Courage to Lead flipping preview

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COURAGE TO LEAD

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COURAGE TO LEAD Leadership Lessons from Kilimanjaro

Daphna Horowitz

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Daphna Horowitz

There is a leader within each and every one of us; all that’s required to be awakened is the courage to take one step

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Daphna Horowitz

First published by Stonebridge, an imprint of Jacana Media (Pty) Ltd, in 2014 10 Orange Street Sunnyside Auckland Park 2092 South Africa +2711 628 3200 www.jacana.co.za Š Daphna Horowitz, 2014 All rights reserved. ISBN 978-1-920292-28-7 Also available as an e-book: 978-1-920292-29-4 d-PDF 978-1-920292-30-0 ePUB mobi file 978-1-920292-31-7 Cover design by publicide Set in Sabon 11/16pt Job no. 002230 See a complete list of Jacana titles at www.jacana.co.za

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To Ivan Your love gives me courage to take on mountains

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Contents

Contents Foreword xiii Practising Gratitude xvi Why me? Why this book? An introduction xix

Part 1 – Doing 1. Push 5 Leadership Lesson #1 Define a great outcome, a super-vision that will get you through the tough times. 2. Question 13 Leadership Lesson #2 Question everything. 3. Quiet 19 Leadership Lesson #3 Take time for reflection. Allow your intuition to guide you. 4. Change 29 Leadership Lesson #4 Planning can only take you so far. Be agile as conditions change around you. 5. Stretch 35 Leadership Lesson #5 Stretch yourself to try new ways of doing things. Go beyond your comfort zone. 6. Toggle 43 Leadership Lesson #6 Goal, process, task. Take one step at a time and enjoy the journey.

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7. Celebrate 53 Leadership Lesson #7 Stop! Take time to celebrate. The hard work continues after the achievement of a goal.

Part 2 – Being 8. Leader 67 Leadership Lesson #8 Everyone is a leader. Find opportunities to take leadership in everything you do. 9. Basics 75 Leadership Lesson #9 Connection, togetherness, uniqueness. Clear the clutter. Keep things simple. 10. Rest 83 Leadership Lesson #10 Make time to rest, re-energise and refuel. Activity needs to be balanced with recovery. 11. Fear 93 Leadership Lesson #11 From ‘I can’t!’ to ‘Yes, I can!’ Face your fear and do it anyway. 12. Courage 107 Leadership Lesson #12 Act with love, self-belief and courage. Give yourself permission to be real rather than right. 13. Authenticity 119 Leadership Lesson #13 Lead authentically. Seek feedback. 14. Attitude 127 Leadership Lesson #14 Be the change you seek.

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Contents

Part 3 – Relating 15. Ubuntu 139 Leadership Lesson #15 You are a leader because of your people. The dance between individual and team is an important one. 16. Empowerment 147 Leadership Lesson #16 There is a fine line between empowering and abdicating. Make sure to empower. 17. TLA 155 Leadership Lesson #17 Trust is the glue that binds a team together, creating an environment of TLA – trust, love and abundance. 18. Team 163 Leadership Lesson #18 Encourage diversity on your team. Each team member brings a unique and valuable contribution. Practise gratitude.

Part 4 – Meaning 19. Why? 177 Leadership Lesson #19 Follow your passion. Understand your purpose. Do what you love. 20. Perspective 187 Leadership Lesson #20 Shift perspective. What do you see differently? 21. Women 195 Leadership Lesson #21 Don’t buy into the stories foisted on us of women in leadership. Create your own story.

