CharlottesvilleFamily August 2016 by Ivy Life & Style Media

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SCHOOL 125+ AFTERACTIVITIES

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BACK TO SCHOOL

AUGUST 2016 • FREE

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Enter to WIN PRIZES when you vote Including $100 Cash! Voting runs September 1 to October 10 at CharlottesvilleFamily.com

503 Faulconer Drive Charlottesville, VA 22903 t: 434.295.1131 f: 434.293.7377

MCLEAN FAULCONER INC. Farm, Estate and Residential Brokers

WALNUT HILL FARM Extraordinary, 64+ acre farm with 3 homes, 2 ponds, pastures, hardwoods, and much more. ELK MOUNTAIN LODGE Main residence is a solar envelope home with Top of Blue Ridge Mountains. 1,000+ acres with circa 1928, optimum efficiency. $1,100,000 MLS#547207 9,000 square foot stone, lodge-type home (up to 11 bedrooms Will Faulconer 434.987.9455 and 6.5 baths) with 3-bedroom stone guest home. Fronting Blue Ridge Parkway and George Washinton National Forest, panoramic views of Rockfish Valley, Shenandoah Valley, and long frontage on the Appalachian Trail. Just 3 miles off Rt. 250 & I-64. See: www.elkmountainlodgeva.com $4,750,000 MLS#546756 JimFaulconer 434.981.0076

WEST LEIGH Circa 1999, 2-story colonial residence with many attractive features and in like new condition. Located on a wonderful 3.05 acre lot only 4 miles west of town. $595,000 MLS#550121 Jim Faulconer 434.981.0076

NEAR MONTICELLO Possible dream house on 5.5+ acres just outside the City! Charming, 4-BR, cedar & stone home with large master wing. Lovely grounds, pool, tennis court, workshop, gazebo. $745,000 MLS#546568 Steve McLean 434.981.1863

PARK HILL Circa 1911, elegant, recently renovated, 5 BR home designed by noted architect Eugene Bradbury. Private, 2-acre site offers gardens & swimming pool. Walk to Downtown. $945,000 MLS#536517 Tim Michel 434.960.1124

WOOD DUCK POND Impeccable home with a guest cottage features 4 bedrooms, 3.5 baths, chef ’s kitchen, family room with a stone fireplace, and a huge rec room. Also with 2 ponds and a large shed. $810,000 MLS#543365 Steve McLean 434.981.1863

FLORDON Spacious, light filled home with 5 bedrooms, including 2 master bedrooms, 4.5 baths, new kitchen and many upgrades, located on cul de sac section of Tanglewood. $985,000. MLS #584444. Nancy Roche 981.7873

TWIN CREEKS 176-acre sanctuary boasts panoramic views of the Blue Ridge Mountains with two, dramatic contemporary homes with open floor plans built by Shelter, master craftsman. Main residence has 2 bedrooms and 2.5 baths, guest home has 2 bedrooms and 2 baths. Includes 15–20 open acres, Mechums River frontage, fantastic views, privacy, hiking trails, other magnificent building sites, and is only 8 miles to Charlottesville. $2,895,000 MLS#546945 Jim Faulconer 434.981.0076

RUGBY ROAD Designed by Eugene Bradbury, this meticulously updated, 6-bedroom, 5.5-bath, circa 1913 residence occupies two lots of just under 2.5 acres and is within walking distance to UVA and Barracks Road. Stunning kitchen with commerical appliances, library, wine cellar and so much more! Exquisitely restored gardens, extensive walks, brick garden walls, and two small ponds—a true oasis in the City. $2,750,000 MLS#530390 Steve McLean 434.981.1863

RIVERRUN Low-maintenance living steps from City conveniences! 2-BR townhouse with eat-in kitchen, spacious living room and fenced rear patio. Walk to community pool and Pen Park. $161,950 MLS#543258 Steve McLean 434.981.1863

RUGBY ROAD New 5 BR, 5 BA residence with 5,000+ sq. ft. Beautiful Tuscan design, superb kitchen and master suite, energy efficient. Best quality materials & construction. Walk to UVA! $1,799,999 MLS#542546 Jim Faulconer 434.981.0076

WWW.MCLEANFAULCONER.COM

volume 17 issue 8

Just Between Us… Dear Friends, This summer, we’ve had a great time hanging out together with minimal schedules, but there just wasn’t enough of those delightful laid back kind of days. This was the summer the kids really started out en masse into the world on their own with their own camps and adventures—it was so much more than fun. They really stretched themselves. Our oldest took a college biology seminar and did some traveling that has left her feeling ready to leap into the next adventure after, gulp, this last year in high school. Her sister pursued her passion for dance intensively and lived away for weeks on her own for the very first time. The boys grew in leaps and bounds—not just taller, but also wiser. One now swims like a fish, rolls a kayak like an expert and can do some basic computer programming, while the other has proudly mastered his two-wheeler and some great one-liners. This week’s favorite is “Hey, Mom. I saw a man making a basket today. It was unbe-weave-able!” Ba-dum-ching! Not only did they all take risks and stretch, I did, too. You know how hard it is to cheerfully say goodbye and drop them off in a new setting. Knowing in my

PUBLISHERS

august 2016 Robin Johnson Bethke Jennifer Bryerton

CREATIVE DIRECTOR Robin Johnson Bethke EDITOR-IN-CHIEF Jennifer Bryerton TECHNICAL DIRECTOR Peter D. Bethke SENIOR EDITOR Sarah Pastorek ONLINE EDITORS Mandy Reynolds, Madison Stanley INTERNS Carrie Domenic, Gracyn Hill, Elizabeth Morgan, Emily Morris GRAPHIC DESIGN Cristan Keighley Barbara A. Tompkins SENIOR ADVERTISING CONSULTANT Susan Powell ADVERTISING SALES Carter Schotta, Jenny Stoltz, Gayle Tate CONTRIBUTING WRITERS Kelly Casey, Beth Cheuk, Rick Epstein, Tracey Crehan Gerlach, Alan Goldberg, Heidi Smith Luedtke, Laura Merricks, Whitney Woollerton Morrill, Luke Pieczynski, Danielle Sullivan, Bob Taibbi, Lynn Thorne ADMINISTRATIVE MANAGER Denise Simmerman SALES ASSISTANT Caitlin Morris DISTRIBUTION Ray Whitson

head that I was giving them a tremendous gift by showing them how proud and confident I am of their abilities to manage on their own didn’t stop my stomach from secretly turning anxious flips faster than a wind-up toy! The great news is that my instinct about my children was correct. Other wonderful adults took over, the lessons they’ve been learning all along kicked into play, and they all behaved responsibly and conquered challenges. And, now, we’re almost all ready for back-to-school season—better prepared to master new skills, make new friends and keep on growing in new directions. I’m just going to use these last few weeks wisely. I’m thinking kickball, cooling off with a water fight, ping-pong tournaments, a big jigsaw puzzle, library books and, of course, s’mores around the fire pit. Happy Back-to-School!

CharlottesvilleFamily™ Bloom Magazine and CharlottesvilleFamily. com™ are published jointly by Ivy Publications, LLC. CharlottesvilleFamily.com™ is published weekly online at www. CharlottesvilleFamily.com, the weekly Newsletter is distributed via email, and the Magazine is published in print format 12 times per year along with a CharlottesvilleFamily.com™ Directory. The views and opinions expressed by the writers and advertisers do not necessarily represent those of CharlottesvilleFamily magazine, its officers, staff or contributors. The information presented here is for informational purposes only and although every effort has been made to present accurate information, we do not in any way accept responsibility for the accuracy of or consequences from the use of this information or for the businesses and organizations presented herein. We urge all parents to confirm any information given herein and consult with your doctor or an appropriate professional concerning any information of question. All images not credited are property of and provided by Thinkstock by Gettyimages. No portion of this publication may be reproduced in part or in whole without the express written consent of the publisher. Copyright ©2016. All rights reserved.

We welcome reader comments, submissions and the support of advertisers! Please direct all correspondence to Ivy Publications, LLC 4282 Ivy Road, Charlottesville, Virginia 22903 voice 434.984.4713 fax 434.984.4813 www.CharlottesvilleFamily.com editor@IvyPublications.com We reserve the right to refuse or edit any materials submitted to us that we deem inappropriate for our audience. Include a SASE with any submission to be returned. We do not accept responsibility for unsolicited materials.

2004 Community Award Winner

August 2016

Contents TABLE OF

OUR TOWN

LIVING WELL

New Mom 26 Newborn “Extras”

News 6

The Buzz Around Town 8 When setting up a playdate, do you ask the other child’s parents if they have a gun in their home?

Our Schools 10

Welcoming Artwork at Local Schools

Out & About Calendar 12

August Festivals & Events for Families

40 new!

INSPIRATION

Dear Bob 28 Your Parenting Questions Answered

You Can Do It! 44 Encourage a Can-Do Attitude About

Mindful Parenting 30 Healthy Habits

Academics

Healthy Family 32 Brain Boosters

How 5 Minutes Can Make a World of Difference

Daytrip Fun 20 The Highlands Golf Park & Splash Down Waterpark

Take 5 48

For the Win! 58

Editor’s Pick! Check out the great brain-boosting breakfast ideas on page 32 to get your school days off to a strong start. Easy & delicious!

13 Steps to Being a Winning Parent

RESOURCES

2016 Back-to-School Guide 40

Tips & Lists for a Great First Day

After School Activity Guide 60

Sports, Arts & More

UNTIL NEXT TIME

Another Summer’s End 70 A Dad’s Humorous Tales

Tips & Trends 34 Fabulous Finds and Fun Home & Garden 36 Endless Beauty

34 So Love This! “I love sending notes to my kids in their school lunchbox or surprising them with a note on their pillow or desk. It’s a sweet way to stay connected, and I especially love it now that they send me little notes and drawings too.” — Jen, Editor-in-Chief

58 CharlottesvilleFamily.com

{our town community}

News

local buzz

Ivy Publications proudly sponsors:

Museum Day Live! In honor of Smithsonian’s Museum Day Live, over 20 of Virginia’s museums will offer free admission on September 24. The annual event, sponsored by Smithsonian Magazine, includes over 1,500 museums across the nation that open their doors for free. One ticket includes free admission for two guests. Tickets will be available for download beginning on August 1, 2016. Some museums participating in the area include the Virginia Discovery Museum, the James Monroe Museum and Memorial Library, the Newtown History Center and the Woodrow Wilson Presidential Library and Museum.

Splash for a Cure

Photo by Beth Seliga

August 27 ACAC Adventure Central 5K race and pool party to benefit childhood cancer research.

20 New Bikes for Boys and Girls Club The Boy and Girls Club of Southwood was able to enjoy new sets of wheels this summer, thanks to a generous donation from the Faith Christian Center International (FCCI). The local church donated 20 bicycles to the club; and following one of its core beliefs of reaching out to others in the community, it is looking forward to making donations in the future. The donation ignited feelings of love and encouragement for the children at the Boys and Girls Club when they heard about the generous gift. The children will now be able to purchase the bikes with points they receive at the club for performing well academically and for good behavior.

Students Attend Safe Driving Retreat Over 120 teens from more than two dozen high schools across the state spent one week attending a series of presentations and activities on safe driving practices. Funded by a grant from the Virginia Department of Motor Vehicles Highway Safety Office, the “Operation YOVASO: Drive to Save Lives” 2016 Summer Leadership Retreat at James Madison University, a youth program offered to help build knowledge about traffic safety, was created to help students study the negative consequences of poor driving habits while training to become youth traffic safety advocates. The goal of YOVASO, or Youth of Virginia Speak Out About Traffic Safety, is to have students take what they learned back to their own schools and work in peer-to-peer programs to help prevent motor vehicle crashes among teens.

Center for Politics Holds Kids Event The University of Virginia Center for Politics held its 18th Annual Virginia Political History Project earlier this summer. Striving to infuse civic engagement into kids’ activities, this year’s event—“Kid Power”—was designed to engage area children in American civics, politics, history, culture and diversity. Day campers from the Piedmont Family YMCA, the Boys and Girls Club of Charlottesville and ACAC, ranging in age from kindergarten to sixth grade, participated in different activities, including a mock election, an obstacle course with lessons on the Declaration of Independence, the Constitution and the Bill of Rights, and a tug of war to learn about state representation. The Virginia Political History Project strives to engage kids at an early age to show them how one child can make a difference in today’s society.

August 2016

Earlier this summer, the Rivanna River Rowing Club, one of Charlottesville’s largest athletic clubs, hosted a “Learn to Row Day” for the public. Individuals who have never rowed before received pointers from experienced rowers like Allison Pugh, who has been practicing the sport since her freshman year in college. The event encouraged those with an interest to pursue rowing, no matter their age, while also providing what participants felt was a full-body workout. The event was held on the Rivanna Reservoir, a popular place for rowing teams in central Virginia.

Photo by Stacey Evans

Rowing Club Teaches First-Time Rowers

Albemarle Fifth Graders Visit Monticello The Thomas Jefferson Foundation provided free passes to Monticello for recent fifth grade graduates and their families. Tours and activities lasted most of the day, with hands on activities including writing with a quill and using an antique telescope. Approximately 60 families participated, many of who had never been to Monticello before. The students’ passes will last the rest of the year, allowing them to return when they wish. Keeping with their mission to educate individuals about Virginia history, the Thomas Jefferson Foundation provided the passes to educate students and their families about the rich history in their own backyards.

