I-Parent Magazine by I-Parent Magazine

I-PARENT The mission of I-Parent Magazine is to be the most valuable source of parenting information and a local resource for families in the York Region of Ontario. We are committed to enhancing the lives of families by maintaining excellence in editorial content and encouraging community awareness.

Volume 1, Issue 1– I-Parent

Contents I-Parent Magazine 5-150 Hollidge Blvd Suite 184 Aurora, Ontario www.i-parent.ca

 Growing strong  The Advantages of Bilingualism  Long Distance Grandparent Survival

Guide

Publisher & Editor Donna de Levante Raphael Contributing Writers Alesha Almata Nora Camacho Dahlia S. Webb Monica Santangelo P.B. de Levante Marianne Rogers Dr. Renaldo Mortimer Ira Schwartz Marcus Chandasekharan Patricia Garner Ellen Notbohm Patti Rawling-Anderson Paul Humphrey Donna de Levante Raphael Chrystal Saunders Graphic Designer

Hany Barsoum

Advertising Sales

905-481-1240

Marketing Manager 905-481-1240 Circulation

Donna de Levante Raphael info@i-parent.ca

Departments Baby Basics

Family finances

Toddler to Preschool

Education

Tween & Teen

Daddy Life

The Hip Mom

Together Time

Family Nutrition

Family Health

Single Parent world

Editor’s Note We Are Always A Work In Progress Dear Moms, Dads and Guardians, Welcome to the first issue of I-Parent Magazine. I-Parent was created to support, inspire and empower parents to raise inspired children. We’re definitely not here to make you perfect but we’re here to help guide you along the way to be the “good enough parent of the 21st century.” Our small team wants to inspire and empower as many parents as possible, who have kids from 0 to 15 years. Our topics range from birth to having the difficult conversations and open communication with kids, creating structure and setting limits, having fun as a parent to family vacations to family finances. An I-Parent mom knows that there is no such thing as being a perfect mom, friend and wife. She is the best friend you wish you had all these years. She is inspirational, intuitive, powerful, and resourceful. She is organized, responsible, and motivates you to be the best you can be. She is loving, nurturing, open and honest. She will help you deal with your husband, kids, mother, job, relationship and home. She gets personal. She multitasks - she is a mom, partner, friend, chauffeur, classroom mom, employee, boss, finger paint expert, bill payer, chef, hostess, playdate coordinator. She'll tease you when you need to lighten up and cut you or others a break when you need it. She is your best friend. I-Parent staff, hopes to develop a platform where forward thinking moms can get information, be inspired, and meet other similarly motivated moms. As we moms continue to learn from each other and know that we need all the advice we can get - we want to hear from you about what you like, what you don't like, and what you'd like to see. I-Parent wants you to be a part of our family. Join us at www.i-parent.ca and on Facebook at I-Parent Magazine.

Donna

Baby Basics

Your Baby’s Amniotic Fluid: To Bank It or Not By: IP Staff

During a pregnancy, a mom-to-be is faced with so many decisions that it can become overwhelming. Many of those decisions—such as how to share the good news, how many onesies to get or what color to paint the nursery—can be made on a whim. Other decisions, however, such as which prenatal tests to undergo or which medications to take while pregnant, require research and forethought. Today, thanks to advances in stem cell research, there is one more important decision for a new mom to make: to bank, or not to bank, her baby's amniotic fluid. Because there are still many unknowns related to amniotic fluid and its potential for future uses, the decision to have it collected for storing is one you may want to discuss with your partner and your health care provider. Below you'll find information to help you decide. First, you need to understand what amniotic fluid is and why it may be valuable enough to you and your family for storing.

What Is Amniotic Fluid? Amniotic fluid is the clear, slightly yellowish liquid that surrounds your baby within the amniotic sac. In addition to providing your baby with nourishment and protection while he or she is in utero, amniotic fluid has additional benefits, because it is one of the richest, natural sources of stem cells.

Why Bank Amniotic Fluid? There are three significant benefits to banking amniotic fluid:  1. Inside amniotic fluid are mesenchymal stem cells. This type of stem cell is pluripotent, which means it has the ability to grow into different tissues and may ultimately be used to treat a variety of conditions. Current research shows the benefits of using these stem cells to help regenerate different organs and tissues including kidney, bone, skin, cartilage, liver and heart. 2. Amniotic fluid stem cells are a perfect match for the baby, meaning organs and tissues grown from these cells will always be accepted by the body without risk of rejection. 3. Amniotic fluid stem cells may also match immediate family members so preserving amniotic fluid may provide opportunities for siblings and parents to take advantage of medical advances.

How Is Amniotic Fluid Collected? Collecting amniotic fluid for banking is easy and safe during prenatal tests such as genetic amniocentesis and fetal lung amniocentesis, and throughout the entire pregnancy. It will not change prenatal testing procedures in any way and will not have any impact on the tests results. Many health care professionals typically withdraw more fluid than necessary for the prenatal test. So, rather than discarding already withdrawn leftover amniotic fluid, mothers now have the option to preserve a small portion, often just about a teaspoonful, of the fluid for decades.

October 2011- I-Parent Magazine

Baby Basics

What Are Stem Cells and Where Do They Come From? Stem cells are the basic building blocks of a human organism, from which all other types of cells originate. They have remarkable potential for use in medicine because they can develop into different types of cells such as brain cells, heart cells, skin cells or muscle cells. Stem cell research is one of the most important medical and scientific areas of study today, and each new discovery in the use of these cells moves the medical community one step closer to finding treatments for many lifethreatening conditions and diseases. There are many types of stem cells and four main sources for obtaining them: adult cells, cord blood cells, amniotic fluid cells and embryonic cells. The collection and use of stem cells from amniotic fluid avoids any potential ethical concerns because they are harvested without any harm to the baby.

What are the Differences Between Amniotic Fluid and Cord Blood?â&#x20AC;¨ During pregnancy, you have the option to collect stem cells from amniotic fluid or cord blood, so it's important to understand the differences between the two: â&#x20AC;˘ Amniotic fluid contains mesenchymal stem cells, which are multifunctional and can develop into many cell types, tissues and organs, including skin, muscle, neurons, cardiac tissue, kidney, liver, cartilage, bone, tendon and more. In the future, there might be a broad range of potential uses and therapeutic applications for these cells. â&#x20AC;˘ Cord blood contains hematopoietic stem cells, which means they develop into blood type cells. These stem cells are used for bone marrow transplantations and to treat blood-related diseases. Read more.

October 2011, I-Parent Magazine

Baby Basics

What Are the Pros and Cons? As you consider the option of banking your baby's amniotic fluid, weigh the pros and cons for yourself and keep these points in mind: • The greatest advantage to preserving amniotic fluid cells is that your child will have access to cells that are fully compatible with his or her own body, if the need arises. • Although there is no guarantee, the amniotic fluid preserved offers other blood relatives a high probability of a match, if needed. • There are initial and ongoing costs associated with banking stem cells. Although current uses for mesenchymal stem cells are limited, the uses could expand rapidly if technological advances with amniotic stem cells are similar to recent advances with cord stem cells. Preserving and storing your baby's amniotic fluid stem cells could potentially offer your child, and other members of your immediate family, an opportunity to benefit from these advances in medical treatments. For more information, speak with your health care professional so that you may make an educated decision about banking amniotic fluid.

Kids Want Their Parents to be Less Stressed Out Children Focus on Quality vs. Quantity of Time

Busy parents spend much of their time feeling guilty over the lack of quality time they spend with their kids, with work, household duties, multiple children, and day-to-day chores filling their day. But is the feeling reciprocated by the kids? Surprisingly, the answer, is "not so much." Only 10 percent of children in third grade through their senior year wished for more time with their mom and 15.5 percent with their dad. So what do children actually want then? Thirty-four percent of children wish their mothers and 27.5 percent wish their fathers would be less tired and stressed out. Simply put, they want their folks to "chill out!" Another insight from the study is that it doesn't seem to matter to kids whether or not parents work or stay at home full-time or a parttime basis. Instead, children pick up on parents being too pooped to participate in things and not maintaining that work-life balance that is so important to a well-adjusted family. October 2011, I-Parent Magazine

Family Finances

The Power of Our Dollar By: Chrystal Saunders

The most precious moment of my day is walking in the door and hearing my boys racing to the door to see who can be the first to jump into my arms. Wow, what a feeling! Yes my boys are at the age where me coming home is still a cool thing, and I’m sure that will change over the years as it did for me and my father. Still today, I embrace excitedly some of the financial principles my father instilled in me and I smile each time I remember his wisdom. The biggest principle he taught me is to never spend more than I earn. Simple. To the point. Not so easy. We live in a world today that demands we please ourselves, our spouses, our children, and our image. It’s a challenge to walk into Zellers or WalMart today and

get through the store without your children looking at you with hopeful eyes that they might get something “special”…something that quickly finds its way to the bottom of the toy box. But how do we say no to that look, and better yet how do we teach them the value of an earned dollar and the power that it has to control us or help us? Today I want to unwrap that power of a dollar and how we can teach that to our children. It’s invaluable to know the difference between a need and a want and talking with our children in simple economic principles. A need is food, shelter, and clothing. Moving forward from that…do we buy ramen noodles for dinner, or do we go to the finest restaurant in town? Do we rent a small apartment or do we live in a mansion on the water? Do we shop at Salvation Army or do we go to the fine clothiers in the fancy shopping center? Help your children define in needs and wants how to know what is prudent and what isn’t is extremely important. Thinking through that from my father’s advice, it’s all based on your income. You make a little and you live on less. You make a lot and you live on less.

Either way there is distance between your expense and income, and that distance is in your favor.