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22. Story 203 Leadership Lesson #22 Make sure you know the whole story. Share your story. Listen to others’ stories. 23. Choice 213 Leadership Lesson #23 Be a leader in your life, instead of letting life lead you. Make your choice. 24. Possibility 221 Leadership Lesson #24 When things don’t work out as planned, take the learnings and try again. Final Thoughts 227 Leadership Lessons 232 Timeline 235 Resources 236 About the Author 238 Wholehearted Leadership 240 Leadership Q 242

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Foreword

Foreword I believe that when it comes to success rates on extreme altitude mountains, the real question is, for how long will your body tolerate the abuse of your own mind over it? When climbing in the demanding conditions of extreme altitude, certain death can result from even the slightest error. The success of a mountaineer is determined by whether he or she has the instinctive, practical and intellectual capability to distill life from death. Mountaineering continues to have significant relevance for business management. Several semantic parallels spring to mind: the career climb, peak performance, the rope-team as an expression of team leadership, all elements of teamwork, risk management, and creative expression. As a mountaineer, you need to ountaineering master the skills of management and continues to have leadership, including the disciplines significant relevance for of financing, logistics, strategy and business management. planning and all aspects of teamwork. Several semantic These basic skills will enable you to parallels spring to mind: pursue projects, finish climbs, build on the career climb, peak past successes, finance expeditions and performance, the ropeachieve your goals. team as an expression In a sense, every quest and of team leadership, all every attempt at path-breaking and elements of teamwork, pioneering is a search for meaning risk management, and and fulfilment, often in response to

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creative expression. xiii

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a clarion call that comes in the form of a vision or dream. The response is fuelled by a sense of adventure and ambition. And the result is an authentic happiness, an enduring joy and a selfknowledge. What there is to be discovered is not the mountain, but the person. There is a grand experience hidden in a successful expedition that helps me to build my positive self-image. This is transferrable to all areas of life. I perceive every successful act as a distinction which I give myself: self-respect grows and creates stability. Today, when I look back over my ice-climbing years, I remember those moments when I wanted to give it all up, when the very thought of climbing an 8 000-metre mountain terrified me. I was prey to all manner of doubts and fears. How often I questioned whether I should go on or not. You have to care less about image and more about imagination and innovation and initiative and the humility to begin at the beginning and build from there. Once on the icy face, you calm down, doubts fade, resolve builds and the ‘impossible’ becomes doable. You begin to see even repeated ‘failures’ and the need to occasionally back down or wait out a storm as mere delays or obstacles to inevitable success. From the beginning to the end of the climb, the ability to lead people often makes all the difference in the outcome. The proof of real leadership is in the success of the venture. Even if the summit is not reached, most goals are met. Leadership is not a contract, position, title or appointment but rather the projection of a personality who has the courage to assume the challenge. On an expedition, the leader does not live in a larger tent. The head of a group of companies does not have his office on the top floor. He is one out of many. But his voice has more effect. He speaks for the others as the representative of a group and as part of the whole. This book has something for everyone. In its pages are many vibrant messages from a woman who has learnt so many vital lessons of life and business. Daphna drives herself hard to satisfy xiv

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Foreword

her personal goals and aspirations, but also to enjoy inner peace. This book will help you find the free spirit that lies within you, both personally and professionally. Forget ‘how-to’ books on success and achievement. Daphna shows that true success comes from winning on nature’s terms through a clear understanding and personal conviction to the ‘why’ and ‘what’ that shape our dreams. Courage to Lead should be required reading for those committed to excellence and achievement. Nadav Ben Yehuda Extreme altitude mountaineer, Professional photographer, Social activist and Speaker Nadav Ben Yehuda attempted to summit Mount Everest in May 2012 when he found another climber lying unconscious inside a crack in the ice. Although he was less than 350 metres from the summit, Ben Yehuda turned his back on the prize to rescue his fellow climber, forsaking the opportunity to become the youngest Israeli ever to summit Everest. Ben Yehuda was severely injured during the rescue, and still struggles towards recovery. He was awarded a Presidential Medal of Honour for his actions.

