of minor discrepancy in what you’re earning from IRD and what you told StudyLink, then they hassle you. Hassle the shit out of you.” How can a few extra dollars a week cause so much concern for StudyLink while Rick’s $1000 weekly earnings went unnoticed? The Ministry Spokesperson says it’s because only randomly selected applications require evidence of all income and any subsequent income changes. “The Ministry of Social Development has a comprehensive suite of data matches with other agencies to detect non compliance and fraud including: Inland Revenue, Customs, Housing New Zealand, the Department of Internal Affairs and the Department of Corrections. Where a student is matched as having circumstances other than those

SPOTLIGHT ON STUDYLINK New Zealand provides student loans and allowances to tertiary students who satisfy the funding criteria. Full-time students can claim loans for both fees and living costs while part-time students can only claim training institution fees. A non-refundable meanstested student allowance for living expenses can be claimed by students who are over 24-years-old or whose parents have a low income. From 2001, all full-time students have been exempt from interest while studying.

The total student debt reached $10 billion in 2008 and is growing by $1 billion annually. The average amount borrowed by a student loan recipient for fees in the first quarter of 2010 was $4,771 - this is a six per cent increase on the average in the first quarter of 2009 ($4,522). The average amount borrowed by a student loan recipient for living costs in the first quarter of 2010 was $762, a five per cent increase on the average amount in the first quarter of 2009 ($724). The increased number of loan recipients and an increase in average borrowing has resulted in total loan drawings increasing by 20 per cent in comparison with the same quarter in 2009.

IN NU UNISON N SO NI O N FEATURE FE F EA AT T UR UR E

they have declared to StudyLink, this is investigated and appropriate action taken.” It’s no surprise then that Karen, who was legitimately eligible for the allowance, feels annoyed that her income was constantly scrutinised when she genuinely needed it to get by. She knows people like Serena who received the allowance and bought designer clothes and those like Rachel who invested StudyLink’s money. Both make her really “pissed off ”. “I think the aim of the student allowance is to help people whose parents can’t help them when they are studying. If you don’t need help then you shouldn’t really be taking it and StudyLink shouldn’t really be giving it to you either.” “When other people don’t even need it and rip-off the system it’s frustrating to people who actually genuinely need it. And there’s the risk that those people ruin it for everyone and people who need it might not be able to get it one day.” StudyLink agree that the money should be used for the purpose for which it was intended. However, “it is up to individual students to decide exactly how they use the funding provided.” Because students who receive the student allowance are income tested, The Ministry believes it is “likely” that their financial circumstances would dictate that this money be spent as intended. However, there remain discrepancies with how the money is spent, even between siblings whose parents have the same income. Karen’s younger brother was also eligible for the student allowance but chose to study in Hamilton. “Hamilton is a really cheap city to live in so he spent around half his allowance on what I spent it on - living - and then the other half on whatever he wanted to do, going out, course costs and more than anything, booze.” Alcohol and students seem to go hand in hand, at least if you listen to the mainstream media. You could argue it’s as big a part of the student lifestyle as last minute cramming sessions for exams. As a mature student this is something Mathew didn’t really get involved with. He says he never “drank away” his student allowance, unlike many students he knew. “Some people really need [the allowance] and then other people throw it away, spending it like that. It’s like ‘What the hell?’ What a waste!”

HE RECEIVED $50 A WEEK IN LIVING COSTS AND TWO $1000 GRANTS WHICH WERE SUPPOSED TO GO TOWARDS HIS STUDENT LOAN.

HE SPENT IT ALL ON ALCOHOL. THE DRINKER: 24-YEAR-OLD DILLON MCGILL* is unsure

whether his three years of university could be seen as a waste. He lived at home with his parents in Manuwera while studying for a communications degree at AUT University. He received $50 a week in living costs and two $1000 grants which were supposed to go towards his student loan. He spent it all on alcohol. When he finished studying, Dillon had a $20,000 student loan and, even three years after graduation, estimates it will take another nine years to pay off. By then he’ll be 33. But even with the gift of hindsight and a massive loan that will plague him for almost another decade, Dillon says he wouldn’t change a thing. In fact, he wishes he got the full amount offered to him in living costs - $150 a week, just so his life as a student would have been “easier”. “I wouldn’t have had to rely on my mates for rounds, I could have saved more and I could have moved out of home earlier.”

Dillon may have spent his Government-funded living costs on something StudyLink didn’t intend him to, but still Dillon insists that the people investing their allowances and loans are the ones “in the wrong”. That’s something Rachel hotly disputes. “I work hard. I work 20 hours a week to fund my lifestyle. It’s my money, why shouldn’t I be able to spend it that way? I know so many people who got living costs or allowances and spent it on hair straighteners or longboards and yet I’m in the wrong for being smart with my money? That’s just ridiculous.”

THE STUDENT OF SEPARATED PARENTS: 20-YEAR-OLD LISA KIM* is a little more

sympathetic towards Rachel and Serena. Lisa is in her final year of her degree at Unitec and living at home, but is still eligible for the student allowance because her single mother is unemployed. The $129 she receives each week goes on day-

IN UNISON FEATURE

to-day living costs like petrol, food and her car. She tries to contribute at home, but her mother doesn’t want to make her pay board while she’s still a student, despite this being the purpose the money is intended for. Lisa says StudyLink has never questioned her spending. “They don’t really check up on you or anything like that. Heaps of people get the student allowance and spend it on piss.”

need based solely on a printed figure? Lisa may think frivolous spending is a student’s “own fault” but in reality every New Zealand taxpayer carries the burden of student debt. Last year 82,600 students received allowances at the tax payers expense and 37 per cent of student allowance recipients also received living costs. New Zealand Union of Student Associations (NZUSA) Co-President Pene