The biggest principle he taught me is to never spend more than I earn

Practical ways to help your children understand your thought process when you purchase things is a really fun exercise. Surprisingly you start making better financial decisions when you have to justify it to your children. Say you are at McDonalds and you are trying to decide between the happy meal and the value meal and you explain that by ordering three items off the value meal (value fries, cheeseburger, and small drink) for $3.00 versus spending $4 on the happy meal, you have the power of another dollar still in your pocket. The next logical question is what is the power of that dollar! It still amazes me the time value of money. Albert Einstein referred to compound interest as the eighth wonder of the world and it truly is amazing. Realize for a second that a dollar invested today is worth thirty two dollars just thirty-five years from now. (Average rate of return in the market is about 7% over that time period). I know it is not an easy thing to tell your son or daughter that you aren’t getting a happy meal with a toy, but if you help them understand that by you saving that one dollar and setting it aside later for them that when they are 40 it will be $32 or when they are 75 it’s $4,096. Truly a wonder. Just imagine if you didn’t go to McDonald’s and you got the ramen noodles! In summary there are really two thoughts. Spend less than you make and save the difference. If you do that you’ll find yourself getting ahead financially. Take your children to the grocery store and talk to them about why you pick one thing off the shelf and not another. Just last night I asked my five year old as we were looking at red onions which one was a better buy. He looked at the price per pound and promptly answered correctly. Have fun with your kids, do math in the grocery store, but never forget to tell them why it is important to know where your money goes. We worked hard for that dollar and we can make that dollar work hard for us, but if you’re not careful, the longing for what the world tells us will creep in and we’ll soon find we are strapped too tight or we don’t have enough money left over each month to save. I leave you with one last challenge, what legacy will you leave for your children? October 2011- I-Parent Magazine

Toddler to Preschool

10Things Toddlers Know and Adults room through his eyes – in the dark. Silhouettes of items on a shelf or dresser may seem terribly frightening. The ticking of his clock, whirring of the ceiling fan and humming of the furnace are easily envisioned as monsters under the bed. To a 2 year -old, going into a dark room is very scary. It is not instinctive to walk calmly into the unknown. Age and maturity usually ease his fears of the dark, but adding a night light can be the difference between bedtime tears or pleasant dreams.

It’s too cold

His Goldilocks complex may seem perplexing; however did you know that the water in the shower feels colder to a three foot tall toddler than it does to a six foot tall adult? If you’re convinced that his complaints are a tactic to avoid acquainting his hard earned dirty elbows and knees with a bar of soap, try sitting down in the shower tomorrow morning. You’ll see that it is cooler down at his level than when you’re standing up closer to the shower head.

They honestly don’t know!

The terrible twos and trying threes can be wildly confusing for some parents. Between trying to potty train, transitioning from babyish to childlike behavior, and coming to terms with the fact that your baby is becoming an independent person, the keenly unique toddler perspective can send a parent over the edge. Toddlers have their own viewpoint of the world that they live in. They are playful, highly imaginative and extremely inquisitive. The unending barrage of toddler buzz words such as ‘why’ and ‘no’ coupled with his unwavering desire to put anything and everything into the DVD can leave the most resilient parent scratching his head. Enjoying your child’s toddler years can be achieved if you consider his perspective. Your toddler’s outlook is one that maturity forces adults to temper. Understanding this gives you insight into what motivates him to react with his enthusiastic flair. Looking at the world through his eyes actually helps you to see him.

Have you ever regretted asking him why he did something, only to be stonewalled with a wideeyed “I don’t know”? The painful truth is that they really don’t know. They don’t know why cutting their bangs two days before the family portrait or giving the cat a mud bath is appealing. They just know that it is. Acting impulsively is typical in children, and your toddler is no exception. His curiosity overpowers any reason that he is developing. While he may know that he is not to cram a waffle into the DVD, his curious nature is urging him to find out if it an actually fit.

Ketchup is one of the food groups.

Countless, have quietly argued with their children in restaurants not to douse their scrambled eggs or fries in an unending sea of ketchup. His refusal to eat anything

There are monsters in the room.

The next time he deploys the “I’m scared of the dark” routine to stall bedtime, take a moment to see his October 2011- I-Parent Magazine

Toddler to Preschool

unless it’s soaked with ketchup is the perfect time to adopt the ‘pick and chose your battles’ strategy. Other than risking your loss of appetite, his ketchup dependency will probably lessen somewhat with age and isn’t harmful. Consider that if he’s dipping very bite of chicken or mashed potatoes in ketchup, he’s still eating the food.

Taking the time to explain in age-appropriate terms helps everyone understand the boundaries.

It is that bad.

Coming inside to take a bath, sitting patiently waiting for the pediatrician, and taking medicine are all acts that adults methodically perform. When toddlers have to exercise control over their emotions or be redirected to focus their behaviour, they are aware Bugs are cool. they don’t have full control over the situation. ExThe widespread fascination that society has with pressing his emotions through crying or verbalizing aliens is similar to a toddler’s interest in crawling how unfair your decision is temporarily gives him critters. Bugs are extremely fascinating to young back control. Acknowledging that you understand he children because they seldom see them in their thinks it’s horrible to wash his hair shows you respect house. his feelings. When he’s playing in the garden or at the park, it’s tempting to unearth creatures as he realizes The bathroom is a playground. that he’s not the only species in existence. A Parents frequently wonder why their children are obtoddler’s innocence usually prevents him from sessed with being in the bathroom at almost any time developing the fear, phobia or disgust of insects, other than to clean up. To your toddler the bathroom and his intent to please sends him running to is a room full of billowy paper, blocks, all which seem you to show off his latest discovery. to be strategically placed for his enjoyment. He doesn’t use an entire role of toilet paper to mummify his Why ask why? teddy bear to be disobedient. His creative imaginaUnderstanding the unknown is very difficult for tion sees the toilet paper as the perfect wrap to heal young children. Although occasionally he’ll purhis bear’s broken arm. sue the ‘why’ line of questioning just to be adorably testy, more often than not he isn’t try- Setting aside your adult perception and maturity to see his point of view allows you to see the beautifully ing to be irritating. He actually does wonder why. Questions that are not easily explained innocent world your toddler sees. Accepting that he without a lengthy scientific explanation such as has a unique perspective helps you to cherish this “why is the sky blue” or “why can’t I fly like the stage. Embrace his curious spirit and tenacious nabirds” are genuine issues your toddler is strugture because before you know it, he’ll be asking to gling to understand. Quite simply, he’ll persist borrow the keys to your car. asking why because he doesn’t understand the answer. Answering him honestly instead of quickly can often satisfy his interest and end his interrogation.

Imaginary friends do drink tea.

Pity the parent who inadvertently forgets to pour one of their child’s imaginary tea part guests a fresh cup of hot cocoa or juice. A toddler’s limited social experience is enhanced through a variety of interaction. Subconsciously mimicking social scenarios in his play helps him gain social confidence. If your tot takes the time to set up a luncheon only to have one of his guests slighted, he feels he’s failed at hosting a good party. Serving and occasionally drinking multiple cups of imaginary tea help him to develop social skills.

You didn’t say not to…

Exact words and explanations can be critical to toddlers. Children are surprisingly quite literal at this stage of development. Stating not to put doll clothes on the cat but omitting not to dress the dog can be interpreted as the freedom to do exactly that.

October 2011- I-Parent Magazine

Education

School Day Solutions

The Elementary Years By Alesha Almata

Be a Classroom volunteer. Be a Reading Volunteer in the Classroom

Get Involved In Your kids Lives – Volunteer

or library. Help with classroom assignments in the classroom. Practice Math facts. Lead a reading group. Help the teacher behind the scenes - grade papers, decorate the classroom, make copies. Even if you don’t have a regular time to devote to your volunteer service each week, you can still be involved in your child’s classroom. You can coordinate birthday parties, holiday parties, you can volunteer to accompany the class on a field trip, share your expertise through a classroom presentation, attend Career Day, choose to volunteer in another classroom with the Art or Music teachers. Some times it is better not to volunteer in you child’s classroom. Some little ones have a difficult time paying attention when Mom or Dad is there. Or, more likely, your children have gotten to the age where your presence in their classroom is not welcomed and you may gently (or not so gently) be asked by your youngster to leave. Even in these stages, there is still a place at your child’s school. You can work in the library shelving books or logging them in, help students navigate the internet, help man the front desk, organize mailing to student families, perform a number of clerical activities, help at the annual book fair, be a judge at the science fair. Volunteer for the many committees that welcome or require parent involvement.

By: Joan Gallata

Every child faces challenges with a new school year. Maybe it’s a new teacher, changing classes for the first time, or nerves about learning and remembering a locker combination. Whatever situation your child might be struggling with, the suggestions below can help calm anxieties and get the school year off to a positive start. Challenge: A New Teacher Solution: Develop a relationship with the teacher. Have a meeting with him or her as soon as possible. This will allow you to share your positive feelings about your child with the teacher and vice versa. Also, stay involved and volunteer when you can. This ongoing relationship will show you trust and like your child’s new teacher, making it easier for your child to feel the same way. If your child is in elementary school, have him prepare a handmade card or pick flowers to bring as an icebreaker. This will be an easy excuse to introduce himself to his new teacher. If your child is in middle school and will have multiple teachers, tell him to introduce himself to each new instructor as he enters the room. This way if he’s called on in class, it won’t be his first interaction with the teacher and will soothe his nerves. Also, teach your child to be positive – a few lessons in relaxation techniques may come in handy if your child is still feeling anxious. Deep breathing and telling herself “I can do this” are both good options that help.

The opportunities to get in your child’s “other” lives are endless and our volunteerism leads to unexpected results. In addition to encouraging higher academic achievement, we are also creating an unbreakable bond between our children and ourselves.