2 locations! hollymead town center & spring creek

Jennifer M. Dixon, DDS, MS

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Diplomate of the American Board of Pediatric Dentistry

Pediatric Dentistry Specialists Nitrous Oxide, Mild and IV Sedation Services Compassionate and Nurturing Doctors and Staff Kid-friendly, State-of-the-Art Office Parental Participation Encouraged

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Dr. Dixon now seeing patients at Spring Creek!

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{our town voices} Buzz

The

When setting up a play date with your child’s new friend, do you ask the other child’s parents if they have a gun in their home?

AROUND

TOWN

40% say “yes”

60% say “no”

“My husband is a police officer, and so we do have a weapon in the house. I always share that information with other moms, as well as the lengths we go to for keeping it locked and secured away from the kids. I think it is certainly a reasonable question to ask.” Mom of two preteens

“It’s not something I think of when setting up a playdate.” Heather, mom of two boys “I trust other parents to exercise caution and safety around children.” Amanda

“It is super awkward, but we feel strongly about this. Usually, we just try to invite kids to our home to avoid the topic.”

“We don’t allow our children to be at anyone’s house we don’t know well, so we feel that is assuring enough.”

Mom of two, Charlottesville

Carrie, mom of three

Visit CharlottesvilleFamily.com to answer next month’s question:

Should you let your toddlers watch TV?

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SPORTS ZONE

The Women’s Legal Group Law from a Woman’s Point of View

Brunelle Helps U.S. Team Bring Home the Bronze

FAMILY MATTERS • Separation Agreement • No-Fault & Contested Divorce • Child Support & Custody • Collaborative Divorce • Consumer Protection • Wills & Adoptions • Bankruptcy

ARREST & TRAFFIC • Felony Charges • UVA Sexual Misconduct • Expungement • DUI & Reckless Driving

INJURY & DISABILITY • Personal Injury • Workers’ Compensation • Social Security Disability • Automobile Accident • Medical Malpractice • Brain Injury

Please contact us. We want to help. CharlottesvilleFamily

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Favorite Award Winner 2015

Charlottesville 434.973.7474 | Lake Monticello 434.589.3636 www.TGBlaw.com | Inquire@TGBlaw.com Samantha Brunelle, a student at William Monroe High School, helped the U-17 U.S. National Basketball Team bring home a bronze medal from the world championship in Spain. The team defeated China to win third place, with Brunelle being one for one from behind the arc and grabbing two rebounds in only four minutes of play. At just 15 years old and entering her sophomore year of high school, Brunelle was the youngest player on the team. Her 6-foot-2 stature gives her a distinct edge over many competitors, and it only adds to the young all-star’s tremendous value to not only the national team but also her local teams. Jess Stafford, the coach of William Monroe’s team, praised Brunelle for her presence and personality both on the court as well as in the community. Brunelle is already receiving several Division I offers to play at the collegiate level, but she is looking forward to her remaining career at William Monroe.

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{our town community}

Ourls

Schoo

by Beth Cheu

Welcoming Artwork at Local Schools Going back to school means seeing old friends and making new ones—even if the friend is a 33-foot-long

make a mural along a frequently used outdoor stairwell. Pagni remembers eyeing the location for the second

mural. At Walker Upper Elementary School, students are

mural. “My students and I used that stairwell every day,

greeted by three friendly, cheerful wall paintings.

just a blank concrete wall, and I kept thinking, ‘We need

“Having artwork be part of our schools is important,” says Charlottesville City Schools fine arts coordinator

to do something here,’” she says. Using figures developed by various students, Pagni

Aaron Eichorst. “At Walker, the murals set a welcoming

drafted a plan and then asked students for revisions.

and friendly tone. They also serve as landmarks to

Working together, they created a montage of full and

help students learn their way around, and they become

partial figures as well as hands that spell out “art” in

touchstones—a little sign of belonging that says, ‘This is

American Sign Language.

my place.’”

Once the design for the wall was complete, so was

Walker’s first murals were created in 2002 and 2008

the 2014-15 school year. Thankfully, Charlottesville City

through the leadership of local artists whose students

School students participating in a Region 10 summer

attended the school. Last year, art teacher Samantha

camp were able to turn the drawings into reality.

Pagni worked with students to create a second mural. The mural grew out of an art/PE project in which fifth-

When school began last August, the returning art students were able to see the realization of their

grade art students explored the idea of movement. The

sketches and planning. Pagni says the project was a big

students created projects inspired by the artist Keith

hit among students and staff, and she’s eager for this

Haring. His energetic stick figures captured not only a

year’s fifth-graders to see the mural for the first time.

sense of movement but also the students’ imaginations.

“The mural is a good way to welcome students. A new

The initial partnership with PE classes produced

school can be a scary place, but a bright and cheerful

colorful posters that paired the active stick figures with

mural designed and made by kids their own age is a

information about heart health. Because the posters

great way to say welcome.”

were so popular, Pagni and her students decided to

Beth serves as a community liaison for Charlottesville City Schools.

August 2016

BIZ BITS OPENINGS Ma Spa, a retreat center for mothers, offering classes on self-care and home life, is now open on Woodbrook Drive. Sleep and Wellness Coach, LLC is now open for consultations on your child’s sleep patterns.

ANNOUNCEMENTS



Multi-sensory approach incorporates traditional instruction and advanced technology.



Daily one-to-one instruction and small classes (5:1 student to teacher ratio).



Day and boarding programs for ages 6 to 13.



Horseback riding, sports, arts, music and more.



2016-17 openings available!

A new and improved full-service café is coming soon to Bounce Play-nCreate. Devils Backbone Brewpub & Meadows opened The Summit, located at the Arrington Station train depot in Nelson County, which will serve light, made-to-order breakfast fare and specialty coffee drinks. With the proposal for a new CVS Pharmacy at the Meadowbrook Shopping Center, locally-owned Meadowbrook Pharmacy will most likely be relocating their store, but the exact location has not yet been decided.

www.oaklandschool.net

434-293-9059

information@oaklandschool.net

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Congratulations to Dr. Wolanski on a successful career of caring for families and delivering his 10,000th baby.

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Phase 1 was approved for William Taylor Plaza Hotel, which will be located on the corner of Cherry Avenue and Ridge Street.

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Smoked BBQ Co. is expanding from a food truck to a restaurant and sky bar in Crozet.

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Mission BBQ, Uncle Maddio’s Pizza and Qdoba Mexican Eats are nearing completion to open in Stonefield.

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{our town calendar}

Out

About

AUGUST 2016

FESTIVALS & FAIRS

will be donated to St. Jude’s Children’s Hospital. 566-1762, tristenfest.com

Wintergreen Summer Music Festival

Blue Ridge Mountain Music Fest

Now–August 7, 9:30am–11pm at Wintergreen Resort Park Experience some of the world’s greatest music. Choose from events highlighting music, theatre, film, literature, history and food. 325-8292, wintergreenperformingarts.org

Shenandoah Valley Music Festival

Now–September 14 at Shrine Mont Camp & Conference Center One of the mid-Atlantic region’s longestrunning outdoor music events, with worldclass music by a stellar array of performers. 540-459-3396, musicfest.org

Augusta County Fair

August 2–6 at Augusta Expoland Tractor pulls, petting zoos, hot dog pig racing, laser tag and more. 540-245-5627, augustacountyfair.com

Albemarle County Fair

August 4–6, 4–10pm Thursday, 10am–10pm Friday & Saturday at James Monroe Highland Enjoy farm animals, craft exhibits, live music, games and activities, children’s rides, contests and programs for the entire family. 293-2725, albemarlecountyfair.com

Hill Top Berry Farm Blackberry Festival August 6, 9am–5pm at Hill Top Berry Farm & Winery Pick-your-own blackberries with the kids. Enjoy vendors, food and live music. 361-1266, hilltopberrywine.com

August 13, 12–7pm at Dunlop Pavilion, Wintergreen Resort Enjoy the uniquely American sounds of bluegrass and Americana music in the beautiful Blue Ridge Mountains. 325-8292, wintergreenperformingarts.org

C-Well Festival

August 6, 10am–2pm at Lee Park First annual outdoor celebration of health, wellness and wholeness. Wellness practioners will offer services, classes and games for the kids. 973-2030, barredstudio.com

32nd Annual Homemade Peach Ice Cream Days

August 6–7 at Chiles Peach Orchard Join the Crozet Lions Club for homemade peach ice cream. Proceeds will go towards Crozet and the Western Albemarle community. 823-1583, chilesfamilyorchards.com

Greene County Fair

August 9–15 at Greene County Fairgrounds Entertainment, food, concerts, animal shows, contests and more. 985-7622, greenecountyfairvirginia.com

Just Peachy Pancake Breakfast

August 13–14, 9–11am Saturday, 10am–12pm Sunday at Chiles Peach Orchard All-you-can-eat pancakes with fresh fruit toppings, a side of sausage and a beverage. 823-1583, chilesfamilyorchards.com

Green Valley Book Fair

August 13–September 5 at Mt. Crawford Encourage reading by expanding his or her library. Huge selections of books at huge discounts. 800-385-0099, gobookfair.com

Carytown Watermelon Festival

August 14, 10am–6pm at West Cary Street, Richmond 3,000 watermelons, 60 musicians, over 100 exhibitors and one of the largest kids’ areas of any festival on the east coast. 804-304-6870, carytownrva.org

Beach Party Bash

Tristen Fest

August 11–13 at Heavenly Acres Campground, Stanardsville Enjoy live music, food, drinks and kids’ activities at this festival in memory of Greene County resident Tristen Roach. All proceeds

August 15–19, 10am–2pm at the B&O Railroad Museum Discover your end of summer adventure with fun hands-on activities that keep kids entertained and engaged. Activities include story time, sand fun, boat building, potato sack races, a bounce house, games and more. 410-752-2490, borail.org

Rockingham County Fair

August 15–20 at Rockingham County Fairgrounds The state’s largest agricultural fair with rides, competitions, motor sports, animals and more. 540-434-0005, rockinghamcountyfair.com

Fluvanna County Fair

August 17–20 at Pleasant Grove Park Rides, midway games, live music and food vendors. fluvannacounty.org

Riverfront Chalk Festival & Art Contest

Annual Light House Youth Film Festival 12

August 2016

August 26th. See page 13.

August 20, 10am–2pm at Amazement Square Come enjoy live music, food trucks and activities. Transform the downtown parking lot into an open-air gallery lined with colorful works of art with prizes for adults and youths. 845-1888, amazementsquare.org

Mountain Jamboree

August 20, 5–10pm at Massanutten Resort Food vendors, kid’s corner, fireworks show and more. 540-289-9441, massresort.com

MINI ESTATE OVERLOOKING IVY CREEK

LIGHT-DRENCHED IN ASHCROFT

1730 LAMBS ROAD • $879,000 Incredible value for the right buyers and minutes to city conveniences. The residence offers abundant formal and casual living spaces inside and out. 4 bedrooms, 4 full, 2 half baths, pool, pool house with half bath. Gardens, level lawns, even an indoor racquetball court. Lisa Lyons (434) 987-1767. MLS# 541992

60 BIRCH LANE • $595,000 This delightful 4-bedroom home on a private, landscaped 1-acre lot offers a light, bright great room/kitchen plus separate study, dining and living rooms. A lower level nanny suite opens onto a shaded patio surrounded by lovely plantings. Improvements include a 50-year roof and hardiplank siding. Joan Jay (434) 906-1806. MLS #545961

Annual Light House Youth Film Festival

August 26, 6pm at The Paramount Theater Enjoy some popcorn and mingle with participants before the screening of the year’s best works. 293-6992, lighthousestudio.org

Shenandoah County Fair

August 26–September 3 at 300 Fairground Road, Woodstock Come out and enjoy tractor pulls, demo derbies, concerts and more. 540-459-3867, shencofair.com

Splash For A Cure

August 27, 8–10:30am at ACAC Adventure Central The event will include a 5K race, slip-sliding water-park fun, entertainment and great food to raise money and awareness for neuroblastoma. CharlottesvilleFamily is a proud sponsor. 227-5317, splashforacure.com

EXPANSIVE & LUXE CUSTOM CAPE IN THE MERIWETHER-LEWIS DISTRICT

MARKETS & BAZAARS Farmers in the Park

Now–September, Wednesdays, 3–7pm at Meade Park 970-3371, charlottesville.org

Forest Lakes Farmers Market

Now–October, Tuesdays, 4–7pm at the Forest Lakes South Pool and Tennis Parking lot at 1650 Ashwood Blvd facebook.com/ForestLakesFarmersMarket/

3080 BEAU MONT FARM ROAD • $884,500

Behind the classic Cape Cod curb appeal of this 2009 constructed house lies an open floor in step with modern tastes for plenty of casual living space. Sited privately on over 2 acres in the coveted Meriwether-Lewis District, this home offers a deep, covered front porch, wonderful rear screened porch, deck off the family room & kitchen, plus raised, fenced garden beds, chicken coop and most importantly, plenty of level lawn. Immaculate condition and up-to-the-minute finish selections. Room for a 5th bedroom suite on lower level. 10 minutes to town. Erin Garcia (434) 981-7245. MLS# 549173