THE COMPLEX INDIVIDUAL CIRCUMSTANCES OF EACH STUDENT MAKE THE ALLOWANCE SYSTEM A NIGHTMARE TO ADMINISTER; HOW CAN YOU DETERMINE TRUE NEED BASED SOLELY ON A PRINTED FIGURE? “I guess it’s not fair, but then again they got given the money so it’s their option to spend it as they like. If they spend it on piss and then don’t have any money and get an overdraft or a credit card and get into debt then it’s their own fault really.” Lisa says, even though her parents’ earnings are under the income bracket, they would probably help her out financially if the student allowance wasn’t available. In comparison, Rachel’s parents could comfortably afford to pay for her fees, but would rather she got a loan and worked part time to learn the value of money. The complex individual circumstances of each student make the allowance system a nightmare to administer; how can you determine true

Delaney would like to see even more money going towards students’ living support. NZUSA believe support, in the form of student allowances, is integral to academic success. “While more students are getting allowances, the vast majority are still excluded due to parental-income means-testing till the age of 24.” “More students are continuing to borrow simply to cover basic living costs, resulting in the vast amount of student debt that individual students bear, and the collective student debt of $10 billion now held in the community. We hope the Government will further lower the unfair age threshold of parental means testing in the next budget,” says Delaney. In 2009 expenditure on allowances increased by $118 million (30 per cent)

POLL WWW.USU.CO.NZ/INUNISON If you receive a student allowance or living costs from StudyLink what do you mostly spend it on? Investing or saving Entertainment or drinking nking

20%

7% Rent or board

40%

and reached $516 million. Tertiary Education Minister Steven Joyce has said the Government will lend out about $1.54 billion in student loans in 2010. “While we are committed to interest-free student loans, it is important we are fair to taxpayers and remove any perverse incentives from the scheme as it stands,” says Joyce. “If we take into account student allowances and the student loans we lend to students to pay for fees and living costs, we spend a total of 42 per cent of our total tertiary budget on student support,” he says. Rather than tighten up the eligibility assessment the Government has chosen to introduce other measures to hold the tertiary sector accountable for its spending. These include a lifetime limit on student loan access, making permanent residents and Australians live in New Zealand for two years before getting loans and requiring students to pass more than half of their courses over two years to be able to keep borrowing. “These measures strike a fairer balance between supporting students and respect for taxpayers that supply that support,” says Joyce. Some students, like Karen, worry that students who abuse StudyLink’s services have put living costs and allowances at risk of being cut. Already many students believe the high cost of living is a deterrent to undertaking tertiary study. Horror stories of eating nothing but noodles for a month are aplenty and it certainly doesn’t make studying more attractive. Mathew thinks the financial barrier puts many older students off returning to tertiary study. “It was quite hard, I was staying up until 2am, 3am at night catching up on course work.” Dillon and Rachel, neither of whom spent their money on what it was intended for, are still adamant the government should be doing more to help students. “Uni is tough,” says Dillon. “The Facebook group rings true: ‘University, it’s like being on the dole but your parents are proud of you’. That so accurately describes my life,” he says. *For obvious reasons names in this article have been changed.

General living, food d, bills, petrol etc

33%

Editor’s Note: The spokesperson from the Ministry of Social Development told In Unison “If you have information suggesting speciﬁc individuals are [committing fraud] then please supply it to the Ministry and we will look into it, as we do for all allegations.” To maintain the conﬁdentiality of our sources we did not comply with this request.

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USU STUDENT REPS. ADVISE, REFER, HELP, NEGOTIATE AND TAKE ISSUES TO USU AND TO LECTURERS FOR YOU AND ATTEND REGULAR MEETINGS WITH USU TO TALK THROUGH IMPORTANT ISSUES THE TH E NA NAME MES S AN AND D CO ONT NTAC ACT T DE DETA TAIL ILLS OF CLA ASS REPS. AND PR RE ROG OGRA RAMM MME RE REPS PS S are adv dver e tiised d in you o r department; try lo de ooking g on n Moo oodl d e or Black ckbo oarrd. d OR YOU CAN ASK USU SU’S S STU TUDE DENT REP. COORDINA ATOR R - usueduc ucat atio on@ n@un u itec un ec.a ac.nz (09 09)) 81 15 43 321 x73 73 380 8

USU STUDENT REPS. GET STUFF DONE usu Students’Association at Unitec

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IN UNISON

FEATURE

REVIEWED BY JO JJOS OSEP OS EPH HA EPH H RPE RP R AND RP ND AMA AM MANDA M A HAXTO HA AXT XTO X TTON ,WIT W H A RI R GHT G OF REPLY FROM FRO OM U UNIT NITEC NIT EC C FAC A ILI ILITIE T ES. TIE ILLUSTRATIONS BY SUSANNAH MACDONALD

Grounds: Mt Albert: Joseph: Beaut. Love the hills and all that. The marae is special. Hard out. 5/5 Amanda: Wide open spaces, lots of pukekos, a creek and playing fields. A clear winner, quite possibly the best grounds of any tertiary institute in the country. 5/5

Waitakere: Joseph: Average as. Boring. Ugly .1/5 Amanda: Grounds? What grounds? They are

non-existent… 1/5

Bathrooms: Hub: Joseph: Surprisingly appalling. You would expect ect

Unitec’s central locale to be packed to the rafters with loccations in which you can urinate. They

nes down a flight of are sparse and hidden. The on concrete stairs are repulsive. 1/5 Amanda: Pretty bad - but flushing is really the responsibility of individual students - not the maintenance staff. Those nifty dispensers for antibacterial hand wipes seem to have been empty all year and the hand towels are constantly jammed. 2/5 Facilities: The toilets at Mt Albert campus are generally cleaned once a day. But in areas that have a high use such as The Hub, the toilet facilities are cleaned twice a day. However, there is a large measure of responsibility on the users to also care for their spaces.