October 2011- I-Parent Magazine

Education

Teacher’s Tips for Keeping in Touch By IP staff

Want to give your child the best experience possible? Team up with her teacher! Don't be discouraged from coming into class because "you're not educated enough" or because you don't feel you have anything to contribute — your child's teacher would love to strengthen the bond between school and home. How do you strengthen that bond? Read on for teachers' tips.

Talk to your child every day about school

Respect the schedule. When there's an

Read everything that comes home.

Spend time in the classroom. Not only are

— it's a great way to find out what he's learning and to identify potential problems that you might need to discuss with his teacher. Start a conversation with "What was your favorite activity today?" instead of "How was school today?" to avoid vague answers.

Most teachers send daily or weekly information in agendas with info about class projects and field trips and requests for parent volunteers. But it's easy for your child to forget to pass them on to you, so check her backpack regularly, and find out if there's a particular day of the week when your teacher sends flyers home.

Communicate. Send a note or schedule a con-

ference at the beginning of the year, and let your child's teacher know about anything unusual that's going on in your child's life that might affect him at school — from crises like illness and divorce to less drastic changes, like a grandmother moving in or a mother getting a new job. Mention any medication your child uses, even if he doesn't take it at school. But don't take problems to the principal unless you've already talked to your child's teacher.

Be a cheerleader! Don't just focus on problem

emergency, don't hesitate to call the school at any time. For more routine matters, it's smart to find out early in the year when the best times are to contact teachers. Ask at back-to-school night, or send a note or email in the first week.

parent volunteers "worth their weight in gold" to teachers, paying regular visits to the classroom is also a great way for you to learn about your child's experience firsthand. Offer to tutor individual students or help with special projects. You can also chaperone on field trips, give a talk on your career or your cultural background, or teach the class how to make a special dish or art project.

Bring learning home. Find ways to relate

everyday activities at home to concepts your child is learning in school. For instance, explain percentages at breakfast using the nutritional info on the back of cereal boxes, or talk about the fat content of skim versus two-percent milk.

Don't be afraid. Your child's teacher wants to hear from you. Of all people, teachers understand that there's no such thing as a stupid question, so ask away!

areas — let your child's teacher know about his strengths too. You'll help her to think of new ways to engage him.

October 2011- I-Parent Magazine

Education

WHAT IF MY CHILD HAS TROUBLE LEARNING? By: Donna de Levante Raphael “Parents, kids and teachers need to know that a learning disorder is not a prelude to failure,” says Rob Langston, an advocate for the learning disabled. Some questions to ask: Is there a history of learning trouble in your family? – a mother who never tested as well, an uncle with a reading problem such as dyslexia? By investigating, you may discover learning disorders in your family tree that can help explain what’s going on with your little one. Does your youngster reverse letters or numbers? If your child is between 7 and 11 and still experiences this problem, have her tested. You may have a learning disorder. If you have your child tested:



Make sure the evaluation is complete. There are typically 20 to 30 different tests involved, says Langston, that are structured to identify broad variances in skill levels. But schools don’t always administer the entire battery of tests. Wherever there are problems, discrepancies will show up.



If you decide to have your child tested by an outside source (such as a trained neuropsychologist or clinical psychologist specializing in learning disabilities), share the results with your school, it will help the staff put together an individualized plan for him.



Should your child be diagnosed with a learning disability, don’t take is personally, lose motivations or get too bogged down in the problem. “it’s all about your attitude,” says Langston. “Know that dealing with the situation can be a struggle, but it will be okay.”

October 2011- I-Parent Magazine

Go Green Family Fun Ideas 1. Encourage your kids to be â&#x20AC;&#x153;nature sleuthsâ&#x20AC;? and help them develop their own detective kit with magnifying glass, paper, and pencil to record interesting things they see in the backyard (e.g., insects, birds, leaves, spider webs, etc.).

Have a sound-pollution free day at home and unplug! No radios, televisions, CDs, computer games, iPods, etc.

Plant a garden of flowers and/or vegetables in your yard together as a family.

Put up window bird feeders so you and your children can easily watch the variety of birds that will visit.

Take your kids on a field trip to the local nature center and participate in an environmental education program together.

Participate as a family in local clean-up projects, like Adopt-A-Highway, park, or stream clean-

Complain about the weather less; appreciate the outdoors more.

ing.

Put out weather instruments; thermometer, barometer, rain gauge, etc., in your yard and monitor them together as a family.

Catch run-off water from your roof in a rain barrel to water flowers in your garden, teaching your children of green life style.

10.

Put up signs to remind family members to turn off lights to conserve energy.

October 2011- I-Parent Magazine

Tween & Teen Power

My Teenâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Body Image and Self-Esteem By IP Staff Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;m fat. I'm too skinny. I'd be happy if I were taller, shorter, had curly hair, straight hair, a smaller , bigger muscles, longer legs. Do any of these statements sound familiar? Are you used to putting yourself down? If so, you're not alone. As a teen, you're going through a ton of changes in your body. And as your body changes, so does your image of yourself. Lots of people have trouble adjusting, and this can affect their self-esteem.

Why Are Self-Esteem and Body Image Important? Self-esteem is all about how much people value themselves, the pride they feel in themselves, and how worthwhile they feel. Self-esteem is important because feeling good about yourself can affect how you act. A person who has high self-esteem will make friends easily, is more in control of his or her behavior, and will enjoy life more. Body image is how someone feels about his or her own physical appearance. For many people, especially those in their early teens, body image can be closely linked to self-esteem. That's because as kids develop into teens, they care more about how others see them.

The changes that come with puberty can affect how both girls and guys feel about themselves. Some girls may feel uncomfortable or embarrassed about their maturing bodies. Others may wish that they were developing faster. Girls may feel pressure to be thin but guys may feel like they don't look big or muscular enough.

Outside Influences

It's not just development that affects self-esteem, though. Many other factors (like media images of skinny girls and bulked-up guys) can affect a person's body image too. Family life can sometimes influence self-esteem. Some parents spend more time criticizing their kids and the way they look than praising them, which can reduce kids' ability to develop good self-esteem. People also may experience negative comments and hurtful teasing about the way they look from classmates and peers. Sometimes racial and ethnic prejudice is the source of such comments. Although these often come from ignorance, sometimes they can affect someone's body image and self-esteem.

What Influences a Person's Self-Esteem? Puberty

Some teens struggle with their self-esteem when they begin puberty because the body goes through many changes. These changes, combined with a natural desire to feel accepted, mean it can be tempting for people to compare themselves with others. They may compare themselves with the people around them or with actors and celebs they see on TV, in movies, or in magazines. But it's impossible to measure ourselves against others because the changes that come with puberty are different for everyone. Some people start developing early; others are late bloomers. Some get a temporary layer of fat to prepare for a growth spurt, others fill out permanently, and others feel like they stay skinny no matter how much they eat. It all depends on how our genes have programmed our bodies to act.

October 2011- I-Parent Magazine

Healthy Self-Esteem

If there are things about yourself that you want to change and can (such as how fit you are), do this by making goals for yourself. For example, if you want to get fit, make a plan to exercise every day and eat nutritious foods. Then keep track of your progress until you reach your goal. Meeting a challenge you set for yourself is a great way to boost self-esteem!

If you have a positive body image, you probably like and accept yourself the way you are. This healthy attitude allows you to explore other aspects of growing up, such as developing good friendships, growing more independent from your parents, and challenging yourself physically When you hear negative comments coming from and mentally. Developing these parts of yourself within yourself, tell yourself to stop. Try building can help boost your self-esteem. your self-esteem by giving yourself three compliments every day. While you're at it, every evening A positive, optimistic attitude can help people develop strong self-esteem — for example, say- list three things in your day that really gave you pleasure. It can be anything from the way the sun ing, "Hey, I'm human" instead of "Wow, I'm felt on your face, the sound of your favorite band, such a loser" when you've made a mistake, or or the way someone laughed at your jokes. By not blaming others when things don't go as exfocusing on the good things you do and the posipected. tive aspects of your life, you can change how you Knowing what makes you happy and how to feel about yourself. meet your goals can help you feel capable, strong, and in control of your life. A positive attitude and a healthy lifestyle (such as exercising and eating right) are a great combination for GET HELP! building good self-esteem.

Where Can I Go if I Need Help?

Tips for Improving Your Body Image.

Sometimes low self-esteem and body image problems are too much to handle alone. A few teens may become depressed, lose interest in activities or friends — and even hurt themselves or resort to alcohol or drug abuse.

Some people think they need to change how they look or act to feel good about themselves. But actually all you need to do is change the way If you're feeling this way, it can help to talk to a parent, coach, religious leader, guidance counyou see your body and how you think about selor, therapist, or an adult friend. A trusted adult yourself. — someone who supports you and doesn't bring The first thing to do is recognize that your body you down — can help you put your body image in is your own, no matter what shape, size, or color perspective and give you positive feedback about your body, your skills, and your abilities. it comes in. If you're very worried about your weight or size, check with your doctor to verify If you can't turn to anyone you know, call a teen crisis hotline (check the yellow pages under social Next, identify which aspects of your appearance services or search online). The most important you can realistically change and which you thing is to get help if you feel like your body image can't. Everyone (even the most perfectand self-esteem are affecting your life. seeming celeb) has things about themselves that they can't change and need to accept — like their height, for example, or their shoe size.

October 2011- I-Parent Magazine

Feature

Growing Strong By: Ellen Notbohm and Patti Rawding-Anderson THE DO’S AND DON’TS TO HELP YOUR SPECIAL NEEDS CHILD BECOME A CAPABLE AND CONFIDENT ADULT It’s a beautiful vision on the horizon – your special-needs child all grown up, a capable and independent adult. When children are young, that horizon can seem very far away, indeed. How will you get there? What should you be doing now?