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Practising Gratitude I always love reading the section where an author acknowledges those who have contributed to their lives in a way that enabled them to write their book. I often turn to this part first, before diving in to read the actual book, because it gives me a sense of who the author is, what support they had in writing their book and what brought them to this moment in their life. As I write my own acknowledgements and take the opportunity to practise gratitude, I realise that there are many people who have been part of my journey up to this point. Saying thank you goes beyond the people who’ve had a direct involvement in the actual writing, publishing or story of the book. It feels like the journey of my life, with all its stories and experiences, has come to a peak at this point with the dream of publishing a book coming true. So now for the thank yous… I’ll begin with the story. Thank you to the amazing team of climbers, guides and porters who made this trip possible. The stories are all about you. Without you, the book could not have been written. Specifically my fellow climbers: Robyn Smookler, Shira Zadikov, Tali Frankel, Kiki Marx, Yocheved Bacher, Kate Gershuni, Sharon Wilensky, Amanda Porter, Andy Kopelowitz, Estelle Smit, Siobhan Wilson, Raheema Ismail, Tahlia Levin, Jena Daitz, Galit Fluxman, Terri Zaidel and Noella Moshi. Thank you to our ground patrol team at ORTJET. Thank you to my clients, colleagues, teachers and mentors. xvi

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Practising Gratitude

Through you I have learnt many leadership lessons, which enabled my metaphoric use of the climb as a leadership adventure. Thank you to my writing coach and mentor, Ulrike Hill. You helped me make the dream a reality. You saw me through the hard times when I did not believe in my own writing by encouraging, questioning, supporting and editing along the way. Thank you to Nadav Ben Yehuda for the beautifully written foreword – you are an inspiration, a true hero. Thank you to the wonderful team at Jacana. I’m grateful for the constant support and dedication to seeing this book to completion – published and beautiful to hold. Natalie Gillman-Biljon, thank you for your extra-careful editing, attention to detail, questioning and fact-finding. Thank you to my parents, Yitzchak and Rachel Sharon, for instilling in me the almost insatiable drive to take on the next project and conquer the next mountain. Thank you for your belief in me and for bringing me up to believe that I’m capable of achieving all my dreams. Thank you to my initial readers who offered feedback, support and encouragement – Lisa Steingold, Tali Frankel, Robyn Smookler, Wilhelm Crous, Ian Ross and Sunny Stout-Rostron. A special thank you to Shira Zadikov for your beautiful photos that present the doing and being sections of the book and to Kiki Marx for helping me get the medical facts correct. Thank you to my family – Miri Ben-Ami and Dani Sharon (you get a special mention) – and good friends for your care and support always. Salome Ramatswi and Shelley Lauter, you give me the gift of time to pursue my dreams and for that I will always be grateful. Thank you to my children – Idan, Lee-Elle and Noa-Lee – who not only give me the time to write and write and write but who also take such pride in my achievements. I love that you think I’m crazy and that you love me for it too! I know that even though I’ve missed many outings and experiences because of my various undertakings, you always encourage me to go on and do more. I’m xvii

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going to take a break now and just be a regular mom. I love you. Thank you to Ivan, my husband, best friend and soul mate. You are my rock, you are my love, you are my everything. Your encouragement for my various projects (crazy adventures) and your love and support through life’s twists and turns mean the world to me. Thank you to Hashem for the big picture, for a life of meaning and spirituality, for creating a world full of splendour for us to benefit from, be challenged with and enjoy. “Walk with the dreamers, the believers, the courageous, the cheerful, the planners, the doers, the successful people with their heads in the clouds and their feet on the ground. Let their spirit ignite a fire within you to leave this world better than when you found it...” Wilferd Peterson

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Why me? Why this book? An introduction

Why me? Why this book? An introduction This is a leadership book. It is also a story of adventure. Because leadership is an adventure. As I contemplated writing this book, I was struck with the question of how to add value with yet another leadership book in the market. I wanted this book to be different in its perspective and approach. Within its pages you will not read about leadership theories and frameworks. Nor will you read a story of leadership through the eye of a ‘celebrity’ leader. This book goes beyond the theory and into the practical, using a storytelling approach. It is a ‘how to’ of leadership development – so that you can walk away with useful tools to develop and enhance your leadership. The main principles covered in this book are based on insights and experiences I’ve gained over my many years of work in a leadership context. The most significant ones are: ▲