EVERGREEN HOMEBUILDERS

CRAFTSMAN-STYLE WATERFRONT HOME

956 PARK RIDGE DRIVE • $675,000 Just completed, this beautiful 4 bedroom, 3.5 bath home on 1/2 acre lot offers a light-filled open plan suited for today’s living. Gourmet kitchen with commercial range and 10 ft island, luxurious master suite, extensive built-ins and a level yard for easy entertaining. Lindsay Milby (434) 962-9148. MLS# 542568

5 NUTWOOD CIRCLE • $425,000 Sit and enjoy the waterfront lifestyle with expansive deck and over 300 feet of water frontage. The home features inlaid, alternate-sized hardwood floors and custom carpentry with solid core doors. The kitchen boasts maple cabinetry and quartz countertops. Helen Ascoli (434) 996-2225. MLS# 545216

Scottsville Community Farmers Market Now–October, Saturdays, 8am–12pm at Scottsville Pavilion, 125 Fleet Street 286-4994, scottsvillefarmersmarket.org

City Market

Now–November, Saturdays, 7am–12pm at Second and Water Street parking lots 970-3371, charlottesville.org

Stonefield Farmer’s Market

Now–November, Saturdays, 9:30am–2:30pm at The Shops at Stonefield shopsatstonefield.com

Nelson Farmer’s Market Cooperative

Now–November 19, Saturdays, 8am–12pm at 3079 Rockfish Valley Highway, Nellysford 760-6655, nelsonfarmersmarket.com

401 PARK STREET • CHARLOT TESVILLE, VA

434.977.4005 W W W . L O R I N G W O O D R I F F . C O M CharlottesvilleFamily.com

{our town calendar} PICK YOUR OWN Pick Your Own Grapes

Now–September, 8am–6pm at Kipps Grapes 540-948-4171, kippsgrapes.com

AN EVENING WITH

Blackberry Season

Now–September, 9am–5pm at Hill Top Berry Farm & Winery 361-1266, hilltopberrywine.com

Carter Mountain Orchard Peaches

Now–September, 9am–6pm at Carter Mountain Orchard 977-1833, cartermountainorchard.com

PROCEEDS BENEFIT:

Sept 4

Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs

Now–November, 10am–5pm at Dickie Brothers Orchard 277-5516, dickiebrothers.com

Thursday Evening Sunset Series

Now–September, Thursdays, 6–9pm at Carter Mountain Orchard Pick your own fruit, visit the Country Store, grab donuts and cider, and listen to live music while enjoying an amazing sunset. 977-1833, cartermountainorchard.com

Summer Movie Express

August 2 & 3, 10am at Regal Cinemas Stadium 14 & IMAX Enjoy a choice of Dr. Seuss’s The Lorax or The Croods for $1 on either day. 244-3213, regmovies.com

Free Family Film Series: ET

ALL SHOWS ON SALE NOW TICKETS: SprintPavilion.com, Downtown Visitor Center, 877-CPAV-TIX

August 2016

Music on the Steps

Pick Your Own Apples

Now–August, Sundays 5–7pm at the Frontier Culture Museum Celebrate the influence of musical root genres on American culture in a casual environment, with food and beverage vendors. 540-903-3613, frontiermuseum.org

OCTOBER 30

August 4 & 11, 2pm at Central Library Celebrate the publication of the new Harry Potter book by watching some of the Harry Potter movies. 979-7151, jmrl.org

Now–November at Hartland Orchard 540-364-2316, hartlandorchard.com

American Roots Music Series

Sept 20

Harry Potter Film Series

Pick Your Own Fruit at Hartland Orchard

STAGE & SCREEN

FRIDAY

August 4–7, 7pm at Aldersgate United Methodist Church Musical based on the story of Joseph from the Book of Genesis, featuring many different genres of music as well as dancing and a whole lot of fun. 218-3148, blackboxplayers.com

August 5, 12pm at Central Library Enjoy lunch to the rhythm of the Charlottesville Municipal Band’s Brass Quintet. Fun for the whole family. 979-7151, jmrl.org

TOKIMONSTA + KENTON SLASH DEMON

Sept 16

Joseph & the Technicolor Dreamcoat

August 2 & 4, 10:30am at the Violet Crown Cinema Enjoy the classic film, then redeem the ticket stub for half-price same-day admission to the Virginia Discovery Museum. 529-3000, charlottesville.violetcrown.com

Juggler Jonathan Austin

August 2, 10:30am at Central Library & August 4, 4pm at Northside Library What do you get when you cross a juggler, magician, comedian and unicyclist? The one and only Jonathan Austin. 979-7151, jmrl.org

August 7, 2pm at The Paramount Theater Enjoy the animated classic on the big screen with your family. 979-1333, theparamount.net

Moonlight Movies: Hook

August 12, 8:30pm at Carter Mountain Orchard Hook brings to life the beloved story of Peter Pan with a twist. Enjoy a spectacular mountainside sunset, food and a live DJ. 982-5277, virginiafilmfestival.org

Singin’ in the Rain

August 14, 2pm at The Paramount Theater A joyous and affectionate musical salute to the frenetic time when movies were first learning to talk. 979-1333, theparamount.net

Tuesday Tunes: Small Town Rodeo

August 16, 6–9pm at James Monroe Highland Bring your family out with a picnic to enjoy music that is a perfect mix of bluegrass, outlaw country, classic rock and americana. 293-8000, highland.org

Free Family Film Series: The Wizard of Oz

August 16 & 18, 10:30am at Violet Crown Cinema Enjoy the classic film, then redeem the ticket stub for half-price same-day admission to the Virginia Discovery Museum. 529-3000, charlottesville.violetcrown.com

Strictly Ballroom

August 20, 7:30pm at The Paramount Theater Scott believes in dancing his own steps. Fran is a beginning dancer and a bit of an ugly duckling. Together, these two misfits try to win the Australian Pan Pacific Championships. 979-1333, theparamount.net

Beauty and the Beast Jr.

August 26–28 at Black Box Players Features all of your favorite roles and some of the most popular Disney songs ever written. 218-3148, blackboxplayers.com

The Incredibles

Dinosaurs Love Underpants

STORYTIMES & GAMES

Mr. Lemoncello’s Library Olympics

August 27, 2pm at The Paramount Theater It will take a super family effort to rescue the world from total destruction. 979-1333, theparamount.net

August 6, 11am at Barnes & Noble The mystery of dinosaur extinction is solved, the dinos were wiped out in an Underpants War. Follow the hilarious antics of T. Rex and the gang. 984-6598, barnesandnoble.com

August 6, 3:30pm at Gordon Ave. Library Love books? Join in fun book-based competitions to get book brains whirring. Registration is required. 296-5544, jmrl.org

Tech Petting Zoo With Linden Lab

August 3, 2pm at Central Library Learn about the latest in virtual reality with Linden Lab. See demos then try out some tech toys like an Ozobot mini-robot and the 3-D Doodle Pen. 979-7151, jmrl.org

Mario Kart 8 Junior Tournament

August 5, 11am at Gordon Ave Library Awesome at Mario Kart? Rule the Rainbow Road? Come show off those driving skills. Registration required. 296-5544, jmrl.org

Storybook Saturday

August 6, 10am–4pm at the Children’s Museum of Richmond Meet favorite literary characters, participate in an interactive story time, create a storybook and even take dancing lessons with a princess. 804-474-7062, c-mor.org

Animals in Pajamas

August 8, 7pm at Gordon Ave. Library Bring a favorite stuffed pal for a special evening storytime, let them spend the night at the library and pick them up the next day. 296-5544, jmrl.org

Milk Goes to School

August 13, 11am at Barnes & Noble For her first day of school, Milk’s dad gave her a sparkly new backpack but what happens when some of her new classmates think she is a bit spoiled? 984-6598, barnesandnoble.com

Book Buffet

August 17, 9am–5pm at Central Library Try it, you might like it. Feast on fabulous stories about adventure. Check out your favorites. 979-7151, jmrl.org

Summer Lawn Party at Lewis Ginter Botanical Garden August 27–28. See page 17.

XOXo An exhibit about

Love & Forgiveness

Opening September 20, 2016!

This exhibition was made possible by the generous support of: The Sam and Marion Golden Helping Hand Foundation

THE CITY OF LYNCHBURG ARTS & CULTURAL DISTRICT

CharlottesvilleFamily.com

{our town calendar} Mira Forecast the Future and The Bot That Scott Built August 20, 11am at Barnes & Noble Two special books for this storytime, perfect for family listening. 984-6598, barnesandnoble.com

ARTS & CRAFTS Family Art Drop-In

August 5,10:30am–12pm at Northside Library Stop by to mold and design an Olympic medal. 973-7893, jmrl.org

Medals AldersgAte United Methodist ChUrCh Presents…

Children’s

CharlottesvilleFamily Favorite Award Winner 2015

Consignment Sale

Gently Used Children’s Clothing, Toys, Baby Equipment and lots more!

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August 6, 10am–2pm at Michael’s Arts & Crafts Kids can create medals just in time for the Olympics. 971-1072, michaels.com

Summer Memory Book

August 13, 10am–2pm at Michael’s Arts & Crafts Kids create a scrapbook just to hold special memories of summer adventures. 971-1072, michaels.com

Sticky Table Art

August 16 at Central Library Help create a wild and crazy collage on a very sticky table. 979-7151, jmrl.org

Night at the Museum

August 18, 5–9pm at Kluge-Ruhe Aboriginal Art Museum Explore exhibitions after hours with food and live music. Kids’ Zone includes Australian-themed children’s activities and a Flat Chat Tour. 244-0234, kluge-ruhe.org

FAMILY ART JAMs: Age-appropriate tours with hands-on art activities—an enriching experience for the whole family! September 17 | October 15 | November 19

www.virginia.edu/artmuseum/edu

museumoutreach@virginia.edu or 434.243.2050

Ice Cream Pencil Topper

August 20, 10am–2pm at Michael’s Arts & Crafts Kids keep summer with them into the school year with this cool craft. 971-1072, michaels.com

NATURE & OUTDOORS Farm and Barn History Day

Now–November, Saturdays, 2pm at Ivy Creek Natural Area Enjoy displays on both the cultural history of the farm and the history of the natural area. 973-7772, ivycreekfoundation.org

A View From the Top

wvpt.net

August 2016

Monday-Thursday, August 8th -11th & 15th - 18th

August 3, 10:30am at Crozet Library & 2pm at Gordon Ave. Library Take a peek into the lives of birds of prey and even meet one in person. The Wildlife Center of Virginia will present about these magnificent predators. 823-4050, jmrl.org

Let’s Go Cook

August 4, 9:30–11:30am at Monticello Young cooks and their favorite grownups will harvest fruits and vegetables from the Monticello gardens then help prepare recipes that were favorites of the Jefferson family. 984-9800, monticello.org

Public Night at the Observatory

August 5 & 19, 9–11pm at McCormick Observatory Amazing views of our galaxy, weather permitting, along with a slide show and tour. 243-1885, astronomy.as.virginia.edu

Sunday Sundowns

August 7, 3–6pm at Washington Park Pool Join in another afternoon of fun, with a cookout, music, games and free swimming. 970-3260, charlottesville.org

Let’s Go Plant a Fall Garden

August 11, 9:30am at Monticello Young gardeners will learn how to plant “fruits, roots and leaves” for dinner in this hands-on workshop with Vegetable Gardener Pat Brodowski. 984-9800, monticello.org

Butterfly Walks

August 19, 10:30am–12pm at McIntire Botancial Garden The walks will introduce a variety of common butterlies native to the Piedmont region. 326-2375, mcintirebotanicalgarden.org

Charlottesville City Market

Thrill of the Grill Cornhole Challenge

August 20 at Carter Mountain Orchard Show off grilling skills and take the BBQ challenge. Competitions will be held at the professional, amateur and youth levels. Love cornhole? Enjoy competitions all day. 977-1833, chilesfamilyorchards.com

Now–November, Saturdays. See page 13.

Summer Lawn Party

August 27–28, 12–3pm at Lewis Ginter Botanical Garden Enjoy an old-fashioned ice cream social and picnic fare against a nearby backdrop of ragtime music and historical bicycle displays and demonstrations. 804-262-9887, lewisginter.org

Sounds of Summer

August 20, 6–8pm at Tonsler Park Free community celebration with live music, DJ and free food while it lasts. 970-3271, charlottesville.org

CharlottesvilleFamily.com

WIN a Family Adventure Package! $400 in attraction tickets awarded each week of the summer

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215 EAST MAIN STREET, CHARLOTTESVILLE, VA 22902 TICKETS • www.theparamount.net • 434-979-1333 THANK YOU TO OUR PARAMOUNT PRODUCERS CLUB SPONSORS

THANK YOU TO OUR SEASON SPONSORS CHRIS and BRAD EURE JANNA and DAVID GIES

THANK YOU TO THE NATIONAL ENDOWMENT FOR THE ARTS AND THE VIRGINIA COMMISSION FOR THE ARTS FOR THEIR GENEROUS SUPPORT

Momma Bear Consignment Sale

August 25–27, 11am–6pm at Old Northside Library Save on back-to-school shopping. Clothing and shoes, toys, books and DVDs, games and puzzles, strollers, bicycles, kids room decor, Halloween costumes and more.mommabearsale.com

Made 4 Kids Sale

CHARLOTTESVILLE NEWS FIRST

August 26, 7:30am–12pm at Victory Worship Center, Staunton Children and teen clothing consignment sale featuring fall/winter clothing, shoes, accessories and baby items. A portion of the proceeds will benefit local charities. 886-6249, made4kids.net

Don’t forget about Back-to-School schedules!