Do recognize that your child’s relationship with you and with all the members of your family will be the single strongest determinant of her success as an adult. See your child as a whole child, not a packet of issues or symptoms. Emphasize your child’s strengths, and use them to build her confidence in herself. Don’t let your child’s needs drive a wedge between her and the rest of the family. See your special child as a full-fledged member of your family – with needs, yes, but also with responsibilities to others. Don’t focus all of your attention on her in a manner that suggests that other members of the family are not equally important. Don’t sacrifice yourself or your family for the needs of one child, neglecting siblings who are also “works in progress.” Allow time for everyone, including yourself, to enjoy grandparents, cousins and friends. Too much focus on your special child may send a message to her that she is the hub of the wheel around which everyone else turns. That’s not the message that will serve her well in adulthood. Don’t neglect yourself. Taking time to nurture yourself is not selfish; its just the opposite. Let your child see you as a multidimensional adult who enjoys life, is involved in community, takes good care of her own health, allows herself to have fun, respite and recreation. This sets the best kind of example. Do praise your child’s efforts. Not the outcome or the result. Keep the focus on what she can do, rather than what she can’t do. Know that every child has the capacity to achieve more that what she is currently able to do, but that for your child, learning a skill may require more repetition and practice than it might for a typically developing child.

Do recognize that it is your responsibility to provide not only the opportunities for practice, but also to maintain patience throughout the learning process. Impatience, exasperation or “letting her learn the hard way” through humiliation or embarrassment will not help your child learn anything other than that he can’t trust you.

Do realize that children learn more eagerly

through fun. Your child will learn any skill much more quickly if you make it relevant to her life and her interests. There is always more than one way to accomplish a task. Find the ways that make sense to her.

Don’t “therapize” your child, filling her days

with rounds of adults who are all trying to fix something. Think about the message this sends to your child. Do involve yourself and your family in every creative way you can. Interact. Do what your child loves, and do it with her – practice motor skills, social skills and language skills by getting in the pool or the ball pit with her. Go to the zoo and the library and the park, play in the sandbox and the puddles.

Do throw out standard “measurement” assess-

ments such as growth charts or speech/cognitive/ motor milestones aimed at the general population. Don’t use “normal” as a measure of where your child should be. Do respect your child’s unique trajectory.

Do encourage your child to explore, to interact

with people, to laugh and be curious, and do it with the understanding that regardless of ability or disability, your child will grow and develop and flourish if his way and pace of learning are celebrated.

October 2011- I-Parent Magazine

Feature

What Not to Say to Your Kids When You Talk About Divorce or an Absent Parent By: Marianne Rogers

Do Make Sure Your Actions Support Your

Apply These Do's and Don'ts When You Talk About Your Kids' Questions

Words - This one is tricky. We all know that actions speak louder than words, and nowhere in our lives is this more true

When You Talk With Kids About Divorce or an

than with our kids. However, right

Absent Parent:

now, you're hurting; and you may find it extremely difficult to be patient and

Do Tell the Truth - Your children are extremely

caring with your children, when every

perceptive. Do not attempt to lie to them or

fiber of your being is screaming for

withhold basic information. At the same

some space to grieve your loss. Try to

time, though, be aware of the fine line be-

be aware of whether the messages you

tween answering their questions and telling

are giving to your kids with your words

them more than they need to know.

match the messages you are giving them with your actions, and even your

Do Remain Positive - Your children will take their

body language. Being consistent in this

cues from you. Make every effort to remain

regard may mean that you have to

positive and upbeat, and you'll find that

occasionally schedule some time away

your attitude is contagious. The changes

from your kids, so that you can sort

you are making in your life right now may

through your own feelings and return

not be the ones that you would have

home with renewed energy and re

wanted, but life is an adventure, and to-

solve.

gether you're going to make the best of it.

Do Be Patient - You may find that your child asks the same questions over and

Do Remind Your Children That You Love Them

over. This doesn't necessarily mean

Unconditionally - This is absolutely critical. Even if

that you aren't explaining the answers

your kids aren't hinting that they have questions about whether you could ever fall "out of love" with them, tell them explicitly over and over again that you will always love them, no matter what they do. You want them to know that there is absolutely nothing that could ever stop you from loving them!

clearly enough. Children often need to hear the same information many times in order for it to make sense in their own minds. In fact, many children will replay these important conversations, while they are resting or playing, and knowing that they have the answers and sequence correct in their minds can be very reassuring. October 2011- I-Parent Magazine

Feature

Things You Should Avoid When Answering Your Kids' Questions When You Talk With Kids About Divorce or an Absent Parent: Don't Speak Negatively About the Other Parent - Being a product of yourself and

outright that some of these details are adult in nature, and while you want to answer all of their questions, there are some details that you will not discuss.

Don't Expect Your Child to Take Sides - It's nice to have people around

the other parent, your children will not be

you who agree with you and support

able to separate negative words spoken

your decisions and actions. However,

about the other parent from their impres-

that supportive role is not one that your

sions of your feelings about them. So as an-

children should fill. Save that for your

gry as you might feel toward the other par-

adult friendships. Remember that this is

ent right now, remember that criticizing him

not about taking sides. Regardless of

or her in front of your children will feel to

how wrong you feel your ex's behavior

them, either subconsciously or consciously,

and decisions have been, your child will

as though you are criticizing them as indi-

- one some level - still desire to have a

viduals, not just the other parent, with

relationship with him or her, and you

whom you may be legitimately angry.

can support your child by being suppor-

Don't Change the Subject or Avoid the Conversation - Honor your children's need to discuss their questions. This is natural and should not be avoided or discouraged. In addition, you may find that your children will ask certain questions again and again. Try to empathize with their need to familiarize themselves with as many details as they can, and be patient when they approach you with the same questions you discussed yesterday.

Don't Share Inappropriate Details - Respect that your children do not need - and should not be privy to - the specific details leading up to your breakup. Keep those details to yourself when responding to their to

tive of that continuing relationship.

Don't Talk About Child Support Finally, child support is an adult concern. Your children have no control over when and if those child support checks will arrive, so spare them the details when your ex's child support checks are late or altogether missing. Keep in mind, too, that your children are most likely already well aware of your ex's shortcomings in this regard, and outwardly blaming him or her in front of your children will only make them feel unnecessarily responsible for this adult matter.

their questions. In addition, if you feel they are pressing you for more information than you are prepared to share, tell your children October 2011- I-Parent Magazine

Daddy Life

THE DADDY LIFE: My Park Rules By: Paul Humphrey

Every parent has his or her own unwritten rules for the playground There are some unwritten rules for taking kids to a playground. The problem with unwritten rules are, that not everyone knows they exist. So for the public good, I’ve decided to write down some of these implicit rules as I’ve observed them. These guidelines are based on hundreds of hours logged in public parks in the past three years with my two preschoolers.

#1 – Your child is going to get knocked down when playing with other children. Don’t overreact. #2 – Your child is going to inadvertently knock down somebody else. Apologize and move on. #3 – It’s ok to acknowledg-e- other parents at the playground with a head nod, smile or a simple “hello.” If you see the same parent at the same park on more than one occasion, it’s acceptable to ask their child’s name, age and school. #4 – If you bring snacks to the playground and be prepared to share. Feeding kids in public is like feeding pigeons. Hand out one Goldfish cracker and before long, a dozen toddlers will surround you with outstretched arms. #5 – The swings are a gauntlet for kids just learning to walk. The Frankenstein walkers will inevitably wander in front of the swing set. Then, it’s a matter of luck and timing whether or not, they get clobbered by an older kid who’s attempting to swing into orbit. #6 – Keep your phone calls and texting to minimum. You can’t pay attention to your kids and take an important phone call at the same time. It’s even more annoying when the phone call is unnecessary and/or inappropri-ate. Nobody wants to be within earshot as you discuss your Las Vegas weekend or ingrown toenails. #7 – Dogs belong in dog parks, not people parks. Plenty of kids are scared of dogs. So don’t tell me how “friendly” your unleashed dog is when he walks up to my kid on the playground and starts sniffing his ear. Having your canine’s teeth inches from my kids face isn’t cool. #8 – Ideally, teenagers and pre-teens would have their own playground-s- that offer free wireless Internet and Clearasil. Until that happens, older kids are going to hang out at the same playgrounds- as toddlers and preschoole-rs.- This can make for an odd mix, but don’t be intimidate-d.- Usually pointing out to misbehavin-g- teens that they’re passing on bad habits to younger kids is enough to send them on their way. #9 – Leave the lightsaber-s,- Nerf guns and pony figurines at home. If you show up at the  playground with these sought-aft-er- toys other kids are going to want to play with them. It’s a  scenario that inevitably ends with somebody in tears. #10 –Don’t assume the dad at the playground is either unemployed and/or using his children as

bait to pick up women. There’s a good chance that dad could be me. And, I’m there on official business. First, I’m trying to wear out my two energetic sons. Second, I’m observing and reporting the unwritten rules of the playground-.

October 2011- I-Parent Magazine

The Hip Mom

Mommy Burnout: By: IP Staff

20 Ways to Recharge in Only 20 Minutes

Salary.com calculates that moms do work worth a salary equivalent of $117,856 per year. For working moms, the amount is equally impressive: $71,860 on top of the salary a mom already earns. But what can’t be measured in money is the value of a few sacred moments of peace, quiet and selfreflection, which is often what busy moms crave most. Perhaps what an overtired mom needs to appreciate herself is not so much a price tag on her efforts but a regular habit of slowing down and doing less. Mommy burnout can be addressed when you seize whatever moments of self-care you can, whenever the opportunities arise. So next time life gives you 20 minutes, don’t waste a single moment complaining that it’s not enough time. Jump right into one of these relaxing rituals instead, and you’ll find that the cure for mommy burnout was in within your grasp all along:

1. Enjoy the perfect cup of tea and your favorite tea biscuits while daydreaming by an open window. 2.

Get your heart rate up with a brisk walk around your neighbourhood. As you walk, shake those baby-toting kinks out of your arms and shoulders.