Building One: Joseph: Not bad. There are a few goodies. I am of

the mindset that the best toilets are those thos within which you can sort of unwind. I lik like a stand-alone toilet oilet rather than a cubicle. There are a few of these. 4/5

“The antibacterial hand wipe dispensers are again empty at Building One, good thing we’ve all forgotten about swine flu.”

Amanda: The antibacterial hand wipe dispensers

are again empty at Building One; good thing we have all forgotten about Swine Flu. Floors are significantly clearer at this end, although there are some random objects (possibly sculptures) dumped in a few of them. 3/5 Facilities: Antibacterial wipes were installed during the Swine Flu (H1N1 09) pandemic last year and are refilled on a weekly basis along with roller towels. We will look into this matter if this has not been the case. To ensure toilet facilities are kept to a high standard, please let us know as soon as possible and we will have these matters attended to rather than waiting for the next service.

Waitakere: Joseph: Pretty standard. Fewer students and thus fewer mysterious genitals is a nice thought. Still some piss on the floor though. 3/5 Amanda: Quite nice really, mostly clean - even in the middle of the afternoon. Some of the bathrooms even have antibacterial hand wipes in the dispensers. The lights work on a sensor too which gives Waitakere brownie points for energy saving. 4/5

Disability Access: Hub: Joseph: Probably the best of the three. 4/5 Amanda: Lots of ramps down this end of

campus, and many more lifts. Automatic doors are more convenient for everyone. 5/5

IN UNISON FEATURE “The smoke stop doors are quite heavy and do not have automatic buttons to open them.”

Car parking: Building One: Joseph: Feels reasonably well equipped. 3/5 Amanda: Parking is quite inconsistent, the

amount of available spaces differs on any given time or day. It’s free though, if you get in early. 4/5

The Hub: Joseph: Has fewer parks in close proximity to

Building One: Joseph: More stairs than is preferable. Way more.

There is also a shortage of disability friendly toilets. 2/5 Amanda: Building One is pretty tricky to navigate for an able-bodied student so I can not even imagine how you would cope in a wheelchair. There are lifts; it’s just a matter of finding them. The smoke stop doors are quite heavy and do not have automatic buttons to open them. There is not much ramp access and the disabled toilets are often inside the main toilets. So, although the disabled cubicle has a wide door, the main entrance remains quite narrow. 1/5 Facilities: Yes, being an old building, Building One is large and often difficult to navigate. As a consequence, it is also difficult to modify. The old solid timber doors can be quite heavy but we do adjust the tension of the closers on these doors to the lightest setting to try and make it easier to open. They also do need to be there for fire safety reasons.

Waitakere: Joseph: Fine if you want the ground floor. More

lifts than Building One. 3/5 Amanda: The compact size and relative newness of the Waitakere building obviously makes it easier to navigate. g There are p plentyy of lifts and

disabled bathrooms, although only the ground level disabled bathroom had an automatic button to open it. 4/5

Safety: Mt Albert: Joseph: I feel pretty safe when I am striding

around late at night. Security are a constant (if a little bothersome) presence. 4/5 Amanda: Security is there, and are friendly too. There is CCTV, but the “do you know this person” posters in Building One indicate it can be hard to identify culprits even if they are caught on camera. Once in a blue moon there are those worrying breakouts from the Mason Clinic. Also, I don’t think there is enough floodlighting between Carrington’s and the Village at night. 2/5 Facilities: To our knowledge there have been three breakouts from the Mason Clinic in the past 17 years. If any such breakouts were to occur, Unitec has processes in place to ensure the safety of our students and staff. While it is true that the printed CCTV image can be difficult to recognise people, the footage from the CCTV coverage is extensive and very effective and is very helpful to police and their inquiries. The exterior lighting around Mt Albert campus is continu ually monitored and increased where necessary. For example, the lights between Carring gton’s and the Student Village have been noted and a we are currently in the process of getting g pricing on lights to improve vision around d there at night.

Waita akere: Joseph: I would just stay out of West Auckland

after ho ours. 1/5 Amanda: A courthouse next door? Criminals in yourr backyard at both campuses’ it is really not thee best look …. And, like Mt Albert, there doesn’tt seem to be enough lighting in the evenings for students walking to car parks. 3/5 Facilities: Street lighting along the Waitakere campu us is the responsibility of the Waitakere City Co Council although we do work closely with “Floors are significantly clearer them to improve services and facilities around down this end, although there are that area. some random objects (possibly sculptures) dumped in some of them.”

the building. 2/5 Amanda: Usually easy to get a park down here, but it will cost you. The pay and display machines are out of order quite regularly though, leaving you wondering if it’s safe to skip paying or better not to risk it. 4/5

Waitakere: Joseph: Loaded with parks. Spanks this category. Car parking is expensive at all three. 4/5 Amanda: Mostly pay and display or 60 /120 minute parking around Waitakere. There are a few free spots if you can get in quick enough. 3/5

Self-service kitchen facilities: Hub: Joseph: This depends on which programme you

study in. Each department has its own kitchen issues/joys. The Hub has more communal facilities than the other two areas. 3/5 Amanda: Not too bad in The Hub area, lots of microwaves, gets pretty crowded though. 3/5

Building One: Joseph: Pretty weak. The only real appliance is a

somewhat dirty microwave. 1/5 Amanda: Nothing, certainly nothing that was accessible enough for me to find. 0/5

Waitakere: Joseph: I honestly couldn’t find anything. Maybe

I’m dumb*. I am really not though. 0/5 *Editor’s note: There are self-service facilities at Waitakere, Joseph just could not find them. Amanda: Quite a nice little kitchen area, the vending machine even has Mi Goreng noodles in it. Best of all there is a free dispenser providing coffee and hot chocolate. 4/5

On-campus food outlets: Hub: Joseph: Boring as. Come on! Are pies and crisps

the best thing? 1/5 Amanda: A good range of food options in The Hub, with open plan indoor and outdoor seating. The coffee cart is great, pity there is not more than one, as the lines can get long at breaks. The meals are a reasonable price, although less fried foods would be nice. 4/5

IN UNISON FEATURE Amanda: It is a great idea to have a library with

only books relevant to subjects available at this end; it makes it much quicker to find stuff. 4/5

“Sometimes I like to walk, there’s no need to pull over beside me all the time you overenthusiastic shuttle drivers.”

