How to Support Your Teenagers on Course Selection?

BY Maggie Liu

Skyline High School Parent

In the spring, I attended a parent seminar led by Issaquah School District Family Partnership Liaison Wenli Mithal, where we discussed the issue of course selection for middle and high school students. Choosing courses is something we used to encounter only in college in China, but here, in the United States, children begin to have a variety of choices as early as middle school. What is the best way to choose? Should they opt for standard courses or advanced courses? I believe each parent has their own perspectives, and children have their own preferences. Today, I want to share my child's experience.

We moved from China to the United States in 2018, and my child entered the sixth grade at Pine Lake Middle School. We felt the progress in the Standard Level math class was too slow, so in seventh grade, he took CC7/8, and in eighth grade, he took Algebra 1. However, during eighth grade, online learning due to the pandemic was challenging for him, and he felt he didn’t solidly learn many key points. So, when it came to choosing courses for the ninth grade in high school, he decided to retake Algebra 1. From my perspective, since he had already taken the advanced course, he should continue moving forward, and any weak points could be reviewed over the summer rather than spending an entire year retaking the class. This decision disrupted his high school course plan and could even affect his college applications. After discussing it with him, we decided to respect his choice.

When it was time to choose courses for the tenth grade, he told me on his own that he wanted to take IB (International Baccalaureate) courses in the eleventh grade and the IBDP (The International Baccalaureate Diploma Programme) in the twelfth grade. He had consulted with an IB advisor and planned his IB course selection for the eleventh grade according to his abilities and interests (he even arranged for himself to take two math courses in order to prepare for the IBDP). Initially, I thought that retaking Algebra 1 for a year would delay his academic progress, but surprisingly, the decision to retake it led him to take a more proactive approach to his studies. He became more aware of what he wanted and what he was capable of.

What brought about my mindset change? I believe allowing children to make their own decisions and move forward at their own pace is crucial.

Firstly, regarding course selection, as parents, we can provide our children with suggestions, but the final decision should be left to them. Letting them make their own decisions makes them feel respected, and they will care more about the choices they make. What should they choose, how should they choose, and what will the outcome be? They will be willing to strategize for themselves. Additionally, since they made the choice themselves, they will be psychologically prepared to accept the outcomes of their choices and take responsibility for them. I think this is why my child later wanted to pursue the IBDP and took the initiative to consult with teachers about course selection.

Secondly, every child has their own growth pace, and we must allow them time to think about the problems they encounter and find solutions. Take my child as an example: retaking Algebra 1 in ninth grade and choosing two math courses in tenth grade was a process of self-adjustment for him. During this period, he slowed down his study pace and filled in his knowledge gaps. As he gradually adapted to the high school study rhythm and improved his learning abilities, he made corresponding adjustments. Of course, this choice may not be suitable for every child, but for him, when he made the choice, he was confident and full of hope for the upcoming studies. Furthermore, children develop differently, both physically and mentally. Some understand their learning goals clearly in middle school, while others don’t find their interests until high school or even college. As parents, we need to be patient and consistently provide encouragement and support.

As a parent, I fully understand the worry and anxiety we all feel when our children are choosing courses. But life is a process of constantly making choices, trying, and adjusting to find oneself. Choosing advanced courses does not mean a smooth life thereafter, nor does choosing standard courses mean losing competitiveness. Finding the right courses and making choices, then experiencing the process, is an important part of self-growth. Communicate more with your children and trust them more. I believe they will gain valuable life-long lessons from the course selection process.

These are just some of our own feelings and experiences. I hope sharing them will help other parents and children who are facing similar dilemmas or are troubled by course selection. I hope all children can find the direction and goals they are passionate about through the course selection process.