See page 43.

DATE NIGHT Once on this Island

WATCH DAN SCHUTTE AND TARA WHEELER ON CBS19 NEWS AT SIX & ELEVEN 24

August 2016

Now–August 7 at Four County Players Based on “My Love, My Love,” the story of a peasant girl who uses the power of love to bring together people of different social class. 540-832-5355, fourcp.org

Broadway at The Paramount

August 13, 7pm at The Paramount Theater A Broadway-themed musical revue

featuring 60 young performers from Charlottesville and the surrounding area alongside visiting Broadway Guest Artists. 979-1333, theparamount.net

Starry Nights: The Dickens

August 13 at Veritas Vineyard & Winery Spend a night on the lawn and listen to great music as you relax under the stars. Bring a picnic and buy your favorite Veritas wines, or enjoy the buffet. 540-456-8000, veritaswines.com

Grapes of Rad

August 14, 9am–3pm at Early Mountain Vineyards A fun-filled day of trail running, mountain biking, and then settling in with a fine Virginia wine in the foothills of the Blue Ridge Mountains. 540-948-9005, rev3adventure.com

HEIRLOOM FRUITS AND VEGETABLES ORGANIC GARDENING FAMILY FUN SEED SAVING CHEF DEMOS SOUTHERN FOODWAYS ALL ON THE BREATHTAKING WEST LAWN OF MONTICELLO CHARLOTTESVILLE, VIRGINIA

Tins for Tunes Food Drive August

August 20, 5–9pm at Cardinal Point Winery & Vineyards Featuring music by The Atkinsons and Spiked food truck. Bring a canned item to donate and enjoy the night. 540-456-8400, cardinalpointwinery.com

2016 Keynote Speaker: Chef Patrick O’Connell

2016 HHF Speaker: Joel Salatin

Southern Exposure Seed Exchange

Paint at Early Mountain Vineyards

August 21, 1–3pm at Early Mountain Vineyards Spend your afternoon sipping wine and creating a unique piece of art to take home. 540-948-9005, earlymountain.com

Bridget Jones’ Diary

August 21, 2pm at The Paramount Theater An average woman struggles against her age, her weight, her job, her lack of a man, and her perceived many imperfections. 979-1333, theparamount.net

Lock’n Music Festival

August 25–28 at Oak Ridge Farm Outdoor music festival with a blend of world-class music, local vendors and community engagement. locknfestival.com

For more great festivals and events, see our online calendar at CharlottesvilleFamily. com.

one y r Eve

Slice of the Pie a s e v r Dese

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Fresh s g Toppin

Locally owned

JABA SPCA SARA SOCA H.O.W.S. Toy Lift Live Arts Monticello HS Salvation Army March of Dimes Special Olympics Mosby Foundation Caring for Creatures ARC of the Piedmont Habitat for Humanity Albemarle Fire & Rescue Ronald McDonald House Make A Wish Foundation Blue Ridge Area Food Bank Thomas Jefferson Food Bank Shelter for Help in Emergency Independence Resource Center Virginia Wounded Warrior Program

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{living well new mom}

Newborn “Extras” Top 10 Newborn Features

New babies delight the senses as well as the heart with a host of irresistible features that make the sleepless nights worth the work. Here are some of my favorite newborn “extras.” RIB TICKLE. Pediatricians emphasize skin-to-skin contact for mother-baby bonding, and feedings are the perfect opportunity. The best part of serving it up with your shirt off is definitely the tickle that baby gives you on the back of your ribs while you cradle her in your arms. PHANTOM NIPPLE. Babies eat every few hours (around the clock) in order to grow and thrive. They’re so smitten with calories, in fact, that sometimes their mouths keep right on “nursing” when they’re sound asleep.

New Mom

by Whitney Woollerton Morrill

GROGGY GRIN. Everyone looks forward to weeks 6–12—the developmental window when babies start to smile. Daytime smiles will wow the world, but the elusive sleeping grin is a private thrill reserved just for baby’s most ardent fans. Red is the New Black. In Japan, the word for baby is “akachan,” with Aka meaning red, and “chan” being a suffix of endearment. Though a newborn’s skin tone is darkest immediately following birth, it lightens to a healthy reddish pink as he begins to breathe air. LIP BLISTER. It may sound like a band playing Lockn’, but take a look closer to home. In the middle of your baby’s upper lip is a perfect, translucent bubble from all those feedings. They’re painless and help toughen up baby’s lips.

CAPTURE IT ALL Ask your partner to photograph the adorable, fleeting features of your baby. Make an album for posterity at Apple.com or Kolo.com.

RUBBER BANDS. As babies grow and gain weight, some bear a striking resemblance to Mr. Bib, the Michelin man. It’s as if someone adorned their chubby limbs with rubber bands. Nuzzle and love each plump section before they are gone. HEAD PULSE. “Mind the fontanelle,” goes the famous line from “Raising Arizona.” The two normal gaps between a baby’s skull plates allow for rapid brain growth in a baby’s first two years of life. At the front (anterior) fontanelle, a pulse is sometimes visible. Be amazed, and be gentle. According to the American Academy of Pediatrics, fontanelles typically close at age 7–19 months.

CONE HEAD. Though babies on TV have perfectly round heads, many newborns enter the world with some “molding” or elongation of the skull due to QT in the birth canal. Most cases resolve quickly and on their own. HALF POPEYE. This feature actually belongs to you, courtesy of your baby. It’s the huge, bulging bicep that develops on the arm you use most to hold your baby. Half gym-membership, anyone?

Whitney is an architect who designs and writes for families. Her blog is theCoconutgirl.com.

August 2016

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{living well dear bob}

Expert Advice

Dear Bob

Your Parenting Questions Answered Our 8-year-old son has eczema, which is visible, and the other kids tease him. How can we help him deal with this behavior from the other kids? It really upsets him. I’m sorry your son is having to struggle with this both physically and emotionally, and unfortunately, such teasing isn’t uncommon—other kids can often be very good at singling out those who are different. The National Eczema Association has a great website with lots of practical information. There is much that you can do. One is to make sure your son himself understands all that he can about his condition to help relieve his own anxiety as much as educate his classmates. You also want to let his teachers know about his condition so they are aware of possible flare triggers, such as sitting near heating, using paste or working with clay, excessive exercise, etc. By being informed, teachers can also help serve as an emotional support for your child. The National Eczema Association has information packets for teachers that they can use to educate the class. Encourage your son to let his teacher know about incidents, as well as check in with his teacher on a regular basis. Finally, what probably will help your son the most in the long run is having a by Bob Taibbi good self esteem, meaning getting lots of positive support from you and building his confidence by challenging himself, and cultivating and appreciating his own skills and talents. I’ve recently remarried, and as an added bonus, I have become stepfather to three wonderful children, ages 6, 9 and 12. I don’t have any children of my own, and I’m wondering if there are some dos and don’ts I should be aware of? Congratulations! This is a big transition for everyone in the family, and it’s great that you’re thinking ahead. Here are three suggestions for you: The first, which you’ve probably already noticed, is that each of the children will respond to you differently. The children are also naturally bouncing off of each other and finding their own ways of getting attention from you, shaping your relationships. The point here is that you need to keep your expectations realistic, realize that it may take longer for one or two of the children to get close and that you will need to develop your own unique relationship with each one. Email your parenting This brings me to suggestion number two—nurturance concerns and queries to before discipline. If you start enforcing rules or changing rules editor@IvyPublications.com. too quickly, it’s easy for the children to cast you into the “mean Yours might be included in stepfather, you’re not my father” role. Instead, take your time an upcoming issue! building a nurturing relationship and only after that is underway should you gradually take on more and more of a disciplinary role. You want to back your partner up when needed in order to provide a united front, but initially, let her take the lead. This leads to the last suggestion—you both need to be on the same page. It’s not unusual for you to want to see some changes, but this is topic for you as partners and parents to work through together on your own. If you are having difficulty with this, consider doing a few counseling sessions just to have a safe place to talk it through. Again this is a transition, and it will probably take a couple of years for it all to settle into place.

WANT TO ASK BOB A QUESTION?

Author of 10 books and more than 300 articles—including the regular “Ask Bob” column in this magazine—Bob has 41 years of experience in couple and family work and is in private practice in Charlottesville (bobtaibbi.com).

August 2016

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{living well mindful parenting}

Healthy Habits Ways to Help Build Your Family’s Good Habits

Mindful Parenting

by Danielle Sullivan

“The kitchen is closed.” When I was a child, my mother would clean up after dinner followed by this announcement. It was her way of saying we had better not be in the kitchen making any kind of mess. I used to think she was crazy. But now, I find myself saying to my kids, “I’m done cleaning. Do not make a mess. If you use any dishes, you clean them up.” It’s my 2016 version of “Kitchen’s closed.” On a regular basis, I find cups from late night drinks in the living room, tea drips or sugar bits on the counter, or (gasp) a half-a-sink of dishes in the kitchen when I wake up—driving me mad. On the other hand, my husband hates how I am constantly doing the dishes. “You don’t have to run and do every dish the minute it’s dirty,” he says. He would prefer I relax more instead of getting annoyed over a trivial thing like dishes, but my thinking is that I would rather get the dishes done so I can relax. Of course, there are other bad habits that my family and many others are guilty of though, such as siblings constantly arguing, families not sitting together during dinner and everyone being connected to technology entirely too much. We all must make conscious effort to create quality family time, especially when lifestyles are much busier than ever before. Here are a few ways your family can overcome them: MAKE RULES TOGETHER. Create family rules with your partner early on. Together, decide what is important for you as a family and why. Different families have different ideas of what constitutes acceptable bedtimes, dinner etiquette and homework schedules as well as proper cleaning and organizational tasks.

TALK IT OUT. As the kids get older, integrate what makes good and bad habits into family discussions so you are all on the same page. This helps kids know exactly what is expected of them and every member of the family, as well as what consequences will ensue from bad habits. More Healthy Habits For more positive healthy NIP IT IN THE BUD. Don’t let infractions slide. Maybe you’re ways to protect you from tired and not in the mood to punish your child for a messy the harmful effects of room or for texting at the table. Frankly, it’s often easier to stress, see the American disregard it, but ignoring it will create an unfair element Heart Association website between siblings and will teach your children that rules apply at heart.org. only sometimes. BUT DON’T DISPLAY ANGER. Raising your voice or losing your temper is not a way to create and instill peace into your home. On the contrary, it just showcases your bad habit of losing your cool. Remember that children need gentle prodding and clear cut guidelines to thrive. All of us fall into bad habits from time to time, but we need to call attention to each and calmly redirect our actions. INCLUDE YOURSELF. Parents need to keep up good family habits just as much (some might argue even more so) than the children. We also need to keep up our own standards; we cannot fall into bad habits while expecting our kids to do better. Remember, they are watching everything we do, and we are constantly modeling good (and bad) behavior for them. Danielle, a mom of three, is a parenting writer and editor, specializing in health, lifestyle and pets. She loves to find new ways to bring more Zen and mindfulness into her daily (hectic) life.

August 2016

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and other cool stuff for kids!

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{living well healthy family}

Brain Boosters How Breakfast Can Help Boost Brain Activity

Healthy Family

by Kelly Casey

Breakfast is the most important meal of the day. We’ve all heard this, but did you know that the morning meal is essential to your child’s academic success? “Breakfast itself is important for children and teens. Number one, it can definitely help sustain their focus and give them energy to power through the school day; and number two, it can help improve their behavior and school performance,” says Amanda Crane, RD, a nutritionist with University of Virginia Children’s Hospital. Sugary cereal is often the go-to breakfast for busy mornings. But a better choice is a balanced breakfast inspired by the Mediterranean—combining a good protein (with omega 3 fatty acids), whole grains and berries or leafy greens. “Recent research studies are showing that this diet may help in boosting memory and keeping the brain sharp and alert,” Crane says. Here’s what else science is revealing about the much-lauded Mediterranean diet: Protein and whole grains are the desired long-lasting energy sources for a child’s muscles and brain. Antioxidants may help boost memory and are found in dark leafy vegetables (such as kale, broccoli and spinach) and dark-colored berries (including blackberries, blueberries and raspberries). Omega 3 fatty acids (abundant in walnuts, flax seeds and chia seeds) may also help improve memory function. Crane shares some of her favorite Mediterranean-inspired breakfasts that even kids will enjoy: SCRAMBLED EGGS WITH BLACK BEANS EGG AND BROCCOLI SCRAMBLE

Is School Lunch a Challenge? Keep children with nut allergies safe at school by packing an allergen-free lunch. Get 5 lunch ideas recommended by a UVA dietitian at uvahealth.com/lunch.