Building One: Joseph: I like The Long Black Café and their nice

staff and their strange furniture. 4/5 Amanda: Long Black is a great café with a good

Joseph: Yeah…1/5 Amanda: Pretty isolated from the Mt Albert events

like Sounds in the Sun, hardly any bars around. There is a handy Family Planning though, plenty of young people there you can hang out with…1/5

Transport: Mt Albert: Joseph: The train is your best option in terms of

public transport. The buses aren’t too frequent down Carrington Road. However, it is easy to get a bus from pretty much anywhere to Point Chevalier. Also the recently improved North Western cycleway is something of a dream. 4/5

Joseph: Wahoo! This library is at the top of a

regular library. Which means you can get books like “Twilight” or “Dragon Tattoo Town” as well as books about stuff you’re studying. 5/5 Amanda: I wish you could take your coffee from Gloria Jean’s into the library like you can at the public library in town. I will settle for just having the cute little walkway that means when it is raining you do not get wet en route like you do at Mt Albert. 4/5

The Winners:

Amanda: Traffic is shocking. Typical of Auckland.

You are particularly affected by build-ups around the Point Chevalier and St Luke’s motorway onramps. Even with bus lanes public transport is not unaffected by this traffic, best you take the train. 2/5

range of healthier options and nice coffee and staff. That being said, it is slightly more expensive in general than food at the other end of the campus. Waitakere: It would be good to have more than one option to Joseph: Train time. Also the cycle route that runs along beside the motor way is quite nice. Traffic choose from down this end. 4/5 can be a total drag. Don’t drive. 3/5 Waitakere: Amanda: Much easier to get to if you already Joseph: Same as The Hub. What is with food places live out West, as there is less random suburban that are just basically clones of each other and traffic than Mt Albert. However, if you have to have awful names? 1/5 use the motorway you are screwed. 2/5 Amanda: The coffee cart seems to be abandoned every time I am at Waitakere, although I am told Shuttle service: there is “usually” someone there. 1/5 Joseph: No comment. 0/5 Amanda: Very handy, almost to the point of Social life: being a little irritating. Sometimes I like to Mt Albert: walk, there’s no need to pull over beside me all Joseph: In The Hub there are usually lots of the time you over enthusiastic shuttle drivers. students around, though most people are in their Also, the shuttle timetables at either end of little groups or listening to iPods. You could get a the campus could really benefit from being haircut and chat to the cutter perhaps? 1/5 significantly bigger and easier to read. 4/5 Amanda: Mt Albert has Carrington’s, the majority Facilities: The timetable holders are a standard of USU events and Village parties. A clear winner size used by public transport so we will check when it comes to social life between the two with our suppliers to see if these can be campuses. However, because of its isolation in Mt increased in size. Albert it lacks the easy access to the viaduct bars that AUT and Auckland Uni have in the CBD. 4/5 Library

Waitakere:

Hub: Joseph: Lots of computers/books. There’s a

librarian named Callum who is hard out cool and real knowledgeable about cricket/Martin Crowe. 4/5 Amanda: For the “main” library it is a pretty average size given how many different subjects and students there are at Unitec. There are quite a lot of computers though, and some nice relaxing couches. 3/5

Grounds: Mt Albert Bathrooms: Tie Building One, Waitakere Disability Access: The Hub Saftey: Mt Albert Car parking: Tie Building One, Waitakere Self Service Kitchen Facilities: The Hub On-Campus Food Outlets: Building One Social Life: Mt Albert Transport: Mt Albert Library: Waitakere

POLL Do you think there is a sense of unity between Unitec’s three campuses? I didn’t know there was more than one campus.... 29% Yes, there is a sense of unity 15% No, because I hate the North shore campus 3% No, because I hate Waitakere Campus 6% No, because I hate the Mt Albert Campus 3% Yes, because the shuttle connects them 18%

Building One: Joseph: The Irish man named Brendan is a

dream. Actually all of the librarians are really, helpful and willing to go the extra distance to help you smash out some B-s/A+s. 4/5

No, there is a rivalry because the campuses are so 26%

POLL FROM WWW.USU.CO.NZ/INUNISON

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IN UNISON COLUMNS

Dear

SPLINTER &

SPOR A DRAWN GAME AGAINST PARAGUAY, with no goals

scored, saw a bittersweet end to the All Whites’ FIFA World Cup campaign. The draw was not enough to send the All Whites through to the last 16. Following on from oneall draws with Slovakia and current world champions Italy the nil-all draw left an unbeaten All Whites side in select company as one of only four sides to exit a World Cup unbeaten - Scotland (1974) Cameroon (1982) and Belgium (1998). Much of the world’s press, including some from our own shores, offered us little hope of success in the World Cup. There was even talk after the so called “friendly” match with Australia that Bahrain should be going instead, as New Zealand was likely to be “thrashed” in all three pool games. However, the team had a steadfast self belief that if they played to their potential then they could compete and come away with a result. After the final match, Coach Ricki Herbert reflected on the team’s achievements. “To go home unbeaten - I would never have dreamed of that