Leadership is a much-deliberated topic, yet it remains abstract in many ways. Attempts to pin it down lead to the creation of various theories and frameworks. In many leadership development workshops and coaching sessions I’ve facilitated, participants often understand the theory and still ask, ‘But how do I do this? What do I do differently when I go back to work tomorrow?’ Leaders and aspiring leaders require a quick, practical way to understand leadership and apply its principles. xix

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Daphna Horowitz ▲

eaders are everywhere – in business, organisations, L government, educational institutions, communities, professional bodies, voluntary associations, households and many more. We need to move away from the leadership models of the past that attach the definition of leadership to corporations, hierarchical positions and perceived authority. Awakening the leader within marks the beginning of a leadership development journey that is within reach for all.

eadership is bigger and broader than performance and L results. It goes way beyond the operational view of how to run a system. Yet leaders are still mostly evaluated and rewarded based on tangibles only, dismissing a more holistic approach as ‘soft stuff’. There is a need for discussion and application of a broader, more holistic definition. This is what I call wholehearted leadership.

eadership lessons are frequently derived from the success L stories of renowned CEOs of large corporations, who inspire many to lead using their tried-and-tested approach. Yet leadership can be learnt from every person who faces the daily challenges of leading, without celebrity status or backing from a global organisation. Every leader has stories of successes and challenges we can relate to and learn from.

eadership is personal. I’m often confronted with the L thinking that work and personal life should be kept separate, that there is no place for any personal aspects to be brought into the leadership space. I believe that the opposite is true. Leadership is about who you are as well as what you do. By bringing your whole self to leadership, your leadership is enhanced. Wholehearted leaders show xx

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Why me? Why this book? An introduction

the whole picture of their humanity, authenticity, vul­ nerability and courage. Every human being has a story to tell, a story of courage and leadership. It is through sharing our stories that we gain the most learning. Our stories hold wisdom, depth, humanity and daring. By sharing my personal stories of climbing Kilimanjaro and drawing leadership lessons from them, we begin a leadership adventure. If you’d like to gain a deeper understanding of leadership and develop leadership within yourself and/or the people you lead, then the stories and lessons in this book will help you embark on your own leadership adventure in a simple, quick and practical way. If you’re a leader, an aspiring leader or if you work with leaders to enhance their leadership effectiveness, this book can serve as your coach and guide on this journey. Kilimanjaro is known as ‘Everyman’s Everest’. It stands at 5 895 metres above sea level and despite summiting posing a formidable challenge, no climbing experience is required. Anyone can attempt it. As the tallest peak on the African continent, it’s one of the Seven Summits: the collection of the seven tallest peaks, one per continent. Leadership has become ‘Everyman’s f you’d like to gain a Everest’ in a business context. Some­ deeper understanding thing to aspire to and something of leadership and everyone can learn to do. develop leadership Climbing Kilimanjaro was a lifewithin yourself and/or transforming journey for me. Every step the people you lead, then drew parallels between the climb and the stories and lessons in leadership. The summit is a metaphor this book will help you for the vision every leader needs to embark on your own hold; the mountain a metaphor for the leadership adventure largest obstacles standing in a leader’s in a simple, quick and way. The way the team was led, the practical way. way individuals came together to