YOGURT PARFAIT LOADED WITH BLUEBERRIES, RASPBERRIES, WALNUTS AND OATMEAL FRUIT SMOOTHIE WITH KALE AND CHIA OR FLAX SEEDS WHOLE-WHEAT TOAST WITH PEANUT BUTTER

When short on time, your child can grab a baggy full of whole-grain cereal, fruit and a handful of nuts or a cheese stick to go. Frozen waffles even make a convenient breakfast. Just make sure to choose a whole-grain variety and top with your child’s favorite berries. Also look for a whole-grain muffin mix and add in some chia seeds. Cereal is fine for breakfast. Just make sure it, too, is whole grain and naturally sweetened with berries. “Whole grains are loaded with fiber and nutrients to help promote a feeling of fullness and provide energy throughout the day,” Crane says. “Sugary cereal, on the other hand, gives a quick burst of energy but can make you feel tired and hungry before lunch,” she adds. And by topping cereal with berries, your child will head off to school full of memoryenhancing antioxidants.

Kelly is a medical writer for the University of Virginia Health System. For more insight on kids’ health, go to childrens.uvahealth.com.

August 2016

voted #1

Voted Charlottesville’s Favorite Chiropractor 2009 - 2015

Favorite Family orthodontist 2009, 2010, 2011, 2012 , 2013, 2014 & 2015

Dr. Michelle Heppner 2 0 1 4

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Curiosity

Achievement

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{living well tips & trends} No Bake Treats: Incredible Unbaked Cheesecakes, Icebox Cakes, Pies and More For dessert inspiration that takes the … umm … cake without heating up the house, look no further than Julianne Bayer’s new cookbook. From S’mores Lasagna to Dulce De Leche Pie, you’ll find exceptional flavor temptations for every palate. $13.99 at New Dominion Bookshop

Tips

TRENDS by Lynn Thorne

Making a splash Don’t skip the workout just because of the 1. Swimming freestyle laps burns 476 heat; hit the water instead. Try the new calories an hour. Deep Waves Ex and Aqua Power workout 2. An inexpensive kick board, swim fins or at ACAC in Charlottesville—30 minutes of hand paddles will give your strokes some shallow-end, fully-body strength and core. If variety. classes aren’t your thing, try these tricks: 3. Mix up sprints with a relaxed pace to rev up your calorie burn.

mily Thank you for voting! esvilleFa ChaFrlaovttorite Aewr ard Win20n15

Authentic Italian Gelato and Sorbet LaVazza Espresso & Coffee Italian Hot Chocolate • Pastries • Wi-Fi

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Pioneers in Charlottesville’s natural foods & products movement since 1987

Cohousing: Yesterday’s neighborhood today A pedestrian-friendly village of private homes where neighbors interact.

Emerson

COMMONS

Private homes, public spaces. Crozet, VA

August 2016

Stop in for your back-to-school needs, including: • Cute lunchboxes and water bottles • Supplements for attention and immunity • Healthy lunch snacks Mon-Sat 9-8, Sun 10-6

Learn more and find out about our next Open House at: emersoncommons.org

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Q A

Healthy Summer Skin My skin feels so different in the summer heat. How can I nourish it without making it greasy? According to the American Skin Association (ASA), our bodies between 55 to 75 percent water! To keep your skin hydrated, the ASA recommends eight glasses of water daily, getting plenty of Vitamin A and D, and washing with warm water and a gentle soap both morning and night.

HOW MUCH WATER DO YOU NEED? The American Heart Association (AHA) breaks down hydration: one pound equals one pint of water. Thus, you’ll need to replenish your body with one pint of water per pound lost during working out. In fact, the AHA notes that when you get thirsty, you are already dehydrated.

“I didn’t get there by wishing for it or hoping for it, but by working for it.”

— Estée Lauder

LIFE360 Think of it as the new family circle. Life360 is a family locator, messaging tool and communications app. It’s especially handy for traveling teens or for finding an aging parent when you can’t get in touch.

Slather on the Lather Wake up your senses with City Slicker Soap from local soap maker Grubby Girl. Coffee, cinnamon and clove, mixed with a touch of citrus for an energizing clean. $4 per bar at the Charlottesville City Market or grubbygirl.com.

Lynn's husband and two sons wish she liked cooking more and reading, writing, performing and hunting ghosts less.

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{living well home and garden}

Endless Beauty Create a String Garden (Kokedama) by Tracey Crehan Gerlach

Minimalism and a rainforest-like nod to gardening collide in kokedama—the Japanese art of string gardens or moss balls. Plants tucked into soil that is then wrapped in moss hang mid-air in line of sight, so the entire plant—roots and all—are easily visible. Incorporating these into your landscape, porch garden or among your houseplants requires so little space, the possibilities are endless.

SUPPLIES: Shade-tolerant plants (good ones for beginners include: begonias, geraniums, ferns, spider plants, philodendron and pothos); akadama soil (used for bonsai plants), peat moss (or, more environmentally friendly, coir) and sand; sphagnum moss; sheet moss; hemp or twine; and cotton string. MIX THE SOIL: You’ll want about 40 percent akadama soil; 45 percent peat moss; and 15 percent sand. Mix until you have a clay-like growing medium. PREP YOUR PLANTS: Carefully remove as much original soil from around the plant roots as possible. Dip in water and squeeze out. Wrap the roots in a bit of sphagnum moss, and then wrap cotton thread around it to secure everything. BUILD YOUR MOSS BALL: Shape your soil mixture into a ball, the size of an orange or larger if called for. Divide the ball in half, and place your plant in the middle—reforming the ball around the roots. Take sheet moss and wrap it around the ball. Now, use twine to provide one more wrapping layer, keeping everything in place and leaving enough twine left for hanging your creation. MAINTENANCE: Once a week, soak it in water for 10–15 minutes. Allow time for them to drain completely before re-hanging.

August 2016

Julia Reed’s South: Spirited Entertaining and Hig h-Style Fun All Year Long This fan-favorite celebrates Southern heritage and hospitality in this gorgeously photographed guide to hosting parties. Reed brings her history and knowledge of Southern gatherings through the seasons by way of 11 event menus, including a spring lunch, a Christmas cocktail supper, a summer lawn party and a hunt season breakfast. $50 at Over the Moon Bookstore.

Home In summer, the song sings itself.” . —William Carlos Williams

Garden

Stainless Steel Canteens

Corkcicle stainless steel canteens will keep your drink cold for 25 hours or hot for 12 hours. Available locally in 16 and 25 ounces, they come with wide mouths and grippy bottoms in summery colors like Peach Echo, Peri Peri (pale purple) and Caribbean Green (pictured). $27.95 & $32.95 from The Happy Cook.

CharlottesvilleFamily.com

{living well home and garden} Zucchini Pancakes A quick dish that can use some of your zucchini bounty (a plus this time of year). Serve with a side of sour cream.

Grate 2 small zucchinis into a colander in the sink; toss with 2

teaspoons salt and let sit 10 minutes. Squeeze out the liquid. DO NOT SKIP

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Mix zucchini with 4 minced

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1 beaten egg, 3/4 cup grated Parmesan

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powder, as well as decreasing the flour a bit and replacing it with some seasoned Italian breadcrumbs.)

Pan-fry spoonfuls of the mixture in olive oil or a mix of olive oil and

butter, flattening with the back of a

Breathe.

large spoon. It should take about 3â&#x20AC;&#x201C;4 minutes per side. Drain them on paper

Sweat.

towels.

Pray.

Adapted from The Food Network recipe.

CharlottesvilleFamily ashtangacharlottesville.com 38

August 2016

434.531.5441

Favorite Award Winner 2015

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We Carry Small Animals, Birds, Reptiles, and Fish

BACK-TO-SCH

ook to faceb Log on to e back to shar d n a s tip school and s e c r u reso stories, s. facebook. n questio family ttesville lo r a h c / com

SHOP TAX FREE 40

G 7-9

August 2016

Purchases of certain school supplies, clothing and footwear are exempt from the Virginia sales tax on these days. Each eligible school supply item must be priced at $20 or less, and each eligible article of clothing and footwear must be $100 or less. For details, visit tax.virginia.gov.

AUG 5-7

{resources back-to-school}

HOOL

For more Back-to-School, visit us online!

5 tips

for School Success

STAY ORGANIZED

Make mornings easier by stocking baskets, one for each family member, with those items you always seem to be scrambling for in the morning rush. That way, hats, umbrellas and other accessories

are all right there waiting for you when you need them.

KEEP CONNECTED

Even in today’s electronic world, keeping a family calendar of events is a great way to keep everyone on the same page. Make note of sports, homework assignments and other activities to make sure

everyone stays in the loop.

GET ENOUGH SLEEP

Getting the recommended amount of sleep each night can help boost kids’ energy and concentration. Encourage reading before bed, instead of something like TV that’s stimulating and can inhibit

them from falling asleep.

START THE DAY RIGHT

By eating a nutritious breakfast, students’ attendance and overall academic achievement drastically improves. Keep things simple with foods like smoothies, peanut butter toast and low-

sugar cereals. Breakfasts including protein will keep them filled and attentive until lunchtime.

ESTABLISH GOOD HOMEWORK HABITS

Make sure you have a permanent workspace away from distractions, and set aside ample time each night for completing assignments.

y First da ol: of scho 23 August

Spring break: April 3-7

Winter break: Dec. 19-30

DATES

Last day of school: June 9

if no make-up days

TO REMEMBER Mark your calendar with these important dates for Charlottesville and Albemarle County public schools. CharlottesvilleFamily.com

{resources back-to-school}

7 tips

for Getting to School Safely

SUPERINTENDENT MESSAGES Dr. Rosa S. Atkins, Superintendent of Charlottesville City Schools, and Dr. Pamela R. Moran, Superintendent of Albemarle County Public Schools, are both excited about the new 2016-2017 school year.

Dr. Rosa S. Atkins

Dr. Pamela R. Moran

August 2016

Dr. Atkins says: “We’re looking forward to another great year. Our engineering programs are well established at Buford Middle School and Charlottesville High School. And this year, we are adding iSTEM teachers in all of our schools to lay a strong foundation in science, technology, engineering and math. Yet, even as we implement this STEM curriculum, we continue to support and celebrate our strong fine arts programs, including Buford’s Grand Champion band and orchestra! We’re also adding swimming to the PE curriculum at Walker School, a new program developed in response to students’ request.” Dr. Moran, one of 20 superintendents nationwide recognized by Project Tomorrow for innovative leadership, says: “We highly value the relationships we build with our community, because they make a significant difference in the success of every student. I hope you will remain active in your local parent-teacher organization, as a classroom volunteer or mentor, or as a supporter of athletic, cultural and special events. This past year, a documentary film crew taped a series of videos in our classrooms and interviews with students and teachers powerfully demonstrated that truly authentic learning in the contemporary classroom is all about creativity, deep thinking, problem-solving, entrepreneurial spirit, teamwork, risk-taking and discovery. And most of all, it is about community.”

For walkers/bikers

It’s a good idea for children to walk in groups and for a parent to supervise little ones. A walking school bus—a group of kids from the same neighborhood who pick up friends along the route to school—is a great way to assure that everyone gets there without mishap. Cyclists should ride on the right-hand side of the street in the same direction as cars, never against traffic. Try to use bike lanes or designated bike routes whenever possible. Use intersections with signals and pedestrian buttons whenever possible. The most important thing for a cyclist to remember is to always wear a helmet! If you’re ever in an accident, having a correctly fitted helmet on can mean the difference between just a little mishap and a serious head injury.

For the bus

Always make eye contact and await the bus driver’s signal when crossing in front of the bus, not in back of it. Never pick up something under or near a bus! Always tell the bus driver if you’ve dropped something. Give a wave, and thank your bus driver and other drivers before and after you have crossed. This communication between you and other drivers promotes good citizenship and acknowledgement that you are safe.

OPEN HOUSE SCHEDULES ALBEMARLE COUNTY

SCHOOL SUPPLY DRIVE

Agnor-Hurt: August 22, 11am-12pm K-2; 1-2:30pm grades 3-5 Albemarle High: August 18, 6:30pm Baker-Butler: August 22, 3-5pm Broadus Wood: August 22, 4-6pm Brownsville: August 18, 4:30-6:30pm Burley: August 18, 5:30-7pm Cale: August 17, 4-6:30pm CATEC: August 17, 5-7pm Community Public Charter School: August 18, 4:30-6pm Crozet: August 22, 5-6:30pm Greer: August 22, 8-10am Henley: August 22, 10am-12pm Hollymead: August 22, 12-1pm Jouett: August 17, 10am-12pm Meriwether Lewis: August 22, 3:30-5pm Monticello High: August 18, 6:30-8pm Murray Elementary: August 22, 5-6:30pm Murray High: August 18, 5:30-7:30pm Red Hill: TBA Scottsville: August 22, 4-6pm Stone-Robinson: August 22, 4-4:45pm Pre-K-K; 5-6:30pm grades 1-5 Stony Point: August 17, 4-5:30pm Sutherland: August 22, 10am-12pm Walton: August 18, 4-6pm Western Albemarle High: August 18, 7-8:30pm Woodbrook: August 18, 4:30pm grades K-4; 5:30pm grades 1-5 Yancey Elementary: August 22, 4-6pm MHS Freshmen Orientation: August 10 & 11, 10am-3pm

CITY OF CHARLOTTESVILLE

The Salvation Army will be collecting school supplies for local students. Items needed include:

Backpacks

Pens

3-Ring Binders

Crayons

Marble Notebooks

Colored Pencils

Subject Dividers

Markers

Loose Leaf Paper

Scissors

No. 2 Pencils

Glue Sticks

They also accept check donations. You can drop off donated school supplies at the Salvation Army office at 207 Ridge St. and their Family Store at 604 Cherry St., PVCC and Walmart. Organizers of the drive say itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s a great way to make sure parents have everything their kids need for the start of the school year. 295-4058

All Elementary Schools (PK-4): August 22, 1-3pm Walker School (5-6): August 22, 3-5pm Buford Middle School (7-8): August 22, 5-7pm Lugo-McGinness Academy: August 22, 4-6pm CHS (9th-12th Graders): August 17, 5-7pm; August 18, 4:30-6:30pm CHS Freshmen Orientation: August 12, 8am-12:30pm

Online Resources for Parents: ccs.k12.va.us k12albemarle.org CharlottesvilleFamily.com/ school_connection.htm

CharlottesvilleFamily.com

{inspiration education}

You Can Do It! Encourage a Can-Do Attitude About Academics by Heidi Smith Luedtke, Ph.D.