Barbie going into the tournament,” Herbert said. Their historic achievement of gaining three World Cup points has left this rugby nation proud and gotten Kiwis excited about football like they’ve never been before. Herbert said: “I’m just so proud of these guys - to go out unbeaten at a World Cup. Will that ever happen again? I doubt it.” The results have given young football fans here new heroes to look up to and emulate. And, who knows, those kids may be the players of the future who go on to win New Zealand’s first win at the World Cup. These results will no doubt have helped put New Zealand football and its players on the world stage. Some of the bigger football nations are already showing an interest in the football talent here. This is likely to see more and more Kiwis plying their trade in the domestic leagues of the powerhouses of football around the world. “To finish the tournament unbeaten, and above defending champions Italy, is an astounding achievement and something we should all be proud of.” Harry Ngata (former All White). That’s at s the view from the bench

Dear Barbie, I have an ingrown toenail that really hurts. It’s been growing for ages and is all swollen and a bit oozy. I’m well aware I could have something done about it at the doctor or attempt it myself. The reason I am writing is I just don’t want to. As I said it’s quite painful but I find it morbidly fascinating. I like to slip my shoe off after a hard day at Unitec and just stare at it, or occasionally prod it. I’m strangely fascinated by this little everyday ritual. The thing is I went to the marae the other day and had to take my shoes off. I wasn’t wearing socks, my girlfriend saw the infamous toenail and is really concerned and keeps nagging me to get it looked at, but I’m so attached. What am I ggoingg to do? Toe Lover

Dear Toe Lover, This is not as uncommon as you may think. I know several female dolls, I wont name names, (CINDY) that are constantly picking at their ingrown hairs, inflaming them and making them infected. They love it. The same goes for all those people who pick their cuticles until they bleed. It becomes a highly addictive habit, probably something to do with Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (but I’m no Dr. Phil). Sounds like you’ve let the toenail go on a bit long though, especially if someone you find attractive has seen your nasty little secret. I’m thinking you would probably choose your girlfriend over the ingrown toenail if push came to shove. Head to the doctor an nd get that baby removed d ASAP. Xx Barbie

Dear Barbie, I saw in your last column someone asked a question about politics/movies. I thought this person was just ridiculous, clearly you are a blonde bimbo doll, and are not a real person; I thought to myself “what would a piece of plastic know about politics?” More, it turned out, than the person who wrote the question knew. I ponder why Unitec students are so unaware of current events and the world situation. Tell me oh wise plastic doll! TELL ME! Cynical Barbie Hater.

Dear Cynical Barbie Hater, You are not the first to question Barbie’s all-knowing words of wisdom and you certainly won’t be the last. See, I have a tool at hand which Unitec students do not seem to utilise. It’s called Wikipedia and it tells Barbie everything. People could type in “UK Elections” and “strange spotty rash” and find out all the information I dish out. However they choose not to. Preferring, for some unknown reason, to share their disgusting questions with the whole of Unitec. Bless them. Xx Barbie.

Email Barbie your problems inunison@unitec.ac.nz

BEARS

WHAKARONGO O

MAI

BY JOSEPH HARPER

I’M A BIG ADMIRER OF BEARS. Not physically. I mean,

I’m not very big. I’m slight. But my admiration for bears is rotund. Bears are pretty great. Grizzly, Kodiak, Panda, Brown, Polar. All bears. I like how bears can rip people’s heads off and eat their faces. Sometimes I want to rip people’s faces off. I like that bears can go “rarrrrrrrrrr” and make people scared and leave them alone. I would like to go “rarrrrrrrr” sometimes. I don’t like that bears eat fish. But I admire the way they can put their paws into a river and pull out a big fish real easy. I also like honey. The best thing is hibernation though. I love hibernation. Bears don’t go into what is known as “true” hibernation, but they go into “relative” hibernation. When it gets cold, bears just go into a cave/crib where they have stored heaps of mean snacks and just chill (ironic use of slang. Hibernating is really about staying warm.) This is good, because sleep is cool. I don’t sleep very well. I have insomnia. I’m like the machinist. I’m marginally less skinny than him. I’m getting there though. As such I have something of an estranged relationship with sleep. I fantasise about it. I even eroticise the act. Dream up glorious and far-fetched

sleeping positions. I had this idea which I like to call ‘The Hungry Caterpillar’ which involved a mean abdominal workout and some sweet/sexy sleep occurring simultaneously. The concept requires some advanced machinery which I haven’t been able to construct yet. I like to sleep on the very edge of the bed. I like the danger of it. There’s a very real possibility I’ll wake up on the floor, God knows it’s happened before (just joking, I don’t drink much, just a few mini-ricadonnas.) I also like the option of air. It’s pretty nice to stick a leg out into the night. It makes the leg sort of cold and the rest of your body warmer by comparison. I think it’s nice to be in two temperatures at once. There are probably some bears that sleep right at the edge of the cave. So as to feel cool winter wind on their fur whilst also being toasty/asleep. People don’t really talk about sleeping when they talk about sleeping with someone. Mostly they talk about having sex. They get excitable over possible positions. I think the post-coital arrangements are more interesting. I want to make a kama-sutra book full of positions couples could try to spice up their sleep-life. Here’s some I’ve come up with so far:

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GRAD PROFILE

Robyn Paterson (22) is a graduate from Unitec’s Bachelor of Performing Arts programme. Originally from Pietamaritzburg, South Africa, Robyn has recently appeared on Shortland Street and also teaches drama to children. Robyn is performing a one woman show at the Basement Theatre at the end of July. In Unison caught up with her to talk about “Introducing Anna” and the transition from student to working actress. What made you want to be an actress? I do not remember ever deciding I wanted to be an actress, it is something that I have always known. I got my first role when I was three years old as the narrator for the Christmas nativity play in my kindergarten back in South Africa, and I just have not even considered doing anything else. How old were you when you got into the industry? I got my first professional break when I was 14 on Shortland Street. I played this character who was this Recent appearances: stereotypical nerd called Melissa Comrie who tried to Shortland Street, win the heart of Roy Snow’s character Matt, who was Curry Munchers, twice her age. Paradise at The End of the World and the Young and Hungry Festival for up-andcoming talent 2009.