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assist each other in various ways, the support team of guides and porters, the views from different perspectives – these are a few of the metaphors that can be applied to leadership. Every leader has a story to tell about their leadership journey. Each journey is a transformation. Kilimanjaro was my personal story of transformation. I’m no mountaineer and definitely not a camper. Traveller? For sure. Adventurer? Possibly. As long as I can have my adventure and then return to a place of comfort. In August 2012 I embarked on a trip to climb Kilimanjaro with a group of eighteen women I hardly knew to raise money for a charity that empowers disadvantaged women. Afterwards I returned to a place of comfort: my home. Upon my return, being back in a place that represents every­ thing that is nurturing and familiar was a true joy for me. I found comfort in sleeping in a soft, welcoming bed on cotton sheets in a room that isn’t subjected to nature in all its glory. The gift I’ve taken away from my journey is learning, the one thing that will remain once the heightened awareness of joy and comfort has disappeared. I’m now able to see regular things in a new light, going from having nothing to being immersed in day-to-day life again comes with a great sense of appreciation. If I were to sum up the experience in one sentence it would be this: Climbing Kilimanjaro was an experience of extremes – the toughest thing I’ve ever done and the most beautiful. Everyone has their own story about challenge and triumph, pain and ecstasy, suffering and resilience. Mine has stayed with me, asking to be examined, written and shared. Every time I caught a glimpse of Kili, in a photograph or travel poster, it would inspire me to tell my story. At first I heard a whispering in my ear that was easy to ignore. Then the whisper became louder. Eventually the sound became so loud that whenever I’d see the word ‘Kilimanjaro’ or hear anyone mention the mountain, I’d have a whole body reaction that said, ‘Write the book already!’ So here I am, writing my book and sharing my story of the events and xxii

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Why me? Why this book? An introduction

the learnings I derived from them. I share it with a deep respect for every one of the thousands of climbers who have undertaken the journey before me and since, appreciating that every person has his or her own story. I offer mine as only one of many and I include stories from the team members who climbed with me. My view is that leadership doesn’t reside only in business but in every aspect of our lives. Therefore this book is not a business book but a leadership book that will be at home on every bookshelf, coffee table and workspace. As you read it enjoy the story, absorb the learning and use any tips that may apply to you. Discard or debate what you don’t agree with. I see this book as a gift that was given to me through my experience. My intention is for people to give this book as a gift to themselves and to others. Its format is a combination of leadership learnings, stories, photographs and tips for application in our lives. I invite you to join me on this journey. This is a book to be savoured and enjoyed as we walk this path together.

The leadership framework An old folktale tells of a farmer who sold his farm to go in search of a way to make his fortune. He returned many years later to the farm that was no longer his only to discover that it was the site of a diamond mine worth millions. People often look far and wide for treasures they believe can only be found outside of themselves. Yet if they were to look inside themselves, in their own backyard so to speak, they would see that their treasures are buried within. Our potential, our strengths and our purpose form part of our internal treasure chest to be used to achieve what we want. Those treasures become evident only when we look for them, requiring hard work and perseverance. Leadership is an internal journey as much as it is an external xxiii

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one. There’s no one way to ‘do’ leadership, nor is there a formula to follow to become a great leader. It’s through combining what you do with who you are that gets you to greatness. Being authentic in that journey and combining it with a sense of purpose is central to wholehearted leadership. This is the journey explored in this book. The wholehearted leadership framework is based on research I conducted with everyday leaders who described their leadership journeys. The themes drawn from the research fall into four categories to create this simple framework: Doing: What am I doing as a leader? ▲ Being: Who am I being as a leader? ▲ Relating: How am I relating to others as a leader? ▲ Meaning: What is the sense of meaning for me in leadership? ▲

Meaning is the context in which the first three categories operate, as illustrated below.

Meaning Why am I a leader? Being Who am I?

Doing What do I do?

Relating How do I relate to others?

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Why me? Why this book? An introduction

This framework contextualises the leadership journey in terms of what the leader is doing, who the leader is being, how the leader relates to others and what meaning underpins all of these. This is a combination of internal resources and external actions that can be applied holistically to create wholehearted leadership.

Some caveats As with any philosophy or ideology presented to an audience, there always need to be some caveats. The first relates to the use of pronouns throughout this book when referring to leaders. To be fair to both genders and to avoid the cumbersome ‘he or she’ phrasing, I’ve decided to use ‘he’ in the uneven chapters and ‘she’ in the even ones. The second caveat relates to the leadership aspects covered in this book and how they were chosen. Leadership is a complex topic with many aspects and nuances. I’ve not attempted to cover all the aspects but rather those that were relevant to the metaphor of climbing Kilimanjaro. The stories shared will bring out what I have found to be interesting and important about leadership. One final and important caveat is that this book is not a mountaineering book. It’s not an adventure book for mountain  his book is for climbers, seasoned hikers and natural ordinary people adventurers. Kilimanjaro may not be attempting the an immense challenge for seasoned extraordinary, every mountaineers. For me it was a challenge day. This book is about and a metaphor for people attempting taking a journey, one to summit their own Kilimanjaro in step at a time, while their day-to-day lives. It is for people learning important who pick challenges to see how far they lessons about leadership can stretch themselves and transform and life. their lives at the same time. This book