August 2016

When we look at our children, we see possibilities and potential. We envision growth, learning and success. Even if our kids are struggling right now, the future looks bright from a parents’ perspective. But kids don’t always see themselves through the same set of lenses. A study by psychologist Kristin Lagattuta, Ph.D., and her colleagues found parents consistently underestimated kids’ worries and overestimated their optimism. Being assigned to a lower level reading group or getting a poor report card may cause a lot of anxiety. Since kids don’t have the same skills and perspective as adults, they may not see a way out of their current situation.

BEWARE OF MIXED SIGNALS

these simple strategies to help your child set

Reality television shows and overnight

goals, build skills and overcome setbacks:

success stories reinforce the idea that some people have talent and others do not. Psychologist Carol Dweck, Ph.D., calls this a fixed view of ability. Kids who adopt a fixed mindset believe they’ve already got all the smarts they’ll ever have. How depressing, right? These kids choose easy tasks because they don’t think they can improve with repeated practice. If they don’t succeed right away, kids with a fixed mindset give up. They see failure as proof that they don’t have what it takes, not as a signal to invest more effort or try another approach. Parents may inadvertently reinforce a fixed mindset in their attempts to boost kids’ optimism and self-confidence. Statements like “You’re so smart!” or “Math is easy for you!” sound positive on the surface. But they suggest kids should not have to try too hard to do well. As academics become more difficult, kids who believed “I am smart” and “School is easy” may begin to question their own abilities. Some kids start to doubt their smarts in elementary school, while others lose confidence in college. At any age, the belief that you don’t have the right stuff can be devastating.

You can help your child develop an learning

mindset.

Share your anticipation about a meeting you have at work. Say, “I’ll have a chance to present my ideas,” or “I can practice speaking in front of a large group.” Encourage your child to share her upcoming events as well. Focus on what you both can learn instead of what you could lose. “Include children in the development of your own goals for the family, such as budgeting, purchases, savings, etc. After that, it’s easy to say to a child, ‘These are my goals…what are yours?’” says Dr. Brice Jackson, Clinical Director at Charlottesville’s Connection Achievements and Therapy Center. He reminds us parents that it’s important to remain open to what our children brainstorm. “Don’t judge the goal,” he says. “Allow a child to discover for themself how realistic their goal is or how hard they want to work to achieve it.” 2. Tell Kids Learning is Difficult. A series of studies by French psychologists Frédérique Autin and Jean-Claude Croizet found sixthgrade students, who were told learning is hard and failure is common, performed better on subsequent academic tests, even

BUILD A CAN-DO ATTITUDE optimistic

1. Talk Up Opportunities. Each morning, discuss upcoming events with your child.

Persistent

practice is the key to academic success. Use

after they’d failed to solve a single problem in the initial set. Establish the expectation that learning is a challenge and many students struggle. Dr. Jackson says you need to find CharlottesvilleFamily.com

{inspiration education} what it is about a subject in school

Effort Christian School & Preschool

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etc.,” he explains. Remind your child that practice helps build new skills; no one is born knowing how to multiply fractions or how to spell “catastrophe.”

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being emotionally attached to the problem, and supporting the child’s

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Dr. Jackson adds. “A ‘can-do’ attitude

Very limited openings for the 2016-2017 school year

comes

from

child

internally

experiencing something they can do!”

E ILL

problem where the child is successful,” CHO OL OF CHARL RI S OT O TE SS S

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Instead

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didn’t get the answer right away.” These statements buoy kids’ self-esteem and encourage them to keep trying. 4. Take Risks. Kids need to see

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parents step outside their own comfort

CharlottesvilleFamily

zones once in a while. Try new things

Favorite Award Winner 2015

Children’s Dentistry with a Mother’s Touch

Laughing gas, conscious sedation, and general anesthesia Kathryn A. Cook,D.D.S.

General Dentist

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August 2016

language, run a race or introduce yourself to new people. Model the kind of courage you want for your child. And if things don’t go as well as you’d

Board Certified Pediatric Specialist Julia Guerrier, D.D.S.

that don’t come easily: Learn a foreign

hoped, zero in on what you learned. Every setback has a silver lining. 5. Reframe Limiting Beliefs. Your child isn’t likely to improve his grades if he believes he failed a test because

he’s dumb. A specific, situational explanation like, “I failed because I didn’t understand the vocabulary,” or, “I didn’t use the study guide,” moves your child in the right direction. Help your child make the switch by asking guiding questions like “What can you do differently next time?” Dr. Jackson suggests breaking an obstacle down into smaller parts to make it easier to overcome. He uses the example of a child’s messy room. “There’s a low chance that they’ll simply be able to ‘clean it up’ on their own. However, showing a child how to break the task up into smaller parts makes the cleanup much easier. ‘You put all the shirts in your hamper, and I’ll put all the pants in,’” he suggests saying. “The previously daunting obstacle becomes, in the child’s mind, easily manageable.” 6. Build Skills. Create a step-by-step plan to help your child develop new skills. Read books or watch how-to videos together. Create opportunities for her to practice in situations that aren’t

too

scary,

rehearsing

a speech in front of the family dog. Once she’s developed basic skills and confidence, move on to more challenging situations.

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7. Highlight Improvement. Learning

“I am drawn to the

is a process. Encourage a growth mindset by commenting on your

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know each student fully

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it. This calls for active parenting. You

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CharlottesvilleFamily.com

{inspiration parenting}

T A

K E

How 5 Minutes Can Make a World of Difference Story and Sketches by Luke Pieczynski

August 2016

It was a pleasant Sunday morning in December, and our family of five was all playing together on the floor of my son’s room. The sun was shining through the window as we laughed and built block towers only to be knocked over by our 2-year-old daughter. All in all, it was a great start to a lazy Sunday. Then the phone rang. Almost immediately I could hear the concern in my wife’s voice as she started asking simple questions like what and why. I grabbed all three kids and left the room, unsure of what the news might be. My wife’s friend and co-worker had tragically passed away. The beloved Albemarle County teacher, who specialized in early childhood intervention and education, was a passionate and caring individual.

CharlottesvilleFamily.com

{inspiration parenting} Regrettably, Miss Robin would also leave a void in our daughter Abby’s life, who was a student in her preschool class when she was 3 years old and fell in love. Her teacher was the first person Abby admittedly loved outside of our “Enter Here to Be and Find a Friend”

“My daughter had such a wonderful experience. It certainly helped her grow as a person.” - Elizabeth

immediate family because she knew she could be herself and open up her creative side—drawing, coloring, painting and building things. Abby went off on her own for a little while to cope the only way she knew how; she drew a picture of her and Miss Robin holding hands. What made the picture even more special was the beautiful crown Abby had drawn atop Miss Robin’s head. It was a fitting piece of artwork that showed how much Miss Robin’s impact would be remembered for our daughter, even at her young age.

Camp Friendship offers an exceptional overnight summer camp experience on a safe environment where they grow as individuals, make friends but most importantly they learn to have fun.

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Throughout this process, I was fearful that as a result, my daughter—my wonderfully creative and imaginative daughter—would lose interest in her passion. I was afraid that she would put her pencils and crayons in a box, never to be touched again. As someone with a degree and a passion for the arts, I could

GRYMES ME M ORI A L S C H O O L

Launching Learners

not let that happen. So, I decided to do something about it. For over a decade, I used mostly sticky notes to jot down to-do lists and the occasional sketch. I have also used sticky notes to surprise my wife with little encouraging messages. Sometimes I would write, “I love you, beautiful,” on a note and hide it in her car. Now, I thought, I could use that same idea to encourage my daughter as she made her way through school. At first, my wife and I would take turns writing things like “You’re awesome!” or “Have a super day!” on a sticky note and put it in Abby’s lunch bag every couple of days as a little surprise. At school, Abby would ask her new teacher what the note said, and her teacher would share the message with her. We were happy to hear she really enjoyed the surprises and

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school, we would add it to a glass jar we

August 2016

one yet.” If a note made it home from have in our dining room to keep a record

of them. As time passed, the notes got

a year’s worth of lunch notes. Since 2016

get her to share the creativity and to help

more creative using fun hand-drawn

was a leap year, it ended up being over

her understand the message each day.

letters and sometimes little characters.

366, and it continues today.

After seemingly exhausting the typical

Soon, family and friends took notice

It didn’t take me long in the first few

motivational messages, I had to find

of our collection and encouraged us to

months to realize it was difficult to come

other sources of inspiration to create the

share them online for others

content. I tried to find out what

to see.

the next school

A f ter

some

day had in store

thought and repeated

for

encouragement,

created

her

Lunch Note Sketch

that

was born. I set up a

it.

Facebook

was

page

and

an Instagram account

and note

referenced

tomorrow art

class,

for example, one

to share our sketches

sketch might have

in hopes of building

said “Be creative!”

that

Holidays made for

would encourage other

community

easy days to craft a

parents to be creative

message.

with their own children.

When

summer

In an effort to maximize engagement in

up with something new to say every

break started, I

such a community, I decided to challenge

day. The point of these notes was to

fit a “Summer Break Things To-Do List”

myself by setting a goal to create at least

have a message; it was not necessarily

theme. For the 60 days of summer, each

one sketch every day for an entire year.

just about sending a quick doodle to

note offered an idea to combat boredom.

So on May 6, 2015, I started on a journey

school. I wanted Abby to interact with

Looking back on the summer sketches is

for my daughter that would culminate in

someone, mainly her teacher, in order to

a nice way to relive some of the things

“

sketched notes that

The environment I came into was so pleasant, and the School recognizes everyone’s individual capabilities and talents. The people that I go to school with are so smart, so intelligent ... I’m motivated to be my best self.

It’s exceeded my expectations in every way possible.

”

Christian, Grade 10

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{inspiration parenting} we did together. For instance, Abby climbed a tree for the first time. She also learned how to snorkel while we were on vacation. Another challenge I met in those first months was how to make the notes more creative. I tried to use different types of lettering in the sketches, as well as little drawings. There was one note in particular, though, that was really well received by family and the small, but growing online community. I created a note that simply said “Read a book.” It featured a poorly drawn narwhal reading a book in front of a wall of bookshelves. Abby loved it. After seeing her reaction, I knew I had to utilize characters in more of the sketches. The narwhal has since been fine-tuned and other basic characters have been added to the mix. These characters give personality to the notes that make them a little more fun. More recently, I have been adding color to the sketches before posting them online. The note that Abby gets is still black ink on a yellow sticky note, but I add color digitally. Every week, I show Abby the color sketches from that week and she has fun telling me where I should have used more pink and purple. Two questions I typically get asked when talking about the lunch notes are: “How do you find the time?” and “How long does it take to do a sketch?” The notes that Abby sees in her lunchbox take anywhere from two to 30 minutes each, depending on the complexity and how many mistakes

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August 2016

I make along the way. Once the sketch is complete, I then transfer it to my computer to make final touches and sometimes add color before posting online. The entire process can take anywhere from 10 minutes to an hour. One note took almost 3 hours, but that was a sketch that encompassed 11 sticky notes, involved more planning and included multiple iterations. Finding the time is surprisingly the easiest challenge. When you are motivated by something bigger than yourself, something as important as making sure your child doesn’t lose her love of creativity due to a tragedy, then you are willing to sacrifice sleep over it. My day is structured like most people’s day. It involves working

am a night person. I function very well

make sacrifices when you are doing it

my full-time job, coming home to spend

by going to bed at 11 p.m. and waking up

for someone else.

time with my wife and children, getting

at 6 a.m. However, through a bit of trial

One week before reaching my initial

chores, errands and/or exercise done,

and error, I found that I function just as

goal I was talking to Abby about all

and going to bed. These are the big ticket

well if I aim to be in bed by midnight.

the notes that had been done. I told

items—the non-negotiable must-haves

So, just like that I found an extra hour

her that I was getting close to day 366.

during my day. But if I need 10 minutes,

to complete a task that means the world

She thought for a moment and told me

where can I find it? For the most part, I

to someone. It’s easy to work hard and

that she really loved them. I pressed

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BROADwAy AT THE PARAmOUNT

on by asking her why she liked them. She paused for a few seconds, and then with a big smile on her face, she said, “I love them because YOU made them.” My heart melted. I knew at that moment I had done something good. I knew I had made

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a difference for Abby despite an unexpected bump in her young life. Abby

now

her

way

kindergarten and still loves every note she gets. She is more creative than ever and even tells us she wants to be an artist when she grows up. Every so often, she will create a lunch note for me, and most of the time she draws

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me a self-portrait of her wearing a dress or holding a balloon. She is also starting to show an interest in drawing narwhals. From time to time she will request a specific lunch note, and I try to make that happen. It’s great how this little project has given Abby and I a special way to interact. As of July 10, 440 different sketches have been completed over the course of 432 consecutive days. These 440 sketches do not include the duplicate sketches I now create for my youngest

August 2016

and this number does not include the eight sketches that a Seattle-based father of two volunteered to create for the Lunch Note Sketch community. It was such an honor to have someone from across the country reach out to

WE MAKE YOUR SMART KID

say he was inspired and wanted to volunteer his time to create a series of lunch notes, and I hope to involve more parents in the future so that the global

EVEN

Lunch Note Sketch community can see

SMARTER

what other parents are doing to make a difference in their kids’ lives. As long as my children like their lunch notes, I will continue creating them. Given that my son is not even 2 years old, I imagine I will be doing this

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for many years to come. Some people have asked what they can do for their children if they are not creative. My answer is this: Do anything. Whether you have children, a significant other, a parent, a friend or just someone you want to help smile, all it takes is 5 minutes of your time.