Write four fanciful postcards to your dearest faraway friends. Or find the four pettiest pieces of notepaper and write a note with the most grown-up pen in the house.

4. Flip through that old stack of magazines you never have time to read. Tear out the pages with articles that interest you, staple them, and keep them in a magazine holder for grabbing on the way out the door. Read in the passenger seat, while waiting in the line at the grocery store, or anywhere else when you have a few minutes of down time. 5. Set your PVR to record your favouriite funny sitcoms. Save them for viewing when you really need a laugh. Shut the door, turn out the lights, and enjoy fastforwarding through the commercials. Ahhh. 6. Pick up the phone and call your best friend. Tell her about your perfect day and ask about hers.

7. Sit outside under a tree. Listen. Write what you hear in a poem. 8. In your journal, write your idea of the perfect day. Start with how you would like to wake up and proceed hour by hour until the bedtime ritual. Be as descriptive as possible. 9. Close the shades, put on your iPod, find your favourite dance music, and get down. Don’t stop until your stress and strain shimmy away. 10. Take a mini-vacation to a foreign land – spend $10 at an ethnic market, on something you would never ordinarily buy. 11. Flip through your childhood photos Or family photo albums. Reminiscing helps us remember what it was like to view the world through innocent eyes. 12. More fun with old magazines. Make a collage of images that represent your future hopes and goals. Don’t hold back. Dream big! 13. Buy yourself inexpensive bunches of flowers and arrange them in your prettiest vases. 14. Be a rock star or a calypso queen. Sing in the shower as loudly as you like. Buy soaps and shampoos that inspire you. October 2011- I-Parent Magazine

The Hip Mom

15. Turn on some soothing music, fire up as many candles as you can find, dim the light, and sink into a sumptuous bubble bath. 16. Engage your inner child – finger paint, play with clay, or colour with crayons. Focus on the fun of the process, not the quality of the product. 17. Write a gratitude list for all that you have. Then write a second for all the things you wish you had, as though you already have them. 18. Soak your feet in a warm bath for five minutes. Push the cuticles back with an orange stick and apply two coats of your brightest, most cheerful nail polish to your toes. Be quick, they’ll need a few minutes to dry. 19. Set your alarm clock for 20 minutes, lie down and count backwards from 100. When you’re alarm goes off, you’ll be rested and refreshed, whether you fell asleep or not. 20. Once you’ve found your favourite ways to briefly rekindle and relax, post your top five where you’ll see them, lie on the fridge or next to the bathroom mirror. When you steal 20 minutes for yourself, you make life a little brighter for the whole family. Make it a habit and you’ll see.

October 2011- I-Parent Magazine

Together Time

International Travel with Kids By: IP Staff

lying Internationally with your kids can be less stressful than you think if you are prepared. Have you decided on a destination? Although there is a good chance that you may want to stay in the United States, there is also a chance that you would like to travel to a foreign country. Not only could it be a fun and exciting vacation, but it could also be a learning experience for your kids.

Once you and your family have decided that a visit to a foreign country is just the way that you want to spend your next family vacation, you will have to start making travel arrangements. This involves choosing a final vacation destination, booking airline reservations, and overnight hotel accommodations. After these travel arrangements have been made, you will need to wait for the “big day,” to arrive. However, once that day comes, it is important to remember that you are traveling with children. For that reason, extra accommodations may need to be made.

In international airports, passenger screening is just as important as baggage screening. For that reason, your child, no matter what their age, will also have to be checked out. This mostly entails removing their shoes and walking through a metal detector. In the event that the alarm sounds, your child will likely be subject to additional screening. However, it is important to note that this additional screening is required and it is the same that all other passengers will go through, if need be. Just remember you and your child have rights and they must be adhered to during this process.

It's best if you determine what these accommodations are before your flight is scheduled to take off. In fact, it is advised that you start preparing for your trip early, especially if you are traveling with children. This is because, when it comes to international flights, the preparation, even for children, is different than domestic flights. You will find that, in most cases, the guidelines and procedures change. For starters, the proof of identification that they will need drastically changes.

The above mentioned situations are just a few of the many that you will have to prepare for if you are flying internationally with a child. The rules, restrictions, and guidelines that you must follow tend to vary from international airport to airport, as well as with airlines. Although many of these rules are the same, there are some differences. All international airports are given the ability to add-on their own air travel rules, if they choose to do so.

When minor children fly on domestic flights, they do not need to show identification, if they are traveling with a parent or a guardian. Often times, proof of a parent’s identification is enough; however, it is not enough on international flights. Depending on where you are traveling to, you will find that your child may need to have a passport. If your child does not already have a passport, they will need to get one. This process could take a few days, or even a few weeks. While arranging your child’s passport, is also advised that ensure that yours is valid as well. In addition to having the proper forms of identification, for international flights, you will also find that your child or children must go through the same security screening as everyone else. This means that they will have their carryon luggage, as well as their checked baggage thoroughly examined. This examination may include an x-ray screening or a hand check. Should a problem arise, they will likely be pulled aside, like any other passenger. The only difference is that you should be able to accompany them, if and when this does occurs.

For that reason, it is advised that you directly contact the international airline that you will be flying with or the international airport that you will be leaving from, for additional information.

October 2011- I-Parent Magazine

Feature

Long-Distance Grandparent Survival Guide By: P.B. de Levante

Our columnist has had the kids around the corner and across the ocean. Here's what she's learned: I've had it every which way: Grandchildren in my neighborhood, grandchildren on the other side of the Atlantic, grandchildren across Canada and the United States. In each instance, the same grandchildren. My heart has been broken. I have cried into my pillow. I have longed to live in simpler times (but with indoor plumbing) when families weren't scattered willy-nilly across the globe.. Alas. Now, my two granddaughters, two grandsons and their parents are back on the opposite shore of the Atlantic, and I have given up making predictions about where they'll set up house next. My choice, as I see it, is to go with the flow â&#x20AC;&#x201D; or shoot myself. I'm opting for the former. Here are some things I try to bear in mind to avoid the latter.

1. There will be challenges no matter how near â&#x20AC;&#x201D; or far away â&#x20AC;&#x201D; I live from the grandkids. I hear all the time from grandparents who live around the corner from their offspring's offspring and complain that, although they adore the kids, they frequently feel exhausted and put upon. Alternatively, I hear from local grandparents who, for all intents and purposes, are barred from seeing their grandkids and might as well live an ocean away.

October 2011- I-Parent Magazine

Feature

Then there are the grandparents who relocate to be near the grandkids, but end up pining for their former lives and friends. This underscores my hunch thatâ&#x20AC;Ś

2. Life, at best, is highly imperfect.

No matter what your situation or your proximity to your adult children, their spouses and kids, there are bound to be disappointments, mixed signals, unfulfilled expectations, hurt feelings â&#x20AC;&#x201D; and all the other emotions (joy included) common in relationships among members of our species. One plus of living far away is that everyone tends to suck it up and be on their very best behavior during visits.

3. TGFS (Thank God for Skype). I know, I know, it's not ideal. Seeing the kids on a computer screen is not the same as hugging, snuggling, tickling, or kissing them, but it is an enormous improvement over mere phone calls, especially when the little ones can't yet carry on a conversation. Face time matters. And on Skype, books may be read, games played, songs sung â&#x20AC;&#x201D; all of which help create a sense of continuity between visits. This is especially critical in families where frequent close encounters are prohibitively expensive, physically challenging, or otherwise difficult to arrange.

4. Keep the faith. Your grandchildren will know you. Really. This is key. When Isabelle, my first granddaughter, was so rudely snatched by her parents and moved from my zip code in Washington, D.C., to Paris, I was a puddle on the floor. I despaired that she would have more of a relationship with her local croissant baker (she is a croissant fiend) than with me. Not so. Children are people with memories who reserve a special place in their hearts for grandparents. (We may feel competitive with the other grandparents, but kids are geniuses at making room for everybody, if given the chance.) During visits, I spend as much time as possible alone with each girl, then keep things going on Skype when I get home. (Needless to say, parental cooperation is also important.)

5. Life outside of grandchildren is essential to mental health. Even if you live next door to the grandkids and are an integral part of their daily lives, someday you are bound to feel like chopped liver if you make them the single, central focus of your life. They will start school, make friends, and get involved in all sorts of activities. This is the natural course of things, and at a certain point even their parents will be left in the dust. (Remember?) Love the kids, dote on them, be there for them to the degree that you can, but in the meantime don't forget to get a life. That said, I am slaving away over a hot stove learning to make the perfect croissant.

October 2011- I-Parent Magazine

Family Nutrition

The Kids Cooking Initiative By: Nora Camacho Imagine being able to improve your children's outlook on eating, cooking, and health in just a few hours each week. Imagine, at the same time, bettering their school performance and imparting years of family history, all while strengthening your relationship. In every issue we will include recipes you cook together with your kids, Grandkids or Great Grandkids. Let’s make this a reality.

Soba Noodles with Sesame Sauce and Steamed Veggies

Kids can help you make this Asian-inspired meal

This soba noodle dish is a healthy, Asian-inspired alternative to standard weeknight dinners. Incorporate your favorite seasonal vegetables and invite the whole family over — the recipe makes enough for 10. If the grandchildren are visiting, enlist their help with preparation. (Special directions for kids are included below.)