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is for ordinary people attempting the extraordinary, every day. This book is about taking a journey, one step at a time, while learning important lessons about leadership and life.

How to read this book This book is designed for the busy leader – executive, business leader, entrepreneur and home executive. Each chapter will only take fifteen minutes to read. We often don’t have time to read a whole book so each chapter can be read as a stand-alone. Open the book at any point that grabs you and read it. Each chapter contains a story, a leadership lesson and a leadership challenge. Enjoy the story, take the lesson and reflect on the leadership challenge at the end. Ask yourself how you can apply the lessons in that chapter to your life. Take what is meaningful for you and use it. Anything that is not meaningful, you’re welcome to discard.

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PART I Doing

Taking on a challenge requires perseverance, grit and guts to push beyond our limits and achieve extraordinary goals

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Why me? Why this book? An introduction

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Meaning Why am I a leader? Being Who am I?

Doing What do I do?

Relating How do I relate to others?

Doing What are we doing? Most of us are busy doing a lot of things but the question is, are we doing the right things? Are we able to assess what we’re doing based on importance, priority, meaningfulness and desire? Or do we just do stuff because it’s what we do? Keeping ourselves busy is a syndrome of our times. I felt stuck working in a profession I didn’t really enjoy. For sure, I was earning well and getting great recognition for my work. The markings of success were there. But then a question began gnawing at me: Am I doing this because I can do it or am I doing it because I love it? The more I thought about it the more I realised that I didn’t love what I was doing. There were aspects that were enjoyable – the challenge, the learning experience and my interactions with clients – but there were many aspects that were getting me down. I was right in the middle of the humdrum of living Monday to Friday, looking forward to weekends and holidays. Work became a means to an end, the end being time off work. 2

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Doing

When I started thinking about what I could be doing that would make my life more fun, even Monday to Friday, I began to wish for more. I wished for a change. I wished to do something different. Doing is a great thing. Without doing, we join a team of navelgazers who only dream about life. But we need to be aware of what we’re doing and why. We need to be conscious of doing things that add to our sense of meaning, joy and fulfilment. The chapters in this section explore things we can be doing to increase fulfilment and happiness and focus more on what we truly desire. Before you begin reading this book, ithout doing, we I’d like to suggest that you go out join a team of and buy a notebook. It can be plain navel-gazers who only or pretty, dull or colourful, boring or dream about life. But beautiful. It doesn’t really matter. Use we need to be aware it to write down your point of view as of what we’re doing you come across an idea that excites and why. We need to you. Write down anything that comes be conscious of doing to mind and that you’d like to think things that add to our about further. Use the notebook to sense of meaning, joy reflect on the ideas and write down and fulfilment. answers to the questions I pose in the leadership challenges at the end of each chapter.

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Push

1

Push

Leadership Lesson #1: Define a great outcome, a super-vision that will get you through the tough times.

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It’s Monday. Our fifth day on the mountain. This day begins at 6am and will end only at 7pm on Tuesday, day six. A total of thirty-seven hours of being awake and walking. We’re camped 4 650 metres above sea level. A certain kind of energy hits our little campsite. The summit is near, the air frigid. Sitting outside our tents, we meet people coming down from the summit. They look shell-shocked, weather-beaten, drained. We ask questions but they can barely answer. I begin to get an idea of what I’m in for. This could be me coming down from the summit at the same time tomorrow. Having just eaten lunch, we’re told we’ll meet at 11pm for the summit attempt and are sent to our tents to take a nap. My mind is buzzing. I check my climbing gear, making sure I have what I need. I lay out my clothes so they’re ready to put on just before I leave. A layer of long underwear, a layer of fleece on top of that and, third, a waterproof layer. I make sure everything is clean and fresh for the long night ahead. I lay out an extra fleece layer together with some chemical hand and toe warmers because I know I tend to get very cold. I hope that these layers will be warm enough barriers between my body and the bitter weather. After the clothes are laid out, I check my backpack. Water bottles Sweet snacks broken into little pieces Hiking poles Head lamp Camera iPod