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Instead of going to bed at 10 p.m. tonight, take 5 minutes to grab a sticky note, write a short message on it and place it in a lunch bag, on someone’s car dashboard or on the bathroom mirror. It can simply say “Have a great day!” or “Go get ‘em!” or “I love you!” If you get stuck, look up Lunch Note Sketch on social media for ideas. Just as Abby mentions loving her sketches because I drew them for her, it’s about the thought and effort you make to make someone feel special. Those 5 minutes could make a world of difference for someone you love. And it could make a world of difference for you. Robin Aldridge, an Albemarle County teacher specializing in early childhood intervention

and

education,

dearly

missed and will forever be remembered for her caring and passionate heart.

Luke, a loving husband and father of three, enjoys creating at least one sketch per day for his children. Those sketches have amassed a following of people from around the world. To view more, please visit LunchNoteSketch.com.

CharlottesvilleFamily.com

{resources education}

For the W 13 Steps to Being a Winning Parent by Dr. Alan Goldberg

August 2016

Win!

If you want your child to come out of their youth sports experience a winner—feeling good about themselves and having a healthy attitude towards sports—then they need your help! You are a vital and important part of the coach-athlete-parent team. If you do your job correctly and play your position well, then your child will learn the sport faster, perform better, really have fun and have his/her self-esteem enhanced as a result. Their sport experience will serve as a positive model for them to follow as they approach other challenges and obstacles throughout life. Your son/daughter and their coach need you on the team. They can’t win without you! The following are a list of useful facts, guidelines and strategies for you to use to make you more skilled in the youth sport game. Remember, no one wins unless everyone wins.

STEP ONE

UNDERSTAND YOUR CHILD’S COMPETITION IS THEIR MOST VALUABLE TRAINING PARTNER When defined the right way, competition in youth sports is both good and healthy, and it teaches children a variety of important life skills. The word “compete” comes from the Latin words “com” and “petere,”

which

mean

together

and

seeking, respectively. The true definition of competition is a seeking together where your opponent is your partner, not the enemy. The better he/she performs the more chance you have of having a peak performance. Sports are about learning to deal with challenges and obstacles. Without a worthy opponent, without any challenges, sports are not so much fun. The more the challenge, the better the opportunity you have to go beyond your limits. Your child should never be taught to view his/her opponent as the “bad guy,” the enemy or someone to be hated and “destroyed.” Do not model this attitude. Instead, talk to or make friends with parents of your child’s opponent. Root for great performances, good plays and not just for the winner. (Continued on page 62) CharlottesvilleFamily.com

{resources afterschool}

After School Activities Guide ALL AROUND SPORTS & FITNESS

CLUBS

Boar’s Head Sports Club 972-6031 See ad page 65

4-H, 872-4580 Blue Ridge Young Birders, 540-363-5035 Boys & Girls Club, 971-9400 Boy Scouts of America, 800-630-0620 Girl Scouts of America, 540-777-5100 Cavman’s Crew, 924-8821 Junior Achievement, 804-217-8855 Poetry Club, 977-1025 Police Explorer Post, 970-3280 Science Club, 977-1025 Table Tennis Club, 973-2931 Wednesday Music Club, 923-4001 Young Life, 964-1867

Charlottesville Parks & Rec 970-3260 See ad page 61 Piedmont Family YMCA 202-0118 See ad page 69 UVA Intramural – Recreation Sports 924-3791 See ad page 62 ACAC, 978-3800 Alb. Co. Community Education, 975-9451 Albemarle County Parks & Rec, 296-5844 Ch’ville Therapeutic Rec, 970-3264 Crozet PARC YMCA, 205-4380 Special Olympics, 800-932-4653 ARTS & CREATIVITY Crozet Arts 964-6770 See ad page 56 Lazy Daisy Ceramics & The Painting Place 295-7801 See ad page 71 Albemarle Artful Kids, 806-6734 Glass Palette, The, 977-9009 Les Fabriques, 975-0710 Light House Film Making Studio, 293-6992 McGuffey Art Center, 295-7973 Studio Baboo, 244-2905 Very Special Arts, 970-3264 Virginia Discovery Museum, 977-1025 Watercolor with Lee Alter, 963-0540 Woodworking with Children, 979-1220 BASEBALL & SOFTBALL Albemarle Babe Ruth Girls’ Fastpitch Softball, 263-4295 American Legion Baseball, 977-1050 Albemarle Redbirds Softball, 540-649-1234 Central Little League, 284-2173 Cove Creek Baseball, 970-2255 Jefferson Area Girls Softball, 973-5440 Lane Babe Ruth Baseball, 973-7457 McIntire Little League, 817-5100 Monticello Little League, 296-1251 Northside Cal Ripken League, 980-1256 Peachtree Baseball League, 823-7183 BASKETBALL

Ashtanga Yoga of Charlottesville 531-5441 See ad page 38 Flydog Yoga 964-1964 See ad page 35 The Little Gym 975-5437 See ad page 65 Wilson School of Dance 973-5678 See ad page 64 Albemarle Ballet Theatre, 823-8888 Balletschool, 975-3533 Bend Yoga, 296-2363 Blue Ridge Irish Music School, 409-9631 Charlottesville Ballet Academy, 973-2555 Charlottesville Performing Arts School, 293-2727 Charlottesville Royalettes Baton Class, royalette.com FootNotes Studio, 242-0605

HORSEBACK RIDING Camp Friendship 800-873-3223 See ad page 50 Carriage Hill Farm, 296-2672 Ch’ville Area Riding Therapy, 823-1178 Fancy Hill Farm, 589-8435 Graves Mountain Lodge, 540-923-4231 Grayson Farm, 286-4130 Hidden Creek Farm, 985-4309 Hoof & Woof 4-H Club, 872-4580 Mechums View Farm, 823-5419 Millington Stables, 823-5109 Montanova Stables, 295-2905 North Garden Equestrian Center, 882-1841 The Pony Academy, 823-6929 Rodes Farm Stables, 325-8260 Shadowfax, 960-3073 The Barracks Farm, 293-6568 The Pony Café, 977-7365 LANGUAGE The Han Studio, 327-9573 Alliance Francaise de Ch’ville, 260-0640 Speak! Language Center, 245-8255 LEARNING Mindworks 989-1481 See ad page 56 MARTIAL ARTS

Jefferson Cotillion, 242-0153 The Civility School, 242-0153 The Etiquette School of the Commonwealth, 996-4903

ATA Leadership Martial Arts 973-3000 See ad page 53

FENCING Blue Ridge Fencing Center, 227-4006 Charlottesville Fencing Alliance, 227-4006 FOOTBALL Piedmont Family YMCA Flag Football 974- 9622 See ad page 69 Pop Warner Football, centralvirginiapopwarner.com / 823-2987 Thomas Jefferson Youth Football, tjyfl.net

Piedmont Family YMCA 974-9622 See ad page 69

GYMNASTICS & CHEERLEADING

August 2016

AIM Cheer/Pom Program, 804-403-3902 Friendship Gymnastics, 589-5867 Pop Warner Cheerleading, centralvirginiapopwarner.com Thomas Jefferson Youth Cheer, tjyfl.net

ETIQUETTE

Charlottesville Parks & Rec 970-3260 See ad page 61

Scottsville Youth Basketball, 286-3612 Virginia Basketball Academy, 242-4986

DANCE & MOVEMENT

The Little Gym 975-5437 See ad page 65

Classics Gymnastics 978-4720 See ad page 67

The Little Gym 975-5437 See ad page 65 7 Tigers Taekwondo & Hapkido, 296-9933 AIM Self-Defense, 800-403-3902 Aldridge Karate Institute, 985-2049 Ch’ville Brazilian Jiu Jitsu, 825-6202 Ch’ville Judo Academy, 975-4482 Hiromi T’ai Chi, 877-880-2479 International Black Belt Center, 973-8885 L M Karate Academy, 589-5282 Laughing Dragon Kung Fu, 973-0318 Mountain Kim Martial Arts, 245-0202 Ssal Shin Jo Judo, 531-2951 Super Kicks Karate, 973-0855

(Continued on page 64)

ww w.c

F From clay creationsro m to outdoor adventures.t o.. h We have plenty of affordable activities for your family this fall.

Charlottesville Parks & Recreation invites you to discover our selection of over 200 classes and programs for kids, adults and seniors! Classes include dance, yoga, gymnastics, martial arts, aquatics, golf, art, outdoor adventure, therapeutic recreation and much, much more...

Registration Ends August 8th!

We h for ave you r

{resources education}

and winning and losing. Remember,

STEP TWO

ENCOURAGE YOUR CHILD TO COMPETE AGAINST HIM/HERSELF The ultimate goal of the sport experience

Youth Tennis & Swim Lessons Registration Begins 1/18/16

is to challenge oneself and continually improve.

Unfortunately,

judging

improvement by winning and losing is both an unfair and inaccurate measure. Winning in sports is about doing the best you can do, separate from the outcome or the play of your opponent. Children should

encouraged

compete

against their own potential. When your child has this focus and plays to better himself instead of beating someone else, he will be more relaxed, have more fun

and

therefore

perform

better.

STEP THREE

DON’T DEFINE SUCCESS AND FAILURE IN TERMS OF WINNING AND LOSING

Intramural–Recreational Sports 434.924.3791 recsports.virginia.edu facebook.com/uva.imrecsports @UVA_Recreation

August 2016

terms of winning and losing, you’re playing a losing game with your child.

STEP FOUR

BE SUPPORTIVE, DON’T COACH! Your role on the parent-coach-athlete team is as a Support player with a capital S! You need to be your child’s best fan, unconditionally. Leave the coaching and instruction to the coach. Provide encouragement,

support,

empathy,

transportation, money, help with fundraisers, etc., but do not coach! Most parents who get into trouble with their children do so because they forget to remember the important position that they play. Coaching interferes with your role as supporter and fan. The last thing your child needs and wants to hear from you after a disappointing performance or loss is what they did

A corollary to step two, one of the main

technically

purposes of the youth sports experience

Keep your role as a parent on the team

is skill acquisition and mastery. When

separate from that as coach, and, if

a child performs to their potential and

by necessity you actually get stuck in

loses, it is criminal to focus on the

the almost no-win position of having to

outcome and become critical. If a child

coach your child, try to maintain this

plays their very best and loses, you

separation of roles (i.e. on the deck, field

need to help them feel like a winner.

or court say, “Now I’m talking to you as

Similarly, when a child or team performs

a coach,” at home say, “Now I’m talking

far below their potential but wins,

to you as a parent”). Don’t parent when

this is not cause to feel like a winner.

you coach, and don’t coach at home

Help your child make this important

when you’re supposed to be parenting. (Continued on page 66)

separation between success and failure

if you define success and failure in

strategically

wrong.

CharlottesvilleFamily.com

{resources education} REGISTER NOW!

Classes start AUGUST 29 Ages 3 - Adult •BALLET •JAZZ •TAP •PRINCESS BALLET •HIP HOP •LYRICAL •CONTEMPORARY Build Confidence Gain Poise HAVE FUN!