Ingredients:  1 (24 ounce) package soba noodles*  3/4 cup olive oil 1 teaspoon toasted sesame oil  1/4 cup maple syrup   1 tablespoon soy sauce  3 scallions, chopped, plus more for garnish 2-3 cloves garlic, minced   1 tablespoon minced ginger  2 tablespoons ginger juice**  2 clementines or 1 small navel orange, juiced 2 tablespoons rice vinegar  1-2 handfuls black sesame seeds, plus more for garnish  4 cups chopped vegetables of choice***, steamed  Black pepper, to taste

Directions:  Adult: Bring a very large pot of salted water to a boil and cook the soba noodles according to package instructions. Soba noodles absorb more water than most other pastas, so cook them in two batches or two pots if need be. Together: Pour the olive oil, sesame oil, maple syrup, soy sauce, scallions, garlic, ginger, ginger juice, orange juice, rice vinegar and the sesame seeds in a large bowl. Whisk until completely combined. Kid: Add the veggies to the sauce and toss well. Adult: When the noodles are ready, drain the in a colander. Add the noodles to your vegetables and sauce. Together: Let soba noodles cool for a few minutes before tossing with the sauce and season with pepper to taste. Sprinkle with black sesame seeds and chopped scallion for garnish. Notes: *Soba noodles are thin Japanese noodles made from buckwheat. They can be found in the ethnic food section or pasta section of most grocery stores. **To make the ginger juice, peel a large piece of ginger, about 4 inches long. Finely grate the ginger. Then, using a tea strainer or a fine mesh sieve over a bowl, press the grated ginger with your finger. The juice should fall into the bowl below. Kids can help squeeze out every bit of juice from the ginger. *** Any combination of chopped vegetables will work in this flexible dish, but broccoli, sugar snap peas, edamame, carrots, parsnips, sweet potatoes, or greens all go very well. October 2011- I-Parent Magazine

Feature

What are the advantages of bilingual-lism? By: Nora Camacho

“Giving your child an extra language is a gift for life!” Well is it? What exactly is the gift you are giving your child? Which life advantages will your child benefit from and are they worth your effort? Build your own opinion by browsing through the facts of advantages and disadvantages below. I will start by sharing with you the most important advantages based on latest research findings as well as experience of hundreds of parents and their bilingual children.   Exposure to another culture:   Learning another language has been shown to enhance cultural

understanding. Being able to speak to people from different countries and cultures exposes the child to different ways of thinking, different attitudes, habits and views. It also opens new doors. As a result, children learn early on that there is more than one way to everything.

Builds bridges to new relationships:   Communication is a core part of human relationships

and while young children certainly find and use many forms of non-verbal communication to interact and play with each other, language is a key enabler to new friendships. Speaking the language of those around you, is the bridge to connecting with them.

Potential economic advantages / career:   Many professions today require the command of a second or third language and those who master them, are certainly at an advantage over those who don't.   More flexible and divergent thinking:   Many studies have been carried out to determine the impact of bilingual up-bringing on thinking capabilities and the interesting result is that bilingual children think more flexibly. One of the explanations is that these children learn early on that there is more than one word to every concept, staying open for possibility.   Self-identity as a language or culture bridge:   Bilingual children not only act as a language or culture bridge, they also become very aware of their special gift. This consciousness transfers into their self-image and forms part of their self-identity, part of how they see themselves and how they define who they are.

Increased self-esteem & self-confidence:   Knowing more than one language helps your child to adapt easily to different language environments thereby increasing his/her self-esteem and self confidence.   Of course there are many more advantages. Parents report that their children are learning a third and fourth languages more easily, particularly when the new language shares a similar alphabet or language structure. Research has also shown that bilinguals develop superior writing and reading skills.   Looking across the whole list, there is no single most important advantage. Different people will judge them differently. However, the combination of them all points to THE most important advantage overall: becoming bilingual involves the whole child, not just his/her language. Becoming bilingual defines the identity of a child, his sense of security and status, his/her self -esteem and self-image and it boosts a child's self-confidence.

October 2011- I-Parent Magazine

Feature

Are there disadvantages? This article wouldn't be complete if I did not point out the few potential trade-offs you are about to make as you embark on your family's journey into bi-/multilingualism. But as you will see, these are rather minor compared to the list of advantages - some people wouldn't even call them disadvantages.    Your child might be starting to speak 3 - 6 months later:  You can expect your bilingual child to begin speaking about 3-6 months later than his/her monolingual peers. Monolingual children are expected to say their first 8-10 words around the age of 18 months and their first 2 word sentences around the age of 2 years. So you do the math. If your child doesn't start speaking even after the extra 3-6 months, it is time to consult a specialist and potentially check your child's hearing. Many children's delayed speech development is a result of hearing problems caused by infections, damaging noise levels or trauma - even if the hearing screening showed no defects at birth (see the appendix for a checklist on language development milestones).

Your child might mix languages temporarily: It is normal for bi-/multilingual children to mix up languages until about the age of 4. If children are lacking the right word in language A, they will borrow it from language B to communicate their message. There is nothing to worry and no action to take until that age. However, as parents we need to stay completely consistent and avoid creating sentences that start in one and end in another language. We act as role model to our children. If parents mix languages, children will do so too, and far beyond the age of 4.   Your child will face an added academic load: reading / writing:  If you want your children to not only speak another language but read and write in it, too, you will have to provide extra tuition beyond the regular school day. Only few schools provide this as part of the normal curriculum. Of course, you can decide to teach your child yourself. Whichever way you choose, for a minimum of 9-12 months your child will have to study for an extra 1-2 hours per week to acquire the additional skills to read and write in a second language.  It will require additional effort from YOU, the parents: Raising your child with a second

(third etc.) language is a gift as well as a commitment on your part. Different to a pottery or art class where you can participate for a couple of months, the decision to raise bilingual children is a commitment for a few years. It requires that you consistently work on providing language opportunities for your children spending time, money, creativity and consistently organize and re-organize your children's language exposure.   The last point is really the biggest and most important fact to be aware of. Committing to raising your children with more than one language will cost extra effort from you and sometimes, it can feel like quite a burden.   Deciding against bilingualism, however, is always a shame, particularly when it means for one parent, that their children will lose the connection to one parent's heritage and culture. “One of my workshop participants was almost in tears about her daughter not speaking her language "I felt as if she wasn't really my daughter, as if she wasn't mine. ”   Knowing that thousands of parents before you have gone the same way, will, no doubt, make you join in their final judgment:   ”The benefits are well worth the effort!”

October 2011- I-Parent Magazine

Family Health

Five Mistakes Most Parents Make That Can Contribute To Childhood Obesity By Dr. Renaldo Mortimer Over the past twenty years, childhood obesity rates have doubled, today approximately 15 percent of Canada’s children ages six to twelve are obese. An additional 30 percent are overweight. With nearly fifty percent of our children facing the added silent health dangers that come with carrying that extra weight, including hyper tension, heart disease and Type II diabetes, it’s time we, as parents take notice. The good news is that childhood obesity is preventable – especially if we start now – and we are the key to prevention. The first step on the road to prevention is recognizing the mistakes that most of us make that can lead to childhood obesity in our children and then rectify them. These mistakes include:

Thinking juice is a healthy alternative to soda.

on behaviour. Our kids then spend the rest of their lives trying to fight that conditioned response. Parents create the connection. None of those emotions has anything to do with physical hunger. Instead we use food to soothe emotional hunger. Instead, we need to reward and comfort our children with words and hugs, not food.

Making the dinner table a battleground and insisting that children finish everything on their plate. We’ve all heard it from our parents, “Finish your vegetables. Children are starving in…” But the truth of the matter is that forcing our children to finish everything on their plate doesn’t help the starving children, it only hurts our kids and our efforts to control the situation. One of the things we see is that our children who have problems with obesity have lost their internal cue to tell them that they are full. This loss is due to battles at the dinner table with children who are One of the things we see is forced to continue to eat after they feel full. Instead we need to make sure we’re serving the appropriate portions sizes and allow our children to stop eating once they’ve had enough.

Failing to recognize the detrimental effect our modern world has on our health.

“It’s the perfect example of a successful media campaign,” they have sold juice as a healthy alternative. But it’s not. It’s all sugar. There is a strong association between sweet drink consumption (including juice and sods) and overweight preschool children and the conclusion is that reducing consumption of these drinks might be one strategy to manage the weight of preschool children. Instead, we need to encourage our children to drink healthy liquids like low fat milk and water.

Using food as a reward for good behaviour or a job well done. Too often parents “use food as a reward”. They use it to celebrate successes. They use it to comfort ouchies. They use it to comfort emotional trauma. It’s an immediate positive stroke, so it has a very strong impact

Sure, genetics do influence our children’s susceptibility to being overweight or obese, but our environment plays a huge role, too. What happened after 1980? Our genetic makeup hasn’t changed, but obesity rates have skyrocketed. Health professionals place the blame squarely on our society. They point to our fascination with television, video and computer screens; our penchant for larger portion sizes; and our increasing lack of physical activity. Instead of following society’s lead, we need to limit tube time to the recommended two hours per day and model healthy living habits. October 2011- I-Parent Magazine

Family Health

Children usually mimic their parent’s exercise and eating patterns. That is why parents establishing healthy eating habits, such as eating smaller portions, keeping sweets and snack foods to a minimum, eating a good breakfast an eating whole foods – especially fruits and vegetables – versus packaged or fast foods is so important. Our best defense against increasing body mass and high cholesterol is exercise.

Trusting our eyes. You can’t visibly see overweight kids all the time. Some kids at risk for being overweight don’t have rolls of fat. We need to pay close attention to where these kids plot out on the BMI (Body Mass Index) graphs. Even if kids appear to be overweight to others, we, as parents, don’t often see it. Weight gain is hard for parents to see and acknowledge because it reflects a parenting quality that’s hard for us. Instead of feeling guilty, we parents need to identify our bad habits and change them for our good and the good of the whole family.