✓ ✓ ✓ ✓ ✓ ✓

I finish packing and lie down on my sleeping bag, waiting for 11pm. Everybody on the team has just completed the same ritual so we chat, we laugh, and we imagine what the night holds for us. We’ve 6

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Push

been warned it’s tough but little do we know just how tough. Not one of us really understands what lies ahead. We have no context within which to frame this particular challenge. So we wait. It’s summit night. Finally, 11pm has arrived. We gather in the mess tent for a final cup of coffee, tea or Milo. I begin an internal debate whether to fill a flask with tea to take along on the summit walk or not. This is a big decision since I’m carrying my own backpack and every little bit of extra weight adds to the load as the altitude increases. Each gram can feel like a brick when the air gets thin and oxygen becomes scarce. I decide to take the flask. It’s so cold already I convince myself it’ll be worth the effort. Looking like different versions of the Michelin Man bundled in our layers of clothing, and with torches on our heads, we proceed to the line-up as we battle the elements, our nervous anticipation and the complete darkness. Visibility is only one metre ahead at any point, and that’s thanks to our torches. A couple of hours into the climb, I’m frozen to the bone. A little later in the endless darkness of this night I don’t think some of my fingers or toes will make it. I’m exhausted, depleted and broken. Shuffling along step by step in the line-up, I continuously battle the grip of cold, the blanketing tiredness and my shortness of breath. I constantly need to be woken up by my buddy behind me as I sleepwalk, resting my head on my hiking poles, every once in a while. Most of the time I look at the ground below me, illuminated by my headlamp. I look up to get a sense of how far I still have to go and all I see is a row of tiny lights going up into the heavens, looking like little stars engulfed in blackness. These are the lights from others’ headlamps – the people in front of me are just specks of light, showing me the way up the mountain. Time seems to stretch to an impossible length. Weird and wonderful thoughts keep me going. It’s amazing to discover where my mind goes in times of real hardship.

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I think of my loved ones.

I think of the sunrise that promises to bring an end to the cold and darkness. I think of my goal: reaching the summit. I think I can, even when I think I can’t. I think until I can no longer think. I think of my mom, a soft whisper in my ear: ‘So, is it worth it?’ I don’t have an answer to that. Yet.

I reach a point where I don’t think I can make it. My breaking point. Just before sunrise. I cannot see how far I’ve come. I cannot see how much further there is to go. All I know is that I’ve been walking for hours and I’m now done. My body refuses to move. I can go no further. Thankfully, a guide indicates we can take a break. I’m left standing, not fully aware of where I am or what I’m doing. A guide comes over and physically manoeuvres me so I can rest my body against a rock. I’m only just aware that this is Nicholas. He takes my backpack and brings a few sips of tea to my lips. I’m now grateful for my foresight in bringing the flask of tea, at this stage barely lukewarm but warm enough to give me relief from the cold. Guides rub my hands, back, anything to get the circulation going and rub warmth into me. Then I see it: a sliver of grey in the blackness. The sun is beginning its ascent. ‘You can do it, Daphna. I know you can. This is hard but you can do it,’ a second guide whispers into my ear. This gives me strength. Just enough to get up again and reach towards sunrise, my only sign of the end. I stand up on shaky legs and feel the sun’s rays and healing power. Little by little, warmth and energy start seeping into my body and thawing my frozen bones. Slowly, slowly I put one foot 8