Children’s program with combo class in 2 styles of dance

WilsonSchoolofDance.com or IN-PERSON REGISTRATION August 22 & 24: 3-7pm August 27: 10am-1pm

(434) 973-5678 Director: Juanita@WilsonSchoolofDance.com 3114 Proffit Road (Next to Forest Lakes)

MENTORING

SOCCER

Big Brothers Big Sisters, 244-0882 Big Siblings (Madison House), 977-7051 Computers 4 Kids, 817-1121 Young Women Leaders Program, 924-9732

SOCA 975-5025 See ad page 68

MUSIC Blue Ridge Music Together 293-6361 See ad page 64 B# Music, 806-3515 Bailey Lessons, 242-9743 Blue Ridge Irish Music School, 409-9631 Brooke Dezio Piano Studio, 244-0533 Charlottesville Performing Arts School, 293-2727 Fingerdance Studio, 466-1024 FootNotes Studio, 242-0605 Heinz Musitronics, 977-2797 Ivy Arts and Music, 984-0099 Ivy Piano Studio, 466-6985 Kindermusik with Pam, 823-2387 Lisa Luria Piano Studio, 987-5637 Music Education Center, 973-1032 Music Resource Center, 979-5478 Music Teachers Association, cvillemta.org Richardson Guitar Studio, 293-4017 Scottsville Center for Arts and Nature, 286-2806 Specialty Guitars Plus, 979-3800 Stacy’s Music, 974-1555 The Front Porch, 242-7012 The Music Emporium, 973-2931 VA Consort Youth Chorale Program, 244-8444 Violin & Piano Studio, 295-7449 Youth Orchestra, 974-7776

new expanded class offerings MORE SPORTS & ACTIVITIES Bounce Play-n-Create 973-1111 See ad page 63 Cavalier Wrestling Club 243-1939 See ad page 68 Highlands Golf Park 985-2765 See ad page 71 Meadowcreek Golf 977-0615 See ad page 66 Albemarle Girls Field Hockey and Lacrosse League, agll.org / 296-6005 Charlottesville Area Volleyball Club, 757- 374-0599 Jump!, 284-8248 Kegler’s Youth Bowling League, 978-3999 Main Street Skating Arena, 817-2400 Rocky Top Climbing Gym, 981-3306 Seminole Boys/Girls Lacrosse, seminolelax.org University Dive and Hobby Center, 2966306

August 2016

Charlottesville Soccer Academy, 242-7017 Monticello United Soccer Club, 974-4625 Scottsville Org. for Kids’ Sports, 286-2366 SWIMMING YEAR-ROUND Charlottesville Parks & Rec 970-3260 See ad page 61 UVA Intramural – Recreation Sports 924-3791 See ad page 62 ACAC, 978-3800 Ch’ville YMCA Aquatics Club, 974-9622 SMAC – Shenandoah Marlins Aquatic Club, 540-942-5107 Virginia Gators, 218-2487 TENNIS Fairview Swim and Tennis, 973-7946 Matilda Blue Tennis, 906-8554 Quickstart Tennis, quickstartcentral.org THEATRE DMR Adventures 203-6314 See ad page 54 Black Box Players, 970-7600 Four County Players, 540-832-5355 Gorilla Theater Productions, 547-7986 Jefferson Youth Theatre, 249-2803 Light House Studio, 293-6992 Live Arts, 977-4177 TUTORING Georgetown Learning Centers 296-5111 See ad page 71 Kumon Math & Reading Center 973-9040 See ad page 55 Madison Learning Center 540-738-2617 See ad page 69 Tutor Doctor 422-3595 See ad page 56

Parents! Please Note:

The information listed here is a general guideline. Some sports have height/weight and skill requirements. Please talk with the program leader to find the right program for your child. It is our goal at CharlottesvilleFamily to present families with a springboard to find programs that best suit their needs. CharlottesvilleFamily does not in any way represent or endorse any of these programs and, as always, we urge families to visit and interview businesses to make certain they are safe, staff are qualified, and they are good fits for your family.

The Little Gym of Charlottesville www.thelittlegym.com 434-975-5437

Building

friendships,

fun, & confidence one giggle

Parent/Child Classes • Pre-K Gymnastics • Grade School Gymnastics • Dance • Sports Skills • Awesome Birthday Bashes • Parents’ Survival Nights • Camps

at a time

Serve. Volley. Return. With a Sports Club Membership, take advantage of fall family indoor racquetsports. sports. With a Boar’s BHSCHead Membership, take advantage of fall family indoor racquet After School Programs | Adult Intro Clinics | Round Robins | Junior Racquet Raquet Clinics Clinics| |Private PrivateLessons Lessons CONTACT SAMANTHA STRONG, MEMBERSHIP SALES MANAGER 434.972.6031 | Samantha_Strong@boarsheadinn.com www.boarsheadinn.com

Owned and Operated by the University of Virginia Foundation

CharlottesvilleFamily.com

inspirationeducation baby guide {resources }} STEP FIVE

HELP MAKE THE SPORT FUN FOR YOUR CHILD It’s a time proven principle of peak performance that the more fun an athlete is having, the more they will learn and the better they will perform. Fun must be present for peak performance to happen at every level of sports—from youth to world class competitor. When a child stops having fun and begins to dread practice or competition, it’s time for you as a parent to become concerned. When the sport or game becomes too serious, athletes have a tendency to burn out and become susceptible to repetitive performance problems. An easy rule of thumb: If your child is not enjoying what he/she is doing, nor loving the heck out of it, investigate. What is going on that’s preventing them from having fun? Is it the coaching? The pressure? Is it you?

STEP SIX

WHOSE GOAL IS IT? IT’S YOUR CHILD’S SPORT! Number five leads us to a very important question: Why is your child participating in the sport? Are they doing it because they want to, or because of you? When they have problems in their sport, do you talk about them as “OUR” problems, i.e., “our jump isn’t high enough,” “we’re having trouble with our flip turn,” etc. Are they playing because they don’t want to disappoint you, because they know how important the sport is to you? Are they playing for rewards that you give out? Are their goals and aspirations yours or theirs? If they are competing to please you

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or for your vicarious glory, then they are in it for the wrong

parents feel good about what we do. This is how self-esteem gets

reasons. It is quite normal and healthy to want your child

established. When your interactions with your child make them

to excel and be as successful as possible. If they have their

feel good about themselves, they will, in turn, learn to treat

own reasons and own goals for participating, they will be

themselves this very same way. In this situation being empathic

far more motivated to excel, and thus far more successful.

and sensitive to his/her feelings is what’s called for. Self esteem makes the world go round. Make your child feel good about

STEP SEVEN

themselves, and you’ve given them a gift that lasts a lifetime.

YOUR CHILD IS NOT THEIR PERFORMANCE —LOVE THEM UNCONDITIONALLY Do not equate your child’s self-worth and lovability with

STEP NINE

TEACH YOUR CHILD THE GIFT OF FAILURE

their performance. The most tragic and damaging mistake

If you really want your child to be as happy and as successful

that I see parents continually make is punishing a child

as possible in everything that they do, then teach them how

for

emotionally

to fail! The most successful people in and out of sports do

from them. A child loses a race, strikes out or misses

two things differently than everyone else. First, they are

and easy shot on goal and the parent responds with

more willing to take risks and therefore fail more frequently.

disgust, anger and withdrawal of love and approval.

Second, they use their failures in a positive way as a source

bad

performance

withdrawing

of motivation and feedback to improve. Our society is

STEP EIGHT

generally negative and teaches us that failure is bad, a cause

REMEMBER THE IMPORTANCE OF BUILDING SELFESTEEM IN ALL OF YOUR INTERACTIONS

for humiliation and embarrassment, and something to be

Athletes of all ages and levels perform in direct relationship

to be tentative and non-active. In fact, most performance

to how they feel about themselves. When your child is in an

blocks and poor performances are a direct result of the

athletic environment that boosts self-esteem, he/she will

athlete being preoccupied with failing or messing up. Teach

learn faster, enjoy themselves more and perform better under

your child how to view setbacks, mistakes and risk-taking

competitive pressure. One thing we all want as children and

positively, and you’ll have given them the key to a lifetime

never stop wanting is to be loved and accepted, and to have our

of success. Failure is the perfect stepping stone to success.

avoided at all costs. Fear of failure or humiliation causes one

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{resources education} STEP TEN

CHALLENGE, DON’T THREATEN Many parents directly or indirectly use guilt and threats as a way to “motivate” their child to perform better. Performance studies clearly indicate that while threats may provide short term results, the longterm costs in terms of mental health and performance are devastating. Using fear as a motivator is probably one of the worst dynamics you could set up with your child. Threats take the fun out of performance and directly lead to your child performing terribly. Communicating this lack of belief, even indirectly is further devastating to the child’s performance. A challenge does not entail loss or negative consequences should the athlete fail. Further, implicit in a challenge is the empowering belief, “I think that you can do it.”

STEP ELEVEN

STRESS THE PROCESS, NOT THE OUTCOME When athletes choke under pressure and perform far below their potential, a very common cause of this is a focus on the outcome of the performance (i.e., win/lose, instead of the process). In any peak performance, the athlete is totally oblivious to the outcome and instead is completely absorbed in the here and now of the actual performance. An outcome focus will almost always distract and tighten up the athlete insuring a bad performance. Furthermore, focusing on the outcome, which is completely out of the athlete’s control, will raise their anxiety to a performance inhibiting level. So if you truly want your child to win, help get their focus away from how important

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STEP TWELVE

AVOID COMPARISONS AND RESPECT DEVELOPMENTAL DIFFERENCES Supportive parents do not use other athletes

that

their

child

competes

against to compare and thus evaluate their childâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s progress. Comparisons are useless,

inaccurate

and

destructive.

Each child matures differently, and the process of comparison ignores significant distorting

effects

developmental

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STEP THIRTEEN

TEACH YOUR CHILD TO HAVE A PERSPECTIVE OF THEIR SPORTÂ The sports media in this country would like you to believe that sports and winning/losing is larger than life. The fact that it is just a game frequently gets lost in translation. This lack of perspective frequently trickles down to the youth sport level and young athletes often come away from competition with a distorted view of themselves and how they performed. Parents need to help their children develop realistic expectations about themselves, their abilities and how they played, without robbing the child of his dreams. Swimming a lifetime best time and coming in dead last is a cause for celebration, not depression.

Dr. Goldberg, an internationally known Sports Performance Consultant, specializes in helping athletes overcome performance fears, blocks and slumps and trains coaches and parents on specific principles. He is the author of over 30 books and mental toughness training programs, and can be reached at competitivedge.com.

CharlottesvilleFamily.com

{until next time humorous reflections} Another Summer’s End Humorous Tales from a Dad’s Point of View School is about to reopen, and my kids will be entering third, seventh and tenth grade—if I can round them up and get shoes on them. They’ve had a long, lazy summer. Chores? By mid-July, I got tired of being the enforcer. The kids need school, and, personally, I’ll be glad when they’re back in it. Summer vacation is hard to appreciate unless it’s yours.

They had titles like Thomas Edison, Boy Inventor or Amelia Earhart, Girl With Wings. I read dozens of them searching for a way to achieve fame and fortune that wouldn’t cut into my leisure time. If my mom was around, she’d take us to the pool. If she wasn’t, my little brother, Jim, and I would dismantle quart-sized wooden strawberry boxes and use the

It was 6 o’clock on a Monday morning in August when my alarm pulled me out of a nightmare about work. I stumble down the stairs, already overwhelmed by the hard week ahead. Half my co-workers were on vacation, so most of their work was coming my way. The sight of our living room arrested my attention. Half-a-dozen kids were lying on the carpet, plus one on the couch. My older daughters, Marie and Sally, had thrown a slumber party. (Little Wendy was away, gracing someone else’s floor.) Popcorn was all over the place, and empty ice-cream dishes were distributed among the sleeping bags. The Pleasure Seekers had another successful night. I guzzled down a cup of coffee and headed to work, wondering, “Was I ever a kid?” No, if I ever lived a lifestyle like that, wouldn’t I remember it? But hold on! Bits of the past came back to me from a long, long distance.

“lumber” to make tiny houses in the back yard. Other times, if we had enough privacy, my big brother, Steve, and I would fashion a rocket out of aluminum foil and pack it full of match-heads. When ignited, it would flame and smoke extravagantly. But it wouldn’t budge. Although we regarded these rockets as experimental, we’d build them one after another in exactly the same way and get the same result. The only principle we ever proved was that you don’t have to be smart to be a rocket scientist. In the evening, when the ice cream man would drive his truck slowly through the winding streets of our development, Steve and I tagged along on our bikes. We chatted with him a little, but mostly we just basked in his glamour. Steve and I liked dirt, too. We’d dig big holes or throw lumps of it at other boys. But heaps of powdery dust were our special delight. After we’d discover a supply of it, we would spend an entire afternoon there throwing it up in the air, enjoying the smoky clouds we could make. Sometimes we played Army, and the smoke was from explosions. Later, settling down on our cots at night, we’d blow our noses and mud would come out. The perfect ending to a great day.

Well, I guess I’ve had my fun, and I don’t suppose a few indolent summers will hurt my kids any.

*** Each morning around 9 or 10 a.m., my brothers and I would awaken slowly on cots in our screened porch. Fireflies, collected the evening before, lay languidly in their jars. I’d dump mine off the back steps into the grass and head for the kitchen for a bowl of Frosted Flakes. I’d pour on so much additional sugar that I’d be spooning it up like gray silt from the bottom of my bowl. Mmm good! With body nourished, it would be time to improve my mind. I’d turn on the TV and try to find an old sitcom or Western. Or maybe I would crack open one of a series of little blue books on the childhoods of famous people.

by Rick Epstein

August 2016

*** Well, I guess I’ve had my fun, and I don’t suppose a few indolent summers will hurt my kids any. But still, I hope my young summer slackers aren’t expecting children in the future to be reclining in shady nooks drawing inspiration from slim volumes with titles like “Sally Epstein, Slouching Toward Greatness” or “Marie Epstein, Late Sleeper.”

Rick can be reached at rickepstein@yahoo.com.

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