What has been your favourite role to date and why? Probably as a supporting role in the soon to be released New Zealand feature film “Curry Munchers.” I went in and auditioned for the lead role, but got cast instead as this host of this cooking show in the film. They just let the camera roll while my co-actor and I got to improvise and bounce off each other and just try and make each other laugh. It was awesome to be given that freedom to play. When you just follow your instincts, thatt is when you create your best work. I just hope it makees the final cut!

Tell us about “Introducing Anna” what was your inspiration? “Introducing Anna” is a one woman show thatt I have been creating and writing for the last year. It all started d from a very bad break up that I went through. I started d to write, to vent, and get it all out. As I contin nued I suddenly could hear this character talking to me.. So I Introducing Anna started to write more, and realised I was lookiing at a 27th-31st of July potential theatre show. It is a comedy about a young n The Basement Theatre Australian girl who works here in Auckland att Lower Greys Ave. Denny’s, but she’s missing something...And Adults $18.00 is looking in all the wrong places for it. It Students $15.00 touches on things we can all relate to, like Tickets $10.00 on love and break ups and loneliness and how Thursday. relationships can change you and how love For tickets email drives you mental. I performed a 10-minute introducing2010@ version of the show at the Short and Sweet gmail.com Festival, which is the largest 10-minute Door sales available all theatre festival in the world. It was picked nights. from 1100 entries from around the world like Malaysia and Singapore and Germany.

It also placed second in my division, for The People’s Choice Award and The Judge’s Award. What challenges do you face with a one woman show? The biggest challenge I face is myself. That voice in my head that tells me it is not good enough or boring and all those negative thoughts that really are not necessary. Of course though, it is not just one woman putting this whole thing on. There is no way I could so this by myself. I have a wonderful team behind me. How have you found the transition from being a student to a working actress? At drama school you get to act everyday. You train everyday. You are learning and working on your craft every single day. When you graduate, it is so easy to become lazy and lose focus. It is up to you to keep training and keep pushing yourself. If you don’t, there are 20 other people breathing down your neck who want it just as badly. What advice would you give fell fe l ow actting g st s uden de ts t ? Make you ourr own work rk,, do not sitt aatt ho ome w itin wa ittin ing, g bec g, ecau cau usee you will bee do d in ng it for qu uiite a whiile l . Keep Ke e readi ding di ng.. ng Keeep e leaarn r in ng. g Expllor Ex o e!! Go to ffar a aw away w y plaace c s an a d do reeal ally lyy wei eird r , fa rd farr ou o ut out thin th ings in gss! Make Maake k yyo our li ou our life fe exxtr trao ao ord rdin in narr y. y

IN UNISON

HOROSCOPES Cancer June 21 - July 22 Impulse buying will be tempting this month onth but if you can maintain willpower your finances will be in good health and you will be s. able to pursue those long held ambitions.

WHAT TO DO: IF YOU NEED TO APPEAL A GRADE.

WHY WOULD YOU WANT TO APPEAL A GRADE? If you feel a grade doesn’t accurately reflect the work you have done or is unfair then you may want to formally appeal a grade (instead of throwing a tantrum and complaining about how life sucks). You don’t have to have failed to appeal a grade and you can appeal a grade from any kind of assessment, be it a practical assignment, exam, essay, presentation or practicum.

HOW LONG DO YOU HAVE TO APPEAL? You will need to appeal within 15 working days (does not include weekends) since the date you received your final grade. In special circumstances this time period can be extended.

HOW DO YOU GO ABOUT APPEALING A GRADE? 1

Ask to view your exam script or assessment.

Try and sort it out with your lecturer or programme leader.

Make an application for an appeal. A form for this can be obtained at Student Central.

The appeal will be sent to the head of your department who will get back in touch with you within five working days and let you know if your appeal request has been granted.

If it is granted a hearing will be set up and a decision will be made by a panel of staff and a student representative.

WHO CAN HELP YOU WHEN APPEALING A GRADE? Your lecturer. Your programme leader. The USU student issues advocates (free lawyers). Contact the USU issues Advocates at any time in the appeal process for advice or if you have questions. Email usuadvocate@unitec.ac.nz

Leo July 23 - August 22 You will be tempted to make plans but never put them into practice this month. A friend, probably a water sign (Cancer, Pisces, or Scorpio) will offer you a plan which will be very successful if you follow through with it. Virgo August 23 - September 22 You will feel frustrated as your finances seem to be lacking. Emotional conflict is inevitable. Be patient and avoid making rash decisions. Libra September 23 - October 22 Try and take in the simple things this month. You need a break from this intense time in your life. Excitement will begin to build again later in the month particularly in your romantic interests. Scorpio October 23 - November 21 Tension or conflict you have been avoiding all year will finally come to a head. Keep your cool and you will finally be able to work things out. Sagittarius November 22 - December 21 You will feel the need to get physical this month, indulge in this activity and it may result in romance. You may also run into conflict with a work colleague or someone in your professional life. Capricorn December 22 - January 19 Tensions between relatives will be high this month, as you are going through a major life

change. Speak honestly and discuss your life goals with your loved ones so that they can understand your point of view. Aquarius January 20 - February 18 Look before you leap this month, if an enticing possibility or a chance to make some fast money looks to good too be true it’s usually because it is. Pisces February 19 - March 20 A difficult emotional problem must be solved discretely this month but on the plus side someone out there will recognise your creative potential. Aries March 21 - April 19 Try to resolve ongoing conflicts this month or they will lead to long-term resentment. You may also realise you have let yourself fall behind with work or school commitments and will need to catch up. Taurus April 20 - May 20 Make sure you find time to do things you enjoy and don’t get too caught up in the stress of everyday activities. Things are looking up for you financially this month. Gemini May 21 - June 20 Your relationships with loved ones may suffer over a simple misunderstanding. On the plus side there is the possibility of new romance as the month draws to a close.