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in front of the other as I trudge further along the path. I make it, first to Stella Point, a milestone in the journey to the summit. Uhuru Peak, the summit itself, is a further hour of walking from Stella Point in the cold, thin air. The path seems endless, every slow step taking me closer to the peak. Every corner I turn, I think, This is it. We’re at the peak. And then I witness the snowy path continuing to wind its way up. Climbers pass me on their way down from the peak. They shout words of encouragement. ‘You’re nearly there.’ I feel I’m part of a much bigger team, all wanting to achieve the same goal. A few climbers walk in pairs, their arms entwined. They are partners in climb, supporting each other to the end. Suddenly I glimpse the ugly green sign that declares we’ve reached the highest point of Kilimanjaro. Ugly because the green metal slats stand in stark contrast to the natural, unbroken splendour around me. Yet nothing looks more beautiful to me at that moment. Tears stream down my face. I am here. I have arrived. I look around and take in the breath-taking beauty that signals my arrival at the roof of Africa. A 360-degree view where the world meets the sky. A view of infinity. This is the summit. We made it. We’ve reached our goal. The feeling of reaching the summit is incredible. It’s unbelievable that I’ve reached my goal and endured such tough conditions. I see my teammates and we hug, we cry, we laugh. We take plenty of photographs to preserve the memories while knowing that photographs cannot begin to capture the true essence of the moment. We’ve been climbing for five-and-a-half days, one step at a time. We’re enveloped in whiteness. Beautiful glaciers surround us. The air is crisp, frigid and the sun is energising. It’s quiet but for the chatter and giggles of excited fellow summiteers from all over the world, bearing their countries’ flags with pride. I’m injected with a sense of euphoric energy as I take in the scenery. To be standing on the roof of Africa is a dream come true. The brightness is blinding in contrast to the blackness of the night we’ve just endured. The 9

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contrast of white versus black, euphoria versus lethargy, light versus darkness. I am now in the light. I hold this image in my mind. I’ve imagined this moment for the last six months and now it’s real. It’s difficult to put words to a place that existed only in my imagination until that moment.

The leadership lesson In leadership, a goal that may seem to be only a dream is key to keeping people inspired and directed on a certain path. The challenges on the way may seem insurmountable. The costs are often so great that leaders need to ask themselves, ‘Is it worth it?’ The answer should be a resounding, ‘Yes!’ Others may fail to achieve the same goal but true leaders persevere until they succeed. Leaders need a strong, clear vision that keeps people going. A vision that they want so badly that a few frozen fingers and toes are deemed worth it. Having conviction to take on challenges and push beyond limitations means getting to the place where you think you can go no further and then taking one more step. Leaders need to ask themselves tough questions and then make tough decisions along the way. All for the purpose of getting to a super-vision of what they want to achieve. Leaders need to bring their team with them, to face the challenges head on, to push beyond the limits and take the next step, even when it seems impossible. Is it scary? For sure. Will leaders feel like they want to give up a hundred times along the way? Without a doubt. Do leaders have the tenacity and resilience to keep going even when the odds seem stacked against them? Absolutely. This is leadership.

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Leadership challenge Think of a time when you were working towards a great outcome, something really special, and you came to a breaking point, feeling you could go no further. What was your immediate response, to give up or push on?

Is your great outcome enough of a super-vision and inspiration to push on?

What would be an even more powerful super-vision?

What helps you to push on, beyond your limitations, and take one step further regardless of the difficulties?

For future projects, what truly great potential outcome would help you to push beyond your limits?

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Perhaps next time you’re standing in front of your team presenting next year’s ‘stretch target’, have in mind the journey, the battle, the costs that you and your team may need to endure to get there. Ask yourself, how you can turn a goal, something that needs to be done, into a great outcome that inspires, motivates and takes you on a journey bringing along your team and a whole support system too. Is your goal strong enough, meaningful enough, big enough to get you through times of crisis and challenge?

Watch this extract from the film Facing the Giants (2006) on pushing beyond your limits: www.youtube.com/ watch?v=gqGKxv2MHS0.

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