Healthy Tips

1 Encourage your child to drink healthy liquids.

2 Don’t use food as a reward.

3 Serve the appropriate portions sizes.

4 Increase physical activities.

5 Change the bad

habits to good habits.

October 2011- I-Parent Magazine

Single Parent World

Avoid Single Parent Burnout: 30 Self Care Strategies for Single Parents By: Donna de Levante Raphael

11. Read a magazine.

Because Taking Care of Yourself Helps You Take Care of Those You Love

12.Clean your house - it's a great stress reliever!

When we're busy taking care of others, one of the

13. Sit outside and breathe fresh air.

very first things we neglect is taking care of ourselves. For many single moms and dads, this can lead to single parent burnout. To avoid this, take some time today to do something just for you. It doesn't have to require a babysitter, and it doesn't have to take up much of your time. The simple act of practicing intentional self care can help you avoid single parent burnout, help you feel stronger, restore your sense of peace, and fill you with hope for what lies ahead.

14. Get up fifteen minutes early so you can linger over a cup of coffee. 15. Swap play dates with a neighbor so you can each enjoy a few minutes of solitude. 16. Bake a scrumptious dessert just for you. 17. Re-read something that has been especially encouraging to you. 18. Write in a Journal. 19. Go to a park and sit on the swings with your kids.

Self Care Strategies to Help You

20. Go to bed an hour early.

Avoid Single Parent Burnout:

21. Watch the sunset.

1. Take a long walk. 2. Check out a yoga video or DVD from your local library, and make time to do it twice a week. 3. Read a fiction book or short story that you can totally lose yourself in. 4. Write your life story. 5. Daydream.

22. Listen to soothing music. 23. Grow something, such as a house plant for fresh herbs. 24. Sit with a cup of hot chocolate or some hot tea. 25. Surround yourself with pictures of the people you love and things you care about.

6. Try a new recipe.

26. Give yourself permission to say "No" to something you really don't have time for or are not interested in.

7. Avoid single parent burnout by getting a babysitter and go to a movie alone.

27. Say "Yes" to something you'd really like to do!

8. Write a letter to a friend.

28. Express your creativity.

9. Smile.

29. Lend a hand to someone in need.

10. Set the timer, close your eyes, and breathe deeply for five minutes.

30. Hug your kids! October 2011- I-Parent Magazine

Back in the day……

CRAFT AND GAMES TO CELEBRATE GRANDPARENTS By: Patricia Garner

Grandparents are our heritage and are essential members of our families and communities. That is why we have a special day, National Grad Parents Day, is now an official day set aside on the second Sunday of September to honour them. Grandparents Day may not be declared a holiday in Canada however it still remains a special day worth celebrating. It’s sometimes hard for a child to envision a grandparent as a kid, but stories about life “way back when” help the child to connect to the family. You can help your child understand his own unique background or heritage by working on these activities together. On a world or Canadian map, place a sticker on each city, town or country where your ancestors lived. Rent or check out a DVD (from the library0 to view your ancestor’s homeland. Share your favourite childhood foods. Parents can prepare a recipe that has been a favourite of theirs when they were young. A grandparent 9who is local) can make a favourite recipe as well. Create a family cookbook together. Brig out the box of photos and spend a day looking at ancestors. Grandparents can find photos when they were young. Help your children identify older people in the photos and explain their relationship to the family. Teach the children a game that was popular “way back when.” Older children might enjoy learning their ancestral language. Start with a few common words. There are books and CDs available at most public libraries or bookstores that can teach the basics of other languages. Bring out cultural memorabilia, such as dolls, toys, clothing, plates, etc., for the children to connect to. Try making a cultural craft from your country.

MY FAMILY COLLAGE You’ll need:

Photos or photocopies Glue or glue stick Coloured construction paper -Marker Bring out the box of photos again, and let the children make a photo collage on poster board or cover a box with coloured paper and make a photo block. If you don’t have duplicate picture, think about making coloured photocopies for the kids to use. Shapes of coloured construction paper make great frames, and backing for the pictures. October 2011- I-Parent Magazine

Make sure your child recognizes each person in the photos. Use photos from the past and incorporate newer ones as well. It makes for a great genealogy lesson. A variation is to cover a coffee jar with colourful construction paper. Now, glue on your favorite family photos. Fill the jar with baked cookies or candy and present this gift to the grandparents.

A PHOTO FRAME FROM NATURE

While taking a walk together, gather these materials to make a simple but rustic picture frame. You’ll need: Twigs String, twine or yarn Glue (a hot glue gun works best) Adult supervision is needed On your walk, collect two bunches of twigs. The first bunch 9about six or eight twigs) should be about two inches longer than your photo. The other bunch should be two inches wider than your photo. Arrange the twigs so that they surround the picture and extend outward about an inch in each direction. Tie the twigs at each corner using the twine, making an “X” pattern. Glue the picture onto the back of your twig frame. Tie the small loop of string to the top bunch of twigs to hang the finished portrait.

FAMILY INTERVIEW

This activity will help your children get to know their grandparents (or an older adult at home). Today with email or the telephone or Skype, this interview activity can be done with grandparents whether local or far away. Make a list of question for children to ask Here are some suggestions:

 

When you were young, what toys or games did you play with?

When you were a child, did you have any pets? What did your pets look like? When you were young, who were the most important people in your life? Enhance the drawing by gluing on collage materials. This is a really simple project, but so much fun. Continue to make more plates to resemble either members of the family.

CREATIVE CARDS

It’s customary to send greeting cards to relatives to celebrate holidays. Making such cards offers the children an opportunity to do something thoughtful for others, plan, organize, complete a piece of work and exercise creative self-expression. Use some of these art techniques for making cards:

      

Finger-painting Collage Block printing Crayon rubs Splatter painting String painting

Crayon resist Chalk on wet paper Look up these art techniques in art books for children or on the Internet. For the greeting or message inside, children might convey their thoughts and feelings toward their grandparents. For young children, have them dictate their thoughts and an adult can do the printing.

MY GRAND MOTHER’S TRUNK

This is an old game that’s fun to play with the family, and especially when grandparents are visiting. Have the family sit together, possibly around the dinner table and start with this phrase, “My grandmother went on a trip, and in her trunk she packed a green apple.” Have the player on the right repeat this phrase and add another object. “My grandmother when on a trip, and in her trunk she packed a green apple and a _.” Use colour and an item. See how long the chain of items can be remembered and repeated Enjoy!

October 2011- I-Parent Magazine

Halloween: Fear Not! Scary Stories Are Good For Kids! By: IP Staff

There days, much of the fear of Halloween has been for parents of young children. Kids trick-or-treat in well lit malls. Costumes are inflammable, and candy wrappers are tamper-proof. Nevertheless. Some of us still grapple with another fear this time of the year: ghost stories. In an attempt to protect our children from the terrors of everyday life, we may sometimes wonder if we should also try to insulate them from things-that-go-bump-in-the-night. – As we know, stories do not have to be labeled “ghost” or “horror” to contain bone-chilling elements. The Thousand and One Nights, one of the most famous story collections of all time, frames its tales of Sinbad, Alladin and Ali Baba with the horrific situation of a woman whose husband plans to kill her as he has done to countless wives before her. Then there are those Grimms’ fairy tales, which sent Walt Disney back to the drawing board when he turned them into classic movies. How, we might well ask, can we tell tender ears that birds plucked out the eyes of Cinderella’s stepsisters, not to mention, when you think about it, that Hansel was devoured by a witch, and Grandma by a wolf? Still, many of the creepiest characters, in the largest numbers, are reserved for Halloween. In the month following 9/11, some of the towns across America even cancelled the celebration altogether. Aren’t the images on TV news horrifying enough, they asked, without further traumatizing children with fiction? In fact, childhood experts tell us, far from traumatizing a vulnerable child, scary stories, when handled appropriately, can actually instill courage and confidence. Around the globe, people have known this simple truth for thousands of years. Long ago, when children learned that Cinderella’s stepsisters were blinded by birds, they were not sitting alone reading a Goosebumps book or watching The Ring in bed. Such stories were told aloud by people they knew an enjoyed by the entire community, young and old. That is to say, the context in which the story was shared helped children encounter their fears in a safe, supportive environment and transform them, with the power of their imaginations, into action and hope. Even experienced storytellers can be thrown by a child’s reaction. Several years ago, I sat on the floor in a darkened room at a family reunion with my daughter and two young cousins and a flashlight between us. Both of the young cousins were frightened while my daughter was smiling with anticipation of hearing the ghost story and even started giggling at the silliness of it. I hadn’t gotten more than one sentence out, however, when a little boy began to cry. He jumped up from the floor and made for the door. “But I didn’t say anything yet!” I exclaimed. “I know,” he answered with a sob. “But I just knew I was going to be scared!” Fear and scary things are a normal part of everyday life for young children, teenagers and adults. The earlier in life we learn to handle them, the better, because we are able to develop coping skills. Instead of covering up fear or brushing it aside, it s healthiest to deal with it, through stories and other activities.” And that’s good news for kids. In his classis book The Uses of Enchantment, the late psychoanalyst Bruno Bettlheim explained that when children share the fears of characters in a story, they also share their triumphs and grow along with them. Viewed in this way, witches, dragons, monsters and other metaphorical, or symbolic, demons play a pivotal, role in childhood development. By putting a face to abstract fears and then face them head on, children are empowered. Children already know that fear exists, and they need to understand that its OK to be scared, that it’s how we cope with our fear that makes all the difference. In general it’s OK to tell children scary stories. What’s most important is being there for them afterward.