IN UNISON

REVIEWS 2 Sex & The City #2 Director: Michael Patrick King

The A-Team Directed by Joe Carnahan This is a film adaption of a campy, 80s, action series. The A-Team is really bad. Everything that is wrong and bloated and ugly about modern “mainstream” film-making is in The A-Team. The “plot” follows a group of Iraq War veterans looking to clear their name with the U.S. military who suspect the four men of committing a crime for which they were framed. The director is a man named Joe Carnahan. His first film was called Blood, Guts, Bullets and Octane (1998) and bore the tagline, “Two Cats… One Car… And A World Of Hurt…” That’s all you really need to know about Joe Carnahan. That’s all you really need to know about The A-Team. It’s tacky and clichéd and one dimensional and the plot is so thin it could be mistaken for an Olsen Twin. It’s embarrassing that Liam Neeson plays the lead role. It’s shit. It’s really shit. It’s really really shit. Maybe that’s the point? I mean, the TV series was all those things too. So maybe Joe Carnahan was just trying to be true to his source material. I doubt it. But maybe. If this is the case, it was a mistake. Good points? Okay. Sharlto Copley (the guy from District Nine) is quite good as the insane asylum resident/top gun helicopter pilot, H. M. “Howling Mad” Murdock (Seriously?). He occasionally rouses a smile. For a film which is certainly nothing more than a nostalgia vehicle, I was pretty annoyed that they changed the theme tune (arguably the A-Team’s defining device) and replaced it with some awful guitar rompy thing. It would be easy for this film to plead “escapism” or “fun”. But I don’t think The A-Team even stacks up in these departments. Nothing is particularly spectacular. And the absurdly paced editing left me feeling nauseous. Don’t.

For die hard fans of the Sex And The Ciity series news of a second movie was met with enthusiasm, and subsequently, disappointmeent. It’s been two years since we last saw Carriee and the girls. Samantha (Kim Catrall) is now going through menopause. Charlotte (Kirsten n Davis) is struggling to cope with her two kids (even as a full time mom with a full time nanny). Miranda (Cynthia Nixon) has quit her job and Carrie (Sarah Jessica Parker)) is fighting a losing battle trying to get her husband, Mr Big (Cris Noth) away from the television. The girls get a break from their mundane lives when Samantha is offered an unbelievable first class trip to Abu Dhabi. Off they trot, designer heels and hundreds of suitcases in tow, across the world to the Middle East. What follows is a series of ridiculous escapades, a hearty dose of Middle Eastern stereotyping, and some cameels. There is very little actual sex to be had. After all, this is Abu Dhabi, and the actresses aren’t spring chickens anymore. Like the first movie, SATC#2 lacks the grittty rawness of the original series and turns to cheap one liners and celebrity appearances. Liza Minnelli’s version n of Beyonce’s “Single Ladies” will make you cringe. Surprisiingly, seeing Liza helps soften the blow for the dreaded Miley Cyrus appearance. Kiwi and Aussie viewers will be aamused however, by the sex god portrayal of the Australian ruggby team (the casting agent must have let her imagination rrun away with her.) There’s still fun to be had in scrutinising th he outfits, hair and weight of the lead characters. All four ur are looking unusually thin, Kim Catrall is finally starting to show her age and Sarah Jessica Parker has dirty roots as bad as they were in the first few seasons. The outfits, while undeniably stunning, were a tad too revealing and over the top. Even the (formally corporate) style of Miranda has been turned into something flamboyantly absurd, making the characters hard to relate to. It’s an enjoyable outing with girlfriends (definitely not boyfriend friendly). But (on the whole) the movie is a disappointment, resorting to creating the everyday female stereotypes the series used to relish in breaking. Amanda Haxton

Joseph Harper

WIN Movie reviews thanks to Skycity Cinemas WIN: Email inunison@unitec.ac.nz and name one of the movies reviewed in this issue to be in to win a double movie pass to a Skycity Cinemas.

IN UNISON REVIEWS

Mini Reviews

Voila! Sandringham Road 573 Sandringham Road oad In a long strip of award-winning Indian and Asian takeaways and specialty food stores sits the similarly award-winning, but geographically isolated, French/Moroccan Music café Voila! FLORENCE LORENCE + THE MACHINE Like many Sandringham Road “LUNGS” establishments Voila provides quality, The Intricate Art of Actually Caring traditional meals at a reasonable price. Written by Eli Kent / The Basement Theatre Although this debut album Unfortunately, like its neighbours, it was released last year it has lacks in the interior décor department. A only gained recognition few posters for French films are the only Initially, The Intricate Art of Actually Caring in New Zealand in recent reference to the culture of the café . seemed like just another existential, Wellingtonian, twomonths. With material released There’s a limited amount of sidewalk person play. Performed, as usual, in a post Flight Of The slowly over several years you seating, on a street with a fair bit of Chorchords style, and (being Wellingtonian) complete will likely find you have been sidewalk traffic. In the summer they open with at least one substantial beard. It is all of those things, a fan of Florence’s songs for the French doors and let in some much with a few extra sweat patches and some super cute years from the Greys Anatomy needed sunlight to the small dark room. overhead projectors (OHPs) thrown in for good measure. and Love Actually soundtracks. Cramped when busy seating makes it tricky What is surprising and funny, is that the play not only Lungs is a fantastic, highly to see the blackboard menu and gaze, acknowledges, but also embraces, its status as a cliché. recommendable debut mouth watering, at the cabinet food. The play opens in Eli’s bedroom at his parent’s house. album. Despite these annoyances, the Best friends Eli Kent and Jack Shadbolt are hanging out, SSandringham locals love this café and discussing the meaning of life, swearing a lot and getting often fill all the tables, with good reason. o pissed. A stereotypical pair of underachieving 21-year-old The food is divine, never a bad meal in Wellingtonians, Eli (the playwright) is a wannabe actor tthe many times I’ve visited. The selection whose main interests include comic books and taking of crepes is well worth choosing over the o drugs (but only on the weekend). Jack, played by Jack more standard kiwi breakfast fare. The m Sergeant, is an existential poet looking for meaning in cchocolate, almond and pear crepes will his mundane life. But instead he ends up drinking too have you reminiscing, stomach grumbling, h much beer and recording his drunken ramblings on a ffor weeks after your visit. dictaphone. The gallettes (savoury pancakes) are Film Jack, in search of life’s meaning, sets out on a road trip heart-warming on cold winter days, try h GET HIM TO THE GREEK to find James K Baxter’s Jerusalem. Eli tags along. They one of the weekly specials like Chicken Director: Nicholas Stoller count road kill, eat fish and chips, smoke some weed, Balentine or Lamb Kesta. Rich flavours and stop at an excellent pie shop. Jack’s unintentionally are beautifully balanced with seasonal epic sweat patches increase throughout the 80 minute Spin-offs are often a recipe vegetables and presented impeccably. A play, adding that extra touch of realness. It’s all highly for disaster but funny men little wine to accompany the food would be believable and mundane without being boring. The Russell Brand and Jonah Hill a welcome addition. frequent quoting from New Zealand poetry is perfectly manage to hold Get Him To The Both coffee and staff are excellent, and timed, although a certain amount of literary knowledge is Greek (spin off from Forgetting usually fast (with the exception of first necessary for the audience to fully appreciate it. Sarah Marshall) together. A thing in morning). The pastries and cakes The play ponders some big questions like grief, atheism mindless, enjoyable watch that are rich, but delicious and beautifully and friendship. And yet it presents these issues in a way will easilyy entice laughs. g presented. It’s advisable to buy some of p that is simple, uncluttered and amusing. The “cute and ttheir bread, baked fresh onsite, before you don’t I just know it” set design is a real highlight of the lleave. production. Comprised of naively drawn backgrounds The décor is the only thing letting this projected on OHPs, it utilises the actors as stage hands ccafé down. But anyone who has been to Love to share your a beautiful restaurant with terrible food and weaves the OHP changes into the storyline. The opinion? Intricate Art of Actually Caring relates to a broad audience will agree that Volia! is a prime example of w Want to go to movies, gigs, ttaste soaring above style. and welcomes young theatre-goers to a modern age of and shows for free? kiwi writing. AAmanda Haxton Amanda Haxton

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RECIPES Just like Grandma would make - if you were Italian...

Italian Meatballs with chunky tomato sauce Serves three - four depending on the hunger of the individuals

Makes M k 1 Pit Pitcher h

Sangria, Spanish punch, is a fantastic drink for socialising and compliments many ďŹ&#x201A;avours including Spanish, Italian and Mexican dishes. Using a red wine base, Sangria is economical to make and therefore a great party drink. This recipe can be altered depending on the time of year to utilize whatever fresh fruit is in season. With the exception of banana, most fruits work well in Sangria, particularly citrus fruits, melons and berries. INGREDIENTS: 1 Bottle of cheap red wine 1 Litre of orange or pineapple fruit juice 1 Tin of fruit salad (drained) or Fresh fruitt if available 1 Orange or lemon 1 Sprig of fresh mint Ice

DIRECTIONS: Chop fruit (if necessary) into small chunks and slice orange or lemon into thin round pieces. In a jug, soak the fruit in the red wine and cover with plastic wrap. For maximum strength and flavour you should soak the fruit overnight, otherwise for at least an hour. Just before serving add the fruit juice, ice and fresh mint and stir. For a less alcoholic version you can also add so oda water. In the summer try this t recipe using balls of waterrmelon for a refreshing drink at BBQs and beach parties.

INGREDIENTS: MEATBALLS 350gms beef, chicken or lamb mince 1 Onion, finely chopped 1 Piece of bread ripped into small pieces, or half a cup of breadcrumbs. 1Cup of milk 1 Egg 1 Teaspoon of beef stock 1 Teaspoon of garlic 1 Teaspoon of olive oil 1/4 Cup of parmesan or tasty cheese, grated. Salt and pepper INGREDIENTS: CHUNKY TOMATO SAUCE 1 Tin of chopped tomatoes 1 Onion 1 Teaspoon of olive oil 1 Teaspoon of garlic Sprinkle of basil Salt and pepper

Using many of the same ingredients as spaghetti bolognaise, meatballs are a nice alternative for dinner and are far easier to make than many people imagine. The key to this recipe is to mix the cheese into the meatballs instead of just sprinkling it on top. If you are not a tomato fan you can use a little garlic yoghurt as topping instead. DIRECTIONS: MEATBALLS: Put milk in a large mixing bowl and add breadcrumbs, leave until milk has been completely absorbed. Add all other meatball ingredients and stir gently with a wooden spoon until combined. Heat a small amount of olive oil in a shallow pan. Mould the mince mixture into balls around 2cm in diameter. Place balls in pan and turn every few minutes until brown all over. SAUCE: Brown onions in a pan and then add all other ingredients and simmer on a medium heat for around five minutes. Add meatballs and increase heat until sauce is bubbling. bubbling Serve meatballs and sauce on pasta, spaghetti or rice. Sprinkle with extra cheese if desired.

USU

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