October 2011- I-Parent Magazine

How to Tell A Really Scary Ghost Story

There is, in fact a science to telling scary ghost stories. And that science Is based on an

easy-to-remember formula. Here it is: S-C-A-R-Y.

S is for Setting. Time and place. Get the story moving with the classic line, “Once upon a time,” then add a time reference and a location. You can be as vague or specific as you like, just make sure it’s attention grabbing. The story could take place “way back at the turn of the century” or “last Friday.” It could also take place “out West” or “in the woods behind out Wal-mart.” In general, placing the story close to home is the best way to instill some initial, palatable unease. Feel free to sprinkle in other random details as you go along, too: It was a dark rainy night; there was a dense fog in the air.

C is for Characters.

You’ll need both good and bad guys. People are the logical first choice, but don’t forget about animals. Kids love to anthropomorphize animals, so giving some human qualities to, say, a spider or snake, is a perfectly good way to go. Be sure to give each character a name. Use whichever names pop into your head. Give the characters physical descriptions – and be very generous on this part. Kids love detailed descriptions and the weirder, the better: long, greasy hair; chunk of right ear missing; hunched back; or one leg shorter than the other.

is for Yikes! But not so fast! R is for Relief. Once you’ve Y It wouldn’t be a really great stirred the kids up with a gripping plot. It’s time to take them back to comfort and safety. Let them take a big breath by bringing the story to a resolution. In other wards, tell exactly how the main character escaped from certain doom: chewed through the ropes; jumped off a roof into a hay bale; crawled through the rodentinfested sewer pipe to safety. The idea is to make your listeners feel that all potential for danger is over.

story without one last thrill. Add a line like this: “Oh, and one other thing I forgot to mention.” When they anxiously reply, you launch into an explanation of how: the villain recently escaped from the biggest provincial mental institution; the villain’s ghost still lives around here somewhere; or how you hear a rustling out in the backyard. Planting a seed of uncertainty – and leaving the story open-ended – will leave the kids talking and thinking about it all night. So that’s it. Just remember: S-C-A-R-Y/ Next time your kids beg, “Puhhleeeeeaaase, tell us a ghost story,” sit down and create a tale they’ll never forget!

A is for Action. Now

you’re ready to tell what happened. This is the crucial part of the story and the most difficult to keep up. Keep thinking in your mind, “What should really happen next?” If you have a greasy-haired, one -eared bandit driving down the highway, it’s logical that the bandit would get pulled over by a policeman. It’s then logical that the bandit would jump out of his car and into the woods. It’s then logical that police helicopters would search the area. One thing leads to the next. You don’t need to have the entire story developed ahead of time. Just build the plot methodically, one detail at a time (the buildup is the excruciatingly wonderful part) and your audience’s reaction (gasping, pulling covers over the head, yawning) will tell you how you’re doing. Complete this part of the story with a blockbuster event (most likely the villain Is oh so close to doing something terrible, but is thwarted in the nick of time).

October 2011- I-Parent Magazine

What Kind of Smart is Your Child? By: Monique Santangelo

Looking back, Jane Good saw signs that her daughter was going to be good with words shortly before Anne turned 9-months old. Anne had spent the previous months looking around in silence, not even uttering a random ‘da-da’ here or there. Not until the day when Anne looked up at her mom, raised her arms and said, “Pick me up.” “She resisted walking,” laughs Good. “It’s not that she isn’t athletic, necessarily. She was a second child.” Fifteen years later, Anne is a voracious reader and still eschews exercise with the exception of horseback riding. “When we noticed that Marie was always painting or drawing we made an art center in our kitchen,” says Virginia Batta. “She is good, too. We still have some of her early work framed and hanging around the house.” The Battas supported Marie’s art by painting one wall with chalkboard material so making writing on walls not only okay, but encouraged. “She’s an imaginative child as well, but she loves drawing.” Any parent knows their child is more than just the number on an IQ test or the letter on a report card. The theory of multiple intelligence, the idea that intelligence comes in more than one form saying that every person has many types of intelligence and the degree varies per person. While each person has strengths in one or more areas, each person is a balance of all the forms of intelligences. Here are the types of intelligence divided into seven categories:

 

Linguistic Intelligence (word smart)

  

Spatial Intelligence (picture smart)

 

Intrapersonal Intelligence (self smart)

Logical-Mathematical Intelligence (number/reasoning smart) Musical Intelligence (music smart)

Bodily-Kinesthetic Intelligence (body smart)

Interpersonal Intelligence (people smart) Naturalist Intelligence (nature smart) You can observe the multiple intelligences daily in any one person How do you know where your child’s strengths lie? Watch them. What do they do with their free time? The child with spatial intelligence will search for a crayon. The child with kinesthetic intelligence will probably run outside straight to the jungle gym, while the linguistic child may head off to a quiet corner with a book. For more clues, notice how the child misbehaves. The child with high musical intelligence may constantly tap his foot when he should be sitting quietly. A child with naturalist intelligence may sneak the outside dog into her room late at night when she thinks no one will notice. The interpersonal intelligence child may whisper in class. And the one with a high logical intelligence may explode science experiments all over your clean kitchen. The signs show up at early ages and to ensure a well rounded child, Gardner suggests encouraging the areas where a child may have a weakness. The earlier the strengths are identified, the more a parent can help the child develop in all areas. Plus, the more aware a parent is of their child’s strength and weaknesses, the more the parent can help with the child’s self-esteem. Because most conventional schools teach to the linguistic or logical intelligences, some kids feel stupid when they have a hard time grasping a math concept. But that same child could be a budding entrepreneur with the most successful lawn mowing business in town. October 2011- I-Parent Magazine

Linguistic/Word Smart

Most Likely to Win a Debate A born storyteller with an innate love of language and words. Not only the sound of the words, but how to put them together and their uses. Characteristics: Demonstrates highly developed auditory skills. Likes to read. Processes information through listening. Has a good memory for names, places, dates and trivia. Likes using a word processor. Tells jokes, stories or tall tales. Enjoys speaking in front of groups. Spells words accurately and easily. Has a well-developed vocabulary. Activities for the Linguistic Thinker: Read together. Write stories, letters or journals. Play word games like Scrabble or do crossword puzzles. Tell stories and attend story time at your local library.

Spatial/Picture Smart

Most Likely to have a Painting in the High Museum of Art Has a photographic memory and can draw from it. This child thinks in images, accurately understanding his place and where other things are in relation to him. Characteristics: Thinks in images and pictures. Likes to draw and paint. Easily reads maps, charts and diagrams. Draws accurate representation of people or things. Enjoys movies, slide or photographs. Can easily do jigsaw puzzles or mazes. Daydreams. Activities for the Spatial Thinker: Provide art classes or art material in the home. Play imagination games. Read maps together. Draw and do jigsaw puzzles and mazes. Visit art museums and galleries.

Musical/Music Smart

Most Likely to be in the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame Can probably tell without prompting when a note is on key. This child thinks in rhythms and melodies. Talents can often be intuitive in the child who can pick out a tune by ear. Characteristics: Plays an instrument or enjoys music. Sings and remembers melodies of songs. Can easily tell when a musical note is off-key. Listens to music when relaxing, studying or working. Collects records, tapes or CDs. Keeps time rhythmically to music. Hums or whistles. Activities for the Musical Thinker: Sing with your child. Provide music lessons, listen to music together, go to a concert. Play classical music while he/she is studying. Buy musical tapes that teach educational concepts like adding, multiplication and parts of speech.

Kinesthetic/Body Smart

Most Likely to Join the Circus This child has grace and probably rarely trips or missteps and thinks best through physical motion. Characteristics: Learns best by moving around, touching or acting things out. Processes knowledge through bodily sensations. Moves, twitches, taps or fidgets while sitting. Engages in physical activities or competitive sports. Performs fine and gross motor tasks skillfully. Likes to touch people when talking to them. Demonstrates skills in handicrafts. Prefers action-packed stories. Activities for the Kinesthetic Thinker: Provide hands on learning materials. Encourage drama, dance, sports and handicrafts such as sewing, building models and dancing.

October 2011- I-Parent Magazine

Intrapersonal/Self Smart

Most Likely to be the Next Dr. Phil Rich awareness of own emotions, moods, temperaments, motivations and can use the information to enrich his own experience. This child relates his own rich inner life to his goals. Characteristics: Has a deep awareness of inner feelings, strengths and weaknesses. Displays a strong sense of independence. Reacts with strong opinions about controversial issues. Prefers own private, inner world. Likes to be alone to pursue hobbies or projects. Is self-confident. Individualistic in styles, dress and general behavior. Activities for the Intrapersonal Thinker: Encourage your child to write in a journal. Allow time for independent study and the pursuit of personal hobbies or interest. Talk with your children about her thoughts and feelings.

Interpersonal/People Smart

Most Likely to be Class President Keen awareness of other individuals with the ability to read emotions, moods, temperaments, motivations and can use the information in pragmatic ways including persuasion, manipulation or mediation. This child is a social being and is probably the center of his group. Characteristics: Enjoys interacting with people. Has many friends. Socializes at school, work or home. Organizes, communicates and sometimes manipulates. Learns best by relating and cooperating. Activities for the Interpersonal Thinker: Provide cooperative learning experiences with the family. Encourage your child to join clubs, participate in group and community activities, peer mediate at school or run for class officer.

Naturalist/Nature Smart

Most Likely to Save the Dolphins Dogâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s best friend. This child has a way with animals and loves nature, plants and maybe entire ecosystems. Characteristics: Plays with pets. Connects with animals and living organisms. Enjoys nature and the outdoors. Investigates the natural world. Activities for the Naturalist Thinker: Give access to nature and opportunities to explore their world. Provide time to play with and observe animals. Give them the tools to investigate, such as magnifying glasses or a telescope.

October 2011- I-Parent Magazine